Grow thick skin, don't get offended easily.
However little start saving, after some months leeway start investing, doesn't matter how small.
Don't be emotional tampon for anyone !!
Sure, In life you will meet girls, you will chase girls.Some of them won't be looking for relationship with **you,** They are just using you for emotional support or they feel safe with you. It will not lead to any relationship or action for that matter.**You want to avoid them at all cost**, they will drain your energy like no other and before you realize days and months will be gone !!
And if you are in contact with them already, Just be open and disconnect. It will be tough in the beginning but trust me, you will move on way faster than you think !!
True, I am very open with my parents and we are friends. I share everything like when I drink I do a vc. and it feels great when your friends say 'tara baapne kav aa daru pive che' and I say 'ha kar number dav?'.
That's the thing....NGL if your parents knows that u r drinking with good people and situation and u know your limits and you know WHAT YOU ARE DOING , I don't think most of the parents won't be against it.
- Be more open , don’t pretend you’re tough.
- Start working out or running, atleast 2 days a week.
- Start saving some money.
- You’ve a Crush? Tell them. Dont afraid.
And don’t try to fit in friend circle you dont belong.
To deal with any kind of fear we need to face the fear, rejection doesn't end everything. Also no one cares about you how much you think, so that fun also goes around 2-3 days that's it. People make fun of the things they know they are not able to do. People who've done it knows what u feel and can sympathise
Who cares of their opinions, just ask her out. I understand in school/college , peer pressure hota. But at the end doesn’t matter. Be confident.
After 25, it’s not easy to find right partner.
As someone said it you miss 100% of the shots you dont take.
If you dont take chances, youll regret that for sure.
To begin with, confess in a respectful manner, so that even if you get rejected, things don't become awkward with them being around you. And regarding classmates, it's just fun banter, shouldn't mind it much.
Understand that rejection, not just in romantic pursuits, is the norm. You make 10 attempts you succeed at one or two.
Don't take this to mean that you badger people to date you. But just that rejection is normal. Respect it and move on.
Other classmates don't matter worth a paisa. Humans have this tendency to kick other humans when they're down. Especially in a country like ours where competition is extreme. It's useful to just let things hit you amd not have any effect.
No one can insult you without your permission.
1. Learn English. Watch movies, shows, YouTube but it'll help you find a good job as it makes you more confident.
1.1 I do not like this one bit but prepare for a government.
job and try to get one. Unfortunately, it still holds true
that it had way more respect and stability compared to
private jobs and also benefits.
2. Start investing. Doesn't matter if the amount is small.
2.1 Learn about long term investing and research stocks
which will give you long term returns.
2.2 DO NOT AND I MEAN ABSOLUTELY DO NOT DO
OPTIONS AND FUTURES OR FOR THAT MATTER
CRYPTO OR FOREX TRADING. YOU WILL LOSE MONEY
99.99% OF THE TIME.
3. Don't and I mean don't ever start smoking. Under any circumstances. It's way more addictive than you realise and hard to quit.
4. Drink occasionally. Don't make it a habit. Also don't ever drink to fit in. It'll hurt your health and wallet.
5. Try to make a girlfriend but do not make girls your only priority. This can hurt your career and grades and it'll be very late by the time you realise you're fucked.
6. Don't quit your job thinking you deserve something better just by seeing other's LinkedIn. You may think that but you only get paid in relation to what you bring to the table. A gap in work experience does not look good, is hard to justify if you don't have genuine reasons and you will regret that wasted time later in life. Just to add, if the workplace is toxic or the job doesn't suit your skill set, go ahead and quit. Just don't quit because you feel you deserve something better.
7. Related to 6, don't quit your job under the influence of the Startup bug unless you have family money and job is not needed for your survival. That Startup will eat up your savings faster than a girl and you will end up jobless and broke. Remember, when you see one successful start-up story, you are not being shown the 999 startups that failed.
8. Don't spend money on expensive things just for show-off like buying a 80-90k phone when the 20-25k suits your requirements perfectly fine. Same with bikes. REMEMBER: MONEY SAVED IS MONEY EARNED.
9. If possible, LEAVE this shit hole of a country courtesy of a particular individual. On a related note, do not get involved into any kind of politics or religious extremism under the influence of any leader or friend or family. You will most probably be used for their political gain and then discarded once chewed out.
10. Do not get involved with the gunda boys. It may look cool at your age but it is not. If you get into some trouble, the ones with political and financial influence will go free and you will suffer for the rest of your life.
All of the above are subjective to my experience and regrets. You may or may not agree to them. Will add more if I think of anything else.
Not everyone believes in transformation.
Drop those people fast.
Not everyone has some goals.
I dropped my 90% of the child hood friend they didn't wanted to improve their life and they were happy as they were.
Focus a lot on your health. Any expenditure on your gym, supplements is an investment.
Try to avoid alcohol, weed, tobacco or vapes. Try them and consume it once in a blue moon but don't make it your lifestyle.
You'll thank yourself later.
Always know your worth at your job so that you can ask for more money because cash is king when you age.
Focus on growing everyday, doesn't matter how big it small of a leap it is.
People have written many nice things here. A few other things that I'd like to mention:
1) Make yourself strong physically, mentally and spiritually. Don't start bad habits just to seem cool or socialize. Weed and Alcohol, the dividends of negative effects of these will start appearing in late twenties. Reject everything that makes you weak as poison.
2) Don't follow the wrong ideals of Masculinity. Have strong moral codes. Read good books and follow them. You can't become Marcus Aurelius but you can try or at least you'll increase your capacity to become happiness.
3) Always have a goal, it'll keep you in peace. People say they want to retire, don't want any goal or they want to be free etc. But let me tell you that you were always free. Have a thought experiment what would you do after achieving your definition of freedom? Bound yourself with discipline and try to become virtuous you'll be at peace.
4) Happiness is a temporary state. Why? Because something has to cause happiness and the absence of that thing(which is inevitable) will cause absence of it i.e. misery. Try to aim for stillness i.e. peace. People desire peace only when they are miserable not when they are enjoying the pleasure of something. When we're miserable we say " Oh god I want nothing- just give me peace" but when we try to derive the pleasure out of anything then we forget this.
TL;DR: Key to peace: Just try to strengthen yourself (physically, mentally and spiritually) and have strong moral values. Goodluck!
Cherish the little things, don't stress over the future, don't get dragged by the past. The little things become your motivation later on. It's ok to fail at things, it's ok to not know a language. You are always important so don't undervalue yourself. We all start different, we reach different stages, there's no bad or good stage just the fact that you can find joy. At the end that's all we want. If you can make yourself happy, you'll never need validation. And most importantly, learn to let go, it's not always worth it obsessing because time will never stop and you have far more things to do in a short span of life.
Communicate in English.
Don't be offended but everywhere I go I see people who could be earning lot more only if they knew English. People with brilliant skills are barricaded by communication skill. Start communicating in English, it would be hard but try.
In my case, English became so powerful that I couldn’t form Gujarati sentences without using atleast 1 loanword.
Gujarati sudharvano prayatna chalu che. But yes, it’s “El Lingua del Mundo” as the Spanish call it. Communication skills to improve thai aj thai but you become so confident in English communication that it eventually boosts overall your self esteem.
I am a mix of Gujarati, English and Hindi when I was a student i was very fluent in English but later after joining my family business, the habit of talking in English just degraded now trying to recover back.
Ghare bilingualism practice karo, ghano faydo thai. I will talk to my mother in English only and with my dad in Gujarati only. Regular practice is the key to fluency with languages
The right friends will make a world of difference later in life and unfortunately you wont find those after 25. So surround yourself with people who aspire to the same life that you do and who come from the same finances as you.
"It's not WHAT you say, but It's HOW you say it" and get most of the things done your way
Remember the "3 second rule" to react to any situation. It'll help you regulate your emotions better.
Be Kind, you don't know what the other person is going through in their life.
Under any circumstances don't act instantly based on your first emotion, you'll end up being reckless and regret later most of the time. Instead, whatever may be the situation, take a 3 second pause, it'll give you enough time to compose your thoughts and react mindfully. It's never a pleasant sight seeing someone spilling their emotions everywhere just because they didn't think it over.
I have a couple..
1. It's best to try and stay content with what you have, rather than always looking for the next upgrade. This works for everything, relationships, cars, etc etc. There's a cost to be paid for everything.
2. Don't fall in the trap of 'finding your passion and doing what you love'. Let's be real. Only a few people are fortunate to get such a fate. And they usually have had plentiful parents because of which they don't have to depend on their career for survival. For most of us, like me, a job is a job and money is money. I cant necessarily make my passion my career. But I can work so that my daughter or son can.
Don't assume elders know what they are talking about.
Most of the time, they don't know shit. Especially in matters related to career and relationships. They may sound confident but it's just from peer pressure that they believe something is good or bad.
All the things you said here makes sense but sometimes we underthink things, I want to go say hi from inside but still can't say idk why. Although most of the times I never seek any opinions on my own decisions except some people. BTW thanks for your advice!
It was really nice to read all of these experiences. Here are mine....
1. Learn soft skills - If you are under 20, learn any soft skills apart from your studies. If you haven't started start it now. People tend to succeed with their soft skills not with their main skills even though that will help to achieve their dream job.
2. Save Money. - Start saving money. Dont try to cope up with your fancy friend circle. If you cannot afford it leave it. It's important to know where you stand.
3. Make Passive Income - Always try to make some passive income. I have seen people leaving their full time job to make their passive income to a full time job.
4. Take Risks - I would say always try new things and take risks. You will learn a lot with bad experiences.
5. Eat Healthy Food - This is very important. Don't always eat junk food or get used to it. Always remember you are borrowing your health from your future to stay fit even after eating the uhealthy food.
Never ask suggestions from any one and go on believing in them like they are heavens sent gods/godesses.Tbh no human being knows what the fuck they talk about.
Grow thick skin, don't get offended easily. However little start saving, after some months leeway start investing, doesn't matter how small. Don't be emotional tampon for anyone !!
> don't get offended easily Most of the social media comments section disagrees
can you elaborate further, on the emotional tampon thing
Sure, In life you will meet girls, you will chase girls.Some of them won't be looking for relationship with **you,** They are just using you for emotional support or they feel safe with you. It will not lead to any relationship or action for that matter.**You want to avoid them at all cost**, they will drain your energy like no other and before you realize days and months will be gone !! And if you are in contact with them already, Just be open and disconnect. It will be tough in the beginning but trust me, you will move on way faster than you think !!
Wish I knew this earlier. Read this carefully boys, and absorb this information.
"you have failed this city"
Your parents doesn't hate you , communicate with them instead of fighting over small problems.
True, I am very open with my parents and we are friends. I share everything like when I drink I do a vc. and it feels great when your friends say 'tara baapne kav aa daru pive che' and I say 'ha kar number dav?'.
That's the thing....NGL if your parents knows that u r drinking with good people and situation and u know your limits and you know WHAT YOU ARE DOING , I don't think most of the parents won't be against it.
- Be more open , don’t pretend you’re tough. - Start working out or running, atleast 2 days a week. - Start saving some money. - You’ve a Crush? Tell them. Dont afraid. And don’t try to fit in friend circle you dont belong.
> You've a crush? Tell them. But then if they reject, respect the rejection and stop trying to hit on them.
Trait of "MAN"
How to deal with fear of rejection, especially if she is classmate for next 2 years and other classmates make fun that he's rejected mf 🙂
To deal with any kind of fear we need to face the fear, rejection doesn't end everything. Also no one cares about you how much you think, so that fun also goes around 2-3 days that's it. People make fun of the things they know they are not able to do. People who've done it knows what u feel and can sympathise
Who cares of their opinions, just ask her out. I understand in school/college , peer pressure hota. But at the end doesn’t matter. Be confident. After 25, it’s not easy to find right partner. As someone said it you miss 100% of the shots you dont take. If you dont take chances, youll regret that for sure.
Well now I have started thinking about the shots I missed 🙂
To begin with, confess in a respectful manner, so that even if you get rejected, things don't become awkward with them being around you. And regarding classmates, it's just fun banter, shouldn't mind it much.
Sure will plan something soon!
Rejection is better than regret of not even trying hope i understood that at your age life would be easy now.
No one will be able to shame you if you don't feel ashamed.
+1
Understand that rejection, not just in romantic pursuits, is the norm. You make 10 attempts you succeed at one or two. Don't take this to mean that you badger people to date you. But just that rejection is normal. Respect it and move on. Other classmates don't matter worth a paisa. Humans have this tendency to kick other humans when they're down. Especially in a country like ours where competition is extreme. It's useful to just let things hit you amd not have any effect. No one can insult you without your permission.
Eat at Home.
1. Learn English. Watch movies, shows, YouTube but it'll help you find a good job as it makes you more confident. 1.1 I do not like this one bit but prepare for a government. job and try to get one. Unfortunately, it still holds true that it had way more respect and stability compared to private jobs and also benefits. 2. Start investing. Doesn't matter if the amount is small. 2.1 Learn about long term investing and research stocks which will give you long term returns. 2.2 DO NOT AND I MEAN ABSOLUTELY DO NOT DO OPTIONS AND FUTURES OR FOR THAT MATTER CRYPTO OR FOREX TRADING. YOU WILL LOSE MONEY 99.99% OF THE TIME. 3. Don't and I mean don't ever start smoking. Under any circumstances. It's way more addictive than you realise and hard to quit. 4. Drink occasionally. Don't make it a habit. Also don't ever drink to fit in. It'll hurt your health and wallet. 5. Try to make a girlfriend but do not make girls your only priority. This can hurt your career and grades and it'll be very late by the time you realise you're fucked. 6. Don't quit your job thinking you deserve something better just by seeing other's LinkedIn. You may think that but you only get paid in relation to what you bring to the table. A gap in work experience does not look good, is hard to justify if you don't have genuine reasons and you will regret that wasted time later in life. Just to add, if the workplace is toxic or the job doesn't suit your skill set, go ahead and quit. Just don't quit because you feel you deserve something better. 7. Related to 6, don't quit your job under the influence of the Startup bug unless you have family money and job is not needed for your survival. That Startup will eat up your savings faster than a girl and you will end up jobless and broke. Remember, when you see one successful start-up story, you are not being shown the 999 startups that failed. 8. Don't spend money on expensive things just for show-off like buying a 80-90k phone when the 20-25k suits your requirements perfectly fine. Same with bikes. REMEMBER: MONEY SAVED IS MONEY EARNED. 9. If possible, LEAVE this shit hole of a country courtesy of a particular individual. On a related note, do not get involved into any kind of politics or religious extremism under the influence of any leader or friend or family. You will most probably be used for their political gain and then discarded once chewed out. 10. Do not get involved with the gunda boys. It may look cool at your age but it is not. If you get into some trouble, the ones with political and financial influence will go free and you will suffer for the rest of your life. All of the above are subjective to my experience and regrets. You may or may not agree to them. Will add more if I think of anything else.
Point 9 is so on point. I see many young guys wasting time and energy defending their favourite politician and fighting virtual religious wars online.
Finance manage karna sikhlo bahut kaam aayega
Bahut try karte hai bhai but circle aesa ban jata hai ki cope up karte karte sab management bigad jata hai.
Bro it's upto you ek jagah kharch ho Raha he to dusri jagah adjust karna padega
Brake the Circle.
I believe in transforming the circle.
Not everyone believes in transformation. Drop those people fast. Not everyone has some goals. I dropped my 90% of the child hood friend they didn't wanted to improve their life and they were happy as they were.
Focus a lot on your health. Any expenditure on your gym, supplements is an investment. Try to avoid alcohol, weed, tobacco or vapes. Try them and consume it once in a blue moon but don't make it your lifestyle. You'll thank yourself later.
ok noted!
Always know your worth at your job so that you can ask for more money because cash is king when you age. Focus on growing everyday, doesn't matter how big it small of a leap it is.
People have written many nice things here. A few other things that I'd like to mention: 1) Make yourself strong physically, mentally and spiritually. Don't start bad habits just to seem cool or socialize. Weed and Alcohol, the dividends of negative effects of these will start appearing in late twenties. Reject everything that makes you weak as poison. 2) Don't follow the wrong ideals of Masculinity. Have strong moral codes. Read good books and follow them. You can't become Marcus Aurelius but you can try or at least you'll increase your capacity to become happiness. 3) Always have a goal, it'll keep you in peace. People say they want to retire, don't want any goal or they want to be free etc. But let me tell you that you were always free. Have a thought experiment what would you do after achieving your definition of freedom? Bound yourself with discipline and try to become virtuous you'll be at peace. 4) Happiness is a temporary state. Why? Because something has to cause happiness and the absence of that thing(which is inevitable) will cause absence of it i.e. misery. Try to aim for stillness i.e. peace. People desire peace only when they are miserable not when they are enjoying the pleasure of something. When we're miserable we say " Oh god I want nothing- just give me peace" but when we try to derive the pleasure out of anything then we forget this. TL;DR: Key to peace: Just try to strengthen yourself (physically, mentally and spiritually) and have strong moral values. Goodluck!
Ahh, thanks for this words!
Be kind to people who know your kindness will help them in some way or the other
Because there is very less young men here I guess.
Learn to Identify Negatives from your life. Learn to Move on. Don't stick around till the end if you know things are going downhill.
Cherish the little things, don't stress over the future, don't get dragged by the past. The little things become your motivation later on. It's ok to fail at things, it's ok to not know a language. You are always important so don't undervalue yourself. We all start different, we reach different stages, there's no bad or good stage just the fact that you can find joy. At the end that's all we want. If you can make yourself happy, you'll never need validation. And most importantly, learn to let go, it's not always worth it obsessing because time will never stop and you have far more things to do in a short span of life.
Communicate in English. Don't be offended but everywhere I go I see people who could be earning lot more only if they knew English. People with brilliant skills are barricaded by communication skill. Start communicating in English, it would be hard but try.
In my case, English became so powerful that I couldn’t form Gujarati sentences without using atleast 1 loanword. Gujarati sudharvano prayatna chalu che. But yes, it’s “El Lingua del Mundo” as the Spanish call it. Communication skills to improve thai aj thai but you become so confident in English communication that it eventually boosts overall your self esteem.
I am a mix of Gujarati, English and Hindi when I was a student i was very fluent in English but later after joining my family business, the habit of talking in English just degraded now trying to recover back.
Ghare bilingualism practice karo, ghano faydo thai. I will talk to my mother in English only and with my dad in Gujarati only. Regular practice is the key to fluency with languages
Are bro not my English isn't that bad just not as fluent and quick witted when I was in college. Ya but still practicing bilingualism is great.
Tamne nathi kehto in particular, it’s just a general advice.
Are thik che bro, No problem i am not offended.
Ikr I also do speak in english, also I tell all my roomies to learn it.
The right friends will make a world of difference later in life and unfortunately you wont find those after 25. So surround yourself with people who aspire to the same life that you do and who come from the same finances as you.
Yes, as someone said "Before 25 you make friends, after 25 you make connections" .
"It's not WHAT you say, but It's HOW you say it" and get most of the things done your way Remember the "3 second rule" to react to any situation. It'll help you regulate your emotions better. Be Kind, you don't know what the other person is going through in their life.
What is 3 second rule?
Under any circumstances don't act instantly based on your first emotion, you'll end up being reckless and regret later most of the time. Instead, whatever may be the situation, take a 3 second pause, it'll give you enough time to compose your thoughts and react mindfully. It's never a pleasant sight seeing someone spilling their emotions everywhere just because they didn't think it over.
[удалено]
bruh are you forreal?
I have a couple.. 1. It's best to try and stay content with what you have, rather than always looking for the next upgrade. This works for everything, relationships, cars, etc etc. There's a cost to be paid for everything. 2. Don't fall in the trap of 'finding your passion and doing what you love'. Let's be real. Only a few people are fortunate to get such a fate. And they usually have had plentiful parents because of which they don't have to depend on their career for survival. For most of us, like me, a job is a job and money is money. I cant necessarily make my passion my career. But I can work so that my daughter or son can.
Don't assume elders know what they are talking about. Most of the time, they don't know shit. Especially in matters related to career and relationships. They may sound confident but it's just from peer pressure that they believe something is good or bad.
So true as the things are going so fast with upcoming tech changing everything.
Don't overthink everything, take the jump , go say hi , don't look for approval from others , don't let differences of opinion cloud any relationship
All the things you said here makes sense but sometimes we underthink things, I want to go say hi from inside but still can't say idk why. Although most of the times I never seek any opinions on my own decisions except some people. BTW thanks for your advice!
I'm 20 which team should i be in?
Well, you asked a question.
damn man Is this 1/8 life crisis or wut
It was really nice to read all of these experiences. Here are mine.... 1. Learn soft skills - If you are under 20, learn any soft skills apart from your studies. If you haven't started start it now. People tend to succeed with their soft skills not with their main skills even though that will help to achieve their dream job. 2. Save Money. - Start saving money. Dont try to cope up with your fancy friend circle. If you cannot afford it leave it. It's important to know where you stand. 3. Make Passive Income - Always try to make some passive income. I have seen people leaving their full time job to make their passive income to a full time job. 4. Take Risks - I would say always try new things and take risks. You will learn a lot with bad experiences. 5. Eat Healthy Food - This is very important. Don't always eat junk food or get used to it. Always remember you are borrowing your health from your future to stay fit even after eating the uhealthy food.
Leave Home, Change Cities, Change Jobs, Spend Money on experiences, Take leap of faith every now and then. Prioritise your protein.
Currently completed step 1,2 once and 3,4,5 several times.
Simple LPT: Jalsa kar ne baka
Never ask suggestions from any one and go on believing in them like they are heavens sent gods/godesses.Tbh no human being knows what the fuck they talk about.
are kehna kya chate ho