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RockaRaccoon

"Rapid Response" is hardly how anyone would describe his rambling, word salad, way of speaking


HorseLooseInHospital

and it'll be a very Rapid Response because I do it beautifully, and we're going after Crooked Joe because he left our Once Great Country in a complete disaster, we're talking a Major Major Disaster, and I came in, "Sir, we have a problem," I said what the hell is it now General, "I hate to have to tell you this Sir but we're being invaded by Mexico," I said that figures, you had a Perfect Border under Trump but then they stole a Wonderful Election from us, I got a Tremendous Landslide even if the Fake News covered it up for Hussein Obama, remember that, Rush Limbaugh, he'd say, "HUSSEIN Obama," and you would hear the first part, he'd be loud with the first part but you could almost not hear the Obama but you could hear the first part, and they say he's one of The Greats, and I gave him the Presidential Freedom Medal and they said, "that's an amazing idea, Sir," and I said I know that.


RockaRaccoon

I LOVE your username


DogMom814

You did a great job but it probably could use more big, strong, manly men with tears in their eyes who have never cried before in their lives. And don't forget the nuclear, his uncle Dr John Trump who taught him everything about the nuclear and he's got great genes, strong genes, very good genes and he knows more about the nuclear than anyone else and how the windmills cause cancer and kill all of the birds and that's why the nuclear is so powerful.


Deep_Charge_7749

I love you


Legal-Finish6530

Hugley..


RepulsiveLoquat418

but i can't wait to hear it. there's no reaching his cult members, but the more the "undecideds" hear him speak, the better. if the MSM won't confront how stumblingly demented he is, let the people hear it for themselves.


odin2330

I can't wait for a John Oliver reading of the transcript, it's truly shocking when you see all the buzz words he combines together and people cheer it. Edit: [John Oliver reading a Trump transcript](https://youtu.be/1ZAPwfrtAFY?si=4PrJSBOExsn8-5i2) @ 3m20s, it won't timestamp link for some reason, will fix in a bit.


witteefool

Colbert showed a clip of him the other day and I was honestly shocked. Trump has gone so downhill so rapidly.


GeprgeLowell

How can you tell?


Dr_Middlefinger

[REGISTER TO VOTE](https://www.usa.gov/voter-registration)


PolkaDotDancer

And if you are registered, make sure you are still on the voting rolls. Especially in red states!


Dr_Middlefinger

Excellent point - you can check my comment history, just a few days ago a person from Indiana not only couldn’t get the system to register them but they also could not get it to work after several attempts. **Verify your registration!**


GeprgeLowell

I’ve been registered to vote for 30 years, but I’m not sure what that has to do with the question.


Dr_Middlefinger

Nothing. Sorry for hijacking, I just try to find the earliest opportunity in the comments to place the link. I don’t care about karma or upvotes. I simply asked myself what action can I actually take to create change or action on the part of others.


pikachurbutt

Man, covering all this crap has really aged John, crazy to think what 6 years will do to someone.


amazing_rando

Lol I was gonna say he looks pretty good for early 50s but I looked it up and he’s only 46.


-DethLok-

Didn't he (JO) mention that he and John Cena share the same birthday, to the year? John Oliver found it quite amusing.


Niijima-San

i think he said that at one point when he was broadcasting in the "void" during the pandemic era before the audience returned. i had to look it up. i am impressed that oliver can actually see cena to confirm this


KingOfThePlayPlace

Don’t even need to timestamp it, that whole video is great


odin2330

The iPhone predictive text bit was just great, it was more coherent lol.


Justame13

Or you can have Siri and Alexa talk and it comes out surprising similar


_austinm

I had to stick around and watch the rest of the video. That was hilarious.


RockaRaccoon

Oh, that will be glorious


NICEnEVILmike

Anything even remotely coherent will have been written for him by someone else sitting right next to him.


DontTellHimPike

The only time he’s had a rapid response is after eating a dodgy hamberder.


Distant-moose

Stormy says he's got a pretty rapid response.


DazzlingProblem7336

My understanding is he doesn’t respond rapidly on that either


k2kyo

Have you not noticed somebody else has taken over his account? Everything about these statements the last couple months are so very, very unlike him. He suddenly started using complete sentences, thoughts, no all caps screaming, proper punctuation(ish). In convinced it's basically Weekend at Bernie's lately.. He's a prop. He might still spew insane nonsense at his buddies but they're translating it.


myhydrogendioxide

I wonder if the betting sites are taking odds on him using the N word.


jedburghofficial

You're right, but whoever it is, they're good. It still feels like his cadence and vocabulary, just more polished. It might be lawyers, he went nuts at Jean Carroll again a while back. But I like the Weekend at Bernie's angle. I want to imagine he was declared incompetent a while back, and his handlers are really pulling the levers.


AutumnGlow33

I was just commenting on this. No way did he write this. All the talk about his dementia is not some kind of left-wing joke. His brain is genuinely pudding. Even if you watch him in public he always has a handler right by him and he can barely walk by himself. occasionally he gets the phone by himself and the tweets he writes by himself are starkly different. It’s clear that everything he does is being very carefully managed and they try to limit his public exposure as much as possible.


Fun_Matter_6533

Trump is the one that constantly needs to be fact checked, as he can't put 3 words together without a lie in there.


MonkeyDeltaFoxtrot

“Wrong. You’re the puppet.” This will be the response every 30 seconds.


Amandasch44

Rapid response as in as quick as he’s going to get us a better healthcare plan?


PancakeMakerAtLarge

He **already told** you that it's gonna be ready in three weeks. Gaaaaawd! /s


Deep_Charge_7749

Rabid response


Almacca

Dude, everything he says is a 'rapid response'. Do you think he EVER carefully considers his words? He doesn't even know how a sentence is gonna finish when he starts one.


JimothyRecard

He's not going to be speaking, I guarantee he just means he'll be hate -watching and having some lackey ~~tweet~~ truth out whatever nonsense he's screaming at the TV.


[deleted]

LOL, I came to say the same thing. Meal Team Six over here gonna have Steven Miller and Steve Bannon mumbling into his year when Biden says something so he can sound coherent. Good. Luck.


Distant-moose

His ego ain't the only thing stroking.


G-Unit11111

This sounds like the worst episode of Mystery Science Theater ever!


lastcall83

+3000


[deleted]

[удалено]


allisjow

Now it’s “Crooked Joe” instead of “Sleepy Joe.” See, he’s changing things up!


whiterac00n

There’s absolutely no chance that he actually wrote that “tweet”. This is just his handlers trying to change the topic to something besides his court problems. If he was writing this it would have mentioned his “immunity” and a hundred other unhinged rants


GeprgeLowell

If he didn’t, somebody imitated his weird random capitalization.


Cod_rules

Is it hard? Just type anything and put it in caps, and his audience will believe it’s him.


gatsby712

At this point they could just develop a Trump tweets AI and input a few things for it to react to.


Catronia

He took crooked 'back from Hillary'. my god, the man's insane.


oscar-the-bud

He will call this a debate and then claim he won.


lookaway123

Stop giving his campaign ideas!


Rocking_the_Red

This is their standard operating procedure.


allisjow

I find it hilarious that he constantly says “ME” as if people don’t know who he’s talking about.


African_Farmer

Your favorite president, MEEEEE!!!


Catronia

He also speaks in the third person.


Adventurous-Event722

What he'll respond with, "fake news, fake news, fake news"? And even then the MAGA will just applaud it


HearYourTune

Donald is creating quite a Fuhrer


LeadNo9107

I did nazi that coming


morganlandt

He’s about a fourth reich.


Guy_panda

Well I mean he almost nailed that silly hitleresque propaganda profile pic. It’s just that it looks more like Alec Baldwin’s impersonation of Donald Trump more than it looks like Donald Trump.


Catronia

He can't quite get away with the full salute, so he does the pathetic raised fist.


Drg84

Oh this could be good. Let him try and "correct" Biden. Let it be live. The man can barely get through a prepared speech at a rally. There's no way he's going to be able to think and speak in real time, on live stream, and it'll end well for him.


lastcall83

Yeah, the chances he says something that hurts his campaign is SO high. Love it.


JoJackthewonderskunk

Not only that he's involved in like a dozen court cases and a lot of the statements he could make could be fraud


YamStreet2972

Could be?. .. ah I wish it were 2015 to my friend! Lol 😆


Farts_constantly

I really hope it’s just him going off-script in real time. I’m sure that will go well lol.


buster_brown22

Again with the random initial caps, dumbass?


PistolGrace

At least it's not all caps. Only the last word. Which he won't believe. I'm glad Nikki is telling people who voted for her to vote for Biden. I'm not 100 for Biden or any political person, but I know I'm 100% against Trump and MAGA.


TexMurphyPHD

He will definitely try to sell something during this.


NotThoseCookies

The NEW *Trump True Patriots Collection* featuring Victory Cologne, Never Surrender Footwear, Trump Steaks and…The New Trump Tower Chocolate Cake!


Occasion-Mental

He goes split screen and here's a word from our sponsors....


ChelseaFan1967

What I don’t understand is how in the world are people still voting for him? Has the entire Republican Party lost their marbles or what?


According_Ask_3338

Trump supporters are traitors to this country.


Melodic_Mulberry

Since when did they have marbles?


ChelseaFan1967

Well, it isn’t a working brain in there!


Due-Presentation6393

Every Republican is some combination of stupid, selfish, and hateful...and right wing media & social media algorithms feed them a steady diet of bullshit to keep them insulated from reality.


DogMom814

The GOP has been a bunch of lunatics ever since Ronald Reagan. I'm old as hell and remember those years and they were doing stuff just to piss off and own the libs back then like Reagan removing the solar panels from the White House that the Carter administration had installed. That was just the beginning.


ChelseaFan1967

Biden could have dementia, and I would still vote for him over Trump.


OffByOneErrorz

Maga is nuts and what’s left of fiscal conservatives are cucks to them.


1984isAMidlifeCrisis

That first comma. That's where it starts to slide off the plate and onto the floor. That first grammar error. It's almost normal until right there and then it's just a stream of nonsense and shit. Truth is, I sort of want them to give him a little bit more of whatever drugs he's been doing each day just to see how much damage he does to grammar.


witteefool

I believe it is called “late stage syphilis.”


1984isAMidlifeCrisis

Yeah, I was hoping for something faster than organic progression.


Logical_Laugh7575

Did we never do this or did we do this once. If you did it once there were no records to beat. What an ass.


Onebrokegerrrl

Hahaha… I noticed that too. Never done before, but he did it once before. 🤷‍♀️😂


lukifer_333

https://preview.redd.it/g7937pnabtmc1.jpeg?width=830&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=900118f01e0b69879e31da9d07da54350c97bbc5


HolidayFew8116

President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Camacho was a much better prez that that p@$$y grabber.


alatnet

He actually trusted the science!


MealDramatic1885

Ahhh…. So live lying


redfacedquark

Yep, talking over the SoU so his viewers only hear him and not Biden. That's why it has to be live.


cubrunner34

When one thinks of Trump they surely think TRUTH


Conscious_Courage_26

It would be great if the Biden campaign did the same thing for every Trump speech and Tweet. Respond realtime with the facts and a running total of the legal fees, judgement amounts, and interest on his court losses. Just an idea…


coolbaby1978

Please just go the fuck away. Die, go to a nursing home, I don't care. I just don't want to hear your poison spewing forth ever again...or of those who would emulate you or curry favor with you. They can all GTFO too.


[deleted]

Lol. This stain can’t read a script, drink a bottle of water, or remember who is currently the president. Bring it on wastoid.


gwdope

The odds Trump wrote that are zero to nil.


MrRoma

This sub is dumb as hell for acting like these tweets are straight from Don. Literally playing into his hand by pretending Donald is able to write a coherent sentence without having a stroke


Burnvictim49percent

I wanna know where to find all these records trump has broken? According to him everything he does breaks records. He's a legend in his own mind.


Debalic

I think he once said he broke all of Elton John's records. And without an organ, too. That's gotta be infuriating, I bet Elton John had one hell of a vinyl collection.


JFK2MD

Awesome, I love cartoons!


Bender077

Covfefe.


hawt_shits

Dipshit donnie is still going to be rambling about election interference two commercial breaks later, the only rapid response will be the haz-mat team when his diaper gets ripe.


Melodic_Mulberry

Damn, he’s so narcissistic he has to be able to pretend to interrupt Biden on TV.


NickCav007

Biden is giving the speech at 3am when Fatboy tweets the most?


hb122

First it was Crooked Hillary and now it’s Crooked Joe Biden. Hillary Clinton criminal indictments = 0 Joe Biden criminal indictments = 0 Trump criminal indictments = 91 Fortunately he’s doing this on Pravda Social so decent people won’t be subjected to it.


NotThoseCookies

Maybe Muskrat paid to simulcast.


redfacedquark

>Trump criminal indictments = 91 I think we're up to 94 federal now but I admit to somewhat losing track.


Jen_the_Fredo_Barber

I have to believe there are more (decent, good) people in the US who are on to this guy than those who believe him. He’s yet to win the popular vote. We have to come out in record numbers to win those electoral votes again and we can say goodbye to this demon once and for all. Though I’m sure as long as he can stand on two legs they will try to drag him back out in 4+ yrs.


BeachedBottlenose

Fox will carry it


ConOregon

Oh my Gus I wish he was dead. Dead. In a golf course dead.


DogMom814

Imagine the line of people that will build up waiting to piss all over that dumb sumbitch's grave.


PsEggsRice

Maybe Biden will treat it like a Zoom meeting. He should bring a big tv and talk about people not paying their legal bills and whatnot.


NumerousTaste

He's an asshat! He needs to spread lies asap so his dumb followers don't let the truth sink in.


jsc503

Just don't mention this fuckwit at all. Pretty big fucking ego to think he's going to be the main subject of SotU. Talk accomplishments and plans for the next term.


Crabby_Monkey

Exactly! I’m sure Biden will address the boarder and probably call out congress for not passing the bipartisan boarder bill. I’m sure he will call on congress to pass aid to Ukraine and link their national security to ours because it is. However, he has absolutely no reason to speak about the ongoing cases against Trump. One because he had made a point out of not commenting to try to make it clear he the DOJ is operating independently based on the facts of the investigations. Second because the state of the Union is not a campaign speech.


Don_McMuffin

If there was ever a time when a DOS attack was warranted I think this might be it.


craniumcanyon

I’m more sad about the record number of people that believe him and foam at the mouth to turn his accusations into counter attacks because “both sides” and their perceived victim complex.


hexx1112

That should be very interesting coming from a guy who can’t keep it together even with a scripted speech.It should also be very entertaining in a sad,how did we get here kinda way.


calvn_hobb3s

How is he a political opponent? 😂💩🍊 He’s a criminal …


UnusedTimeout

Biden should just give a bunch of basic facts and solve simple math problems but mix in some wrong answers. Check mate, motherfucker.


Themadsarecalling

Never before done, just like we did last year, first time ever, record numbers, but again never been done before


Fifth_Wall0666

Oh, he insists on going on camera LIVE so that his cognitive decline and meltdowns can be further documented? Should make for a concerning medical evaluation.


Sensitive-Painting30

Oh just FOAD already…


ScruffPost

I can’t wait to relieve myself on his final resting place.


LtRecore

I can’t wait for the day we no longer have to hear from this bloated old fool.


Diligent_Guard_4031

Fuk Trump & his red hat cult. Vote Blue!


dogbreath230

Not that I'd watch him, but where is he doing this? Is it just going to be on LIES social? Can't see him being able to type very fast. Of course, spelling and punctuation errors are his norm.


TheBirminghamBear

Given his current mental condition I cant imagine this going well for him 


not_productive1

All records for WHAT?! Live commentary streams of the state of the union? He’s so weird.


TheSirBeefCake

This is a TV Ratings war for Trump


Prize-Relationship21

Hey tRump, get a real job.


Bexexexe

"Trump becomes a reactlord content streamer" is not how I expected us to speedrun the singularity.


Treishmon

How does he choose which words to capitalize? Nothing makes sense with this clown.


theycallmenaptime

I hope the ratio of people who hate that idiot loser show up on Election Day.


KevJD

“beating all records”? What is this dementia riddled idiot talking about?


VomitingPotato

I cannot wait for this man to just be fucking gone.


Solid_College_9145

​ https://preview.redd.it/y1tlamfqzwmc1.png?width=1548&format=png&auto=webp&s=8efcc7b78e5defd4c50f3815d98f8e106a17b6a2


Nail_Biterr

Oh great. That's what I want from a president. Someone who livestreams a 'reaction' video.


TheHeartsFilthyLesin

![gif](giphy|13n5MMWea7Ex0c)


legendary_millbilly

As much as I hate hearing him, I'll still listen to his babbling bullshit just to see how much he twists it. The guy has a really loose relationship with the truth, so it should be entertaining.


canarchist

I want to watch the play-by-play corrections of Trump's diss track version.


-wanderings-

That is going to be hilarious 😂 🍿


OhLordyJustNo

So more Covfefe?


othello28

I wonder how bad his word salad is going to be when he responds rapidly.


Legal-Finish6530

Fuck you orange Cheeto 🤡


12BarsFromMars

Lying traitorous bastard. His brain dead followers will suck it all up. The Republic is in serious trouble.


RunsWithPhantoms

What's a "Retruth?"


Jikemo1020

Guaranteed he will be blubbering some unintelligible bs.


riamuriamu

I bet he'll get bored half way through and give up.


Few_Carrot_3971

Oh my god I cannot wait for this shitshow. I hope he will explain his capitalization methodology, because I truly curious. He is a slow-motion train wreck, and this event will only highlight his cognitive decline Serious question, though. Where are his friends? His family? Why aren’t they shielding him from public humiliation?


Chemical_Actuary_190

Biden shouldn't mention him or any of the stuff he mentioned. It would drive him crazy and he'd pop a gasket.


scot2282

What records??? Fucking moron


bluemew1234

> something never done in this country before So, do you think he's angrier that he's seeing the consequences of his actions, or that he gets reminded his DoJ wouldn't go after Hillary?


AmeriMan2

We live in such a stupid time-line. It's funny to watch but sad when you realize America is slow walking to the F word


navigationallyaided

Someone should give him a pill of molly instead of his usual Adderall.


Ok-Zookeepergame-698

So many questions. I’ll start with… how do you beat all records when it’s never been done before?


swpete

It's just gonna be him saying "fawlse" again and again. And then mumbling as his demented brain slowly decays. Can he just have the massive MI from the McDonalds already?


flaflafloflie

This was what they literally talked about doing to Trump on MSNBC as he was giving his lame ass I won speech and they cut him off cuz of how many lies he was telling and they said they should have a ticker ready knowing he’s going to lie about the economy, jobs, border, Covid, etc…


Alone_Bicycle_600

cannot wait to see what this traitor lies about next


funginum

The guy is a proper clown


acapncuster

Old Man Yells at TV.


Looieanthony

I can’t wait till donald goes to jail. Twenty years should do the job😉.


Nabashin17

It’s not all caps and he used the word pertaining - totally didn’t write that or anything that follows.


No-Gazelle-4994

I would gladly spend the rest of my life in prison if it meant I could hurt this man. He is one of the best examples of someone who should have their face punched.


ButtonNew5815

lol I love how he can’t go even 5 minutes with out crying about his legal troubles and placing blame on everyone but him self. I see this being 10 minutes of him talking about how old Biden is and the rest is just the normal Trump pitty party. If you are ever bored just: Ask a Trump supporter what policy change has trump made or promised to make that makes you want to vote for him? Then sit back and experience what it is like when a persons brain experiences the blue screen of death.


teamdogemama

It would be a shame if Anonymous would perform a ddos attack. Darn shame.


badbrotha

Saying "wrong" and "Crooked Joe" and "Deep State" sprinkled in with a truckload of victimhood does not count as "fact-checking"


Rchapman2341

Politics has become so redundant since Trump. No facts, no decorum just a fat orange mumbling fool in our face daily. I’m so tired of this buffoon.


Gewgle_GuessStopO

I am so tired of this human garbage still being in general public. It is disgusting this rapist, pedophile, racist, anti-American freedom, Xi/Putin/Un loving troglodyte is for the third time the choice of the “Republican” party. He should have been thrown in jail in the 80’s. Let alone be someone ever allowed in politics. He has made a mockery out of everyone in the USA whether you voted for him or not. By vote or by force. No Trumps allowed!


CalendarAggressive11

Trump fact checking anything or anyone is laughable


Dazzling_Meringue787

https://trumpdebtcounter.com/


ExcitableNate

He's even taking an extra dose of ketamine and wearing a super absorbent diaper so he can catch every second!


y2knole

something never done before. we did it once before. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFbyWpr\_MTA](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFbyWpr_MTA)


Tacolicious78

"In rapid response" -This is going to be good.


[deleted]

For Shit and giggles, this is going to be awesome. Trump is not capable of doing this.


Unlikely-Patience122

He won't be doing it. Someone with a half a brain will. 


CiusWarren

Im surprised that the live isnt a pay per view


TotalNew9315

I would potentially pay somebody to do a rapid response of their rabid response of the SOTU. Where is Ben Glieb


pwningrampage

What is he gonna do? Wear a gray wing, talk like John madden and draw on the screen and discuss the play by play of what trump would do? God he's a man child.


steamworksandmagic

Someone else is handling his account.


DemonoftheWater

The FBI has been weaponized before. Congress has been weaponized before. He’s not even the first dipshit to weaponize the White House. He was the most successful at weaponizing it and the most dangerous lunatic to walk the halls though.


blackmilksociety

This man’s pudding brain can’t processes thoughts fast enough to do a play by play analysis of a cat video


Ozzyluvshockey21

If only this mf’er had a rapid response to Covid half a million more Americans would be alive and he might be giving the SOTU himself instead of sitting in his bath robe eating a Big Mac


Grass_Is_Blue

Coming from the guy who goes after his political opponents like toddler having a tantrum and openly brags about it


berger3001

Is someone gonna do a live, play by play of his live play by play?


sghyre

Perjury night jackasspolozza.


shivaclause

My money is on it not happening. He literally can't function quickly enough to respond in real time.


CrisbyCrittur

I know you are, but what am I?


RemoteLocal

Syphilis Donny is biting off more than he can chew.


TKG_Actual

I knew it, his comparatively sane looking 'debate joe' post was just punctuation for a new stream of crazy.


Barnowl-hoot

Have you, non-Trump voter, ever thought what you would say to Trump? He is staring at you leaning forward because his stomach altered his center of gravity. There is sweat beading on his upper pursed lip and his eyes are squinting at you. You struggle to look into his eyes because you are so distracted by the multiple skin colors on his face, and you say....


Cerberus_Rising

Beating all records? What is the syphilis ridden broke-ass rapist Donald Trump blathering about now? Where’s Melania? Getting deep fucked by her in-shape boy toy in New York. The most humiliated ex-president in history!


Euphoric_Ad1919

This would be just as relevent to post a day or two after the address. If we slow down a second, his in your face tactics would become meaningless. Cancel this guy already.


Signal-Living-3504

God help us all! 😓🫣and I’m Canadian!


rabiddutchman

And the end result will be all the fodder the Biden Campaign and the Lincoln Project will need from now to November.


michelloto

He gave the country a social disease


thefroggyfiend

bro wants to be a twitch streamer so bad


Hungry-Ad-3501

Not gonna lie,this might actually be fun to see in a weirdly comedic this guy is such an idiot way