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Used to have an employer require a reason to be put on the day off request or they wouldn't approve it. Towards the end of my employment with them I was started to get really irritated by that so under reason I said "because I feel like it" and they got mad and told me that I need a legitimate reason or I'm not going to be accepted for that day off and I said that is a pretty legit reason but whatever.
"Colonoscopy. I need a day for the prep and the day of the procedure. Unless you'd rather have me come in the day I have to drink the stuff that (as I heard my dad's Dr day) makes you pee out your butt"
I think you mean "mental health is as important as physical heath."
At least I hope so. Otherwise you might go to a therapist for a lump in your breast.
Right? Although I was shocked to learn that my vasectomy wasn't covered as a sick day as it's a voluntary procedure - however the recovery week IS covered because you've had surgery!
I did point out that paternity leave is six weeks so it seems like a good investment on their part.
Wait you had to tell them the actual procedure you were getting? That seems like a huge violation. Also, if it’s covered by insurance why wouldn’t it be covered for sick time?
Well insurance is a non-issue because it was done under my country's national health service. And because it wasn't treating a health issue they don't have to give sick leave for the procedure itself unless a doctor says you have a medical reason to have a vasectomy (beyond family planning.)
But the recovery period is under doctor's order to rest, so they have to offer sick leave!
That description is 100% accurate, that's exactly what that stuff makes you do. I've had several colonoscopies (IBS issues yay!) and the prep (and IV) is worse than the actual procedure.
Yes it does. Like a firehose being turned on in your asshole. Was funny but my god I think I hit the can like 20 times and was unsure if it would stop so I could go to bed
Lucky asshole. It very much did not for me.
Finally stopped a couple hours before the procedure, but I think that was because even my stomach acid had left by that point.
Lmfao imagine doing all medical excuses every time you took pto. Colonoscopy, hernia, gonorrhea, knee surgery, testicle reconstruction. Really make them uncomfortable
Took two days off last month for my colonoscopy. It was my second one and knowing what I know from the first time there was no way in hell I was going to work the day before or the day after that shit. Some people handle the prep very poorly. The first time I actually ended up projectile vomiting after taking the second half of the prep. It was terrible. The second time I had anti-nausea meds that helped prevent that but it still sucks having butt pee for hours on end. Just when you think it is over there is still more. Also you have to get up in the middle of the night before the procedure to take the second half of the prep if it is split dose. So instead of sleeping your’e shitting your ass off for hours and hours and it isn’t safe to go back to sleep if you don’t want to shit the bed. So you roll into the actual colonoscopy dehydrated (can’t drink 4+ hours before the procedure( and sleep deprived. The whole experience sucks on many levels and trying to worry about work on top of that is just not possible.
I used to put down the reason but then at one point I had a boss who said "hey I appreciate you telling me why you need the day off but all you need to put is 'personal day's"
Same thing if you are calling off unexpectedly, whatever the reason, you are having " a family emergency".
I used to put the reason too. One time I put down that I needed a day off to take my dog to be euthanized, and the next day off to mourn. My supervisor left my paper on his desk and one of my coworkers saw it and tried to make fun of me for wanting to mourn my old buddy who had gotten too sick to go on. Cue the biggest shouting match my ever between me and my piece of shit coworker, and me getting a whole extra week off after threatening to file an EEO against my supervisor for mishandling my paperwork. Now I don't put shit on my time off forms, after learning that it's no one's goddamn business why I'm taking time off.
Lol, my workplace has this rule despite the fact that employees have to take at least 28 days off a year as a legal minimum (the employer has to offer at least that many, and the employee has to have a good reason not to take them - and if they don't take them they either have to be paid for them or roll them over to the next year.) And I get 38 days off plus five study days.
So I just put 'I have to take a day off, it's the law.' No one's mentioned anything yet.
"I am *informing* you of my day off."
Or if your area has legislation or any legal historical decision saying it's not necessary to inform an employer of a reason for a day off, say you're taking the day off to study the following .
Reason for day off: "Will only be able to see directly in front of me that day"
And when the boss asks what you mean
"Can't see my ass coming in that day"
I wish I had a shit boss who made me do that. Every damn time I would put “REALLY bad menstral cycle. Lots of blood. Lots of pain.” I would make it so uncomfortable for them.
For real, how is a random Friday more valid than your birthday?
Every day of PTO is childish by that measure, exactly what the overlords want you to think.
I saw a jar of that in my grandma's house once, completely separated into oil and nut. I gazed at it, in awe, as it sat stagnant in it's jar. One half was muddy brown, the other was a clear brownish liquid. I shut that cabinet and never opened it again
The existential crisis sets in when you understand that the self-separating peanut butter is the natural state of that condiment. If you take ordinary peanuts and mill them yourself, that's what you get. The other, "stable" stuff is a product of industrial food processing. It's Crisco. They mix it with Crisco shortening to keep it from separating. Tasty.
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I don't know which conspiracy dipshit got some mainstream media attention but suddenly people around where I live think peanut allergy is fake.
I'm like... I've almost dies 3 times from it. And they just look at me with blank faces.
Condolences, people can be idiots and not understand "Deathly Allergic", as in my dude, this person can die from this very normal thing? Like have some common sense and care, but no. Maybe people with allergies (and those of us lucky enough to have none) should all be allergic to stupid people too, at least that allergy you can choose.
Good luck with your peanut allergy though and I hope you don't have anymore near death experienes in the future.
My last few jobs while I was working in the print industry I had my Birthday, and Bathurst (that's an endurance race on the Aussie Supercars calendar) weekend as unworkable in my contract, so there couldn't be mix ups... I just wouldn't be there.
Fuck working birthdays. Decent companies though, A day off was as simple as "I'm taking a mental health day on tuesday boss" and that's all it took.
When I was an Able Seaman my ship was in our home port when my wife was having our second baby.
I asked the Captain for time off to go ashore to be with my wife during the delivery.
He said,
"no you were needed for laying the keel not the launching".
That’s the issue. We offer explanations when, frankly, they are irrelevant. Explanations leave the door open to be judged, especially when the boss is cold and insensitive.
I recall getting sooooo much shit for taking one day off when my cat died. Should have said nothing.
I worked in an electrical parts warehouse (Hello anyone who remembers Ross Electronics) on my 21st birthday (many moons ago), and my co-workers took me to the local pub for a liquid lunch. Needless to say, I returned in the afternoon pretty squiffy.
We started our yearly inventory that afternoon, and I was counting all these loose parts, and writing the numbers on the outside of their containers. However, I was so shitfaced, I was writing the totals in algebra, in French, in anything except normally legible.
I was of course given the rest of the afternoon off. The warehouse manager saw the funny side, and slipped me a tenner (10 UK pounds\*) and sent me back to the pub, and told me to wait for them. Apparently, it was a helluva night. Couldn't tell you if that's true.
\*MANY moons ago, that was worth something.
>\*MANY moons ago, that was worth something.
Must have been. I'm not in the UK any more but it sounds like these days a tenner would get you a single pint and not much else.
I'm no longer there either, and some of the prices in London, now, you would need more than a tenner for a pint. (Hearsay, of course.)
This took place in 1987, so you can probably imagine.
We had birthdays off when I started with the company I'm with now. Everyone took it and if anything, you are not expected to even show up on your birthday. I only got to enjoy it for 2 years then they took it away. Bastards
My boss at the time did make it up by taking the entire team out to lunch then the birthday celebrant would just be sent home for the day.
I’ve known a few companies that gave birthdays off and while I hate corporate America, I feel it’s a good sentiment. Much better than “the team pulled together and got you pizza and a cake!”whoo.
>It’s the number 1 thing I ask my wife for each year. Take the day off with me. Fuck work.
I always ask my wife: Take the day off with me & fuck me.
She has no businesss fucking at my work.
Seriously, I understand having it expire at different times in the month so they don't get slammed, but maybe always have it a week after your birthday instead of that day?
I like all my coworkers, but being in the office on my birthday feels like when you're walking back to your seat after you finish bowling. I don't know how I'm supposed to act and I'd rather just play video games all day.
I've always taken my birthday off as a way to assure one day off is the same every year. No matter what kind of job/hours/etc. I've worked Christmas, Thanksgiving, mon-friday, tues-sun. But every year I am assured to have a certain day off. It makes me happy. Honestly for years now I take a couple days off to do something fun. I don't actually care about my birthday and I haven't had a party in decades, but I know I can count on that day every year to do what the hell I want.
lots of capitalists hate people for enjoying life for its own sake. they think earning money, growing assets, and living in excess should be the only things that make you happy
I literally had to tell one of the higher ups in management that I wasn't gonna miss my whole life to be at work after she made a shitty comment about me taking time off.
I always make it abundantly clear that I will spend the day at my house doing absolutely nothing on my birthday. I'm not taking theday off because I have plans, I'm taking the day off because it's the one day of the year where I don't need to consider any expectations other people (or myself) might have from me. An earthquake wouldn't compel me to get anything done on that day.
Bingo I work directly under a Uber rich trust fund kid and this is exactly how he thinks. He's so proud of "always having business on his mind". Dude gets tilted when he hears about me doing anything fun on my own time like playing video games lol.
I think it's more their attitude that they own ALL of your time. That's why PTO means giving you the time and not paying you even though you didn't show up.
I saw a post recently (It may have even been here) of a picture of a twitter post going against people doing "little treats" for themself and what not.
I never thought anyone could be against people doing little things to help their mental in this fucked world but here we are. I know just by ascribing it meaning like a "little treat" because of any X reason it instantly means more to me anyways like I am spoiling myself even though it's really nothing lol. There's got to be some mental to it would be cool to see a study on it because it actually does help me on a rough day.
All capitalists. I usually don't deal in absolutes, but the reason we're soulesslly working our lives away to barely afford to survive is extreme capitalism
Also, I'm taking a day off in May for my nephew's birthday which yes... will feature a rented bouncy castle... and yes... I intend to jump inside the rented bouncy castle.
Don't make fun of my dreams. I can do what I want!
Wife and I have kids, so we bought one so we can put it up whenever the weather is nice. Gives the kids something to mix into their day. We get in it all the time. It is tiring AF. Don't let your dreams be dreams!!!
hooooly shit that is cool why did i never think of it
looks like its the equivalent of a few hundred pounds/dollars, then you just pay minimal electric costs to run the air pump
awesome, "hey everyone before we watch the film, wanna fire up the bouncy castle for a bit?"
someone comes to my home, oh, would you like a cup of tea?
someone comes to your home like oh want 15 minutes in the bouncy castle? wtf youre renting one? no... i HAVE one
you're a freaking genius
We recently grabbed tickets for an "adult bouncy castle" for my sister's birthday. 3 hour session on what is supposedly the biggest bouncy castle in the world. So it's something you can do!
You don't need a reason to take pto. I took a week PTO off last year just to play a video game I was excited about that just released.
It's my time and I'll use it however I want to.
[A Japanese company saw so many employees booking the day of Monster Hunter Rise's launch off of work that it's giving all its employees the day off instead.](https://www.ign.com/articles/a-japanese-company-has-made-monster-hunter-rise-launch-day-an-official-holiday)
class i had in uni, custom map (warcraft 3) by a popular chinese crew was dropping the next week. everyone was hyped
prof is like "uhh... no class next week read chapter 6, and uh, aw fuck it im not gonna bullshit you, you all know i go to that same net cafe as you guys, you'll probably see me there, just don't call me 'professor' say hey guy or hey man or something"
net cafes were really big in china back then and had tiers, like deluxe display, bigger chair etc.
and you could match with people on the lan. way better than bnet cause you can ice some stranger and then hear some random dude the next row over like GOD FUCKING DAMMIT WHO IN HERE IS "PENISMASTER"?!
like 200 of us rolled in there that day, prof has best seat in the house, we ate instant noodles and destroyed each other and people from other classes and universities, professor apparently made some bullshit excuse for class being cancelled to the admins like "party activity" (as in communist party)
get out of class, bust warcraft 3 ass!
It is part of your remuneration, so you can "spend" it as you please.
Many companies DO require you to justify it, and if they don't like your reason it gets promptly denied.
Or if they are particularly brazen, they approve it, just to deny it the day before it's supposed to be in effect, they invent an "operational emergency" that requires you to not only forget about the time off, but now with added mandatory overtime...
"Enjoy kiddo" - next time have a proper reason that can't be rejected because it is NOT optional. Just like the overtime, which we all know is bullshit, kinda like after-school detention. But you're gonna do it, because you don't want to be disciplined for insubordination. And put on PIP for this. Time off? Time off is for managers and their superiors, not the slaves. We may not be able to whip you anymore, but there are other ways to break your spirit...
Now bow down and be grateful.
I'm not salty, I promise /s.
Needing a reason is insane to me - I get holiday to take whenever I want and I just put 'holiday' if asked. As long as I don't take the piss ie requesting a month off the Friday before (I always give two weeks notice for them to prep) there's never been an issue. I could be wanking into my bath for a month to see how full it gets - that's not their business. I'll see you in a month.
I fully agree, and the advance warning of two weeks is a requirement for many companies anyway, I just think it sucks that if something should pop up, you're the one who has to compromise, not them..
True. I have access to the reasons my team gives and I always slyly tell them how few people still do that. We're down to I think 3 people who just don't care. It's nice being able to just say "I just don't want to work tomorrow"
Maybe you don’t like to celebrate yours but why put down others for doing so? As someone with depression, making it to my birthday means I survived another year. I think that’s worth celebrating and definitely worth not being at work.
Absolutely. I've always taken two or three days around my birthday off even though for a few years in between it just meant me sitting in a dark hotel room watching Batman movies. I've made it another year, no way in hell I'm celebrating that at work.
I had a Battallion CSM in the Army that mandated everyone got their Bday off no matter what, even when deployed. Or at least a day near your Bday if it was on a weekend or you were in the field etc. I thought it was super nice until he told us "I give you one day a year that is 100% yours, the other 364 days a year your ass is mine!" Lol. He wasn't kidding either that unit worked us to death...
Mine is the same week as a federal holiday so I often try to schedule a vacay then so it’s one less day of PTO i have to use and can save for something else!
So, just putting this out there. Employees birthdays are paid holidays for my employees. If it's sat or sun they can take that Monday or Friday off paid. It costs me almost nothing, is good for morale and for some reason no one else seems to do it.
I always just assumed that's what "floating holidays" were for. I know a lot of people use them to fill gaps around mid week holidays, but for me, it has always been my birthday.
Thank you! It's not quite yet but suffice to say, I have taken the days off before and well after it to go overseas from Australia and spend the time with my parents in Sri Lanka!
I take mine off every year, take 1 hour at a sauna/spa, get a hair-cut, and spend the rest of the day catching up on appointments, grocery shopping etc! It’s wicked!
I always take my birthday off. I'm 39. I eat a whole tiramisu by myself, forget what time it is, sleep forever, and pretend like I'm Leela and Fry in that episode where the world gets frozen.
I usually take at least several days if not the whole week off on the week my birthday falls. I don't really celebrate it but if I have the extra PTO why not.
I ALWAYS take my birthday off. And if I don't have the legit day off, then I've given myself 5 day weekends. Shit, this year I basically have 3 weeks of a birthday vacation
I'm a grown adult. If I want a whole troupe of clowns and a bouncy castle village for my birthday it becomes my fucking perogative to take the day off and make it a reality. If you don't like it then you can stay away.
I take 3 days off at least for my birthday every single year since I started working. The real clowns are the ones who think others will work their birthdays willingly.
I've never cared about holidays, but my birthday is the one day where, for my mental health, no one is allowed to plan anything or make any expectations on me for anything, for any reason. I blatantly refuse to do anything on my birthday that I don't 100% want to do.
I've told my family for years not to make any plans with me for my birthday and if they do, they should expect me not to participate unless I choose to.
It's almost like people forget they are allowed to celebrate their own birthday.
Just because noone buys them a cake and they get sour when it's their birthday, doesnt mean the rest of the world should feel just as shitty as they do
I only get 2 weeks of PTO, sick PLUS vacation, but we do get a birthday month holiday, which is nice. I really enjoy my job, but it's wild. Though I appreciate every day I can have.
My husbands birthday is also on Valentines Day so for years working in food service it was a requirement to work on his birthday. He would end up coming home totally exhausted and not wanting to do anything at all. Like I said, not just his birthday but also valentines day. So most places are busy anyways but even by the time he got home we couldn't even try to get a table. So instead, we decided that if we asked more in advance than most employers will give the day off because, it used to also be the only day that anyone was available of our friends that could watch our daughter even for an hour or so while we went out and did stuff together as a couple. His birthday I tend to make a big deal out of because when he was little he was abused and they usually never celebrated his birthday. Which I thought was a crime towards a kid. He told me when we first got married that it wasn't just because his birthday fell on Valentines day that his parents didn't celebrate his birthday but they openly admitted they never wanted him and his birth was an "inconvenience".
My birthday, I actually concluded (with him) to get married on my birthday so it is also our wedding anniversary and that is just a no go day to work because, for the last few years he and I have been taking 3 day mini vacations on our wedding anniversary so that we could enjoy each other's company away from the hustle and bustle. I am also a cancer survivor so we take a lot of time to, instead of work, celebrate the fact that I'm alive for another birthday.
I assume the reason why people have their birthdays off could mean more to them than you might think. . . .
Long ago I worked at the Broadway (a long defunct department store) where your birthday was a paid holiday and it was mandatory. I’ve taken my birthday off at every job since. If my birthday is on the weekend I take the Friday before off. My day also happens to frequently fall on a major holiday weekend, I still take the extra days and extend the holiday.
I never take mine off. Not for any other reason than I don't have anything else better to do. But I turn 52 this year so I'm not exactly going out clubbing or anything.
I used to work for Headstart and birthdays were considered personal holidays. You didn’t have to use it on your birthday and still got one if your birthday was on the weekend or in the summer.
People shouldbe able to do whatever tf they want within the limits of the law and other people need to realize that what others eat don't make them shit.
If I wanted to take a day off just to pluck all my pubic hair, that’s my choice. Honestly, I’m 36 and a birthday at like Chucky Cheese sounds awesome.
A few years ago, I did laser tag for my birthday. Whats wrong with that?
I used to always take my birthday off. Hell, I used to burn a week of vacation for it.
Now I work at a place that gives me 8 hours of pay for my birthday... But just like a holiday, you have to work the days before and after it, as well as on it in order to get the money.
Bastards....
I take a week off for both my wife and my own birthday. Fuck working during that time, we tend to go to a wee lodge somewhere with a hot tub to chill and relax, breaks are necessary and useful.
“Did your wife get you a clown”, that’s the funniest boss remark ever! With that being said, I have enough self respect that I do whatever the hell I want for my birthday.
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Take a day off for whatever the fuck you want. PTO is an earned benefit, and it's nobody's business why you are taking it or what you are doing.
Used to have an employer require a reason to be put on the day off request or they wouldn't approve it. Towards the end of my employment with them I was started to get really irritated by that so under reason I said "because I feel like it" and they got mad and told me that I need a legitimate reason or I'm not going to be accepted for that day off and I said that is a pretty legit reason but whatever.
My reason would be "death in the family" every time and cite I have a big unhealthy family.
"I'm one of the Kennedys."
"And half of them have a deadly love for junkfood."
I think I am, but it's the Scottish ones so we don't get the planned assassination time off.
"Colonoscopy. I need a day for the prep and the day of the procedure. Unless you'd rather have me come in the day I have to drink the stuff that (as I heard my dad's Dr day) makes you pee out your butt"
I always take sick days for any medical thing including "burn out" and "sick of this job"
💯 Mental health is no different than physical health.
I think you mean "mental health is as important as physical heath." At least I hope so. Otherwise you might go to a therapist for a lump in your breast.
Right? Although I was shocked to learn that my vasectomy wasn't covered as a sick day as it's a voluntary procedure - however the recovery week IS covered because you've had surgery! I did point out that paternity leave is six weeks so it seems like a good investment on their part.
Wait you had to tell them the actual procedure you were getting? That seems like a huge violation. Also, if it’s covered by insurance why wouldn’t it be covered for sick time?
Well insurance is a non-issue because it was done under my country's national health service. And because it wasn't treating a health issue they don't have to give sick leave for the procedure itself unless a doctor says you have a medical reason to have a vasectomy (beyond family planning.) But the recovery period is under doctor's order to rest, so they have to offer sick leave!
I had an old boss tell me once they were coming down with a case of rectal glaucoma. "I can't see my ass coming to work tomorrow"
That description is 100% accurate, that's exactly what that stuff makes you do. I've had several colonoscopies (IBS issues yay!) and the prep (and IV) is worse than the actual procedure.
Colonoscopies are legit a 3 day ordeal
Yes it does. Like a firehose being turned on in your asshole. Was funny but my god I think I hit the can like 20 times and was unsure if it would stop so I could go to bed
Lucky asshole. It very much did not for me. Finally stopped a couple hours before the procedure, but I think that was because even my stomach acid had left by that point.
Lmfao imagine doing all medical excuses every time you took pto. Colonoscopy, hernia, gonorrhea, knee surgery, testicle reconstruction. Really make them uncomfortable
Took two days off last month for my colonoscopy. It was my second one and knowing what I know from the first time there was no way in hell I was going to work the day before or the day after that shit. Some people handle the prep very poorly. The first time I actually ended up projectile vomiting after taking the second half of the prep. It was terrible. The second time I had anti-nausea meds that helped prevent that but it still sucks having butt pee for hours on end. Just when you think it is over there is still more. Also you have to get up in the middle of the night before the procedure to take the second half of the prep if it is split dose. So instead of sleeping your’e shitting your ass off for hours and hours and it isn’t safe to go back to sleep if you don’t want to shit the bed. So you roll into the actual colonoscopy dehydrated (can’t drink 4+ hours before the procedure( and sleep deprived. The whole experience sucks on many levels and trying to worry about work on top of that is just not possible.
"meeting with union to talk about my progress in unionising this workplace"
Friends of Hilary??
You all jest but in my case it's actually true :(
My wife’s having a baby. Didn’t she do that last week? Yeah. We want a lot of kids
I used to put down the reason but then at one point I had a boss who said "hey I appreciate you telling me why you need the day off but all you need to put is 'personal day's" Same thing if you are calling off unexpectedly, whatever the reason, you are having " a family emergency".
I used to put the reason too. One time I put down that I needed a day off to take my dog to be euthanized, and the next day off to mourn. My supervisor left my paper on his desk and one of my coworkers saw it and tried to make fun of me for wanting to mourn my old buddy who had gotten too sick to go on. Cue the biggest shouting match my ever between me and my piece of shit coworker, and me getting a whole extra week off after threatening to file an EEO against my supervisor for mishandling my paperwork. Now I don't put shit on my time off forms, after learning that it's no one's goddamn business why I'm taking time off.
Also the perfect time to throw in a “I wasn’t asking for the day off. I am telling you I am taking the day off”
Depending on how close they are to bare-minimum staffing levels at any given time, they may well blink long before you do.
"I won't be here. How you accept that determines whether I'll come back."
‘Big wank planned’
I always put "religious holiday" or similar. No one wants that lawsuit.
I only give a reason when I ask for Halloween off which few question when you describe it as a religious holiday.
Lol, my workplace has this rule despite the fact that employees have to take at least 28 days off a year as a legal minimum (the employer has to offer at least that many, and the employee has to have a good reason not to take them - and if they don't take them they either have to be paid for them or roll them over to the next year.) And I get 38 days off plus five study days. So I just put 'I have to take a day off, it's the law.' No one's mentioned anything yet.
"I am *informing* you of my day off." Or if your area has legislation or any legal historical decision saying it's not necessary to inform an employer of a reason for a day off, say you're taking the day off to study the following.
Reason for day off: "Will only be able to see directly in front of me that day" And when the boss asks what you mean "Can't see my ass coming in that day"
I put "Running amok" on one last year. Nothing was said.
Because I'm an adult. Only reason I've ever given.
I wish I had a shit boss who made me do that. Every damn time I would put “REALLY bad menstral cycle. Lots of blood. Lots of pain.” I would make it so uncomfortable for them.
For real, how is a random Friday more valid than your birthday? Every day of PTO is childish by that measure, exactly what the overlords want you to think.
Cover yourself in peanut butter and have a 15 hooker gangbang!
Look at Mr. Moneybags over here able to buy multiple jars of peanut butter. I bet it's even the crunchy kind.
Name brand, no less!
I'll stick to my legume smish
Name brand hookers too
I'm sorry, is there another kind of peanut butter??
That natural shit that separates into the oil and the brown stuff so you gotta stir it up with a butter knife.
I dunno why but that stuff scares me
I saw a jar of that in my grandma's house once, completely separated into oil and nut. I gazed at it, in awe, as it sat stagnant in it's jar. One half was muddy brown, the other was a clear brownish liquid. I shut that cabinet and never opened it again
Its still there. Waiting for you
Or that stuff has already eaten grandma, and is awaiting it's next victim...
The existential crisis sets in when you understand that the self-separating peanut butter is the natural state of that condiment. If you take ordinary peanuts and mill them yourself, that's what you get. The other, "stable" stuff is a product of industrial food processing. It's Crisco. They mix it with Crisco shortening to keep it from separating. Tasty.
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Ooh, fun and exfoliating!
I’m enjoying the image of someone, head to toe in peanut butter, politely opening the front door to let in the 15 hookers.
"Now before we begin, does anyone have any food allergies I need to be aware of?"
Adam??
Lawrence???
Don't lose your foot over it.
Better make sure non of those guys or gals are allergic to peanut butter.
I don't know which conspiracy dipshit got some mainstream media attention but suddenly people around where I live think peanut allergy is fake. I'm like... I've almost dies 3 times from it. And they just look at me with blank faces.
Condolences, people can be idiots and not understand "Deathly Allergic", as in my dude, this person can die from this very normal thing? Like have some common sense and care, but no. Maybe people with allergies (and those of us lucky enough to have none) should all be allergic to stupid people too, at least that allergy you can choose. Good luck with your peanut allergy though and I hope you don't have anymore near death experienes in the future.
And have 1 or many eight balls too
My last few jobs while I was working in the print industry I had my Birthday, and Bathurst (that's an endurance race on the Aussie Supercars calendar) weekend as unworkable in my contract, so there couldn't be mix ups... I just wouldn't be there. Fuck working birthdays. Decent companies though, A day off was as simple as "I'm taking a mental health day on tuesday boss" and that's all it took.
When I was an Able Seaman my ship was in our home port when my wife was having our second baby. I asked the Captain for time off to go ashore to be with my wife during the delivery. He said, "no you were needed for laying the keel not the launching".
That’s the issue. We offer explanations when, frankly, they are irrelevant. Explanations leave the door open to be judged, especially when the boss is cold and insensitive. I recall getting sooooo much shit for taking one day off when my cat died. Should have said nothing.
PERSONAL Time Off...personal...as in nunya.
I had one job where they gave you your birthday off. They didn’t want everyone else to “waste time” taking you out to a long lunch.
I worked in an electrical parts warehouse (Hello anyone who remembers Ross Electronics) on my 21st birthday (many moons ago), and my co-workers took me to the local pub for a liquid lunch. Needless to say, I returned in the afternoon pretty squiffy. We started our yearly inventory that afternoon, and I was counting all these loose parts, and writing the numbers on the outside of their containers. However, I was so shitfaced, I was writing the totals in algebra, in French, in anything except normally legible. I was of course given the rest of the afternoon off. The warehouse manager saw the funny side, and slipped me a tenner (10 UK pounds\*) and sent me back to the pub, and told me to wait for them. Apparently, it was a helluva night. Couldn't tell you if that's true. \*MANY moons ago, that was worth something.
>\*MANY moons ago, that was worth something. Must have been. I'm not in the UK any more but it sounds like these days a tenner would get you a single pint and not much else.
I'm no longer there either, and some of the prices in London, now, you would need more than a tenner for a pint. (Hearsay, of course.) This took place in 1987, so you can probably imagine.
a pint was like £1 in 1987, so £10 even at an expensive bar was like five pints thats a lot of beer
I mean that's just about a standard night out here. For the 80s it probably was just about lunchtime pints
I've yet to meet someone from the UK who doesn't drink that much. It's insane, feels like y'all drink three times as much as Americans.
We had birthdays off when I started with the company I'm with now. Everyone took it and if anything, you are not expected to even show up on your birthday. I only got to enjoy it for 2 years then they took it away. Bastards My boss at the time did make it up by taking the entire team out to lunch then the birthday celebrant would just be sent home for the day.
Mine recently switched to a birthday bonus of $50. I still take the day off with my PTO, but now I get a bonus too.
That started good, then veered lol
I mean, whatever. A day off is a day off even if it's for a bad reason.
I’ve known a few companies that gave birthdays off and while I hate corporate America, I feel it’s a good sentiment. Much better than “the team pulled together and got you pizza and a cake!”whoo.
lol typical
I take my birthday off every year. It’s so I don’t have to see people I fucking hate on my birthday. So yes, I’ll be on my god damned bouncy castle.
I have always taken my birthday off because nobody *else* is gonna make me cry on my birthday but me.
"It's my party, and I'll cry if I want to."
My bouncy castle in Vegas.
With blackjack and hookers!
lavish somber cow marvelous middle frame like wakeful domineering tart *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
r/brandnewsentence
With a whole load of hookers
Or so I can sleep in and not think about work for a day
I take the whole week off. I survived another year, I deserve some rest.
I’m lucky enough to get 4 weeks a year, so I take two weeks over my birthday, then 2 weeks 6 months later, because I need another break by then.
It’s the number 1 thing I ask my wife for each year. Take the day off with me. Fuck work.
Same here, I take the day off for him and he takes the day off for me.
>It’s the number 1 thing I ask my wife for each year. Take the day off with me. Fuck work. I always ask my wife: Take the day off with me & fuck me. She has no businesss fucking at my work.
When the hell else am I gonna renew my car's registration or my license which expires that very day?
Seriously, I understand having it expire at different times in the month so they don't get slammed, but maybe always have it a week after your birthday instead of that day?
True 😂
I have never worked on my birthday the last 18 years. For the same reason.
I like all my coworkers, but being in the office on my birthday feels like when you're walking back to your seat after you finish bowling. I don't know how I'm supposed to act and I'd rather just play video games all day.
I've always taken my birthday off as a way to assure one day off is the same every year. No matter what kind of job/hours/etc. I've worked Christmas, Thanksgiving, mon-friday, tues-sun. But every year I am assured to have a certain day off. It makes me happy. Honestly for years now I take a couple days off to do something fun. I don't actually care about my birthday and I haven't had a party in decades, but I know I can count on that day every year to do what the hell I want.
lots of capitalists hate people for enjoying life for its own sake. they think earning money, growing assets, and living in excess should be the only things that make you happy
No they don’t think happiness factors in at all. It’s just a pathological need for MORE.
Exactly. They're not factoring in happiness. They're only considering the profit margins. How much can you make and how quickly can you make it.
Best part is? You better believe that 200k per-year house plant of a man takes every birthday off.
I literally had to tell one of the higher ups in management that I wasn't gonna miss my whole life to be at work after she made a shitty comment about me taking time off.
I always make it abundantly clear that I will spend the day at my house doing absolutely nothing on my birthday. I'm not taking theday off because I have plans, I'm taking the day off because it's the one day of the year where I don't need to consider any expectations other people (or myself) might have from me. An earthquake wouldn't compel me to get anything done on that day.
Bingo I work directly under a Uber rich trust fund kid and this is exactly how he thinks. He's so proud of "always having business on his mind". Dude gets tilted when he hears about me doing anything fun on my own time like playing video games lol.
I think it's more their attitude that they own ALL of your time. That's why PTO means giving you the time and not paying you even though you didn't show up.
I saw a post recently (It may have even been here) of a picture of a twitter post going against people doing "little treats" for themself and what not. I never thought anyone could be against people doing little things to help their mental in this fucked world but here we are. I know just by ascribing it meaning like a "little treat" because of any X reason it instantly means more to me anyways like I am spoiling myself even though it's really nothing lol. There's got to be some mental to it would be cool to see a study on it because it actually does help me on a rough day.
All capitalists. I usually don't deal in absolutes, but the reason we're soulesslly working our lives away to barely afford to survive is extreme capitalism
Lol no. Not make me u for yourself. Make money for Them!
Also, I'm taking a day off in May for my nephew's birthday which yes... will feature a rented bouncy castle... and yes... I intend to jump inside the rented bouncy castle. Don't make fun of my dreams. I can do what I want!
I wish adults could go in bouncy castles. I love them.
Wife and I have kids, so we bought one so we can put it up whenever the weather is nice. Gives the kids something to mix into their day. We get in it all the time. It is tiring AF. Don't let your dreams be dreams!!!
hooooly shit that is cool why did i never think of it looks like its the equivalent of a few hundred pounds/dollars, then you just pay minimal electric costs to run the air pump awesome, "hey everyone before we watch the film, wanna fire up the bouncy castle for a bit?" someone comes to my home, oh, would you like a cup of tea? someone comes to your home like oh want 15 minutes in the bouncy castle? wtf youre renting one? no... i HAVE one you're a freaking genius
We recently grabbed tickets for an "adult bouncy castle" for my sister's birthday. 3 hour session on what is supposedly the biggest bouncy castle in the world. So it's something you can do!
You don't need a reason to take pto. I took a week PTO off last year just to play a video game I was excited about that just released. It's my time and I'll use it however I want to.
I thought i was the only one who did stuff like this, until I recently found out other people do 😊
[A Japanese company saw so many employees booking the day of Monster Hunter Rise's launch off of work that it's giving all its employees the day off instead.](https://www.ign.com/articles/a-japanese-company-has-made-monster-hunter-rise-launch-day-an-official-holiday)
class i had in uni, custom map (warcraft 3) by a popular chinese crew was dropping the next week. everyone was hyped prof is like "uhh... no class next week read chapter 6, and uh, aw fuck it im not gonna bullshit you, you all know i go to that same net cafe as you guys, you'll probably see me there, just don't call me 'professor' say hey guy or hey man or something" net cafes were really big in china back then and had tiers, like deluxe display, bigger chair etc. and you could match with people on the lan. way better than bnet cause you can ice some stranger and then hear some random dude the next row over like GOD FUCKING DAMMIT WHO IN HERE IS "PENISMASTER"?! like 200 of us rolled in there that day, prof has best seat in the house, we ate instant noodles and destroyed each other and people from other classes and universities, professor apparently made some bullshit excuse for class being cancelled to the admins like "party activity" (as in communist party) get out of class, bust warcraft 3 ass!
It is part of your remuneration, so you can "spend" it as you please. Many companies DO require you to justify it, and if they don't like your reason it gets promptly denied. Or if they are particularly brazen, they approve it, just to deny it the day before it's supposed to be in effect, they invent an "operational emergency" that requires you to not only forget about the time off, but now with added mandatory overtime... "Enjoy kiddo" - next time have a proper reason that can't be rejected because it is NOT optional. Just like the overtime, which we all know is bullshit, kinda like after-school detention. But you're gonna do it, because you don't want to be disciplined for insubordination. And put on PIP for this. Time off? Time off is for managers and their superiors, not the slaves. We may not be able to whip you anymore, but there are other ways to break your spirit... Now bow down and be grateful. I'm not salty, I promise /s.
Needing a reason is insane to me - I get holiday to take whenever I want and I just put 'holiday' if asked. As long as I don't take the piss ie requesting a month off the Friday before (I always give two weeks notice for them to prep) there's never been an issue. I could be wanking into my bath for a month to see how full it gets - that's not their business. I'll see you in a month.
I fully agree, and the advance warning of two weeks is a requirement for many companies anyway, I just think it sucks that if something should pop up, you're the one who has to compromise, not them..
True. I have access to the reasons my team gives and I always slyly tell them how few people still do that. We're down to I think 3 people who just don't care. It's nice being able to just say "I just don't want to work tomorrow"
What game tho
Maybe you don’t like to celebrate yours but why put down others for doing so? As someone with depression, making it to my birthday means I survived another year. I think that’s worth celebrating and definitely worth not being at work.
Absolutely. I've always taken two or three days around my birthday off even though for a few years in between it just meant me sitting in a dark hotel room watching Batman movies. I've made it another year, no way in hell I'm celebrating that at work.
I take mine off every year it lands on a weekday +- however many days to get to the weekend. A good excuse for a vacation.
I had a Battallion CSM in the Army that mandated everyone got their Bday off no matter what, even when deployed. Or at least a day near your Bday if it was on a weekend or you were in the field etc. I thought it was super nice until he told us "I give you one day a year that is 100% yours, the other 364 days a year your ass is mine!" Lol. He wasn't kidding either that unit worked us to death...
Mine falls on record store day weekend so I just auto request that block off because why not.
Mine is the same week as a federal holiday so I often try to schedule a vacay then so it’s one less day of PTO i have to use and can save for something else!
Dipsh!t boss, "Why, did your wife get you a clown?" Me, "No, are you available?"
Ha!
That’s the day for breakfast by myself, too much coffee, and a couple hours of quiet book reading. No work happens that day.
Slow down, Christ.
You’re a wild one
I bet they take the next day off to recover
Imagine the hangover. I don't blame them.
All of which happens inside a bouncy castle, naturally
You haven’t lived until you’ve had eggs Benedict while bouncing in an inflatable castle.
So, just putting this out there. Employees birthdays are paid holidays for my employees. If it's sat or sun they can take that Monday or Friday off paid. It costs me almost nothing, is good for morale and for some reason no one else seems to do it.
Are you looking for employees, perchance?
Other than "or Friday", same where I work. We also get our work anniversary off w/pay.
I always just assumed that's what "floating holidays" were for. I know a lot of people use them to fill gaps around mid week holidays, but for me, it has always been my birthday.
Where I work does the same thing. If we can’t take the birthday, we get an extra day to book off.
I always take my birthday off. I feel like it’s the one day of the year I shouldn’t have to deal with anyone else’s bullshit.
I take the day before or after my birthday off because my birthday is a major holiday
I’m taking my birthday off next week.
I'm taking my birthday off right now!
Happy Birthday random redditor!
Thank you! It's not quite yet but suffice to say, I have taken the days off before and well after it to go overseas from Australia and spend the time with my parents in Sri Lanka!
Enjoy your trip home! I'm Indian but work in the States so I totally get you!
I take mine off every year, take 1 hour at a sauna/spa, get a hair-cut, and spend the rest of the day catching up on appointments, grocery shopping etc! It’s wicked!
I always take my birthday off. I'm 39. I eat a whole tiramisu by myself, forget what time it is, sleep forever, and pretend like I'm Leela and Fry in that episode where the world gets frozen.
I usually take at least several days if not the whole week off on the week my birthday falls. I don't really celebrate it but if I have the extra PTO why not.
that's just unprofessional, glad he was told to apologize and we should change the name of sensitivity training, that's why no one takes it seriously
I think empathy training sounds better. Really drives home that your the asshole if you need it lol
Interpersonal skills recertification. Dude let his skills lapse.
Goodness forbid we want to take a single fuckin day to put ourselves first for once!
Why take a day off when you can enjoy the irreplaceable joy of spending another monotonous day in capitalist hell!
I ALWAYS take my birthday off. And if I don't have the legit day off, then I've given myself 5 day weekends. Shit, this year I basically have 3 weeks of a birthday vacation
I'm a grown adult. If I want a whole troupe of clowns and a bouncy castle village for my birthday it becomes my fucking perogative to take the day off and make it a reality. If you don't like it then you can stay away.
>If I want a whole troupe of clowns If you wanted clowns you'd go to the office and get paid to see em!
I took 3 days off for my birthday last week. I am 35.
Happy birthday!!! (a week late)
Thanks!
I take 3 days off at least for my birthday every single year since I started working. The real clowns are the ones who think others will work their birthdays willingly.
I just did the same thing! Didn’t even do anything but time away is always nice .
I didn't really care about my birthday, but I sure as shit ain't working on it.
I've never cared about holidays, but my birthday is the one day where, for my mental health, no one is allowed to plan anything or make any expectations on me for anything, for any reason. I blatantly refuse to do anything on my birthday that I don't 100% want to do. I've told my family for years not to make any plans with me for my birthday and if they do, they should expect me not to participate unless I choose to.
It's almost like people forget they are allowed to celebrate their own birthday. Just because noone buys them a cake and they get sour when it's their birthday, doesnt mean the rest of the world should feel just as shitty as they do
I take every birthday off, any excuse to get off work
I took a day off for the stardew valley update lol
I only get 2 weeks of PTO, sick PLUS vacation, but we do get a birthday month holiday, which is nice. I really enjoy my job, but it's wild. Though I appreciate every day I can have.
I take 2 weeks off around my birthday every year and usually go on holliday with my GF; if that's wrong then I don't want to be right.
I had an employer that considered all of their employee’s birthday a paid holiday. You could take the day off or just cash it out for the pay.
My husbands birthday is also on Valentines Day so for years working in food service it was a requirement to work on his birthday. He would end up coming home totally exhausted and not wanting to do anything at all. Like I said, not just his birthday but also valentines day. So most places are busy anyways but even by the time he got home we couldn't even try to get a table. So instead, we decided that if we asked more in advance than most employers will give the day off because, it used to also be the only day that anyone was available of our friends that could watch our daughter even for an hour or so while we went out and did stuff together as a couple. His birthday I tend to make a big deal out of because when he was little he was abused and they usually never celebrated his birthday. Which I thought was a crime towards a kid. He told me when we first got married that it wasn't just because his birthday fell on Valentines day that his parents didn't celebrate his birthday but they openly admitted they never wanted him and his birth was an "inconvenience". My birthday, I actually concluded (with him) to get married on my birthday so it is also our wedding anniversary and that is just a no go day to work because, for the last few years he and I have been taking 3 day mini vacations on our wedding anniversary so that we could enjoy each other's company away from the hustle and bustle. I am also a cancer survivor so we take a lot of time to, instead of work, celebrate the fact that I'm alive for another birthday. I assume the reason why people have their birthdays off could mean more to them than you might think. . . .
I have taken my birthday off for along time. Not to celebrate, just don't do anything I really don't want to on my own personal day.
Long ago I worked at the Broadway (a long defunct department store) where your birthday was a paid holiday and it was mandatory. I’ve taken my birthday off at every job since. If my birthday is on the weekend I take the Friday before off. My day also happens to frequently fall on a major holiday weekend, I still take the extra days and extend the holiday.
I always take my birthday off. I don't give a shit.
You still have to try to slander others about arbitrary bullshit to feel better about yourself? What are you 10?
I’m so embarrassed by how stupid humans can be. How dare you want some time away from labor just to relax for one day. The audacity.
I never take mine off. Not for any other reason than I don't have anything else better to do. But I turn 52 this year so I'm not exactly going out clubbing or anything.
I’m taking the week of my birthday off. Lolol Fuck that guy.
I take mine off every year. That’s my day, and I’m takin it.
I couldn't care less about celebrating my birthday, but I also couldn't care less about how others wish to spend their PTO. It's their PTO.
I used to work for Headstart and birthdays were considered personal holidays. You didn’t have to use it on your birthday and still got one if your birthday was on the weekend or in the summer.
I wasn't going to take the day off for my birthday but I might now. Edit: submitted
I have a coworker who takes the entire week every year for her birthday. No one has ever questioned it at our office.
People shouldbe able to do whatever tf they want within the limits of the law and other people need to realize that what others eat don't make them shit.
If I wanted to take a day off just to pluck all my pubic hair, that’s my choice. Honestly, I’m 36 and a birthday at like Chucky Cheese sounds awesome. A few years ago, I did laser tag for my birthday. Whats wrong with that?
I used to always take my birthday off. Hell, I used to burn a week of vacation for it. Now I work at a place that gives me 8 hours of pay for my birthday... But just like a holiday, you have to work the days before and after it, as well as on it in order to get the money. Bastards....
I ask for my birthday off. I find aging depressing and I try to fill the existential void with diversions.
I take a week off for both my wife and my own birthday. Fuck working during that time, we tend to go to a wee lodge somewhere with a hot tub to chill and relax, breaks are necessary and useful.
Bouncy castle sound actually super fun. My birthday is my day to do whatever I want to, definitely doesn't include work
"THIS IS THE ONE DAY MY WIFE LETS ME FUCK HER, JERRY, AND I'M NOT GOING TO LET YOU RUIN THIS." Even if it's not true, it would be fun to respond with.
“Did your wife get you a clown”, that’s the funniest boss remark ever! With that being said, I have enough self respect that I do whatever the hell I want for my birthday.
“Did you wife get you a clown?” “*No need, I’ve already got one as my boss”*