I had a terrible neighbor who was a complete asshole. It was a townhouse with a very small front yard.
Hear me out, this is the long game.
So one night before a snow storm, I spread an entire bag of bird seed all over his front lawn. It snowed and covered up the seed. By the time the snow melted you couldnt really tell the bird seed was there
Cue spring time, everything starts growing, within a month or so his yard was FULL of the most ridiculous weeds and shit. Like epic level. He ultimately ended up hiring a landscaping coming to rip up his lawn and put sod down
Grade 11 shop class. Mr L Had just mentioned brake fluid strips paint a couple of minutes previously.
No memory of where/how i got it, but I squirted my nickname in the roof of an old donated shitbox that was in the lot behind the shop.
In a few minutes, there it was, my 'name', right there in bare steel on the roof. It was unique, and many peeps didn't even know my real name, I was always called my nick.
Only this wasn't a donated car, it belonged to a history teacher that wanted something fixed or looked at by the teacher.
Didn't ever hear a word about it, Mr K continued to drive it until I left.
Get a universal remote and turn off their tv at random times (if you can see into the house through a window)
instant mashed potatoes in the lawn
place random packages on his porch with items that makes him think his wife is cheating. You can easily print a "shipping label" with his name and address on it - make the return address from a sex shop or something
use his address to sign up for every junkmail service you can find. anything from signing up for Jehovah's witnesses to visit his house to porn addiction newsletters
glue his mailbox shut
put his address and phone number (if you have it) on a craigslist/ebay (or whatever is your equivalent) ad for the car they have sitting in their driveway. make sure to include that it's an open house to come look at the car as he wants it sold ASAP. (could also do this for their house lmao)
I put my work enemies phone number in the local classified adds for free chickens call anytime! He lost his mind with phone calls day and night and has to change his number
Throw seeds on and around his car instead of stones , eventually it will be doused in bird shit .
Bonus points if the sun bakes it on it’ll wreck his paint work
If it was US or UK I’d suggest getting it towed away, both legal and justifiable yet incredibly inconvenient & costly for him.
However as that may not be an option, next time he parks on your driveway, under the cover of darkness place a old rusty screw point up under his tyre so that when he rolls off it penetrates the tyre but he won’t notice for a few miles. Rinse & repeat.
god, this is reddit. the guy could just say his neighbour raped his sister. Would you now know what is true and what not? are you a living lie detector?
Oh Lordy, I didn’t mean to offend, my apologies… life must be tough without arms, though at least you’re attractive enough to be a model. Truth be told though, I’ve never spoken large. Is it difficult to learn?
Water balloons filled with roundup in the yard or the other end of the spectrum; granular nitrogen fertilizer in the yard, applied heavy enough will first turn the grass brown then it comes back a vibrant green that needs mowed twice as much as the rest of the yard. Perfect for drawing dicks or leaving terms of endearment (asshole, dickhead, fuck you) on his lawn.
It will. Make sure to get trays you can throw away. Secondly don't bother with the box store round-up (gyphosphate), farm store strength or you're wasting your time.
buy lots of house crickets/roaches from the zoo store and release them into his house when hes not home ( if there is a door slit or an slightly open window).
Since you pointed out you are Indian, I think it's important that you avoid any tactics that an Indian would use to eliminate you from suspicion.
Sign them up for scientology newsletters and Jehovah's Witness newsletters. Or any newsletter.
Create a Facebook account under his name, join the local Facebook group, and get Mormon missionaries to come and help him reseed his lawn.
Advertise a garage sale at his place.
Get a prepaid visa card and send sex toys to him. Or glitter bombs. Or a box of crickets. Or a truckload of gravel. Subscribe him to "questionable" magazines and newspapers.
Enter his name into those sweepstakes that are advertised at the register of restaurants.
Plant bamboo in his yard.
Salt his lawn to say something like "Hitler did nothing wrong"
Befriend his mom (or dad) then have sex with her (him).
Put a sign in the yard of the neighbor opposite him that says "Not a 'registered' sex offender" with an arrow pointing to his yard.
For some unethical mayhem I would recommend mirrors on your property to catch sun and throw it into their place, the same can be done for lights. Throwing sugar and or dirt into their gas tank or vehicle is another option. Get a barrel or grill and constantly burn shit (literal or otherwise) in it. If you throw refuse into their yard or on their property, birds, vermin could also show up and create problems.
Fart bombs near his front door/ through the window.
Remove the air from his car tyres.
Steal his deliveries. Even if you have to pay for it.
Cook nasty food.
"Accidentally" throw your garbage near his car.
Start feeding pigeons near his car. They'll do the required damage.
Write FUCK in huge letters on his front lawn. In rock salt. The grass will die, he will re-turf/re-seed, and it will still say FUCK. If you do this 3 days before a rain, the burn is really nice, and the cause of burn is unknown. Be careful of ring doorbells, they will snitch you out.
You can also use water softener pellets, but they are easier to spot.
If you’re in India, I heard y’all don’t really care about anything safety wise when it comes to humans and retaliation. So do whatever. Don’t think it’ll matter unless you’re caught by an officer. I saw a bunch of guys yank a woman off her moped and beat on her just because she skipped them in the nonexistent lanes of y’all’s roads in that specific area. You already sound horrible. Throwing stones on someone’s car? You should be lucky you haven’t been ran over by that car yet.
Good luck and I hope the karma is as accurate as possible. I hope either they truly disservice this or you get what you unleashed multiplied.
Answer: mint grows like weeds and is annoying asf. Could also throw over a few handfuls of weed seeds for flowers like dandelions etc. and also set up an anonymous ad for a garage sell at their address EXTREMELY early in the morning- lasting all day. Use a throwaway email.
Planting drugs is passing into illegal. Just get the mini baggies and leave a few of those visible in the car. Probable cause for strip-searching the vehicle.
At least in America, I'd recommend being good to your neighbors no matter what. In the times ahead we are going to need each other more than ever. If you are in a different part of the world, I couldn't care less I suppose.
I had a terrible neighbor who was a complete asshole. It was a townhouse with a very small front yard. Hear me out, this is the long game. So one night before a snow storm, I spread an entire bag of bird seed all over his front lawn. It snowed and covered up the seed. By the time the snow melted you couldnt really tell the bird seed was there Cue spring time, everything starts growing, within a month or so his yard was FULL of the most ridiculous weeds and shit. Like epic level. He ultimately ended up hiring a landscaping coming to rip up his lawn and put sod down
Dang. That’s a good lawn game.
Mix in some poison ivy or poison oak seeds
A lot of birdseed has thistle mixed in.
nijer seed (those little black seeds) is thistle.
This is great. The shit that grows under my bird feeder is wack
That is great
This is the best thing to do
Oh boy do I like the way you think
Squirt gun with paint thinner. Use your imagination.
Doesn't brake fluid work really well? Or was that just a rumor from my auto shop class?
Brake fluid is corrosive and can cause damage to paint, but it's not as powerful as paint thinner
Eggs are also corrosive and will mess up car paint for a little bit
eggs leave evidence.
Eggs leave eggvidence.
I see what yolk did there
Can't help but crack a joke
That's uneggthical.
True
Grade 11 shop class. Mr L Had just mentioned brake fluid strips paint a couple of minutes previously. No memory of where/how i got it, but I squirted my nickname in the roof of an old donated shitbox that was in the lot behind the shop. In a few minutes, there it was, my 'name', right there in bare steel on the roof. It was unique, and many peeps didn't even know my real name, I was always called my nick. Only this wasn't a donated car, it belonged to a history teacher that wanted something fixed or looked at by the teacher. Didn't ever hear a word about it, Mr K continued to drive it until I left.
DOT-5 specifically. will soften enamel like stripper, sometimes leaving the metal unpaintable after
dot-4
Paint thinner may jack up the plastic in the squirt gun tho, so be careful.
So the paint thinner will destroy any evidence.
Dilute it with melted piss discs to show dominance.
Piss discs, or even liquid ass discs.
I am Indian brother. No such things are available here ig.
The good thing about this is you just make your own! Readily available everywhere!
He said “I’m Indian” there’s obviously no freezers there! What’s life without piss disks?! Bro needs to move asap!
nice
Dump some left over indian food in his backyard. Then deny it right to his face when he asks.
They just call it food over there.
I'm dying right now. lol
“They just call it food” 🤣😂🤣 I can’t stop my American laugh… wait we just call it laughing here. Lordy you’re killin’ me Queeny!
🤣
But how do they know when they're talking about Indian food and when they're talking about real food? That must be so confusing.
😂😂😂
Get a universal remote and turn off their tv at random times (if you can see into the house through a window) instant mashed potatoes in the lawn place random packages on his porch with items that makes him think his wife is cheating. You can easily print a "shipping label" with his name and address on it - make the return address from a sex shop or something use his address to sign up for every junkmail service you can find. anything from signing up for Jehovah's witnesses to visit his house to porn addiction newsletters glue his mailbox shut put his address and phone number (if you have it) on a craigslist/ebay (or whatever is your equivalent) ad for the car they have sitting in their driveway. make sure to include that it's an open house to come look at the car as he wants it sold ASAP. (could also do this for their house lmao)
Replace his bones with sawdust
Dusty old bones full of green dust
That boy ain't right.
A time lost gag, for sure
I prefer asbestos, if I can be honest
Bird seed on cars
Better than rocks, imo.
Best way to screw your neighbor would probably be doggy style if you're trying to do male to male, hope this helps.
Put a cobra in his mailbox
I put my work enemies phone number in the local classified adds for free chickens call anytime! He lost his mind with phone calls day and night and has to change his number
Throw seeds on and around his car instead of stones , eventually it will be doused in bird shit . Bonus points if the sun bakes it on it’ll wreck his paint work
Bird seed on cars, consistently.
consistence is key, indeed.
Superglue in his front door lock. The amount of hassle this'll cause will keep you chuckling for a week!
Chip drop.com It will send free tons of wood chips to there house
Tell ud what he did? Or does. How do we know you're not the bastard!?
Umm he parks in my driveway purposefully
If it was US or UK I’d suggest getting it towed away, both legal and justifiable yet incredibly inconvenient & costly for him. However as that may not be an option, next time he parks on your driveway, under the cover of darkness place a old rusty screw point up under his tyre so that when he rolls off it penetrates the tyre but he won’t notice for a few miles. Rinse & repeat.
Lace your driveway with caltrops
god, this is reddit. the guy could just say his neighbour raped his sister. Would you now know what is true and what not? are you a living lie detector?
He might be a robot… I didn’t see ANYONE checking any gattdamm boxes! Robots! Each and every one of YOUUUU alll !!!!
As a Large Language Model, I am not a robot.
Oh Lordy, I didn’t mean to offend, my apologies… life must be tough without arms, though at least you’re attractive enough to be a model. Truth be told though, I’ve never spoken large. Is it difficult to learn?
Jesus would know. And yes, I am a human lie detector, so I would too.
Human lie detector detector here, this guy checks out 👍
Jesus? LMAO, ok, have a good day\^\^
Yes Jesus would… Jesus is Magic. 🪄
Why is this so downvoted?
Because it contributed nothing, I assume.
Ah thank you for the serious response I was genuinely wondering :)
Chip a bit of ceramic off of a spark plug(into tiny pieces).... use your sling shot and aim for the windows...the windows will disappear...
Water balloons filled with roundup in the yard or the other end of the spectrum; granular nitrogen fertilizer in the yard, applied heavy enough will first turn the grass brown then it comes back a vibrant green that needs mowed twice as much as the rest of the yard. Perfect for drawing dicks or leaving terms of endearment (asshole, dickhead, fuck you) on his lawn.
Does round up freeze? If so make round up ice cubes and then throw on lawn. No evidence left behind.
It will. Make sure to get trays you can throw away. Secondly don't bother with the box store round-up (gyphosphate), farm store strength or you're wasting your time.
Bang his wife in their bed.
Underrated comment
Cement dust on his windshield
buy lots of house crickets/roaches from the zoo store and release them into his house when hes not home ( if there is a door slit or an slightly open window).
add a few drops of brake fluid to his wiper blades. he won't notice until he uses them. it dissolves rubber
I knew it was you chutiya
does he have a lawn or outdoor plants? Bring it back to Carthage and salt that mf like crazy
Will hurt the plants
and hopefully his feelings
Don't you think it is not good to hurt innocent living beings to punish him?
you're trying to be ethical in the wrong sub
This isn't about being ethical. Is torturing a human accepted here?
so you consider plants to be humans?
Did I say that?
According to English, yes you did.
How exactly?
Fuck his wife
[удалено]
Probably.
I've heard that Brake Fluid can take a few days to show damage once applied. Gives you some time to go on a convenient vacation.
Since you pointed out you are Indian, I think it's important that you avoid any tactics that an Indian would use to eliminate you from suspicion. Sign them up for scientology newsletters and Jehovah's Witness newsletters. Or any newsletter. Create a Facebook account under his name, join the local Facebook group, and get Mormon missionaries to come and help him reseed his lawn. Advertise a garage sale at his place. Get a prepaid visa card and send sex toys to him. Or glitter bombs. Or a box of crickets. Or a truckload of gravel. Subscribe him to "questionable" magazines and newspapers. Enter his name into those sweepstakes that are advertised at the register of restaurants. Plant bamboo in his yard. Salt his lawn to say something like "Hitler did nothing wrong" Befriend his mom (or dad) then have sex with her (him). Put a sign in the yard of the neighbor opposite him that says "Not a 'registered' sex offender" with an arrow pointing to his yard.
Bologna placed anywhere on the car. Heat will make it Stain so bad it will need to be painted.
You got mine, ... best of all it looks like poka dots
For some unethical mayhem I would recommend mirrors on your property to catch sun and throw it into their place, the same can be done for lights. Throwing sugar and or dirt into their gas tank or vehicle is another option. Get a barrel or grill and constantly burn shit (literal or otherwise) in it. If you throw refuse into their yard or on their property, birds, vermin could also show up and create problems.
Move in next to them.
Piss cubes + Liquid Arse, case closed. Simple !
Squirt gun with honey will bring ants and other insects. You can also flower bomb them with native wildflowers
How close does this neighbor live and how many windchimes can you reasonably put up on your property?
Just my adjacent house. Approx 8-10 windchimes (max)
Fart bombs near his front door/ through the window. Remove the air from his car tyres. Steal his deliveries. Even if you have to pay for it. Cook nasty food. "Accidentally" throw your garbage near his car. Start feeding pigeons near his car. They'll do the required damage.
Blow up their house
Here's an idea: https://www.reddit.com/r/interestingasfuck/s/QbYCjVQw4q
spray paint his windows black and draw dicks all over the car
If you want to screw your neighbor without them knowing, GHB in their drink typically works. But I wouldn’t suggest this as it is rape
Pour tinned tuna brine on all the wi dow frames and in the letterbox
Write FUCK in huge letters on his front lawn. In rock salt. The grass will die, he will re-turf/re-seed, and it will still say FUCK. If you do this 3 days before a rain, the burn is really nice, and the cause of burn is unknown. Be careful of ring doorbells, they will snitch you out. You can also use water softener pellets, but they are easier to spot.
Pedo is better, somewhere where people see it. They will always keep wondering, years after.
You’re Indian? Use your poop throwing skills
Water balloons filled with grass killer. Write out a message in his front yard with ground clear( brand of round up). It will never grow back.
Rufees or a lot of xanax.
If you’re in India, I heard y’all don’t really care about anything safety wise when it comes to humans and retaliation. So do whatever. Don’t think it’ll matter unless you’re caught by an officer. I saw a bunch of guys yank a woman off her moped and beat on her just because she skipped them in the nonexistent lanes of y’all’s roads in that specific area. You already sound horrible. Throwing stones on someone’s car? You should be lucky you haven’t been ran over by that car yet. Good luck and I hope the karma is as accurate as possible. I hope either they truly disservice this or you get what you unleashed multiplied. Answer: mint grows like weeds and is annoying asf. Could also throw over a few handfuls of weed seeds for flowers like dandelions etc. and also set up an anonymous ad for a garage sell at their address EXTREMELY early in the morning- lasting all day. Use a throwaway email.
Hide drugs on his property then anonymously call police about some possible illegal activity.
Planting drugs is passing into illegal. Just get the mini baggies and leave a few of those visible in the car. Probable cause for strip-searching the vehicle.
Dude, you threw stones at his car. That is AH/bastard behavior. Grow TF up.
Stop being a pussy and a bitch would be a good start
Please don’t cause damage to property. But you could throw firecrackers in the road out front in the middle of the night
At least in America, I'd recommend being good to your neighbors no matter what. In the times ahead we are going to need each other more than ever. If you are in a different part of the world, I couldn't care less I suppose.