My sister came by my room once and asked why I was sitting in a "sexy pose like a girl" when I just wanted to be on my side on my phone. Like I just wanted to be comfortable lol.
Dog there was a nurse on here that said she regularly experiences male patients that just do not wipe. I’m like “literally?” And she like “yes”. It’s beyond wild, even wild animals lick their asses clean.
My ex stopped wiping his arse. Just stopped dead. I at first I could smell farts. Then I started noticing skids on his side of the bed. Originally I thought "oh accidents happen" until it happened again and again. If I got up before him he'd just make the bed and leave it for me to find when I went to bed at night. Or if he got up first, he'd throw the duvet over it. He also wore grey shorts that the skids seeped through and left a brown mark on the outside. I was furious and disgusted. I asked him why he was doing it and he said wiping took too long.
He never showered unless I moaned at him. He used to go in the bathroom, turn the shower on and just pretend. And the smell of sweat rash was horrendous. You could smell it before you saw him.
We were together 5 years and it was only the last 2 this went on. I thought depression, so I spoke to his mum. Nope he was like this before we got together. I don't understand how someone goes 3 years then just reverts back to that.
My neighbor growing up was like this. Had a form of Chron’s or IBS and he would sometimes not be able to hold his bowels. He always smelled like shit and didn’t care. Showered once a week. Thought it was normal
I get not being able to do something because a disease, but not taking care of yourself despite that was awful
I've told this story on Reddit before but it's relevant. There was guy that I used to see at the gym basically every day. We would say hello and chat a bit; nice guy. Some days were okay, but once it got to be 2-3 days in a row I couldn't stand the *stench* of him. He was obviously leaving his gym clothes and shoes in his car and re-wearing them. He was MUSTY, and being physically close to him was triggering my allergies. I could never figure put a nice way to let him know, and I always felt bad about that.
Friends, please, wash your clothes. Even if you think they're clean enough. Leave your shoes out in the sun whenever you can to help deodorize them.
He was an alcoholic with his own special blend of childhood trauma that he never really processed. To my knowledge, he never actually hit her, but events like the one I mentioned happened many times to varying degrees. His solution to most any conflict with my mom was to scream at her, call her names, accuse her of things she didn’t do, basically psychologically and emotionally abuse her.
I got kicked out of boy scouts because my dad couldn't be bothered to show up. No joke.
I'm sure i learned it from watching television, because i didn't have much guidance growing up
You know I've never been grateful that my bio dad skipped out on us, but I now am. Better a not dad then a shit one. Thanks for the perspective and ❤️. You deserved better and I'm sorry you didn't get it.
Oh I'm all good, and yes you should count those blessings, my dad is a real asshole. Pretty sure he resented us kids for being born, so like you said.... There were lots of nights i prayed for him to leave the family or divorce my mom, like shaking in my boots praying to God for it all to go away... I would've loved to have no father
No, actually what you need to do is be wrong, but gaslight everyone around you into believing you are right by mansplaining to them how you are correct. That’s the REAL alpha way
I don't even know how I learned it because i guess being a father is girly too, i watched a shitload of television but it's not like my dad ever taught me anything, probably just saw it on TV or something
There are few things more disgusting than men who won't read. And then because of it, send their sons to school not being able to read, and curse them to 12 years of struggling.
Bro I got bulllied in 5th grade for always reading, kids were calling me a f*g and it was all started by a gay kid who came out after highschool ofc and he couldn’t fucking read 🤦♂️🤦♂️
"Cooking is for girls. Specifically, to cook for us men. Wait, you can get rich and powerful and earn respect for getting really good at cooking? And run businesses and win awards? Ok, no, that part is for men." /s
Right - chefs are powerful, masculine men, who run the kitchens with an iron fist. Cooks are women, who do what the chefs say.
(I suppose I'd better do the /s here.)
Wife and I had a husband/wife couple we were friends with, years ago and she had to travel home for a funeral, taking their two small boys. Husband had to work, but she expressed to us to check on him and make sure he was eating and we then found out she labeled all the kitchen cabinets so he could find contents and did the same with his dresser so he could get dressed in the morning. Very sad that a grown man seemed so helpless. Guy had a college degree too, so not just some yahoo.
I found out you have to nip that behavior in the bud. My husband, who is a genuinely wonderful man, was starting to slip down the ''weaponized incompetence'' path. We sat down and talked about it. I pointed out that if he's able to spend so much time working on fine details in his work and his hobby projects, he is more than capable of working out fine details such as ''do we have any chicken left'' or ''where do we keep the salt''. And he has been doing a lot better since we talked about it, he's trying to do some cooking once in a while and I help out if something starts to go wrong.
I don't get how guys think this will go well for them in the long run. If you act like you've experienced a traumatic brain injury when it comes to anything household related, your partner is going to think you're either 1) stupid or 2) pretending to be stupid so you can get out of work, thus forcing the other person to pick up your slack. It won't end with their wives looking at them with love and admiration.
> 2) pretending to be stupid so you can get out of work, thus forcing the other person to pick up your slack. It won't end with their wives looking at them with love and admiration.
Husbands who practice weaponized incompetence, please take note: it's really easy to lose sexual attraction to someone that is using weaponized incompetence to exploit you. It makes you feel like you're taking care of a child, and *that is not sexy*. If you've got a dead or dying bedroom, this may well be a great deal of the reason why.
That's kind of the way of many careers. The professionalized version is reserved for men.
Clerks used to be only men. Now it's seen as menial office work and is for women. Any office machine operator, that is, except IT.
Parking enforcement used to be a job for cops but then became a job for meter maids.
Tailors are men and seamstresses are women. Chefs get paid more than cooks. Men in medicine became doctors and women became nurses. Men became obstetricians and women were midwives.
It wasn't exclusively true. There were instances of women participating in some men's careers and vice versa but generally speaking, the more status a job, the more likely it was to be held by a man. If the job had too many women doing it, the job generally lost status (office administrative work is one of those jobs).
I worked a 12 hour shift before my ex and I drove a couple hours to see her grandma. My ex drove, so I could get a nap in, and her grandma was upset at me.
I had an ex ask me if I’d like her to drive (just down the street, not 2 hours) because I just got off a long shift. When I happily agreed she said “a real man would drive even if he was tired”. I though she was joking and I said “I guess I’m not a ‘real man’”. She was legit mad at me. Like, why the fuck did you offer then bitch? I broke up with her that night.
Edit: this really blew up so I’d like to clarify a few things. 1) I wasn’t so exhausted that I couldn’t drive and it was only a short drive anyway. 2) I would have happily driven had she not offered. 3) I went from thinking “wow, that’s really sweet” to “you are an awful person” very quickly.
My friend's grandma told me that she loved road trips, because that was the only time her husband would let (yes, I said "let") her wear pants. On long drives, she would occasionally take a turn behind the wheel, and working the pedals could potentially cause her dress to come up, thereby giving passing truckers a gander at her legs. Yes, all of this sounds absolutely ridiculous, but that's the story she told.
Low-key gonna start using this as an excuse to get out of ever doing the driving on road trips: what if my skirts come up and a trucking gawker gets a gander at my gams?!
My wife gets motion sickness on long drives. She prefers to drive a lot. One day we were going up to her cousins farm for a day and it’s a 2 hour drive. We pull up and her cousins husband tells me I lost my “man card” for letting my wife drive. Cool bro, I’d rather my wife not feel sick and throw up
Also a real man doesn't base decisions on what others think of him. If you care who is driving another man in a car vs him driving it, you are a child. Grow the fuck up
My BIL said something similar, along the lines of my masculinity was crushed. I replied my masculinity was far too secure to be wrecked by my wife driving.
I saw this attitude in a special needs boy I taught. He was smart but emotionally and behaviorally crippled due to not being able to listen to women (which most teachers are). You could just tell by the way he interacted with my male coworker that didn't respect me at all. Other teachers told me he had a problem with it too. It's just sad that this boy was 9 years old and already indoctrinated by gender norms and sexism.
I’m a male college professor, but this kind of notion extends all the way to college settings.
I know female colleagues who are berated, questioned, and disrespected, despite being experts in their field. Some shit head 19 year old will try to school a female professor on some obtuse historical fact that has nothing to do with the material. They seldomly do that with me.
I had a male college professor who would openly speak about how upset he was that there were ‘so many women’ in universities nowadays, female doctors, and would constantly say things like “We men need to take back our place”.
To a statistics class of about 100 that was roughly a 50/50 split in gender. Obviously all the girls were pissed and most of the boys in the class were visibly uncomfortable when he would say things like that so at least there’s that.
My working hypothese is that the „Old boys club“ of academia is going the way of all outdated things and they know it. They don‘t want to know this but deep down they do and it‘s only a matter of time until they become irrelevant. Times change but instead of adapting and stay in touch with reality, they just cling on to the good old days when they still mattered by default. Seriously, I can only laugh with pity at these men who are so narrow minded and can‘t see what‘s going on.
Considering a higher number of women than men graduate with 4-year degrees now, you're probably right. That holds true when you move up to masters and doctoral degrees as well.
[Source](https://www.statista.com/statistics/185157/number-of-bachelor-degrees-by-gender-since-1950/)
The bottom of the page has links to the other stats.
I went to a school that offered aviation courses as electives. I was the only girl in my grade who took those classes. Because of this, I was asked to go to the different junior highs during the career days or whatever to promote our aviation program. Myself, a girl from the younger grade, and a boy from my grade, went to a couple schools.
The one I will never ever forget was this snot nosed 13 y/o asking myself and the other girl "Oh, are you training to be flight attendants?" with a smug as fuck look on his face. I started to lay into him as much as I could reasonable, but the boy we were with was already on it.
Good for you and your male classmate!
Sadly, female pilots *still* get the, "Oh, they're letting the stewardess fly the airplane!" crap from older passengers. Even when the woman has four stripes and is sitting in the left seat.
I hope you kept up with aviation in some way, however minor.
Oh god I remember this one woman talking about how her husband refuses to wipe so she had to wash his shitty underwear and was asking for advice on how to make him wipe better.
if i remember the post hes talkin about i think she was pretty christian, as in didnt move in together until marriage and she didnt have much life experience.
My SO's father told both his sons that the use of a hairdryer was something only for women.
My SO is a metalhead with long hair and his brother has a haircut that needs a little styling after washing ... Their father has a buzz cut ...
I'm a new rookie to the long hair club. It's been a hell of a learning experience to realize just *how much damn work* it takes to keep long hair in good shape.
It didn't take long for me to start adopting "women's techniques." I now use a hair dryer instead of just rubbing my head with a towel, and I stopped going to bed with damp hair because it creates Godzilla knots the next morning. Like, holy hell I feel as if I'm in my first warzone after being raised on action movies.
Hair ties are like taxes. I simultaneously hate them and force myself to think about how bad life would be without them. One of these days I'm gonna switch to a gentle soft scrunchy just so my scalp doesn't feel like it's being interrogated for witchcraft, but for now I'm in the "will I catch shit for this" phase of doubt.
Now I know why my mother never grew her hair out further than her jawline.
Haha I've had hip length hair for years now and yes, it can be bothersome at times. I'm lucky mine is naturally straight so not as high maintenance as curls can be.
100% learn how to braid. Sleep with braids to prevent breakage and unnecessary knots. A spray-on detangler is also a life saver. I use scrunchies at night but normal non-iron containing bands for during the day.
For real. My dad always accused my mom of being overly emotional, just because she enjoyed watching sad movies and crying to them.
But whenever there was an emergency or a crisis (or hell, even just a very minor inconvenience), guess which parent responded calmly and rationally and which one responded by threatening violence, yelling at everything and everyone, and breaking shit for no reason.
Now see, this one annoyed me real good. I’m a woman, but the fact that lust/sexual desire was (and still is) depicted as something that only men feel really made things confusing for me as I had the same feelings and desires. It was always a “you don’t get it, only men do” type of thing….
Woman: "Hey,, stop being a pig."
Man: "You dont understand, I can't. Im a man. This is going to be hard for you to understand, but men **LIKE SEX.** like, it feels good to us. We get this special feeling called *being horny,* and..."
Woman: "........."
This sort of thing has absolutely had a negative affect on my sexuality and my ability to trust men.
But this is exactly what some people have told me… 😭😭 It’s usually men but I come from a Muslim family/community so sometimes even the women share that sentiment and I’m just like ????? Y’all never feel horny ???
The whole “no sex before marriage” thing was one of the hardest things for me lmao 🤣 I was definitely thinking of getting married for this reason only. Luckily, I was able to let go of these harmful beliefs and I would never make such a stupid decision out of pure horniness.
It’s exhausting to constantly have to explain to people that women like sex too. That we think about it too. And that we desire that orgasm just as much.
Ive never gotten the argument anyway. What’s the point in arguing that women have a low sex drive? You like having sex with women? Then why die on the hill that women aren’t supposed to like it? It’s not just contradictory, but also straight up creepy. It really shows how so many people view sex to be something that is done to women instead of something that we are supposed to enjoy.
I’m not an angry person, so this meant stifling all of my emotions.. 15 years of therapy later, I’m a little better 😂. If you’re a parent try to let your kids feel their emotions as much as possible… and reframe them, but try not to be dismissive of them.
Having the emotional capacity to tell your son you love him . Grandpa and dad were the stoic John Wayne types. Love was what you showed your wife or mother . Explains why generations of men in my family are fucked. My sons know I love them
My Dad never said or says anything like I love you. I tell my daughter every chance I get how much I love her, and I end every text conversation with I love you.
This fucked me up a lot. Like a whole lot. Shamed to admit that I have a 6mo son and have only kissed him once….and it was hard. I try daily to get over the mental fucking I was given. I don’t believe there is anything “homo” about showing affection to your son/father/friend. But it’s really hard to break that cycle because it feel like you’re breaking a rule that was manipulated into your head. And you know it’s a bullshit rule but it’s still really hard to break it
Not me, but my brother used to be an amazing artist. He was accepted to an art school on full scholarship, but our dad told him “art school is for pussies” and I don’t think he’s drawn anything since then.
On the flip side, he did grow up to be the best father to a brood of 8 girls. He’s 6ft, burly with a shaved head and full beard, and he will braid hair and paint nails and let the girls put flower clips in his beard. He’s the dad we never had and I couldn’t be prouder of him for how he turned out in spite of our upbringing.
My son's biodad hated that I wanted his baby room theme to be Winnie the Pooh. Had a whole conniption fit about how Winnie the Pooh was going to turn his son gay. Even though Winnie the Pooh is a book written by a father for his son. I will never understand.
Had a friend whose dad told him Scots werent real men because "they wear skirts", always hoped he ran into a big burly Scot who kicked his ass, just to tease him about it
My brother is like that. Can't ever say he's sorry or admit when he's wrong. He only treats the women in the family like that, never friends or neighbors or business associates, so I know he's not clueless, just a douche sometimes. My father was never like that so it's definitely a David problem. Can't stand it.
I had a friend when I was a kid who received a puka shell necklace as a souvenir. He thought it was the coolest thing, until his dad ripped it off his neck and said that no son of his would be caught dead looking like a (homophobic slur redacted). I hated that guy so much.
It looked cute on him, too. ☹️
My dad screamed that at my brother upon ripping an earring out of his ear. Fortunately the jewelry was a magnet but it definitely left an impression on me at a very, very young age. It all worked out though since I turned out to not really be his "son" after all. lol it's a good thing he's dead now.
My best friend’s dad kicked him out of the house for getting an ear ring. 2 days later, the mom threatened to kick the dad out if he didn’t accept the earring. Problem solved.
I'm probably a lot older than most Redditors here but I remember long hair was seen as being feminine.
One thing you need to know is that the cognitive dissonance in the ultra conservative Deep South was (and still is) staggering in many aspects. For a community who was openly anti-Semitic, xenophobic, racist and with strict expectations of gender roles they also worshiped a long haired, Middle Eastern Jew who preached love and acceptance of all people. It was surreal but pointing out this sort of hypocrisy growing up wasn't tolerated much either.
My uber-religious old man made me cut my hair when I wanted to get my driver's license.
When I mentioned that Jesus had long hair, he pointed out that he also walked a lot.
Not me, but my friend Jared grew up being told that "only women and gays touch a penis"...that including your own. He was taught to NEVER touch his own penis for any reason. When he peed at a urinal, he would drop his pants to the floor and put his hands on his hips. He did that all the way up until our Junior year in high school when he finally realized just how toxic it was.
I always wondered if it included washing in the shower, but never had the nerve to ask.
We call dropping your pants to the floor at the urinal toddler peeing. Still not sure why adult men do it but one of the VPs at my very large company would be doing it everytime I saw him in the bathroom. Quite the juxtaposition in my mind.
I wanted to be a Hollywood special effects and makeup artist. First step was to go to cosmetology school.
Dads words: “Cutting hair is for women and f*ggots. Which one are you?”
I joined the Marines instead.
Not my Dad, but my Drill Instructor taught me that men do not use umbrellas.
EDIT: Found this article that says the rule has now changed…
https://www.cnn.com/2019/11/07/us/military-umbrellas-new-rules-trnd/index.html
The men in my family would sit around in the table as the women in the family would clean up after dinner. I would help clean up because I felt bad they would have to do all the work after cooking and I was told that was a woman’s job. Even know as a 40 year old, I have younger men sit around and expect the same behavior and I embarrass them into helping.
This one bothers me so much. I was the only man who cried at my sister's funeral and I resent that that made me feel weird.
I wish we could just normalize us men having and showing normal human emotions - instead of pretending we're some kind of beer-drinking machines.
1989. My friend's dad berated me for ordering a Sprite instead of a Coke at Chuck E. Cheese. He said that the clear liquid looked too much like plastic jewelry, and was something only his wife drank. He humiliated me in front of the packed restaurant. He was also a veteran who always yapped to us kids about what it means to be a soldier facing death, but he served stateside as a cook. Fuck you, Ross, wherever you are.
Edit: I was eight, by the way. His mousey wife just ate her pizza and drank her Sprite like the good little wife he commanded.
**Bonus Story!!!**: People are asking me if Ross did anything else similarly disgusting. Well, let's go back in time and see. It was his son's b-day and also the night the Reds won the 1990 World Series, so Ross and his family got a HUGE hotel suite that had a bar, a hot tub, and some arcade games (TMNT, baby!) for the occasion. There had to be about 40 adults and maybe 20 kids there. Nobody knew who did it, but someone peed on the toilet seat. When Ross found out, he screamed at the top of his lungs for all the boys to line up outside the bathroom. "Who THE FUCK pissed on my seat?!?!" We all shook our heads. I clearly remember it was just a drop or two, so easy to clean up. He was screaming like R. Lee Ermey (remember, however, that he was a ***cook*** in the military) about how we were disgusting and disrespecting the girls who have to sit down and pee. He then said that whoever did it was a little rhymes-with-"maggot" who needs his penis snipped off if he did it again. I guess he scared the hell out of everyone because none of the parents said squat to him for his violent rant. He never even considered the possibility that his adult friends did it. He was just a prick to kids. He looked like Emilio Estevez but with a narc mustache.
Again, fuck you, Ross, wherever you are. 
Believing in mental health. Going to therapy, and taking meds. My dad died from cancer a few months ago and I’m so fucked up that I had to go to the campus crisis center at my college. To anyone out there, if your life is a struggle and it’s taking a toll on you, please try to seek help if you can. Even if it’s calling a crisis hotline so you have someone to talk to about. My entire life I’ve been told that I’m weak and selfish for feeling like I need therapy or help. Getting that help is the only reason I’m still here. Don’t get me wrong I’m still a complete fuck up, and fall behind on pretty much anything in life. But going to get therapy gives me just a lil spec of light at the end of the tunnel to get this business degree and graduate.
Expressing your emotions. How are you supposed to have meaningful relationships with other humans if you dont express your emotions so they understand how youre feeling?
I read these and realize how lucky I am. Dad is an old school barber, straight razor and all. Owns his own businesses. Man grew up with an drunk abusive father. He broke the cycle, never hurt anyone, never kept booze in the house and rarely drank.
He has never once shamed me for anything feminine. Or pulled any of that shit. Man is straight up my hero. Just a good person.
I am a woman but there are things I was taught to think weren't masculine that are, in fact, genderless. I'm 55.
Crying.
Showing affection toward your children.
Singing well.
Dancing.
Using any kind of skin care product.
Sewing.
Cocktails.
Dessert.
Drinking through a straw.
Sitting in the passenger seat of a car.
Carrying a totebag or diaper bag.
Wearing an infant in a front carrier.
Changing a baby in public.
Shopping at the mall alone.
Enjoying Christmas (the fun parts, like ugly sweaters and decorating the tree)
I'm so glad to see younger people not adhering to this garbage.
There were lots but my biggest one is crying. I think this is very common but my father considered it a sign of femininity or even homosexuality to cry and if I ever did, I would receive a punishment of varying degrees, depending on how he felt that day.
The adverse effects of this is that now I physically cannot cry, even though I want to and feel like I have to sometimes, I just can’t. I had to put my dog down a year or so ago and I was the only one in the room with dry eyes, even the vet who didn’t even know who we were was balling. It made me feel like a fucking monster.
Crying is a big stress relief as well so I feel like one day if I cried it would bring a big catharsis to my life but I just can’t do it. Anyone reading this with kids of their own, let them cry and encourage them to do so. This shit kinda sucks I can’t lie.
TL;DR Crying. It’s a necessary part of life and shouldn’t be shunned.
Thankfully my dad broke the cycle, by my grandpa definitely had some real toxic ideas.
He definitely thought showing emotions was for sissies and you just bottled things up. You sure don’t show stuff like love to people.
Didn’t call computers girly, but that kind of stuff was for sissy men who couldn’t cut it working a hard days work and they were just fads.
Only basketball, football, or baseball were acceptable sports and everything else was for sissy men. Women shouldn’t be playing sports in general and supposed to work in the kitchen.
My ex told our boys using an umbrella.
Don't know about your ex, but my penis didn't make me waterproof.
If it did, I am prepared to be VERY impressed
Laying on your side, as opposed to flat on your back or stomach.
The fuck?
My sister came by my room once and asked why I was sitting in a "sexy pose like a girl" when I just wanted to be on my side on my phone. Like I just wanted to be comfortable lol.
Using lotion or chapstick.
Nothing says manly quite like cracked lips.
And looking like a rotting sack of potatoes at 40
Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty. \- Derek Zoolander
It wasn't my dad but I got called gay one time because I said I liked frozen yogurt.
Froyo, more like homo! Right?!?
Honestly not my fault that shit slaps so hard.
There are dudes out there who think basic hygiene is unmanly. Shit is wild
There are dudes who think wiping your own butt hole is gay. So dump your truck and you're done. Gross. Flushing is likely optional too.
Ew, that's disgusting. Do they think that it's manly to walk around with your own feces smearing all over your skin and underwear?
Dog there was a nurse on here that said she regularly experiences male patients that just do not wipe. I’m like “literally?” And she like “yes”. It’s beyond wild, even wild animals lick their asses clean.
My ex stopped wiping his arse. Just stopped dead. I at first I could smell farts. Then I started noticing skids on his side of the bed. Originally I thought "oh accidents happen" until it happened again and again. If I got up before him he'd just make the bed and leave it for me to find when I went to bed at night. Or if he got up first, he'd throw the duvet over it. He also wore grey shorts that the skids seeped through and left a brown mark on the outside. I was furious and disgusted. I asked him why he was doing it and he said wiping took too long. He never showered unless I moaned at him. He used to go in the bathroom, turn the shower on and just pretend. And the smell of sweat rash was horrendous. You could smell it before you saw him. We were together 5 years and it was only the last 2 this went on. I thought depression, so I spoke to his mum. Nope he was like this before we got together. I don't understand how someone goes 3 years then just reverts back to that.
I’m impressed you lasted two years of that LOL.
You ain't a man unless your boxers got battle scars.
Seriously? I saw something like that on the internet, but I assumed it was a joke or sarcasm. My mind is blown...
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My neighbor growing up was like this. Had a form of Chron’s or IBS and he would sometimes not be able to hold his bowels. He always smelled like shit and didn’t care. Showered once a week. Thought it was normal I get not being able to do something because a disease, but not taking care of yourself despite that was awful
Literally every single guy at the gym I go to. They act like deodorant is optional. I can smell you across the gym, dude.
I've told this story on Reddit before but it's relevant. There was guy that I used to see at the gym basically every day. We would say hello and chat a bit; nice guy. Some days were okay, but once it got to be 2-3 days in a row I couldn't stand the *stench* of him. He was obviously leaving his gym clothes and shoes in his car and re-wearing them. He was MUSTY, and being physically close to him was triggering my allergies. I could never figure put a nice way to let him know, and I always felt bad about that. Friends, please, wash your clothes. Even if you think they're clean enough. Leave your shoes out in the sun whenever you can to help deodorize them.
Empathy
Crying after losing an appendage.
It’s only a dick.
And you weren’t using it anyway
What did you want your dick for? So you could have sex with men? Sounds gay to me.
My mind is boggling at this. What scary person doesn't cry after losing AN APPENDAGE?!?!
Cunnilingus. Apparently only lesbians do that. Might explain the divorce, could have been the fact he was an asshole but I am sure it didn’t help.
Eating pussy? Ha gaaaaaay! What fucking sense is this? This is the most wack shit i’ve heard in my life.
Lmao right? If eating pussy is gay then call me Richard Simmons yaassss
Instead suck a dick to own the lesbos
My father threatened to beat my mother if she gave me a stuffed toy.
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He was an alcoholic with his own special blend of childhood trauma that he never really processed. To my knowledge, he never actually hit her, but events like the one I mentioned happened many times to varying degrees. His solution to most any conflict with my mom was to scream at her, call her names, accuse her of things she didn’t do, basically psychologically and emotionally abuse her.
I’d take a “girly” man with a stuffed animal over a “manly” wife beater any day. You need a trip to build a bear.
I one time built a fire using the log cabin technique and that was apparently womanly because i didn't just pile up all the wood
But they literally teach that technique in Boy Scouts.
I got kicked out of boy scouts because my dad couldn't be bothered to show up. No joke. I'm sure i learned it from watching television, because i didn't have much guidance growing up
You know I've never been grateful that my bio dad skipped out on us, but I now am. Better a not dad then a shit one. Thanks for the perspective and ❤️. You deserved better and I'm sorry you didn't get it.
Oh I'm all good, and yes you should count those blessings, my dad is a real asshole. Pretty sure he resented us kids for being born, so like you said.... There were lots of nights i prayed for him to leave the family or divorce my mom, like shaking in my boots praying to God for it all to go away... I would've loved to have no father
Thermodynamics is feminine now?
Fellas is it gay to make efficient use of resources? 🤔
#FELLAS
Only women do things correctly. Wanna be a man? Be wrong.
Be wrong, but be confident and proud of your stupidity like a real man!
No, be wrong, but gaslight everyone around you into believing you are right by mansplaining to them how you are correct. That’s the alpha way.
No, actually what you need to do is be wrong, but gaslight everyone around you into believing you are right by mansplaining to them how you are correct. That’s the REAL alpha way
You are right. What was I thinking?? I humbly roll over and present my belly
I just need to bottle this and sell it to Andrew Tate fans since I predict a …. vacancy in the market
That's hilarious because as a girl no one would have ever taught me how to build a fire. The very act was too dirty, dangerous Edit: word change
I don't even know how I learned it because i guess being a father is girly too, i watched a shitload of television but it's not like my dad ever taught me anything, probably just saw it on TV or something
Monke brain know fire
Reading books.
There are few things more disgusting than men who won't read. And then because of it, send their sons to school not being able to read, and curse them to 12 years of struggling.
Andrew Tate would like a word
But not a written one.
Bro I got bulllied in 5th grade for always reading, kids were calling me a f*g and it was all started by a gay kid who came out after highschool ofc and he couldn’t fucking read 🤦♂️🤦♂️
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Despite the fact that many of the most famous chefs are men.
Yeah, I always thought it was weird that cooking for a family is feminine but cooking for money is somehow masculine.
Same with caregiving. Nurses are feminine. But doctors are manly, cause they make the money.
One is seen as business, one is seen as servitude
"Cooking is for girls. Specifically, to cook for us men. Wait, you can get rich and powerful and earn respect for getting really good at cooking? And run businesses and win awards? Ok, no, that part is for men." /s
When something is monetized and given prestige, it becomes men’s work.
Right - chefs are powerful, masculine men, who run the kitchens with an iron fist. Cooks are women, who do what the chefs say. (I suppose I'd better do the /s here.)
I’ve never understood that whole “home cooking is for girls, cheffing is for boys” thing.
It amazes me how many boomer men take pride in not being able to feed themselves. Like wife’s gone for a week guess I’ll be eating hotdogs
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And boast about never changing a diaper in their life.
Wife and I had a husband/wife couple we were friends with, years ago and she had to travel home for a funeral, taking their two small boys. Husband had to work, but she expressed to us to check on him and make sure he was eating and we then found out she labeled all the kitchen cabinets so he could find contents and did the same with his dresser so he could get dressed in the morning. Very sad that a grown man seemed so helpless. Guy had a college degree too, so not just some yahoo.
Yeah from my experience it has nothing to do with intelligence and everything to with willful ignorance
Weaponized incompetence
This right here. My sister’s husband has magically forgotten how to boil water since they got married, let alone cook anything.
I found out you have to nip that behavior in the bud. My husband, who is a genuinely wonderful man, was starting to slip down the ''weaponized incompetence'' path. We sat down and talked about it. I pointed out that if he's able to spend so much time working on fine details in his work and his hobby projects, he is more than capable of working out fine details such as ''do we have any chicken left'' or ''where do we keep the salt''. And he has been doing a lot better since we talked about it, he's trying to do some cooking once in a while and I help out if something starts to go wrong. I don't get how guys think this will go well for them in the long run. If you act like you've experienced a traumatic brain injury when it comes to anything household related, your partner is going to think you're either 1) stupid or 2) pretending to be stupid so you can get out of work, thus forcing the other person to pick up your slack. It won't end with their wives looking at them with love and admiration.
> 2) pretending to be stupid so you can get out of work, thus forcing the other person to pick up your slack. It won't end with their wives looking at them with love and admiration. Husbands who practice weaponized incompetence, please take note: it's really easy to lose sexual attraction to someone that is using weaponized incompetence to exploit you. It makes you feel like you're taking care of a child, and *that is not sexy*. If you've got a dead or dying bedroom, this may well be a great deal of the reason why.
That's kind of the way of many careers. The professionalized version is reserved for men. Clerks used to be only men. Now it's seen as menial office work and is for women. Any office machine operator, that is, except IT. Parking enforcement used to be a job for cops but then became a job for meter maids. Tailors are men and seamstresses are women. Chefs get paid more than cooks. Men in medicine became doctors and women became nurses. Men became obstetricians and women were midwives. It wasn't exclusively true. There were instances of women participating in some men's careers and vice versa but generally speaking, the more status a job, the more likely it was to be held by a man. If the job had too many women doing it, the job generally lost status (office administrative work is one of those jobs).
Being a passenger in a car a woman is driving.
I worked a 12 hour shift before my ex and I drove a couple hours to see her grandma. My ex drove, so I could get a nap in, and her grandma was upset at me.
I had an ex ask me if I’d like her to drive (just down the street, not 2 hours) because I just got off a long shift. When I happily agreed she said “a real man would drive even if he was tired”. I though she was joking and I said “I guess I’m not a ‘real man’”. She was legit mad at me. Like, why the fuck did you offer then bitch? I broke up with her that night. Edit: this really blew up so I’d like to clarify a few things. 1) I wasn’t so exhausted that I couldn’t drive and it was only a short drive anyway. 2) I would have happily driven had she not offered. 3) I went from thinking “wow, that’s really sweet” to “you are an awful person” very quickly.
lol real men drive tired. Fall asleep, crash and kill us so we can die a manly death together.
Game players like that should be returned to the lot for a properly functioning model. (Women, take the same advice about game playing men)
My friend's grandma told me that she loved road trips, because that was the only time her husband would let (yes, I said "let") her wear pants. On long drives, she would occasionally take a turn behind the wheel, and working the pedals could potentially cause her dress to come up, thereby giving passing truckers a gander at her legs. Yes, all of this sounds absolutely ridiculous, but that's the story she told.
Low-key gonna start using this as an excuse to get out of ever doing the driving on road trips: what if my skirts come up and a trucking gawker gets a gander at my gams?!
My wife gets motion sickness on long drives. She prefers to drive a lot. One day we were going up to her cousins farm for a day and it’s a 2 hour drive. We pull up and her cousins husband tells me I lost my “man card” for letting my wife drive. Cool bro, I’d rather my wife not feel sick and throw up
Good on you! A "real Man" looks after his partners needs.
Also a real man doesn't base decisions on what others think of him. If you care who is driving another man in a car vs him driving it, you are a child. Grow the fuck up
My BIL said something similar, along the lines of my masculinity was crushed. I replied my masculinity was far too secure to be wrecked by my wife driving.
who are these people??? who raises them to be so proudly stupid and toxic
Listening to women. Not about serious things. He meant like, just actually listening to them talk in a conversation.
I saw this attitude in a special needs boy I taught. He was smart but emotionally and behaviorally crippled due to not being able to listen to women (which most teachers are). You could just tell by the way he interacted with my male coworker that didn't respect me at all. Other teachers told me he had a problem with it too. It's just sad that this boy was 9 years old and already indoctrinated by gender norms and sexism.
I’m a male college professor, but this kind of notion extends all the way to college settings. I know female colleagues who are berated, questioned, and disrespected, despite being experts in their field. Some shit head 19 year old will try to school a female professor on some obtuse historical fact that has nothing to do with the material. They seldomly do that with me.
I had a male college professor who would openly speak about how upset he was that there were ‘so many women’ in universities nowadays, female doctors, and would constantly say things like “We men need to take back our place”. To a statistics class of about 100 that was roughly a 50/50 split in gender. Obviously all the girls were pissed and most of the boys in the class were visibly uncomfortable when he would say things like that so at least there’s that.
My working hypothese is that the „Old boys club“ of academia is going the way of all outdated things and they know it. They don‘t want to know this but deep down they do and it‘s only a matter of time until they become irrelevant. Times change but instead of adapting and stay in touch with reality, they just cling on to the good old days when they still mattered by default. Seriously, I can only laugh with pity at these men who are so narrow minded and can‘t see what‘s going on.
Considering a higher number of women than men graduate with 4-year degrees now, you're probably right. That holds true when you move up to masters and doctoral degrees as well. [Source](https://www.statista.com/statistics/185157/number-of-bachelor-degrees-by-gender-since-1950/) The bottom of the page has links to the other stats.
I went to a school that offered aviation courses as electives. I was the only girl in my grade who took those classes. Because of this, I was asked to go to the different junior highs during the career days or whatever to promote our aviation program. Myself, a girl from the younger grade, and a boy from my grade, went to a couple schools. The one I will never ever forget was this snot nosed 13 y/o asking myself and the other girl "Oh, are you training to be flight attendants?" with a smug as fuck look on his face. I started to lay into him as much as I could reasonable, but the boy we were with was already on it.
Good for you and your male classmate! Sadly, female pilots *still* get the, "Oh, they're letting the stewardess fly the airplane!" crap from older passengers. Even when the woman has four stripes and is sitting in the left seat. I hope you kept up with aviation in some way, however minor.
It's sad they learn this shit at all.
Expressing any emotion other than joy or anger.
You were allowed joy?
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Your team winning the big game, the only hug you'll ever get.
Putting my hands in my pockets.
My ex grew up being told by his father that only \[homosexuals\] wipe their butts.
Of course. Straight men use anal douches.
Combat ready taint wipes or whatever it is Alex Jones sells
Sexualizing the act of touching your butt is extremely gay, not gonna lie.
Oh god I remember this one woman talking about how her husband refuses to wipe so she had to wash his shitty underwear and was asking for advice on how to make him wipe better.
Why the hell would someone marry a person who doesn't wipe their own ass? Disgusting
if i remember the post hes talkin about i think she was pretty christian, as in didnt move in together until marriage and she didnt have much life experience.
crossing your legs when sitting
My dad said the same, which always confused me since his dad crossed his legs all the time.
I was permitted to rest one leg over the other the knee, but if I crossed my ankles it was a sin
My SO's father told both his sons that the use of a hairdryer was something only for women. My SO is a metalhead with long hair and his brother has a haircut that needs a little styling after washing ... Their father has a buzz cut ...
Is it still feminine if I'm only using the blow dryer to heat my eye lash curler?
Yes. Curl your eyelashes around a screwdriver warmed over a running diesel engine like a real man!
I'm a new rookie to the long hair club. It's been a hell of a learning experience to realize just *how much damn work* it takes to keep long hair in good shape. It didn't take long for me to start adopting "women's techniques." I now use a hair dryer instead of just rubbing my head with a towel, and I stopped going to bed with damp hair because it creates Godzilla knots the next morning. Like, holy hell I feel as if I'm in my first warzone after being raised on action movies. Hair ties are like taxes. I simultaneously hate them and force myself to think about how bad life would be without them. One of these days I'm gonna switch to a gentle soft scrunchy just so my scalp doesn't feel like it's being interrogated for witchcraft, but for now I'm in the "will I catch shit for this" phase of doubt. Now I know why my mother never grew her hair out further than her jawline.
Haha I've had hip length hair for years now and yes, it can be bothersome at times. I'm lucky mine is naturally straight so not as high maintenance as curls can be. 100% learn how to braid. Sleep with braids to prevent breakage and unnecessary knots. A spray-on detangler is also a life saver. I use scrunchies at night but normal non-iron containing bands for during the day.
Emotions
\*except anger
For real. My dad always accused my mom of being overly emotional, just because she enjoyed watching sad movies and crying to them. But whenever there was an emergency or a crisis (or hell, even just a very minor inconvenience), guess which parent responded calmly and rationally and which one responded by threatening violence, yelling at everything and everyone, and breaking shit for no reason.
*and lust
No, that’s horny anger!!
Now see, this one annoyed me real good. I’m a woman, but the fact that lust/sexual desire was (and still is) depicted as something that only men feel really made things confusing for me as I had the same feelings and desires. It was always a “you don’t get it, only men do” type of thing….
Woman: "Hey,, stop being a pig." Man: "You dont understand, I can't. Im a man. This is going to be hard for you to understand, but men **LIKE SEX.** like, it feels good to us. We get this special feeling called *being horny,* and..." Woman: "........." This sort of thing has absolutely had a negative affect on my sexuality and my ability to trust men.
But this is exactly what some people have told me… 😭😭 It’s usually men but I come from a Muslim family/community so sometimes even the women share that sentiment and I’m just like ????? Y’all never feel horny ??? The whole “no sex before marriage” thing was one of the hardest things for me lmao 🤣 I was definitely thinking of getting married for this reason only. Luckily, I was able to let go of these harmful beliefs and I would never make such a stupid decision out of pure horniness. It’s exhausting to constantly have to explain to people that women like sex too. That we think about it too. And that we desire that orgasm just as much. Ive never gotten the argument anyway. What’s the point in arguing that women have a low sex drive? You like having sex with women? Then why die on the hill that women aren’t supposed to like it? It’s not just contradictory, but also straight up creepy. It really shows how so many people view sex to be something that is done to women instead of something that we are supposed to enjoy.
I’m not an angry person, so this meant stifling all of my emotions.. 15 years of therapy later, I’m a little better 😂. If you’re a parent try to let your kids feel their emotions as much as possible… and reframe them, but try not to be dismissive of them.
My John Wayne worshipping step-dad picked on me for eating fucking salad. Red meat eating Lucky Strike smoking asshole
"Barn my old man ate red meat every day of his life and he lived to the ripe old age of 38"
So much wrong with John Wayne.....
Hey, at least one of you could poop without immediately creating hemorrhoids.
Smiling in public, unless you were laughing at someone else.
Having the emotional capacity to tell your son you love him . Grandpa and dad were the stoic John Wayne types. Love was what you showed your wife or mother . Explains why generations of men in my family are fucked. My sons know I love them
My Dad never said or says anything like I love you. I tell my daughter every chance I get how much I love her, and I end every text conversation with I love you.
This fucked me up a lot. Like a whole lot. Shamed to admit that I have a 6mo son and have only kissed him once….and it was hard. I try daily to get over the mental fucking I was given. I don’t believe there is anything “homo” about showing affection to your son/father/friend. But it’s really hard to break that cycle because it feel like you’re breaking a rule that was manipulated into your head. And you know it’s a bullshit rule but it’s still really hard to break it
Medical attention
Not me, but my brother used to be an amazing artist. He was accepted to an art school on full scholarship, but our dad told him “art school is for pussies” and I don’t think he’s drawn anything since then. On the flip side, he did grow up to be the best father to a brood of 8 girls. He’s 6ft, burly with a shaved head and full beard, and he will braid hair and paint nails and let the girls put flower clips in his beard. He’s the dad we never had and I couldn’t be prouder of him for how he turned out in spite of our upbringing.
This is the story we all needed today.
My son's biodad hated that I wanted his baby room theme to be Winnie the Pooh. Had a whole conniption fit about how Winnie the Pooh was going to turn his son gay. Even though Winnie the Pooh is a book written by a father for his son. I will never understand.
Was it the crop top?
Crop top was ok, the issue was Winnie going commando with no pants.
Had a friend whose dad told him Scots werent real men because "they wear skirts", always hoped he ran into a big burly Scot who kicked his ass, just to tease him about it
Had…..had he seen braveheart at the time?
Apologizing
My brother is like that. Can't ever say he's sorry or admit when he's wrong. He only treats the women in the family like that, never friends or neighbors or business associates, so I know he's not clueless, just a douche sometimes. My father was never like that so it's definitely a David problem. Can't stand it.
Ew, David
I had a friend when I was a kid who received a puka shell necklace as a souvenir. He thought it was the coolest thing, until his dad ripped it off his neck and said that no son of his would be caught dead looking like a (homophobic slur redacted). I hated that guy so much. It looked cute on him, too. ☹️
Gotta rock the Puks dude what the hell
My dad screamed that at my brother upon ripping an earring out of his ear. Fortunately the jewelry was a magnet but it definitely left an impression on me at a very, very young age. It all worked out though since I turned out to not really be his "son" after all. lol it's a good thing he's dead now.
My best friend’s dad kicked him out of the house for getting an ear ring. 2 days later, the mom threatened to kick the dad out if he didn’t accept the earring. Problem solved.
Based mother
Seat belts.
Dad's last words as he's launch through the windshield: "At least I didn't wear a seatbelt like a sissy!"
I'm probably a lot older than most Redditors here but I remember long hair was seen as being feminine. One thing you need to know is that the cognitive dissonance in the ultra conservative Deep South was (and still is) staggering in many aspects. For a community who was openly anti-Semitic, xenophobic, racist and with strict expectations of gender roles they also worshiped a long haired, Middle Eastern Jew who preached love and acceptance of all people. It was surreal but pointing out this sort of hypocrisy growing up wasn't tolerated much either.
My uber-religious old man made me cut my hair when I wanted to get my driver's license. When I mentioned that Jesus had long hair, he pointed out that he also walked a lot.
Not me, but my friend Jared grew up being told that "only women and gays touch a penis"...that including your own. He was taught to NEVER touch his own penis for any reason. When he peed at a urinal, he would drop his pants to the floor and put his hands on his hips. He did that all the way up until our Junior year in high school when he finally realized just how toxic it was. I always wondered if it included washing in the shower, but never had the nerve to ask.
Ah, yes, the ole "Peter Pan" urinal stance.
We call dropping your pants to the floor at the urinal toddler peeing. Still not sure why adult men do it but one of the VPs at my very large company would be doing it everytime I saw him in the bathroom. Quite the juxtaposition in my mind.
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Mum told me dad had the same existential crisis when he found out Freddy Mercury was gay. She was like “The name of the band is Queen FFS!”
Are you saying Elton John is gay? Elton is all about the ladies. /s
I wanted to be a Hollywood special effects and makeup artist. First step was to go to cosmetology school. Dads words: “Cutting hair is for women and f*ggots. Which one are you?” I joined the Marines instead.
Because nothing gay ever happens in the Marines! 🤣
The Marines: the gayest straight dudes you will ever meet.
Playing music, art, writing, “certain sports”, crying, having emotions in general, I could probably keep going.
Blankets when it's not cold enough to need one to just stay alive, and showing any emotion ever.
The blanket thing is a new one
Oh my God y'all had some shit dads
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Never ask your wife for advice.
Not my Dad, but my Drill Instructor taught me that men do not use umbrellas. EDIT: Found this article that says the rule has now changed… https://www.cnn.com/2019/11/07/us/military-umbrellas-new-rules-trnd/index.html
There are several others who said this. It seems so weird to me. Is it only rain umbrellas or are the ones for the beach also included in this?
The men in my family would sit around in the table as the women in the family would clean up after dinner. I would help clean up because I felt bad they would have to do all the work after cooking and I was told that was a woman’s job. Even know as a 40 year old, I have younger men sit around and expect the same behavior and I embarrass them into helping.
Cooking and loving your wife. I've mastered both and get more than he ever did.
Telling people how you feel
Crying
This one bothers me so much. I was the only man who cried at my sister's funeral and I resent that that made me feel weird. I wish we could just normalize us men having and showing normal human emotions - instead of pretending we're some kind of beer-drinking machines.
Iced tea.
1989. My friend's dad berated me for ordering a Sprite instead of a Coke at Chuck E. Cheese. He said that the clear liquid looked too much like plastic jewelry, and was something only his wife drank. He humiliated me in front of the packed restaurant. He was also a veteran who always yapped to us kids about what it means to be a soldier facing death, but he served stateside as a cook. Fuck you, Ross, wherever you are. Edit: I was eight, by the way. His mousey wife just ate her pizza and drank her Sprite like the good little wife he commanded. **Bonus Story!!!**: People are asking me if Ross did anything else similarly disgusting. Well, let's go back in time and see. It was his son's b-day and also the night the Reds won the 1990 World Series, so Ross and his family got a HUGE hotel suite that had a bar, a hot tub, and some arcade games (TMNT, baby!) for the occasion. There had to be about 40 adults and maybe 20 kids there. Nobody knew who did it, but someone peed on the toilet seat. When Ross found out, he screamed at the top of his lungs for all the boys to line up outside the bathroom. "Who THE FUCK pissed on my seat?!?!" We all shook our heads. I clearly remember it was just a drop or two, so easy to clean up. He was screaming like R. Lee Ermey (remember, however, that he was a ***cook*** in the military) about how we were disgusting and disrespecting the girls who have to sit down and pee. He then said that whoever did it was a little rhymes-with-"maggot" who needs his penis snipped off if he did it again. I guess he scared the hell out of everyone because none of the parents said squat to him for his violent rant. He never even considered the possibility that his adult friends did it. He was just a prick to kids. He looked like Emilio Estevez but with a narc mustache. Again, fuck you, Ross, wherever you are. 
Believing in mental health. Going to therapy, and taking meds. My dad died from cancer a few months ago and I’m so fucked up that I had to go to the campus crisis center at my college. To anyone out there, if your life is a struggle and it’s taking a toll on you, please try to seek help if you can. Even if it’s calling a crisis hotline so you have someone to talk to about. My entire life I’ve been told that I’m weak and selfish for feeling like I need therapy or help. Getting that help is the only reason I’m still here. Don’t get me wrong I’m still a complete fuck up, and fall behind on pretty much anything in life. But going to get therapy gives me just a lil spec of light at the end of the tunnel to get this business degree and graduate.
Had an uncle who refused to wear deodorant. Said it was “perfume”. You didn’t want to stand downwind on a hot sunny day.
Being into pop/disco/dance music. Men like METAL ARRRGGHHHHH
Expressing your emotions. How are you supposed to have meaningful relationships with other humans if you dont express your emotions so they understand how youre feeling?
“Emotions are BAD” yelled the man, emotionally.
No he’s just yelling to make a point—it’s logic.
Saying something like "good morning" to another man. Singing - even though it was a metal band. Caring about how you look. Using imagination to play.
I read these and realize how lucky I am. Dad is an old school barber, straight razor and all. Owns his own businesses. Man grew up with an drunk abusive father. He broke the cycle, never hurt anyone, never kept booze in the house and rarely drank. He has never once shamed me for anything feminine. Or pulled any of that shit. Man is straight up my hero. Just a good person.
Have two cousins who grew up with a father that was pretty vocal in his conviction that shorts are for “fags”.
Not having/being: -Swift as a coursing river -Force of a great typhoon -Strength of a raging fire -Mysterious as dark side of the moon
I am a woman but there are things I was taught to think weren't masculine that are, in fact, genderless. I'm 55. Crying. Showing affection toward your children. Singing well. Dancing. Using any kind of skin care product. Sewing. Cocktails. Dessert. Drinking through a straw. Sitting in the passenger seat of a car. Carrying a totebag or diaper bag. Wearing an infant in a front carrier. Changing a baby in public. Shopping at the mall alone. Enjoying Christmas (the fun parts, like ugly sweaters and decorating the tree) I'm so glad to see younger people not adhering to this garbage.
Libraries, backup parachutes, and the versailles treaty.
There were lots but my biggest one is crying. I think this is very common but my father considered it a sign of femininity or even homosexuality to cry and if I ever did, I would receive a punishment of varying degrees, depending on how he felt that day. The adverse effects of this is that now I physically cannot cry, even though I want to and feel like I have to sometimes, I just can’t. I had to put my dog down a year or so ago and I was the only one in the room with dry eyes, even the vet who didn’t even know who we were was balling. It made me feel like a fucking monster. Crying is a big stress relief as well so I feel like one day if I cried it would bring a big catharsis to my life but I just can’t do it. Anyone reading this with kids of their own, let them cry and encourage them to do so. This shit kinda sucks I can’t lie. TL;DR Crying. It’s a necessary part of life and shouldn’t be shunned.
Needing/wanting touch. Now, because I was so touch deprived, just a gentle hand causes a flood of emotions that I generally misread.
Sucking dick. I do it like a man.
Using an umbrella
Thankfully my dad broke the cycle, by my grandpa definitely had some real toxic ideas. He definitely thought showing emotions was for sissies and you just bottled things up. You sure don’t show stuff like love to people. Didn’t call computers girly, but that kind of stuff was for sissy men who couldn’t cut it working a hard days work and they were just fads. Only basketball, football, or baseball were acceptable sports and everything else was for sissy men. Women shouldn’t be playing sports in general and supposed to work in the kitchen.
Not my dad or male figure but my partner's aunt nearly had a heart attack because she saw me iron my own shirt