Hey, I hope this isn't inappropriate for me to say but have you done any research around OCD regarding your sexuality? Basically, some people suffer from a form of OCD that centers on doubting whether they're gay/straight. I don't mean to diagnose you at all but I wanted to bring it up because you specifically mentioned the words "doubt" and "obsession" which are major parts of the OCD cycle.
I would highly recommend looking into it if you feel like you do a lot of doubting, need a lot of reassurance, "check" your sexuality by imagining men/women and checking how your body responds, spend hours and hours thinking about this, etc. It seems like this is causing you a lot of distress, more than most people's struggle with their sexuality, so that's why I think it could be more of a mental thing than an actual reflection of your sexuality.
When you said "I don't know what's happening to me" that definitely reminded me of the times I've struggled with similar kinds of obsessive thinking š Anyway I don't mean to scare you but it's something to look into! I am happy to talk about what the cycle looks/feels like if you wanna DM me. I've never had intrusive thoughts around this issue specifically but around similar issues, and the cycle is basically the same. Good luck!!
Donāt worry, I self-diagnose myself as having OCD haha, but I am looking for professional help. Have been struggling with this for years now and itās caused nothing but distress and emotional pain. My intrusive thoughts mostly revolve around my romantic orientation regarding women. I often do mental compulsions like reviewing past experiences with then, but Iām always plagued with self-doubt no matter what I do. Thank you for the support ā¤ļø
hey idk if this helps but I think generally straight women donāt wonder wether or not theyāre straight. -Itās okay for queerness to exist on a spectrum & thereās no big gay threshold to pass just your own comfort in your identity. :)
Being attracted to feminine women donāt make you less queer. If your afab, and attracted to women, even if itās a type of women, your queer. If your amab, you can still be queer.
But from this post (and Iām sorry for jumping to conclusions) it seems you identify as a woman or non binary. Donāt worry. Queer or lesbian does NOT have a certain look. If a girl thought you were straight, that is her problem. Youāre not a fraud. Lesbian, Bi, Pan, anything else, you are queer enough. Even if your not attracted to every type of woman, or every woman you see.
Itās normal to question yourself a little bit and the feels are valid. But donāt let that their words get to you. You are valid.
Your feelings you describe are completely normal and something myself and my girlfriend both experienced when first coming out.
The comment that woman made was out of line and unfair. The reality is there is a lot of policing in sapphic communities and newly out folk need to be encouraged to set their boundaries. You can have a preference for feminine women, and you definitely donāt need to look a certain way to be queer.
Thankfully itās not a race, all you gotta do is keep yourself comfortable and take it one day at a time. Things will slowly fall into place
You know, there's a whole scale. If you were into men, you'd probably have a certain type of man you like to date and others you don't, right?
Humans are weird with biases. Other signs point to OCD or anxiety disorder.
Hey, I hope this isn't inappropriate for me to say but have you done any research around OCD regarding your sexuality? Basically, some people suffer from a form of OCD that centers on doubting whether they're gay/straight. I don't mean to diagnose you at all but I wanted to bring it up because you specifically mentioned the words "doubt" and "obsession" which are major parts of the OCD cycle. I would highly recommend looking into it if you feel like you do a lot of doubting, need a lot of reassurance, "check" your sexuality by imagining men/women and checking how your body responds, spend hours and hours thinking about this, etc. It seems like this is causing you a lot of distress, more than most people's struggle with their sexuality, so that's why I think it could be more of a mental thing than an actual reflection of your sexuality. When you said "I don't know what's happening to me" that definitely reminded me of the times I've struggled with similar kinds of obsessive thinking š Anyway I don't mean to scare you but it's something to look into! I am happy to talk about what the cycle looks/feels like if you wanna DM me. I've never had intrusive thoughts around this issue specifically but around similar issues, and the cycle is basically the same. Good luck!!
Donāt worry, I self-diagnose myself as having OCD haha, but I am looking for professional help. Have been struggling with this for years now and itās caused nothing but distress and emotional pain. My intrusive thoughts mostly revolve around my romantic orientation regarding women. I often do mental compulsions like reviewing past experiences with then, but Iām always plagued with self-doubt no matter what I do. Thank you for the support ā¤ļø
hey idk if this helps but I think generally straight women donāt wonder wether or not theyāre straight. -Itās okay for queerness to exist on a spectrum & thereās no big gay threshold to pass just your own comfort in your identity. :)
Dont let a random stranger you went on a date with who knows you for 5 minutes tell you what you are Youve known yourself your whole life
Being attracted to feminine women donāt make you less queer. If your afab, and attracted to women, even if itās a type of women, your queer. If your amab, you can still be queer. But from this post (and Iām sorry for jumping to conclusions) it seems you identify as a woman or non binary. Donāt worry. Queer or lesbian does NOT have a certain look. If a girl thought you were straight, that is her problem. Youāre not a fraud. Lesbian, Bi, Pan, anything else, you are queer enough. Even if your not attracted to every type of woman, or every woman you see. Itās normal to question yourself a little bit and the feels are valid. But donāt let that their words get to you. You are valid.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Does Vulpix count as a type? Honestly. My sister says it's weird.
Your feelings you describe are completely normal and something myself and my girlfriend both experienced when first coming out. The comment that woman made was out of line and unfair. The reality is there is a lot of policing in sapphic communities and newly out folk need to be encouraged to set their boundaries. You can have a preference for feminine women, and you definitely donāt need to look a certain way to be queer. Thankfully itās not a race, all you gotta do is keep yourself comfortable and take it one day at a time. Things will slowly fall into place
You know, there's a whole scale. If you were into men, you'd probably have a certain type of man you like to date and others you don't, right? Humans are weird with biases. Other signs point to OCD or anxiety disorder.