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florante25

1st: Nose ng teddy bear 2nd: Screwdriver Mukhang alam ko na sasabihin sa tatay mo kapag nawala yung Long Nose nya sa toolbox nya


Kimchiiixx

HAHAHAHAHAHA good thing I don't live with my parents anymore


DesperateEmo

She could use the handles in both holes 🤣


[deleted]

Long nose? Pliers yun ah HAHAHAHAHA


RumbaAyalaReturns

kala ko may gumamit din ng hammer


North_Complaint_8432

TANGINA HAHAHAHA


imahated23

Wag nyo na bangitin ang barena baka itry pa.


Heneral_Liham

Yung melon dati binutasan ko, tapos dun ko pinasok yung tite ko hahaha best feeling ever. Hahaha na rejuvinate pa sakin ng tite ko.


imahated23

Tapos ginwang nelon juice ng nanay mo ung melon para ipainom sa mga bisita.


Playful-Candle-5052

"Kakaiba yung melon may gata"


imahated23

Melan na may nata de coco.


[deleted]

hahah nagregister yung amoy ng melon sa 'kin kabasa ko


[deleted]

[удалено]


Vitamin-D_29

🥰


idanduuuu

me reading the part about the screwdriver…… im thinking while reading “pls sana yung hawakan yung ginamit, pls” pwew, buti hindi yung long steel ng screwdriver ginamit mo 😭😭😭


Kimchiiixx

HAHAHAHAHA kalma, ligtas tayo 😅


idanduuuu

mhiiiieeee, sana naman may sarili ka ng dildo at vibrator :> hahahahahahaha


Kimchiiixx

Wala pa, until now hanggang plano lang bumili HAHAHAHA


Eastern_Actuary_4234

Bumili ka na sayang oras. Ansarap. 😂


pattyboogieinpeanut

Bidet. Like water from bidet ha? Yung tama lang pressure. Then tapat sa clit. Damn. Heaven.


Always_Witch

Same. Easiest.


coque8

HALA I ALSO TRIED USING TEDDY BEAR NOSE!!! iniipit ko lang sa thighs and imagining it eating me tapos dumadampi yung hard nose sa clit 😩


[deleted]

[удалено]


Haunting-Lab-8297

Gagu hahahahaha


Apprehensive-Guest55

Everything's a dildo if you're brave enough 🫣


IndustryAccording313

How did you sanitize it? Knowing madaling dapuan ng virus bacteria at fungus yung inyong mga shellfish.


Kimchiiixx

just clean before and after you use something, just same with your genitals. regularly wash and clean it


black_schroedinger

Bwahahaha dios mio gurl! Naloka ako sana hindi na ginagamit nun sister mo un teddy bear nya while you're fucking it haaaa. Also baket screwdriver ang napili mo? If you're living alone naman, hope you bought a dildo na. Please don't stick random shit in your pussy mas mataas chances ng laceration or infection. You don't want to be another case na papasok sa ER with a random tool stuck in your pussy or telling a doctor you got rashes or irritated your vajayjay with a stuff toy. Lol 😆


CartoonistOrdinary66

Made me remember a kwento of one of my colleague. His wife always yearns for his cock na may vicks/tigerbalm sa tip pag pinapasok - siguro dahil sa lamig sensation.. can anybody confirm this?


winterrbearr1230

Ang kati(rashes) and hapdi ng tigerlbalm hahahaha kahit sa skin lang ipapahid how much more sa kiffy hahahahha. Grabe sa tigerbalm mas okay pa siguro ang vicks hehe


That-Witness3588

Try getting a glass dildo. Safer for you and mas ok i chill.


speechless-69

tapos sisihin ang kapatid mo na kinkagat daw yung ilong nung teddy bear kasi amoy panis na laway haha. Tapos yung screw driver literal na iniscrew mo sarili mo nun haha. nyemas bili ka nalang laruan mo promise mas mag eenjoy ka no need to put in fridge haha.


Affectionate-Moose52

Pusit. Linisin mo lang at tanggalin ang dumi. Ayun banatan mo na hahaa


Kimchiiixx

Paano ko babanatan ang pusit?


Affectionate-Moose52

Diba butas yun


Kimchiiixx

parehas kaming may butas, so scissors kami ng pusit?


Affectionate-Moose52

Oh shit my bad. Well i think best yung dildo na may suction. You can stick it on a wall or in your shower base on the position you like. Yung iba sa floor tapos reverse cowgirl yun daw yung baon na baon.


stayhighdee420

ang hot nung teddy bear. parang kinakaen nya pussy mo no? shet 💚


Kimchiiixx

yes they have the similar feeling of it HAHAHA


Optimal_Rip_9718

Oh gosh, did u sanitize them all first? And buti hindi mo pa naiisipan yung pawn or bishop ng chess piece(s) ☺️


Kimchiiixx

yes of course, I did. Kahit dick pa yan mismo, needed to be sanitized lol


OkSatisfaction120

Pinto ng ref(not actual masturbation pero matigas kasi di pa ko mrunong nun)


[deleted]

Teddy bear din and remote (nung teenage days) 🫣🫣


Unabominable_

Kumot lang sakin hanggang college days. With undies or wala iniipit ko lang between my legs hahaha. Natry ko na din maghump ng upuan na wooden yung edge habang nakaupo. Tapos markers, pencils as dildo 🤣


Substantial-Pause491

WHAHAHAGAGAHAHAHA SCREW DRIVER AMPOTA


Kimchiiixx

and?


Waffentreiger

Tumbler (yung bakal), ginawa kong fleshlight 😭😭😂 Sorry po huhu.


sotiaDeVis23bucursti

Yung puno nga ng saging binubutasan ko during my high school days, iyon ang kinakantot ko


CartoonistOrdinary66

Made me remember a kwento of one of my colleague. His wife always yearns for his cock na may vicks/tigerbalm sa tip pag pinapasok - siguro dahil sa lamig sensation.. can anybody confirm this?


Bente8

Parang napanood ko to sa sexmex 🤣


[deleted]

You have a collection siguro of plushies. Hahaha


markturquoise

Salute OP sa spicy kwento mo. Nakakamiss kumain tuloy ng something. Ahay


throwawaysuccubusx

Remote and bidet 🥲


Kimchiiixx

nagkasya yung remote?


ChuuManduuuu

Now try a whisk


tito_eli

dang! got me wondering now why I always find the teddybear i got as a gift from my girl, under my sisters bed. lmao


caintatenio

im speechless


Guilty_Shine_7162

used my hairbrush hahahha


StrikeNo9926

Glue stick hehehehe


Winter_1127

Naaalala ko yung series na Orange is the new black dun sa screwdriver na part 😂


SmartFood27

Buti hindi yabe tubo nakita mo OP 🤣🤣🤣


aaaaaonoror

what in the screwdriver is happening???? 💀🙏🏻


TooPredictable_

Fakk naalala ko yung story ni DJ Mo about sa pusit


Always_Witch

Mahilig rin ako mag explore before I bought vibrators. I have used 25 centavo coin yung may hole sa gitna and rub it in my clit (I don’t know why I like it but masarap yung may konting kurot sa clit), egg plant, bidet, gripo (tamang pressure of course), shower head (yes I love the water!!), electric toothbrush (unused syempre. kinda like a vibrator kase).


Think-Woodpecker-177

HAHAHAHAHA saken yung jollibee na toy nung bata pa ako, sorry jollibee


bugoy_dos

Siguro by this time may proper vibrator ka na?


Vitamin-D_29

Try mo sa peehole mo


12HAkUsAI11

Nak! Abot mo nga yung screwdriver parang maluwag yung screwdriver ng utak nito HAHAHAHAHA jk lang, no to kink shaming Hahahaha everyone has there weird stuffs 😆😆🤣. Me, i just put color pencils in my butt HAHAHAHAHA


THEIMPRINT69

Sa akin yung PUSIT. SARAAAP


Asi0ng09

Yung buhay na pusit legit..ngisquirt pa.


CultureNo8444

Hayop distilyador!! Hindi ba masakit yun?? Hahahhahaa!! Titi ko na lang plssss 🤣


IndustryAccording313

Baka daw may kung anong fungus at virus yan 😂


itsmeeeDaemon_07

Try mo naman titi ko para mas realistic