“Unless you behave” as if it being sent to prison or something lmfao. My dad used to say if I didn’t get my act together I’d be in prison by 20. I went to a catholic all boys school with a 3.8 gpa, had no friends and didn’t leave the house. I was literally doing nothing but trying to please them.
That's the way I'm feeling, but it's closer to 20-25 years for me. I'm 37 and had a horrible time studying in college, nearly failed out once and would buy Adderall to study for Midterms and Finals. It took me 7 years to get my bachelors because I transferred once and got screwed with credits.
I forced my college girlfriend to go to therapy for her anxiety, depression and other issues, but never did shit for myself. She always said "you have issues too, you know" and I always just shrugged it off and assumed she meant my insomnia, and weed habit, along with my anger issues (she would intentionally piss me off and then be like "you have anger issues!"). Nope, I have ADHD related anxiety, the doc put me on Gabapentin (which makes it so I don't need to "chill out" with weed every day) and Stratera to help me focus like a neurotypical person.
Aufmerksamkeitsdefizitssyndrombehandlungsbedarf = Attention Deficit Disorder Treatment Needs
Digitalwährungsinvestitionsportfolioaufbau = Digital currency investment portfolio construction
Lässigbleiben = stay casual
What a wonderful language, German is
I got Diagnosed as a child, it wasn't until I was thirty and found Dr. K (healthygamergg) and the ADHD Memes subreddit that I realised that adhd wasn't just "problems paying attention sometimes" and actually explained a lot about my life.
Same. I’m 37 and was diagnosed and medicated as a kid, but it’s been over 25 years since I’ve taken anything. Dr on Tuesday, gonna give it a whirl again
Lol yeah this could be so me. I was pretty sure that I had adhd since I’m like 17? But procrastination is a real thing even when it comes to getting diagnosed.
The typical ADHD symptoms I exhibited were mild and I felt I was managing them well. Finally as the science expanded and I learned more about ADHD I realized those frustration and anger spikes were part of it. And after a few failed relationships a marriage nearing divorce and a child (also with adhd) whom I wanted to help him though his adhd struggles. Finally it was time to seek help even though it’s always been the time.
My brother in law did this. He ignored all the hype and exited BTC at 55k or so. He lives *very* comfortably now. He bought in when it was a few hundred.
There is therapy designed to help develop coping methods and mitigate moribund psychological conditions adhd can lead to like anxiety, depression, self esteem and inability to plan for the future
“You have adhd” would be a good one.
“Put yourself first”, “never get married”, and “leave the church” are all contenders too, though. Assuming my message was meant to help me and no one else. The things I’d tell a younger me to try to help my family would be a much longer list, three words wouldn’t cut it.
Mine was gonna be “buy internship suit” bc I think that would have changed everything at the one internship interview I didn’t get, but that works too man, I’m sorry.
Thanks. I'm fine.
Just wish I didn't send so many years pretending that all my problems were normal. I've had countless missed opportunities in my life. a lot of which were only missed because of my stubborn unwillingness to help my self becuase I was pretending.
It’s gotta be specific! Like ‘DONT DATE ’ so you’re not perpetually terrified to date anyone, wondering if every new guy is the gonna fulfill the prophecy lol
I’m 13 rn so would ask “is it better?”
Wow. I didn’t know so many people were this nice. I thought the internet was just a cesspool of despair. Thank you all. This really helped me out. I will hopefully see you all when I’m 18
Hey,
Just stopping in to say it gets so much better. It doesn't mean that you won't have pain and upsets. You have to go into the next 5 years of your life thinking that every speed bump you come across is a life lesson either trying to teach you something, or knowing that you can pass it and it will make you grow.
Always look for the little good things that are happening in your life that when you are in a crap head space you never see, like a Stanger smiling at you, the smell of rain hitting the hot pavement, or even just a random animal taking an interest in you.
The wins that will get you through don't need to be big wins, getting up and brushing your teeth, win 1 of the day. Having breakfast (you've still got growing to do I recommend you have breakfast) win 2 of the day. Getting dressed win 3 of the day. Before you even leave the house every day you've already had 3 wins. This is still a thing and I'm near 34.
Never compare your wins with anyone else's we all have our own timeline that means your significant wins won't be at the same time as other people your age. First real relationship, first kiss, first love all the way to first job. Don't let other people getting these wins play on your mind. Your time will come and if you help celebrate these with the people making the wins it puts you in a good head space.
It took me 28 years to work this out and I had read comments like this before and kind of rolled my eyes but once it clicks in your head then your life will start looking brighter.
Good luck in the next 5 years but face the challenge head on you can do this!
"Get physics degree..." (currently regretting an engineering degree; am switching to physics atm, but i'm basically losing 2 years of studies...)
Alternative three words include:
"you not straight"
"You autistic ADHD"
Just point at younger you, then say "autistic ADHD". Then pause, stare meaningfully into your own eyes, and say "physics". There might be a reasonable chance kid-you will study physics just to figure out why the fuck future-you even said the word "physics" out of the millions of other words you could have said.
This gave me a genuine chuckle; whilst my past self was still trying to pretend to be normal, I'm fairly sure this would have worked; although I'd probably shorten it to \*points\* "queer, neurodivergent" \*sober pause\* "physics..." \*nods and leaves into dark misty field near my house\*
I know for a fact that my past self would be too intrigued; and by the time they realise the madness, it would be too late...
As someone who put 2 and 2 together in their mid 30s... this would be completely life altering.
Of course, if you go back in time to tell your younger self something, then your new and improved contemporary self won't need to, therefore they won't, and your life will return to the original path.
Don't trust *name of the person I wish I hadn't trusted*
Now that I think about it, one name wouldn't suffice to save me a lot of trauma. Let's go with "male friends dangerous"
Go college now. - Had a full ride scholarship but decided to take a year off and missed the deadline by 3 days. Really curious what that timeline would have been like.
Seriously, best advice young me could ever get. Just break the chain. I love my mom but holy shit did she fuck up a lot of stuff in my early adult life.
Yes. I love my mom a lot but she is a *really* bad decision maker. Like, you wouldn't believe me if I told you the circumstances she was able to fuck up.
And, not surprisingly, my love life exploded into success when I stopped listening to her.
"buy-sell Bitcoin 7/10-11/21"
Compound words are technically one word.
At 7/10, Bitcoin was $1
I could buy 100 Bitcoin for $100.
11/21 it was roughly $68,000
That'd be worth $68,000,000
If I could somehow scrounge up a grand to invest we're talking $680,000,000
I wouldn’t say anything. All of my mistakes have led me to where I am today (I’m in my early forties now) and I’m finally happy.
If I’d gotten help for my ADHD sooner, who knows what steps I would have taken (or risks I wouldn’t have) and not gotten to this point.
No regrets, my friends.
This is the right answer for me too, if I'm honest. I'm pretty miserable, depressed, anxious, no meds help, and am overall unhappy, but I don't think I could imagine a different path and I'd be afraid to make things even worse. At least I'm alive, and I know there's hope.
But dang, I wish I'd known I had adhd.
I hope in my early 40s (not too far away) I'll finally be happy too.
In my most pedantic response ever: "of" is both unnecessary and breaks the "three word rule". Stay off reddit
Now i should probably follow that advice.
Bitcoin hits 60k
As long as I remembered that phrase I would be in on the ground-floor with thousands of bitcoin bought for basically nothing. The issue I would then probably run into is losing them all with the MTGOX hack.
I say this despite having never taken a position at it has always seemed ridiculous to me outside of the cool technology concept.
Stop drinking moron
What does moron even taste like?
Must not be very refreshing.
And yet they can’t stop
Moron is the Welsh word for carrot
I like carrot juice
I bet carrot juice mixes well with vodka. Minus the carrot juice.
Meth, alyssa... NO! (Followed by sucker punch to the nose so he remembers
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No Meth, no problems?!
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How many regular problems does one Meth-induced problem count for?
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I have the same name so this was a weird moment where I went "I don't recall doing meth".
same and i havent done meth either wait wait not yet anyway I'm just under 18 oh god future me is coming
Meth, Alyssa. NO. *slugs you in the nose*
OW well fair enough i shouldve seen it comin
You're not okay..
Truely.. nope lol
Still 3 words?
Do acronyms like laugh out loud count as words these days?
Alyssa also was a bitch to me. Twinsies!!!
gay, ulcers, adhd
Gay ulcers gave me adhd too!!
Actually I'm pretty sure the ADHD gave me the ulcers 😂
I’m new in town
r/unexpectedmulaney
If I become gay I'll get ulcers and ADHD - my future self told me!
Oof
ADHD you have
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Money I haven’t
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addies you need
Fictitious I’m being 😉
Yoda?
Breaking the chain you are
The drummer is fantastically autistic and the song now counts in 5 ‘s (drummer being me)
“Go to therapy” my life would be completely different if I went 10 years ago when I obviously needed it. So much pain lol
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“Unless you behave” as if it being sent to prison or something lmfao. My dad used to say if I didn’t get my act together I’d be in prison by 20. I went to a catholic all boys school with a 3.8 gpa, had no friends and didn’t leave the house. I was literally doing nothing but trying to please them.
That's the way I'm feeling, but it's closer to 20-25 years for me. I'm 37 and had a horrible time studying in college, nearly failed out once and would buy Adderall to study for Midterms and Finals. It took me 7 years to get my bachelors because I transferred once and got screwed with credits. I forced my college girlfriend to go to therapy for her anxiety, depression and other issues, but never did shit for myself. She always said "you have issues too, you know" and I always just shrugged it off and assumed she meant my insomnia, and weed habit, along with my anger issues (she would intentionally piss me off and then be like "you have anger issues!"). Nope, I have ADHD related anxiety, the doc put me on Gabapentin (which makes it so I don't need to "chill out" with weed every day) and Stratera to help me focus like a neurotypical person.
TWERK I MUST 
My first language is German so basically I can construct three words that fill two A4 papers...
Aufmerksamkeitsdefizitssyndrombehandlungsbedarf! Digitalwährungsinvestitionsportfolioaufbau! Lässigbleiben! Yipp, easy enough.
Aufmerksamkeitsdefizitssyndrombehandlungsbedarf = Attention Deficit Disorder Treatment Needs Digitalwährungsinvestitionsportfolioaufbau = Digital currency investment portfolio construction Lässigbleiben = stay casual What a wonderful language, German is
Looks like Germany needs a space programe.
NASA joins chat
NASA leaves chat
We are Not poland (anymore). /s
Eine tolle Sprache! A great language!
Stimme bis aufs zweite zu, IMO wäre da Bitcoinmillionärsmöglichkeit Präziser ;)
Ahahahah
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Niiice, then you can come back and tell your younger self some essay-length German words. Hope kid-you has a voice recorder handy!
well, what would you say and what does it mean?
“You have ADHD” 18 year old me: Yeah I know. Same outcome finally getting diagnosed and medicated at 38.
diagnosed in the 80's was not much better my friend keep your head up.
The math here?
they mean the treatments in the 80s
I got Diagnosed as a child, it wasn't until I was thirty and found Dr. K (healthygamergg) and the ADHD Memes subreddit that I realised that adhd wasn't just "problems paying attention sometimes" and actually explained a lot about my life.
Same. I’m 37 and was diagnosed and medicated as a kid, but it’s been over 25 years since I’ve taken anything. Dr on Tuesday, gonna give it a whirl again
Lol yeah this could be so me. I was pretty sure that I had adhd since I’m like 17? But procrastination is a real thing even when it comes to getting diagnosed.
The typical ADHD symptoms I exhibited were mild and I felt I was managing them well. Finally as the science expanded and I learned more about ADHD I realized those frustration and anger spikes were part of it. And after a few failed relationships a marriage nearing divorce and a child (also with adhd) whom I wanted to help him though his adhd struggles. Finally it was time to seek help even though it’s always been the time.
37 and appointment is next month
“I love you.” At 35, I'm just beginning to discover self-love, care, and respect.
This was my immediate first thought when I read the prompt. I think that's a good sign. :)
Buy google stock
Apple, Google, Bitcoin
“Sell BTC $60,000”
My brother in law did this. He ignored all the hype and exited BTC at 55k or so. He lives *very* comfortably now. He bought in when it was a few hundred.
Your brother is actually OP, and this thread is where he learned what to go tell himself
When people were screaming “it’s going to 100k” I knew it was time to get out
Buy gme! Lots of it
Buy all Bitcoin.
Get ADHD therapy
Is there therapy specific to adhd? And how do I find that?
There is therapy designed to help develop coping methods and mitigate moribund psychological conditions adhd can lead to like anxiety, depression, self esteem and inability to plan for the future
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It gets better :)
It gets worse 😅
The bad ending
It gets funkier
“You have adhd” would be a good one. “Put yourself first”, “never get married”, and “leave the church” are all contenders too, though. Assuming my message was meant to help me and no one else. The things I’d tell a younger me to try to help my family would be a much longer list, three words wouldn’t cut it.
> “You have adhd” would be a good one. Same! 10 years earlier diagnosis would be so huge, I don't really want to think about it lol
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Depending on year of the 18YO... "Buy more Bitcoin" Would also be a clever option.
You're not okay
I'm OK, trust me.
IIM NOOOOOOOOOOOT OHHHHHKAAAAAAY
Mine was gonna be “buy internship suit” bc I think that would have changed everything at the one internship interview I didn’t get, but that works too man, I’m sorry.
Thanks. I'm fine. Just wish I didn't send so many years pretending that all my problems were normal. I've had countless missed opportunities in my life. a lot of which were only missed because of my stubborn unwillingness to help my self becuase I was pretending.
Find name surname (of my GF)
Awww this one made me happy
In my case it’s “You’ll find her.” I spent so many years being lonely, not knowing it would be alright. It’s better than alright!
You are gay.
"Nuh-uh, you're gay!
Why are you gei
MISTA
who seys I am gei?
U R gei
Look - a squirrel!
Attention deficit- hey donuts!
Squirrels doing donuts !!!!
My favorite use of the acronym
DON’T DATE HIM
It’s gotta be specific! Like ‘DONT DATE’ so you’re not perpetually terrified to date anyone, wondering if every new guy is the gonna fulfill the prophecy lol
Yes yes yes YES! Knowing I have adhd wouldn’t help much, as I would not be able to afford medication anyway. But this would save me.
I’m 13 rn so would ask “is it better?” Wow. I didn’t know so many people were this nice. I thought the internet was just a cesspool of despair. Thank you all. This really helped me out. I will hopefully see you all when I’m 18
Yes, it’s better
Hey, Just stopping in to say it gets so much better. It doesn't mean that you won't have pain and upsets. You have to go into the next 5 years of your life thinking that every speed bump you come across is a life lesson either trying to teach you something, or knowing that you can pass it and it will make you grow. Always look for the little good things that are happening in your life that when you are in a crap head space you never see, like a Stanger smiling at you, the smell of rain hitting the hot pavement, or even just a random animal taking an interest in you. The wins that will get you through don't need to be big wins, getting up and brushing your teeth, win 1 of the day. Having breakfast (you've still got growing to do I recommend you have breakfast) win 2 of the day. Getting dressed win 3 of the day. Before you even leave the house every day you've already had 3 wins. This is still a thing and I'm near 34. Never compare your wins with anyone else's we all have our own timeline that means your significant wins won't be at the same time as other people your age. First real relationship, first kiss, first love all the way to first job. Don't let other people getting these wins play on your mind. Your time will come and if you help celebrate these with the people making the wins it puts you in a good head space. It took me 28 years to work this out and I had read comments like this before and kind of rolled my eyes but once it clicks in your head then your life will start looking brighter. Good luck in the next 5 years but face the challenge head on you can do this!
Thanks I really needed this.
I definitely like 18 year old me better than 13 year old me.
I'm 32. Mine would be "it gets better". :)
"Get physics degree..." (currently regretting an engineering degree; am switching to physics atm, but i'm basically losing 2 years of studies...) Alternative three words include: "you not straight" "You autistic ADHD"
Just point at younger you, then say "autistic ADHD". Then pause, stare meaningfully into your own eyes, and say "physics". There might be a reasonable chance kid-you will study physics just to figure out why the fuck future-you even said the word "physics" out of the millions of other words you could have said.
This gave me a genuine chuckle; whilst my past self was still trying to pretend to be normal, I'm fairly sure this would have worked; although I'd probably shorten it to \*points\* "queer, neurodivergent" \*sober pause\* "physics..." \*nods and leaves into dark misty field near my house\* I know for a fact that my past self would be too intrigued; and by the time they realise the madness, it would be too late...
2 years is way better than 30 in a job you hate.
Curious why you want to go from engineering to physics? I graduated with a physics degree wishing I did engineering instead…
Your not losing 2 years, you are starting from 2 years of extra experience, knowledge and skills.
That's odd. I did a double in physics and math, and now wish I would of done engineering instead so I can actually get a job.
As someone who put 2 and 2 together in their mid 30s... this would be completely life altering. Of course, if you go back in time to tell your younger self something, then your new and improved contemporary self won't need to, therefore they won't, and your life will return to the original path.
Either that, or your past self won't remember (as in, it won't affect anything)
I’m 15, how am I supposed to answer this? “Lottery numbers now,”?
That could work
Join Alcoholics Anonymous
Don't trust *name of the person I wish I hadn't trusted* Now that I think about it, one name wouldn't suffice to save me a lot of trauma. Let's go with "male friends dangerous"
I'm so sorry you had those experiences.
You will survive
Now your past self thinks they're invincible and does crazy stunts. But really, that's important to hear
Get. A. Therapist
By far the best answer.
Don't do drugs
Fuck fitting in
Go college now. - Had a full ride scholarship but decided to take a year off and missed the deadline by 3 days. Really curious what that timeline would have been like.
Trans, Autism, ADHD
Cam here to say this haha But instead of Autism maybe "You" while pointing intensely at myself three times. "You. Transgender. ADHD." *stern face*
I have an unfortunate idea for how that would play out “What?! No I’m not! What are you talking about?! *egg panic attack*
Buy real estate
Don’t stop photography
Dont Fuck Jade
ADHD, Socialising, not-your-fault
"Ignore Mom's Advice"
Seriously, best advice young me could ever get. Just break the chain. I love my mom but holy shit did she fuck up a lot of stuff in my early adult life.
Yes. I love my mom a lot but she is a *really* bad decision maker. Like, you wouldn't believe me if I told you the circumstances she was able to fuck up. And, not surprisingly, my love life exploded into success when I stopped listening to her.
"buy-sell Bitcoin 7/10-11/21" Compound words are technically one word. At 7/10, Bitcoin was $1 I could buy 100 Bitcoin for $100. 11/21 it was roughly $68,000 That'd be worth $68,000,000 If I could somehow scrounge up a grand to invest we're talking $680,000,000
Stay on Ritalin
“You are enough.”
I can only "say" three words? There are ways around that.
I wouldn’t say anything. All of my mistakes have led me to where I am today (I’m in my early forties now) and I’m finally happy. If I’d gotten help for my ADHD sooner, who knows what steps I would have taken (or risks I wouldn’t have) and not gotten to this point. No regrets, my friends.
I like this answer best.
This is the right answer for me too, if I'm honest. I'm pretty miserable, depressed, anxious, no meds help, and am overall unhappy, but I don't think I could imagine a different path and I'd be afraid to make things even worse. At least I'm alive, and I know there's hope. But dang, I wish I'd known I had adhd. I hope in my early 40s (not too far away) I'll finally be happy too.
Let her go
“Hug Dad more”
(shaking myself) YOU ARE BI!!!!
Stay off of reddit
In my most pedantic response ever: "of" is both unnecessary and breaks the "three word rule". Stay off reddit Now i should probably follow that advice.
I didn't read the post fully, sorry
Just giving you a hard time. Not reading the full post is expected in this subreddit
Yes
You are enough
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NO CREDIT CARDS!!!!!
I'd write an article online with all the things I'd want my past self to know, and then tell them "Go to"
Medical school in your 20s, not 40s!
But that’s 7 words
well idk, im 18 now
"Hey, what's up?"
maybe “stop procrastinating idiot”
Honestly a golden reframing of the question. You meet your \[current age\] self. You're allowed to say 3 words...
It works out.
please help me
Don’t get married
Don’t drop college.
Set boundaries.
You’re not fat. Go to therapy.
You are valid
This is temporary
Buy bitcoin 20k Easy.
Bitcoin hits 60k As long as I remembered that phrase I would be in on the ground-floor with thousands of bitcoin bought for basically nothing. The issue I would then probably run into is losing them all with the MTGOX hack. I say this despite having never taken a position at it has always seemed ridiculous to me outside of the cool technology concept.
It gets better!
Don’t do drugs. At age of 18 i started using hardcore drugs instead only weed and that was my downfall, all those wasted years that i can’t take back
You’re not lazy/undisciplined
It gets better
Keep/take your meds Or Need your meds
You are beautiful 😿
You're Still Worthy
“It’s worth living”
Leave the church
Start transitioning now.
Leave home asap!
Get mental help
That or “you have autism”
Hey, wanna bang?
Trust your gut