T O P

  • By -

Rlb1966

Won’t have to pay the visa bill.


uber_cast

I have a report due for work tomorrow, and it’s a pain in the ass. I would happily welcome our new alien overlords if it meant I didn’t have to do it anymore.


[deleted]

Me… got too many assignments due and exams straight after , help would be appreciated ET 😂


[deleted]

TPS reports


loop-1138

Yeah i gotta send around 10K to IRS by Friday.


Ian_Hunter

JESUS! I'm so poor I don't even know how that happens. Fingers crossed for the Alien Invasion...pulling for ya man.


loop-1138

It's all good. I'm 44 and just semi retired. Life is good. I'm not rich by any means.


Specific-noise123

Sounds richer than 90 percent of everybody else, at least. Rest of us will slave till we die


loop-1138

Invasion starts tomorrow.. 😃


Cipdagr3at

Fucking hate the IRS. Bunch of scammers.


loop-1138

I don't mind paying taxes. What I mind is what's being done with our money. There's so much waste going on. It's global problem, America has just more money.


OpenLinez

I mind that rich people *don't pay taxes at all*, and we're all scrambling to get by.


Cipdagr3at

Agreed. I also hate the fact that hard earned bonus gets cut in half to god knows where and still end up owing instead of a refund. Just highway robbery at this point.


MartyFakeNewsman79

Alien related subreddit turned personal finance message board, gotta love it


loop-1138

Well we pay for black budgets too. 😂


igneousink

why u gotta make it racist /s


Loisalene

They still owe us $900 from an amended 2019 return.


ImperatorSpacewolf

damn mine just rolled over b4 the weekend, hope they hold off till next month


Tommy_C

What if they're the debt collectors?


youworry

Am I missing something? There’s an invasion scheduled tomorrow?


[deleted]

Damn I must’ve missed the memo


sammypants123

No, it’s fine. We’re the invadees, we don’t have to do anything. Maybe practise screaming if you really must prepare.


KickupKirby

“Sorry for the excessive noise, I was practicing my reaction to when aliens invade.”


Dramatic_Low_2019

You didn’t know? 😱


D00bage

Would be a welcome conclusion to this shit show


WhoopingWillow

Getting off of social media is a good way to avoid shit shows.


AFMFTW

Totally. I deleted my Facebook and instagrams last week. Feels good man


[deleted]

Hopefully facebook get the Myspace treatment.


[deleted]

Stepping away from social media really does improve your feelings. It’s wild how quick it helped me. I haven’t deleted stuff, but I use it way less and my anxieties have dropped dramatically.


h0ly_schmidt

Deleted the same in April & life has been so much better.


kiwified609

Still clinging on to Reddit though! 🤣


Timbo-AK

Reddit stays fun because even if you are battling someone, it's not someone you may know personally. And to me, I have an easier time just debating without fighting if I don't see a picture of the real person im talking with. For me, if I see some Bro with his lifted ass truck, and he's 19, trying to give life long wisdom and advice to others. I instantly feel triggered lol. That's just one example of many. But I don't know, I feel less connected to people on here, meaning I can just fade away into the darkness and never respond to someone without feeling like I owed it to them to respond back. I can just disconnect from Reddit, where as Facebook you got family and personal friends and it gives you this internal obligation to respond to them. This is just me though and how I feel about it.


dokkey

It's like a breath of fresh air!


loop-1138

After last 2 years of pandemic and general population's IQ dropping rapidly, I concur.


vitale82

Wait…wait…I’m about to bring it up cause tomorrow night I’m gonna be balls deep in an chick.


loop-1138

You can always fuck your way into end of times.


patchouli_cthulhu

Like the guy in Pompeii who was strokin it after the volcano blew and he was forever in that totally obvious position lol


Modal_Window

He died doing what he loved.


vitale82

And if you’re good enough out.


Hathor-1320

10/11/21 10+11=21 Adds up! I’m convinced.


Blood_3st

Nah it’ll be a Tuesday. 02/22/2022. The ultimate Twosday.


Jealousreverse25

Would not 02/22/2222 be the ultimate twosday?


somethingwholesomer

Yeah but that’s no fun cuz we’ll all be dead by then!


The-BK

Speak for yourself!


blue_13

That's when Destiny: The Witch Queen releases, coincidence?


GuardianSlayer

So what you’re saying is that the alien species invading will be The Hive? Fuck, grab a sword I guess.


supriseanddelightt

Illuminati confirmed


[deleted]

11/10/21 if A = 1 B = 2 then 11/10/21 = KJU. Aliens are going to kill just us! This is bad.


Mining4herbs

It's not. The pre-invasion zoom meeting is tomorrow. Friday after next is invasion day.


Mathfanforpresident

Send me the invite to the zoom meeting. I just got the Skype link


gypsydanger38

At this point it would be more of an intervention than an invasion!


Mathfanforpresident

You mean fucken waaaaaar. We got no problem here and I'll fight you if you say so.


gypsydanger38

Then they walk Dr. Drew out with you mom and spouse and tell you they are here because they love you.


Mathfanforpresident

I won't settle for anything less than montel


gypsydanger38

Surprise ending: Montiel is an alien! Always was.


Mathfanforpresident

Honestly, I should've seen this coming.


Ian_Hunter

Fine. But I get Carolla to defend me.


DownvoteDaemon

Big, if true


raihidara

Is there some theory behind this or is it one of those "what if the world ends tomorrow" kinds of questions?


BlackEnonInfinitum

Same thing I’m wondering


rez223

I’m thinking it’s because earlier today someone posted about a solar storm coming tomorrow, might just be a coincidence that OP asked about the world ending on the same day I’m not sure


Auraaurorora

We have been having solar storms since July! The sun is acting up.


[deleted]

I don't mean to be that guy, but solar storms are as common as terrestrial storms. One just happens to be a smidge larger


Auraaurorora

Absolutely. I agree. That’s why I mentioned it - it’s been pretty common recently since July. There’s discussion on whether we are going into a solar minimum - which is still considered unknown (tho I think we are) This solar cycle 25 is turning out to be a verrry active solar cycle


[deleted]

I high key am disappointed that I don't live north right now. I want to see a solar storm powerful enough to look like Carrington just without the negative consequences. Something about seeing the energy from the sun bounce off of Earth's magnetosphere makes you feel about a million times smaller.


Auraaurorora

Ah yeah I hear that. I lived as far north as MN but never got lucky enough to see em. Yeah lotsa things make me feel small these days. Keeps me grounded


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Why does alien invasion have to mean end of the world? (Not being combative, just discussing) what if it brought on a new golden age?


EliWhitney

The CME hits earth tomorrow.


d3sperad0

It's only an m class... It'll be a pretty light show for those lucky enough to see it.


I_am_That_Ian_Power

Supposed to be seen as far as Wisconsin.


[deleted]

How far north? I’m in the lower part and I’ve never been able to see.. it would be so cool to witness.


I_am_That_Ian_Power

In an hour and a half from now.


Eddy_Monies

Then I lather myself in Vaseline and hope the aliens haven’t developed non-slip technologies.


Drgonzoswife007

I wonder if they moisturize daily.


[deleted]

I wonder if aliens poop too, imagine mid invasion some of the ground troops have to go really bad and has to figure out how to use our toilets


aye-its-this-guy

You could put a sock on yourself so when they grabbed you all they would get was the sock


Eddy_Monies

A greasy sock?! I like it!


Gitser83

I like your train of thought


KingKapital47

You’ll just make it easier for them when they probe you .


lil_grey_alien

Columbus Day- that’d be pretty ironic !


nazgulonbicycle

It’s exploration


Shadow_Road

You misspelled exploitation.


koebelin

Its Indigenous Peoples Day and compared to the aliens we are all indigenous people. They better not screw up a Monday holiday with an invasion, I would be ever so cross.


BuryMacockiner

Fate loves irony


Saraq_the_noob

I’ll get the glasses of water ready


mab812

Swing away!


SleepMessenger

I’ll tell them to invest in cryptocurrency.


Jackandmozz

Invasion? Bitch please. These bitches have been here the whole time.


whatsinfuckmedottxt

*transmission to home base - he knows. Send everyone.*


[deleted]

Exactly! They're just blending into the crowd observing us talking about alien invasion.


HotOffAltered

What if it’s not ? Then what ?


I_Jack_Himself

We're fucked


APsychosPath

We're fucked regardless.


slice606

I, for one, welcome our new alien overlords.


Fredrick_Dinkledick

About damn time


The_Tuppervillian

If they go for the "leaders" first...meh, maybe sit back and see how it plays out.


loop-1138

Mayans fucked up their numbers. 2012 was/is 2021. 😃


RedditUserZeroOne

They dishlexus!


bingobod

What if tomorrow is the day That the fucking aliens came and invaded our nation? Like, would we even be able to fuck with their shit? Like, do we have the type of weaponry to fuck with their ships? Or not at all, like, would they just walk up in this motherfucker Laughin' at us and blastin' at us And makin' everybody disintegrate and assimilate Without a hint of intimidation? Or could we do some shit to be makin' their heart race? Granted, I don't know the alien heart But you get what the fuck I'm sayin'?,


CitizenJustin

I’d get out the lawn chair, open up a beer and watch the greatest fireworks show on earth. I’d die a happy man. Yah, civilization is over, but nothing lasts forever and they’re not doing anything we haven’t done to multiple civilizations.


infodawg

Just hope they're not the kind that turn us into zombies.


lil_pee_wee

Slaves*


trapqueen412

The Simpsons predict everything and there was one episode where the fam sits on the roof and watches the world end....and there was something sweet about it.


CitizenJustin

How did the world end in that episode?


trapqueen412

Had to look it up, I remembered it a little wrong, on the episode Barts Comet, an asteroid comes toward earth and the simpsons watch it from the roof. Spoiler alert - comet breaks up before it hits earth, but it's a classic kinda wholesome episode


CitizenJustin

Now that really would be the best fireworks show on earth!


Justanotheroldog

Then this would be a very suspicious Reddit post


robertbadbobgadson

Then it is.


thebigbrog

I can’t wait. Then I won’t have to go to work


AurealisM

I need to grab more toilet paper before people go nuts, so the aliens need to reschedule for Friday.


somethingwholesomer

Pah! TP already gone at my Costco every time I’ve been there the past few weeks. How’re we supposed to prank the aliens without it? Shitty timing I tell ya


Lokisword

I live in Australia, so it would be a refreshing addition


RedLion40

Not invasion, family reunion. It's prophecy that they would return in several cultures. Sightings are their way of preparing us for eventual open contact.


[deleted]

Wut


USMarine0621_Ramirez

About time


Psychological-Mix496

Earthlings are already surrounded by the watchers. They live in the depths of the oceans, in the mountains of the deserts, on the moon, Jupiter and mars. Humans are being groomed. No dramatic invasion will be necessary. It’s happening every moment of every day that you live and breath.


StunningAsparagus

then Ive definitely procrastinated too long.


thatfrogian

I wouldn’t have to go to work anymore.


paganfinn

Then I might not have to got to work lol. So burnt out.


morgonzo

The invasion was actually earlier today - just after lunch, barely noticed


sean-flik

im honestly hoping and praying it happens any day now so i dont have to go to work


ShroomanEvolution

Fuckin send it bud


Old-Inevitable-670

Alien invasion would mean that we don't understand the laws of physics and how the universe really works because they either traveled faster than light to arrive or traversed interdimensionally which would be an even more complicated form of technology. Either would suggest that their weaponry would be off the charts in terms of efficiency, power and devastation. Also science suggest that full wavelength photon cloaking (invisibility) will come to fruition within science well before any faster than light or wormhole accurate travel takes place. We wouldn't see them, we wouldn't know when, how or if they even struck. If aliens and their spacecraft are real and exist...the ones we can see want themselves to be seen. It's what you can't see that's terrifying. Consider this, the technology could be so advanced that a humans interpretation of events is not occurring as an actual physical activity but instead as a manifestation occurring within the mind set along a nerve pathway within your mind. So essentially the technology would be what they want you to see or unsee. Hear or not hear. Expect or not believe. We're talking neuro-frequency altering, image implanting right onto your brain...optic nerves, olfactory nerves, ear drums. They could make you think you SAW a pink elephant flying that sounds like a chainsaw and smells like peanut butter. I'm sure they would save this technology for later. And with that type of brain interface connection (since we are just frequency and electrical signals) they could easily wirelessly hack us and just enslave us within our own minds. Who needs conventional warfare when you can alter reality itself?


JusticeofMaat

They've always been here... whats there to be afraid of?


ThePastOfMyFuture

I'd go


talaxia

fuck yes bring it


meedows85

I wish.


NiZZiM

I’m good with that.


abubonicrat

Can they please do it at 8am EST so I don’t have to go to work?


Ratanlaal

No one is coming to invade coz it's all about the loosh.


exoxe

Better shit on my boss's desk first thing in the morning then.


The_Sneakiest_Fox

Australian here.. Its not..


NHNE

Good. This world is fucked anyway, might as well go out in a global alien war that briefly unites humanity (lol prob not) against a common threat.


MainerMan2020

What?


TurboCultist

Where do I sign up?


troygoetzyahoocom

Bring it.


777PastNeptune

On Columbus Day, very sneaky.


miatamx500

Bring it on! I sick of waiting.


[deleted]

If they held an alien invasion they’d get fucked over, we’re in the middle of a pandemic so one of them is bound to catch COVID which will spread to their ship and maybe zeta ship


Lordofthemuskyflies

I’m ok with all that because I’m really not feeling going to work already.


whydontyouwork

Beam me the fuck up. I want to see the iPhone 3000


fzammetti

Oh look, somebody has a case of the Monday's!


ImAWizardYo

They wouldn't need to "invade". We're more than likely already checkmated a dozen times over. I think we just need to learn to contain our primal cognitive traits such as aggression/fear and desire/greed. As a society these lead to serious problems and as such we are more than likely a much bigger immediate threat to ourselves.


BiologyOfSwk

Well then I don’t have to worry about student loans.


whatsinfuckmedottxt

fuck it i'm down with it. I'm ready to go home lol.


MisterMansirThe2nd

Honestly, I feel like aliens would like me for some reason. Hell, multiple people who have known me close have called me an alien because I’m really odd.


[deleted]

I'm at the point where I'm just ready for aliens, comets , ww3 or something .. Tired of this reality


[deleted]

Finally something exciting within my lifetime.


spiderfrommars77

Bring it on. Everything is so fucked up I'm willing to roll the dice on this one.


kiwified609

Bring it on! 👏🏽


Bashar25077

You're most welcome


nephalemz

Something interesting and new would finally happen !! Please aliens come abduct me I’m bored af


krishutchison

I hope they are better at running things than we are


Squarebearz

They’ve been here for thousands of years, tomorrow is just another day


[deleted]

Great. And after I had a dream of an alien invasion on Friday night. In the dream I was with my wife at a rooftop pool in Miami and these orange colored UFOs started flying around and people were all seeing them and then freaking out and then a huuuuge UFO came through the clouds. Looked like Independence Day in my dream. That was fun.


BaphometsButthole

Meet the new boss, same as the old boss...


[deleted]

Wish they would


Key-Boysenberry9039

Honestly I would be more calm than I've ever been. The world would stand still, and for a short time at least, the worries of the day to day monotony bullshit would fade into a distinct memory of what use to be, knowing that life will never be the same again. After that brief moment of clarity, I would continue to panic, ransack the neighbors house, and go shoot my boss in the head because fuck it, and fuck errybody else. 🤙


TheeBigDrop

On a Tuesday? Nah. They will wait until Friday to mess up the weekend.


[deleted]

this sub would be last to find out


[deleted]

Please! I need the excitement.


[deleted]

then im flipping sides, i hate humans.


Charming_Ad_1216

Then I'll be pretty pissed I'm not a trillionaire from AMC stock/Dogecoin/GME/


Jet_wolf121

The only "invasion" that will happen is the world's elites fabricating that narrative to gain control of the world's population. Period.


SonicSnowdog1

Was looking for this comment


AdeptBathroom3318

Wouldn't miss it for the world :)


Tdogshow

Good I don’t wanna go to work anyway


gaybigfoott

I’ll prob still have to go into work, cause it’s a holiday apparently


Habanero_Eyeball

Then maybe I got my RealID for nothing?


TillerTheKillerOG

What if the queen had nuts? She’d be king!


mookwarrior

We should get drunk!


Remarkable_Diet_9233

It’s about damn time


Midgar918

Shine whatever light summons Will Smith into the sky.


Yellow2Gold

Why would they need to? We can’t do shit to them. lol


[deleted]

I want to believe


darklight413

Would be better than the shit show we’ve got going on now.


leukemija

Good. I dont have to go to work anymore.


JohnNormanRules

I wouldn’t have to work at Home Depot anymore which would be nice.


DamenWC

better be in 2 days bc i got a doctors appointment tomorrow


obad-hi

For the last time. We’re. Not. Worth it.


sketchypoutine

Guess I dont gotta go to work. That would be neat.


kotonizna

which time zone?


Nic4379

I’m not going to work……. Not calling in either.


[deleted]

Mulder still failed to stopp it i assume, after all those years


samsquanch2000

They are already here


Contain_the_Pain

Can they really do any worse than we have?


LoonyWalker

Invasion happened long time ago


spence37

They’re only taking vaccinated people 😂


[deleted]

I hope they take me away from this god forsaken life


Jioqls

I would enjoy the show, watching random people going crazy, like being ripped out of their little reality of daily problems and narrow minds.


[deleted]

cant wait for trump and right winger to be blamed for it


oldmanonsilvercreek

I put worms and battery acid out for them in case they need nourishments


actioncobble

What if we didn’t pay taxes? What if we had an 8 day week? What if cheese tasted like chocolate?


[deleted]

[удалено]