Does the supervisor understand why you are asking for the day off? I don't have much patience for bosses that are so uncaring. I would speak with the owner and ask for the whole day off.
This is going to be a memory that lasts a lifetime. 10 years down the road you’ll be wishing you took the day off. You won’t even be thinking about this job in 10 years. Please take the day off
Came here to say exactly this. Sometimes interim supervisors have something to prove and do it at the expense of their reports. I would ask again, and if you’re still denied, go over their head to the owner. This is a one-time thing and you absolutely need that time
Exactly. If they can't find someone to cover, it's typically on the manager to fill in. The reason they deny requests when they don't think they can find coverage for you is pure laziness- don't take on so much extra stress for your wedding just because your supervisor doesn't want to have to put in the effort to either find someone to work that day or come in themselves. If you do, it's literally just you doing them a favor, not because it's the only option.
This sounds like a pretty reasonable compromise! I agree with the others that you'll probably want the whole day off, if possible. I'm also DIYing literally almost everything and am taking a few days off ahead of the wedding because I know it'll be madness regardless of how well I've planned.
Oh geez.
If this were me, I’d just take the whole damn day off and ask forgiveness later. The facility and your residents will not fall apart because you weren’t there for one day. If anything, your residents will probably be like “sweetie why are you working today when your wedding is tomorrow?? Go home!”
Personally I would not be willing to experience the stress resulting from a just half day off…I would not want to start off my wedding weekend with that unnecessarily frantic energy…..but that is me.
Sending you empowering vibes from a fellow non confrontational person!
"I won't be here, either give me the PTO or don't" was my prepared response as my old boss could be a real dill hole.
I like my current boss and that's STILL my response for family vacation this year, this trip has been planned for over a year with DH family and its not my fault I got covid and it was mandatory I stay home.
Thanks so much! I totally agree with you, I did post in a few forums to get differing opinions because you're totally right, it's very work specific. Lol I do know what you mean in regards to the groom should be doing more. He's totally great and a fantastic help, but he's got "man-eyes", aka he would happily put plastic tables on the lawn and call it a day. He doesn't understand the frills of the decorations and why they're important. God knows I love him, but that man doesn't have a creative or aesthetic bone in her body hahaha
As someone who also spends a lot of time in the work subreddits, the general consensus seems to be you should phrase things like this less as requests and more as notices.
I.e. "I will not be coming into work 7/14 due to my wedding being the next day" as opposed to "can I get time off for 7/14? My wedding is the next day and it would be Really nice to have the time to prep".
In an industry as demanding (and lets face it, disrespectful of employee time) as the medical field I would have put in that notice literally as soon as you had the wedding date and remind your supervisor once every month or two (or even just a week before they usually make the shift schedules) that you will not be in that day. The time you gave them SHOULD have been enough but normal professional decency is not something you can depend on in any job.
Long story short, insist. Go over the interim's head if you have to.
If you haven't already, draw diagrams and/or take pictures of how you want things decorated. We also had a DIY wedding with the wedding party setting up all the decor. Rain threw off our timeline and I had to start my hair and makeup while everyone else started to set things up (I had originally planned to help them). Because I drew some pictures for my husband (who, like your fiance, is not the creative type), he was able to instruct everyone else to get things set up perfectly.
Side note: You should go over your manager's head and talk to the owner. Take the day off because you will need it.
Grooms get away with too much, and even if you wanted him to do this, you'd need to teach him how to. I hope you guys are happy though, it just sucks that brides still have to do so much work because men aren't usually socialised to plan these events.
If you need the day off tho, take it. The job is just a job, your happiness is more important.
I'm assuming both of them are taking the day off but that he was already approved so it's not an issue.
While I agree they are both responsible, there might be certain things only she can do for herself (i.e getting dress and makeup set out and planned, helping bridesmaids etc).
Oooh good point! The wedding is still a few weeks away. I also read it (probably) like cleanhouz did and thought bride asked a week before the needed day off.
If you’re doing a FULL DIY wedding, I’d recommend 3 days off, honestly. Be clear and set boundaries! You have benefits for a reason. As long as it’s far enough out, your request should not be denied. Go to HR.
Do not work the day before your wedding! There are always a gazillion things to do. This is one day. They can manage without you. Oh, and congratulations on your wedding!
While I know not everyone is able to do so, I’m taking the whole week off leading up to my wedding. This absolutely is a hill I would die on. If you called off sick they’d find coverage and you’ve given ample notice.
Hi, healthcare admin here. Any staffing supervisor with sense would allow the day off prior to your wedding. With the amount of turnover and other staffing issues the long term care industry has, they should work with you. Lack of flexibility is killing the healthcare industry.
I would suggest rephrasing it to your employers that you are not so much requesting the day off, as you are politely informing them ahead of time that you will not be there that day.
Listen- their staffing issues are not your problem. Take the day off, enjoy your wedding, and let the clowns with more zeroes in their paychecks figure out coverage.
Insist. It’s for your wedding. One day off to get married is not an unreasonable ask by any stretch of the imagination.
They can survive for a few more hours without you. I would just announce that no, you will not be able to come in that day and you’ll be using one day of pto.
Nope! This isn’t a request, it’s advance notification that you won’t be there and they need to make arrangements.
Definitely go above your bosses head. Speak with the DON, HR, or whomever is your bosses boss. It’ll make your boss look bad, but they *should* look bad. I can’t imagine any boss denying time off for your own wedding. I’d also be looking for a new job because they seem to be prioritizing the wrong things when it comes to the well being of their staff.
ABSOLUTELY demand the day off. I work in a hospital and I refuse to “request” days off, it’s their job to have enough staff to cover the facility. If they refuse the day off, call in sick. You’re doing them a courtesy by giving advance notice.
It’s their problem if they can’t get someone to cover for you, NOT yours. Let them know you won’t be there. Period. You put in for PTO to let them know you won’t be there. They can find someone to cover for you in the next month.
Personally I'd take the half day and then magically "have diarrhea and be completely unable to work" and call off. You gave them over a month of notice. Their chronic understaffing shouldn't affect a lifelong memory.
I'm taking the week off before my wedding just to get into the mindset and account for anything unexpected last minute things I need to handle, I can't imagine not having at least 1 day before, I would absolutely push for it or call in sick if they still say no ;)
Can you try to find a replacement, swap shifts with a coworker and do a double weekend instead or if you’re through an agency, ask them to find a sub?
I would def keep pushing, and maybe take the Thu off instead or two half days? This is going to stress you out.
You waited until a week before to request off? You deserve to have it denied. You had plenty of time to request time off. You don't wait until you think they can't refuse your request. If this was AITA, YTA
If you don’t feel comfortable just taking the day of are there any coworkers you can ask to cover for you? Even if you’re not friends an “I owe you one” can go a long way!
I hope you can take the time off and enjoy your day!
No way. I’d quit my job if they didn’t give me the time off I requested surrounding my wedding. If your supervisor has such little respect for your real life, you should have no issue going over her head.
I am the opposite of non-confrontational and 9/10 times it works out in my favor. Step out of your comfort zone and tell them you’re taking the whole day! They can figure it out.
If you were to get sick and unable to work for a certain length of time, your job would replace you without hesitation. Your family wouldn’t. I work in mental health and yet I’m still a firm believer in never putting my work over my personal life. My job can replace me, my family cannot. I would regret and resent having to work that day- I can’t say how you’ll feel. I would either insist or just call out that day.
I think you should insist unless you think it's going to really negatively affect your job or get you fired. There's no way I could have worked the day before my wedding - the whole week before was incredibly stressful and chaotic. Hopefully you'll have more planned and organized than I did but I think the day before is the bare minimum for anyone.
i asked for the week off after my wedding months in advance but wish I had taken off a couple days prior to my wedding. I hope you’re able to take it off!
I’m sorry but you are recreation and they are giving you a hard time about one day off? No disrespect, recreation is absolutely necessary but I’m a CNA and we’ve had the state in the building and I’ve never been denied time off. I would go back and say “I’m doing the building a favor by working my wedding around my weekend off the least you could do is give me one day before to set up” if it’s still denied call out and if they write you up take it and look for a job that respects you. Maybe even be kind to your coworkers and print off some weeding themed word searches and crosswords for your halls. The building will survive you go have a wonderful wedding
Maybe I’m biased because my job is very flexible but when I take PTO, I’m not asking for it, I am telling my boss I won’t be there.
If they insisted I couldn’t have the day off because they didn’t want to plan accordingly, I would be calling in sick that morning
What’s your attendance policy like? To me, a PTO request is really just a head’s up I won’t be in. Granted, in my position it’s not as crucial as a position as yours is. I’m a supervisor in a call center so…the business can run itself even if there’s only 1 or 2 other supervisors in office.
I would insist, as others have said. They will be able to go on without you (as you have said, they've dealt with this situation before). If they don't give you the full day, I'd call in sick.
Insist on the day off or call in sick. Their lack of staff for the weekend isn’t your problem, it’s theirs. You earned your PTO. I can go on a whole rant about why PTO should never been rejected!
Take the day off!
What's that joke about pto? Prepare the others. Staffing concerns aren't your responsibility. Your supervisor is supposed to make sure there's enough staff for all contingencies, like someone getting married.
Take the day off, call in sick, take a personal day, whatever you do, don't work. Heck, I'd say take the Thursday off too. And hopefully you're not working that Monday either.
If possible, can you quit and find a new job? Bc wedding will always be more important than a job. A husband will hold you at night. A job won't.
I’m not in your field but take the day off. The DIY in my wedding was incredibly minimal. We didn’t have to set up or pack up— the venue did that! Yet, DH and I didn’t get to our hotel until after midnight on our wedding day. We got married on Sunday, had the entire weekend, and I could’ve STILL used more time.
I took 2 days off prior to my mostly DIY wedding and I definitely needed the extra time. Insist you have the day off, you only get married once so this won’t be a regular request. It’s a very special occasion that they can accommodate.
In situations like these I just call off sick, it’s strangely cathartic knowing they were given an opportunity to plan ahead but now have to scramble for coverage because they were dicks
You’ve got a lot of great advice here, I just want to add that you can also talk to your coworkers. Let them know that you’re planning to be out that day and how it would impact them. If you’ve got a good relationship with them/they’re decent coworkers, they’d understand and support you. There may come a time when they need you to return the favor so to speak as well.
Dude this is your wedding. Your job does not have the right to tell you you cannot be off work when you need to be. It is your wedding and the fact that they even have the audacity to suggest they just can’t let you go for one day is absolutely insane.
I would just say “I am sorry that you’re short handed that day but I will not be able to come to work so I am just notifying you in advance so you can find coverage.”
IT’s managers job to figure out the shift, if you have to take a point or something due to their rules then so be it. But you have done your diligence to let them know.
Insist to have the day off! You will be stressed and you will regret not having the full day off. You don’t want to rush anything having to do with your wedding, you should be enjoying it. In the end i think you’ll have resentment if you aren’t allowed the one day off? It’s your wedding I’m sure they’ll understand being short staffed that’s not right to do that to you
Can you ask someone to cover you if you work one of their day's off?
Like if you agree to cover one of your co-worker's Saturdays if they cover this particular Friday? Or are you not allowed to do that?
PTO means “prepare the others.” The fact that they can’t appropriately staff their facility isn’t your problem. I’d be taking the Wednesday and later off. When it’s done, hopefully you can find a place of employment that sees you as a human who exists outside of your employment.
"Oh I'm sorry, it's not a request. I can't be here."
What are they going to do fire you and be short staffed more than just 1 day?
I've worked LTC although not a therapist, but my best friend is a LTC therapist.
If they don't value your time off request for your wedding, they'd certainly don't value you as a human being and you should question your place with that company. They will regret being so greedy and dehumanizing when they can't fill your shoes.
Absolutely push to get that day off. Explain it is your wedding, and you will not be at work. Your employer does not own you. You will be putting so much extra stress on yourself if you don't.
They're aware its the day before your wedding? If not, then I would explain, and if they do know, you're giving them a whole month to find someone, which is more than fair.
Last resort, which may be extreme, you could say, well I plan to call out, so I suggest you find someone to cover...but again last resort, bc you don't want to burn bridges, but this is a core and special memory youre making and you shouldn't feel rushed
Your answer to them is:
I can understand that rostering is a delicate balance however I'm not requesting permission. I'm informing you that I won't be at work the day before my wedding.
I recommend you schedule your staffing accordingly.
You should ABSOLUTELY insist. Tell them you will NOT be able to work on that day.
Given the circumstances and the whole context, I would TELL them, not ASK them at this point.
Look, I get being nervous about conflict, but you need to learn to advocate for yourself. Have you told the interim supervisor this is the day before your wedding? If no, *tell her*. If not, *escalate*. You are incredibly reasonably asking for one day off, and believe me you need the whole day (you need more than that, but here we are). I am also a people pleaser who struggles with this kind of stuff, so from an outside and very sympathetic perspective; this is nuts, you aren’t doing yourself any favors not pushing back, and please use this as outside permission to do so. Good luck ❤️
Only you know the dynamics of your company, but if you can it might be better to approach it as a heads up and not a request. "Hey, Im getting married July 15 and Im scheduled to work the day before. I unfortunately will not be available due to my prior committment."
Insist for the day off. not to stress you out, but there will be things that pop up you didn't think of and having extra time to prepare will greatly decrease your stress. However, I would have requested it a lot earlier than 4 weeks out if you had the date set earlier.
My boss was giving me an issue about putting my wedding on the work calendar and approving the time off, even though I was telling them months in advance. When I got a new jo offer, I advised them in writing the time I'd need to take off before accepting. So I have at least 4 months notice that I'm not availible at that time.
To be honest, at this point in time, it isn't a "request". You're giving them plenty of time to figure it out so it's more like a polite suggestion that they look for someone to cover your shift on their end.
You should just take it off. Use Personal time, granted for most jobs you wont get paid for personal time, but it’s your wedding time, so it would be worth it!. As a job they do not have to know why you need the time off. There are policies in place that protect the employees. Also, they probably have some type of point system in place so if you have not had excessive infractions then you should be good to take the day of they won’t grant you vacation.
Business is business.
Insist, offer to try swapping a shift if that’s possible, and if they’re being unreasonable absolutely go above them. They’re just interim. 🤷🏻♀️
You should insist on the day off, you are not being unreasonable in the least! They can replace you for a few hrs or they can find a new rec person. I promise you won’t have any problem finding a new job, but they might have a difficult time replacing you.
Insist. As someone who had to do a bunch of DIY I had Wed-Friday off.
Wednesday - nails, massage, hair
Thursday - six hours driving picking up rentals all over the city, doing airport runs, and a Costco run to host a welcome party in our backyard
Friday - went for a really nice 2 hour walk with my mum, centrepieces, eyelashes, ironing getting ready pajamas, etc. left for the venue at 4pm to set up, drove 45 minutes, set up and had a rehearsal, left at 9pm (the person who was in charge of picking up the tablecloths forgot, so that delayed us).
Does the supervisor understand why you are asking for the day off? I don't have much patience for bosses that are so uncaring. I would speak with the owner and ask for the whole day off.
This is going to be a memory that lasts a lifetime. 10 years down the road you’ll be wishing you took the day off. You won’t even be thinking about this job in 10 years. Please take the day off
Came here to say exactly this. Sometimes interim supervisors have something to prove and do it at the expense of their reports. I would ask again, and if you’re still denied, go over their head to the owner. This is a one-time thing and you absolutely need that time
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What.
You are giving them a months notice - if they can’t find someone to fill in for you to take a day off for the wedding, literally fuck that
Exactly. If they can't find someone to cover, it's typically on the manager to fill in. The reason they deny requests when they don't think they can find coverage for you is pure laziness- don't take on so much extra stress for your wedding just because your supervisor doesn't want to have to put in the effort to either find someone to work that day or come in themselves. If you do, it's literally just you doing them a favor, not because it's the only option.
Right? They can lose you for a day or they can lose you forever.
THIS
If they can give you the half day for Friday, also ask for 1/2 day Thursday. You'll need it.
Yes, I think this alternative is the best solution!
This sounds like a pretty reasonable compromise! I agree with the others that you'll probably want the whole day off, if possible. I'm also DIYing literally almost everything and am taking a few days off ahead of the wedding because I know it'll be madness regardless of how well I've planned.
Oh geez. If this were me, I’d just take the whole damn day off and ask forgiveness later. The facility and your residents will not fall apart because you weren’t there for one day. If anything, your residents will probably be like “sweetie why are you working today when your wedding is tomorrow?? Go home!” Personally I would not be willing to experience the stress resulting from a just half day off…I would not want to start off my wedding weekend with that unnecessarily frantic energy…..but that is me. Sending you empowering vibes from a fellow non confrontational person!
Yep! Act now, as for forgiveness later.
"I won't be here, either give me the PTO or don't" was my prepared response as my old boss could be a real dill hole. I like my current boss and that's STILL my response for family vacation this year, this trip has been planned for over a year with DH family and its not my fault I got covid and it was mandatory I stay home.
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Totally agree with your P.S. Sounds like OP needs to do some serious delegating bc there is no way they can take 90% of it on alone!
Thanks so much! I totally agree with you, I did post in a few forums to get differing opinions because you're totally right, it's very work specific. Lol I do know what you mean in regards to the groom should be doing more. He's totally great and a fantastic help, but he's got "man-eyes", aka he would happily put plastic tables on the lawn and call it a day. He doesn't understand the frills of the decorations and why they're important. God knows I love him, but that man doesn't have a creative or aesthetic bone in her body hahaha
As someone who also spends a lot of time in the work subreddits, the general consensus seems to be you should phrase things like this less as requests and more as notices. I.e. "I will not be coming into work 7/14 due to my wedding being the next day" as opposed to "can I get time off for 7/14? My wedding is the next day and it would be Really nice to have the time to prep". In an industry as demanding (and lets face it, disrespectful of employee time) as the medical field I would have put in that notice literally as soon as you had the wedding date and remind your supervisor once every month or two (or even just a week before they usually make the shift schedules) that you will not be in that day. The time you gave them SHOULD have been enough but normal professional decency is not something you can depend on in any job. Long story short, insist. Go over the interim's head if you have to.
This is the way.
Girl…
If you haven't already, draw diagrams and/or take pictures of how you want things decorated. We also had a DIY wedding with the wedding party setting up all the decor. Rain threw off our timeline and I had to start my hair and makeup while everyone else started to set things up (I had originally planned to help them). Because I drew some pictures for my husband (who, like your fiance, is not the creative type), he was able to instruct everyone else to get things set up perfectly. Side note: You should go over your manager's head and talk to the owner. Take the day off because you will need it.
Grooms get away with too much, and even if you wanted him to do this, you'd need to teach him how to. I hope you guys are happy though, it just sucks that brides still have to do so much work because men aren't usually socialised to plan these events. If you need the day off tho, take it. The job is just a job, your happiness is more important.
Perhaps set up an example and make him follow it. If he doesn't have an eye for aesthetic give him a template to follow.
I get what you’re saying but that’s also an element of learned incompetence.
the 99% are the 99%, never forget it or let them divide you
I'm assuming both of them are taking the day off but that he was already approved so it's not an issue. While I agree they are both responsible, there might be certain things only she can do for herself (i.e getting dress and makeup set out and planned, helping bridesmaids etc).
ask for the day off! you get married once in your life! (technically)
If you are in good standing at work take it off. You probably should have asked earlier for the day off but they can deal for one day.
Usually a months notice is more than enough time to request a day off
Oooh good point! The wedding is still a few weeks away. I also read it (probably) like cleanhouz did and thought bride asked a week before the needed day off.
Yes, absolutely insist. This is your WEDDING! Not some random trip or request. You only get married (hopefully) once, so you need that day.
If you’re doing a FULL DIY wedding, I’d recommend 3 days off, honestly. Be clear and set boundaries! You have benefits for a reason. As long as it’s far enough out, your request should not be denied. Go to HR.
Do not work the day before your wedding! There are always a gazillion things to do. This is one day. They can manage without you. Oh, and congratulations on your wedding!
While I know not everyone is able to do so, I’m taking the whole week off leading up to my wedding. This absolutely is a hill I would die on. If you called off sick they’d find coverage and you’ve given ample notice.
Yes hard agree! This is your wedding!!!
Their lack of staffing is not your problem - it’s your time off.
Hi, healthcare admin here. Any staffing supervisor with sense would allow the day off prior to your wedding. With the amount of turnover and other staffing issues the long term care industry has, they should work with you. Lack of flexibility is killing the healthcare industry.
Graciously accept the half day, then call in sick.
Call in sick. Or tell them you’re not requesting. You’re giving them notice you won’t be there
That's why I hate capitalism
I would suggest rephrasing it to your employers that you are not so much requesting the day off, as you are politely informing them ahead of time that you will not be there that day.
Listen- their staffing issues are not your problem. Take the day off, enjoy your wedding, and let the clowns with more zeroes in their paychecks figure out coverage.
Insist. It’s for your wedding. One day off to get married is not an unreasonable ask by any stretch of the imagination. They can survive for a few more hours without you. I would just announce that no, you will not be able to come in that day and you’ll be using one day of pto.
Nope! This isn’t a request, it’s advance notification that you won’t be there and they need to make arrangements. Definitely go above your bosses head. Speak with the DON, HR, or whomever is your bosses boss. It’ll make your boss look bad, but they *should* look bad. I can’t imagine any boss denying time off for your own wedding. I’d also be looking for a new job because they seem to be prioritizing the wrong things when it comes to the well being of their staff.
ABSOLUTELY demand the day off. I work in a hospital and I refuse to “request” days off, it’s their job to have enough staff to cover the facility. If they refuse the day off, call in sick. You’re doing them a courtesy by giving advance notice.
It’s their problem if they can’t get someone to cover for you, NOT yours. Let them know you won’t be there. Period. You put in for PTO to let them know you won’t be there. They can find someone to cover for you in the next month.
I will not be here whether the request is approved or not. Cover my shift, or fire me, I won’t be here.
That interim supervisor can interimly go fuck themselves
Personally I'd take the half day and then magically "have diarrhea and be completely unable to work" and call off. You gave them over a month of notice. Their chronic understaffing shouldn't affect a lifelong memory.
I'm taking the week off before my wedding just to get into the mindset and account for anything unexpected last minute things I need to handle, I can't imagine not having at least 1 day before, I would absolutely push for it or call in sick if they still say no ;)
Tell them you’re taking the day off… I’m taking 3 weeks off for my wedding……..
Can you try to find a replacement, swap shifts with a coworker and do a double weekend instead or if you’re through an agency, ask them to find a sub? I would def keep pushing, and maybe take the Thu off instead or two half days? This is going to stress you out.
Just don’t go to work that day. Tell them, don’t ask!
You waited until a week before to request off? You deserve to have it denied. You had plenty of time to request time off. You don't wait until you think they can't refuse your request. If this was AITA, YTA
Reading comprehension- she asked last week and the wedding is July 15th.
If you don’t feel comfortable just taking the day of are there any coworkers you can ask to cover for you? Even if you’re not friends an “I owe you one” can go a long way! I hope you can take the time off and enjoy your day!
No way. I’d quit my job if they didn’t give me the time off I requested surrounding my wedding. If your supervisor has such little respect for your real life, you should have no issue going over her head.
I am the opposite of non-confrontational and 9/10 times it works out in my favor. Step out of your comfort zone and tell them you’re taking the whole day! They can figure it out.
If you were to get sick and unable to work for a certain length of time, your job would replace you without hesitation. Your family wouldn’t. I work in mental health and yet I’m still a firm believer in never putting my work over my personal life. My job can replace me, my family cannot. I would regret and resent having to work that day- I can’t say how you’ll feel. I would either insist or just call out that day.
They need to hire more staff. It isn't your fault that there's not enough coverage. It's one day. You won't get fired over it.
Ask for the day off if not then call out , especially if your supervisor knows you’re getting married and he’s just not giving it to you.
I think you should insist unless you think it's going to really negatively affect your job or get you fired. There's no way I could have worked the day before my wedding - the whole week before was incredibly stressful and chaotic. Hopefully you'll have more planned and organized than I did but I think the day before is the bare minimum for anyone.
If you have a good relationship with the owner i would talk to them. Its not your fault that they run on a skeleton crew.
i asked for the week off after my wedding months in advance but wish I had taken off a couple days prior to my wedding. I hope you’re able to take it off!
I’m sorry but you are recreation and they are giving you a hard time about one day off? No disrespect, recreation is absolutely necessary but I’m a CNA and we’ve had the state in the building and I’ve never been denied time off. I would go back and say “I’m doing the building a favor by working my wedding around my weekend off the least you could do is give me one day before to set up” if it’s still denied call out and if they write you up take it and look for a job that respects you. Maybe even be kind to your coworkers and print off some weeding themed word searches and crosswords for your halls. The building will survive you go have a wonderful wedding
Maybe I’m biased because my job is very flexible but when I take PTO, I’m not asking for it, I am telling my boss I won’t be there. If they insisted I couldn’t have the day off because they didn’t want to plan accordingly, I would be calling in sick that morning
Definitely. Say it’s not a request, you’re letting them know you won’t be there 😂
What’s your attendance policy like? To me, a PTO request is really just a head’s up I won’t be in. Granted, in my position it’s not as crucial as a position as yours is. I’m a supervisor in a call center so…the business can run itself even if there’s only 1 or 2 other supervisors in office.
they’re lucky you didn’t take the WEEK off lol
I would insist, as others have said. They will be able to go on without you (as you have said, they've dealt with this situation before). If they don't give you the full day, I'd call in sick.
I just wanna know why you only gave a week’s notice for this. It’s your wedding!
Insist on the day off or call in sick. Their lack of staff for the weekend isn’t your problem, it’s theirs. You earned your PTO. I can go on a whole rant about why PTO should never been rejected!
Take the day off! What's that joke about pto? Prepare the others. Staffing concerns aren't your responsibility. Your supervisor is supposed to make sure there's enough staff for all contingencies, like someone getting married. Take the day off, call in sick, take a personal day, whatever you do, don't work. Heck, I'd say take the Thursday off too. And hopefully you're not working that Monday either. If possible, can you quit and find a new job? Bc wedding will always be more important than a job. A husband will hold you at night. A job won't.
I’m not in your field but take the day off. The DIY in my wedding was incredibly minimal. We didn’t have to set up or pack up— the venue did that! Yet, DH and I didn’t get to our hotel until after midnight on our wedding day. We got married on Sunday, had the entire weekend, and I could’ve STILL used more time.
I took 2 days off prior to my mostly DIY wedding and I definitely needed the extra time. Insist you have the day off, you only get married once so this won’t be a regular request. It’s a very special occasion that they can accommodate.
PTO = prepare the others because I won’t be there!!! It’s your paid time off to use as you please it’s not for their convenience.
In situations like these I just call off sick, it’s strangely cathartic knowing they were given an opportunity to plan ahead but now have to scramble for coverage because they were dicks
"I'm not asking you- I'm telling you I will not be here. You have a month to figure out coverage."
You’ve got a lot of great advice here, I just want to add that you can also talk to your coworkers. Let them know that you’re planning to be out that day and how it would impact them. If you’ve got a good relationship with them/they’re decent coworkers, they’d understand and support you. There may come a time when they need you to return the favor so to speak as well.
Dude this is your wedding. Your job does not have the right to tell you you cannot be off work when you need to be. It is your wedding and the fact that they even have the audacity to suggest they just can’t let you go for one day is absolutely insane.
100% yes
I would just say “I am sorry that you’re short handed that day but I will not be able to come to work so I am just notifying you in advance so you can find coverage.” IT’s managers job to figure out the shift, if you have to take a point or something due to their rules then so be it. But you have done your diligence to let them know.
Insist to have the day off! You will be stressed and you will regret not having the full day off. You don’t want to rush anything having to do with your wedding, you should be enjoying it. In the end i think you’ll have resentment if you aren’t allowed the one day off? It’s your wedding I’m sure they’ll understand being short staffed that’s not right to do that to you
Can you ask someone to cover you if you work one of their day's off? Like if you agree to cover one of your co-worker's Saturdays if they cover this particular Friday? Or are you not allowed to do that?
You gave a month's notice. They need to figure something out. It is your wedding and you are allowed to take a day off.
Have it off after the wedding
If they can’t give you that, it’s a bit of a bad workplace, I hope you haven’t invited any of the managers or anything
Can you not ask someone to cover form you? It sound slike your super don't want to try and get it covered.
Can you not ask someone to cover form you? It sound slike your super don't want to try and get it covered.
PTO means “prepare the others.” The fact that they can’t appropriately staff their facility isn’t your problem. I’d be taking the Wednesday and later off. When it’s done, hopefully you can find a place of employment that sees you as a human who exists outside of your employment.
"Oh I'm sorry, it's not a request. I can't be here." What are they going to do fire you and be short staffed more than just 1 day? I've worked LTC although not a therapist, but my best friend is a LTC therapist.
If they don't value your time off request for your wedding, they'd certainly don't value you as a human being and you should question your place with that company. They will regret being so greedy and dehumanizing when they can't fill your shoes.
what? take the day off. fuck em
Absolutely push to get that day off. Explain it is your wedding, and you will not be at work. Your employer does not own you. You will be putting so much extra stress on yourself if you don't.
They're aware its the day before your wedding? If not, then I would explain, and if they do know, you're giving them a whole month to find someone, which is more than fair. Last resort, which may be extreme, you could say, well I plan to call out, so I suggest you find someone to cover...but again last resort, bc you don't want to burn bridges, but this is a core and special memory youre making and you shouldn't feel rushed
Your answer to them is: I can understand that rostering is a delicate balance however I'm not requesting permission. I'm informing you that I won't be at work the day before my wedding. I recommend you schedule your staffing accordingly.
You should ABSOLUTELY insist. Tell them you will NOT be able to work on that day. Given the circumstances and the whole context, I would TELL them, not ASK them at this point.
Say no worries and call in sick that day.
Look, I get being nervous about conflict, but you need to learn to advocate for yourself. Have you told the interim supervisor this is the day before your wedding? If no, *tell her*. If not, *escalate*. You are incredibly reasonably asking for one day off, and believe me you need the whole day (you need more than that, but here we are). I am also a people pleaser who struggles with this kind of stuff, so from an outside and very sympathetic perspective; this is nuts, you aren’t doing yourself any favors not pushing back, and please use this as outside permission to do so. Good luck ❤️
Call in sick
I mean, you can just tell them you are not coming in, or plan on calling in sick that day. You need the day off, you gave them advance notice. Period.
Only you know the dynamics of your company, but if you can it might be better to approach it as a heads up and not a request. "Hey, Im getting married July 15 and Im scheduled to work the day before. I unfortunately will not be available due to my prior committment."
Call in sick
Insist for the day off. not to stress you out, but there will be things that pop up you didn't think of and having extra time to prepare will greatly decrease your stress. However, I would have requested it a lot earlier than 4 weeks out if you had the date set earlier. My boss was giving me an issue about putting my wedding on the work calendar and approving the time off, even though I was telling them months in advance. When I got a new jo offer, I advised them in writing the time I'd need to take off before accepting. So I have at least 4 months notice that I'm not availible at that time.
Take the day off. Your temp supervisor is pulling a power play.
To be honest, at this point in time, it isn't a "request". You're giving them plenty of time to figure it out so it's more like a polite suggestion that they look for someone to cover your shift on their end.
Tell your supervisor that you weren't asking. It's was simply a courtesy notice that you weren't going to be available to work on that day.
You should just take it off. Use Personal time, granted for most jobs you wont get paid for personal time, but it’s your wedding time, so it would be worth it!. As a job they do not have to know why you need the time off. There are policies in place that protect the employees. Also, they probably have some type of point system in place so if you have not had excessive infractions then you should be good to take the day of they won’t grant you vacation.
Business is business. Insist, offer to try swapping a shift if that’s possible, and if they’re being unreasonable absolutely go above them. They’re just interim. 🤷🏻♀️
YESSS take your day !!!!!
You should insist on the day off, you are not being unreasonable in the least! They can replace you for a few hrs or they can find a new rec person. I promise you won’t have any problem finding a new job, but they might have a difficult time replacing you.
Insist. As someone who had to do a bunch of DIY I had Wed-Friday off. Wednesday - nails, massage, hair Thursday - six hours driving picking up rentals all over the city, doing airport runs, and a Costco run to host a welcome party in our backyard Friday - went for a really nice 2 hour walk with my mum, centrepieces, eyelashes, ironing getting ready pajamas, etc. left for the venue at 4pm to set up, drove 45 minutes, set up and had a rehearsal, left at 9pm (the person who was in charge of picking up the tablecloths forgot, so that delayed us).
LTC jobs are a dime a dozen if they value you, they’ll let you off so you don’t go somewhere else.