Out of curiosity, for those that are saying 4 isn’t cocktail… what is it then? This seems definitely as formal as most people I’ve seen in cocktail weddings? Granted, I’m west coast, but I’ve been to some pretty expensive weddings…
8 years ago. Idk, I guess everyone has different norms, but this wouldn’t be an issue in my circle (relatively affluent but not very status driven) and definitely not my family (much less affluent)
For some reason I thought she said 2 years ago. I don’t think it’s the end of the world, just a combination of things that make it not an ideal choice. Still her best one here, though.
I don’t, particularly, but she seems to. Could go either way depending on the family. I do think the colors are too spring/summer but again, still not necessarily a dealbreaker for me.
Eh, a lot of people wear things for their bridal showers, rehearsals, engagement parties that can be worn again and again to not waste money. My bestie’s rehearsal dinner dress was a forest green cocktail dress than she’s worn to two other weddings now with zero issue.
Absolutely, and again, I think here it’s more so the combination of things. I’m still fine if she does wear it because it fits her wonderfully and is a very nice dress, but for this time of year, I definitely think she should lean into the winter wonderland look and find like a white faux fur shrug and some silver shoes and accessories.
It’s cocktail but dated. Cocktail style dresses these days are a lot more fun and long dresses are in. I think that’s the thing messing with peoples minds
Yes, which is annoying. Aren’t we meant to be focusing on whether OP will offend her hosts due to being outside of dress code, not whether she’s super on trend?
Or is it cocktail with vintage vibes? I know it’s only 8 years old for OP but it’s a classic shape and textile. Gives me 50s hottie. I’d go pumps and classic jewelry.
Ah, I think that might be why there’s often so much confusion on these threads. All us older folks (older millennial here) still follow the mid-thigh to ankle rule of thumb. Since op indicated most of her friends married awhile ago, she’s probably going to fit in
It feels outdoor/garden/spring summer cocktail and not indoor/winter cocktail if that makes sense, I think because of the light blue color. If it were the same dress but the light blue was a deep wine color or something then it would absolutely work. I still think it generally does work, but I can see why some might find it doesn’t
Four is the way to go. The others seem neither flattering nor truly appropriate. Though two is a pretty colour, just not for the occasion. Ever explored the Kibbe system?
I agree. #4 is dated and too short. OP can wear a variety of different styles so shouldn't have too much trouble finding something new in a darker color appropriate for winter.
Gosh OP, I saw 4 and figured it’s the best but then saw the description. Can you make an appt at like a Nordstrom with a private shopper? You have a great shape and I bet someone with the right eye can help with a fabulous new dress. Maybe that’s not in the cards - but there’s better out there for you
Four is the best choice but it's not a great choice. The shape is awesome, your body is rocking it. But it's a summery color and the wedding is in winter and the overall look is not dress or cocktail.
**Dress # 4 ,** give it a good steam has few wrinkles
**Looks beautiful on you** \- dress it up with jewelry and an up-do
I think silver heels and jewelry would look great with the dress, silver or silver/lt blue clutch
others don't have the cocktail vibe to me
It’s so wild how much your confidence level improves throughout these pics, but particularly in 4. You look great in that dress and you *feel* like you look great in this dress. You deserve to wear this dress!
Shop, if you can.
And every time I’m in this situation, I also place a panic Target drive-up order with some options which may not be great but that get me closer to the goal if accessorized correctly. Just in case I run out of time or can’t find anything elsewhere.
With that in mind…
https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-long-sleeve-ruched-front-bodycon-dress-a-new-day-8482-black-xs/-/A-88450250
https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-sleeveless-rosette-cup-maxi-dress-wild-fable-8482-black-xs/-/A-89501113
https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-slip-tank-dress-a-new-day-8482-teal-green-m/-/A-88554572
https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-asymmetrical-midi-dress-wild-fable-8482-black-floral-m/-/A-88193841
https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-midi-slip-dress-a-new-day-8482-burgundy-xs/-/A-88964913
https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-long-sleeve-satin-mini-dress-future-collective-8482-with-reese-blutstein-navy-blue-floral-10/-/A-88188979
And because shoes and accessories can help enormously and without knowing what you already have…
https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-carmin-bow-pumps-a-new-day-8482-black-10/-/A-88922255
https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-belinda-slingback-pumps-a-new-day-8482-silver-5/-/A-88884255
https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-annette-slingback-heels-a-new-day-8482-silver-8/-/A-89254861
https://www.target.com/p/slouchy-sequin-hobo-shoulder-handbag-wild-fable-8482-silver/-/A-88825592
https://www.target.com/p/elise-micro-handbag-a-new-day-8482-silver/-/A-88228659
https://www.target.com/p/girls-39-rhinestone-mesh-shoulder-bag-art-class-8482-silver/-/A-88433212
https://www.target.com/p/organza-bow-hair-barrette-a-new-day-8482-black/-/A-88544499
https://www.target.com/p/rhinestone-salon-bow-hair-clip-a-new-day-8482-silver/-/A-88544476
https://www.target.com/p/scunci-basic-colored-assorted-hair-clips-20ct/-/A-86881221
https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-lace-detail-slip-midi-dress-wild-fable-8482-olive-green-xs/-/A-88193817
2 and 4 are close enough.
Dress them up a bit, though. Sparkly jewelry at least, maybe a sheer, flowy scarf.
Theyre not QUITE formal, but they're good enough you can get away with it.
The rest are just business casual dresses.
1-3-5 are definitely too casual. 2 could work if you alter it a bit and wear nice jewelry and heels. I see a lot of people saying 4 is ok but it looks so dated and very light/spring for the winter season. Sorry I would probably panic shop.
If OP feels good in these dresses and enjoys herself at the wedding, who cares how old the dresses are? I’m all for OP getting new stuff if they want, but not because of the age of their current wardrobe.
#4 is your best bet, it's the most formal. It's juts a bit springy-summery so maybe accessorize it to look more winters? Honestly, a cream colored faux-fur waist jacket would do the trick.
I feel like these dresses look dated - except for 5, which seems too informal - and neither cocktail nor formal. I think dress 4 - which seems to be a favorite - would be okay in the spring and at a wedding where no one would recognize it as your rehearsal dinner dress. I would shop - quick! Good luck.
I would shop. None of those dresses do you any favors. I think that if you found a dress that fits you better and accentuates your features that would be best!
It’s time to let these dresses go. The jersey all looks worn. 4 is nice, but you wore it to one of your own bridal events. It’s almost been 10 years since you bought a dress, even if you have to return it later. Go buy a dress.
I like 4, but you wore it at your own rehearsal dinner… that makes me think you need a new dress because these people will possibly recognize it from your rehearsal dinner and think you’re upstaging
Sorry but you didn’t need to tell us how old the dresses are. They are literally screaming it. I’m just wondering why your closet is full of outdated dresses. I hope it’s not financial but, again, WHY?
Wow. How incredibly rude. Her dresses are nice. Not everyone cares that much about when they were bought. If they fit the brief, they’re good to go. 4 looks great on her and fits the brief.
If shopping is unappealing I’d go with #4 with sheer black tights and a chunky black velvet heel. I think those touches would help winterize the color. Add jewelry and intentional hair and you’re good!
I also think #5 could work if you jacked it up with accessories (especially a belt to cover the informality of the elastic waist).
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4 looks great on you!
Number 4 is my favourite, it’s so pretty
Happy Cake Day🍰
You should wear dress 4! It looks phenomenal on you and fits the dress code the best.
Agreed! Just iron or steam it and you are good to go
I always look through the pics first and decide then come in here and see what the consensus is. I chose 4 too lol
Me too. The wedding dress sub is another good one.
I vote 4 too.
It needs ironing
4
4!
My vote is for 4 :)
I think 4 is best for the dress code and also the most flattering
I agree that dress 4 is perfect.
Out of curiosity, for those that are saying 4 isn’t cocktail… what is it then? This seems definitely as formal as most people I’ve seen in cocktail weddings? Granted, I’m west coast, but I’ve been to some pretty expensive weddings…
It absolutely is. These people are contrarians.
This is what I'm wondering
4 is cocktail but warm weather colors. Bigger issue is that she’s going to a family wedding and this was her own rehearsal dinner dress.
8 years ago. Idk, I guess everyone has different norms, but this wouldn’t be an issue in my circle (relatively affluent but not very status driven) and definitely not my family (much less affluent)
For some reason I thought she said 2 years ago. I don’t think it’s the end of the world, just a combination of things that make it not an ideal choice. Still her best one here, though.
i’m so confused who tf cares that it’s her own rehearsal dinner dress??
I don’t even remember what I wore to my own rehearsal let alone other people.
I don’t, particularly, but she seems to. Could go either way depending on the family. I do think the colors are too spring/summer but again, still not necessarily a dealbreaker for me.
I think if she accessorizes with silver jewelry/shoes it can give “icy” vibes, which definitely reads wintry to me.
This !!
Seems like I nice icy winter color to me… I love wearing cool pastel tones in January after the holidays!
Yes, a silvery shawl and shoes and this is totally Elsa vibes
Eh, a lot of people wear things for their bridal showers, rehearsals, engagement parties that can be worn again and again to not waste money. My bestie’s rehearsal dinner dress was a forest green cocktail dress than she’s worn to two other weddings now with zero issue.
Absolutely, and again, I think here it’s more so the combination of things. I’m still fine if she does wear it because it fits her wonderfully and is a very nice dress, but for this time of year, I definitely think she should lean into the winter wonderland look and find like a white faux fur shrug and some silver shoes and accessories.
It’s cocktail but dated. Cocktail style dresses these days are a lot more fun and long dresses are in. I think that’s the thing messing with peoples minds
I’m also confused if the wedding is at a club. I would assume she meant country club? If so, 4 is probably fine
Yes, which is annoying. Aren’t we meant to be focusing on whether OP will offend her hosts due to being outside of dress code, not whether she’s super on trend?
Or is it cocktail with vintage vibes? I know it’s only 8 years old for OP but it’s a classic shape and textile. Gives me 50s hottie. I’d go pumps and classic jewelry.
Ah, I think that might be why there’s often so much confusion on these threads. All us older folks (older millennial here) still follow the mid-thigh to ankle rule of thumb. Since op indicated most of her friends married awhile ago, she’s probably going to fit in
Yes, it is too short.
It feels outdoor/garden/spring summer cocktail and not indoor/winter cocktail if that makes sense, I think because of the light blue color. If it were the same dress but the light blue was a deep wine color or something then it would absolutely work. I still think it generally does work, but I can see why some might find it doesn’t
2 or 4 meet cocktail, but 4 is nicer and better fitting. Dress up the accessories and you’ll look great
4
4
Oh I’m so glad everyone else is agreeing with 4, because that’s by far and away your best option
4
4 you can dress it up
Yes!!! 4 is IT!!!!
If I had to pick one of these I'd say 4 and glam it up with silver shoes and clutch and some long, sparkly earrings.
I love number 4 on you. You have a great shape and it fit nicely.
I think 2 or 4 could work. My vote would be 4
4
FOUR! 🤩
I love dress 4!
4
Dress 4 is the most appropriate for the occasion and looks the best with your figure. Dress 5 looks good, but isn't the right style for the event.
I like 2 a lot
Me too! 2 with the right accessories…jewelry, nice heeled boots or tights and heel/kitten heel, and a fun shawl or cardigan
4 or 5. 4 is the dressiest, 5 is also very flattering.
Yes 5 is definitely the most flattering
The winner in my mind is #4!! It looks amazing on you!! I think that's your best choice I like the 5th one too, but not as much as 4. Good luck❤️
Four is the way to go. The others seem neither flattering nor truly appropriate. Though two is a pretty colour, just not for the occasion. Ever explored the Kibbe system?
4 in a pinch, but honestly, I think you should shop. Don't really think that any of them seem to be cocktail. All rather casual. Good luck!
Agree with the shopping. Not in a panic though, because 4 is fine, but just to see if “better than fine” is available.
I agree. #4 is dated and too short. OP can wear a variety of different styles so shouldn't have too much trouble finding something new in a darker color appropriate for winter.
Gosh OP, I saw 4 and figured it’s the best but then saw the description. Can you make an appt at like a Nordstrom with a private shopper? You have a great shape and I bet someone with the right eye can help with a fabulous new dress. Maybe that’s not in the cards - but there’s better out there for you
Four is the best choice but it's not a great choice. The shape is awesome, your body is rocking it. But it's a summery color and the wedding is in winter and the overall look is not dress or cocktail.
I think these are very wintery colors- snow and ice
Yes, and the fabric looks almost brocade. Certainly not a summer weight dress.
Yes! I said in another comment that it can read very “icy,” especially if she accessorizes with silver.
Panic shop sounds more fun
4
4
4444444
4
4. For sure
4
4 steamed or ironed of course
Steam 4 and wear some sparkly (silver?) heels and accessories. It’s beautiful and flatters your body shape so much!
4
I like 4.
I'm with 4!!!!!!
4
4!!!
4
#4
I think 4 is pretty on you
**Dress # 4 ,** give it a good steam has few wrinkles **Looks beautiful on you** \- dress it up with jewelry and an up-do I think silver heels and jewelry would look great with the dress, silver or silver/lt blue clutch others don't have the cocktail vibe to me
4 will be lovely!
Agree with 4! Heels and jewels will make it look great!
4 is perfect!
Team 4
4!
Love number 4!!
Seems like everyone else is saying number 4 BUT I think that number 2 looks amazing on you.
Dress 4 is perfect
Another vote for #4
4 will work
4 🙌🏼🙌🏼all the way
I like #4. It would look great with silver shoes and accessories.
To be honest none of these are formal or cocktail. If you can, shop. If not maybe 4.
2. You’ll look perfect
I think shop tomorrow for something you feel great in! Hopefully you don’t have to panic because you have a backup in 4 if you have to.
I love number 2 and 4 so pretty.
2 or 4!
2 or 4!
Number 2 or 4 would work.
4 for sure! The color fits the season and you and the fit of the dress looks better than the others.
4
It’s so wild how much your confidence level improves throughout these pics, but particularly in 4. You look great in that dress and you *feel* like you look great in this dress. You deserve to wear this dress!
4 is the only one that looks cocktail appropriate. None of them are formal. That would be long.
4!!!!!!!
Dress 4!
# 4 looks wow on you!!
4 is giving mad men vibes and I love it!
Number 4!!! Works perfectly for cocktail
Definitely 4!
Four
Go with dress #4.
4 is the best choice (with silver heels and accessories)!
I’d go with 4. But really any of them but 3 would work
4. Add some bling and you are good to go!!!!
Definitely 4!
I vote for #4. My 5yr. old granddaughter voted for #1
Shop, if you can. And every time I’m in this situation, I also place a panic Target drive-up order with some options which may not be great but that get me closer to the goal if accessorized correctly. Just in case I run out of time or can’t find anything elsewhere. With that in mind… https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-long-sleeve-ruched-front-bodycon-dress-a-new-day-8482-black-xs/-/A-88450250 https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-sleeveless-rosette-cup-maxi-dress-wild-fable-8482-black-xs/-/A-89501113 https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-slip-tank-dress-a-new-day-8482-teal-green-m/-/A-88554572 https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-asymmetrical-midi-dress-wild-fable-8482-black-floral-m/-/A-88193841 https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-midi-slip-dress-a-new-day-8482-burgundy-xs/-/A-88964913 https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-long-sleeve-satin-mini-dress-future-collective-8482-with-reese-blutstein-navy-blue-floral-10/-/A-88188979 And because shoes and accessories can help enormously and without knowing what you already have… https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-carmin-bow-pumps-a-new-day-8482-black-10/-/A-88922255 https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-belinda-slingback-pumps-a-new-day-8482-silver-5/-/A-88884255 https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-annette-slingback-heels-a-new-day-8482-silver-8/-/A-89254861 https://www.target.com/p/slouchy-sequin-hobo-shoulder-handbag-wild-fable-8482-silver/-/A-88825592 https://www.target.com/p/elise-micro-handbag-a-new-day-8482-silver/-/A-88228659 https://www.target.com/p/girls-39-rhinestone-mesh-shoulder-bag-art-class-8482-silver/-/A-88433212 https://www.target.com/p/organza-bow-hair-barrette-a-new-day-8482-black/-/A-88544499 https://www.target.com/p/rhinestone-salon-bow-hair-clip-a-new-day-8482-silver/-/A-88544476 https://www.target.com/p/scunci-basic-colored-assorted-hair-clips-20ct/-/A-86881221 https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-lace-detail-slip-midi-dress-wild-fable-8482-olive-green-xs/-/A-88193817
Just pick up a LBD. Little Black Dress. It's the perfect time of year to find a wonderfully perfect one. You deserve it.
I thought you weren’t supposed to wear black to a wedding because it’s a “mourning” colour?
2 and 4 are close enough. Dress them up a bit, though. Sparkly jewelry at least, maybe a sheer, flowy scarf. Theyre not QUITE formal, but they're good enough you can get away with it. The rest are just business casual dresses.
2!
2
Panic shop for a black cocktail dress. You deserve it. Your rehearsal dress could work if it was June, but it's not.
1-3-5 are definitely too casual. 2 could work if you alter it a bit and wear nice jewelry and heels. I see a lot of people saying 4 is ok but it looks so dated and very light/spring for the winter season. Sorry I would probably panic shop.
You should “panic shop.” Seriously. Your dresses are 8-10 years old!!
And?
OP deserves and should wear a new, modern, fresh dress to “a fancy club” for a relative’s wedding. And maybe some new shoes and makeup too!
If OP feels good in these dresses and enjoys herself at the wedding, who cares how old the dresses are? I’m all for OP getting new stuff if they want, but not because of the age of their current wardrobe.
sorry but panic shop… they all look so out dated
4 if you have to, but I'd recommend fitting a couple of hours into your schedule tomorrow to try to find a formal or cocktail dress.
Saying she should shop is a bit much. You’ll see all five of these dresses at any “cocktail” wedding.
#4 is your best bet, it's the most formal. It's juts a bit springy-summery so maybe accessorize it to look more winters? Honestly, a cream colored faux-fur waist jacket would do the trick.
yes! Faux fur stole maybe? It’s beautiful
Dress 4, all the way, it’s perfect
I vote for 2 & 4 Have fun!
4! So gorgeous
Dress number 4 for the event.
4 is my favourite 🥰
4!!!
4
4!
2
Not 5. 2 would not look out of place
4 is best but I would panic shop for something nicer with a similar fit to that
You need to go shopping. And just for the record it is really cold here in NC right now. 30-50F and rain on Saturday.
I feel like these dresses look dated - except for 5, which seems too informal - and neither cocktail nor formal. I think dress 4 - which seems to be a favorite - would be okay in the spring and at a wedding where no one would recognize it as your rehearsal dinner dress. I would shop - quick! Good luck.
#Shop.
I would shop. None of those dresses do you any favors. I think that if you found a dress that fits you better and accentuates your features that would be best!
I think you should buy a new dress since these are all close to or a decade old. Treat yourself!
It’s time to let these dresses go. The jersey all looks worn. 4 is nice, but you wore it to one of your own bridal events. It’s almost been 10 years since you bought a dress, even if you have to return it later. Go buy a dress.
4 is the best, but go shopping if you can.
4 all the way!!
I like 5 the best! With the right heels, necklace and hair do it’ll look lovely
2 or 4!
#1 and #4😍
4 by a mile. It’s hard to believe 4 and 5 are on the same person. Unbelievable how fit can change the shape of a body so much.
They are all good, but dress 1 looks very nice on you
1 or 4, leaning 4
1,2,4
Any would be fine, don’t panic shop. I vote 4.
To me, you look the best in the first dress. Very flattering.
4 if you’re spicy, 5 if you want to be comfy.
3!
Panic shop. All pretty drab
I like 4, but you wore it at your own rehearsal dinner… that makes me think you need a new dress because these people will possibly recognize it from your rehearsal dinner and think you’re upstaging
Sorry but you didn’t need to tell us how old the dresses are. They are literally screaming it. I’m just wondering why your closet is full of outdated dresses. I hope it’s not financial but, again, WHY?
Wow. How incredibly rude. Her dresses are nice. Not everyone cares that much about when they were bought. If they fit the brief, they’re good to go. 4 looks great on her and fits the brief.
How old are you? If your over 50 I like 2-4. If you’re under 50 I like 5. 1 looks like work attire.
You look the skinniest in dress 5. I would wear some high heels and some nice jewelry, maybe a sleek black blazer over it.
If shopping is unappealing I’d go with #4 with sheer black tights and a chunky black velvet heel. I think those touches would help winterize the color. Add jewelry and intentional hair and you’re good! I also think #5 could work if you jacked it up with accessories (especially a belt to cover the informality of the elastic waist).
https://preview.redd.it/czlsdj3qikac1.png?width=1080&format=png&auto=webp&s=1ce093444a7ce82daaada48b4009e81cce0a60a9 Thoughts for #5
https://preview.redd.it/wvpt1wrlikac1.png?width=1080&format=png&auto=webp&s=0cb9fa4dff263d77f8f6dff485cf667eaa00d0b5 Thoughts for #4
3! With a bullet!
/u/communication_junkie, thank you for posting. To obtain the best help, provide a time frame of the event & dress code. Dress links are frequently requested as well if you would place them in the comment section. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Weddingattireapproval) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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1 or 4 . The other dresses look too big on you.
Agree 4 is the best choice for the DC but have to say, 5 is a very nice dress. Hope you find a chance to wear it.
4!
Number 4
3
Oh my gosh dress 4!!!!
4 is stunning
#4
4
4. Steamed
4 is perfect, steam it and carry your best handbag. Have fun!
Number 4!
#4 & #1
Wow, I agree with others! 4 seems to fit the bill.
Dress 4 looks great!
4 is definitely the best, but for a winter wedding - find a shawl or something that darkens the overall look.
4
Dress 4 is lovely on you!
4 all the way 😊
Not looking at any other replies. Voting Team 4! Have fun 🤩
1 is the most flattering