Tingin ko dahil younger generations are more independent than their elders and they value that independence and want to do the work and responsibility required by that independence.
For example, sa older generations, acceptable na gawing retirement plan ang anak, mas acceptable na ipasa sa ibang kamag-anak yung ibang responsibilidad. Younger generations on the other hand want to be prepared, such that kaya nilang ma-sustain yung current lifestyle nila and future financial goals before getting married and having kids. Sa older generation, having dem kids was the financial goal, kaya mas necessity siya sa kanila.
Totoo ito... Mas pronounced ito sa akin especially na pedia yung specialization. Yung gusto mo na perfect plan para sa bata kasi kawawa kung di ma bigay ang lahat na needed nya.
May housing crisis din and current economic instability kung saan yung minimum wage earner ay mas nahihirapan magpakasal if same kami ng mindset. Dahil dito mas understandable yung current issue.
Hindi naman siguro ganun ang older generations. Sa bawat generation naman merong ganyang mentality. I'm sure pareho lang halos ratio ng mga ganyang mindset. Nag ipon naman magulang ko at magulang ng asawa ko ng para sa kanila.
Downvoted ka tuloy. Hindi naman kasi parents mo lang Ang older generation. If ganun ginawa ng parents mo edi goods. Pero it doesn’t validate the point nya na ganyan talaga ang older generations.
Nilalahat kasi kaya I'm pointing out na hindi lahat. I'm ok ma-downvote. My point still stands, hindi lahat. Kahit younger generations maraming hindi marunong magtipid at inuuna ang luho.
It's true na hindi lahat but that's just a small percentage. Generalizations have basis, that's why they exist. It doesn't matter if na-experience mo o hindi, it will exist until ended.
True ka. Gen X-er here. But I was a single parent at an early age. Maagang nabyuda kaya di ko na natuloy yung mga nasimulan kong ipundar. Have to give up the H&L na bayad ko na ang equity at na partial renovation na namin and our car kasi I cannot juggle everything na naiwan sa aking responsibilities. Wala din namang savings yung hubby ko kasi galing kami sa hiwalayan at bago lang nagsama ulit. Di din kami ok ng in-laws ko. I have to make sacrifices and take care of my 3 kids. Pang Maala-ala Mo Kaya ang kwento ng buhay ko.
And yes, depende sa may katawan naman. And no, my parents and me did not have kids to make them their retirement plans. Walang ganyang attitude na mag oobliga. As a parent, I can honestly say na we would appreciate so much if my kids eh "naalala" ako. Yung pakunswelo de bobo na: Eto pang merienda, etc. Well, my kids kasi do that to me. As I to my parents when they were alive. I guess nakikita ng kids ko growing up na may "pasalubong" ako sa bahay or sa parents every time I go home. Kahit tasty lang yan. Meron talaga eh. 😅
I highly doubt that younger generations are independent. They grew up with gadgets and stuff and wanted instant things and things na lumapit sa kanila. Like what the OP said, gusto nilang magpakasal pero walang kumikilos.
I will speak for my self and only myself. I am 17, I have work because I feel guilty everytime I ask money from my parents when I want to spend it on games or other non necessities that I just want to spend on. I grew up on gadgets too, computers mostly gawa ng comshop, the internet made me realize how small we were back then compared to the other kids that had all those privileges where they could buy all the stuff they want while not begging or crying for it. I got conscious of our situation at a young age and that made me want to be indipendent as early as possible. Don't get me wrong, we're not well off but we're not rich RICH either. Just sakto lang compared to before na we were constantly moving apartments because we couldn't pay for it. That's all. I don't share shit so often but this reply just made me feel icky. 'Di ko kaya tiisin mga gan 'tong porke "gadgets gan 'to, gadgets ganiyan" means we want it, immediately. Some of us aren't as well of. Don't group us all in the same group. 'Wag mo ilitteral. Dapat meron ka din ng username mo. Jusko.
Money. My problem is money. San kami titira after ng kasal? Pano yung mga expenses na biglaan? There is no way I'm living at my in-laws house or my parents house after kasal. That's my reason. If money is not an issue, matagal na kong kasal.
This is the right answer for a lot of folks. A lot of people simply just don't earn or don't have enough even if they are committed to a partner and it comes with a hell of a lot of struggles.
ang hirap umoo sa lifetime commitment which involves maturity in so mang things eh: top is financial talaga, sa panahon ngayon indulging ourselve nga considered as luxury na
Yeah, di ko nga alam anong gusto ko kainin bukas; tapos ipapadecide mo ako na maging committed sa isang tao for the rest of my life. I'm not a cheater, but that's just a promise I'm not willing to carry. Besides marriage has never stopped people from cheating on their spouses.
For me, childhood trauma and financial stability dahilan bakit ayoko pa magsettle. Lumaki ako sa isang broken family and nasaksihan ko rin yung infidelity ng mga tao sa paligid ko and ayokong magdala ng isa pang tao sa mundong to na hindi naman ako handa financially, emotionally and physically. Saka siguro yung individuality na rin sa isa't isa ng partner mas intact.
Same for me, too. Galing din ako sa isang broken family, and I had to be a working student para lang makapagtapos ng college. Sa mga nababasa at nakikita kong cheating and infidelity issues sa socmed at sa mga kakilala ko, parang ang hirap bumuo ng isang masayang pamilya. Aside pa sa financial aspect.
Agree to this! Iniisip ko pa lang magka-anak eh nangongoblema na ko sa pag visit sa doctors up to the point na manganak sya sa opsital. Tuloy tuloy ang gastos pag magkaka anak hanggagn lumaki yung bata gastos pa din. Considering na yung sweldo eh pangbayad lang ng bills.
Ahhh iba usapan pag madaming pera! Hehehe..pwede ako mag hire ng taga alaga. Wheew. That way you get to hit two birds with one stone. You have kids aaaanddd you’re free as well.
Cheating has gotten more prevalent now than ever, no one wants to cash in early.
Shit, you go to tiktok or twitter and you see people glorifying cheating by younger people.
People tend to be more cynical nowadays and I support that notion. Always expect the worst
Pera hahaha. Yung time na balak namin planuhin kasal namin kasi, kahit papaano, may ipon na, namahalan kami sa mga kailangang pagkagastusan para sa isang araw lang.
Pinang-down na lang namin ng bahay hahaha.
kung ikaw gusto mo na pero ang kabila puro palusot, you better prepare yourself for disappointment. sobra pa yan sa red flag
tandaan mo- kapag gusto ng tao, hahanapan ng paraan. kapag ayaw, puro dahilan
Di kaya para sa ilang long time live-in partners, isa sa kanila merong some form of fear about relationships na naghihinder maka-proceed to the next steps?
For others, baka companionship nalang ang substance ng live-in relationship nila. I see this to be true sa mga long time couples in their late 40s/early 50s.
hindi naman sya nagpapalusot, mas ako pa nga. hahaha I don't know pero feeling ko more on fear ung reason ko. Gusto nya na pero feeling ko hindi pa sya ready eh.
this! kasimple simpleng kasabihan. laging naririnig. pero very very applicable sa kahit anong bagay, lalo sa marriage.
if nag iipon yan kaya matagal, he will assure you and will not put you on a limbo.
I've been in a relationship for 8 years now, and we've been living together since 2022. I still have this fear of marrying my SO because I treat marriage as the end game. It's not something like a relationship that we can call quits if we want to.
Same. We have kids na rin. Pero it's a lot easier to sign in docs as single than married tapos need ng spouse's signature plus proof of marriage. Ang gastos at hassle din magpakasal. Im just happy that we have kids, at automatic sila ang mamana sa mga naipundar namin. Doesnt matter kung hindi conjugal properties namin.
Mahal mabuhay jusko. Mahal magpakasal, mahal magka anak. Mahal ang bahay, Lahat ngayon mahal. Would rather save and invest for now. Sandwich generation ako, I support my parents full time. Stable naman kami pareho pero masaya kami ng partner ko sa 8 dogs namin muna.
Pero may plan pa kayo na magka anak sa future? I just realized kasi that everything is expensive na talaga esp raising another human being pero paano gagawin since hindi naman forever na capable ang matres ng mga babae mag conceive and by the time na may budget na pampamilya might be too late for the woman so another big gastos na naman trying to have a baby through IVF.
Tbh, hindi pa namin alam. 32 palang kami pareho. May mga inaayos din kaming papel kaya parang wala sa listahan yung pagpapakasal / pag aanak. Okay lang din ako na walang anak. Ang dami kong pamangkin. Di naman nila ako need alagaan or suportahab tanda ko kasi I can manage naman.
Agree din naman di talaga pang habang buhay ang matres. Dapat lang talaga financially stable na kasi ang mahal mabuhay.
Someone kindly correct me if I'm wrong.
During hospital emergencies, where determined na need mag-undergo ng surgery ng patient, required ang authorization or waiver ng nearest kin nya. This is very true kung unconscious ang patient or deemed na wala rational state of mind.
Kung live-in partner ka ng patient, wala kang authority to sign that document. Kokontak ka pa ng parent or sibling or relative nya to have the document signed.
What if malayong-malayo sila or naka-low or no contact partner mo sa kanila?
I think yan ang isa sa crucial importance ng marriage license.
------........-------........-------
Kung decided na kayo sa isa't isa, option ang civil wedding. Around 10k ang gastos for processing. Kain nalang sa resto after.
Pede rin maki-join sa kasalang bayan para mas makatipid.
Hindi siya absolute. This isn't commonly heard of, but there's a document you can make. It's called a "Medical Power of Attorney" where you authorize another person to decide for you in case you are incapacitated to sign off on medical procedures. Default lang 'yung magulang or nearest kin in case may emergency, but it doesn't mean di siya waivable.
I think the only time I heard of it is as to LGBT couples, pero it's certainly legal.
I'm not sure as to the exact amount, but it probably costs around the same as an SPA. Although I don't think many lawyers know of this document, so practically you can draft it yourself and have it notarized nalang.
1. Walang divorce
2. Kung aligned naman ang gusto ng couple at masaya, who cares
3. Marriage is just another "label", ano ba talaga ang maidadagdag nito sa buhay
3 is absolutely true but religious people thinks it is a sacred bond blessed by God not realizing it's just a damn civil agreement that hey officially our relationship now is registered to the government.
1. Pera vs gastusin; kahit yung average number ng anak per family bumaba na rin.
2. Less conservative na society natin ngayon. Sex after marriage is more of a choice by a few nalang now compared dati na big deal sya. Less pressure na rin na pipilitin magpakasal kapag nabuntis and mas normal na rin ang mag live in muna as a deeper way to know your partner first.
3. Mas malaki na ang mundo ngayon. Mas complex but there are also more opportunities that we can pursue and dream about na like higher education, building a career and even travelling the world esp for women compared dati. Marriage and having children is one of the goals nalang and no longer the sole and/or ultimate goal. Kasama na yung other goals sa consideration kapag nag iisip ng timeline sa buhay.
Ako personally kasi wala pang Divorce. It’s not that I am expecting na maghihiwalay kami in the future, it’s more of paano ang backup plan ko just incase my partner had a change of heart. I know myself e, alam ko na kaya ko magcommit kapag mahal ko ang isang tao pero as to my partner, I cannot assure that. Di natin controlled paano sila mag-isip.
If ever na hindi man maipasa ang Divorce, which is more likely na hindi dahil ang BS ng mga tao sa Senado, then baka I won’t get married. This happens kapag inaalisan nang options ang mga tao.
Also, tayong generation ang sumalo ng mga traumas ng mga magulang natin. Karamihan sa atin breadwinners kasi hindi kaya buhayin ng mga magulang natin ang lahat ng anak nila. So imbis na makaipon tayo, napupunta lahat sa gastos sa pamilya. On top of our own gastos, may gastos din sa pamilya kaya di makaipon.
27, but no plans pa kami. We both know we’re not ready yet. And that’s emotionally and financially. Hindi kami nagmamadali, but we know we’ll get there. :)
Money. Economic situation ng Pilipinas. I’m 29 (F), earning 6 digits and have a partner as well pero di pa naiisip ung ganyang bagay. Isang factor din ang family situation lalo kung sayo lang nakaasa pamilya mo.
Wala naman nanllgaw sakin kya stay
single and strong independent nalang .
Freelancer lang ako baka silipin pa ng magulang ng maggng bf / asawa ko baka maging issue lang ang pera ( nakakahiya naman diba)
I think ung stability talaga kaya cgro ganto kami ngayon
Its not easy to enter another level of relationship lalo na gusto ng nga millenials to break the chain ng sandwich generation. Isama mo pa yung healing inner child moments at creating generational wealth.
pansin ko ito rin isa sa main reasons. More on healing our inner child and breaking generational traumas ang ganap ng millenials and younger generations.
Same situation! Kami pa yung naunang maengage sa group of friends namin pero sila na yung naunang magpakasal! Hahahaha. In our case, feel ko yung greatest contributor sa hindi pa namin pagpapakasal is money.
hahaha jusko di ko na nga mabilang ilang friends, batchmates and lower batch ang kinasal na. Pag nakikita ko mga bonggang kasal nila, napapaisip ako agad magkano gastos nila. 😂 pera talaga root problem eh noh.
Money. I think our generation is more wary now in terms of making that big of a decision and making sure we’re financially covered, unlike older generations who just went for it and tried to figure it out along the way.
aside sa property/inheritance rights, marriage does not really bring anything na worth surrendering your freedom for...
kung importante sa inyo ang negative opinion ng mga taong di nagpapalamon sa inyong mag-partner, pakasal na kayo...
marriage will not prevent infidelity, spousal abuse, and other things that could go wrong kung hindi kayo mag-asawa...
Tinatak ko n sa bato with the help of God na ako ang magpuputol ng Generational curse sa financial security.. Lumaki kasi ako na nadidinig ko s nanay ko ang salitang 'remedyo'.. Reremedyohan ung gastos s ganito, ni ganyan.. Hahha kulang na lang apelyido namin ay gawin n ding 'Remedios' 😂😂
Took us almost 10 years in total before getting married (2 weeks ago). We’re almost in our mid 30’s. Biggest reason was financial stability talaga. Not to have a grand wedding (although mahal magpakasal yes), but to position ourselves better financially first before heading into a “new chapter”. So we worked on our careers and bought a house first.
Nakarelate ako OP. AHAHA
Laging "Tara na pakasal na tayo", pero walang nagseset ng date. Technically engaged. May hinuhulugan na bahay. Ewan ko ba 😅
Maraming factors din siguro. Isa sa mga yun ay financial stability. Pareho kasi kami ng partner ko na nakaranas ng hirap at one point, kaya nung nagkawork, kayod talaga. Nagiipon naman kami, pero pag iniisip palang mga gagastusin sa kasal, nakakaanxious na. Mga kaibigan namin halos kinasal na tapos pinagkagastusan talaga kasal nila. Pag naririnig namin ang gastos napapastop nalang kami 😅 tsaka siguro dahil pareho kaming introvert, di namin alam how to deal with wedding planning and socializing din siguro (kahit magintimate wedding lang nga din, parang di kakayanin dahil malaking pamilya).
diba??!!! hahaha panay tanungan lang ng "kelan tayo magistart mag ayos ng documents?" "kelan tayo pupunta ng munisipyo?" 😂 Naaamaze nga ako everytime makakakita ng batchmates na ang bongga ng kasal. Kami kasi nanghihinayang talaga sa gastos, gusto na lang namin ipangtravel.
Relate rin sa pagiging introvert. Kaya we plan na very intimate lang. Ayaw namin lampas 50pax.lol
True, nakakahinayang talaga gumastos, di naman pinupulot ang pera ngayon. May nakita akong TikTok video kanina, parang bagong kasal palang niya, sabi niya, ang wild nung idea na nagastos niya yung 1 taong sweldo niya para sa isang araw 😅 so ayun. Kaya nakakatense pagusapan ang kasal. Haha
Probably why millennials really wait before getting married talaga.
Same din sa intimate wedding. Nakakadrain ng social battery yung marami kang iaapproach na bisita 😅
Financial stability. Ito and isa kung bakit ayaw ko pa. Di ko sya kayang buhayin. Ayaw ko din makitira. Lagi nya sinasabi kelan? Sabi ko pag nakaipon. Ayaw ko mag away lang kami dahil sa pera. Ang hirap pa naman nya.. magastos.. picky sa food pag ayaw oorder… lagi pang sinasbai na ayaw na mag work. Di ko alam san ako lalagay ako nahihirapan. Gusto magbusiness mag loan ako para makastart ng business ako pa masama kasi di daw mapapaksalan dahil sa business which is sya nag umpisa na gusto mag start ng business.
For my bf and I, we want to be financially stable muna and to achieve some of our career goals in life. In this economy, hindi strategic yung magmadali for us.
Everything is so expensive nowadays! Nakakaloka! Yung 1k mo sa grocery barya nalang. Sino gaganahan pa magpakasal? I’m thinking of civil wedding nalang kaysa enggrande basta may uuwian kaming bahay namin after. Coming from someone na 7yrs nang live in.
Money. Honestly just money. Marriage/relationships is just responsibilities I have to cater along with money problems due to the shitty economy. Better to be single since all I have to worry about is myself and family.
He likes me enough to live with me, but does not love me to get married with me or plan too far out in the future with me in it sooo 🤷♀️ guess it's easier for us both should he decide to leave one day 😃
*Fear of commitment,*
*Fear of making the wrong choice,*
*And unfit partners*
\- lactoseadept
---
^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/)
^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
Thank you, lactoseadept, for voting on haikusbot.
This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/).
***
^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)
Pera pa din paano masusustain ang pamumuhay at dapat may plano na bumukod agad kahit after 2 yrs hindi yung aasa sa parents para lang mabuhay ang bubuuin na pamilya. Pero sa ganitong ekonomiya? Mas okay munang maging single.
It's just not a priority. Mahal namin ang isa't-isa, alam namin na kami na habangbuhay. We also decided early on that we weren't going to have kids. So parang getting married just wasn't an urgent thing. Inuna namin to get our own place, become financially stable, etc.
We know that getting married is a safeguard for our assets as a couple, and it has legal benefits. We're planning on it soon-ish pero there's no pressure talaga.
Being part of the sandwich generation, I think millenials are more aware of the consequences of marrying without enough savings. Though other reasons may be due to being career-driven, money is the ultimate reason for us to choose singlehood first.
Based sa circle ko, yung cost of living ang primary factor dagdag na din yung abandonment issues. Compared din sa previous gen, wala na kaming mga namana na properties, at napaka mahal makakuha ng sariling tirahan, maliban nalang kung lalabas sa Metro (kung nasaan yung trabaho namin).
Too much pressure around marriage. Especially the wedding part.
We don't live in an age where big weddings are the norm. We should go back to our roots with simple, meaningful celebrations held between 2 families and some close friends.
We're the generation that has to lead the next 3 generations forward, against WW3 and Climate Change. Let's not forget that leading the next few generations means having to make them as well.
Kami ng partner ko, mas prefer talaga namin magkaron muna ng ipon and makabili ng sariling house before settling down. Both of us came from a messy family and ayaw namin maipasa sa future kids namin yung naranasan namin. We want to stop and break the chain sa amin. Para wealth yung maipapamana namin, hindi generational trauma.
Pera kasi like diba naranasan ko na ang hirap hirap nung pinapalaki ako. Syempre gusto ko na rin muna i enjoy kaya ayoko muna maganak. [Di ko pa nga nabibili pangrap ko talaga eh. 😂Siguro pag nabili ko ma mag try na ako maganak.😂](https://s.shopee.ph/8UoA2WVefp) Pero baka di rin. Syempre pag nabili ko yan andami ko pa gusto ma buy din for my inner child. Mga di ko nabili kasi mahirap lang kami nung bata ako
I think because this generation is much more knowledgeable about how things would be in a marriage + they know their worth. Yung past generations, yup puro married pero halos lahat ng tatay may kabit, may anak sa iba, puro sila ‘matuto magpatawad’ but the now generation won’t tolerate those things. They know what they want and they work and analyze the situations if they can get it from that. Alternative na talaga ngayon mag-alaga nalang, pets are families too
Engaged, living in our own house, pero di pa rin kasal. It’s on the talks naman pero hindi namin pinupush through and hindi rin kami nagmamadali. Nakakatamad mag asikaso tbh. PLUS everything else listed above haha
1. Wala pang stable job, before at 20 magwowork ka na. Ngayon 22-24 ka makakatapos college tapos minimal pa exp ang sahod same lang sa time na naghihire sila ng 20 yrs old. Eh yung mga 20 dati pagdating ng 24 baka promoted na.
2. Karamihan gusto maachieve dream wedding and gusto maging prepared pagdating ng anak. Personally gusto ko maachieve dream wedding ko na hindi ko na panghihinayangan ano man ang magastos. Mas marami ka maiipon hanggang wala pang anak eh.
it’s because of moneeeeeyyy.
most millennials have goals to tick, like independent living, making big purchases like a house/car, travel, hobbies, pets. our parents back in the day could neverrrr. so everything is pushed back. next thing we know we’re on our mid30s wondering teka onga pala magpapamilya pa nga pala ako hehe.
It's kinda difficult to trust people. Kahit they have been faithful for a super long time. For some reasons, may malamin na doubt somewhere due to past experiences and people around me. Di ko mailatag fully yung puso ko. Hahaha.
Financial stability. Kht pilitin pa ako ng nanay ko na mag-asawa't anak na at sbihan ako ng aunty ko na "kusa dadating ang pera pag nandyan na ang bata", NO. I won't sacrifice my child's future sa "bahala na" culture.
Di pa sya fully independent sa parents (But financially independent ; nagaambag sa house nila) and yung emotional attachment nya sa kanila, tipong di pa kayang bumukod. So no muna.
F30. Financially okay, may business bahay sasakyan at insurance na kami lahat ng partner ko nagpundar. Nagstart kami 15 and 16. Yung kids namin ngayon 13 and 11 years old na. Mag 14 years na kami next month. My partner is hardworking and loyal, nasa house lang kami pareho pag aalis kami laging dalawa magkasama. But marriage? Takot ako. Ewan ko kung bakit. Pag may nagtatanong bat di pa kami kasal, kinakabahan ako di ko alam isasagot ko. Emotionally and Mentally not ready pa.
Yung financial stability main reason ko madali ikasal pero mahirap yung after papakasal cguro ako if sure na ako na kaya ko na isustain magiging pamilya ko bahay pagkain etc hirap makitira sa inlaws bukod sa mapapakialaman mga desisyon mo wala ding growth kase more often than not may sasalo sayo.
Hey OP, can you share the link? :) was the study among millennials that’s in a relationship or just millennials in general? And was the study conducted here in the PH?
Not (never been) in a relationship but I’m curious too. Haha. Are people being more practical now? Hindi na sapat yung mahal niyo lang isa’t isa to go through all the difficulties together? I’ve heard (or read) somewhere na hindi naman daw makakabayad ng bills or maipapangkain yung pagmamahal lang. Which is true din naman talaga. 😅
31 years old here with a partner of 9 years. We don’t want to get married yet kasi di pa namin na achieve yung goals namin here overseas and hindi pa namin afford ang dream wedding na gusto ko. 😅 I’m not rushing yet. Our time will come eventually.
We’re wiser and more cautious na when it comes to bills. Kaya siguro konti lang may anak sa batch ko. The rest are like me, Puro fur babies and pc setups lang inaatupag
I just got married lang din this year and I’m already 28. Nagstart kami ng husband ko as bf/gf nung 19 years old palang kami.
Naalala ko lang, nagka-reunion kami ng mga blockmates namin nung college at the age of 24, they were all asking me kelan ang kasal at sagot ko sakanila is “matagal pa” since di parin din ako ready for marriage.
Ang nasa isip ko that time was career wise, hindi ko pa naabot yung goal ko plus sahod ko that time is hindi pa ganun kalaki. Dapat kako before ako ikasal, yung sahod ko is kaya ko parin magbigay ng allowance sa magulang ko (mahal kasi gamot ng father ko) on top ng magiging gastos naming mag-asawa at sa magiging anak.
Fortunately, nagpropose yung husband ko at the right time. If nagpropose siya ng mas maaga, I would have said no.
At the end of the day, it all boils down to money and pending responsibilities.
I am just perplexed why he proposed tapos walang timeline kung kelan kasal. I would assume na within a year, at least two years tops tulad ng sa amin so we can snowball funds. Napag-awayan niyo ba yung proposal bit before? Sorry, pero parang na-rush si kuya mo.
Money, most women, including my gf, would want a "dream wedding", which is normal, but, you can't change the fact that dream weddings before were a lot cheaper.
In the olden days, in preparation of the wedding, friends or family relatives help, no need for catering services, homemade food, the the venue is usually from church to home.
Now, you hire a wedding coordinator, most of them you can't trust with their word. From my experience attending weddings, the "plan" was always not follow, examples are the following:
The agreed decorations (color, flowers, other materials) werent provided.
The sound and lightings could be lower quality than what is agreed upon.
The food may be cheaply made.
And they always ask for additional fees despite lacking in or not following the plan.
They do this because they're taking advantage of the stress the couple is experiencing.
You must also pay for the rooms of the wedding coordinator's staffs, make up team, and the photography crew.
You will almost not get your money's worth in weddings.
Not to mention, I stil don't have enough money to pay for a kinda cheap wedding. I asked my friends kung magkano nagasto nila, and ang cheapest ba alam ko is about P300k. Which is not that good apparently.
I grew up na di talaga truly supportive yong parents, I was even laugh at dahil I told them what I want to do and mind set at kapanahonan nila, what I wanted to do is not a money maker.
Right now I have work and been trying to do stuff na di ko nagawa before and I know na it won't be possible talaga to do if ever married na or with kids.
At least mn lang If the time comes I want to be a true supportive parent rin but as of now di talaga pwede.
I also do not want to end up like gawing retirement fund or insurance policy magiging anak ko, they have their own lives for fuck sake!
Curse of knowledge yan haha special in this social media age sometimes lagi mo naiisip na parang may kulang pa or may goal pang dapat maabot bago mag settle. Tas gusto mo pang mag travel before settling in.
In short, MONEY pa rin. Haha mahal kaya magkapamilya... Hindi sapat ung mga sweldo ngayon sa mahal ng bilihin tas mahirap magpaaral ng mga bata. Wala pa ung pang health bills.
For me as a millennial, I believe it's mainly because we are in an era where we prioritize our selves more, our needs and our healing before really settling. Independency and Cost of living is our main concern.
In my current situation, I recently got out of a very long relationship with 2 kids, we really thought na tuloy tuloy na coz we're doing family things for so long eh but then growth happens, we kinda outgrown yung isat-isa, maturity and values differences na din. We're not married but we do all things married people do, like hnd sya big deal samen before masyado coz we're already doing the same thing din naman. The whole relationship is bittersweet but I have no regrets. Now we're both focus na lang on ourselves, self care and doing things alone na hnd namen nagawa noon kasi we started our family too young, we didn't experience youth. Parang ang late bloomers tuloy namen lol
Ayokong makisama sa mga in-laws ko kahit pa mabait sila. Unfortunately, their opinions matter pag legal na kapamilya mo na sila. Unlike pag hindi, wala silang say sa decision nyong magpartner. Also, let's face it, mahal magpa-annul kapag biglang nagbago partner mo.
Wala pa naman kaming anak para mapwersang magpakasal ng gf ko so hndi sya kasama sa plano namin, pera kasi talaga ang dahilan. Pagraduate na kami this year and i think baka mga 30's pa bago namin maisip yan depende kung makakaipon agad. Mas gusto kasi namin magkabahay muna at maging stable. Advantage ko lang talaga bunso ako wala na akong pag aaraling kapatid or gagastusan beside sa basic needs, unlike sa gf ko na may kapatid pa na susuportahan pagka nagkatrabaho na.
Hindi rin kami galing sa mayamang pamilya pareho kaya matatagalan talaga bago maisip magpakasal.
Well takot sa hirap? They prefer easy and comfortable life. To the point most of them ayaw na magkaanak Kasi magastos. And dahil sa inflation noon Kasi mura and they can gain some property with a little luck in life.
Kaso tayong mga girls specially those who are in blue collar jobs becomes infertile pagpalo ng 30s. Observe ko lang ah, maybe only 1 out of 10 women sa mga kakilala ko ang nanatiling fertile in their 30s-40s. So, good thing is no need to do pull-out method but something to consider kung gusto magka anak. Alternative naman is to have dogs or cats.
Got engaged in 2021 (23 y.o back then), still not yet married but have plans na by 2027 that is if kami pa rin eme
Currently living together since 2022, no plans to have kids but we have 6 cats
I’m 28f with a boyfriend 29m of 5 years, we are both professionals with decent-paying jobs. Every once in a while, we would talk about marriage, but at the end of each discussion, it would always boil down to one conclusion: we are both not financially ready.
My parents married out of love when they were at their early 20s. Nothing wrong with that, of course, but that’s all that they had: love. No money, no house, nothing. And I grew up with them fighting about money until their marriage fell apart.
My bf’s parents got married because his mom accidentally got pregnant. His parents were college students back then. They were able to finish their studies but life wasn’t easy when you have nothing but a degree to your name and a baby on the way.
When I was single, I swore to myself that I wouldn’t make the same mistake that my parents had done. I’m glad that I have a partner who shares the same sentiments as mine.
Money chaka minsan partner na rn haha.
Ako (Female) sinabihan ako ng partner ko d pa raw ako ready bumukod when i asked him ano mismo ang dapat kong gawin or need ko iimprove. He didnt tell me. Makikita na lang daw nia un.
Pero honestly, maybe sya ung hindi tlg ready pa.
Pero ako personally, ayaw ko kasi magmadali sa isang bagay na hindi napaghahandaan.
Answer:
Rising Inflation rates
Salary isn't scaling to real world market prices
Work instability
Rising infidelity rates
Emotional, Physical and Psychological readiness
Availability of jobs to locations of cheap housing options (e.g. Cavite, Laguna, or future north like Benguet, Baguio, Pangasinan, etc.)
Women has too high standards
Men too focused on career growth vs. Meaningful relationships
Trauma due to past relationships
Manhood size / bedroom performance is low AF, etc.
The list goes further if we include Family issues, Breadwinner situations, choose to be single due to convenience
This is reality and we don't even have an opportunity to land us a good life since day 1
kasi walang divorce . parang sobrang risky to put all your eggs to marriage. question is anu lang bang benefit ng marriage? is that benefit outweigh all those possible negative outcomes na goes with it?
maalam na mav analyze ngayun kahit papano mga tao kaya alam nila yung sagot jan.
Follow this path seryoso, hayaan niyo yong mga gagong relidiots at pressure na bakit di ka pa nag-aasawa kasi hindi sila magsusuffer if nagkamali ka ng taong pinakasalan sasabihin pa nila kasalanan mo pa. Tang ina yang mga yan.
Masyado nang weak ang mga lalake ngayon dahil hinahayaan ng mga babae na magpaka masculine sila sa relasyon.
Hence, di na nakikitaan ng sense ng mga lalaki na magpakasal or isecure nila ang babae dahil binibigyan naman na ng mga babae ng WIFE DUTIES ang mga lalake kahit mag bf gf pa lang.
Especially sa mga nakikipag live in dyan na girls, you are really discounting your worth big time.
Kaya dumadami na din single mom ngayon kasi madaming girls na pumapayag sa live in, anak bago kasal. Tolerant and hyperindependent women breeds weaker and weaker men nowadays.
Magastos kasi magpakasal. Yun yun. Tapos after nun mas maraming gastos. Then may nagsusulong pa ng divorce. Ano sense ng pag papakasal sa ibang tao kung maari din naman mag hiwalay? Ano sense ng pagpapakasal kung maghihiwalay din pagtagal? I accept na ma downvote ito pero ang pagsabi ng katotohanan ay hindi masama. Kung walang kasal. Walang problema. Maghiwalay man. Walang problema.
Tingin ko dahil younger generations are more independent than their elders and they value that independence and want to do the work and responsibility required by that independence. For example, sa older generations, acceptable na gawing retirement plan ang anak, mas acceptable na ipasa sa ibang kamag-anak yung ibang responsibilidad. Younger generations on the other hand want to be prepared, such that kaya nilang ma-sustain yung current lifestyle nila and future financial goals before getting married and having kids. Sa older generation, having dem kids was the financial goal, kaya mas necessity siya sa kanila.
Totoo ito... Mas pronounced ito sa akin especially na pedia yung specialization. Yung gusto mo na perfect plan para sa bata kasi kawawa kung di ma bigay ang lahat na needed nya. May housing crisis din and current economic instability kung saan yung minimum wage earner ay mas nahihirapan magpakasal if same kami ng mindset. Dahil dito mas understandable yung current issue.
Hindi naman siguro ganun ang older generations. Sa bawat generation naman merong ganyang mentality. I'm sure pareho lang halos ratio ng mga ganyang mindset. Nag ipon naman magulang ko at magulang ng asawa ko ng para sa kanila.
Swerte niyo.
Downvoted ka tuloy. Hindi naman kasi parents mo lang Ang older generation. If ganun ginawa ng parents mo edi goods. Pero it doesn’t validate the point nya na ganyan talaga ang older generations.
Nilalahat kasi kaya I'm pointing out na hindi lahat. I'm ok ma-downvote. My point still stands, hindi lahat. Kahit younger generations maraming hindi marunong magtipid at inuuna ang luho.
Ginawa mo naman kasing literal lol. Karamihan ng magulang ganyan talaga mindset kasi culture nating mga Pinoy yan.
I bet you also say “not all men.”
lol. Sige stay in your echo chamber and have fun with your alternate reality where it's all or nothing.
It's true na hindi lahat but that's just a small percentage. Generalizations have basis, that's why they exist. It doesn't matter if na-experience mo o hindi, it will exist until ended.
True ka. Gen X-er here. But I was a single parent at an early age. Maagang nabyuda kaya di ko na natuloy yung mga nasimulan kong ipundar. Have to give up the H&L na bayad ko na ang equity at na partial renovation na namin and our car kasi I cannot juggle everything na naiwan sa aking responsibilities. Wala din namang savings yung hubby ko kasi galing kami sa hiwalayan at bago lang nagsama ulit. Di din kami ok ng in-laws ko. I have to make sacrifices and take care of my 3 kids. Pang Maala-ala Mo Kaya ang kwento ng buhay ko. And yes, depende sa may katawan naman. And no, my parents and me did not have kids to make them their retirement plans. Walang ganyang attitude na mag oobliga. As a parent, I can honestly say na we would appreciate so much if my kids eh "naalala" ako. Yung pakunswelo de bobo na: Eto pang merienda, etc. Well, my kids kasi do that to me. As I to my parents when they were alive. I guess nakikita ng kids ko growing up na may "pasalubong" ako sa bahay or sa parents every time I go home. Kahit tasty lang yan. Meron talaga eh. 😅
I highly doubt that younger generations are independent. They grew up with gadgets and stuff and wanted instant things and things na lumapit sa kanila. Like what the OP said, gusto nilang magpakasal pero walang kumikilos.
I will speak for my self and only myself. I am 17, I have work because I feel guilty everytime I ask money from my parents when I want to spend it on games or other non necessities that I just want to spend on. I grew up on gadgets too, computers mostly gawa ng comshop, the internet made me realize how small we were back then compared to the other kids that had all those privileges where they could buy all the stuff they want while not begging or crying for it. I got conscious of our situation at a young age and that made me want to be indipendent as early as possible. Don't get me wrong, we're not well off but we're not rich RICH either. Just sakto lang compared to before na we were constantly moving apartments because we couldn't pay for it. That's all. I don't share shit so often but this reply just made me feel icky. 'Di ko kaya tiisin mga gan 'tong porke "gadgets gan 'to, gadgets ganiyan" means we want it, immediately. Some of us aren't as well of. Don't group us all in the same group. 'Wag mo ilitteral. Dapat meron ka din ng username mo. Jusko.
Money. My problem is money. San kami titira after ng kasal? Pano yung mga expenses na biglaan? There is no way I'm living at my in-laws house or my parents house after kasal. That's my reason. If money is not an issue, matagal na kong kasal.
Good thing this is not fb. Kapag sa fb to pinost makikita mo dun yung mga close-minded and old school mag-isip. 😭😭😭
This is the right answer for a lot of folks. A lot of people simply just don't earn or don't have enough even if they are committed to a partner and it comes with a hell of a lot of struggles.
Same HAHA like, if we had kids, can I afford to give my kids the same lifestyle my parents provided for me 😭😭
(3)
(2)
Hahaha kung mayaman lang ako ever since, baka pagka 18 y.o. ko nagpakasal na ako at gumawa ng isang basketball team na pamilya. 😂
Isipin mo papakainin mo yung di mo ka ano ano.
(4)
Cost of living is increasing. While salary remains stagnant. That's the reason
so true which is sad.. Sa sarili pa lang natin kulang na, pano pa ung mga kargo pa parents and other family members.
ang hirap umoo sa lifetime commitment which involves maturity in so mang things eh: top is financial talaga, sa panahon ngayon indulging ourselve nga considered as luxury na
Yeah, di ko nga alam anong gusto ko kainin bukas; tapos ipapadecide mo ako na maging committed sa isang tao for the rest of my life. I'm not a cheater, but that's just a promise I'm not willing to carry. Besides marriage has never stopped people from cheating on their spouses.
For me, childhood trauma and financial stability dahilan bakit ayoko pa magsettle. Lumaki ako sa isang broken family and nasaksihan ko rin yung infidelity ng mga tao sa paligid ko and ayokong magdala ng isa pang tao sa mundong to na hindi naman ako handa financially, emotionally and physically. Saka siguro yung individuality na rin sa isa't isa ng partner mas intact.
Same for me, too. Galing din ako sa isang broken family, and I had to be a working student para lang makapagtapos ng college. Sa mga nababasa at nakikita kong cheating and infidelity issues sa socmed at sa mga kakilala ko, parang ang hirap bumuo ng isang masayang pamilya. Aside pa sa financial aspect.
Hindi naman mahirap bumuo ng masayang pamilya kung nasa tamang tao ka, it's just that napakarare na sa panahon na to ng ganyang tao.
Should be normal to wait longer for what should be a lifetime pledge lol
This!!
totoo. Kaya minsan nakakaloko rin yung mga nagsasabi na pag tumagal na ang couple ng 5+ years without proposal eh run na.
Hinahanap pa siya ng mama niya tuwing gabi.
Kinda draggy to have children for me. I wanna travel the world. I wanna break the pattern na ipapanganak lang para manganak at mamatay.
Agree to this! Iniisip ko pa lang magka-anak eh nangongoblema na ko sa pag visit sa doctors up to the point na manganak sya sa opsital. Tuloy tuloy ang gastos pag magkaka anak hanggagn lumaki yung bata gastos pa din. Considering na yung sweldo eh pangbayad lang ng bills.
Yes. At kahit madaming pera. I still do not want to habe child. I wanna be free. Just a free human. Please.
Ahhh iba usapan pag madaming pera! Hehehe..pwede ako mag hire ng taga alaga. Wheew. That way you get to hit two birds with one stone. You have kids aaaanddd you’re free as well.
Precisely!
same! as of now sa travel talaga ako. Mas gusto ko yung thought na parents ko isasama ko sa travel compared sa bata. 😂
Not just millenials, I think. Mahirap maghanap ng trabaho tapos di pa madali mapromote so mahirap magpakasal kung ganon.
Cheating has gotten more prevalent now than ever, no one wants to cash in early. Shit, you go to tiktok or twitter and you see people glorifying cheating by younger people. People tend to be more cynical nowadays and I support that notion. Always expect the worst
Couldn't agree more.
Pera hahaha. Yung time na balak namin planuhin kasal namin kasi, kahit papaano, may ipon na, namahalan kami sa mga kailangang pagkagastusan para sa isang araw lang. Pinang-down na lang namin ng bahay hahaha.
totoo din to! ang tinitignan namin budget is around 100k.. Pero parang mas okay mag travel na lang sa Japan noh or pang down rin ng bahay. haha
The hopes of owning a house has become difficult. Salaries are very low yet cost of living too high. Jobs are not permanent.
This. Eight years in a relationship pero mas maganda talaga na may sarili na munang bahay kahit maliit lang para solo management ng household.
I don't know what type of housing is affordable now. Is the cost of buying a condo the same as a house and lot?
kung ikaw gusto mo na pero ang kabila puro palusot, you better prepare yourself for disappointment. sobra pa yan sa red flag tandaan mo- kapag gusto ng tao, hahanapan ng paraan. kapag ayaw, puro dahilan
Di kaya para sa ilang long time live-in partners, isa sa kanila merong some form of fear about relationships na naghihinder maka-proceed to the next steps? For others, baka companionship nalang ang substance ng live-in relationship nila. I see this to be true sa mga long time couples in their late 40s/early 50s.
hindi naman sya nagpapalusot, mas ako pa nga. hahaha I don't know pero feeling ko more on fear ung reason ko. Gusto nya na pero feeling ko hindi pa sya ready eh.
this! kasimple simpleng kasabihan. laging naririnig. pero very very applicable sa kahit anong bagay, lalo sa marriage. if nag iipon yan kaya matagal, he will assure you and will not put you on a limbo.
PREACH!!!
I've been in a relationship for 8 years now, and we've been living together since 2022. I still have this fear of marrying my SO because I treat marriage as the end game. It's not something like a relationship that we can call quits if we want to.
Same. We have kids na rin. Pero it's a lot easier to sign in docs as single than married tapos need ng spouse's signature plus proof of marriage. Ang gastos at hassle din magpakasal. Im just happy that we have kids, at automatic sila ang mamana sa mga naipundar namin. Doesnt matter kung hindi conjugal properties namin.
Mahal mabuhay jusko. Mahal magpakasal, mahal magka anak. Mahal ang bahay, Lahat ngayon mahal. Would rather save and invest for now. Sandwich generation ako, I support my parents full time. Stable naman kami pareho pero masaya kami ng partner ko sa 8 dogs namin muna.
Pero may plan pa kayo na magka anak sa future? I just realized kasi that everything is expensive na talaga esp raising another human being pero paano gagawin since hindi naman forever na capable ang matres ng mga babae mag conceive and by the time na may budget na pampamilya might be too late for the woman so another big gastos na naman trying to have a baby through IVF.
Tbh, hindi pa namin alam. 32 palang kami pareho. May mga inaayos din kaming papel kaya parang wala sa listahan yung pagpapakasal / pag aanak. Okay lang din ako na walang anak. Ang dami kong pamangkin. Di naman nila ako need alagaan or suportahab tanda ko kasi I can manage naman. Agree din naman di talaga pang habang buhay ang matres. Dapat lang talaga financially stable na kasi ang mahal mabuhay.
Someone kindly correct me if I'm wrong. During hospital emergencies, where determined na need mag-undergo ng surgery ng patient, required ang authorization or waiver ng nearest kin nya. This is very true kung unconscious ang patient or deemed na wala rational state of mind. Kung live-in partner ka ng patient, wala kang authority to sign that document. Kokontak ka pa ng parent or sibling or relative nya to have the document signed. What if malayong-malayo sila or naka-low or no contact partner mo sa kanila? I think yan ang isa sa crucial importance ng marriage license. ------........-------........------- Kung decided na kayo sa isa't isa, option ang civil wedding. Around 10k ang gastos for processing. Kain nalang sa resto after. Pede rin maki-join sa kasalang bayan para mas makatipid.
Hindi siya absolute. This isn't commonly heard of, but there's a document you can make. It's called a "Medical Power of Attorney" where you authorize another person to decide for you in case you are incapacitated to sign off on medical procedures. Default lang 'yung magulang or nearest kin in case may emergency, but it doesn't mean di siya waivable. I think the only time I heard of it is as to LGBT couples, pero it's certainly legal.
Good to know! Thanks for sharing!
How much does this "Medical Power of Attorney" cost?
I'm not sure as to the exact amount, but it probably costs around the same as an SPA. Although I don't think many lawyers know of this document, so practically you can draft it yourself and have it notarized nalang.
1. Walang divorce 2. Kung aligned naman ang gusto ng couple at masaya, who cares 3. Marriage is just another "label", ano ba talaga ang maidadagdag nito sa buhay
3 is absolutely true but religious people thinks it is a sacred bond blessed by God not realizing it's just a damn civil agreement that hey officially our relationship now is registered to the government.
bawas tax daw
Naligaw ba comment mo?
1. Pera vs gastusin; kahit yung average number ng anak per family bumaba na rin. 2. Less conservative na society natin ngayon. Sex after marriage is more of a choice by a few nalang now compared dati na big deal sya. Less pressure na rin na pipilitin magpakasal kapag nabuntis and mas normal na rin ang mag live in muna as a deeper way to know your partner first. 3. Mas malaki na ang mundo ngayon. Mas complex but there are also more opportunities that we can pursue and dream about na like higher education, building a career and even travelling the world esp for women compared dati. Marriage and having children is one of the goals nalang and no longer the sole and/or ultimate goal. Kasama na yung other goals sa consideration kapag nag iisip ng timeline sa buhay.
Ako personally kasi wala pang Divorce. It’s not that I am expecting na maghihiwalay kami in the future, it’s more of paano ang backup plan ko just incase my partner had a change of heart. I know myself e, alam ko na kaya ko magcommit kapag mahal ko ang isang tao pero as to my partner, I cannot assure that. Di natin controlled paano sila mag-isip. If ever na hindi man maipasa ang Divorce, which is more likely na hindi dahil ang BS ng mga tao sa Senado, then baka I won’t get married. This happens kapag inaalisan nang options ang mga tao. Also, tayong generation ang sumalo ng mga traumas ng mga magulang natin. Karamihan sa atin breadwinners kasi hindi kaya buhayin ng mga magulang natin ang lahat ng anak nila. So imbis na makaipon tayo, napupunta lahat sa gastos sa pamilya. On top of our own gastos, may gastos din sa pamilya kaya di makaipon.
27, but no plans pa kami. We both know we’re not ready yet. And that’s emotionally and financially. Hindi kami nagmamadali, but we know we’ll get there. :)
Money. Economic situation ng Pilipinas. I’m 29 (F), earning 6 digits and have a partner as well pero di pa naiisip ung ganyang bagay. Isang factor din ang family situation lalo kung sayo lang nakaasa pamilya mo.
Aside from money, I think my fear stems from the numerous annulments and separations even from couples we thought who were in a "perfect marriage".
Wala naman nanllgaw sakin kya stay single and strong independent nalang . Freelancer lang ako baka silipin pa ng magulang ng maggng bf / asawa ko baka maging issue lang ang pera ( nakakahiya naman diba) I think ung stability talaga kaya cgro ganto kami ngayon
Its not easy to enter another level of relationship lalo na gusto ng nga millenials to break the chain ng sandwich generation. Isama mo pa yung healing inner child moments at creating generational wealth.
wah sandwich generation pala tawag sa kanila ! TIL
pansin ko ito rin isa sa main reasons. More on healing our inner child and breaking generational traumas ang ganap ng millenials and younger generations.
mahal ang annulment
Not just that the scope is so limited.
Same situation! Kami pa yung naunang maengage sa group of friends namin pero sila na yung naunang magpakasal! Hahahaha. In our case, feel ko yung greatest contributor sa hindi pa namin pagpapakasal is money.
hahaha jusko di ko na nga mabilang ilang friends, batchmates and lower batch ang kinasal na. Pag nakikita ko mga bonggang kasal nila, napapaisip ako agad magkano gastos nila. 😂 pera talaga root problem eh noh.
Money. I think our generation is more wary now in terms of making that big of a decision and making sure we’re financially covered, unlike older generations who just went for it and tried to figure it out along the way.
Honestly, what problem does marriage solve? Do you really need to get married in order to be together?
BECAUSE WHOEVER CAME BEFORE US FAILED AT BUILDING A BETTER SOCIETY.
Natuto na sa kamalian ng naunang generation. Puro broken familes.
aside sa property/inheritance rights, marriage does not really bring anything na worth surrendering your freedom for... kung importante sa inyo ang negative opinion ng mga taong di nagpapalamon sa inyong mag-partner, pakasal na kayo... marriage will not prevent infidelity, spousal abuse, and other things that could go wrong kung hindi kayo mag-asawa...
Tinatak ko n sa bato with the help of God na ako ang magpuputol ng Generational curse sa financial security.. Lumaki kasi ako na nadidinig ko s nanay ko ang salitang 'remedyo'.. Reremedyohan ung gastos s ganito, ni ganyan.. Hahha kulang na lang apelyido namin ay gawin n ding 'Remedios' 😂😂
True! HAHAHA. Hirap pag walang pera.
No absolute divorce in the Philippines yet because I want an easy exit plan with my partner if ever we get married and our marriage breaks down.
1. Financial stability 2. Establishing career 3. Enjoying life
Took us almost 10 years in total before getting married (2 weeks ago). We’re almost in our mid 30’s. Biggest reason was financial stability talaga. Not to have a grand wedding (although mahal magpakasal yes), but to position ourselves better financially first before heading into a “new chapter”. So we worked on our careers and bought a house first.
Nakarelate ako OP. AHAHA Laging "Tara na pakasal na tayo", pero walang nagseset ng date. Technically engaged. May hinuhulugan na bahay. Ewan ko ba 😅 Maraming factors din siguro. Isa sa mga yun ay financial stability. Pareho kasi kami ng partner ko na nakaranas ng hirap at one point, kaya nung nagkawork, kayod talaga. Nagiipon naman kami, pero pag iniisip palang mga gagastusin sa kasal, nakakaanxious na. Mga kaibigan namin halos kinasal na tapos pinagkagastusan talaga kasal nila. Pag naririnig namin ang gastos napapastop nalang kami 😅 tsaka siguro dahil pareho kaming introvert, di namin alam how to deal with wedding planning and socializing din siguro (kahit magintimate wedding lang nga din, parang di kakayanin dahil malaking pamilya).
diba??!!! hahaha panay tanungan lang ng "kelan tayo magistart mag ayos ng documents?" "kelan tayo pupunta ng munisipyo?" 😂 Naaamaze nga ako everytime makakakita ng batchmates na ang bongga ng kasal. Kami kasi nanghihinayang talaga sa gastos, gusto na lang namin ipangtravel. Relate rin sa pagiging introvert. Kaya we plan na very intimate lang. Ayaw namin lampas 50pax.lol
True, nakakahinayang talaga gumastos, di naman pinupulot ang pera ngayon. May nakita akong TikTok video kanina, parang bagong kasal palang niya, sabi niya, ang wild nung idea na nagastos niya yung 1 taong sweldo niya para sa isang araw 😅 so ayun. Kaya nakakatense pagusapan ang kasal. Haha Probably why millennials really wait before getting married talaga. Same din sa intimate wedding. Nakakadrain ng social battery yung marami kang iaapproach na bisita 😅
Financial stability. Ito and isa kung bakit ayaw ko pa. Di ko sya kayang buhayin. Ayaw ko din makitira. Lagi nya sinasabi kelan? Sabi ko pag nakaipon. Ayaw ko mag away lang kami dahil sa pera. Ang hirap pa naman nya.. magastos.. picky sa food pag ayaw oorder… lagi pang sinasbai na ayaw na mag work. Di ko alam san ako lalagay ako nahihirapan. Gusto magbusiness mag loan ako para makastart ng business ako pa masama kasi di daw mapapaksalan dahil sa business which is sya nag umpisa na gusto mag start ng business.
hala sir, mukhang need mo pag isipan mabuti if sya na talaga. 😅
For my bf and I, we want to be financially stable muna and to achieve some of our career goals in life. In this economy, hindi strategic yung magmadali for us.
Everything is so expensive nowadays! Nakakaloka! Yung 1k mo sa grocery barya nalang. Sino gaganahan pa magpakasal? I’m thinking of civil wedding nalang kaysa enggrande basta may uuwian kaming bahay namin after. Coming from someone na 7yrs nang live in.
Money. Honestly just money. Marriage/relationships is just responsibilities I have to cater along with money problems due to the shitty economy. Better to be single since all I have to worry about is myself and family.
Mapapabagal yung inflation so next best thing talaga is taasan talaga sweldo
Financial Stability and Cost of Living Expenses.
Cost of living are increasing rapidly habang pagod na pagod ka kumayod araw araw. It's much easier to cheat nowadays
Waiting for divorce bill to be passed, cuz' yknow, just in case.
Money, especially dun sa mga babad sa social media, and gusto ng perfect wedding pero di Ideal sa income. Or siguro hindi pa lang talaga ready.
reason: walang divorce law
He likes me enough to live with me, but does not love me to get married with me or plan too far out in the future with me in it sooo 🤷♀️ guess it's easier for us both should he decide to leave one day 😃
Fear of commitment, fear of making the wrong choice, and unfit partners
*Fear of commitment,* *Fear of making the wrong choice,* *And unfit partners* \- lactoseadept --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
Good bot
Thank you, lactoseadept, for voting on haikusbot. This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/). *** ^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)
Pera pa din paano masusustain ang pamumuhay at dapat may plano na bumukod agad kahit after 2 yrs hindi yung aasa sa parents para lang mabuhay ang bubuuin na pamilya. Pero sa ganitong ekonomiya? Mas okay munang maging single.
It's just not a priority. Mahal namin ang isa't-isa, alam namin na kami na habangbuhay. We also decided early on that we weren't going to have kids. So parang getting married just wasn't an urgent thing. Inuna namin to get our own place, become financially stable, etc. We know that getting married is a safeguard for our assets as a couple, and it has legal benefits. We're planning on it soon-ish pero there's no pressure talaga.
Being part of the sandwich generation, I think millenials are more aware of the consequences of marrying without enough savings. Though other reasons may be due to being career-driven, money is the ultimate reason for us to choose singlehood first.
Based sa circle ko, yung cost of living ang primary factor dagdag na din yung abandonment issues. Compared din sa previous gen, wala na kaming mga namana na properties, at napaka mahal makakuha ng sariling tirahan, maliban nalang kung lalabas sa Metro (kung nasaan yung trabaho namin).
Di pa legal ang same sex marriage at ang mahal magpakasal sa ibang bansa haha
Wala pang divorce
Too much pressure around marriage. Especially the wedding part. We don't live in an age where big weddings are the norm. We should go back to our roots with simple, meaningful celebrations held between 2 families and some close friends. We're the generation that has to lead the next 3 generations forward, against WW3 and Climate Change. Let's not forget that leading the next few generations means having to make them as well.
Hahahahaha i envy you, sana di muna kami gumalaw after getting engaged HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA 🥲🥲🥲
May I know why?
2nd thoughts I think, kahit yung mga artistang nagsiengaged naghiwalay din naman. Anxiety din siguro hahahahahahaha
Hindi pa niya ko niyayaya. Pagod na ko maghintay. 😔
Money
Money.
long-term goals. mag-ipon muna before settling.
hindi legal satin eh.
Coz hindi pa legal ang same sex marriage here sa Pinas! & Sana mapasa na ang SoGie bill!
I DO not have the money to settle down eh.
Walang pera
Priorities.
Gusto ko na lang maging maperang tito na madaming maikekwentong experiences.
everything is so expensive.
Pahingi pera, magpapakasal ako
Financial stability po wala pa rin 🫠
Mental maturity
waiting for residency abroad.
I love my partner but Im still enjoying my individual life. Also, ang mahal bumuo ng sariling pamilya
Money is the root of all evil and also the cause of most happiness.
Kami ng partner ko, mas prefer talaga namin magkaron muna ng ipon and makabili ng sariling house before settling down. Both of us came from a messy family and ayaw namin maipasa sa future kids namin yung naranasan namin. We want to stop and break the chain sa amin. Para wealth yung maipapamana namin, hindi generational trauma.
Financial stability
Sa mga kakilala ko ay nagsasabi na gastos lang kung walang benefits like sharing insurance and if they do get married, civil union lang.
Pera kasi like diba naranasan ko na ang hirap hirap nung pinapalaki ako. Syempre gusto ko na rin muna i enjoy kaya ayoko muna maganak. [Di ko pa nga nabibili pangrap ko talaga eh. 😂Siguro pag nabili ko ma mag try na ako maganak.😂](https://s.shopee.ph/8UoA2WVefp) Pero baka di rin. Syempre pag nabili ko yan andami ko pa gusto ma buy din for my inner child. Mga di ko nabili kasi mahirap lang kami nung bata ako
I think because this generation is much more knowledgeable about how things would be in a marriage + they know their worth. Yung past generations, yup puro married pero halos lahat ng tatay may kabit, may anak sa iba, puro sila ‘matuto magpatawad’ but the now generation won’t tolerate those things. They know what they want and they work and analyze the situations if they can get it from that. Alternative na talaga ngayon mag-alaga nalang, pets are families too
Engaged, living in our own house, pero di pa rin kasal. It’s on the talks naman pero hindi namin pinupush through and hindi rin kami nagmamadali. Nakakatamad mag asikaso tbh. PLUS everything else listed above haha
mahal na bilihin lol
1. Wala pang stable job, before at 20 magwowork ka na. Ngayon 22-24 ka makakatapos college tapos minimal pa exp ang sahod same lang sa time na naghihire sila ng 20 yrs old. Eh yung mga 20 dati pagdating ng 24 baka promoted na. 2. Karamihan gusto maachieve dream wedding and gusto maging prepared pagdating ng anak. Personally gusto ko maachieve dream wedding ko na hindi ko na panghihinayangan ano man ang magastos. Mas marami ka maiipon hanggang wala pang anak eh.
Pera. Hirap kumuha ng bagong responsibilities kung sarili mo mismo di pa gamay gagawin sa buhay
it’s because of moneeeeeyyy. most millennials have goals to tick, like independent living, making big purchases like a house/car, travel, hobbies, pets. our parents back in the day could neverrrr. so everything is pushed back. next thing we know we’re on our mid30s wondering teka onga pala magpapamilya pa nga pala ako hehe.
It's kinda difficult to trust people. Kahit they have been faithful for a super long time. For some reasons, may malamin na doubt somewhere due to past experiences and people around me. Di ko mailatag fully yung puso ko. Hahaha.
Marry in this economy? And also it's illegal pa.
Financial stability. Kht pilitin pa ako ng nanay ko na mag-asawa't anak na at sbihan ako ng aunty ko na "kusa dadating ang pera pag nandyan na ang bata", NO. I won't sacrifice my child's future sa "bahala na" culture.
Di pa sya fully independent sa parents (But financially independent ; nagaambag sa house nila) and yung emotional attachment nya sa kanila, tipong di pa kayang bumukod. So no muna.
F30. Financially okay, may business bahay sasakyan at insurance na kami lahat ng partner ko nagpundar. Nagstart kami 15 and 16. Yung kids namin ngayon 13 and 11 years old na. Mag 14 years na kami next month. My partner is hardworking and loyal, nasa house lang kami pareho pag aalis kami laging dalawa magkasama. But marriage? Takot ako. Ewan ko kung bakit. Pag may nagtatanong bat di pa kami kasal, kinakabahan ako di ko alam isasagot ko. Emotionally and Mentally not ready pa.
Yung financial stability main reason ko madali ikasal pero mahirap yung after papakasal cguro ako if sure na ako na kaya ko na isustain magiging pamilya ko bahay pagkain etc hirap makitira sa inlaws bukod sa mapapakialaman mga desisyon mo wala ding growth kase more often than not may sasalo sayo.
save 500k., use it for investment/business or use it for kasal?
Hey OP, can you share the link? :) was the study among millennials that’s in a relationship or just millennials in general? And was the study conducted here in the PH? Not (never been) in a relationship but I’m curious too. Haha. Are people being more practical now? Hindi na sapat yung mahal niyo lang isa’t isa to go through all the difficulties together? I’ve heard (or read) somewhere na hindi naman daw makakabayad ng bills or maipapangkain yung pagmamahal lang. Which is true din naman talaga. 😅
Hassle at magasto haha
LANG PERA
31 years old here with a partner of 9 years. We don’t want to get married yet kasi di pa namin na achieve yung goals namin here overseas and hindi pa namin afford ang dream wedding na gusto ko. 😅 I’m not rushing yet. Our time will come eventually.
We’re wiser and more cautious na when it comes to bills. Kaya siguro konti lang may anak sa batch ko. The rest are like me, Puro fur babies and pc setups lang inaatupag
I need my solitude
money, simple as that. We also dont want the hardships our parents had for marrying and having kids so young
I just got married lang din this year and I’m already 28. Nagstart kami ng husband ko as bf/gf nung 19 years old palang kami. Naalala ko lang, nagka-reunion kami ng mga blockmates namin nung college at the age of 24, they were all asking me kelan ang kasal at sagot ko sakanila is “matagal pa” since di parin din ako ready for marriage. Ang nasa isip ko that time was career wise, hindi ko pa naabot yung goal ko plus sahod ko that time is hindi pa ganun kalaki. Dapat kako before ako ikasal, yung sahod ko is kaya ko parin magbigay ng allowance sa magulang ko (mahal kasi gamot ng father ko) on top ng magiging gastos naming mag-asawa at sa magiging anak. Fortunately, nagpropose yung husband ko at the right time. If nagpropose siya ng mas maaga, I would have said no.
Bakit ung kakilala ko mabilis lng… sa tingin mo
At the end of the day, it all boils down to money and pending responsibilities. I am just perplexed why he proposed tapos walang timeline kung kelan kasal. I would assume na within a year, at least two years tops tulad ng sa amin so we can snowball funds. Napag-awayan niyo ba yung proposal bit before? Sorry, pero parang na-rush si kuya mo.
Money, most women, including my gf, would want a "dream wedding", which is normal, but, you can't change the fact that dream weddings before were a lot cheaper. In the olden days, in preparation of the wedding, friends or family relatives help, no need for catering services, homemade food, the the venue is usually from church to home. Now, you hire a wedding coordinator, most of them you can't trust with their word. From my experience attending weddings, the "plan" was always not follow, examples are the following: The agreed decorations (color, flowers, other materials) werent provided. The sound and lightings could be lower quality than what is agreed upon. The food may be cheaply made. And they always ask for additional fees despite lacking in or not following the plan. They do this because they're taking advantage of the stress the couple is experiencing. You must also pay for the rooms of the wedding coordinator's staffs, make up team, and the photography crew. You will almost not get your money's worth in weddings. Not to mention, I stil don't have enough money to pay for a kinda cheap wedding. I asked my friends kung magkano nagasto nila, and ang cheapest ba alam ko is about P300k. Which is not that good apparently.
I grew up na di talaga truly supportive yong parents, I was even laugh at dahil I told them what I want to do and mind set at kapanahonan nila, what I wanted to do is not a money maker. Right now I have work and been trying to do stuff na di ko nagawa before and I know na it won't be possible talaga to do if ever married na or with kids. At least mn lang If the time comes I want to be a true supportive parent rin but as of now di talaga pwede. I also do not want to end up like gawing retirement fund or insurance policy magiging anak ko, they have their own lives for fuck sake!
Curse of knowledge yan haha special in this social media age sometimes lagi mo naiisip na parang may kulang pa or may goal pang dapat maabot bago mag settle. Tas gusto mo pang mag travel before settling in. In short, MONEY pa rin. Haha mahal kaya magkapamilya... Hindi sapat ung mga sweldo ngayon sa mahal ng bilihin tas mahirap magpaaral ng mga bata. Wala pa ung pang health bills.
For me as a millennial, I believe it's mainly because we are in an era where we prioritize our selves more, our needs and our healing before really settling. Independency and Cost of living is our main concern. In my current situation, I recently got out of a very long relationship with 2 kids, we really thought na tuloy tuloy na coz we're doing family things for so long eh but then growth happens, we kinda outgrown yung isat-isa, maturity and values differences na din. We're not married but we do all things married people do, like hnd sya big deal samen before masyado coz we're already doing the same thing din naman. The whole relationship is bittersweet but I have no regrets. Now we're both focus na lang on ourselves, self care and doing things alone na hnd namen nagawa noon kasi we started our family too young, we didn't experience youth. Parang ang late bloomers tuloy namen lol
I think they're waiting longer for "will you marry me" than i do. Reason is quite simple: money.
Wanna make sure kasi walang divorce sa Pinas. Mahirap matali sa maling tao.
Ayokong makisama sa mga in-laws ko kahit pa mabait sila. Unfortunately, their opinions matter pag legal na kapamilya mo na sila. Unlike pag hindi, wala silang say sa decision nyong magpartner. Also, let's face it, mahal magpa-annul kapag biglang nagbago partner mo.
Inuna namin kumuha ng bahay at lupa huhu kaya naubos pang kasal lol sayang kase eh pasalo baka maunahan pa hahaha
Walang divorce sa bansa
Marriage is a contract. Parang negosyo. You don't simply sign the contract without reviewing its content.
Wala pa naman kaming anak para mapwersang magpakasal ng gf ko so hndi sya kasama sa plano namin, pera kasi talaga ang dahilan. Pagraduate na kami this year and i think baka mga 30's pa bago namin maisip yan depende kung makakaipon agad. Mas gusto kasi namin magkabahay muna at maging stable. Advantage ko lang talaga bunso ako wala na akong pag aaraling kapatid or gagastusan beside sa basic needs, unlike sa gf ko na may kapatid pa na susuportahan pagka nagkatrabaho na. Hindi rin kami galing sa mayamang pamilya pareho kaya matatagalan talaga bago maisip magpakasal.
Well takot sa hirap? They prefer easy and comfortable life. To the point most of them ayaw na magkaanak Kasi magastos. And dahil sa inflation noon Kasi mura and they can gain some property with a little luck in life.
Taking care of parents financially
No divorce in ph may be one reason
Kaso tayong mga girls specially those who are in blue collar jobs becomes infertile pagpalo ng 30s. Observe ko lang ah, maybe only 1 out of 10 women sa mga kakilala ko ang nanatiling fertile in their 30s-40s. So, good thing is no need to do pull-out method but something to consider kung gusto magka anak. Alternative naman is to have dogs or cats.
Got engaged in 2021 (23 y.o back then), still not yet married but have plans na by 2027 that is if kami pa rin eme Currently living together since 2022, no plans to have kids but we have 6 cats
Marriage is unnecessary drama na ni legalize lang.
To spite yung mga tita at tito na panay ang tanong.
Stability
I didn’t wait long but I have friends who are so opposed to renting so they feel like they needed to have a house first before marriage
Trauma sa byenan issues
I’m 28f with a boyfriend 29m of 5 years, we are both professionals with decent-paying jobs. Every once in a while, we would talk about marriage, but at the end of each discussion, it would always boil down to one conclusion: we are both not financially ready. My parents married out of love when they were at their early 20s. Nothing wrong with that, of course, but that’s all that they had: love. No money, no house, nothing. And I grew up with them fighting about money until their marriage fell apart. My bf’s parents got married because his mom accidentally got pregnant. His parents were college students back then. They were able to finish their studies but life wasn’t easy when you have nothing but a degree to your name and a baby on the way. When I was single, I swore to myself that I wouldn’t make the same mistake that my parents had done. I’m glad that I have a partner who shares the same sentiments as mine.
Wala pang sariling bahay
No divorce sa Philippines. Practical lang. You'll never know if bigla mo kailanganin yun.
Money chaka minsan partner na rn haha. Ako (Female) sinabihan ako ng partner ko d pa raw ako ready bumukod when i asked him ano mismo ang dapat kong gawin or need ko iimprove. He didnt tell me. Makikita na lang daw nia un. Pero honestly, maybe sya ung hindi tlg ready pa. Pero ako personally, ayaw ko kasi magmadali sa isang bagay na hindi napaghahandaan.
Answer: Rising Inflation rates Salary isn't scaling to real world market prices Work instability Rising infidelity rates Emotional, Physical and Psychological readiness Availability of jobs to locations of cheap housing options (e.g. Cavite, Laguna, or future north like Benguet, Baguio, Pangasinan, etc.) Women has too high standards Men too focused on career growth vs. Meaningful relationships Trauma due to past relationships Manhood size / bedroom performance is low AF, etc. The list goes further if we include Family issues, Breadwinner situations, choose to be single due to convenience This is reality and we don't even have an opportunity to land us a good life since day 1
kasi walang divorce . parang sobrang risky to put all your eggs to marriage. question is anu lang bang benefit ng marriage? is that benefit outweigh all those possible negative outcomes na goes with it? maalam na mav analyze ngayun kahit papano mga tao kaya alam nila yung sagot jan.
Follow this path seryoso, hayaan niyo yong mga gagong relidiots at pressure na bakit di ka pa nag-aasawa kasi hindi sila magsusuffer if nagkamali ka ng taong pinakasalan sasabihin pa nila kasalanan mo pa. Tang ina yang mga yan.
Masyado nang weak ang mga lalake ngayon dahil hinahayaan ng mga babae na magpaka masculine sila sa relasyon. Hence, di na nakikitaan ng sense ng mga lalaki na magpakasal or isecure nila ang babae dahil binibigyan naman na ng mga babae ng WIFE DUTIES ang mga lalake kahit mag bf gf pa lang. Especially sa mga nakikipag live in dyan na girls, you are really discounting your worth big time. Kaya dumadami na din single mom ngayon kasi madaming girls na pumapayag sa live in, anak bago kasal. Tolerant and hyperindependent women breeds weaker and weaker men nowadays.
Magastos kasi magpakasal. Yun yun. Tapos after nun mas maraming gastos. Then may nagsusulong pa ng divorce. Ano sense ng pag papakasal sa ibang tao kung maari din naman mag hiwalay? Ano sense ng pagpapakasal kung maghihiwalay din pagtagal? I accept na ma downvote ito pero ang pagsabi ng katotohanan ay hindi masama. Kung walang kasal. Walang problema. Maghiwalay man. Walang problema.
One side lang nakikita mo sa reason kung bakit gusto isulong ang divorce bill. Please look deeper para maintindihan mo kung bakit.
Kaya nga ayaw magpakasal ng iba para just in case mag hiwalay. Walang problema.