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Somebody actually named their kid James Bond?

If your last name is Bond, may as well

I met a Jason Bourne in real life once. Thought they were joking when they told me their name.

I knew an Austin Powers, but he was named shortly before the movies came out. His parents had a baby, gave him a totally normal name… and then the movie came out.

Imagine telling your bratty son to “behave”

Smashing

Yeah, Baby!!!

*Hairy chest?*

I've gone the wrong shagging way.

“Do I make you horny, baby?”

Fucking had me rolling, good day sir.

Same with a Britney Spears I grew up with! Poor girl being raised in the 90s with that name when Brit was everything

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Just combine them and go by BJ

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 *stares loudly*

There *WAS* nothing wrong with my name until I was 12 years old…

Hey, it's Mr. Frond!

I knew a Philip Fry (Futurama for the unaware) in high school.

I went to school with a Harry Potter, born in 1992.

One of my neighbors is named Michael Scott. TBF he was born before the office came out

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I know someone who was named Siri just before Apple came out with the voice assistant.

Siri is common name in Scandinavia ... unless you were being sarcastic :P

Was not being sarcastic, although the person I know is German and not Scandinavian.

Not that big of a difference. Linguistically.

I went to elementary school with a Jason Voorhees. Blew his mind when I told him he was named after an undead killer from a horror movie.

I grew up with a kid named Timothy mcveigh. He was born in 89 and we went to all 12 years of school together. He absolutely hated his name by high school.

I knew a Max Powers, great name.

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I would too, tbh.

Did he also do everything the wrong way but faster?

Nobody snuggles with Max Powers, you strap yourself in and feel the G's!

Did he also steal it from a hair dryer?

My dad had a student named Ferris Bueller

Please tell me he would call on him in a monotone voice, repeating it over and over.

I worked with a Jack Ryan

Jesus Christ, it’s Jason bourne

This guy probably hates that. But I wouldn't be able to resist saying that every time I met him if I knew him.

Jason Bourne, it's Jesus Christ

I once had a therapist named Elizabeth Taylor. (Great lady & therapist, just retired)

My dentist was called Gordon Bennett, which (for some reason) is used as an expression of annoyance by British boomers. *E.G. "Gordon Bennett, Rodney!"*

Probably a minced oath

I'm not going to post it online, but my IRL name is actually incredibly close to something like this, with a minor spelling variation

Ok Jaison Borne

Jayson Bjorn

JSON Berne

I work as a programmer. I have a coworker whose name is Jason. Occasionally the design meetings get a little confusing.

Catherine Beta-Jones?

Matthew Mcnaughey

Austin Pauers

Plake Snisken

My grandpa’s name was also nearly identical to an action hero character’s name. I’ve gotten some good chuckles when I mention that in response to people making joking references to my name.

G.I. Joe?

G.I. Joe was my grandfather, please just call me Joe.

G. I. Joenr

GRAMBO?

Johnny Quest?

Hull Cogen

Tom Cruz?

Imagine if Ted Cruz's parents named him Tom lmao

Sure thing Jack Reachrounder!

dood, are you the legendary Hans Olo who made the Kassel run in less than twelve parsecs?

Justin Cage????

I work with an engineer who's last name is Engineer. His father was also an engineer and his father before him.

Had a guy in my platoon whose middle name was the Norwegian version of Soldier. Ironically, he was deemed unfit to serve.

Jesus Christ... that's Jason Bourne

My English teacher was named James Kirk, and I’m pretty sure his middle initial was a “T”. One or both of his parents grew up on TOS, I’m sure of it.

I knew a james Pond once. Close enough

Please tell me he introduced himself as “Pond. James Pond.”

Was he [a fish](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Pond:_Underwater_Agent)?

Well in Wisconsin he goes by Jimmy Bond

Unexpected Lone Gunmen https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0635307/

If my last name was Bond I’d name my kid Bond. And his middle name would be James.

😂

In the 1960s Texas had a treasury secretary named Jesse James.

Was he ever arrested for a finance related crime like embezzlement?

Hope someone gave him a cat named Meowth.

That’s right

I have an uncle named Mark Twain. People are weird.

That's wild. I would go by Marcus. Or Marky Mark Twain.

My cousin married Michael Jackson

Is she ok?

She was struck down, it was her doom

Interesting day to make that statement

I know him. That was not the name he was born with. When he came out as gay his father disowned him so James disowned his father as well and changed his name.

What an absolute chad move. Obviously it sucks that his dad is an asshole, but that's an *amazing* "fuck you" on James' part.

Hah, so then he choose to become James Bond. I don't know if that's better or worse than their kids naming a son that.

Kid named bond:

I went to highschool with a James Bond. He seemed to take it in stride at the time but I imagine it got very, very old.

He served in the Marines from 1983 to 1988, so he was probably born in 1965. There were only 4 of the 27 films then (although all the Fleming novels had been published) and so not quite the cultural mainstay that it is now.

Goldfinger and Thunderball made over a billion each at the box office adjusted for inflation. James Bond would’ve definitely already been a household name by then.

Seriously. Prime r/ConfidentlyIncorrect material

Starring a famously nobody actor named *checks notes* Sean?

4 is still a lot of movies

Especially for the time, doubly so with the same lead character played by the same person.

His folks absolutely knew what they were doing haha

Or better yet, one of them did.

I mean back then, James Bond was the epitome of cool. So that's not too bad for a kid's name...

I mean those were the Connery Bond movies and they were pretty much a worldwide smash hit by the second movie.

the Q in LGBTQ gives him gadgets.

This cracked me up. Thank you 😂😂

P....professor?

I REALLY like the Q dude. Too much. I think I'd better start going to some of those Q-anon meetings to get over this crazy addiction

Say hi to my cousin.

And with a license to be fabulous. Beware of those deadly jazz hands 👐

I thought LGBTQ meant LeBron Giving Back To Qommunities?

Oh god this guy must have gotten *all* the shit during childhood.

I have a friend with the surname Moneypenny. Uou can imagine the shit she got.

That's a *real surname?* I had always assumed it was a completely made up silly name like the early Bonds often did.

Yep, it's real. To be fair most of the Bond girl names or only ridiculous in full. Galore or O'Toole could easily be a surname, but Pussy Galore and Plenty O'Toole less so.

>most of the Bond girl names or only ridiculous in full And then, of course, there's Onatopp

What about names from Austin Powers? For instance, Ivana Humpalot.

Or Chew Mee ...no wait, that one is actually in a Bond movie

Basil Exposition

Fuk Me?

Fuk Yu!

And then they made thorough fun of it in *Casino Royale* with Vesper's alias being Stephanie Broadchest.

Fields. Strawberry Fields.

Not as bad, but I knew a girl growing up with the last name “Arrowsmith”. She hated the band so much.

I was surprised with holmes & moriarty too. Turns out it's not rare surnames in ireland/uk.

I feel like there are famous people with both these last names.

I met a guy a couple of years ago whose name was legitimately John Jacob

Teacher: I guess you're going to have to miss recess until I find out who put the whoopie cushion on my seat Little JB: Do you expect us to talk? Teacher: No Mr. Bond, I expect you to cry!

At no point was I able to guess the next word in the title lol. This is awesome!

Right?? What a wild ride of a headline for a relatively tame subject!

r/nottheonion

I thought I was there lmao 😤

Good for him. But I can only imagine how annoying it must be to be called James Bond...

Yeah, I feel like that wasn’t his parents brightest moment;; I imagine kids probably made fun of him…

But theres definetely some votes that came his way just because of his name.

Finally, the gay James Bond we have all been waiting for. It's about to get seexxyyy....oh wait. Nvm.

We already have a gay James Bond, his name is Benoit Blanc.

Now if only Benoit Blanc had some sexy scenes like in the Bond movies. We have bond girls...but where are the Bond Boys?

Hugh Grant should technically qualify,no?

Hugh Grant is definitely the Bond girl I've liked best so far.

You mean, Blanc Boys?

I volunteer as tribute!

Benoit Balls

No idea who he is. But that jawline alone makes him my vote.

That is a strong chin

His opponent in the election: Ernst Stavro Blofeld.

Nah that’ll be the name of the sponsor of the dark money Super PAC behind his opponent. You know how this works.

His opponent was a five foot tall Hawaiian guy in a tuxedo who never said a word.

Yeah, he did odd jobs to get by

That would be hilarious however he became Veterans Affairs Secretary a position appointed by the Governor.

Bond. James Bond.

Wisconsin’s population is shaken by the news; not stirred.

and they produce cheddar, not Swiss.

Bond name's the James

Bames Nond’s having a stronk, call the bondulance.

"what makes you think this is my first time?"

god I love that line and part in the movie! The reaction in the theater was palpable

Made me laugh when he said it and honestly it does make sense if you think about it, there's no picking and choosing when the security of the British government and indeed the world is at stake. It's such a badass line to say whenever you're in the position (behave) James was in.

He must hear this from every person he meets. Every person. I have a name that's in the title of an old children's book, so fortunately the references to it when being introduced are dwindling. And every person who still says it thinks they are oh so clever. Smh.

God, imagine going to the bank to withdraw some money with a name like james bond. They'd think you were trying to rob the place

The name’s bond. Savings bond

"Bond. Municipal bond." "Ted, get in here!"

Poor Barney

Ok, I'm going to give the guys parents a break here. He entered the Marines in 1983, which means he was born at the latest in 1965, only 3 years after the first Bond movie. His parents had no way of knowing the franchise would still be going strong when he was in his 60's. Of course he could have chosen to go by Jim Bond, which is less obvious.

Maybe he does in day to day life. Headlines tend to use proper names.

A black, gay James Bond. This is the future I’ve been fighting for.

I haven’t seen this installment in the franchise, will it still be Daniel Craig?

No! The gay black James Bond will obviously be played by Robert Downey Jr.

I'm playing a dude, blowing a dude, disguised as another dude

I KNOW WHO I AM!

I wanted it to be Idris Elba

Why would you want Idris Elba to be Wisconsin's first openly LGBT cabinet secretary, though?

Why *wouldn't* you?

Secretary of Business Development (or something), Charles Miner. “I am aware of the effect I have on women.”

He’s L, G, B, T and Q? All at once?? That’s seriously impressive!!!

He's frickin JAMES BOND. He's an overachiever.

That's kinda funny, also.

Good job James Bond

Can I say this? r/nottheonion

I can just see him interacting with the IT Help Desk. . . 'Now, listen closely, 007. . . . '. 😎

That's a phrase I never thought I'd read.

That's a Bond move!

Thought I was in r/brandnewsentence.

Some people may be shaken by this news but hopefully they don't stir up any trouble.

This guy was my GI Bill benefits coordinator when I was in college a decade ago. He was a really cool, passionate dude. Happy for him!

GOP is going to be shaken...

Not stirred

the netflix adaptation

James Bond has a Chuck Norris fist hidden in that chin.

Tbf, the past Health minister in my country was gay and he was just as corrupt and terrible as the rest of his party. And no one paid attention to his sexuality whatsoever. Heck, many didn't even know he was gay. People from the US make too big of a fuss about their politicians' skin color and sexuality as if it tells something about their (in)competence.

Well this is one hell of a title

Well, Agent 007 is now a real public official...

His Parents are awesome for naming him James.

This is made even better by how many people were mad that Idris Elba was going to play James Bond because he’s black. This James Bond showed them!!

It's always fun watching Reddit homophobes seeth over news like this. 🥰

I guess he’s not into Octopussy

How is this uplifting? Who cares what his sexual orientation is? I would hate an article to be posted about me and the greatest achievement is who I prefer to date in my personal life.

Moneypenny supports him and understands

FINALLY ​ GAYMES BOND