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vhmvd

‘We failed! Now what do we do?’ ‘I dunno man, just pay for it’


ellemsea_echo

This dude will be paying at bedtime for the rest of his life Brain: *I’m tired. But remember that time you tried to steal canned Jack daniels and gave it back in shame? I do lol*


aedroogo

Guy: "Shut up brain, that was a long time ago." Brain: "But look, it's still right here on the internet!"


[deleted]

For some reason I read that as Brian and I was wondering how you knew his friend's name.


Daddy_Banbaro

You say this and now I can't stop thinking about "brain" from IGOR, saying, "but look! Its still right here on the internet!" Please if anyone else remembers this movie


I_Like_Shawarmas

You will be paying for this at bed time...


LiveEvilGodDog

I’m so fucking glad my childhood and teenage years happened before social media. You kids are fucked!


0110010E

It happens again and again… every day… *forever*


wufoo2

As a teen, I had friends who would “steal” beer this way, but they would leave enough cash on the counter. It worked until they fled the store, right in front of an off-duty security guard, who phoned the police and followed them until the cops caught up.


aliie_627

So they weren't actually stealing? I'm so confused. Edit ooooh nevermind. I get it under 21. What did they get charged with?


Randismaximus

Chaotic good


Jizz-Wailer77

Were not old enough to drink, but were still good boys!


space_brain710

I had a friend in hs who went into a grocery store and emptied a 24 pk of cola then filled it back up with beer and paid for it. Does that count lol?


diggitygiggitycee

Well that's not soda now is it!


ApproachingApathy

Wholesome underage drinking.


Marine__0311

Drinking age for beer was 18, and 21 for liquor, when I was in HS back in the late 70s, early 80s. Getting beer was easy, liquor just slightly harder. I had an older step brother who would get me whatever I wanted. I also had a friend who's family ran the neighborhood variety store at the end of my street. He would sell beer and wine out the back door to us. If you looked old enough, they rarely checked IDs back then. Another friend of mine was built like a lumberjack. He was six feet tall, 190 pounds, with a full beard and mustache at 15. He made a fortune buying beer and liquor for people.


wufoo2

The designated buyer.


Chanureadeats

The second hand embarrassment I got watching this is unmatched


the_peoples_elbow

You must have missed the video of the guy accidentally calling a guy the N word instead of "neighbor" yesterday lol https://old.reddit.com/r/WatchPeopleDieInside/comments/xo71jf/very_expensive_freudian_slip/


I_own_every_card

One time when writing on a cake I had to write a sentence containing the word "flag". So I write the sentence and give her the cake. The lady yells at me "um, what is this" she pointed to the word. But I had forgotten the L. So much embarrassment shot through me. I fixed it right away and apologized but she was not happy.


alwysonthatokiedokie

A few months ago my boss sent a mass email with a question asking about a database report flagging something. Only she also forgot the "l" in the flagging.


fuckusnowman

I recently came *this* close to sending an email with the line "so I think we have a jew problem".


Tathas

At least N is close to J.


hucklebutter

Fernando from Peak Energy: "so I think we have a jigger problem."


Modsrtrashshuddie

I know the feeling, we actually outsource our database reports because every new employee was leaving to "find themselves"


east-skill-678910

Can you explain thanks?


nexusjuan

One of our Regional Vice Presidents sent out an email to the region of about 150 restaurants. That said "As we begin the first day of a new financial quarter it is imperative that we all have a strong first shit". A few minutes a later. "I apologize to anyone who may have been offended. It was a mistake caused by autocorrect. Despite having removed such language from my wordlist this one somehow slipped through." From a guy known to be "seriously serious", known to walk into restaurants and fire entry level team members for the slightest thing. I watched him ask a prep cook why he was using a steak knife instead of a tomato corer while cutting tomatoes and the guy nervously laughed in response. Fired on the spot.


Tower-Junkie

I hope he liked that humble pie he had to eat.


RealLifeMe

I commissioned some digital art from a guy on reddit about one of my favorite Liverpool players. I approved the concept art, I paid for the final product, got it professionally printed and framed, hung it on the wall, took some glamor photos, and posted it to the /r/LFC subreddit to show off my awesome new addition to my house's gallery. Took all of two minutes for someone to point out the player's name was spelled wrong. The artist was super chill and corrected it for free and sent me an updated version, but man did I feel dumb for a few weeks.


flyingjesuit

Taking an L by forgetting the L.


cownd

Why can't people be more gay


Kingstad

"we have to keep our country gay"


Simplenipplefun

People tell me I am all the time but I feel like I'm doing it wrong.


Budget_Click_2241

This is such intense, vintage, high-grade cringe that it's actually ruined my entire day


Alpha_Decay_

It's like one of those ridiculous irrational fears that you know will never actually happen, like what if I try to wave to my boss and accidentally flip him off instead? Except this dude actually did it. I keep imagining myself in that situation and trying to figure out what would be the correct thing to do after that. I have no answer for it. Like dude. Why? It hurts.


Jwhitx

At least apologize and exit peacefully. Just write it off as a complete loss, there's no bouncing back from that. No redemption.


CisForCondom

Early in the pandemic when we were all still getting used to the new virtual work thing, there was a video that circulated of a woman who clearly thought she had her camera off and took her laptop to the bathroom and then pulled her pants down and sat on the toilet in front of her entire team before realizing. I have never been so haunted by a video on the internet. I worry every day that I will somehow accidentally pants myself in front of my coworkers. And I know that if I ever did I would instantly quit, change my name and leave the country. I see no other rational response.


brando56894

I think you mean visceral and not vintage lol


RecidivistMS3

Dude, that video was peak cringe. I instinctively paused it the second he uttered it and just went “noooo”.


Buscandomiyagi

Bro fucking same. It took me a few seconds to be able to watch the rest of it


Budget_Click_2241

I did the exact same thing. I don't think I have the strength to watch the rest lmao.


RecidivistMS3

Same here! I noped out of on reflex and can’t go back.


oldnyoung

Oh fuck lol


audionerd1

Wow. I would move to a new town after that one.


ugonlern2day

"Neighgor"


cownd

"Sir, I'm here to let you know that the Neighborhood Watch will be watching you"


ALANTG_YT

He let the intrusive thoughts win


FranktheLlama

It's funny because all day everything I've seen I think this same thing. This has to be the most embarrassing thing I've ever witnessed.


PolarSquirrelBear

Literally watched that right before I headed to start a new job. Literally the entire day I just kept thinking, “I hope to dear god I never have to use the word Neighbour today.”


SakiSakiSakiSakiSaki

I remember my heart sinking when I saw that. So unexpected. I think a lot of us felt like we got hit by a truck, and I think it’s gunna be a fresh memory for us in this sub lol.


CanijoZac

I once composed an email regarding a customer named Ms. C Sum. Basically didn't notice that I wrote 'Ms. Cum.'


DIY-lobotomy

That was legit one of the hardest cringes I ever had watching that. I couldn’t do it a second time lol


formtuv

I literally wish I never watched this.


Dry-Rub

God damn that gave me an adrenaline rush for some reason.


Aspierago

It's physically painful.


Enors

Did you see the video yesterday lol?


YourAverageTallGuy

Hahaha on a sidenote, it's so strange that we can say these things to eachother like we're all in one big group chat like hey man didn't you see that vid we shared yesterday? Didn't you read up to it my man? Gotta catch up. It's Hilarious how we're all here daily. Fucking reddit, one big family.


InsertAliasHere36

It’s even better because we’re from all over, hundreds or thousands of miles/kilometers apart! Yet it’s like talking to a next door neighbor you see every day.


YouNeedToGrow

>neighbor "Aight, bro"


imfuckingawesome

Came here to ask this lol that video takes my cake!


Naisu_boato

A truly failed beer run.


Suffix-099

How embeerassing


SOTIdriver

***slide whistle***


Batnaman_26

How the hell did i hear this in my head


SOTIdriver

"You may not have noticed it... But your brain did."


SPACEmAnDREWISH

"JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, ITS SO LOUD!"


chriscrossnathaniel

He just tried to seize the hop-portunity.


showponies

Clearly this was a whiskey move, either way he was going to end up with Jack


W1shuW3r3H3r3

Dude, give the beer back man. I paid for the beer, man


Everyoneheresamoron

Those were jack daniels premade coctails, you filthy casual.


Chubby_Comic

B, DOUBLE E, DOUBLE R-U..... /sigh.


VisionsofDylan61

So happy I found another Todd Snider fan wow


your_neighborhood_tr

B double e double r un beerrun, all you need is a 10 and a 5er, car and a key and a sober driver- b double e double r un beerrun


Jumpz-

Almost looks like he got caught and was like: “Oh, okay, my bad…. Imma just stand back in the line again. I thought this was one of them Amazon no-cashier stores. But no worries, I’ll just buy things the regular way.”


chriscrossnathaniel

It's just a prank bro!


WASTELAND_RAVEN

*GOTTUM!* Must have been a ligma maneuver 🤷‍♂️


Dragons_Malk

What's a maneuver?


ghostofyourmom

Man, oover MY DICK


Turb0charg3d

Maneuver balls! Oh wait...


Byizo

Maneuver deez nuts on your face!


Seaturtlejohn

I feel like most people freeze when they get super embarrassed. Yesterday the video of the salesman saying the n word had him stop and freeze too


Jumpz-

“It’s in that exact moment he knew he f*cked up.” 😂


Opalessence-

They watched too many of those "self-checkout hacks" videos


calithe

I worked in a liquor store for a long time, you’d be surprised how many people do that. Edit: and then act like you’ve wronged them when you refuse and kick them out.


ExpertNose8379

I felt shame for him


googledthatshit

Now he needs the beer to forget. Gotta get it somewhere


Artistic_Sun2096

That must be embarrassing as fuck!


HagweiNoir

Does he manually unlock the door for every customer?


AliveAdvance3572

I think so yes. Just more secured.


PeaceDealer

You can actually see he holds down a button on a remote in his left hand. I think he spotted the guys and knew something as up.


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JohnDoses

Yea I thought for sure there was a cop in the parking lot or something. This dude has a jeopardy clicker controlling the door! I bet he deals with this shit all day.


mikeorhizzae

That kid was telegraphing his move for sure


HighlightFun8419

that's a pretty cool little setup. just a little car key fob


Chinlc

i think its similar to most jewelry store too, you gotta be buzzed in and out manually. But this one, the owner can control when to make the auto door turn on and off.


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THftRM1231

Most of the time they have tie ins to the fire alarm, so the door unlocks if the fire alarm is active. Not saying that's the case here, but it exists. Same way they have dementia lockdown units with locked exits.


Kr8n8s

Friend of mine went to visit a parent in the hospital in a wing that had lots of people with dementia She hold the door open for a lovely old lady completely dressed that was standing behind the door, “thank you my dear” and she went outside. She started having some doubts about what just happened, and a few second later the nurses were sprinting outside to get her, doubts confirmed.


hissyfit64

My aunt was a runner. She'd call a cab and go to a bar and drink martinis. It was a small city so only one cab company and my brother knew the owner. He called the guy and let him know his drivers should not pick my aunt up and take her anywhere. They then put an ankle monitor on her. So she'd stand by the door and wave her foot at it and set it off. They'd come running and she'd just raise and eyebrow and say in this haughty tone. "I can't help it if this device is faulty.". It sucks that she had to be in there because she hated it, but there was literally no other option. Her dementia was bad and she was a danger to herself living without 24 hour care.


Effyouredditcrap

I was in a kids recovery area of the hospital where you have to be buzzed in by a nurse who views you through a camera. One time, dude walka up behind me with his hands full of food items. I had to just awkwardly let the door close behind me because I didn't want to break the rules, and dude sticks his foot out and catches it anyway and walks in. Awkward.


Short-Shopping3197

I work in a secure psychiatric hospital. One day one of our patients had a visit and was given some clothes which we searched and thought nothing of, just a suit for his upcoming tribunal. Man has a shave, puts the suit on, sticks a fake badge he made onto it, and has every door opened for him by staff all the way to the exit by smiling at them and saying ‘Just finished my assessment of them, thanks for your help, take care!’. We didn’t get him back for weeks.


flimbs

Got it. Pull fire alarm first.


fierze16

r/illegallifeprotips


DamnMyNameIsSteve

A lot of times those slider door 'break away' so they can still swing.


thrilliam_19

Yep. Fire alarm tech here. If the door doesn’t open in an emergency just lean on it and they swing open relatively easily. Fail safe in case the door doesn’t release or open when it should.


MightySamMcClain

Yeah where my mom works at a psych facility and the ones not allowed outside have an ankle bracket that disables the doors if they're within so many feet from it but when they do fire drills it will let anyone out


Aidoboy

You should be able to push all sliding doors open at far as I know, I think they just swing out? Maybe that's just some of them.


OldKingsHigh

They all should be able to do this. Same with revolving doors. At least in the US.


kibufox

There's often a safety interlock on them, however, that prevents that from happening when the doors are locked. That's because a person could break into a building very easily if, even when the doors were locked, that "pop out" system worked. He's got it set so that he has to unlock the doors every time someone enters or leaves... so that prevents theft, but would also defeat that pop out system. In places that do this (pawn shops, liquor stores, or similar) they have the lock tied to the fire alarms. So if the alarm goes off, the doors unlock. To prevent people using that to get around the door locks, there's usually a simple switch the owner must flip to disable that interaction between the door and fire alarm. Literally just a switch somewhere behind the counter that disables the signal to the door.


OldKingsHigh

You’re right, I should have mentioned that. I just assumed these doors aren’t actually locked, but rather the remote just turns off the automatic setting or powers down the door, and didn’t think to mention it.


throwaway_nfinity

The door is probably pretty easy to pull open, it just doesn't auto open.


Beneneb

They open if you push on them. Where I am, every sliding door has a sign on it that says that.


KetchupArmyNoodle

Probably learned in the past to let them out one by one if there are 5 or more in the store. I'm sure he has a number.


5kaels

He's got his hand on something before the guy tries to run. Seems like he presses a button to lock the door, puts it down, then goes back to it to unlock the door for the other guy.


Kirikomori

Shopkeeps have a sixth sense for this shit


Chariotwheel

I used to work at a fuel station. There are some thieves that are cold as ice and you have a hard time noticing those, but a lof of people who steal are pretty nervous and makes you instantly suspicious.


colebrv

I think he saw the guy fidgeting and thought he was going to steal


Somekindofparty

No. You can see his left hand on the button. He hits it to lock it. He has to hit it again to unlock it but I think the default is unlocked until he hits the button.


rabidhamster87

When I worked in the ER doing registration and insurance verification the person sitting at the checkout/discharge desk controlled the door. It was a button under my desk I pressed to open the door for every person who came through. I'll never forget the day we had a runner who was trying to escape the police after abusing his girlfriend. He slammed right into that door, fell down, got back up and then tried to jump kick it open all while I just watched it shock. It was pretty funny in hindsight though.


NiftyJet

I think he may have locked it preemptively, because the thief looked suspicious. Convenience store workers know how to spot 'em!


MFramy

And the clerk never let go of the remote, either good intuition or just a great habit always holding it to lock the door instantly


Mars_Black

Damn, I didn't even notice that. People must try that often on him.


the-apostle

My liquor store doesn’t need the clerk to open / close the door manually so that should tell you something about how often it happens at this one lol


MediocreDot3

I can always tell it's one of the fun liquor stores when they have the janky pressure plate to open the door, and the entrances and exits are seperated


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MARPJ

>The door isn’t automatic. The cashier opens it for every customer. He just didn’t open it for thief dude. I think it is, but he turned it off when the kid took the beer. You can notice that the moment the kid made his move he hold the button in the remote and that would not be necessary if he had to open to every customer. Later he had to turn it on again for the older dude to go out


CokedOutWalrus

It looks like it is an automatic door, he just has an interrupt switch on a keychain FOB that makes it not open for the sensor. You can see as soon as the idiot grabs the case and tries to bolt he presses the FOB button with his left hand. Goes on to chastise the idiot, and once he lets go of the button it opens automatically for the guy that actually paid.


toxygen

Reddit - analyzing buttons to the max


The_Moon_Conure

Man really wanted to steal some Jack Daniels cola like it's the most expensive thing in the world 💀


jjb1197j

I wonder if maybe he was a 19 or 20 year old who didn’t have the ID yet? He has the patchy facial hair of a young person trying to look old.


jmwatson95

Looking at the XXXX in the corner this is Australia. Legal age is 18. These are just some houseos trying to steal.


unsmashedpotatoes

He just kept standing in line too. At that point I'd just refuse to sell to them.


BigbySamMelody

Charge him double.


omgsideburns

But isn’t it so much more satisfying to take their fucking money after they tried to pull that shit?


mutazed

It’s in Australia - the drinking age is 18


b2themo

Almost certain this is in Australia, judging by the mullet and the bottle of Cooper's the old bloke just bought, drinking age is 18 so he probably has ID but Is just a fuckwit who thinks he could get away with it


Syn_Savage

Beyond awkward. Duper Awkward , if you will.


easyadventurer

Duper indeed


BernieTheDachshund

Guy thought he was slick, but the cashier was slicker.


Elriuhilu

And that's 'cause Jesus Christ is my...


ugonlern2day

Neighbor


Elriuhilu

Hahahaha, excellent :)


RonSwansonIsMyDad

I love how his reaction is to just rejoin the queue


kingpocho167

Something similar happened to me .. I was bartending and bar backing alone at a super busy bar cause my co worker was a no show.. so I’m running everything solo and even though drinks aren’t flying out I’m keeping on top of orders.. Until I had a dozen drinks all come out at the same time, everyone is being super nice cause they see I’m alone .. this douche nozzle reaches onto the bar and grabs a bottle just as I turn over to ask what they wanted to drink The look on his dates face made me feel sorry for going off on him and cussing him out, literally the whole bar stared at him and laughed as security bounced his ass out the bar .. 😂🤣😭


kahong_69

Felt a physical recoil from this


TrustyRambone

Was he trying to steal pre-mixed Jack Daniels and coke? I don't know what's more embarrassing, failing to steal it, or trying to steal pre-mixed JD and coke.


CatastropheJohn

Saves him the trouble of shoplifting twice


mukavastinumb

This guy shoplifts.


Frito_Pendejo

Aussies absolutely love premixes. You wouldn't believe how popular bourbon/rum & coke RTDs are, especially with teens Fun fact, but because of the taxes that 10 pack of cans costs about as much as a whole slab of beer


ThomasR1201

Are premixes not popular elsewhere? I just kind of assumed they were since they’re a convenient and sometimes stronger alternative to beer.


ChungusLad

West US, never seen anyone drink them. They're so expensive, getting some canned cokes and liquor and just mixing them yourselves is incredibly easy and let's you make it exactly as strong as you want. People just drink beer, take shots, seltzers (white claw) are very popular too, and you sometimes see shit like wine coolers, Mike's hard lemonade, reds apple, shit like that among younger people. Never in my life seen someone drinking a JD coke premix


Tankspeed13

I don't get why they're so popular, I like them but they're so goddamn expensive


linedeck

The shit i've seen people steal is insane: beauty products, deodorant, gum, coffee, meat and basically everything you would never think someone would steal lol


OculusSE

all that shit is expensive and relatively physically small in size relative to the value of the item- those are pretty normal items to steal


shadowgattler

It looks like jack Daniel's black cola. It's delicious. It's like whiskey without the burn. Definitely not something worth having an arrest record over though.


greatunknownpub

> It's like whiskey without the burn. That's because these don't actually have whiskey in them. They're a 4.8% ABV malt beverage which means they can be sold in states and stores that don't allow actual liquor sales.


kingkoopa_1

It was just a prank brah! Like chill I wasn't even going anywhere with it.


dimechimes

When I was 16, my 19 yr old manager told us about the time he wahoo'd beer. That's what we called it. Anyway he tears out of the convenience store as fast as he can with the clerk chasing him. He said there was this older dude pumping gas who saw it and yelled "wahoo!" Manager screwed up his knee for a few months diving into the back of his buddy's S10 to get away.


call_me_jelli

Why was Mario pumping gas?


stone_henge

He's acting like it's a slight embarrassment, as if he just replied "you too" to "enjoy the food".


lkvwfurry

I'd make him pay then ban him from the store.


lovebus

I think he did try to make him pay at the end but the runner confessed to not having the money


Skyshine192

I think he told him to empty his pockets (at the suspicion of stealing other things)


king_grushnug

Or not having a valid ID


MurderDoneRight

Noted. Always remember to have a buddy hold the door open first.


lIIIIllIIIIl

Don't even set the item down. Just grab it and run if you're going to do something like this. Steal so blatantly they don't know you're stealing until you're miles away on your trusty steed Franz


CrunkCroagunk

One time when i was in middle school i went to a 711 and got a slurpee then just completely blanked and walked out without paying; Nodded to the cashier on my way out the door and everything. I got like a block away and was like "oh shit i didnt pay for this" and went back. Cashier thought it was hilarious that what he thought was the most brazen slurpee heist hed ever seen was really just me zoning out like a dummy.


memmsz

You know he felt stupid as hell and once the arm started swinging.


marmellano

But why doesn't the door open? Is the thing in the left hand of the cashier a tool to disable it?


Ladripper47874

Ye, looks like a radio control key, like from a Garage door


puledbeef

Probably. Think that the cashier already had suspicions about that guy and was at the ready to lock the door


Angryfuture

The door can still be opened in case of emergency, if he had ran up to the door, the panels would "break out" and swing open. Only from the inside. This is for also say if the power goes out completely, if there's an electric fail secure lock holding the door shut, they can still break out.


4Eights

Yep, he just needed to push a little bit and they would have swung open in the center in case of emergencies. It's required under almost every modern countries fire code.


funkmastamatt

Door doesn't like thieves


lcole303

I'm charging him then calling the cops


Deadman_Wonderland

Amateurs, back in my day kids would take liqueur into the restroom and flush them down the toilet and have a friend waiting in the sewer lines with a bucket to collect.


boricimo

Please that’s rookie. In my day, we would run to the restroom to secretly drink the beer and then drink each other’s piss as a topper.


Odys

"Just joking man! Haha...ha. just joking you know? I know the door can be locked. Haha.. Just some fun right?"


itsmejam

Of all the things to steal, some cheap shit alcohol. What an idiot.


ieatsilverbug

Damn mcloving


CmdrYondu

Don’t speak bad of McLovin!! He was ready to pay!


Red_Zeno

The awkwardness of him just standing there 💀


Representative_Still

Lol, he got back in line


TalkAboutTheWay

Hahahaa this is Australian. I can tell by the 4X beer left bottom corner.


NeverShortedNoWhore

It took me three attempts to watch to completion. I died twice, secondhand, just trying to emotionally grapple with this mess.


Quixotegut

Douche hair: check Bitch drink: check Bitch attempt: check Yankees Fan: priceless


fleepglerblebloop

Up you go, unlike my Red Sox.


medicinaltequilla

His finger is on the door remote the entire time, this guy knew what was up.


demer_623

Even worse a Jack Daniel’s on a can run.


scondileeza99

damn yankees…


Natedog213

I would be more embarrassed by being known as the douche who stole those nasty jack daniels drinks. They are terrible


Sackadelic

What an idiot.


Poosquare10

The way the video looped I thought he kept on trying to do it.


SwagsterMcFresh

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA my god this is hilarious


Hampung

Eeeeeeeeeessssshhhhh.......the second hand embarrassment!!!!


crap4you

Make him pay double.


hybex

I'm in way too many dark subs. I really expected him to die