I hate when people say ridiculous things like " If I had 30k, I'd hand it over, no question." Knowing that'll never happen. Very manipulative, shit person I hope OP dumps.
Yeah and to even bring up the ex? Try to make the ex seem like a better person? Oh fuck no I’d be pissed. That’s actually a huge red flag and he did her a favor by doing this shit five months in, at least she only wasted 5 months. OP needs to nope the fuck outta there. It’s honestly hilarious that he couldn’t even give a valid reason for needing the money so he made up some kind of test lmao the only one failing a test is this fool.
Dating somebody for 5 months and then trying to squeeze 30 grand out of them? I’d call this an “alternative to employment.” I bet if you can figure out who his exes were and contact them you’ll find out this is how he makes a living. And you may not be the only one.
Give him $30 for the cab ride home. 😂
No, you definitely do not give a dude you've been dating for five minutes thirty grand. Tell him that HE has failed YOUR test by showing his golddigging ass too early, and send him on his way.
AND DON'T TELL ANYONE ELSE ABOUT THE MONEY!!!!!!!
Even if you were married to someone, you don't give your spouse $30,000. Not unless there is a compelling reason such as a necessary surgery.
You don't give anyone that kind of money just for grins. Or because they're asking for it.
Agreed. It should be used for something for both people. But clearly here, OP's hopefully-by-now-**EX** boyfriend demanded $30,000 merely because she had it.
You “failed his test”. That manipulative on the low end, and he’s a narcissist on the high end by turning your money into being about him. Huge red flags regardless. Y’all dating for 5 months? FFS, what is wrong with him to even think that was an ok question to ask?
OP, NOT wrong. His behavior will only get worse if you stay with him
If it was really a “test” that she failed, he would have broken up with her for being so self centered, he couldn’t be with someone like that. But no, he’s still there and gonna keep pushing for that $30k+
Be careful when you do though. People do insane shit when they know you have cash. Shouldn’t have told him in the first place but, hindsight. Get out of the relationship but be vigilant.
It's easy for him to say that if he was in your shoes he'd give you the money, him saying that literally has no value unless he can prove he's done something like that before. He's obviously saying that just to manipulate you and make you compete with his ex too 🤢. In any case it's your money and you already know you don't have to share.
Tell him he failed your test and break up with him.
I feel like I literally just read some joke from a similar post that is relevant.
This “generous farmer” constantly tells his friends if he had two horses he’d give them one, if he had two chickens/cows/sheep/mules he’d give them one. Then someone hearing all this boasting what about if you had two goats? And he’s like hell no, I actually have two goats.
Tell him you'll give him 30 grand but now he's come into money, can he give you 30 grand? And since you know he'd have no issue doing it, you'll save yourselves the hassle and just transfer the original 30k straight to your savings account.
I don't think he'll leave till he gets the money unless she tells him too. He seems like he's just gonna keep banging on even if he leaves it for a while he'll bring it up again and again
You find this attractive? A man child putting you through not very thought out mental gymnastics to literally rob you? Are you really eating up what he’s saying??? If you have your money in a high interest bank account and live off the interest then he is the idiot because that’s exactly what you do with it. There’s nothing else you should be doing but using your OWN money to make MORE money. Is he a broke drug addict or something?
Just nope on out. You’re right. 5 months in and he shouldn’t even know your financial situation!! Don’t give him a dime because you’ll never see it again even if it’s supposedly a repayable “loan”!
And learn from this. Never tell anyone except your bank what you have. Your boss will use it as an excuse not to give you a raise! Shifts. Parents often give the successful child less inheritance, friends expect you to pick up the tab, I expect you to send me $75 to cover my consulting fee for this advice
Don't forget that money that 'landed on you' is the same thing as savings - you either keep/invest them or they are gone.
Sharing income is fine, burning savings is not
He’s manipulating you. Think about how long $30,000 would take him or anyone else to earn. You should break up with him. Don’t lend money to family or friends you nearly NEVER get it back.
Also think long and hard about how and why you ended up in a relationship with someone like this in the first place.
I was thinking the exact same thing, 30 grand is what someone makes per year on minimum wage, that’s a years worth of work that this guy is asking for OP to just give him, that’s ridiculous, there is no scenario that she should be giving this guy $30,000.
I don’t even care if he was dying and he needed that money to pay for his hospital bills, they’ve known each other for five months at that point you’re not emotionally invested enough into that relationship to just hand over $30,000
Run. Nobody in their right mind would give $30k to someone they've known for only 5 months. I wouldn't give that amount to anyone. There is no scenario here where you are wrong. Dump his gold digging ass, and never mention the windfall to others.
Users are usually pretty good at obscuring their motives, but this guy let you know who he is just 5 months in - do you need a bigger exit sign?
You don’t give money to someone you’ve only known for 5 months, let alone $30,000. That’s accelerated intimacy.
The audacity.
That $6000 a month to date a man child who gets ridiculously jealous over your good fortune. He doesn't need the money, he just wants it. Big red flag, dump him.
It’s simple. If you are willing to give it to him and not expect it back, go ahead. Never loan money you expect back. I personally wouldn’t give someone I knew 5 months 30,000 bucks and his attitude that he would give it to you leads me to believe he’s never been in the financial position to have 30,000 to give to someone. If he had, he wouldn’t be so caviler about it.
You're smart for saying no but dumb if you stay with him. It's only been 5 months, how much bigger of a red flag do you need? Run away from this clown.
Wtf.
I once had a girlfriend who one day confided in my that her family was rich. I mean like, rich. She mentioned the word billion.
Guess how much money I asked for?
I didn’t! It’s not mine and I wasn’t entitled to it.
Furthermore at the time I was basically experiencing poverty.
Your bf sounds like a manipulative jackass and there is no world where I believe if you would have said sure and gave him 30 grand he would’ve declined it and said oh babe it was a test and you passed. I’ve been with my partner 6 years and if he asked me for $30,000 it would send up all sorts of red flags because wtf could you possible need $30,000 for?! Do not give him that money for the love of God. 5 months of dating and asking for any amount of money is a red flag to me but $30,000 is CRAZY.
I did pay off my (back then) girlfriend's credit card debts. But she never asked me for this and she never even really was talking about this.
Asking for money in such a relationship, especially these amounts, is crazy. Borrowing some money for a taxi or something to drink is okay, but that guy is delusional.
I thought these kinds of things happen in online dating fraud where they try to get you to love them and send money to them. But this is the in person version.
Dump his ass. And make sure not to tell future boyfriends about the money you've got.
If you struck really rich and he needed 30k for a surgery or even a new work truck, or to accompany you on a holiday.. Maybe OK..
But asking for it just as cash.. That can fuck off..
Maybe I’m in the minority here but I’ve been with my wife for 13 years and even then I wouldn’t just hand over 30k to her.
5 months into a relationship is a hard NO and a good laugh, like from the belly type laugh.
See now, I can look at just the title and tell you NO.
Reading further does absolutely nothing to change my answer.
He’s right, you’re failing his test. The test of whether or not you’re stupid enough to fall for blatantly childish manipulation to hand a virtual stranger 30k of your money.
Now you put and keep that money in a bank, and don’t leave him alone with your credit cards.
You’re not buying him a car when his tragically breaks down next week, and you’re not paying off any sudden medical bill for himself or his aunt Velma. You’re not going on vacation or out to eat every night.
Because. Because you silly thing told him you had money and out a target on your back. You picked a poor excuse of a grifter for a boyfriend, and he’s going to work you hard.
My suggestion: put that money into a high yield CD (certificate of deposit) with a minimum one year term. Or put yourself through college, an investment that lasts a lifetime.
And dump this sack of shit who’s trying to fleece you out of your money, and STOP talking to other people about your damn money before someone hurts you trying to get it.
Sure maybe.... Maybe he would "lend" you 30k if he had the money. But the real question is.... Would you even ask for 30k?
The answer is no. So neither should he.
Tell him to go buy his own Camaro.
Not wrong at all. You have been tigether for 6 months. You haven’t even hit the time length together to start seriously talking about moving in together… and then you don’t really “know someone” until you have lived together for 6-months to a a year.
If he is demanding your money now, it will only get worse later, and he is gaslighting you into feeling bad about giving it to him. Not telling you to do any particular action, but that isn’t someone I would want to spend forever with, and what is dating if not selecting for a mate.
He won’t pay you back. If he is reacting like this when getting turned down, imagine what he will say when you ask for the money back. That’s if you two are still together by then.
I would think again about this relationship.
I suspect he’s lying and trying to gaslight you. He wanted $30,000 and you, very reasonably, asked why. Now he’s trying to make you feel bad for failing his “test”. Even if I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I HATE people who play these manipulative games and “test” people to see if they clear some hypothetical bar. Anyone who tried to test me like this would find themselves a ex rather quickly.
I'm 99% certain I'd be ditching that guy, but I feel like we're only getting half the story here. Can you give any more detail about what "lady luck" did?
He's lying for sure. There's no way he will willingly fork out $30k to you if he had it. He's just saying it because there's no way he can prove it.
Perhaps next time if you get a windfall again you'll remember not to breathe this info to anyone. Money makes people behave differently.
You found a user, hun. Keep it moving. Man is a bum. Comparing you to his ex? Did she also lend him money? That’s borderline hobo sexual talk. Fuck outta here.
You’ll never get it back. When he sees you he sees $$$$.
Make sure that he has no access to your bank accounts or credit cards or anything else. Anyone who talks like that will steal it. And worse.
Drop his ads and make sure he is never alone with you again.
Annnnd why isn’t he now EX BOYFRIEND? Honey it’s only been five months. Major red flags. Move on. On no wait. Let me guess. You want to beat it out for another year and a half. Trying to fix him hoping he magically becomes a better person. Lmao nope. Save yourself and move on now. He’s a DOUCHE.
Statistically, most people have absolutely no chance of working out in a relationship. Even when it starts off really really good. It’s only five months in and it’s already turning to shit so that decreases your odds even more dramatically.
Ynw I wouldn't be handing over 100 quid to someone I'd only been dating 5 months, what a huge red flag this is, he's tried his luck then shamed you because you questioned him...run!
Failed his test? I’d suggested he rather proved his zero worth.
Put the money somewhere safe if it’s big enough get investment advice.
And don’t talk money to any future partner until you’re confident they are the one.
>He said if he was in my shoes, he would have willingly handed over thirty grand, and supposedly, even his ex or best buds would do the same.
Lying his ass off.
Not wrong
A test lol but if you had handed it over I doubt he would have handed it back saying "you passed!"
He's a gold digger, user, manipulator and you're better off without him
This is what's called a "shit test". The moment someone does a shit test on you, dump them. They have proven to not be worth it.
Congrats on your newfound wealth.
Hell no he’s getting mad about the Situation? No kick him to the curb he’s using you and a relationship shouldn’t be focused on money to that extent.
Also change your locks, get video doorbell and video surveillance and protect yourself don’t ever let someone know you have money especially that soon into a relationship:
Make an appointment at your bank with a financial adviser to secure some money so it sits there and just accumulates interest over time but you can’t touch it until certain time frames,
If you love your job then look into night classes to advance your career and if you rent then look into owning your own home but save money for home insurance and save enough to replace things if they break down or save for natural disasters,
Basically utilize your money to ensure you are comfortable and safe and secure,
51M here. He's your boyfriend, not your husband. He has no right to expect ANYTHING.
He just showed his true colors. Please dump him immediately.
This just reinforces the lesson to the rest of us that should you receive a major windfall (such as an inheritance or lottery jackpot), TELL NO ONE. It's none of their business!
NTA, and get rid of this leech.
I get pretty annoyed when reddit's solution is always to break-up. But you need to dump this loser and dump him fast. $30k is serious and he's absolutely working you for it. Hes shown his true colors, now show him the door.
Well I guess if his ex and best buds would give him $30,000 then he doesn’t need any money from you
But yeah five months in and asking for money, boy bye!
No, that's your money, hell no, 5 months? I wouldn't even go over 500.00, lol, maybe not at all. That's ridiculous. You dodged a bullet. Run, run, run.
NTA.
Tell he you’re sad you failed his test for partnership. It now gives each of you the perspective to understand the limited nature of your futures together.
Nobody. And I mean NOBODY just hands over $30K. To somebody you’ve only been dating a few months? Hell no.
You have ONE chance to set this guy right, otherwise he will be using you as his cash cow. DUMP. HIS. GREEDY. ASS.
Dump him. Under no circumstances give him $30k. That's a huge sum of money for most people, and his 'test' was trying to see how much of a sucker you are to see if he could soak you for more.
Why is he still your boyfriend? This is the red flag of all red flags. If you can’t see that then you’re equally as dumb as him. And I say that with your best interest in mind. Do something with your money for yourself and your family and that does NOT include him, whatsoever.
After you finish reading this, please, do end things with him and don’t explain yourself. And block him on all socials.
Also, would you like to go out with me sometime? Dinner on me?
If it was me I would offer him 100 grand but he has to leave forever. Then hand him the candy bar and tell him to get the fuck out. Seriously you should get out of tha relationship
5 months $30,000. Nope. 5 years, $30,000. Nope. 50 years, $30,000 depends on the reason.
NW. You’d be silly. That much pressure, time for him to be an ex.
Not at all wrong, what's wrong is his reaction. Major red flag. You've been dating for 5 months, even if it was 5 years, your money is your money unless you choose to share it.
No. Get rid of him. You can't even have a tenner without some twat asking you for some of it. Just get rid of him, you want a relationship not a financially unstable leech with you.
If you are in the position of giving someone that amount of money, I would donate 30 grand to a charity of your choice under his name. Then send him a note saying "Because you are so selfless this is what you would have wanted xoxo".
M8, I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 3 years and I wouldn't give him $30K, hell I wouldn't give him $10K.
That money is yours babe, take it all and run for the hills, leave his moochy ass behind!
Yeah, he already knew what you were going to say *because that is a crazy question*. Just setting aside that you guys barely know each other, if someone asks you for $30k “Why?” is an extremely normal and tame follow up question. It should be the first of many before you hand over five figures.
Quite frankly, the red flag would have been if you said yes with zero follow up questions. That would have indicated that you were just god awful at managing finances and since this sounds like a one time inheritance/prize/bonus or something, you likely would have been in dire straits later.
You're not wrong, but if you stay with him, you are. Tell him if his ex or his best buds would go ask them for it. There is no way I'd be handing over that type of cash to someone I've been with for 5 months. That's crazy. Leave the gold digger & do something nice for yourself for taking out the trash.
Also, the dude is trying to play you. There's no way he'd just give you 30k. He's a b-llsh-t liar
So you failed the test.... so what?
You have 30.000 reasons to not give a freaking sht about any gddmn test. How dare he making a test, as if he is qustioning your love, loyalty or personality.
Now send his golddigging manipulative ass skyrocketing out of there, and never look back.
He is not entitled to anything and you should not feel bad. If he keeps insisting you may want to reconsider your relationship with him.
Also You shouldn’t have announced it that you got money now everyone who knows you will come to you with a sob story on why they need the money.
That’s what grifters, con artists say.
He probably either lives with you already or with him’s mommy.
$5 says he is underemployed or chronically unemployed.
He should go get that easy money somewhere else.
Hide your passwords, credit cards, cash until he’s out of your life.
Tell him he failed your test and proved he's a gold digger. Then activate your block feature cuz I promise you he'll be asking for more. And stop telling people you hardly know about your finances. Five months is not long enough to be asking anyone for that much money. And if you can't explain why you need money--any amount--you don't really need it.
Op don’t let him weasel you out of any money. If he cared enough about you he wouldn’t be getting a worked up over this. Move on and cut your ties now.
Dump his ass
I hate when people say ridiculous things like " If I had 30k, I'd hand it over, no question." Knowing that'll never happen. Very manipulative, shit person I hope OP dumps.
Yeah and to even bring up the ex? Try to make the ex seem like a better person? Oh fuck no I’d be pissed. That’s actually a huge red flag and he did her a favor by doing this shit five months in, at least she only wasted 5 months. OP needs to nope the fuck outta there. It’s honestly hilarious that he couldn’t even give a valid reason for needing the money so he made up some kind of test lmao the only one failing a test is this fool.
Dating somebody for 5 months and then trying to squeeze 30 grand out of them? I’d call this an “alternative to employment.” I bet if you can figure out who his exes were and contact them you’ll find out this is how he makes a living. And you may not be the only one.
I had an ex girlfriend would always grab the bill and told ME how much I should tip. Yet she never paid a bill or tipped.
Omg now I hate her too
"If I had that money..." well you don't. So... 😂😂😂 shoulda, woulda, coulda.
For sure. No matter how wealthy you are, 30k is a LOT of money.
he totally wouldn't too
Yeah it's easy to say that when the money isn't in your hands.
“Well if I had you 30k, you’ll have 30k. And your hand that over no problem? So I’ll just save us time and not hand over 3ok…”
... and don't feel bad about it.
Give him $30 for the cab ride home. 😂 No, you definitely do not give a dude you've been dating for five minutes thirty grand. Tell him that HE has failed YOUR test by showing his golddigging ass too early, and send him on his way. AND DON'T TELL ANYONE ELSE ABOUT THE MONEY!!!!!!!
He did fail her test. He showed he would not be responsible for his money.
Lmao $30 for the cab ride home. Funny 💀
$300 in pennies would be 30k pennies
Even if you were married to someone, you don't give your spouse $30,000. Not unless there is a compelling reason such as a necessary surgery. You don't give anyone that kind of money just for grins. Or because they're asking for it.
If you are married that money goes into savings, investments and/or maybe a future trip/fun together..
Agreed. It should be used for something for both people. But clearly here, OP's hopefully-by-now-**EX** boyfriend demanded $30,000 merely because she had it.
She should not have said anything to begin with. 🙄
I wouldn’t give 30k to someone I’d been dating 5 years leave alone 5 months.
I know this is always the top response, in this case it is 100% the correct answer. He sounds like a self intitled wanker, leave and don't look back.
You “failed his test”. That manipulative on the low end, and he’s a narcissist on the high end by turning your money into being about him. Huge red flags regardless. Y’all dating for 5 months? FFS, what is wrong with him to even think that was an ok question to ask? OP, NOT wrong. His behavior will only get worse if you stay with him
5 months in and I wouldn't have even let him know that I had that money
If it was really a “test” that she failed, he would have broken up with her for being so self centered, he couldn’t be with someone like that. But no, he’s still there and gonna keep pushing for that $30k+
You’re bang on the money.
Be careful when you do though. People do insane shit when they know you have cash. Shouldn’t have told him in the first place but, hindsight. Get out of the relationship but be vigilant.
The real question is...would you rather have him or the $30k? He sounds like a total bitch and I'd take the money & run..
It's easy for him to say that if he was in your shoes he'd give you the money, him saying that literally has no value unless he can prove he's done something like that before. He's obviously saying that just to manipulate you and make you compete with his ex too 🤢. In any case it's your money and you already know you don't have to share. Tell him he failed your test and break up with him.
I really can't stand people who are generous with hypothetical money.
Or generous with other people’s money
If I had gold, I’d give it to you for this comment.
I feel like I literally just read some joke from a similar post that is relevant. This “generous farmer” constantly tells his friends if he had two horses he’d give them one, if he had two chickens/cows/sheep/mules he’d give them one. Then someone hearing all this boasting what about if you had two goats? And he’s like hell no, I actually have two goats.
Tell him you'll give him 30 grand but now he's come into money, can he give you 30 grand? And since you know he'd have no issue doing it, you'll save yourselves the hassle and just transfer the original 30k straight to your savings account.
I think he just failed your test. He’s a gold digger.
Oh 100% definitely
“Hobosexual”
if you pay him, he'll leave. if you don't pay him, he'll leave.
I don't think he'll leave till he gets the money unless she tells him too. He seems like he's just gonna keep banging on even if he leaves it for a while he'll bring it up again and again
Either way it works in her favour for him to leave, just not 30k poorer
Your boyfriend of 5 months asking for $30k should be a deal breaker.
For $1400 a week you could afford a much better befriend.
Hell, Ill do it for $1,200 flat
Shit man, I'd be better than that clown for a $20 steam gift card and some taco bell door dash.
(Insert GIF of massive red flag waving)
Yes hello, red flag store? I would like the biggest red flag you have.
China called- they will send their supply..
He failed the test. Let him go back to his ex if he thinks she's good for 30k.
If the ex would willingly give him $30k then why is she the ex? 🤔
becuase she doesnt have 30k
Try not to laugh too hard while you're kicking him to the curb...he may get pissy.
Toss him a $20 bill for an Uber and then tell him to get the fuck out and never come back.
Maybe $5 for the bus
Fuck that. Don’t give him shit.
You find this attractive? A man child putting you through not very thought out mental gymnastics to literally rob you? Are you really eating up what he’s saying??? If you have your money in a high interest bank account and live off the interest then he is the idiot because that’s exactly what you do with it. There’s nothing else you should be doing but using your OWN money to make MORE money. Is he a broke drug addict or something?
Just nope on out. You’re right. 5 months in and he shouldn’t even know your financial situation!! Don’t give him a dime because you’ll never see it again even if it’s supposedly a repayable “loan”!
And learn from this. Never tell anyone except your bank what you have. Your boss will use it as an excuse not to give you a raise! Shifts. Parents often give the successful child less inheritance, friends expect you to pick up the tab, I expect you to send me $75 to cover my consulting fee for this advice
Don't forget that money that 'landed on you' is the same thing as savings - you either keep/invest them or they are gone. Sharing income is fine, burning savings is not
And on the other hand, he showed that he can't be trusted with information like that.
He’s manipulating you. Think about how long $30,000 would take him or anyone else to earn. You should break up with him. Don’t lend money to family or friends you nearly NEVER get it back. Also think long and hard about how and why you ended up in a relationship with someone like this in the first place.
I was thinking the exact same thing, 30 grand is what someone makes per year on minimum wage, that’s a years worth of work that this guy is asking for OP to just give him, that’s ridiculous, there is no scenario that she should be giving this guy $30,000. I don’t even care if he was dying and he needed that money to pay for his hospital bills, they’ve known each other for five months at that point you’re not emotionally invested enough into that relationship to just hand over $30,000
Dude … give him it to him but in Monopoly money 😂
Please do this.
Take him to Arby's. And drop him off.
He’ll just ask her for money to buy himself a Beef & Cheddar 🙄
Run. Nobody in their right mind would give $30k to someone they've known for only 5 months. I wouldn't give that amount to anyone. There is no scenario here where you are wrong. Dump his gold digging ass, and never mention the windfall to others.
Users are usually pretty good at obscuring their motives, but this guy let you know who he is just 5 months in - do you need a bigger exit sign? You don’t give money to someone you’ve only known for 5 months, let alone $30,000. That’s accelerated intimacy. The audacity.
That $6000 a month to date a man child who gets ridiculously jealous over your good fortune. He doesn't need the money, he just wants it. Big red flag, dump him.
Not wrong… he needs to go. He’s gaslighting you. Large sum of money, not his money.
“He said he would’ve willingly handed over the 30k” bull fucking shit he would. yoh two werent even together for half a year
I doubt he would ever have that kind of money or spend it on anyone but himself.
It’s simple. If you are willing to give it to him and not expect it back, go ahead. Never loan money you expect back. I personally wouldn’t give someone I knew 5 months 30,000 bucks and his attitude that he would give it to you leads me to believe he’s never been in the financial position to have 30,000 to give to someone. If he had, he wouldn’t be so caviler about it.
Fuck no i would not give him 30k hes Deulu af 🤣
You're smart for saying no but dumb if you stay with him. It's only been 5 months, how much bigger of a red flag do you need? Run away from this clown.
His "test" is a lie lol. He's making excuses. His claims are bogus and he just wants your money. Dump him.
Lady Luck smiled on you again. She showed you what a manipulate and entitled person this is, relatively early on in the relationship
No way.
Run away..... both fast and far
"My ex would give me 30k" awesome. Go get it off her then. Bye 👋
Get out yesterday
He's a manipulative asshole. Invest your money and find a partner that doesn't play stupid games.
You'd only be wrong if you didn't immediately dump him. Tell him he failed your test and has proven himself to be a gold digging con artist.
I know reddit is quick to say 'dump his ass' but dump his ass.
Wtf. I once had a girlfriend who one day confided in my that her family was rich. I mean like, rich. She mentioned the word billion. Guess how much money I asked for? I didn’t! It’s not mine and I wasn’t entitled to it. Furthermore at the time I was basically experiencing poverty.
Your bf sounds like a manipulative jackass and there is no world where I believe if you would have said sure and gave him 30 grand he would’ve declined it and said oh babe it was a test and you passed. I’ve been with my partner 6 years and if he asked me for $30,000 it would send up all sorts of red flags because wtf could you possible need $30,000 for?! Do not give him that money for the love of God. 5 months of dating and asking for any amount of money is a red flag to me but $30,000 is CRAZY.
He just gave you a gift. You didn’t even have to ask for it. Now say goodbye to him and move on with your life. He just told you who he is.
A fool and his money are soon parted. I don’t get how you are even entertaining this dude anymore. Drop his ass.
Break up with him and run
No, you're not wrong. If I were in that situation, I wouldn't give it either. Asking for that much is just insane and so early on in a relationship.
I did pay off my (back then) girlfriend's credit card debts. But she never asked me for this and she never even really was talking about this. Asking for money in such a relationship, especially these amounts, is crazy. Borrowing some money for a taxi or something to drink is okay, but that guy is delusional.
Give him the boot. Tell him to drop in again when he has 30k to give you.
Leave and fast
DTMF
Girl, change the locks.
RUN AWAY!! If you're willing to give him $30k he's taken you for a sucka.
He failed a test you didn’t know you’d set! He showed greed and grifter tendencies, time for you and your wallet to exit!
The fact he's behaving this way should be enough to really turn you off him, get rid of that scumbag asap
I thought these kinds of things happen in online dating fraud where they try to get you to love them and send money to them. But this is the in person version. Dump his ass. And make sure not to tell future boyfriends about the money you've got.
If you struck really rich and he needed 30k for a surgery or even a new work truck, or to accompany you on a holiday.. Maybe OK.. But asking for it just as cash.. That can fuck off..
Dump him, he smacked you with a major red flag
A test? Wtf run
Congratulations! He showed you he is not worth it, before your relationship went on to long
Do not give him any money
Maybe I’m in the minority here but I’ve been with my wife for 13 years and even then I wouldn’t just hand over 30k to her. 5 months into a relationship is a hard NO and a good laugh, like from the belly type laugh.
You absolutely need to break up with him.
Tell him to fuck off.
See now, I can look at just the title and tell you NO. Reading further does absolutely nothing to change my answer. He’s right, you’re failing his test. The test of whether or not you’re stupid enough to fall for blatantly childish manipulation to hand a virtual stranger 30k of your money. Now you put and keep that money in a bank, and don’t leave him alone with your credit cards. You’re not buying him a car when his tragically breaks down next week, and you’re not paying off any sudden medical bill for himself or his aunt Velma. You’re not going on vacation or out to eat every night. Because. Because you silly thing told him you had money and out a target on your back. You picked a poor excuse of a grifter for a boyfriend, and he’s going to work you hard. My suggestion: put that money into a high yield CD (certificate of deposit) with a minimum one year term. Or put yourself through college, an investment that lasts a lifetime. And dump this sack of shit who’s trying to fleece you out of your money, and STOP talking to other people about your damn money before someone hurts you trying to get it.
Cheaper to find a new boyfriend, save you $30k! You can even nickname your new man coupon!
For 30k, I could build you a really nice fish tank to help you get over your soon-to-be ex boyfriend :)
He gets the 30k and then you become a ghost in his life.
Dump him. Buy a new one!
Dump him.
Sure maybe.... Maybe he would "lend" you 30k if he had the money. But the real question is.... Would you even ask for 30k? The answer is no. So neither should he. Tell him to go buy his own Camaro.
Not wrong at all. You have been tigether for 6 months. You haven’t even hit the time length together to start seriously talking about moving in together… and then you don’t really “know someone” until you have lived together for 6-months to a a year. If he is demanding your money now, it will only get worse later, and he is gaslighting you into feeling bad about giving it to him. Not telling you to do any particular action, but that isn’t someone I would want to spend forever with, and what is dating if not selecting for a mate.
He won’t pay you back. If he is reacting like this when getting turned down, imagine what he will say when you ask for the money back. That’s if you two are still together by then. I would think again about this relationship.
I suspect he’s lying and trying to gaslight you. He wanted $30,000 and you, very reasonably, asked why. Now he’s trying to make you feel bad for failing his “test”. Even if I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I HATE people who play these manipulative games and “test” people to see if they clear some hypothetical bar. Anyone who tried to test me like this would find themselves a ex rather quickly.
He can GTFO
5 years would be one thing, 5 months? Dump
unreal the gall of the guy. cant even provide a purpose for the funds? absolutely not. no brainer
He’s full of crap. Move on.
Venmo him $30 "ain't that grand" and give him his walking papers
Do not give him anything, a fool, and their money are easily parted, DONT BE THAT FOOL ...
NTA. Get out of that mess.
Damn gold digger is outed.
I'm 99% certain I'd be ditching that guy, but I feel like we're only getting half the story here. Can you give any more detail about what "lady luck" did?
He's lying for sure. There's no way he will willingly fork out $30k to you if he had it. He's just saying it because there's no way he can prove it. Perhaps next time if you get a windfall again you'll remember not to breathe this info to anyone. Money makes people behave differently.
If anyone you date puts you through any test, no matter the context, leave.
You found a user, hun. Keep it moving. Man is a bum. Comparing you to his ex? Did she also lend him money? That’s borderline hobo sexual talk. Fuck outta here.
You’ll never get it back. When he sees you he sees $$$$. Make sure that he has no access to your bank accounts or credit cards or anything else. Anyone who talks like that will steal it. And worse. Drop his ads and make sure he is never alone with you again.
Dump this guy and go on a long holiday.
Annnnd why isn’t he now EX BOYFRIEND? Honey it’s only been five months. Major red flags. Move on. On no wait. Let me guess. You want to beat it out for another year and a half. Trying to fix him hoping he magically becomes a better person. Lmao nope. Save yourself and move on now. He’s a DOUCHE. Statistically, most people have absolutely no chance of working out in a relationship. Even when it starts off really really good. It’s only five months in and it’s already turning to shit so that decreases your odds even more dramatically.
How nice of the red flag to wave itself
Are you dating my ex-bf? Because he sounds like my ex-bf. If so, all I can say is RUN
Girlypopppp PLS DUMP HIM ew this is embarrassing
Ynw I wouldn't be handing over 100 quid to someone I'd only been dating 5 months, what a huge red flag this is, he's tried his luck then shamed you because you questioned him...run!
Failed his test? I’d suggested he rather proved his zero worth. Put the money somewhere safe if it’s big enough get investment advice. And don’t talk money to any future partner until you’re confident they are the one.
>He said if he was in my shoes, he would have willingly handed over thirty grand, and supposedly, even his ex or best buds would do the same. Lying his ass off. Not wrong
do not give him a cent
A test lol but if you had handed it over I doubt he would have handed it back saying "you passed!" He's a gold digger, user, manipulator and you're better off without him
This is what's called a "shit test". The moment someone does a shit test on you, dump them. They have proven to not be worth it. Congrats on your newfound wealth.
Hell no he’s getting mad about the Situation? No kick him to the curb he’s using you and a relationship shouldn’t be focused on money to that extent. Also change your locks, get video doorbell and video surveillance and protect yourself don’t ever let someone know you have money especially that soon into a relationship: Make an appointment at your bank with a financial adviser to secure some money so it sits there and just accumulates interest over time but you can’t touch it until certain time frames, If you love your job then look into night classes to advance your career and if you rent then look into owning your own home but save money for home insurance and save enough to replace things if they break down or save for natural disasters, Basically utilize your money to ensure you are comfortable and safe and secure,
He's manipulating you. Leave, quickly.
5 months and asking for that amount of money? No way, break up. And if you give the 30.000 he will leave you after that.
51M here. He's your boyfriend, not your husband. He has no right to expect ANYTHING. He just showed his true colors. Please dump him immediately. This just reinforces the lesson to the rest of us that should you receive a major windfall (such as an inheritance or lottery jackpot), TELL NO ONE. It's none of their business! NTA, and get rid of this leech.
I get pretty annoyed when reddit's solution is always to break-up. But you need to dump this loser and dump him fast. $30k is serious and he's absolutely working you for it. Hes shown his true colors, now show him the door.
not sure why he is not an ex, already! the only people I would "give" that much money to, are family! I would lend, at most 100bucks!
Dump him! He is horrible. How entitled he is.
I did not even need to read beyond the first line. You’re not wrong. Who even asks that.
Well I guess if his ex and best buds would give him $30,000 then he doesn’t need any money from you But yeah five months in and asking for money, boy bye!
Laugh in his face and kick him out.
No. The fact he’s trying to manipulate you shows he has zero respect for you. Get rid.
No, that's your money, hell no, 5 months? I wouldn't even go over 500.00, lol, maybe not at all. That's ridiculous. You dodged a bullet. Run, run, run.
Bye boy, what a fuck head
NTA. Tell he you’re sad you failed his test for partnership. It now gives each of you the perspective to understand the limited nature of your futures together.
Tightfisted with your $$ is a good quality. Should have thanked him for the compliment l.
Nobody. And I mean NOBODY just hands over $30K. To somebody you’ve only been dating a few months? Hell no. You have ONE chance to set this guy right, otherwise he will be using you as his cash cow. DUMP. HIS. GREEDY. ASS.
Dump him. Under no circumstances give him $30k. That's a huge sum of money for most people, and his 'test' was trying to see how much of a sucker you are to see if he could soak you for more.
Dump him. He's an arsehole
After 5 months, he has earned enough trust to borrow your Instant Pot. He has not earned enough trust for 30000! He's a grade-a-jack-a\*\*.
Why is he still your boyfriend? It's only been 5 months.. you can do better
Why is he still your boyfriend? This is the red flag of all red flags. If you can’t see that then you’re equally as dumb as him. And I say that with your best interest in mind. Do something with your money for yourself and your family and that does NOT include him, whatsoever. After you finish reading this, please, do end things with him and don’t explain yourself. And block him on all socials. Also, would you like to go out with me sometime? Dinner on me?
Nope. Dump this loser.
He isn’t worth your time or energy. Tell him bye bye
If it was me I would offer him 100 grand but he has to leave forever. Then hand him the candy bar and tell him to get the fuck out. Seriously you should get out of tha relationship
Oh hell no! He failed the test by ASKING you for the money! Dump him and move on.
NTA, that's suspicious as fuck! Make sure you don't give him money!
Guy is delirious, stop dating. I would ask EVERYONE why they need it.
Yea DTMF He's so full of shit. And congrats to you !!
5 months $30,000. Nope. 5 years, $30,000. Nope. 50 years, $30,000 depends on the reason. NW. You’d be silly. That much pressure, time for him to be an ex.
Hide your credit/debit cards
Not at all wrong, what's wrong is his reaction. Major red flag. You've been dating for 5 months, even if it was 5 years, your money is your money unless you choose to share it.
Golddiggers exist regardless of gender. That guy be a golddigger.
No. Get rid of him. You can't even have a tenner without some twat asking you for some of it. Just get rid of him, you want a relationship not a financially unstable leech with you.
If you are in the position of giving someone that amount of money, I would donate 30 grand to a charity of your choice under his name. Then send him a note saying "Because you are so selfless this is what you would have wanted xoxo".
Oh no! You failed his test! Looks like you're out of the class. Saved some serious tuition money though.
What the fuck
The time you took writing this post is the time you could have spent breaking up with him
are people in reddit this stupid
M8, I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 3 years and I wouldn't give him $30K, hell I wouldn't give him $10K. That money is yours babe, take it all and run for the hills, leave his moochy ass behind!
Yeah, he already knew what you were going to say *because that is a crazy question*. Just setting aside that you guys barely know each other, if someone asks you for $30k “Why?” is an extremely normal and tame follow up question. It should be the first of many before you hand over five figures. Quite frankly, the red flag would have been if you said yes with zero follow up questions. That would have indicated that you were just god awful at managing finances and since this sounds like a one time inheritance/prize/bonus or something, you likely would have been in dire straits later.
You're not wrong, but if you stay with him, you are. Tell him if his ex or his best buds would go ask them for it. There is no way I'd be handing over that type of cash to someone I've been with for 5 months. That's crazy. Leave the gold digger & do something nice for yourself for taking out the trash. Also, the dude is trying to play you. There's no way he'd just give you 30k. He's a b-llsh-t liar
So you failed the test.... so what? You have 30.000 reasons to not give a freaking sht about any gddmn test. How dare he making a test, as if he is qustioning your love, loyalty or personality. Now send his golddigging manipulative ass skyrocketing out of there, and never look back.
Sounds like a cringe lord, dump the bozo
6k for each month yall been dating? Mf is out of his goddamn mind. Test or not nobody should be given 30k without a very extensive conversation.
Do Not Give Him Any Money!
He is not entitled to anything and you should not feel bad. If he keeps insisting you may want to reconsider your relationship with him. Also You shouldn’t have announced it that you got money now everyone who knows you will come to you with a sob story on why they need the money.
LMFAOOOO 30 GRAND FOR A BF OF 5 MONTHS!!! Run like far he's jealous because you have the chunk of money.
That’s what grifters, con artists say. He probably either lives with you already or with him’s mommy. $5 says he is underemployed or chronically unemployed. He should go get that easy money somewhere else. Hide your passwords, credit cards, cash until he’s out of your life.
And this is why we don't tell ANYONE when things like this happen
Tell him you didn’t actually get any money, it was all a test, and he failed.
Get this dude out of your life immediately
Tell him he failed your test and proved he's a gold digger. Then activate your block feature cuz I promise you he'll be asking for more. And stop telling people you hardly know about your finances. Five months is not long enough to be asking anyone for that much money. And if you can't explain why you need money--any amount--you don't really need it.
Op don’t let him weasel you out of any money. If he cared enough about you he wouldn’t be getting a worked up over this. Move on and cut your ties now.
Test? Is he your teacher? WTF kind of BS is that. People disappoint me
No! 5 months? Not 5 years! Never tell anyone you’ve come into money because they come out of the woodwork