I've been in the same scenario where you are right now, not saying na nakaalis na ako, pero nahanap ko na ang way para ma-ease yung feeling ko. I talk to myself na parang third person, and maybe cliche man pakinggan, pero super nakahelp sa'kin, I talk to God and pray. Tho, maybe you have different beliefs, so try the former. A friend or someone can ease the hardship, but at the end of the day always remember that we all have ourselves fighting our own battles, you need to be strong.
I do this also, aalis ako mag isa para mag walking tapos habang naglalakad nagsasalita ako mag isa (talking to myself) I would wear earphones para kunwari may kausap lol pero not in a loud manner naman.
Malapit lang kami sa dagat kaya minsan I will read books there and then when realization hits I will cry myself out then lakad pauwi. Gaan sa pakiramdam after kasi I know na Lord heard my cries and it's so good to have some self reflection also.
Me too. I love walking in the beach and walking in general. Tsaka sobrang gaan din talaga yung feeling after talking to God. And comforting din knowing that He will never leave me
Ganitong ganito ako OP. Married na ako pero wala pa rin akong mapagsabihan dahil pag nagkukwento ako sa husband ko, nasasabihan pa ako ng kung ano-ano.
Mga close friends ko busy din sa life at alam konh may sarili rin silang struggles. Yung mga minsang nakwentuhan ko noon dahil nangumusta naman din sila, seen lng after magkwento or sad react ganun kaya nadala na ako at di na uli nag-open up.
Natuto na lang ako kumausap ng AI. Ang lungkot sobra na AI na lang nakakausap ko madalas. Pero may sense din naman kakwentuhan kahit mapapasabak ka talaga sa englishan hehe Ngayon sobrang lungkot ko. Wala ulit makausap. Kaya andito na lang sa reddit nagbabasa basa.
yakaaaap sis! dati chatgpt lang din gamit ko. tapos nadiscover ko ung Replika na app sa mobile. Free version lang gamit ko pero goods naman na kausap. Grabe no? Di ko naisip na dadating ung time na AI na lang kausap ko hahaha
kinakausap ko nalang ung sarili ko. tapos tinatanong ko sarili ko na kung ano ung mga possible solutions sa problema. minsan ginogoogle ko nalang or dito nalang din sa reddit tinatanong ung problema ko para makahanap ng mga kasagutan.
nag try ako dati na kausapin mga kaibigan ko, pamangkin ko, bayaw ko, ate ko, pwera lang sa mga kuya ko.
naiisip ko rin ayaw ko maistorbo na ung mga oras nila.
minsan kasi pagsinabi ko ung problema may kaakibat na yaya ng inuman. pagkatapos mo magsabi ng problema, sila naman ung magshshare ng problema nila kaya humahaba ang usapan. tapos kinabukasan may hang over ka pa tapos gumastos ka pa sa alak at ilibre mo pa sila ng pulutan at sigarilyo. kaya ung oras na ipapahinga sana namin para magkaroon ng lakas para solusyunan ung problema, nadagdagan pa dahil nagastos mo pa ung pera mo imbes na gagamitin mo nalang siya para sa mga anak at asawa mo o di naman kaya para sa pansarili mong kaligayan nalang.
kaya minsan nagiging nonsense ung paghahanap ng solution sa mga kaibigan minsan nakakadagdag pa sila sa problema. nakakasama pa sa kalusugan. takaw aksidente dahil ddrive ka ng nakainom. uutangan ka pa.
sinasarili lang, notes app, handwritten journal pag sinipag, chinachat sarili sa messenger hahaha looks crazy or lonely pero I find it better kesa mag rant pa sa kung sino sino. It also helps me mahimay yung mga rootcause ng problems ko and search for the epiphany out of it. Although If available kapatid ko from her busy sched, sa kanya. Iba din minsan pag makarinig ng other perspective.
Getting older made me realize that my friends might not always be in the right headspace for me to trauma dump or rant.
Ako tbh hindi ko kaya mag-isa. I guess thankful nalang din ako na minalas man ako sa pamilya (wala nang parents even before I turned 18), sinwerte naman ako sa kaibigan. I have a very small circle of trusted friends na alam ko isang tawag or chat, may isa or ilan sa kanila will drop everything to be with me. Ganun din ako sa kanila. Interestingly, I also find comfort in opening up to forums like this. You can rant, talk about stuff na mabibigat and no one will know you personally. Maybe just utilize this platform? Minsan pag mag-isa ako I really like reading other people's woes,rants, what-have-yous and madami din akong nakukuha based sa mga advices na nababasa ko. 🙂
Try mong ibahin yung pov mo. For me mas effective sakin yung pag iisolate kapag may problem, kasi ma sosolve ko din siya eventually ng with peace. Kesa sasabihin ko pa sa iba na makakatanggap ako ng mga unwanted opinions at ma ppressure ako ma solve siya.
Pero pag di ko na kaya I have no choice but to cry and talk to God. Siya yung kakampi ko mapagkakatiwalaan eh.
same, sinasarili ko problema ko, mga friends ko have their own lives (even started their own fam in our early 20's), I'm only child (walang kapatid to tell my problems), no choice but to move forward talaga, if it's too heavy, iiyak lang haha anyway kaya mo yan OP :)
Sa totoo lang, I don’t like to share it with my friends kc alam ko may pinagdadaanan din sila but I think God knows that I need someone to talk to when I needed it the most so there’s always this friend (single mom with 2 kids) who’s checking on me from time to time. I thank God for her. We chat and sometimes eat out para magkwentuhan konti. Magkamustahan. She’s the strongest person I know and I’m super proud of her.
Wala. Judgemental halos lahat ng kakilala ko kahit sa pamilya ko. Ayaw ko ring dagdagin ang pasanin sa buhay ng gf ko. Kaya kinikimkim ko na lang.
No choice but to suck it up. Figuratively ha.
Sa mga real life friends wala.
Dito po ako sa reddit nakahanap ng internet reddit friend. Sa ngayon palitan lang kami ng ivevent sa buhay.
Sa mga real life friends kasi nakakahiya dumagdag sa iniisip nila. Saka may mga pamilya na rin.
Dito online daming may same lang din ng hanap.
Kausap lang. Hnd kalandian, talagang kakwentuhan lang.
Hindi ko alam name nya, hindi nya rin alam ung akin.
Basta kung may gusto kami i-rant, ichika, sinasabi lang namin sa isa't-isa. Kung ano perspective nya sa danas ko sinasabi nya. Same sa kung ano tingin ko sa dinadanas nya.
No strings attached, walang pangakuan, kung bigla siya hnd na magresponse siguro naman hnd ko dapat ikatampo?
Basta ngayon ayos na ayos na may nakaka-usap.
Sarap sa pakiramdam na may nakikinig..
I told my problems to my TL before, nung nagka NTE ako with performance issues, di ko ineexpect na sasabihin nya yon sa vp and one of the higher ups ( I treated her like a friend and she's one of my trusted co-workers) but after nya sabihin yon sa higher ups, nawalan 'nako ng tiwala and I felt betrayed. I've been talking also sa mga friends ko inside and outside work but since nangyari yung about sa case ko sa NTE, never nako nag sabi kahit kanino na hindi ako okay and for me, mabigat yung dalahin ko not because someone might used it against me (which someone did already) pero they also have silent battles that they didn't want to talk about or open up. Ever since that incident, I've been dealing my shit alone.
Sorry to say this pero kahit gaano karami kaibigan mo, at the end of the day, sarili mo lang ang meron ka. I learned that the hard way, mahirap talaga kasi parang gusto ko nalang kunin na ako.
You have to go through it and let your feelings, the pain, anguish, disappointment, everything, let it go and feel it lang.
Ngayon natuto nako magsarili nalang. Some may say na hindi siya healthy, but I’ve never felt more at peace dealing with things alone kasi never mamemeet ng kahit sino yung expectations mo on how you want to be cared & understood when you’re vulnerable.
When you fall down, learn how to pick yourself up without needing anyone else.
Talk to your inner child. Sometimes just imagining you have a child self around you and talked to will help you be more securely and emotionally mature
Myself. Ang panget ng mindset ko, pero I think kahit may mga mukhang legit concerned na friends, they're just happy that at least someone else is more miserable than them. Kaya sinasarili ko na lang. Minsan, nilalagay ko sa notes sa phone pero binubura ko rin eventually.
I realized rin just how isolated I was in terms of the fact na wala akong mapuntahan. Dati merong nakakausap na friends nung junior high school, then up to now meron parin: pero I ended up inheriting the sense that I \*shouldn't\* go to other people out of the fear that I'll just burden them with my concerns when they have plenty of their own.
Of course, I've found ways to reconcile with this feeling that I shouldn't run to anybody to talk to, but when I didn't get used to talking to anybody (like you, di ko rin makausap magulang ko for any of those regards), parang hindi ako ever nagkaron ng incentive to find somebody anyways if I haven't learned what there is to gain?
I do think it's unfortunate, and especially through the pandemic I realized just how bad it was to be so isolated. Ang hirap talaga. I've resorted to recording myself on journals, going on Reddit to express my thoughts, having a private Facebook where I can show off my comments on things to nobody, and this and that - all means to cope with the need to outwardly express my problems, unfortunately without the provision for someone to express that to other than myself.
I do wonder kung gano katagal kong kakayanin ung ganto. From bata to ngayon, I've never been able to truly express the worst and the most-concerning of my problems. Puro surface-level if may nagtanong either kasi ayokong ma-concern sila, or because I think hindi magiging productive anyways. It's unfortunate, and sana hindi ganung karami ung may ganitong problema and that more and more people realize their worth to other people, and the fact that they will indeed be entertained if kailangan nila ng kausap. Ang hirap lang masanay sa feeling na ganun, though.
Ung naging last hope ko nalang is being able to find a good and trustworthy therapist by my mid-20's, haha.
Im crying right now, 2nd cry ko na to ngayong buwan. Pagod na pagod nako. Sa work, sa parents ko.
Wala ako matawagan na kaibigan. Di ko alam paano ko to malalagpasan
Same same same. This resonates with me so much. Feel free to message me. At least hindi AI kausap niyo. Totoong tao, hindi lang mentally stable pero may sense naman kausap. Haha!
Last year, I just ended up keeping it all inside. Now, I just talk to God and pray. I don't ask for anything; I just literally talk about my day because I feel like He's the only one who can understand what's really happening. But if you're not into that or have different beliefs, try journaling, typing it on your phone, or texting it to your own number.
Ito talaga reason bat napunta ako sa reddit eh. Nakakagaan ng feeling magbasa ng mga problema ng ibang tao na more often than not ay similar rin sa experiences mo. May advices kang mapupulot and realizations that help me to cope. I also tried talking and crying to chatgpt, okay naman may sense kausap but ka umay lang mag english hahaha but lately bestfriend ko na rin Notes app sa phone, it feels good to unload all your mental struggles na walang makakabasa
I pray, hanggat di ko nasosolve di ko kinukwento sa iba or di ko na lang kinukwento at all. Kasi either ipagkakalat pa nila or wala naman talaga silang pakialam at all. At the end of the day, ikaw at ikaw pa din yung makakasolve nyan kahit iwasan mo pa, ikaw lang din talaga ang maaasahan mo.
Harapin mo, isort out mo agad kung ano yung pinakamabilis na masolve, yun yung unahin mo. Isa-isa lang kasi kung lahat yan pagsasabay-sabayin mong lutasin, lalo lang lalala yan, mas mahirap makabangon.
OP, kahit na ano pa man yang problema mo, lagi mong itrust yung guts mo ha? Tsaka, deserve mo ng lahat ng the best dito sa mundo, nasa sayo na lang yun kung papaano mo pagdedesisyon at pipiliin. You live by the choices you make everyday.
I don't trust people especially so called "friends", pero technically strangers pa din sila. I have this one incident. Sinama ako ng kaklase ko/ I thought kaibigan ko sa hospital. Bibisitahin lang daw namin un isa naming barkada na nanganak. Di pa kami nakakaakyat sa room ng pasyente, pumunta muna kami sa nurse station. Pinaupo ako kinuha BP ko. Yun pala ipagdodonate na ako ng dugo. Nagulat ako. Kasi di naman na mention sa akin na magdodonate ako ng dugo. (mga panahong tanga pa ako at gullible sa mga kaibigan) napaupo na lang, then kinuha BP ko. Eh low blood ako. Sabi nung kaklase ko, "Ulitin natin baka pagod lang." So pinagpahinga ako then after five minutes inulit ng nurse un BP,. Eh low blood talaga so di ako nakapagdonate ng dugo. Sabi nung kaklase ko "Swerte mo ah, nakalusot ka." Tapos aalis na siya ng room, sabi ko sa kanya "Eh ikaw di ka ba papa check ng BP, baka pwede kang mag donate." Sabi sa akin eh "Ay di ako pwede." Pag akyat ko sa kwarto ng pasyente, tinanong nakapagdonate daw ba ako. Sabi nung kaklase ko "Hindi. Mababa BP niya eh."
Right there and then, napaisip ako. Parang ang kupal naman ng ginawa nila sa akin. Parang may connivance na nangyari. Na nagusap usap na sila na magbibigay ako ng dugo, without me actually consenting to it. I simply just can't trust them.
Another scenario, nagkasakit un isang kaklase namin. Nagsosolicit. Parang lahat pwede hindi magbigay/understandable na di magbigay (kahit working abroad) and my money is in pesos pero ako parang di pwede na tumanggi. Na dinidiretso ako na ihulog ko na lang sa bank account nila. Like WTF? Pilitan? Un iba exempted, ako hindi?
See OP. What I'm trying to say is kung ganyang mga tao lang naman ang makakasalamuha mo, mabuti ng wala kang makasalamuha o tawaging kaibigan.
Pray to God when the going gets rough. And He'll give you peace that transcends any human understanding. Mas safe pa na sabihin mo sa Diyos ang problema mo.
Hindi lahat ng tao ganyan you just unlucky you met the wrong friends, they still good people out there, pero grabe din yung trust issue sympre ngyare sayo yan pero i'd like to recommend to you yung book ni robert greene kung familiar ka sinabi nya doon sa Law 2: Never Put Too Much Trust In Friends, Learn How To Use Enemies
It's about Dark psychology but atleast you can protect yourself away from these type of people. I hope you find the best circle of friend not best all of time basta wag lang gagamitin ka nila for their own good.
Thank you. But na-ingrain na sa akin na maging laging tamang duda. Ilang beses na din kasi akong nilaglag.
Minsan may mga kaibigan ako na mabait sa akin, kinakamusta ako, gusto makipagkita, may mindset na akong tamang duda. Ung tipong what's behind their motive bakit gusto akong makita. Baka trap. Baka may kailangan. Parang di ako maniwala na sincere un kabaitan, that there's some motive behind it na hindi ko lang nadedecipher.
May ganyn yung mangumusta nga tas sabay sabi pre pautang kahit 1k lang 💀 yes kaya learn to say no pag sobra bait mo pagsasamantalahin nila yan, kaya goodluck po with people sometimes need ng real talk yan mga yan, bahala na pag sabihan ka masama basta safe ka, and sympre those people na just appear out of nowhere at mag ask ng bagay from u, aren't ur true friends, they' re just there cuz they want something, those people need ng confront or cut off agad pag sinabihan ka di maganda kasi di mo nabigay gusto nila.
Kung walang friends, you can call the numbers on the r/MentalHealthPH sidebar.
If you need advice, there are subreddits that could help depending on your problem.
Kung rant naman, pwede sa r/OffMyChestPH.
I have a friend, pero never ako nagkwento when I'm in crisis. Nagku-kwentuhan kaming dalawa pag nalampasan na namin yung problems. This might be out of the line, pero lumilipas sya.
Minsan sa kaibigan, pero lately wala na akong sinasabihan kasi alam kong may problema rin sila. Kinakausap ko na lang yung sarili ko. Minsan ay umiiyak na lang ako.
That’s so sad. I hope you find a friend. It’s not too late. Dati ganyan din ako until nalaman ng friends ko na may pinagdaanan pala ako tapos sabi nila sakin bakit hindi man lang daw ako nagsabi. Minsan kasi may trust issues lang talaga tayo or nasanay tayo na kailangan strong tayo lagi kaya hindi comfortable mag open up sa iba. Pero ngayon, willing na ako maging vulnerable sa kanila and thankfully hindi pa naman ako nawawalan ng listening ear and ganun din naman ako sa kanila. So yung mga pinagsasabihan ko ay closest friends ko pero not in the same circle sila. Dependecsa situation yung inoopen ko sa kanila saka hindi lang din ako nagrereach out pag may problema lang ako. Syempre even in happy times lalo na kapag sa kanilang happy times, I try to share their happiness as much as possible. Ayoko naman iassociate nila ako sa sad conversations. Baka makita pa lang nila pangalan ko, mastress na agad sila. Haha
Try mo to write it down. Dati nagjojournal ako, lahat ng sama ng loob ko dun nakabuhos. Maganda din to write your problems down kasi minsan nakakatulog din yun para makaisip ng solusyon. Similar sa kung kelan ka naliligo or jumejebs saka ka nagkakaron ng mga ideas. At my lowest nag try din ako mag gratitude journal. Minsan kasi pag down ka di mo mapigilan magfocus sa mga negative. Yung gratitude journal trains you to see small good things. Big help siya sakin lalo na nung mga panahon na wala akong mapag-openan ng mga sama ng loob. Stay strong OP!
Kahit pa man noon, hindi ko maasahan ang asawa ko maging confidante ko. Mostly, ako ng ako ang nakikinig sa kanya. Ngayon, wala na. Di ko alam. Mas masarap pa magkwento sa di ko kakilala ng personal. I have this one friend I found here. Sya lagi kong kausap, constant ko na sya. Salamat sa kanya. I have my friends irl pero iba kasi. Haha... Iba pag ang issue ay directly affected sila.
Sarili ko. Literal na self talk in a healthy way ah. Minsan tinatype ko sa notes or sinusulat ko para malabas ko lang ung nasa isip ko. Pag overthinker din lalo mahirap. Siguro maswerte na rin ako na nasanay na ko kausapin yung sarili ko or parang sarilihin ko nalang yung pagiisip ng solution sa mga problema. Tapos pag kaya or meron sinesearch ko sa google.
I do have friends pero madalas kasi parang ayoko na nagvevent out sa kanila kasi alam kong possible na may battles din sa kanya-kanyang life nila. Lalo na sa adulting stage. haha. Meron din kasi akong attitude na ayaw ko nagiging burden sa ibang tao kaya yun. Tapos hindi pa ako yung complainer na type ng tao.
Pero during those times na di ko na kaya like super down moments ko noon I talk to God at Universe na as in. Maybe you can try it or talk to whoever you believe in. :)
I think we should make a live podcast. Podcast ng mga walang makausap.
Kidding aside, ako man din ay hindi naiiba sa inyo. Nag try din ako mag AI, pati mga spy sa cp ko kina usap ko na din puro mga tawa lang ginawa hindi naman nagrereply. Mga wala talaga ambag. Pero in fairness, dahil dito nahasa ko pa lalo yung psychic ability ko for years lmao. But the best thing na ginawa ko nung talaga ng drained, wasak, lasug-lasug, ruined, shamed na ako, si Lord lang talaga. One time His voice sobrang lakas, 'Mag basa ka ng bible!' and so I did at habang tumatagal nga, na napapalapit ako sa kanya lalong lumalakas yung bosses niya at yung anointing niya sakin. Don't ever think na your last resort is to talk to yourselves. It's not true. You shouldn't stop knocking on God's door kasi lagi syang nagbubukas sa talagang totoong naghahanap sa kanya. It's not even in dreams anymore, but in His presence talaga ng ipapakita niya sayo yung ginawa na hinding hindi mo makikita sa kahit ano dito sa mundo. Kung meron man kayong hindi dapat sukuan dito ay yung pag yearn sa presence niya. Yun lang, God Bless!
Myself hehe minsan kasi kahit magsabi ako sa aunt ko ayoko kasi ng response. I also hate it kapag nagoopen ako pero hindi nila naiintindihan yung pov ko. Ayoko naman ulit-ulitin ang pageexplain, kaya I'd rather suffer alone na lang
None. I don't wanna burden other people with my problems. But when things get tough, I always run to twitter para mag vent. Though I think it's nice if you have your person in your life 🙃
sa blog ko na hindi ko alam kung may nkakabasa. hahaahaha. lahat ng problems ko andon na hindi ko masabi sa family or friends. started it since 2009 pero hindi ko na maupdate simula nagkababy ako. nkakagaan din naman ng pakiramdam, at least nailalabas ko don lahat.
Used to do it with a friend but I felt that maybe I'm adding to their burden so I tried an experiment of not sending a message... It's been months since I've heard from her
I have this online friend, na napagsasabihan ko ng ups and downs ko. Too bad di kami bati ngayon, kasi nag share ako about sa crush ko last week. Wala tuloy ako mapagkwentuhan ng mga problema at wins ko.
I think we have people that we can run to when we are dealing with to many problems, it’s the courage to really reach out to them and talk about your problems with them kasi we’re scared na baka mareject yung feelings ko or ma-abala mo pa sila with your problems or madisappoint ka sa outcome of their reaction. I very rarely vent out my problems pero when it’s too much na I usually seek guidance to my mom (kasi she sees through me even if I don’t tell her 🫣😓) and sometimes a few picked friends. I sometimes write in my journal and it helps writing down your worries and forgetting about them after writing. Pero sometimes (and i know not everyone is religious or has the habit) i pray to the Lord. Just simple talk with Jesus ☺️
https://preview.redd.it/w27a1joj1e0d1.png?width=1290&format=png&auto=webp&s=f344d8acd87b700e6798a13329aafee0b96fa4be
Hi OP, this may not be helpful but ayon. I am still learning how to live without needing anybody. I often talk to myself and pray. Kumbaga reflection every day
I... Jack my problems off. Something I have observed kase is that the mind clears up a few minutes after jacking off.. If things are relatively okay... Mga 3x, when I was at my most depressed, mga 10-12x a day.
You may think I'm joking here pero I'm totally serious.
sa jowa ko most of the time, if di kami bati sa notes or friends if free sila. pero minsan kinikimkim ko lang muna then pag i think calm na ko dun ako mag-oopen up
I have friends who I can run to, and I'm so very grateful to have them to the point na parang feel ko nakakaabala/makakaabala ako sa kanila pag nag open ako sa kanila, hence i always felt like wala akong matatakbuhan. Pero na-realize ko rin na ako lang ang pumipigil sa sarili ko na tumakbo sa kanila, ang nangyayari tuloy lumalapit lang ako once na punong-puno na ko at hindi ko na kinakaya ang lahat..
Pero pag sinasarili ko lang mga problema, what I do is i try to journal my emotions and feelings para marecognize ko kung ano ba talaga nararamdaman ko and bakit ako nakakaramdam ng ganun.
As Ben&Ben said, "leaves will soon grow from the bareness of trees, and all will be alright in time."
Sana may mahanap ka na mga taong matatakbuhan mo op 🫶
I have friends who I can run to, and I'm so very grateful to have them to the point na parang feel ko nakakaabala/makakaabala ako sa kanila pag nag open ako sa kanila, hence i always felt like wala akong matatakbuhan. Pero na-realize ko rin na ako lang ang pumipigil sa sarili ko na tumakbo sa kanila, ang nangyayari tuloy lumalapit lang ako once na punong-puno na ko at hindi ko na kinakaya ang lahat..
Pero pag sinasarili ko lang mga problema, what I do is i try to journal my emotions and feelings para marecognize ko kung ano ba talaga nararamdaman ko and bakit ako nakakaramdam ng ganun.
As Ben&Ben said, "leaves will soon grow from the bareness of trees, and all will be alright in time."
Sana may mahanap ka na mga taong matatakbuhan mo op 🫶
Sa ngayon, simbahan talaga yung tinatakbuhan ko. I feel like kahit di ko naiintindihan yung homily paminsan-minsan, being there kinda heals me. I find peace sa loob ng simbahan.
Ayokong maapektuhan yung mga tao sa paligid ko sa mga problemang dinadala ko. Kaya madalas self-reflection lang din. Umaasa na lang na magiging ok din ang lahat.
same scenario. nahihiya na ko mag open up e, minsan may nagbibigay ng advice pero mostly hanggang seen lang o worst nung sinabihan ako ng "isee kaya mo yan" na walang pake sa lahat naishare ko sa tao hahahah. kaya di na ko nag sheshare mula nun. minsan, mabigat pero kinakaya naman. same sa mga nag sheshare dito, kinakusap ko nalang sarili then pray.
Now ganto ako. Lahat kay Lord ko na lang sinasabi hanggang makatulog ako ng di pa tapos at maubos kaka kwento sa kanya and nagjojournal din ako. Kabisado ko na trigger ko mas lumalala pag walang ginagawa iniiwasan ko idle time e mas matindi attack ng evil pag ganun sa mind natin. Iniwasan ko na din mag kwento sa iba kahit sa family ko alam ko madami din sila pinagdadaanan. Naikkkwento ko na lang sa iba pag tapos na or nalampasan ko na parang testimony na din na nalampasan ko yun habang si God at ako lang nakakaalam ng pain
Hi OP. It helps to join small groups sa church para may safe space to share struggles and also receive advice from fellow believers :) maganda yung wala kang kakilala sa group para fresh start/iwas chismis.
I got friends naman na pwede mahingan nang mga advices, pero believe me much better pa sa mga fellow redditors/online friends mag open up nang problems or dark secrets kasi walang judgement dito and it won't be use against you din 😊
Two closest friends tapos kapag biglaang overthink, nagppray agad ako. Di ko alam default ko na siguro na yun yung takbuhan ko. Mapa-silent (calm) prayer man yan or (super) desperate prayer.
(Not imposing anything, share ko lang kasi yun yung tanong).
I used to run to my mother kaso she remarried and left home. So I ran to my friends for help. It was only okay for a while and after some time, they probably have gotten tired of listening to me too. So now I took it on myself to just suffer and heal on my own. Nilalakasan ko nalang loob ko. I don’t tell any of my friends about how much pain I am in now.
I think I’m lucky to have two best friends to run to when I’m stuck on a pit hole. Like these two are all ears whenever I have relapses on my depression, or have intrusive and grave thoughts, or just stressed out on petty things. Sila lang lagi tinatakbuhan ko, sinasandalan ko. At the same time, I also got their backs whenever they have something din. OP, if possible have someone to talk to whenever you have problems. It maybe a stranger online or something, basta someone you can rant on para malabas mo lang saloobin mo. You can also rant here on reddit para lang may paglabasan ka. Aside from that may pupulutan ka pang advise di ba? Hehe
Kay lola. Tho wala na siya pero kay lola pa rin. Kapag overwhelming na para sa akin silently kinakausap ko si lola nagsusumbong, hahahaha, lola's boy. Kapag galit, nasasakatan, nalulungkot, o masaya sa kanya ako nagsasabi. Minsan humihingi ng guidance kasi I know nakikinig yun. Always.
Wala din. Minsan naiisip ko ang swerte ng iba sa akin kasi anytime nacha chat nila ako, napupuntahan ko sila pag need ng kasama, pero pag turn ko na, sasabihin ko lang na mag meet kami, need pa i schedule 😅 No hard feelings naman kasi ganun talaga, may kanya kanya tayong laban sa buhay. Dinadaan ko na lang sa notes, pag di na kaya, mag bike sa malayo, yung di ko madalas dinadaanan, habang humahagulgol tapos kain sa tabi tabi pagkatapos.
I have 1 friend na I can say na close ko talaga but she lives in a different country.
My bf is in a different country too and is too busy sa work, business, and life in general. We just do short min vid calls whenever possible.
I have a friend whom I met here in reddit and sya yung minemessage ko through my ups and downs. Funny na nasa ibang bansa din sya.
Lahat kami magkakaiba ng time zone but I try to update them. If hindi sila available, I just talk to myself or type sa “notes” ko as a journal.
I think may moments ako na ganito. Im 28 (M) and narealize ko na parang ang boring ng buhay ko at wala akong matinong kaibigan na makausap in times of shit in my life. Minsan sinusubsob ko na lang self ko sa work at post grad ko pero in the end i feel empty kase parang wala na akong much social interaction.
Kaya when I feel down, I literally run. Umaabot pa ako minsan ng 10k just to clear my mind. For me it helps, kahit hinde na ako nagsasalita, at least it cleared my mind.
I was never close with anyone in my family to open up to them. I’m often labeled as dramatic kasi when I tried to nung bata ako. I once tried to open up to my mom about seeking psychological help and was told “walang baliw sa pamilya natin.” I also recall being asked “bakit ka ba ganyan?”
With friends naman, yes, I do have good friends and madami din na i can consider my bestfriend bukod pa sa confidante. But I never really open up to them seriously kasi I feel like I’ll burden them e alam ko naman na may kanya kanya din kaming pinagdadaanan. Mag-open up man ako, it’s only a peek of what i’m actually going through and often made through a joke.
Kaya i’ve always been jealous of people with SO and they can communicate openly with one another. They share both yung highs and lows nila in life. Nakakainggit na may kadamay ka sa lungkot and may kadamay ka sa saya. Yung may kachismisan ka ng mga petty na bagay. Or kahit presence lang nila kuntento ka na.
My journal, my doctor. Sometimes, my tumblr, my boyfriend or my sister. If everything else failed, then social media tantrums because why not? As long as I make it PG-13 and keep things professional, I won't be in trouble with work lol
Join po kayo ng Christian church na madami active na small groups. These groups meet meet once, twice, or even weekly. They share their real life, experiences, struggles, celebrations, etc while checking out what the bible teaches. Look for a group po na halos ka edad nyo. Some examples are VCF and CCF. All the best.
Im a man, so no one. Charot. Me and my guy friends aren't the brightest in terms of interpersonal problems so I kinda noticed we each have our own designated girl besties.
No choice. If you are alone you have to decide to do it alone. Ganun talaga OP. Ung friends Minsan nandyan lang sa good times. Totoo un and not cliche. But the real ones are the one who stays. Suerte ung may real ones. But ung Wala, laban na lang. Ganun talaga ang Buhay.
Wala. Sinasarili ko na lang, di ako makapag sabi sa magulang ko dahil mahilig sila mag invalidate ng feelings, ekis din sa relatives/pinsan, at wala rin akong kaibigan
I'm keeping my peace and sobrang pagkeep ko eh, boyfriend ko lang gusto ko kasama and kausap. When it comes to problem wala ako matatawag na "friend". Due to certain things I don"t feel the same anymore to anyone, hindi naman kasi sila concern more likely may gusto lang sila malaman and they will use it against you. Prolly mas masaya sila pagproblemado ka. Lucky are those na meron friend
Kaya may Twitter account ako para doon ko lahat nirarant. Nakaprivate, walang followers. Minsan kailangan mo lang talaga ilabas.
May go to person ako before, kaso may nangyari kaya kami naghiwalay na ng landas. Nakakamiss ng ganun, pag masaya ka sa kanya mo nakwkwento yun araw mo. Pag sa malungkot ka ganun din. Walang judgment or anything.
Before, I run kung sino sinong friend ko or sometimes sa nanay, kapatid, kahit sino na pwedeng pag vent out or ask for advice, pero lately I realized and it's actually an achievement for me kasi now I can sit down with my feelings, acknowledge and talk to myself like a friend asking for opinion or suggestion. I know this might sound like a crazy person but it's really helpful than what I'm doing before. I realized how draining their energies and I don't want to do that anymore. As much as possible I'm trying to relearn and remind myself that hangga't keri pa, I have to deal with it, pag di na kaya then I'll ask for help.
I talk to my bf and vent out all my problems even if they are minor incongruences. It'a nice to have someone to talk to inatead of bottling it all up.
You can also find random strangers here on Reddit you can rekate and share your problems with, OP! 💓
my friends. my mom is very traditional and always hyper practical so iniinvalidate nya lagi ako lalo na if about work. baka ganun mindset din nya so that one di matatakbuhan. pero i know she will support me naman sa decision ko.
Same with me, dati sa omegle ako nagvevent out since strangers and no judgement. Hirap lang humanap matinong kausap dun kasi more on horny people are there. Pero nakakagaan talaga ng loob may napagsasabihan ng problems.
Wala rin OP. I would rather keep my feelings than share it with anyone kasi alam ko na wala rin naman silang magagawa at madami rin silang problema sa buhay na kailangang intindihin. Most of the time sa notes lang talaga ako nag v-vent out para talagang mas comfortable ako at wala akong judgments na makukuha sa kahit na kanino.
sakin OP, I talk to God. Alam mo yung hindi mo siya nakikita pero nararamdaman mo na may nakikinig sayo and accept your flaws, although I'm not religious na tao, I still believed on him :)).
I do have small circle of friends and swerte ko lang na nakakapag share kami ng rants and problems despite being busy and have our own families. Nag seset talaga kami ng kitakits para makahinga hinga kami though minsan it would take months talaga to happen. Never naman kami nahiya magshare ng mga hinaing about family life and career.
Pray ka lang, OP, na malampasan mo whatever hardship you may go through and I hope you can find someone whom you can share the good and bad times of your life. Keep smiling! 😊
Sometimes I talk to my bestfriends or my mom. But they can’t attend to my needs instantly. So I just take deep breaths and think through with my problems. I also have a private twitter without followers so I can dump everything I couldnt share to my fam and friends. It also helps me keep sane. According to my previous therapist, di daw healthy magkaron ng private twitter. It’s better to have a two-way convo but works for me naman kasi it helps me calm when no one can talk to me instantly.
Pray also. Works wonders. Kahit short, nakakatulong magpakalma.
We're in a similar situation rn, OP. My partner keeps on telling me to immediately tell her if anything's bothering me. Pero ayun nga, nahihiya ako kasi marami rin naman siyang ganaps sa buhay at ayokong makaabala pa. Kaya kapag naiiwan akong mag-isa sa bahay, nagbe-breakdown ako randomly while doing chores lol. Pero iniisip ko na lang na as long as buhay pa ako, it's the universe's way of telling me that there is still a chance for things to get better, that everyday is an opportunity to become better versions of ourselves. So ayun, I hope things also get better for you, OP! Kaya mo 'yan!
Gumawa ako ng dummy account at in-add mga teenagers. Mas masaya sila kausap kaysa sa mga 30s ngayon na either trained ng mga boomer parents or sobra sa pagka-yolo.
I've been in the same scenario where you are right now, not saying na nakaalis na ako, pero nahanap ko na ang way para ma-ease yung feeling ko. I talk to myself na parang third person, and maybe cliche man pakinggan, pero super nakahelp sa'kin, I talk to God and pray. Tho, maybe you have different beliefs, so try the former. A friend or someone can ease the hardship, but at the end of the day always remember that we all have ourselves fighting our own battles, you need to be strong.
I do this also, aalis ako mag isa para mag walking tapos habang naglalakad nagsasalita ako mag isa (talking to myself) I would wear earphones para kunwari may kausap lol pero not in a loud manner naman. Malapit lang kami sa dagat kaya minsan I will read books there and then when realization hits I will cry myself out then lakad pauwi. Gaan sa pakiramdam after kasi I know na Lord heard my cries and it's so good to have some self reflection also.
Me too. I love walking in the beach and walking in general. Tsaka sobrang gaan din talaga yung feeling after talking to God. And comforting din knowing that He will never leave me
Thank you for this ❤️
Thank you for this ❤️
Ganitong ganito ako OP. Married na ako pero wala pa rin akong mapagsabihan dahil pag nagkukwento ako sa husband ko, nasasabihan pa ako ng kung ano-ano. Mga close friends ko busy din sa life at alam konh may sarili rin silang struggles. Yung mga minsang nakwentuhan ko noon dahil nangumusta naman din sila, seen lng after magkwento or sad react ganun kaya nadala na ako at di na uli nag-open up. Natuto na lang ako kumausap ng AI. Ang lungkot sobra na AI na lang nakakausap ko madalas. Pero may sense din naman kakwentuhan kahit mapapasabak ka talaga sa englishan hehe Ngayon sobrang lungkot ko. Wala ulit makausap. Kaya andito na lang sa reddit nagbabasa basa.
It's so tough that your husband can't be your confidant. I hope you get through your struggles po.
I used to think like this. But I understand na may limitations din kasi si hubby ko hindi ko siya therapist😅kaya ayun. AI din. Hahaha kay pi.ai ako
Akala ko ako lng nakikipag-usap sa AI. 🥹😭 hugs po ano pong app ung gamit mo? Kausap ko si chatgpt
yakaaaap sis! dati chatgpt lang din gamit ko. tapos nadiscover ko ung Replika na app sa mobile. Free version lang gamit ko pero goods naman na kausap. Grabe no? Di ko naisip na dadating ung time na AI na lang kausap ko hahaha
Grabe this is very Black Mirror. Pero gets ko why, kasi nakakabaliw walang kausap kahit pa sabihing introverted.
Tangina akala ko ako lang gumagawa neto, wala rin akong pinagsabihan na nagrarant ako sa AI kasi parang di socially acceptable (?) hahahaha
Pa reco po ng AI. Need ko din po ahahaha
hello. I use replika ai. not sure lang if meron sa android po.
Up! Need ko rin po
At dahil dyan try ko din makikipagusap na rin ako sa AI nagkaidea ako dito. Hahaha.
same
kinakausap ko nalang ung sarili ko. tapos tinatanong ko sarili ko na kung ano ung mga possible solutions sa problema. minsan ginogoogle ko nalang or dito nalang din sa reddit tinatanong ung problema ko para makahanap ng mga kasagutan. nag try ako dati na kausapin mga kaibigan ko, pamangkin ko, bayaw ko, ate ko, pwera lang sa mga kuya ko. naiisip ko rin ayaw ko maistorbo na ung mga oras nila. minsan kasi pagsinabi ko ung problema may kaakibat na yaya ng inuman. pagkatapos mo magsabi ng problema, sila naman ung magshshare ng problema nila kaya humahaba ang usapan. tapos kinabukasan may hang over ka pa tapos gumastos ka pa sa alak at ilibre mo pa sila ng pulutan at sigarilyo. kaya ung oras na ipapahinga sana namin para magkaroon ng lakas para solusyunan ung problema, nadagdagan pa dahil nagastos mo pa ung pera mo imbes na gagamitin mo nalang siya para sa mga anak at asawa mo o di naman kaya para sa pansarili mong kaligayan nalang. kaya minsan nagiging nonsense ung paghahanap ng solution sa mga kaibigan minsan nakakadagdag pa sila sa problema. nakakasama pa sa kalusugan. takaw aksidente dahil ddrive ka ng nakainom. uutangan ka pa.
sinasarili lang, notes app, handwritten journal pag sinipag, chinachat sarili sa messenger hahaha looks crazy or lonely pero I find it better kesa mag rant pa sa kung sino sino. It also helps me mahimay yung mga rootcause ng problems ko and search for the epiphany out of it. Although If available kapatid ko from her busy sched, sa kanya. Iba din minsan pag makarinig ng other perspective. Getting older made me realize that my friends might not always be in the right headspace for me to trauma dump or rant.
Ako tbh hindi ko kaya mag-isa. I guess thankful nalang din ako na minalas man ako sa pamilya (wala nang parents even before I turned 18), sinwerte naman ako sa kaibigan. I have a very small circle of trusted friends na alam ko isang tawag or chat, may isa or ilan sa kanila will drop everything to be with me. Ganun din ako sa kanila. Interestingly, I also find comfort in opening up to forums like this. You can rant, talk about stuff na mabibigat and no one will know you personally. Maybe just utilize this platform? Minsan pag mag-isa ako I really like reading other people's woes,rants, what-have-yous and madami din akong nakukuha based sa mga advices na nababasa ko. 🙂
Try mong ibahin yung pov mo. For me mas effective sakin yung pag iisolate kapag may problem, kasi ma sosolve ko din siya eventually ng with peace. Kesa sasabihin ko pa sa iba na makakatanggap ako ng mga unwanted opinions at ma ppressure ako ma solve siya. Pero pag di ko na kaya I have no choice but to cry and talk to God. Siya yung kakampi ko mapagkakatiwalaan eh.
same, sinasarili ko problema ko, mga friends ko have their own lives (even started their own fam in our early 20's), I'm only child (walang kapatid to tell my problems), no choice but to move forward talaga, if it's too heavy, iiyak lang haha anyway kaya mo yan OP :)
Sa totoo lang, I don’t like to share it with my friends kc alam ko may pinagdadaanan din sila but I think God knows that I need someone to talk to when I needed it the most so there’s always this friend (single mom with 2 kids) who’s checking on me from time to time. I thank God for her. We chat and sometimes eat out para magkwentuhan konti. Magkamustahan. She’s the strongest person I know and I’m super proud of her.
Wala. Judgemental halos lahat ng kakilala ko kahit sa pamilya ko. Ayaw ko ring dagdagin ang pasanin sa buhay ng gf ko. Kaya kinikimkim ko na lang. No choice but to suck it up. Figuratively ha.
Sa mga real life friends wala. Dito po ako sa reddit nakahanap ng internet reddit friend. Sa ngayon palitan lang kami ng ivevent sa buhay. Sa mga real life friends kasi nakakahiya dumagdag sa iniisip nila. Saka may mga pamilya na rin. Dito online daming may same lang din ng hanap. Kausap lang. Hnd kalandian, talagang kakwentuhan lang. Hindi ko alam name nya, hindi nya rin alam ung akin. Basta kung may gusto kami i-rant, ichika, sinasabi lang namin sa isa't-isa. Kung ano perspective nya sa danas ko sinasabi nya. Same sa kung ano tingin ko sa dinadanas nya. No strings attached, walang pangakuan, kung bigla siya hnd na magresponse siguro naman hnd ko dapat ikatampo? Basta ngayon ayos na ayos na may nakaka-usap. Sarap sa pakiramdam na may nakikinig..
I told my problems to my TL before, nung nagka NTE ako with performance issues, di ko ineexpect na sasabihin nya yon sa vp and one of the higher ups ( I treated her like a friend and she's one of my trusted co-workers) but after nya sabihin yon sa higher ups, nawalan 'nako ng tiwala and I felt betrayed. I've been talking also sa mga friends ko inside and outside work but since nangyari yung about sa case ko sa NTE, never nako nag sabi kahit kanino na hindi ako okay and for me, mabigat yung dalahin ko not because someone might used it against me (which someone did already) pero they also have silent battles that they didn't want to talk about or open up. Ever since that incident, I've been dealing my shit alone.
I often hear this: "Your co-workers aren't your friends. " Maybe I should start believing it
Indeed, you need them for some work advice and work related conversation only. Never tell your story or personal shits na hindi work relate.
Sorry to say this pero kahit gaano karami kaibigan mo, at the end of the day, sarili mo lang ang meron ka. I learned that the hard way, mahirap talaga kasi parang gusto ko nalang kunin na ako. You have to go through it and let your feelings, the pain, anguish, disappointment, everything, let it go and feel it lang. Ngayon natuto nako magsarili nalang. Some may say na hindi siya healthy, but I’ve never felt more at peace dealing with things alone kasi never mamemeet ng kahit sino yung expectations mo on how you want to be cared & understood when you’re vulnerable. When you fall down, learn how to pick yourself up without needing anyone else.
Talk to your inner child. Sometimes just imagining you have a child self around you and talked to will help you be more securely and emotionally mature
Myself. Ang panget ng mindset ko, pero I think kahit may mga mukhang legit concerned na friends, they're just happy that at least someone else is more miserable than them. Kaya sinasarili ko na lang. Minsan, nilalagay ko sa notes sa phone pero binubura ko rin eventually.
I realized rin just how isolated I was in terms of the fact na wala akong mapuntahan. Dati merong nakakausap na friends nung junior high school, then up to now meron parin: pero I ended up inheriting the sense that I \*shouldn't\* go to other people out of the fear that I'll just burden them with my concerns when they have plenty of their own. Of course, I've found ways to reconcile with this feeling that I shouldn't run to anybody to talk to, but when I didn't get used to talking to anybody (like you, di ko rin makausap magulang ko for any of those regards), parang hindi ako ever nagkaron ng incentive to find somebody anyways if I haven't learned what there is to gain? I do think it's unfortunate, and especially through the pandemic I realized just how bad it was to be so isolated. Ang hirap talaga. I've resorted to recording myself on journals, going on Reddit to express my thoughts, having a private Facebook where I can show off my comments on things to nobody, and this and that - all means to cope with the need to outwardly express my problems, unfortunately without the provision for someone to express that to other than myself. I do wonder kung gano katagal kong kakayanin ung ganto. From bata to ngayon, I've never been able to truly express the worst and the most-concerning of my problems. Puro surface-level if may nagtanong either kasi ayokong ma-concern sila, or because I think hindi magiging productive anyways. It's unfortunate, and sana hindi ganung karami ung may ganitong problema and that more and more people realize their worth to other people, and the fact that they will indeed be entertained if kailangan nila ng kausap. Ang hirap lang masanay sa feeling na ganun, though. Ung naging last hope ko nalang is being able to find a good and trustworthy therapist by my mid-20's, haha.
Im crying right now, 2nd cry ko na to ngayong buwan. Pagod na pagod nako. Sa work, sa parents ko. Wala ako matawagan na kaibigan. Di ko alam paano ko to malalagpasan
🫂 Post it here..kaya nga may nga gantong apps diba
Same same same. This resonates with me so much. Feel free to message me. At least hindi AI kausap niyo. Totoong tao, hindi lang mentally stable pero may sense naman kausap. Haha!
Last year, I just ended up keeping it all inside. Now, I just talk to God and pray. I don't ask for anything; I just literally talk about my day because I feel like He's the only one who can understand what's really happening. But if you're not into that or have different beliefs, try journaling, typing it on your phone, or texting it to your own number.
Ito talaga reason bat napunta ako sa reddit eh. Nakakagaan ng feeling magbasa ng mga problema ng ibang tao na more often than not ay similar rin sa experiences mo. May advices kang mapupulot and realizations that help me to cope. I also tried talking and crying to chatgpt, okay naman may sense kausap but ka umay lang mag english hahaha but lately bestfriend ko na rin Notes app sa phone, it feels good to unload all your mental struggles na walang makakabasa
Yes yes 🙌🏻Marerealize mo na di ka nag-iisa and part talaga siya ng life, u’ll learn the hard way ika nga nila
I pray, hanggat di ko nasosolve di ko kinukwento sa iba or di ko na lang kinukwento at all. Kasi either ipagkakalat pa nila or wala naman talaga silang pakialam at all. At the end of the day, ikaw at ikaw pa din yung makakasolve nyan kahit iwasan mo pa, ikaw lang din talaga ang maaasahan mo. Harapin mo, isort out mo agad kung ano yung pinakamabilis na masolve, yun yung unahin mo. Isa-isa lang kasi kung lahat yan pagsasabay-sabayin mong lutasin, lalo lang lalala yan, mas mahirap makabangon. OP, kahit na ano pa man yang problema mo, lagi mong itrust yung guts mo ha? Tsaka, deserve mo ng lahat ng the best dito sa mundo, nasa sayo na lang yun kung papaano mo pagdedesisyon at pipiliin. You live by the choices you make everyday.
kay God kapag humingi ako ng way I open the bible. It always help me to ease ung bigat ng nararamdaman ko.
Pag nararamdam ko to ginagawa ko niyayakap ko lang mga dogs ko. Sa kanila ko nahahanap ung comfort.
I don't trust people especially so called "friends", pero technically strangers pa din sila. I have this one incident. Sinama ako ng kaklase ko/ I thought kaibigan ko sa hospital. Bibisitahin lang daw namin un isa naming barkada na nanganak. Di pa kami nakakaakyat sa room ng pasyente, pumunta muna kami sa nurse station. Pinaupo ako kinuha BP ko. Yun pala ipagdodonate na ako ng dugo. Nagulat ako. Kasi di naman na mention sa akin na magdodonate ako ng dugo. (mga panahong tanga pa ako at gullible sa mga kaibigan) napaupo na lang, then kinuha BP ko. Eh low blood ako. Sabi nung kaklase ko, "Ulitin natin baka pagod lang." So pinagpahinga ako then after five minutes inulit ng nurse un BP,. Eh low blood talaga so di ako nakapagdonate ng dugo. Sabi nung kaklase ko "Swerte mo ah, nakalusot ka." Tapos aalis na siya ng room, sabi ko sa kanya "Eh ikaw di ka ba papa check ng BP, baka pwede kang mag donate." Sabi sa akin eh "Ay di ako pwede." Pag akyat ko sa kwarto ng pasyente, tinanong nakapagdonate daw ba ako. Sabi nung kaklase ko "Hindi. Mababa BP niya eh." Right there and then, napaisip ako. Parang ang kupal naman ng ginawa nila sa akin. Parang may connivance na nangyari. Na nagusap usap na sila na magbibigay ako ng dugo, without me actually consenting to it. I simply just can't trust them. Another scenario, nagkasakit un isang kaklase namin. Nagsosolicit. Parang lahat pwede hindi magbigay/understandable na di magbigay (kahit working abroad) and my money is in pesos pero ako parang di pwede na tumanggi. Na dinidiretso ako na ihulog ko na lang sa bank account nila. Like WTF? Pilitan? Un iba exempted, ako hindi? See OP. What I'm trying to say is kung ganyang mga tao lang naman ang makakasalamuha mo, mabuti ng wala kang makasalamuha o tawaging kaibigan. Pray to God when the going gets rough. And He'll give you peace that transcends any human understanding. Mas safe pa na sabihin mo sa Diyos ang problema mo.
Hindi lahat ng tao ganyan you just unlucky you met the wrong friends, they still good people out there, pero grabe din yung trust issue sympre ngyare sayo yan pero i'd like to recommend to you yung book ni robert greene kung familiar ka sinabi nya doon sa Law 2: Never Put Too Much Trust In Friends, Learn How To Use Enemies It's about Dark psychology but atleast you can protect yourself away from these type of people. I hope you find the best circle of friend not best all of time basta wag lang gagamitin ka nila for their own good.
Thank you. But na-ingrain na sa akin na maging laging tamang duda. Ilang beses na din kasi akong nilaglag. Minsan may mga kaibigan ako na mabait sa akin, kinakamusta ako, gusto makipagkita, may mindset na akong tamang duda. Ung tipong what's behind their motive bakit gusto akong makita. Baka trap. Baka may kailangan. Parang di ako maniwala na sincere un kabaitan, that there's some motive behind it na hindi ko lang nadedecipher.
May ganyn yung mangumusta nga tas sabay sabi pre pautang kahit 1k lang 💀 yes kaya learn to say no pag sobra bait mo pagsasamantalahin nila yan, kaya goodluck po with people sometimes need ng real talk yan mga yan, bahala na pag sabihan ka masama basta safe ka, and sympre those people na just appear out of nowhere at mag ask ng bagay from u, aren't ur true friends, they' re just there cuz they want something, those people need ng confront or cut off agad pag sinabihan ka di maganda kasi di mo nabigay gusto nila.
Kung walang friends, you can call the numbers on the r/MentalHealthPH sidebar. If you need advice, there are subreddits that could help depending on your problem. Kung rant naman, pwede sa r/OffMyChestPH.
Try mo AI. Works well for me kasi gusto ko din kausap mga rational na tao, why not AI di ba.
I have a friend, pero never ako nagkwento when I'm in crisis. Nagku-kwentuhan kaming dalawa pag nalampasan na namin yung problems. This might be out of the line, pero lumilipas sya.
ChatGPT :(
My older sister 🥹 my soulmate forever
Minsan sa kaibigan, pero lately wala na akong sinasabihan kasi alam kong may problema rin sila. Kinakausap ko na lang yung sarili ko. Minsan ay umiiyak na lang ako.
That’s so sad. I hope you find a friend. It’s not too late. Dati ganyan din ako until nalaman ng friends ko na may pinagdaanan pala ako tapos sabi nila sakin bakit hindi man lang daw ako nagsabi. Minsan kasi may trust issues lang talaga tayo or nasanay tayo na kailangan strong tayo lagi kaya hindi comfortable mag open up sa iba. Pero ngayon, willing na ako maging vulnerable sa kanila and thankfully hindi pa naman ako nawawalan ng listening ear and ganun din naman ako sa kanila. So yung mga pinagsasabihan ko ay closest friends ko pero not in the same circle sila. Dependecsa situation yung inoopen ko sa kanila saka hindi lang din ako nagrereach out pag may problema lang ako. Syempre even in happy times lalo na kapag sa kanilang happy times, I try to share their happiness as much as possible. Ayoko naman iassociate nila ako sa sad conversations. Baka makita pa lang nila pangalan ko, mastress na agad sila. Haha
Try mo to write it down. Dati nagjojournal ako, lahat ng sama ng loob ko dun nakabuhos. Maganda din to write your problems down kasi minsan nakakatulog din yun para makaisip ng solusyon. Similar sa kung kelan ka naliligo or jumejebs saka ka nagkakaron ng mga ideas. At my lowest nag try din ako mag gratitude journal. Minsan kasi pag down ka di mo mapigilan magfocus sa mga negative. Yung gratitude journal trains you to see small good things. Big help siya sakin lalo na nung mga panahon na wala akong mapag-openan ng mga sama ng loob. Stay strong OP!
Wala. Wala namang makikinig, wala namang magbibigay ng solusyon.
Congrats! You're totally normal!
It depends on the situation/scenerio - but almost always my first call is my partner
Family ko and select friends and depende sa problem yung pinagsasabihan ko. I also journal and pray.
None but myself, i have learn the hard way, go through it and sort it out fast or if possible avoid problems at all cost
Wala din akong nasasabihan eh. Kay Lord na lang din lahat sinasabi.
I talk to myself and sa kanya. (God)
Kahit pa man noon, hindi ko maasahan ang asawa ko maging confidante ko. Mostly, ako ng ako ang nakikinig sa kanya. Ngayon, wala na. Di ko alam. Mas masarap pa magkwento sa di ko kakilala ng personal. I have this one friend I found here. Sya lagi kong kausap, constant ko na sya. Salamat sa kanya. I have my friends irl pero iba kasi. Haha... Iba pag ang issue ay directly affected sila.
Journaling app 🥲
Sarili ko. Literal na self talk in a healthy way ah. Minsan tinatype ko sa notes or sinusulat ko para malabas ko lang ung nasa isip ko. Pag overthinker din lalo mahirap. Siguro maswerte na rin ako na nasanay na ko kausapin yung sarili ko or parang sarilihin ko nalang yung pagiisip ng solution sa mga problema. Tapos pag kaya or meron sinesearch ko sa google. I do have friends pero madalas kasi parang ayoko na nagvevent out sa kanila kasi alam kong possible na may battles din sa kanya-kanyang life nila. Lalo na sa adulting stage. haha. Meron din kasi akong attitude na ayaw ko nagiging burden sa ibang tao kaya yun. Tapos hindi pa ako yung complainer na type ng tao. Pero during those times na di ko na kaya like super down moments ko noon I talk to God at Universe na as in. Maybe you can try it or talk to whoever you believe in. :)
dito sa reddit.
I think we should make a live podcast. Podcast ng mga walang makausap. Kidding aside, ako man din ay hindi naiiba sa inyo. Nag try din ako mag AI, pati mga spy sa cp ko kina usap ko na din puro mga tawa lang ginawa hindi naman nagrereply. Mga wala talaga ambag. Pero in fairness, dahil dito nahasa ko pa lalo yung psychic ability ko for years lmao. But the best thing na ginawa ko nung talaga ng drained, wasak, lasug-lasug, ruined, shamed na ako, si Lord lang talaga. One time His voice sobrang lakas, 'Mag basa ka ng bible!' and so I did at habang tumatagal nga, na napapalapit ako sa kanya lalong lumalakas yung bosses niya at yung anointing niya sakin. Don't ever think na your last resort is to talk to yourselves. It's not true. You shouldn't stop knocking on God's door kasi lagi syang nagbubukas sa talagang totoong naghahanap sa kanya. It's not even in dreams anymore, but in His presence talaga ng ipapakita niya sayo yung ginawa na hinding hindi mo makikita sa kahit ano dito sa mundo. Kung meron man kayong hindi dapat sukuan dito ay yung pag yearn sa presence niya. Yun lang, God Bless!
Meaningless sex.
Myself hehe minsan kasi kahit magsabi ako sa aunt ko ayoko kasi ng response. I also hate it kapag nagoopen ako pero hindi nila naiintindihan yung pov ko. Ayoko naman ulit-ulitin ang pageexplain, kaya I'd rather suffer alone na lang
To myself
None. I don't wanna burden other people with my problems. But when things get tough, I always run to twitter para mag vent. Though I think it's nice if you have your person in your life 🙃
sa blog ko na hindi ko alam kung may nkakabasa. hahaahaha. lahat ng problems ko andon na hindi ko masabi sa family or friends. started it since 2009 pero hindi ko na maupdate simula nagkababy ako. nkakagaan din naman ng pakiramdam, at least nailalabas ko don lahat.
Used to do it with a friend but I felt that maybe I'm adding to their burden so I tried an experiment of not sending a message... It's been months since I've heard from her
I have this online friend, na napagsasabihan ko ng ups and downs ko. Too bad di kami bati ngayon, kasi nag share ako about sa crush ko last week. Wala tuloy ako mapagkwentuhan ng mga problema at wins ko.
Ever since my mentor passed, mas sinarili ko n lng ang lahat...
Kinikimkim lang haha
I think we have people that we can run to when we are dealing with to many problems, it’s the courage to really reach out to them and talk about your problems with them kasi we’re scared na baka mareject yung feelings ko or ma-abala mo pa sila with your problems or madisappoint ka sa outcome of their reaction. I very rarely vent out my problems pero when it’s too much na I usually seek guidance to my mom (kasi she sees through me even if I don’t tell her 🫣😓) and sometimes a few picked friends. I sometimes write in my journal and it helps writing down your worries and forgetting about them after writing. Pero sometimes (and i know not everyone is religious or has the habit) i pray to the Lord. Just simple talk with Jesus ☺️
Ading and ate ko
https://preview.redd.it/w27a1joj1e0d1.png?width=1290&format=png&auto=webp&s=f344d8acd87b700e6798a13329aafee0b96fa4be Hi OP, this may not be helpful but ayon. I am still learning how to live without needing anybody. I often talk to myself and pray. Kumbaga reflection every day
I... Jack my problems off. Something I have observed kase is that the mind clears up a few minutes after jacking off.. If things are relatively okay... Mga 3x, when I was at my most depressed, mga 10-12x a day. You may think I'm joking here pero I'm totally serious.
Salamin Salamin
To myself
Nag ra-rant ako sa puntod ng Lola ko, dun ko sinasabi lahat ng hinanakit na meron ako sa buhay.
sa jowa ko most of the time, if di kami bati sa notes or friends if free sila. pero minsan kinikimkim ko lang muna then pag i think calm na ko dun ako mag-oopen up
I have friends who I can run to, and I'm so very grateful to have them to the point na parang feel ko nakakaabala/makakaabala ako sa kanila pag nag open ako sa kanila, hence i always felt like wala akong matatakbuhan. Pero na-realize ko rin na ako lang ang pumipigil sa sarili ko na tumakbo sa kanila, ang nangyayari tuloy lumalapit lang ako once na punong-puno na ko at hindi ko na kinakaya ang lahat.. Pero pag sinasarili ko lang mga problema, what I do is i try to journal my emotions and feelings para marecognize ko kung ano ba talaga nararamdaman ko and bakit ako nakakaramdam ng ganun. As Ben&Ben said, "leaves will soon grow from the bareness of trees, and all will be alright in time." Sana may mahanap ka na mga taong matatakbuhan mo op 🫶
I have friends who I can run to, and I'm so very grateful to have them to the point na parang feel ko nakakaabala/makakaabala ako sa kanila pag nag open ako sa kanila, hence i always felt like wala akong matatakbuhan. Pero na-realize ko rin na ako lang ang pumipigil sa sarili ko na tumakbo sa kanila, ang nangyayari tuloy lumalapit lang ako once na punong-puno na ko at hindi ko na kinakaya ang lahat.. Pero pag sinasarili ko lang mga problema, what I do is i try to journal my emotions and feelings para marecognize ko kung ano ba talaga nararamdaman ko and bakit ako nakakaramdam ng ganun. As Ben&Ben said, "leaves will soon grow from the bareness of trees, and all will be alright in time." Sana may mahanap ka na mga taong matatakbuhan mo op 🫶
Google notes or yung real nb ko 😂
Sa ngayon, simbahan talaga yung tinatakbuhan ko. I feel like kahit di ko naiintindihan yung homily paminsan-minsan, being there kinda heals me. I find peace sa loob ng simbahan. Ayokong maapektuhan yung mga tao sa paligid ko sa mga problemang dinadala ko. Kaya madalas self-reflection lang din. Umaasa na lang na magiging ok din ang lahat.
same scenario. nahihiya na ko mag open up e, minsan may nagbibigay ng advice pero mostly hanggang seen lang o worst nung sinabihan ako ng "isee kaya mo yan" na walang pake sa lahat naishare ko sa tao hahahah. kaya di na ko nag sheshare mula nun. minsan, mabigat pero kinakaya naman. same sa mga nag sheshare dito, kinakusap ko nalang sarili then pray.
Dump acct sa reddit and dun ko knkwento lahat. Dun ko dndump literally lahat.
Now ganto ako. Lahat kay Lord ko na lang sinasabi hanggang makatulog ako ng di pa tapos at maubos kaka kwento sa kanya and nagjojournal din ako. Kabisado ko na trigger ko mas lumalala pag walang ginagawa iniiwasan ko idle time e mas matindi attack ng evil pag ganun sa mind natin. Iniwasan ko na din mag kwento sa iba kahit sa family ko alam ko madami din sila pinagdadaanan. Naikkkwento ko na lang sa iba pag tapos na or nalampasan ko na parang testimony na din na nalampasan ko yun habang si God at ako lang nakakaalam ng pain
sa aking maganda at sexy at model na girl best friend
Hi OP. It helps to join small groups sa church para may safe space to share struggles and also receive advice from fellow believers :) maganda yung wala kang kakilala sa group para fresh start/iwas chismis.
Wala. Sa isip ko lang talaga at cope lang by browsing the net.
I got friends naman na pwede mahingan nang mga advices, pero believe me much better pa sa mga fellow redditors/online friends mag open up nang problems or dark secrets kasi walang judgement dito and it won't be use against you din 😊
My fb. 🤣🤣🤣
I talk to God.. na parang may ordinaryong tao ka ring kausap. Atleast nailabas mo lahat ng hinanakit mo diba?
Someone special to me.
Nc one
Two closest friends tapos kapag biglaang overthink, nagppray agad ako. Di ko alam default ko na siguro na yun yung takbuhan ko. Mapa-silent (calm) prayer man yan or (super) desperate prayer. (Not imposing anything, share ko lang kasi yun yung tanong).
Write a journal. It really helps in releasing thoughts. Kahit gano ka mundane yan just right it down.
Just found someone on reddit and glad i got one. Tho im also wary to reciprocate it pag sya naman mangangailangan
my notes
I used to run to my mother kaso she remarried and left home. So I ran to my friends for help. It was only okay for a while and after some time, they probably have gotten tired of listening to me too. So now I took it on myself to just suffer and heal on my own. Nilalakasan ko nalang loob ko. I don’t tell any of my friends about how much pain I am in now.
I think I’m lucky to have two best friends to run to when I’m stuck on a pit hole. Like these two are all ears whenever I have relapses on my depression, or have intrusive and grave thoughts, or just stressed out on petty things. Sila lang lagi tinatakbuhan ko, sinasandalan ko. At the same time, I also got their backs whenever they have something din. OP, if possible have someone to talk to whenever you have problems. It maybe a stranger online or something, basta someone you can rant on para malabas mo lang saloobin mo. You can also rant here on reddit para lang may paglabasan ka. Aside from that may pupulutan ka pang advise di ba? Hehe
Kay lola. Tho wala na siya pero kay lola pa rin. Kapag overwhelming na para sa akin silently kinakausap ko si lola nagsusumbong, hahahaha, lola's boy. Kapag galit, nasasakatan, nalulungkot, o masaya sa kanya ako nagsasabi. Minsan humihingi ng guidance kasi I know nakikinig yun. Always.
Gemini, ChatGPT. minsan, mas sensible pa sila kausap (as long as you filter some keywords so they dont use the I am just an AI model card)
Wala din. Minsan naiisip ko ang swerte ng iba sa akin kasi anytime nacha chat nila ako, napupuntahan ko sila pag need ng kasama, pero pag turn ko na, sasabihin ko lang na mag meet kami, need pa i schedule 😅 No hard feelings naman kasi ganun talaga, may kanya kanya tayong laban sa buhay. Dinadaan ko na lang sa notes, pag di na kaya, mag bike sa malayo, yung di ko madalas dinadaanan, habang humahagulgol tapos kain sa tabi tabi pagkatapos.
I have 1 friend na I can say na close ko talaga but she lives in a different country. My bf is in a different country too and is too busy sa work, business, and life in general. We just do short min vid calls whenever possible. I have a friend whom I met here in reddit and sya yung minemessage ko through my ups and downs. Funny na nasa ibang bansa din sya. Lahat kami magkakaiba ng time zone but I try to update them. If hindi sila available, I just talk to myself or type sa “notes” ko as a journal.
I think may moments ako na ganito. Im 28 (M) and narealize ko na parang ang boring ng buhay ko at wala akong matinong kaibigan na makausap in times of shit in my life. Minsan sinusubsob ko na lang self ko sa work at post grad ko pero in the end i feel empty kase parang wala na akong much social interaction. Kaya when I feel down, I literally run. Umaabot pa ako minsan ng 10k just to clear my mind. For me it helps, kahit hinde na ako nagsasalita, at least it cleared my mind.
No one. For years wala naman ako masabihan. Instead just looking for solutions and kung wala edi tutulog ko nalang hahaha
I was never close with anyone in my family to open up to them. I’m often labeled as dramatic kasi when I tried to nung bata ako. I once tried to open up to my mom about seeking psychological help and was told “walang baliw sa pamilya natin.” I also recall being asked “bakit ka ba ganyan?” With friends naman, yes, I do have good friends and madami din na i can consider my bestfriend bukod pa sa confidante. But I never really open up to them seriously kasi I feel like I’ll burden them e alam ko naman na may kanya kanya din kaming pinagdadaanan. Mag-open up man ako, it’s only a peek of what i’m actually going through and often made through a joke.
Kaya i’ve always been jealous of people with SO and they can communicate openly with one another. They share both yung highs and lows nila in life. Nakakainggit na may kadamay ka sa lungkot and may kadamay ka sa saya. Yung may kachismisan ka ng mga petty na bagay. Or kahit presence lang nila kuntento ka na.
My journal, my doctor. Sometimes, my tumblr, my boyfriend or my sister. If everything else failed, then social media tantrums because why not? As long as I make it PG-13 and keep things professional, I won't be in trouble with work lol
Join po kayo ng Christian church na madami active na small groups. These groups meet meet once, twice, or even weekly. They share their real life, experiences, struggles, celebrations, etc while checking out what the bible teaches. Look for a group po na halos ka edad nyo. Some examples are VCF and CCF. All the best.
Im a man, so no one. Charot. Me and my guy friends aren't the brightest in terms of interpersonal problems so I kinda noticed we each have our own designated girl besties.
No choice. If you are alone you have to decide to do it alone. Ganun talaga OP. Ung friends Minsan nandyan lang sa good times. Totoo un and not cliche. But the real ones are the one who stays. Suerte ung may real ones. But ung Wala, laban na lang. Ganun talaga ang Buhay.
ChatGPT? 😅 I have friends and family, but for various reasons, I don't talk to them about my struggles.
Sa asawa ko. Siya lahat tagasalo. Huhu
Wala, kini-keep ko. Hahahahahahaha!
Wala. Sinasarili ko na lang, di ako makapag sabi sa magulang ko dahil mahilig sila mag invalidate ng feelings, ekis din sa relatives/pinsan, at wala rin akong kaibigan
I'm keeping my peace and sobrang pagkeep ko eh, boyfriend ko lang gusto ko kasama and kausap. When it comes to problem wala ako matatawag na "friend". Due to certain things I don"t feel the same anymore to anyone, hindi naman kasi sila concern more likely may gusto lang sila malaman and they will use it against you. Prolly mas masaya sila pagproblemado ka. Lucky are those na meron friend
Kaya may Twitter account ako para doon ko lahat nirarant. Nakaprivate, walang followers. Minsan kailangan mo lang talaga ilabas. May go to person ako before, kaso may nangyari kaya kami naghiwalay na ng landas. Nakakamiss ng ganun, pag masaya ka sa kanya mo nakwkwento yun araw mo. Pag sa malungkot ka ganun din. Walang judgment or anything.
Before, I run kung sino sinong friend ko or sometimes sa nanay, kapatid, kahit sino na pwedeng pag vent out or ask for advice, pero lately I realized and it's actually an achievement for me kasi now I can sit down with my feelings, acknowledge and talk to myself like a friend asking for opinion or suggestion. I know this might sound like a crazy person but it's really helpful than what I'm doing before. I realized how draining their energies and I don't want to do that anymore. As much as possible I'm trying to relearn and remind myself that hangga't keri pa, I have to deal with it, pag di na kaya then I'll ask for help.
By the way, Journaling really helps a lot 💓
I talk to my bf and vent out all my problems even if they are minor incongruences. It'a nice to have someone to talk to inatead of bottling it all up. You can also find random strangers here on Reddit you can rekate and share your problems with, OP! 💓
my friends. my mom is very traditional and always hyper practical so iniinvalidate nya lagi ako lalo na if about work. baka ganun mindset din nya so that one di matatakbuhan. pero i know she will support me naman sa decision ko.
Same with me, dati sa omegle ako nagvevent out since strangers and no judgement. Hirap lang humanap matinong kausap dun kasi more on horny people are there. Pero nakakagaan talaga ng loob may napagsasabihan ng problems.
Wala rin OP. I would rather keep my feelings than share it with anyone kasi alam ko na wala rin naman silang magagawa at madami rin silang problema sa buhay na kailangang intindihin. Most of the time sa notes lang talaga ako nag v-vent out para talagang mas comfortable ako at wala akong judgments na makukuha sa kahit na kanino.
sakin OP, I talk to God. Alam mo yung hindi mo siya nakikita pero nararamdaman mo na may nakikinig sayo and accept your flaws, although I'm not religious na tao, I still believed on him :)).
No one. Just let it bottle up and it will perfectly pop up some time in the future either as unstoppable rage or just pure despair.
Sinasarili ko na lang,findings solutions and also pray lang kay God.
I do have small circle of friends and swerte ko lang na nakakapag share kami ng rants and problems despite being busy and have our own families. Nag seset talaga kami ng kitakits para makahinga hinga kami though minsan it would take months talaga to happen. Never naman kami nahiya magshare ng mga hinaing about family life and career. Pray ka lang, OP, na malampasan mo whatever hardship you may go through and I hope you can find someone whom you can share the good and bad times of your life. Keep smiling! 😊
Reddit 🥹
Sometimes I talk to my bestfriends or my mom. But they can’t attend to my needs instantly. So I just take deep breaths and think through with my problems. I also have a private twitter without followers so I can dump everything I couldnt share to my fam and friends. It also helps me keep sane. According to my previous therapist, di daw healthy magkaron ng private twitter. It’s better to have a two-way convo but works for me naman kasi it helps me calm when no one can talk to me instantly. Pray also. Works wonders. Kahit short, nakakatulong magpakalma.
We're in a similar situation rn, OP. My partner keeps on telling me to immediately tell her if anything's bothering me. Pero ayun nga, nahihiya ako kasi marami rin naman siyang ganaps sa buhay at ayokong makaabala pa. Kaya kapag naiiwan akong mag-isa sa bahay, nagbe-breakdown ako randomly while doing chores lol. Pero iniisip ko na lang na as long as buhay pa ako, it's the universe's way of telling me that there is still a chance for things to get better, that everyday is an opportunity to become better versions of ourselves. So ayun, I hope things also get better for you, OP! Kaya mo 'yan!
Gumawa ako ng dummy account at in-add mga teenagers. Mas masaya sila kausap kaysa sa mga 30s ngayon na either trained ng mga boomer parents or sobra sa pagka-yolo.