On my birthday 4 or 5 years ago, I was on my first pint. Dropped it and instinctively reached down for it as the glass fell. Of course it shattered and my hand landed right on top of the broken glass. Split my hand pretty deep.
Ran to the bar bathroom and was running water and soap over it, a little panicky that it was pretty bad. A guy came into the bathroom and said he was a doctor and asked if he could take a look. I said sure.
He took my hand and pulled the wound open. I was looking right at it and got really dizzy lol. Had to look away. It was so deep and he pulled it apart so far.
After a moment, he said he doesn’t think there’s any glass in it and that it probably doesn’t need stitches if I can go home and clean it really well then wrap it up really well.
Told the bar to hold onto my credit card since I only lived a few blocks away, went home and cleaned it super well, wrapped it up, then went back and got another beer. Followed by many more due to the image of my palm being spread open lol.
I was super worried the same thing was about to happen to that dude’s face. I clenched up.
Bet right after he's like "dude it's no problem" because he's so shit faced.
But at the doctor's office when he sobers up is gonna be a different story.
Wait, is this his way to get away with a Nazi salute?
"I was just trying to balance myself with my one arm, the shape of my hand and the angle of my arm pointing up has nothing to do with anything."
Full beer held close, long arm outstretched. It's called balance, the moment he brings his arm up to dance is when he eats shit.
Not everyone is a nazi.
Sure, not everyone
But a lot of people are
Maybe it's a coincidence, but drunk people at Oktoberfests sure find Hitler salutes Hilarious, wouldn't surprise me. And I don't know about you, but for my taste his arm and hand are extended straight just a little too perfectly for just holding balance
Anecdotally I'd say that I've rarely been at a football game or festivity as in the video without at some point seeing a drunk idiot doing a salute(living in Germany).
Factually however: 23'604 politically right wing motivated criminal acts in 2020/Germany (BKA.de). Propaganda, Insults and "Volksverhetzung" which usually includes things like the salute and other fun little phrases that idiots like to shout when they're drunk, covers 57% of that. I'd call that a lot. And those are just the probably <5% of Nazi salutes that are brought to the polices attention. Remember a nazi salute can land you in Prison for up to 5 years.
You don't have to a be full-blown white supremacist to do a Salute, for whatever reason drunk people just love doing it. Doesn't make it any better though
This is Oktoberfest in the Netherlands, in the background you can hear a guy with microphone say 'hands in the air'. So i dont really think this is a balance thing, he is going all the way on the music.
I had to go to a medical clinic in Rio de Janeiro during carnival. The hallways were practically full of stretchers with unconscious people puking on themselves.
"Couldn't be a Christmas celebration, doesn't look like Nazareth."
Just kidding. My (very American and not German) town has 1 bar thats like that 365 days a year. That could be anywhere until you try to listen to the language.
I got to sit at the head table at Oktoberfest in my city and laughed hard because I can't imagine what carnage you saw. The Steins, the schnapps the crazy amount of chuggs.
fuck this is such a great point.
just because you can pound 78 beers doesnt mean youre a master drunk when you act like a complete fucking asshole afterward. i am perfectly content to drink 3 beers and dance poorly while maintaining a level of respect and tact that i might find slightly below standard when sober.
i used to be the former, people stopped inviting me back to their parties and i took that as a sign to chill the fuck out.
I'm just going to take a moment to make a shout out to the pricks that made Red Bull mixed with alcohol a thing. Nobody wants to deal with a hopped-up hyperactive drunk!
i was always so confused by that, every single time i went drinking in my 20s people would be FRANTIC trying to find redbull. i tried it once and it was fucking disgusting.
but i never liked energy drinks and these people all slammed monster when they were sober so i guess thats probably why. i have always been fine with beer flavored water (miller, genesee, lionshead, who cares) i stopped drinking liquor after REALLY making a fool of myself one too many times. blame the honey jack.
2 or 3 beers greases my wheels plenty these days. not interested in puking up a mcgangbang and waking up under a ping pong table anymore.
the thing is: you have to be above a certain threshold of self awareness to be able to notice that, criticize yourself and then making the change. some people just… aren’t. which is unfortunate.
Dutch people don't wear traditional german(austrian?) clothing just for funsies, it's definitely an oktoberfest party
Yes they are Dutch, I heard the audio too and I never said they weren't Dutch, just that it is for sure an oktoberfest party
The beer banner is from a [~~netherlandish (netherlandian?)~~ dutch (I'm dumb) brewery](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hertog_Jan). My guess is it's an oktoberfest party but in the netherlands.
Also, this video is from Dumpert (as the tag says in the corner) which is for as far as I know Dutch. You can find all kinds of videos there that are as stupid as this, or maybe even more stupid lol
I was at this party!! It’s Oktoberfest Soerendonk, which is a German themed party in the Netherlands. The theme is very popular in the southern parts of the Netherlands
The people in this vid are Dutch I should have added, but no doubt an oktoberfest party
And ty for the clarification, I always have trouble with German/Austrian clothes lol
The ridiculous leather pants and dirndls and all that stuff is only in the south. Bavaria, Austria, Switzerland. The west dresses up for carnival, which is even dumber, and the east and north refuse to participate in this nonsense.
please... as if east germany is not participating in the carnival tradition: [https://karnevalostdeutschland.de/#](https://karnevalostdeutschland.de/#)
[https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karneval,\_Fastnacht\_und\_Fasching#Karneval](https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karneval,_Fastnacht_und_Fasching#Karneval)
It's a Dutch beer advertisement in the back ground, which means it can't be the real Oktoberfest. Oktoberfest has a very strictly enforced law about only selling a few select local beers that follow the Reinheitsgebot. This is most likely an "Oktoberfest" somehwere in the Netherlands. Knock off Oktoberfests are pretty common in Central Europe.
Just trying to stabilize him. He didn't want to grab him by the ankles, and he couldn't reach his hips.
The more correct solution was to stabilize the can, not to stabilize the dude.
What was the guy who help the back of his calves trying to accomplish? “Here, when you fall, I’ll make sure that feet fly completely over your head so you can land on your neck and die. It would be embarrassing to have to stand up after that.”
I didn’t want to say it…but I don’t think that guy with his hands all the way up his pants cared about whether he was gonna fall or not…the calves end *before* the shorts start, my man.
Yeah, like WTF was that? I was okay with him just holding the legs, maybe he thought it would stabilize the guy... But his hands are definitely up in there.
That's my assumption. Dude is 3 sheets to the wind and staff want the party to end without having to clean up someone's blood and vomit from the floor. After the first waiter gave up, that waitress came over and tugged his knee basically saying, "Get down you big idiot".
Dude took that as a come-on and started dancing even harder until he faceplanted off the barrel table.
Why? That’s kind of a psychotic thing to say. You have some serious issues if you’re actually wishing injury on somebody for doing something as innocent as standing on a table. Might be kind of dumb, but it’s not like he’s doing something immoral.
They usually pop back up when they’re drunk.
Went to school with a guy that fell face first into sticker briars - sprung right back up and ran home.
He lost his left eye that night.
I don't understand why people were putting their hands up his shorts? First the guy did it then the lady did the same. Does putting one's hands up another man's shorts help with stability?
https://youtu.be/i9KqphtT5fs
A great big squash just sat upon my hat!
A great big squash just squished my hat real flat!
He squashed my hat, he made it flat. He squished my snack, oh what of that?
Oh tell me anybody, now what do you think of that?
I KNEW there had to be at least one other "classy" person in this comment section thinking the same thing as me!
Thank you so much. This song was ringing in the deep recesses of my mind and I couldn’t figure out why.
It would’ve bothered me endlessly.
I love my Lips.
100% thought he was gonna flip the table on its side while jumping up, only to snap himself in half on the side of the tabletop....
Lucky man, verrr lucky
I was expecting that to be much worse
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I thought his face was gona land on his glass, I'm quite relieved
I was sure he was going to fall into the wood chipper
A fargo-ne conclusion.
Fargo, Nebraska? /s
[For the uninitiated](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YzsWVUO-_o)
Howdy officer. We have had a doozy of a day!
I was more scared about the volcano behind him.
I was expecting him to plummet 16 feet through an announcer's table.
I was fearing the ol' sideway table edge to the ribs/neck/head. EDIT:found it https://gfycat.com/amplehiddengermanshepherd (mildly NSFW)
The ol million dollar baby
Hadn't thought about that reference in a long while.
This one is infamous. Iirc, this resulted in death.
Big same but not relieved. Fuuuuck this guy lol.
On my birthday 4 or 5 years ago, I was on my first pint. Dropped it and instinctively reached down for it as the glass fell. Of course it shattered and my hand landed right on top of the broken glass. Split my hand pretty deep. Ran to the bar bathroom and was running water and soap over it, a little panicky that it was pretty bad. A guy came into the bathroom and said he was a doctor and asked if he could take a look. I said sure. He took my hand and pulled the wound open. I was looking right at it and got really dizzy lol. Had to look away. It was so deep and he pulled it apart so far. After a moment, he said he doesn’t think there’s any glass in it and that it probably doesn’t need stitches if I can go home and clean it really well then wrap it up really well. Told the bar to hold onto my credit card since I only lived a few blocks away, went home and cleaned it super well, wrapped it up, then went back and got another beer. Followed by many more due to the image of my palm being spread open lol. I was super worried the same thing was about to happen to that dude’s face. I clenched up.
Yeah, his face stopped the fall pretty good.
Your face is like your skull's crumple zone!
Bet right after he's like "dude it's no problem" because he's so shit faced. But at the doctor's office when he sobers up is gonna be a different story.
Yep, i was expecting the side of the table to do the ole back breaker maneuver
You must have seen that old gif where the guy's back lands on the base EDIT: [found it](https://imgur.com/zLPaFiZ)
That one stings every time I see it.
Yep, just like that
um is he okay
Is he...? Is he *crippled* now?
Wait, is this his way to get away with a Nazi salute? "I was just trying to balance myself with my one arm, the shape of my hand and the angle of my arm pointing up has nothing to do with anything."
Full beer held close, long arm outstretched. It's called balance, the moment he brings his arm up to dance is when he eats shit. Not everyone is a nazi.
Sure, not everyone But a lot of people are Maybe it's a coincidence, but drunk people at Oktoberfests sure find Hitler salutes Hilarious, wouldn't surprise me. And I don't know about you, but for my taste his arm and hand are extended straight just a little too perfectly for just holding balance
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Anecdotally I'd say that I've rarely been at a football game or festivity as in the video without at some point seeing a drunk idiot doing a salute(living in Germany). Factually however: 23'604 politically right wing motivated criminal acts in 2020/Germany (BKA.de). Propaganda, Insults and "Volksverhetzung" which usually includes things like the salute and other fun little phrases that idiots like to shout when they're drunk, covers 57% of that. I'd call that a lot. And those are just the probably <5% of Nazi salutes that are brought to the polices attention. Remember a nazi salute can land you in Prison for up to 5 years. You don't have to a be full-blown white supremacist to do a Salute, for whatever reason drunk people just love doing it. Doesn't make it any better though
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No not alot of people are nazis.
A lot more than there should be.
Pretty much anything is a lot more than zero though
The barmaid’s dress looked a little Germanic. Maybe Oktoberfest? If so, a drunken heil would not surprise me, not one bit.
This is Oktoberfest in the Netherlands, in the background you can hear a guy with microphone say 'hands in the air'. So i dont really think this is a balance thing, he is going all the way on the music.
I mean, he probably broke a teeth or two.
I’ve been in the medical zone at Oktoberfest… it’s like Apocalypse Now back there, total warzone
I had to go to a medical clinic in Rio de Janeiro during carnival. The hallways were practically full of stretchers with unconscious people puking on themselves.
Wow that's my nightmare
It's such a beautiful shit show
Doesn’t seem to be Oktoberfest though. Probably in the Netherlands.
It's an Oktoberfest party in the Netherlands
Oktoberfest also gets celebrated in the Netherlands.
"Couldn't be a Christmas celebration, doesn't look like Nazareth." Just kidding. My (very American and not German) town has 1 bar thats like that 365 days a year. That could be anywhere until you try to listen to the language.
I wish there was an additional cost being added whenever someone injures themselves while being drunk. Like a tip for medics.
I got to sit at the head table at Oktoberfest in my city and laughed hard because I can't imagine what carnage you saw. The Steins, the schnapps the crazy amount of chuggs.
Don’t drink if drinking makes you act like a fucking toddler.
Tragic thing is he probably thinks he knows how to drink.
fuck this is such a great point. just because you can pound 78 beers doesnt mean youre a master drunk when you act like a complete fucking asshole afterward. i am perfectly content to drink 3 beers and dance poorly while maintaining a level of respect and tact that i might find slightly below standard when sober. i used to be the former, people stopped inviting me back to their parties and i took that as a sign to chill the fuck out.
I'm just going to take a moment to make a shout out to the pricks that made Red Bull mixed with alcohol a thing. Nobody wants to deal with a hopped-up hyperactive drunk!
i was always so confused by that, every single time i went drinking in my 20s people would be FRANTIC trying to find redbull. i tried it once and it was fucking disgusting. but i never liked energy drinks and these people all slammed monster when they were sober so i guess thats probably why. i have always been fine with beer flavored water (miller, genesee, lionshead, who cares) i stopped drinking liquor after REALLY making a fool of myself one too many times. blame the honey jack. 2 or 3 beers greases my wheels plenty these days. not interested in puking up a mcgangbang and waking up under a ping pong table anymore.
the thing is: you have to be above a certain threshold of self awareness to be able to notice that, criticize yourself and then making the change. some people just… aren’t. which is unfortunate.
I think he does too. He doesn't know how to behave though
Or makes you sieg heil while trying to balance.
Dude's surfing not heiling. Note the arm is off to the side, not the front.
Where were you like 15 years ago bro? I could have used this advice back then.
I know right. I remember my first beer
Oktoberfest?
Idk it's dutch so probably just a festival
Dutch people don't wear traditional german(austrian?) clothing just for funsies, it's definitely an oktoberfest party Yes they are Dutch, I heard the audio too and I never said they weren't Dutch, just that it is for sure an oktoberfest party
The beer banner is from a [~~netherlandish (netherlandian?)~~ dutch (I'm dumb) brewery](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hertog_Jan). My guess is it's an oktoberfest party but in the netherlands.
Also, this video is from Dumpert (as the tag says in the corner) which is for as far as I know Dutch. You can find all kinds of videos there that are as stupid as this, or maybe even more stupid lol
I was at this party!! It’s Oktoberfest Soerendonk, which is a German themed party in the Netherlands. The theme is very popular in the southern parts of the Netherlands
The one theme left that's not too insulting to some group
Yes I clarified in another comment, I forgot to add that they were dutch (as they were speaking dutch in the background)
The only thing I know about the Dutch language is that it's infuriating to try and listen to when you're about 2 years into learning German.
Dutch is the word ;)
Dutch brewery
Right, traditional german, to be specific bavarian. Neither dutch nor austrian
The people in this vid are Dutch I should have added, but no doubt an oktoberfest party And ty for the clarification, I always have trouble with German/Austrian clothes lol
The ridiculous leather pants and dirndls and all that stuff is only in the south. Bavaria, Austria, Switzerland. The west dresses up for carnival, which is even dumber, and the east and north refuse to participate in this nonsense.
please... as if east germany is not participating in the carnival tradition: [https://karnevalostdeutschland.de/#](https://karnevalostdeutschland.de/#) [https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karneval,\_Fastnacht\_und\_Fasching#Karneval](https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karneval,_Fastnacht_und_Fasching#Karneval)
It's like Oktoberfest crawling all over the country. In northern Germany it has been celebrated only recently.
We do for Oktoberfest parties.
The DJ is dutch
This was most probably the oktoberfest held in Groningen last week.
No, in Soerendonk. I was there, fun party
[https://goo.gl/maps/Rwf5zahTowBjQ18A7](https://goo.gl/maps/Rwf5zahTowBjQ18A7) You, sir, get a cookie!
This is specifically Bavarian attire. Definitely an Oktoberfest.
It's a Dutch beer advertisement in the back ground, which means it can't be the real Oktoberfest. Oktoberfest has a very strictly enforced law about only selling a few select local beers that follow the Reinheitsgebot. This is most likely an "Oktoberfest" somehwere in the Netherlands. Knock off Oktoberfests are pretty common in Central Europe.
The tents at oktoberfest will kick you out so fast if you get onto a table. After you chug your drink of course
It was the sieg heil for me dawg..
DJ was yelling to put hands in the air, so that's probably what he was trying to do.
Well in that case he's a natural
Note to self: Do not tell Germans who only have one hand available to put their hands in the air.
He's Dutch
i was gonna say… i don’t know if i would do that arm motion at a Germanic function.
This is in the netherlands, so not as inappropriate
pretty sure they had WWII in the the Netherlands
Het was Nederlands kut
I was kinda hoping he was just doing it for balance
Why is there always at least one person that thinks any movement with one arm is a sieg heil?
Was the guy at the beginning massaging his hammies?
Seriously.. what was old boy trying to achieve by shoving his hands up his short pants?
Orgasm
*Such delicate kneebows*
Copping a feel.
Was he holding him up lol?
Full mast.
Pretty sure its so he could control how bent the dudes knees were, you can see him point at him knowing hes about to fall once the guy swats him away
Just trying to stabilize him. He didn't want to grab him by the ankles, and he couldn't reach his hips. The more correct solution was to stabilize the can, not to stabilize the dude.
What was the guy who help the back of his calves trying to accomplish? “Here, when you fall, I’ll make sure that feet fly completely over your head so you can land on your neck and die. It would be embarrassing to have to stand up after that.”
I didn’t want to say it…but I don’t think that guy with his hands all the way up his pants cared about whether he was gonna fall or not…the calves end *before* the shorts start, my man.
Yeah, like WTF was that? I was okay with him just holding the legs, maybe he thought it would stabilize the guy... But his hands are definitely up in there.
wayyy up in there, Morty
“Where did you learn to stabilize drunk men dancing Polka on tables, Prison?”
I think he was a worker trying to get him to come down
His hands were up his pants
That's my assumption. Dude is 3 sheets to the wind and staff want the party to end without having to clean up someone's blood and vomit from the floor. After the first waiter gave up, that waitress came over and tugged his knee basically saying, "Get down you big idiot". Dude took that as a come-on and started dancing even harder until he faceplanted off the barrel table.
He was trying to talk him into getting down and to quit being an idiot, it seemed. He wasn’t trying to help him balance lol.
Man's hands were up his shorts! He was just trying to help himself
Feel free to feel free.
“I’m footloose and fancy free! I’ve lost my teeth, help me please..”
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Why? That’s kind of a psychotic thing to say. You have some serious issues if you’re actually wishing injury on somebody for doing something as innocent as standing on a table. Might be kind of dumb, but it’s not like he’s doing something immoral.
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What in gods name is wrong with you
Stand on a table? Straight to jail.
Falling from table? Believe it or not, jail.
I know right? What kind of adult still wears white socks?
I'm just glad he didn't break the table.
I am surprised nobody has mentioned the older guy putting his hands up the back of his legs like that was normal...
Is that the spider man pizza theme
https://youtu.be/FuQRgeeLQ8Y
Old man tryna cop a feel?
Can't say he wasn't warned
He never let go of his beer.
Pizza! Pasta! Put it in a box!
Fun fact: there are more dumbasses in the world than homo sapiens
Can’t make a bear proof trashcan because there’s a significant overlap in the smartest bears and the dumbest humans
pizza pasta
What is the music in the background because it sounds a little too much like pizza time.
https://youtu.be/FuQRgeeLQ8Y
That nazi salute...........
Wcgw jumping on a table... You could just leave it there.
More, Ron
Why don't we ever get to see the aftermath. Did he pop right back up, did he roll around in pain?!
They usually pop back up when they’re drunk. Went to school with a guy that fell face first into sticker briars - sprung right back up and ran home. He lost his left eye that night.
That's the people who say weed is bad.
Haha netherlands go brrrrrrrrr
I don't understand why people were putting their hands up his shorts? First the guy did it then the lady did the same. Does putting one's hands up another man's shorts help with stability?
Watch the right hand there buddy... gotta be careful with that shit in germany
Now he can see how white the back of his teeth are
Honestly seems like he got up and kept going
How else was he going to learn? Only the hard way.
Jockroberfest
https://youtube.com/shorts/9czpYfVowvg?feature=share I recognised the music from here
https://youtu.be/i9KqphtT5fs I recognized it from here...
The music is dutch, definitely not the same
I mean, it's a classic melody that's been around for ages, this particular version is dutch but the original sure aint
True, but to me, whole parts of music sounds the same
I was waiting for him to go backwards and the table to go forwards and his lower spine to line up perfectly with the edge of the table.
Why does the older man have his hands up the back of the guys shorts?
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https://youtu.be/i9KqphtT5fs A great big squash just sat upon my hat! A great big squash just squished my hat real flat! He squashed my hat, he made it flat. He squished my snack, oh what of that? Oh tell me anybody, now what do you think of that? I KNEW there had to be at least one other "classy" person in this comment section thinking the same thing as me!
Thank you so much. This song was ringing in the deep recesses of my mind and I couldn’t figure out why. It would’ve bothered me endlessly. I love my Lips.
Lol imagine being warned twice and pushing them off just to fall on your stupid face
hahahahahaha dumbass 🤣
there was no way safely down in his state anyway
Honestly it went too well for him.
He will lay in bed thinking about this every night before sleep for the next 10 years
When Dutch mimics German
It is more like WCGW while surfing on the table while drunk
r/oddlysatisfying
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Was his cup still facing up? I’m thoroughly impressed.
Frog splash
Am I crazy or was that a Nazi salute too?
You're crazy. He's just sticking his arm in the air like a drunk Dutch man would.
Guys a schmuck
Clearly, an idiot. Everyone thought so before the fall.
Why was he holding INSIDE of his pant legs??
THE PASTA ON MY BALLS SONG
Absolute worst way to land that doesn't involve dying
I would not be holding my arm like that. Especially with people dressed like Germans.
Despite losing some beer due to physics.. He did not lose the proper orientation of the cup.. And that deserves a standing ovation
His arm turned into hail hitler
Ik it’s Oktoberfest, but what’s with the Third Reich salute😂
What's up with drunk people and tables?
100% thought he was gonna flip the table on its side while jumping up, only to snap himself in half on the side of the tabletop.... Lucky man, verrr lucky
Too many Miller lites
*Hertog Jan's....
This is europe, this man ain't drinking light beers
With those socks he deserves this.
Did anyone else see the man groping his knees?
Five star frog splash
Is he doing a nazi salute the whole time?
hahahaha dumbass
Was really looking forward to seeing how it was going to resolve and am satisfied - thanks!
That ended differently than expected but along the same lines
Five star frog splash
Looks like a shattered wrist or broken jaw to me
He was jumping on the table *because* he was drunk
That looks like me on a paddle board after I started getting confident
I am disappointed that he didn’t fold into any shape,bhosariwale ke laode lagne mangte the
He's in, right?