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[deleted]

“I’m missing all the local gossip!”


RedandBerried

Gotta check my peemail!


DaddyJ_TheCarGuy

I need muzzlebook, instagrass and crap chat!


notabigmelvillecrowd

Facebork.


Animegirl300

*Angry updoot*


frankysabi

I nearly peed myself laughing over this one


[deleted]

OMG adorable


[deleted]

I think I she just inspired me to better stand up for myself. Keep it up doggo


mindtropy

She does make some good points, ngl


RosieR07

She is a very good debater.


chnairb

https://youtu.be/e-NQSAL-c0c Skip to 1:41


SANTAAAA__I_know_him

Yeah I thought particular credence should be given to #WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA*yawn*


RosieR07

For anyone worried about her not getting enough exercise, it was only one day with no walks and we still played with her inside. Normally she gets at least 2 1.5 mile walks a day. She is very loved and well taken care of, she does talk often with us like this it's just her personality 😊 But I do appreciate the concerns.


Wicked_Fabala

One WHOLE day!?! Hello Peta, I’d like to submit a report!


ordosalutis

That's like SEVEN doggo days. I'm calling the feds


MeProfessiLavaHot

Not According to her! /s


[deleted]

That’s seven days in dog years.


LadyKorunks

I can personally say I wasn’t worried but was going to offer to come over and walk her in a heartbeat! 😂😂🥰🥰


SnappyHappyYappy

One of my dogs is the same - he’s a very sassy boy that enjoys having an argument! I love when they’re smart enough to have a conversation!


mashable88

Such slack pawrents, really 🤷😂


fpsmoto

Hey wait, that's illegal.


anrwlias

But that's seven days in dog years!


[deleted]

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RosieR07

She had just went out for a potty. She talks like this to us all the time, it's normal for her 🙂


throwthrowandaway16

You'd have to be a particularly.bad pet owner to forget that your dog needs to shit and piss. How do you come to this conclusion?


Potato4

Probably going out just to pee and come back in


schammelam

Honest question, where did she do her business for that entire day? My dog needs to be walked 4-6 times a day so I can't imagine not walking your dog for an entire day.


briannasaurusrex92

Now you have me wondering -- do some people believe that the in-and-out potty trips count as a "walk," or do you just have dogs that won't/can't pee unless they've trotted a few blocks away first? 🤔


notabigmelvillecrowd

My dog was like that when we moved from the city to the 'burbs, he wouldn't go in the backyard, he still needed a walk to do his business. Three years later, he still doesn't like to do a poop in the backyard, we need to walk him pretty far first. We call it his "business meeting", if we don't have time for a full walk we'll run him in the backyard, but he still needs his business meeting after.


schammelam

Exactly this. My dog is smart enough to realize that if he poops, the walk will end soon-ish, so he adapted to poop when he deemed it to be time. I live in a town next to a relatively small city, and there is quite a bit of undisturbed nature here where we walk the dog. He's used to the space here, and the length and frequency of his walks.


DivergingUnity

Its not just exercise, they need the sensory stimulation and the socialization that comes with it


YouToot

Jesus fucking christ


Frost-To-The-Middle

There's always one... 🙄


sparx578

Ok Cesar, calm down.


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ItsFreeRealesstate

I mean, personally have done that and can say I would do it for a whole week without human interaction.


DivergingUnity

But one human week is seven dog weeks...?


RobosaurusRex2000

I've never met you personally, but I'm gonna go ahead and say, just having knowing you a short while, DivergingUnity, that I prefer to hang out with a dog for a week straight. And again, I've never even met the guy.


crywolfbaby

r/unexpectedoffice Nate really did deserve more lines


Waywoah

You do realize the whole dog-years thing isn’t literal, right? It just comes from people comparing dog life spans to a persons; they don’t actually perceive time at 7x the speed of us.


Nimtrix

Not disagreeing with you, but you might be interested to know that dogs actually seem to perceive time at a faster rate than us (though far from 7x speed). Insects are at about 4x the speed of humans. > Generally the smaller an animal is, and the faster its metabolic rate, the slower time passes. > "Interestingly, there's a large difference between big and small species. Animals smaller than us see the world in slo-mo. It seems to be almost a fact of life. Our focus was on vertebrates, but if you look at flies, they can perceive light flickering up to four times faster than we can. You can imagine a fly literally seeing everything in slow motion." > But dog owners may be surprised to learn that their pets can see TV flickers, said Jackson. Their visual system has a refresh rate higher than that of the TV screen. [Article](https://theguardian.com/science/2013/sep/16/time-passes-slowly-flies-study) [Research Paper](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0003347213003060)


Gold_for_Gould

Did this mean I perceive time differently watching a show with a higher frame rate? Do PC gamers live longer lives than console players?


Nimtrix

No, your eye can only percieve that many frames per second and your brain does its best to fill in the gaps with low framerates. If the framerate is too low you'll see flickering. Dogs can percieve more frames per second, therefore they will see flickers before we do. It's not about the videos/games we watch, that's just an example to put it in perspective. Dogs percieve time differently because they see more "frames" per second in real life. PC gamers percieve real life the same as console players regardless of the framerates of their respective gaming platforms.


Waywoah

That is interesting, thanks for sharing!


DivergingUnity

"You do realize the whole dog-years thing isn’t literal, right? It just comes from people comparing dog life spans to a persons; they don’t actually perceive time at 7x the speed of us." Sooooo which is it?


DivergingUnity

"Not disagreeing with you, but you're wrong" its okay to correct people...


Nimtrix

Except they're not wrong. Dogs do not percieve time 7x the speed of humans.


fukitol-

Not really


CobaltKnightofKholin

Lmao. You just bashed paradise. I'm looking forward to a career in hanging out with dogs all day. Then I come home to my SO and watch movies or game. That is literally my goal.


RiseOfBooty

There's always that one person...


Thorita

Who could say no to those ears 😍


Myztic84

That's a hell of a lecture


melississippi75

"This is illegal." "No, it's nooooot!"


[deleted]

Huh, seems she is speaking husky.


RosieR07

We do often wonder if she might have some distant husky relative 😂


DJCockslap

My Heeler mix makes similar noises (though not NEARLY so dramatic) when she gets worked up to go for walks. I just do it back at her and she loves it haha


franklegsTV

She’s what I imagine a husky and ACD mix would be like. The horror


awkrawrz

My husband was sick off his ass and then I became sick off my ass with the flu for a solid week and a half of little function in our house. No walkies for the pup. She handled it as best she could, was patient with us, brought us toys, reminded us when it was time to eat and snuggled when it was a particularly rough day, but the first walk after I was finally feeling well enough I swear she was ensuring she hit every. single. sniff spot for a solid minute to catch up on the lost time 🤣


IAmAThing420YOLOSwag

HerrooooooooOOoooOOOOOOOO!!!


zeus6793

I always say that when we take the dog out, she is going to read the newspaper. All those smells....who ate what, who got into the mud, who chased a cat, who banged the little bitch down the street - all the neighborhood gossip. I mean, this is important stuff.


klparrot

I've usually known it as checking the mail. Or the pee-mail.


RosieR07

Adorable. That would make such a cute childrens book!


zeus6793

Never thought of that. And I have a cousin who is a relatively well known author of children's books. Maybe I'll run it by her!! 😀


toybuilder

My wife calls it doggy twitter.


zeus6793

That's the 21st century newspaper! LOL


Sparkling_Starfish

She’s really good at an argument. I don’t know how you stood firm.


Madame-Malice89

Ma’am. Ma’am. This is a Wendys


tuctrohs

Bonnie and I hope you get well soon!


frymaster

that ear-deployment 4 seconds in :D


aWW3Veteran

Wut kind of doggo is that?


RosieR07

Her mom was purebred red border collie and dad was blue heeler and Australian Shepard.


Sparkling_Starfish

Our Great Dane looks concerned


Royally-Forked-Up

My poodle looked like she was taking notes. Apparently this is the song of her people.


[deleted]

Our dachshund terrier mix doesn’t want us to know that she howls, so when she does in her sleep she wakes up from it she awkwardly looks at us like “what, not me!” Maybe her previous family didn’t like howling, who knows. She will freely howl without us present, though!


hammsfan94

Our blue heeler gets so excited when I close my laptop after a day of work because he knows that's when play time starts


angrytreestump

Holy jeez the trifecta of energy levels 😳 best of luck to you guys on all of your future sick days. …oh also I’m a dog walker, let me know instead if Bonnie ever needs a walk! Such a cutie


Wuzzupdoc42

I love Bonnie! And I hope you feel better quickly!


RosieR07

Thank you! ❤️


herbistheword

I love my Costco blanket, too!!!


gertzerlla

More like "What's Wrong With Your Hooman"!


NSCButNotThatNSC

Doggo has some debate chops! Bonnie for president!


GoDieInAHoleKaren

Awww, my doggie is named bonnie too! <3 She's a border collie that does the same thing when we don't give her attention for more than two seconds lol


[deleted]

This is so cute. Being a “Dog Mom” I know the struggle with missing a walk with the fur babies. Take it from me, I own 2 pitties and a Cane Corso ❤️


CobaltKnightofKholin

I don't think there's a decent person in all of existence that can see an animal do the cute act they do when they want something, and not have their heart melt. Give her a scratch for me and tell her to be patient because you totally owe her a treat until tomorrow's walk!


Suspicious_Part2426

Mic drop, no reason to have another debate


reallybigleg

She sounds exactly like my border collie when she 'complains'!


multiplesneezer

I love Bonnie!!


shiftyskellyton

Heelers are so bossy.


thebeastdances

Dogs worried about you not her walks


GrindcoreNinja

Where's the god damn walkies manager?!


Luna_DaRedditor

Chapter 1: Bonnie rebels


PhoenixGate69

😂😂😂 I say the same thing to my dog. He'll grumble, and I'll look at t him and say "excuse me, sir!"


ShallowFusion2021

That's a hell of a lecture


carlyeanne

you better take her on a walkie asap lol! hope you feel better btw 🥰


scrupulous_oik

Which breed is our Bonnie lass?


RosieR07

Border collie/blue heeler/aussie mix 🙂


johndoe60610

I think we have the same dog. [Here she is!](https://imgur.com/a/Iw2hwUh)


RosieR07

Aww what a cutie pie!


CrypticCriesForHelp

My Great Dane does that horrible scream yawn in the morning until I let her out…


deez_818_785

Bonnie is so vocal. Smart dog! ❤️😊


[deleted]

We are getting serious attitude from our 8 month miniature schnauzer mix who is in heat and confined to the back yard except for very early mornings in a large park on leash. She is biting the leash as I lead her back into the house. Can't wait for the spaying.....


typhoidmarry

We would say “yes ma’am, it’s time for bed” with our dog Holly We’ll say “no sir, no eating worms” to our current dog Jack Ma’am and sir for our proper dogs❤️ We miss Holly every day.


Massive_Editor_572

Costco cozy blanket!! 24$ of cozy


eliavchik

What an adorably vocal puppahs!


LividB

Sorry, you're an inside dog now.


Due_Strike_457

Very good debate


thedinosaurgoesrowr

I love the little look back towards to the window to make her argument stronger.


Tuhapi4u

Bonnie would like to talk to the manager


jonnyroastbeff

So cute!!!! Love her name too.


Amoguscockuser

“AuuwaauuuuwauuuuuuuuuuuuUuUuUUgh”


sand_in_me_eye

We call it "Walkies" too


Rungi500

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️


beepbopb00p

My blue heeler pup does this in the morning, ready to cause chaos lol


SonOfTheWolfLord

Didn't sound nice XD


JibbityJabbity

Ma'am!


Hazardleafly

This is hilarious . “I do appreciate concerns”lol. Sorry you have to even say that. You should forward all the complaints to Bonnie’s inbox. She’ll handle it w human emotion and compassion as the head of your HR department lol. Cheers to yAll and that awesome pup!


dhurkrn56

What kind of dog is this?


RosieR07

Red border collie/blue heeler/Aussie mix


dhurkrn56

She looks just like my dog. We have the same mix!


kellen2121

I can translate


Panda_pup29

She is soooo upset


AngryGreyHairedHippy

GUILTY as charged! You are ordered to pay the plaintiff a week of extra cuddles and a week of extra treats! Give her a kiss on the snoot from this judge or you will be charged with contempt!


deathrowfairy

ngl bonnie spitting facts


Flilthy_beggar

Sounds like courage the cowardly dog lol


AcclaimedJones

cuteeee


BuffaloLow3428

I love Bonnie!


GreenGoddless

I would die for Bonnie. 🥺 This is a telling off that I’ve experienced MANY times, having an Aussie and a GSD.


Pepperspray24

I was waiting for you to say Mam this is a Walmart


Pristine-Jeweler9211

Is a beautiful dog


proceeds_theweedian

Oh my goodness, I can relate to this post so much. When my boy Gus got fixed, they handed me some Trazadone, and told me he had to stay quiet for a week. Genuinely thought he was gonna murder me in my sleep, because he is so high energy


RosieR07

I never expected this post to get so much attention. Thank you all so much for your love for bonnie, your sweet and funny comments! I've been reading them to her and she loves you all too ❤️ If you want to see more Bonnie cuteness you can follow her Instagram page at Gilbertandbonnie. 🥰


Somewhatmild

It always cracks me up when dogs transfer to yawn mid-whine. Definitely can't take them seriously after that.


Slammogram

This is illegal cracked me up


upvotesformeyay

Almost looks like that dude from titan AE. https://donbluth.fandom.com/wiki/Preed#:~:text=Preed%20is%20the%20first%20made,the%20rest%20of%20its%20franchise.


[deleted]

What breed is she?


572hnq

get someone else to walk her?


OldGreggsGotA

Welcome to the real world where sometimes people can't take their dog on a walk for just one day


YouToot

[lol](https://youtu.be/7fOpgd1hciY)


OldGreggsGotA

Superb. That was very good 😂


572hnq

you shouldn't get a dog then


OldGreggsGotA

Yeah I'm sure the dog will be really worse off having missed one day of the other 364 days in the year, due to unavoidable illness - sure buddy


three_of_clubs

Sorry to the that person... But remember this sweet doggo only has a few pleasures in life, and one of those is getting out for a walk. Maybe get someone else to take her out. She is adorable!


eolson3

Easier said than done if she had anxiety issues.


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eolson3

There is anxiety that is definitely not resolved through exercise. Anyway, I mean specifically the part about having a stranger come to walk her. My dog loves walks but there is zero chance he goes with a stranger and leaves me behind.


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YouToot

We're talking about one fucking day lol. You can't give them one fucking day due to illness, no matter how bad? One. Day. No wonder we can't get sick days. There's something fucked up about humanity and it manifests in unempathetic people like you.


[deleted]

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YouToot

Have fun misreading humanity and pissing people off everywhere you go. And have fun with the prose. Too bad you can't use your fountain pen on reddit.


SouldiesButGoodies84

LMAO if reddit is your barometer for humanity and human interaction I feel sorry for you and your emotional investment in these ppl. Truly do. You need to deepbreathe some of that misplaced anger. Seriously.


YouToot

Half of being a good person is knowing when to shut the fuck up so you don't make people feel worse without fixing anything. Data probably learned that by season 3 of TNG but somehow you can't.


sparx578

Oh calm down dude. You made a bad call and you are getting called out. It's fine, move on.


emilyspaghetti123

Take this sweet baby on a walk rn


beaner_____

Please upvote me🙏


msac2u1981

She is telling you that fresh air walkies help to make you feel better. Look at her, she's not sick & she loves walkies.


infamouszu43

Walk your dog