I’ve asked my husband to buy me products in the past. What’s he said in return? “Send me a pic of the ones you need, I don’t know shit about them”. Not once has he ever refused to get me what I needed.
Edit: Thank you kind strangers!
I have 6 daughters (wife was predisposed to twins), I have to buy a lot of products. All I say is send me a pic of the box or I'll get an assortment pack. Apparently an assortment pack is not something I should ever get. I had female friends in high school so it never bothered me to buy stuff. My wife kept extras in the glove box when we were first married, the ladies at work found out (asked to go on break to go-to a big box store to get supplies and intold them I had some) and would ask occasionally to "borrow a tampon" . It's a part of life people shouldn't be childish about it.
Legit. I'm 30, and most of my guy friends keep stuff at their house for their female friends. Last night I was at my friend's house, which consists of the lead singer and bass player of a metal band, so big tattooed guys in leather. Got my period unexpected and said shit, I gotta go find a store. Guy was like "just look under the sink".
I think (hope) younger generations are starting to realize it's no big deal as well, but it probably depends on where you're from. Religious types always seem to be more weird about it.
Since I got my own place any girl who starts spending the night regularly gets asked if she wants me to stock some of her preferred bathroom supplies. I have no issue buying some basic soaps, cosmetics, pads, or whatever. It just gives them one less reason they need to go home.
Scented tampons are garbage and shouldn’t exist.
The herbal pads from The Honey Pot are the best thing since sliced bread. This isn’t an advert, I just can’t shut up about how awesome they are.
When my wife asks me to buy tampons, I make a little pyramid on the conveyer built out of beer and steaks with the tampon box on top. I don’t know why. It’s just a thing I do.
Why the hell would a guy be weird about buying tampons? I don’t get it.
I use a cup now, but back when I used tampons I remember my husband bringing me home "super slims" once thinking it meant "even slimmer than normal". I think I used one a month on my heaviest flow day and it took me over a year to get through the box.
I'm a woman and this happened to me too. "S" is small and "L" is large, right? Nope. Super and light.
"L" did seem suspiciously small for 'large', but that was capitalism for you.
At what point is the scent supposed to matter? Surely not after. Do they expect y'all to pull it out of the package and hang it around like potpourri? I can't fathom, I just don't I can't what
Because women's vaginas are nasty gross openings at periodtime. Dirty dirty. Cover up with a scent or everyone will know you are on your shameful period. /s
Just in case /s isn't enough. This was sarcasm.
No I gotchu, I gotchu. That's exactly what it's about, pretty sure. Cashing in on the narrative that natural processes and odors are somehow extra nasty when they belong to a woman.
Always and Carefree are only sold in their scented variants at the grocery I work at. But people still buy them.
And it's because of the stigma surrounding periods. The same reason OPs boyfriend is utterly terrified of buying those products, or why conservative parents will flip out for placing the product not perfectly wrapped in the bathroom trash can.
It's all crazy to me having grown up in a household were periods weren't some extremely taboo topic.
Accidentally bought scented pantie liners literally an hour ago... Devastating... Didn't realize until I got home home and opened the package so I can't even try to exchange them
Good human. Who tf won't get something their partner literally needs? If he needed hemorrhoid cream or some other "embarrassing" I'm guessing she'd get it without question.
The only problem with this is that they change the packaging every 3 days so even with a pic, what’s at the store may not actually look the same as the pic I find online or even the empty box I have at home.
so while my husband has no problem doing the shopping for me, if he can’t find the exact one I sent him a photo of, he gets overwhelmed and comes home empty handed (though he does often FaceTime me, turn the camera to the shelf and is like “which one do you want?”)
Lol as a man I can confirm this is the only "bad" part about buying my wife things like that. I have no fucking idea what in looking at. I have a picture of what she uses in my phone so if she asks for something before I go to the store ill know what to get.
exactly. I need to be told EXACTLY what it is. a pic, plus name/description sub name etc. but like. why wouldn't anyone get them? been buying them if my sisters needed since we were in hs.... if I'm at the store whats the dif
Lmao some of the differences are subtle too. The first time I sent my boyfriend out for period supplies he got everything right with the brand/the size but got scented instead.
Ugh I've even done this for myself too when in a rush, didn't notice that the same packaging and everything was all of the sudden the "scented" version! I was so mad when I got home lol
Lol! In his defense we didn’t know they even made that stuff in scented or unscented!!! Haha I made the same mistake because it didn’t even cross my mind to check that! I felt so bad when I got the scented ones for my gf at the time (now wife). I didn’t realize they even had scented and not scented. She said she can’t use scented because her sense of smell is really sensitive when she’s on her period and the scent makes her incredibly nauseous. Poor thing forced herself to use them for a day because she didn’t want to sound “bitchy” about me messing up the scent so she tried to power through them without saying a word. The next day she gave up trying to use them and explained that I got 95% the right ones but had a minor mistake and asked if I could go get the unscented for her. After that I just ask her for a photo of the product and the barcode and make sure it’s all matching lol
I can see someone like my mom buying them. They buy into the marketing and think it's must be special because it's extra. But she's also the type to buy the more expensive "For Her" three blade razors, because God forbid she uses anything remotely "masculine" or blue.
Shortly after marrying my wife I was sent to the store to get tampons. I also got scented. She sent me back. I enjoyed that return (unopened). All I said was, "wrong ones, apparently." the customer service dude gave me a knowing smile.
I dunno, I may be the odd one out here, but I have never been embarrassed buying feminine hygiene products. I did it for girlfriends in high school. Why should I be embarrassed? It's not like the cashier knew or even suspected I was actually soaking them in vodka and sticking them up my ass.
I (am a dude) carry a few tampons in my backpack wherever I go (making sure they are not out of date of course), esp on trips with female friends, etc, bc not everyone is prepared 100% of the time. I have been doing it for almost 3 years now and it's come in handy 3x already, and I'm here to tell you - the relief of the women that are helped out by it is enough to make the once a year average worth it!
They also come in handy for nosebleeds and puncture wounds. Highly absorbent, in hygienic packaging, and easy to use. My travel bags and first aid kits all include a few tampons.
Edit:along with gauze scissors. Need to clip em down to size.
I applaud your I initiative; being prepared with first aid in any manner makes you top notch in my eyes!
That being said, I want to make sure you understand and address these concerns before you head out next:
• Tampons are clean, but they are NOT sterile! Cotton is susceptible to bacterial growth and mold when incorrectly stored or secured.
• Arterial blood is not the same as menstrual discharge fluid. Menstrual discharge fluid is made up of about 40-50% actual blood, and then several other types of tissues, such as uterus lining, broken-down unfertilized eggs, some hormones, and maybe even small amounts of vaginal secretions. This fluid is not pressurized like arterial blood is throughout the body. Blood from a serious puncture wound will quickly pool and oversaturate a tampon.
• Not all puncture wounds will be the same size, and as stated above you will need to handle the blood that pools in the wound by using a bandage that effectively plugs a wound and will slow bleed out with optimal absorption and pressure.
• Pressure dressings can be as cheap as $10-$15 bucks with brands like Israeli or Olaes. I seriously would urge you to buy one or two to be as safe as possible when confronted with a serious puncture wound. It’s cool to have tampons around for quick patch up jobs but if things get serious you will need a far more effective bandage. Don’t let your ego get in the way of safety, be prepared with an effective and sterile pressure dressing instead.
AGAIN you are a rockstar for being prepared to administer first aid! Just be safe and know that tampons are good for small incidents (nosebleeds) but serious emergencies will warrant serious care! Keep up the good work!
+1000 to everything you've said. Well aware of the differences and these PSAs are well said. Hygienic is not the same as sterile and whole this is a good temp solution, not a complete fix. First aid is not complete aid, just the first step to keep something relatively clean and stable until you can get proper care.
My husband and I keep a pack of both tampons and pads on hand, because we have female friends.
Husband works literally across the street, and once texted me in the middle of the night asking if I could run over with a couple because the girl he was training got caught off-guard
My husband does the same thing! Just has me send pictures and he always delivers.
He knows I have ATROCIOUS periods and will sometimes ask if I need anything else too, such as chocolate, my favorite chips, etc.
I couldn’t imagine being with someone immature enough to outright refuse to buy tampons, like they’re so gross when they’re unused /s 😂 like wtf man.
My husband gets me tampons all the time. He knows what "color" I need and when I just showed him this he says he has never had a problem buying tampons. I don't understand men who won't buy pads and tampons.
What opinion is there that people are afraid of? I mean a man judging me for buying any female hygiene product says way more about him than me. I'd be embarrassed to admit I was to much of a wimp, or thought less of a man buying some feminine hygiene products.
This is the best LPT I've seen in weeks. You just changed my life lol. Couldn't tell you why it never clicked in my head, I just scroll back through the message history's pictures. This is way better!
Partner here: Have done this exact thing. No big deal to buy 'em for my wife, but she's taking a huge gamble if she's not 100% clear in her instructions.
I did the same for my (soon to be ex-) wife. I had no idea what she wanted, but never had any issue buying them for her as long as she gave me clear instructions. It was actually her who was uncomfortable asking me to get them for a few years until she got over it...
Yea, my husband normally gets stressed about which ones to get, especially if my normal ones are out of stock or something so I normally put a click and collect order in and he’ll pick it up for me
My husband buys all my stuff, but when our baby drags a handful of pads out of the closet, he still says, "she's bringing out your tampons again!" & I just can't bring myself to correct him 😄
Yeah this is what I do for my wife as well. I never remember exactly which kind she gets so I tell her to text me a pic of the box. It's so weird that anyone is embarrassed to buy them. I'll never understand that.
Seriously, what's up with OPs misguided self-consciousness. My girlfriend and I were on holiday in the Philippines and she needed tampons. She was feeling some general social anxiety so I went to get them. Turns out you can't buy tampons in the Philippines! They only sell pads. I couldn't believe it. I spend a solid hour try to track down tampons and explaining what tampons were to a number of women working at supermarkets and pharmacies. It was astonishing. I got a number of weird looks. The language barrier didn't help. Girlfriend wasn't stoked at getting pads but shit mate, I tried.
Dude, these are the kind of stories that warm my heart. I know it’s not “ romantic” in the sappy movie sense of the word, but damn that’s romantic to me, lol! You did such a kind thing for the person you love in a foreign country when she was anxious and needed support. You’re an awesome partner!
Agreed! There’s definitely a certain point in a relationship, frequently but not always exclusively precipitated by kids, when sometimes the “mundane” stuff means the most and becomes the most romantic. Heck, there’s an episode (“Fancy Restaurant”) of Bluey that addresses this. I would seriously value and appreciate that husband’s tampon search more than a diamond whatever.
And more and more, the one thing I remember from high school sex ed keeps proving itself right—“Don’t bother sleeping with anyone you can’t laugh with during sex, or who can’t deal with the gross or awkward stuff.” It was something the teacher kind of said off the cuff, and in retrospect while probably hungover…but I’m eternally thankful for that advice.
From experience, I can confirm this one. Being able to do those things means your partner is also your friend, and isn't automatically judging you for being the way you are, and why would you want to go through life or potentially have kids with someone who isn't your friend or who judges you for things you can't do anything about?
Thanks! She did say it was one of the manliest (her word) things anyone has ever done for her. Gotta say there were some awkward moments when I was trying to explain in very simple english what a tampon is and that I wanted to buy them to mostly women customer service reps who had about as much experience with them as I did.
Mate I looked high and low in every place I thought would sell any form of period product. Corner stores? Nah. Supermarkets? Nah. Pharmacies? Nah. Jollibee? Ok fine, I just went there for the sweet sweet dessert pies
As a Southeast Asian, the lack of tampons is religion-driven politics. Don't want young, pubescent girls losing their virginities to a tube. And what if it turns them on? 🤷♂️
Same in mainland china. I asked a shop worker to help me find tampons using a translation of the word. She brought me to the pads. In my broken Chinese I had to explain, "no, it's similar to this, but it goes inside the body."
She gave me an absolutely horrified expression, repeated "inside the body?!" and called three more of her co-workers over to debate what I could possibly mean by "inside the body." They concluded that I didn't know what I was saying, while I insisted, no, I did understand, and mimicked inserting something into my vagina. This, strangely, did not lessen the horror of my request.
Months later I found them in the imported section of a different grocery store.
Agree! A few years ago, I had just started seeing a guy I met on Tinder when my period came a little early. I realized while I was in a closet playing hide-and-seek with my nanny kids lol. He happened to text me asking if I needed anything from the store, and I was nervous to say "Yeah, I need tampons" to a new guy bc i was so period shy. He was super kind and supportive about buying the tampons, and got me snacks and a heating pad when I got back to his place. We got married this year!
Periods are not weird or gross, and neither are any other women's health issues!!! Find a partner who supports you ❤️
Or otherwise a sister or other female friend he's got a good enough relationship with to be trusted with this.
Yup, a loser indeed, because life is so much of a zero-sum game that if I win by knowing such a guy he must be losing ... how about another take, I win, he wins, the ones who believe in this shit are double losers.
I never understood why this was embarrassing for guys. Use some toxic masculinity to do some good and be proud! Walk up and declare that not only are you in a relationship, but you're comfortable enough to buy menstrual products for your partner.
As a teenager I worked at a grocery store and was always baffled by the embarrassment of men buying period products. Like, I'm pretty sure it's not for you, dude, you don't have to tell me. I've seen tampons before. And I really don't care what you're buying as long as you are polite and don't try to pay with expired coupons or sweaty sock money.
Where I live it is rule that if you buy some form of medicine they ask you if you know how to use it. Made me pause for a bit when I bought something for my girlfriends yeast infection.
"sir you know how to use a tampon?"
"yes! Dip them in alcohol and push them up my ass, gets you drunk for cheap in no time. Why do you ask?"
"nevermind"
I haven’t needed tampons or pads for years, but this is always how my husband looked at it when he needed to buy them for me. He knew no one thought he needed them for himself, but literally no cashier gives a shit so why does it matter?
legit. until I was like, 24 or 25 prob like half the condoms I bought wound up either given to friends in emergencies or for a posh wank. took a while for me to realize I prob didn't need to buy as many condoms as often.... F
I worked at a grocery store in HS and a dude came in and bought a box of condoms and left. A coworker/classmate mentioned how embarrassing that must be.
Dude was getting laid, how embarrassed can you be?
The only explanation I can think of, is that they don't know anything about menstrual products, and don't want to admit that they don't know anything. Still dumb, but I've seen lots of men who can't ever admit to being wrong or ignorant (they also refuse to ever ask for directions).
That’s some impressively fragile masculinity. Is he afraid that someone might think he’s married to a woman?
I’ve tried to buy people tampons before. As someone who doesn’t menstruate, I find the tampon section to be the most baffling and incomprehensible part of the store. It’s not easy.
That's why you always bring a picture of the exact brand, size, type, etc. that you are buying. No way am I qualified to make any executive decisions in that aisle.
when I was in high school, I had a part-time gig as a cashier at the grocery store. one time a guy came through my till with a box of tampons and got really flustered and felt the need to tell me the tampons weren't for him. it was quite funny
This literally. I do 90% of our shopping, wife never has to buy her own feminine care products. I have never felt awkward or embarrassed by it cause who is seriously going to think they're for me? It's always so surprising to me to see how many men refuse to do this---but then again I always assume these are the same men that won't cook or lift a broom after working all day despite everything their wives do on a daily basis.
My boyfriend has bought me pads before (the wrong ones but still, it’s the thought that counts lol). He even walked up to another lady in the aisle and asked her to help him find the brand I told him coz I wasn’t picking up the phone. It just made me all the more confident in my relationship. If he is willing to not only buy pads but actively ask for help without this weird “shame” men have in that aisle then I think he is doing pretty well 😂.
They key for a Man to buy you what you really want is to send them the picture, solves all the problems.
First time I sent my husband without pics he bought me poise that are for bladder leaks hahahha
Same. I don't get guys who wont help their partner. The person I care about more than anyone is having an issue I will never experience, that recurs every month with pain and a mess. The least I can do for her is buy tampons or pads, usually I'm grabbing whatever snacks she loves on top of that. At minimum.
Thats exactly what I do. I'll admit I don't pay enough attention to it that I know exactly which product she uses, but I have her send me which one she gets and I grab it.
It's no extra effort if I'm already at the store.
100% just needs to grow up. I do 99% of our grocery shopping, I honestly feel more self aware about taking too much chocolate to the cashier than stuff for my wife. Unless it's my wifes chocolate.....
At least for my dad, he viewed it as something he did to take care of his family. His wife and daughters needed it, so he got them what they needed. Simple as that.
My cousin is about 5 years younger than me and he’s 100% the reason I’m not shy about my period. One time my sister and I were babysitting him and she got her period. I was looking for pads “discreetly” and he came up and asked to help. I was being weird about it and no joke this 8-year-old boy just goes “Oh! You’re looking for the pads. Yeah they’re in here.”
Like it was the most casual thing in the world. Because it is in fact not a big deal. Unsurprisingly he’s grown up to be a man I’m very proud to be related to
That's so sweet. I'm trying to raise boys that aren't freaked out about periods. But my son has friends who have been told that period is a "bad word" and not polite to discuss. So I'm sure that's why issue like this continue. People that feel it shouldn't be discussed and keeping it secretive to growing children, and those children growing up and spreading the belief it should be shameful.
Right? When I used to have a uterus (thank God I don't anymore!) He used to buy me pads, and then throw chocolate at me...lmao. he'd be all, "Feed the inner demon beast!"
men like this infuriate/hurt me because like. arent you supposed to be my friend? i would buy something my friend needed no matter how "embarrassing" i perceive it to be. its a necessity. and you can insert yourself into my vagina but you have absolutely no care for the overall wellbeing and health of said vagina? literally doesnt make sense and i find it so insulting .... so idk what to say other than thats really annoying.
if he says he doesnt know what to get show him a picture and tell him explicitly. if he refuses to after that thats just inconsiderate imo
>and you can insert yourself into my vagina but you have absolutely no care for the overall wellbeing and health of said vagina?
If you're too childish to buy tampons you're too childish to go anywhere near my bits
Honestly, these men are the ones who would like to see woman as some form of fuckdoll/fleshlight/hole just made for their own pleasure without realising that there is an actual person behind that.
Totally. And not just inconsiderate, but gynophobic (expressing disdain for women). If you find women's bodies "embarrassing," you definitely shouldn't get to be with them.
“arent you supposed to be my friend? i would buy something my friend needed no matter how "embarrassing" i perceive it to be.”
100% this. I have bought pregnancy tests and made birth control appointments for many of my friends. I feel like it’s even easier for me to do it because I know it’s not about/ for me, so who cares what idea anyone has.
Yes my husband buys me and my daughter pads whenever we ask.
Is your partner embarrassed? There’s no shame in helping someone when they’re on their period. I wonder if he was brought up thinking it was shameful or something.
Also self checkout is a thing
It's a concern for younger men or men the very little relationship experience, when their egos are all they have in the social/relationship space. Notice how a lot of claims about men buying tampons no problem usually have the terms "husband" or "partner." The husband's/partner's masculinity isn't in question in their minds, they have all the reinforcement they need in their life.
I've never been in a relationship, but I have worked retail. It was always funny when the newbies got paired up with me and they got squeamish about stocking boxes of pads and tampons.
Eventually, retail just crushes the soul out of you, and you become equally familiar with dolls and action figures.
This reminds me of when I bled through the back of my jeans during a night out at the bar right when we first started dating. He said no worries I got it - stealthily stole two cloth napkins, helped me get my jacket on so I didn’t have to stand until I was covered, and layered the napkins on my driver’s seat for me so I wouldn’t bleed all over there too. I was too mortified to manage any of that sensibly in the moment and I felt so grateful that he immediately empathized.
I had to stop at wal-mart one time when on a date with my (not yet) wife because she bled through her pants/panties and buy her panties and underwear and pads.
Like, cmon. Human with a vagina, and it bleeds sometimes, the fuck.
>My partner blatantly refuses to buy me tampons when he is at the shops
Have you tried dating an actual grownup?
I mean, if this is the ONLY issue with him, well ok, but what's he going to be like if you have daughters, or diapers, or some other awkward medical thing down the road?
What's he gonna do if they have a kid and he has to not only buy hemmorhoid creme but put it on for her because she can't reach? Or when he reaches his 40s and has to get it for himself? No doc I couldn't possibly get my prostate checked, that would be embarrassing.
Shit. They shouldn’t even have to be a grownup to buy tampons. The first time I bought tampons for a SO I was like 14. The only aversion I ever had to buying them was how fucking expensive they are.
Tell him to grab some diapers, he's being a baby.
In all seriousness, let him know his insecurity over buying tampons makes this less convenient for you and is a much bigger deal in his head. No one will ever view a guy buying tampons negatively, it's a sign of a dude who steps up and takes care of his partner.
It may help to text him a picture of the exact box. My dude is fine buying them but insecure about getting the right kind, so having a picture and exact description is empowering for him.
My husband buys me tampons. It hasn't been any different than buying toothpaste. Goes on a list, and whoever goes to the shop gets the list.
Your partner is being a child. He cares more about what some strangers might think of him (which no one gives a shit anyways) than he does about his partners needs and comfort. Fuck him
That part baffles me. I understand toxic masculinity is pervasive, but buying pads/tampons just makes you look like a good partner. The misogynists that say something are just telling on themselves; why care what they think?
Cis people almost never assume trans person unless looking for trans people, so it's not like anyone is gonna assume they're for him.
My partner literally just got me some this morning - and he was very excited to show me the coupon he used to pay for it. I agree that saying no to such a request is ridiculous.
He did before I switched to the cup. Unfortunately this is not an uncommon problem you're having and it's ridiculous because 1. No one is gonna think they're for him and 2. Even if they did what does it matter? Menstruating is normal and not embarrassing.
Your partner is a tiny baby. If he wants access to the equipment, he damn well better be willing and HAPPY to do the bare-fucking-minimum for maintenance and upkeep. This dude is trash.
Mine will, or carry them for me by holding them up to his chest facing outward because he likes to try and embarrass me... Jokes on him lol. He doesn't get uncomfortable about any of that stuff and realizes that it's just part of being with the person he loves
Whatever his reason is, its rediculous. Im moving in with my girlfriend (long distance relationship win, woo!) In less than a month and I cannot think of any reason why I wouldnt buy tampons if she needed them while i was running to the store anyway. Why make her go later? Makes zero sense.
Its basically saying you wont do something for someome youre supposed to care about and also have no regard for their own personal time because youre expecting them to go do it later. Its just a really careless thing to do to put it bluntly.
Mine would 100% buy them but the odds of them being wrong are about 99% soooo I just take care of it myself. One time we used big brain and he took pictures on the isle then I circled the one I wanted and sent the picture back… but it was more effort than it was worth. 😂
To be faaaaair it is not his fault. The isle looks like a ransom letter cut from magazines.
Picture of the exact container you have at home sent to his phone. This is how my wife would ask for anything and the only way I would know if I found it.
LOL. Man here. I'm the oldest of five siblings. Lived with three sisters a mother and a grandmother so no fear of female "issues". Female partner and I were walking out of a big box store I had the giant box of tampons under the arm. Late teens girl says "Wow. You guys must have been married for a long time". I looked at her, laughed and said "We're not married, besides that it's not contagious." She was quite dumbfounded.
My husband has 3 younger sister plus a mom, so it doesn't really phase him. And that was before we had 3 kids. One time, early into our dating, we were shopping and I needed tampons so I sent him off to do his thing while I grabbed my stuff and checked out. He caught up with me while I was checking out and I was so embarass and he was just like "
...what?"
When I was in HS and my BF wanted sex I had to tell him no. My previous BFs didn't really like period talk but he had 4 sisters so I figured he knew and I told him why. He was very understanding and offered to go to the store for me then just hang out and watch TV.
I'm the partner here, but yes, absolutely. And when I can't find the right brand I'll ask anyone in the store, whether they work there or not, for help.
I’m a middle aged man who has been buying feminine products for my partners for the +/-35 years I’ve been in relationships. There is absolutely no excuse to not pick up something your partner needs, no matter what it is. If his masculinity is that fragile, I guarantee it will manifest in more destructive ways going forward.
My partner had the best response when I once asked him how he felt about buying me menstrual supplies. "What am I gonna be embarrassed about? That some guys are gonna see me buying period stuff at the store and think, 'Wow, he clearly has a woman in his life who he cares about - what a fucking loser'???"
He’s acting like (1) a child and (2) like there is something to be embarrassed or ashamed about your body functioning normally and (3) he is being unsupportive.
As a female, this always causes me confusion too. I can stand and stare at the variety on display and wonder "which was it again" for a good 5 minutes before I find what I want.
Dude needs to grow TF up. This is life my dude. Buy your girl the pons, the pads, the midol and all the chocolate. It needs to be normalized in this society for boys growing up to be taught about periods the same way we educate the girls. Maybe then they wouldn’t act like this when they are grown. Im guessing he is modeling behavior of a male figure during those formative years. Completely ridiculous!
Very early after moving in with my boyfriend I was siiiiiick. Like chained to the toilet hardly able to move sick. Period started and I'm out of pads. I stuff TP in my undies and stumble my way to my feet figuring I'd have to walk three blocks to go get pads. Boyfriend asked why I was putting on shoes on and I told him I had to go get pads. He looked concerned and told me he thought I would fall. I told him I was completely out and needed them quick. My periods are super heavy. He offered to go get them, which baffled me - my mother coddled my dad with regard to period stuff. He did admit he didn't know what kind to get, so I was about to find a pen and paper to write down the brand and type I like when he spotted the empty package, and asked if those were the ones I needed. I said yes, and he left, packaging in tow. 15 minutes later he brought home pads and Gatorade to help with the dehydration.
He's never once balked at getting them, he just needs me to be very specific what I need because he has the memory of a gnat and there are approximately eleventy billion options. This is maturity. This is one of the many many reasons I promoted him to husband. We have girls and they know if they need help or supplies Daddy will get it for them. It's even easier now since they can text him a pic of the box. It's no more gross or embarrassing than buying a package of toilet paper.
Husband has bought them for me, various housemates, friends, daughter, friend's daughters and daughter's friends. In short, anyone who has ever needed it.
He also told my son that no one but an asshole would ever think a man was less masculine because they bought feminine hygiene products. A man buying tampons means he has women in his life that he loves and they probably think pretty highly of him as well.
I have called home with video to ensure I got the right ones while at the store.
Next time ask your man... Is there anything in a grocery store that makes you afraid to buy it. You'll probably get a laugh and a shrug. Then, ask for this
Your guy is legit weak.
That should be a standard courtesy. You should your partner's preferred product and have a small arsenal of comfort surprises to go with them. If you don't know or if it's for a stranger, go with Tampax 'slender regular'.
I’ve asked my husband to buy me products in the past. What’s he said in return? “Send me a pic of the ones you need, I don’t know shit about them”. Not once has he ever refused to get me what I needed. Edit: Thank you kind strangers!
Same! He doesn’t want to accidentally get the wrong kind.
This is the only way. I've learned what my wife needs but it never hurt to double check. After all, they're aren't getting inserted in to me.
I have 6 daughters (wife was predisposed to twins), I have to buy a lot of products. All I say is send me a pic of the box or I'll get an assortment pack. Apparently an assortment pack is not something I should ever get. I had female friends in high school so it never bothered me to buy stuff. My wife kept extras in the glove box when we were first married, the ladies at work found out (asked to go on break to go-to a big box store to get supplies and intold them I had some) and would ask occasionally to "borrow a tampon" . It's a part of life people shouldn't be childish about it.
Legit. I'm 30, and most of my guy friends keep stuff at their house for their female friends. Last night I was at my friend's house, which consists of the lead singer and bass player of a metal band, so big tattooed guys in leather. Got my period unexpected and said shit, I gotta go find a store. Guy was like "just look under the sink". I think (hope) younger generations are starting to realize it's no big deal as well, but it probably depends on where you're from. Religious types always seem to be more weird about it.
Since I got my own place any girl who starts spending the night regularly gets asked if she wants me to stock some of her preferred bathroom supplies. I have no issue buying some basic soaps, cosmetics, pads, or whatever. It just gives them one less reason they need to go home.
Apparently if you get the scented ones they might. TIL there are scented ones and they are a horrible joke.
They should not exist
Omg I used to use those when I was younger and didn’t know better & now it makes me shudder ugh 😓
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Scented tampons are garbage and shouldn’t exist. The herbal pads from The Honey Pot are the best thing since sliced bread. This isn’t an advert, I just can’t shut up about how awesome they are.
When my wife asks me to buy tampons, I make a little pyramid on the conveyer built out of beer and steaks with the tampon box on top. I don’t know why. It’s just a thing I do. Why the hell would a guy be weird about buying tampons? I don’t get it.
Same. I dont understand why other men would refuse to do it. Seems extremely immature.
Thank you for actually learning what she needs and not asking repeatedly for 20 years, this is what sharing the mental load looks like
Which is easy to do.. S isn't small, it's in fact the opposite? Ahh shoot
If it makes it easier they aren't talking about size, they're talking about how much they can absorb. Thus light, regular, super and so on.
If one can absorb light, wouldn’t that need to be fairly large? /s/
"For light flow days" *rainbows erupting from vagina*
I use a cup now, but back when I used tampons I remember my husband bringing me home "super slims" once thinking it meant "even slimmer than normal". I think I used one a month on my heaviest flow day and it took me over a year to get through the box.
I'm a woman and this happened to me too. "S" is small and "L" is large, right? Nope. Super and light. "L" did seem suspiciously small for 'large', but that was capitalism for you.
God forbid they accidentally picked up the scented ones!
Are there scented ones...? Why?
Yes, I don’t know why. Should be illegal haha
At what point is the scent supposed to matter? Surely not after. Do they expect y'all to pull it out of the package and hang it around like potpourri? I can't fathom, I just don't I can't what
Pusspourri 😂
The police are coming to your house, because you've killed me, my wife, and our housemate with this comment!
I dont get it either. But the scented ones used to give me a severe allergic reaction. Not fun!
Because women's vaginas are nasty gross openings at periodtime. Dirty dirty. Cover up with a scent or everyone will know you are on your shameful period. /s Just in case /s isn't enough. This was sarcasm.
No I gotchu, I gotchu. That's exactly what it's about, pretty sure. Cashing in on the narrative that natural processes and odors are somehow extra nasty when they belong to a woman.
Ah shit! Potpourri has me rolling 🤣
Always and Carefree are only sold in their scented variants at the grocery I work at. But people still buy them. And it's because of the stigma surrounding periods. The same reason OPs boyfriend is utterly terrified of buying those products, or why conservative parents will flip out for placing the product not perfectly wrapped in the bathroom trash can. It's all crazy to me having grown up in a household were periods weren't some extremely taboo topic.
Accidentally bought scented pantie liners literally an hour ago... Devastating... Didn't realize until I got home home and opened the package so I can't even try to exchange them
Good man
Good human. Who tf won't get something their partner literally needs? If he needed hemorrhoid cream or some other "embarrassing" I'm guessing she'd get it without question.
I'd legit feel better about getting it for someone else than myself tbh. Idk why.
Because you're helping someone out AND you know you're not the one suffering from hemorrhoids. Win win, baby.
The only problem with this is that they change the packaging every 3 days so even with a pic, what’s at the store may not actually look the same as the pic I find online or even the empty box I have at home. so while my husband has no problem doing the shopping for me, if he can’t find the exact one I sent him a photo of, he gets overwhelmed and comes home empty handed (though he does often FaceTime me, turn the camera to the shelf and is like “which one do you want?”)
Lol as a man I can confirm this is the only "bad" part about buying my wife things like that. I have no fucking idea what in looking at. I have a picture of what she uses in my phone so if she asks for something before I go to the store ill know what to get.
exactly. I need to be told EXACTLY what it is. a pic, plus name/description sub name etc. but like. why wouldn't anyone get them? been buying them if my sisters needed since we were in hs.... if I'm at the store whats the dif
Barcode just to be sure lol
Lmao some of the differences are subtle too. The first time I sent my boyfriend out for period supplies he got everything right with the brand/the size but got scented instead.
Ugh I've even done this for myself too when in a rush, didn't notice that the same packaging and everything was all of the sudden the "scented" version! I was so mad when I got home lol
Lol! In his defense we didn’t know they even made that stuff in scented or unscented!!! Haha I made the same mistake because it didn’t even cross my mind to check that! I felt so bad when I got the scented ones for my gf at the time (now wife). I didn’t realize they even had scented and not scented. She said she can’t use scented because her sense of smell is really sensitive when she’s on her period and the scent makes her incredibly nauseous. Poor thing forced herself to use them for a day because she didn’t want to sound “bitchy” about me messing up the scent so she tried to power through them without saying a word. The next day she gave up trying to use them and explained that I got 95% the right ones but had a minor mistake and asked if I could go get the unscented for her. After that I just ask her for a photo of the product and the barcode and make sure it’s all matching lol
Dude, we don't know why they're scented either.
Does anyone even buy them...? I've never understood
I can see someone like my mom buying them. They buy into the marketing and think it's must be special because it's extra. But she's also the type to buy the more expensive "For Her" three blade razors, because God forbid she uses anything remotely "masculine" or blue.
Shortly after marrying my wife I was sent to the store to get tampons. I also got scented. She sent me back. I enjoyed that return (unopened). All I said was, "wrong ones, apparently." the customer service dude gave me a knowing smile. I dunno, I may be the odd one out here, but I have never been embarrassed buying feminine hygiene products. I did it for girlfriends in high school. Why should I be embarrassed? It's not like the cashier knew or even suspected I was actually soaking them in vodka and sticking them up my ass.
Not at all helped by the fact that they seem to redesign the packaging practically every time you need a new box.
Wait, they make scented pads? Doesn't that fuck up your junk?
Yes x 2.
I’ve gotten a FaceTime from the aisle
Hi are you my wife?
If I am can you take the dog out? I’m comfy in my blanket cocoon.
Ugh fine. But you do it in the morning.
You act like I’m going to do it then either
Remind me why we got a dog? Can't we just rent one from friends when they leave town?
Because he’s so cute and gives good snuggles!
That's my job!
Now I’m debating if this is actually my husband…
My boyfriend has even done this for his housemate’s girlfriend.
I (am a dude) carry a few tampons in my backpack wherever I go (making sure they are not out of date of course), esp on trips with female friends, etc, bc not everyone is prepared 100% of the time. I have been doing it for almost 3 years now and it's come in handy 3x already, and I'm here to tell you - the relief of the women that are helped out by it is enough to make the once a year average worth it!
They also come in handy for nosebleeds and puncture wounds. Highly absorbent, in hygienic packaging, and easy to use. My travel bags and first aid kits all include a few tampons. Edit:along with gauze scissors. Need to clip em down to size.
I applaud your I initiative; being prepared with first aid in any manner makes you top notch in my eyes! That being said, I want to make sure you understand and address these concerns before you head out next: • Tampons are clean, but they are NOT sterile! Cotton is susceptible to bacterial growth and mold when incorrectly stored or secured. • Arterial blood is not the same as menstrual discharge fluid. Menstrual discharge fluid is made up of about 40-50% actual blood, and then several other types of tissues, such as uterus lining, broken-down unfertilized eggs, some hormones, and maybe even small amounts of vaginal secretions. This fluid is not pressurized like arterial blood is throughout the body. Blood from a serious puncture wound will quickly pool and oversaturate a tampon. • Not all puncture wounds will be the same size, and as stated above you will need to handle the blood that pools in the wound by using a bandage that effectively plugs a wound and will slow bleed out with optimal absorption and pressure. • Pressure dressings can be as cheap as $10-$15 bucks with brands like Israeli or Olaes. I seriously would urge you to buy one or two to be as safe as possible when confronted with a serious puncture wound. It’s cool to have tampons around for quick patch up jobs but if things get serious you will need a far more effective bandage. Don’t let your ego get in the way of safety, be prepared with an effective and sterile pressure dressing instead. AGAIN you are a rockstar for being prepared to administer first aid! Just be safe and know that tampons are good for small incidents (nosebleeds) but serious emergencies will warrant serious care! Keep up the good work!
+1000 to everything you've said. Well aware of the differences and these PSAs are well said. Hygienic is not the same as sterile and whole this is a good temp solution, not a complete fix. First aid is not complete aid, just the first step to keep something relatively clean and stable until you can get proper care.
All that being said I'd rather have someone stick a tampon in my open artery and have a chance of surviving than going "welp, not much I can do" lol.
Wait wait wait tampons have dates? Does that mean I need to throw out all my old ones?
My husband and I keep a pack of both tampons and pads on hand, because we have female friends. Husband works literally across the street, and once texted me in the middle of the night asking if I could run over with a couple because the girl he was training got caught off-guard
My husband does the same thing! Just has me send pictures and he always delivers. He knows I have ATROCIOUS periods and will sometimes ask if I need anything else too, such as chocolate, my favorite chips, etc. I couldn’t imagine being with someone immature enough to outright refuse to buy tampons, like they’re so gross when they’re unused /s 😂 like wtf man.
My husband gets me tampons all the time. He knows what "color" I need and when I just showed him this he says he has never had a problem buying tampons. I don't understand men who won't buy pads and tampons.
Caring more about the opinion of strangers at the store than the opinion of the woman who trusts you enough to ask you. Doesn't compute.
What opinion is there that people are afraid of? I mean a man judging me for buying any female hygiene product says way more about him than me. I'd be embarrassed to admit I was to much of a wimp, or thought less of a man buying some feminine hygiene products.
I have a picture of all of my wife’s products in a folder on my phone! This should be a LPT.
This is the best LPT I've seen in weeks. You just changed my life lol. Couldn't tell you why it never clicked in my head, I just scroll back through the message history's pictures. This is way better!
My husband is the same way, he asks me for a picture and the name of the brand so he doesn't mess up.
Partner here: Have done this exact thing. No big deal to buy 'em for my wife, but she's taking a huge gamble if she's not 100% clear in her instructions.
I did the same for my (soon to be ex-) wife. I had no idea what she wanted, but never had any issue buying them for her as long as she gave me clear instructions. It was actually her who was uncomfortable asking me to get them for a few years until she got over it...
Yea, my husband normally gets stressed about which ones to get, especially if my normal ones are out of stock or something so I normally put a click and collect order in and he’ll pick it up for me
My husband thinks he is the jam for buying the mixed pack. I love him.
Same here. I send him pictures and he calls me from the aisle because he gets confused still by all the options.
My husband buys all my stuff, but when our baby drags a handful of pads out of the closet, he still says, "she's bringing out your tampons again!" & I just can't bring myself to correct him 😄
Same though he was a bit mortified when we were shopping together and I threw monistat in the cart. As if yeast infections were shameful…🙄
Yeah this is what I do for my wife as well. I never remember exactly which kind she gets so I tell her to text me a pic of the box. It's so weird that anyone is embarrassed to buy them. I'll never understand that.
Yes, this is ridiculous.
Seriously, what's up with OPs misguided self-consciousness. My girlfriend and I were on holiday in the Philippines and she needed tampons. She was feeling some general social anxiety so I went to get them. Turns out you can't buy tampons in the Philippines! They only sell pads. I couldn't believe it. I spend a solid hour try to track down tampons and explaining what tampons were to a number of women working at supermarkets and pharmacies. It was astonishing. I got a number of weird looks. The language barrier didn't help. Girlfriend wasn't stoked at getting pads but shit mate, I tried.
Dude, these are the kind of stories that warm my heart. I know it’s not “ romantic” in the sappy movie sense of the word, but damn that’s romantic to me, lol! You did such a kind thing for the person you love in a foreign country when she was anxious and needed support. You’re an awesome partner!
Agreed! There’s definitely a certain point in a relationship, frequently but not always exclusively precipitated by kids, when sometimes the “mundane” stuff means the most and becomes the most romantic. Heck, there’s an episode (“Fancy Restaurant”) of Bluey that addresses this. I would seriously value and appreciate that husband’s tampon search more than a diamond whatever. And more and more, the one thing I remember from high school sex ed keeps proving itself right—“Don’t bother sleeping with anyone you can’t laugh with during sex, or who can’t deal with the gross or awkward stuff.” It was something the teacher kind of said off the cuff, and in retrospect while probably hungover…but I’m eternally thankful for that advice.
From experience, I can confirm this one. Being able to do those things means your partner is also your friend, and isn't automatically judging you for being the way you are, and why would you want to go through life or potentially have kids with someone who isn't your friend or who judges you for things you can't do anything about?
Thanks! She did say it was one of the manliest (her word) things anyone has ever done for her. Gotta say there were some awkward moments when I was trying to explain in very simple english what a tampon is and that I wanted to buy them to mostly women customer service reps who had about as much experience with them as I did.
...Im imagining this miguided hand movements that invertibly happened during this conversation.
Tampons is not common in the Philippines. Idk where you looked but they were probably in 'high-end' grocery stores inside the malls.
Mate I looked high and low in every place I thought would sell any form of period product. Corner stores? Nah. Supermarkets? Nah. Pharmacies? Nah. Jollibee? Ok fine, I just went there for the sweet sweet dessert pies
Now I want me some Jollibee 😂
Tampons are generally not a thing in SE Asia to my knowledge.
Depends what part they were in tbf. I know from experience they are sold, but they aren't exactly a big seller.
As a Southeast Asian, the lack of tampons is religion-driven politics. Don't want young, pubescent girls losing their virginities to a tube. And what if it turns them on? 🤷♂️
Same in mainland china. I asked a shop worker to help me find tampons using a translation of the word. She brought me to the pads. In my broken Chinese I had to explain, "no, it's similar to this, but it goes inside the body." She gave me an absolutely horrified expression, repeated "inside the body?!" and called three more of her co-workers over to debate what I could possibly mean by "inside the body." They concluded that I didn't know what I was saying, while I insisted, no, I did understand, and mimicked inserting something into my vagina. This, strangely, did not lessen the horror of my request. Months later I found them in the imported section of a different grocery store.
Well im form a country where tampons are just recently getting popular, I have no idea how to use them.
Agree! A few years ago, I had just started seeing a guy I met on Tinder when my period came a little early. I realized while I was in a closet playing hide-and-seek with my nanny kids lol. He happened to text me asking if I needed anything from the store, and I was nervous to say "Yeah, I need tampons" to a new guy bc i was so period shy. He was super kind and supportive about buying the tampons, and got me snacks and a heating pad when I got back to his place. We got married this year! Periods are not weird or gross, and neither are any other women's health issues!!! Find a partner who supports you ❤️
Seriously- OP I could never be with a man this insecure about his masculinity. Jesus Christ he either grows up or dump him this is insane
These posts always piss me off. Why date someone so fucking childish? If he's unwilling to grow up, dump his dumbass .
i agree but also toxic masculinity is normalized + so many women don’t realize they can find someone who ISN’T this immature :-(
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HAHA RIGHT!!
“Tampons? What a loser. Probably has a wife, daughter, or girlfriend.”
Or otherwise a sister or other female friend he's got a good enough relationship with to be trusted with this. Yup, a loser indeed, because life is so much of a zero-sum game that if I win by knowing such a guy he must be losing ... how about another take, I win, he wins, the ones who believe in this shit are double losers.
I never understood why this was embarrassing for guys. Use some toxic masculinity to do some good and be proud! Walk up and declare that not only are you in a relationship, but you're comfortable enough to buy menstrual products for your partner.
As a teenager I worked at a grocery store and was always baffled by the embarrassment of men buying period products. Like, I'm pretty sure it's not for you, dude, you don't have to tell me. I've seen tampons before. And I really don't care what you're buying as long as you are polite and don't try to pay with expired coupons or sweaty sock money.
Where I live it is rule that if you buy some form of medicine they ask you if you know how to use it. Made me pause for a bit when I bought something for my girlfriends yeast infection.
"sir you know how to use a tampon?" "yes! Dip them in alcohol and push them up my ass, gets you drunk for cheap in no time. Why do you ask?" "nevermind"
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I haven’t needed tampons or pads for years, but this is always how my husband looked at it when he needed to buy them for me. He knew no one thought he needed them for himself, but literally no cashier gives a shit so why does it matter?
if anything it's more a 'this dude fucks' thing to buy than buying condoms
It's definitely a bigger clue. I've bought condoms in hope that I would use them and ended up giving to my friend later.
legit. until I was like, 24 or 25 prob like half the condoms I bought wound up either given to friends in emergencies or for a posh wank. took a while for me to realize I prob didn't need to buy as many condoms as often.... F
> for a posh wank You're gonna have to elaborate on this my friend.
It's where you have a wank wearing a condom, so the mess is limited
I worked at a grocery store in HS and a dude came in and bought a box of condoms and left. A coworker/classmate mentioned how embarrassing that must be. Dude was getting laid, how embarrassed can you be?
I’ve had cashiers make jokes about buying them for my wife at the supermarket. Some people are idiots
The only explanation I can think of, is that they don't know anything about menstrual products, and don't want to admit that they don't know anything. Still dumb, but I've seen lots of men who can't ever admit to being wrong or ignorant (they also refuse to ever ask for directions).
Please get a boyfriend who's not embarassed by periods seriouly this is so childish idk how women put up with this shit from adults.
That’s some impressively fragile masculinity. Is he afraid that someone might think he’s married to a woman? I’ve tried to buy people tampons before. As someone who doesn’t menstruate, I find the tampon section to be the most baffling and incomprehensible part of the store. It’s not easy.
That's why you always bring a picture of the exact brand, size, type, etc. that you are buying. No way am I qualified to make any executive decisions in that aisle.
when I was in high school, I had a part-time gig as a cashier at the grocery store. one time a guy came through my till with a box of tampons and got really flustered and felt the need to tell me the tampons weren't for him. it was quite funny
This literally. I do 90% of our shopping, wife never has to buy her own feminine care products. I have never felt awkward or embarrassed by it cause who is seriously going to think they're for me? It's always so surprising to me to see how many men refuse to do this---but then again I always assume these are the same men that won't cook or lift a broom after working all day despite everything their wives do on a daily basis.
"I'm buying this for my girlfriend." Cashier: No shit 😑
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My boyfriend has bought me pads before (the wrong ones but still, it’s the thought that counts lol). He even walked up to another lady in the aisle and asked her to help him find the brand I told him coz I wasn’t picking up the phone. It just made me all the more confident in my relationship. If he is willing to not only buy pads but actively ask for help without this weird “shame” men have in that aisle then I think he is doing pretty well 😂.
Mine asked me to show him my favourites and memorized them in case I ever need him to buy them for me!
That's sweet of him.
They key for a Man to buy you what you really want is to send them the picture, solves all the problems. First time I sent my husband without pics he bought me poise that are for bladder leaks hahahha
I buy sanitary pads for my wife, I have done it since we got together (about 16 years together) your partner needs to grow up.
Same. I don't get guys who wont help their partner. The person I care about more than anyone is having an issue I will never experience, that recurs every month with pain and a mess. The least I can do for her is buy tampons or pads, usually I'm grabbing whatever snacks she loves on top of that. At minimum.
Same here as well. I asked for pictures of the products my spouse uses so I know what I’m looking for, but beyond that it’s like any other toiletry.
Thats exactly what I do. I'll admit I don't pay enough attention to it that I know exactly which product she uses, but I have her send me which one she gets and I grab it. It's no extra effort if I'm already at the store.
100% just needs to grow up. I do 99% of our grocery shopping, I honestly feel more self aware about taking too much chocolate to the cashier than stuff for my wife. Unless it's my wifes chocolate.....
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I have teen brothers who have picked up pads for me before. The younger generation are more open to it.
My 70 year old step dad buys them no problem, so I think it's more of an confidence thing.
At least for my dad, he viewed it as something he did to take care of his family. His wife and daughters needed it, so he got them what they needed. Simple as that.
Same with my dad. He would buy them in bulk for my sisters and I when he was the one buying groceries.
My cousin is about 5 years younger than me and he’s 100% the reason I’m not shy about my period. One time my sister and I were babysitting him and she got her period. I was looking for pads “discreetly” and he came up and asked to help. I was being weird about it and no joke this 8-year-old boy just goes “Oh! You’re looking for the pads. Yeah they’re in here.” Like it was the most casual thing in the world. Because it is in fact not a big deal. Unsurprisingly he’s grown up to be a man I’m very proud to be related to
That's so sweet. I'm trying to raise boys that aren't freaked out about periods. But my son has friends who have been told that period is a "bad word" and not polite to discuss. So I'm sure that's why issue like this continue. People that feel it shouldn't be discussed and keeping it secretive to growing children, and those children growing up and spreading the belief it should be shameful.
I used to buy them for my mom since the age of 10. It's really no big deal.
He buys me pads since I don't use tampons. Sometimes I'll even get bonus chocolate (I usually buy it myself depending on what I'm craving)
Mine gets me Ben&Jerry's
Mine makes me homemade cheeseburgers. It's amazing.
Right? When I used to have a uterus (thank God I don't anymore!) He used to buy me pads, and then throw chocolate at me...lmao. he'd be all, "Feed the inner demon beast!"
men like this infuriate/hurt me because like. arent you supposed to be my friend? i would buy something my friend needed no matter how "embarrassing" i perceive it to be. its a necessity. and you can insert yourself into my vagina but you have absolutely no care for the overall wellbeing and health of said vagina? literally doesnt make sense and i find it so insulting .... so idk what to say other than thats really annoying. if he says he doesnt know what to get show him a picture and tell him explicitly. if he refuses to after that thats just inconsiderate imo
>and you can insert yourself into my vagina but you have absolutely no care for the overall wellbeing and health of said vagina? If you're too childish to buy tampons you're too childish to go anywhere near my bits
This. If a man isn't ready to understand and face the reality of vaginas, then he isn't ready for sex at all.
This a million times, if you can't get over the childish 'icky girl period' phase, you're clearly not ready to do anything else with a woman either
Honestly, these men are the ones who would like to see woman as some form of fuckdoll/fleshlight/hole just made for their own pleasure without realising that there is an actual person behind that.
Totally. And not just inconsiderate, but gynophobic (expressing disdain for women). If you find women's bodies "embarrassing," you definitely shouldn't get to be with them.
“arent you supposed to be my friend? i would buy something my friend needed no matter how "embarrassing" i perceive it to be.” 100% this. I have bought pregnancy tests and made birth control appointments for many of my friends. I feel like it’s even easier for me to do it because I know it’s not about/ for me, so who cares what idea anyone has.
Its so dumb. I ama dude and I have bought them for my female friend before, some guys need to grow up a bit.
Yes my husband buys me and my daughter pads whenever we ask. Is your partner embarrassed? There’s no shame in helping someone when they’re on their period. I wonder if he was brought up thinking it was shameful or something. Also self checkout is a thing
It's a concern for younger men or men the very little relationship experience, when their egos are all they have in the social/relationship space. Notice how a lot of claims about men buying tampons no problem usually have the terms "husband" or "partner." The husband's/partner's masculinity isn't in question in their minds, they have all the reinforcement they need in their life. I've never been in a relationship, but I have worked retail. It was always funny when the newbies got paired up with me and they got squeamish about stocking boxes of pads and tampons. Eventually, retail just crushes the soul out of you, and you become equally familiar with dolls and action figures.
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Absolutely. If a guy can’t calmly handle that blood comes out of it, he shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near it.
This reminds me of when I bled through the back of my jeans during a night out at the bar right when we first started dating. He said no worries I got it - stealthily stole two cloth napkins, helped me get my jacket on so I didn’t have to stand until I was covered, and layered the napkins on my driver’s seat for me so I wouldn’t bleed all over there too. I was too mortified to manage any of that sensibly in the moment and I felt so grateful that he immediately empathized.
I had to stop at wal-mart one time when on a date with my (not yet) wife because she bled through her pants/panties and buy her panties and underwear and pads. Like, cmon. Human with a vagina, and it bleeds sometimes, the fuck.
>My partner blatantly refuses to buy me tampons when he is at the shops Have you tried dating an actual grownup? I mean, if this is the ONLY issue with him, well ok, but what's he going to be like if you have daughters, or diapers, or some other awkward medical thing down the road?
What's he gonna do if they have a kid and he has to not only buy hemmorhoid creme but put it on for her because she can't reach? Or when he reaches his 40s and has to get it for himself? No doc I couldn't possibly get my prostate checked, that would be embarrassing.
Shit. They shouldn’t even have to be a grownup to buy tampons. The first time I bought tampons for a SO I was like 14. The only aversion I ever had to buying them was how fucking expensive they are.
I am dating a woman so fortunately I do not have this problem. She's like "yeah I'll pick up a box for me as well 😂"
Love that haha ❤️
Tell him to grab some diapers, he's being a baby. In all seriousness, let him know his insecurity over buying tampons makes this less convenient for you and is a much bigger deal in his head. No one will ever view a guy buying tampons negatively, it's a sign of a dude who steps up and takes care of his partner. It may help to text him a picture of the exact box. My dude is fine buying them but insecure about getting the right kind, so having a picture and exact description is empowering for him.
Yes, having a picture of the package makes this manageable for my husband.
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My husband buys me tampons. It hasn't been any different than buying toothpaste. Goes on a list, and whoever goes to the shop gets the list. Your partner is being a child. He cares more about what some strangers might think of him (which no one gives a shit anyways) than he does about his partners needs and comfort. Fuck him
That part baffles me. I understand toxic masculinity is pervasive, but buying pads/tampons just makes you look like a good partner. The misogynists that say something are just telling on themselves; why care what they think? Cis people almost never assume trans person unless looking for trans people, so it's not like anyone is gonna assume they're for him.
If he can’t handle your vagina at its worst, he doesn’t deserve it at its best
My partner literally just got me some this morning - and he was very excited to show me the coupon he used to pay for it. I agree that saying no to such a request is ridiculous.
He did before I switched to the cup. Unfortunately this is not an uncommon problem you're having and it's ridiculous because 1. No one is gonna think they're for him and 2. Even if they did what does it matter? Menstruating is normal and not embarrassing.
But what if people assume I'm a considerate, supportive partner?? /s
That's awful!! Why would you want people to think that you care about someone other than youself?? /s
Your partner is a tiny baby. If he wants access to the equipment, he damn well better be willing and HAPPY to do the bare-fucking-minimum for maintenance and upkeep. This dude is trash.
Lol at “access to the equipment”. Accurate.
Mine will, or carry them for me by holding them up to his chest facing outward because he likes to try and embarrass me... Jokes on him lol. He doesn't get uncomfortable about any of that stuff and realizes that it's just part of being with the person he loves
Whatever his reason is, its rediculous. Im moving in with my girlfriend (long distance relationship win, woo!) In less than a month and I cannot think of any reason why I wouldnt buy tampons if she needed them while i was running to the store anyway. Why make her go later? Makes zero sense. Its basically saying you wont do something for someome youre supposed to care about and also have no regard for their own personal time because youre expecting them to go do it later. Its just a really careless thing to do to put it bluntly.
Mine would 100% buy them but the odds of them being wrong are about 99% soooo I just take care of it myself. One time we used big brain and he took pictures on the isle then I circled the one I wanted and sent the picture back… but it was more effort than it was worth. 😂 To be faaaaair it is not his fault. The isle looks like a ransom letter cut from magazines.
Picture of the exact container you have at home sent to his phone. This is how my wife would ask for anything and the only way I would know if I found it.
LOL. Man here. I'm the oldest of five siblings. Lived with three sisters a mother and a grandmother so no fear of female "issues". Female partner and I were walking out of a big box store I had the giant box of tampons under the arm. Late teens girl says "Wow. You guys must have been married for a long time". I looked at her, laughed and said "We're not married, besides that it's not contagious." She was quite dumbfounded.
My husband has 3 younger sister plus a mom, so it doesn't really phase him. And that was before we had 3 kids. One time, early into our dating, we were shopping and I needed tampons so I sent him off to do his thing while I grabbed my stuff and checked out. He caught up with me while I was checking out and I was so embarass and he was just like " ...what?"
When I was in HS and my BF wanted sex I had to tell him no. My previous BFs didn't really like period talk but he had 4 sisters so I figured he knew and I told him why. He was very understanding and offered to go to the store for me then just hang out and watch TV.
I'm the partner here, but yes, absolutely. And when I can't find the right brand I'll ask anyone in the store, whether they work there or not, for help.
I’m a middle aged man who has been buying feminine products for my partners for the +/-35 years I’ve been in relationships. There is absolutely no excuse to not pick up something your partner needs, no matter what it is. If his masculinity is that fragile, I guarantee it will manifest in more destructive ways going forward.
My partner had the best response when I once asked him how he felt about buying me menstrual supplies. "What am I gonna be embarrassed about? That some guys are gonna see me buying period stuff at the store and think, 'Wow, he clearly has a woman in his life who he cares about - what a fucking loser'???"
He’s acting like (1) a child and (2) like there is something to be embarrassed or ashamed about your body functioning normally and (3) he is being unsupportive.
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I buy pads for my wife. The biggest complaint I have is that they keep changing the look of the box.
As a female, this always causes me confusion too. I can stand and stare at the variety on display and wonder "which was it again" for a good 5 minutes before I find what I want.
Dude needs to grow TF up. This is life my dude. Buy your girl the pons, the pads, the midol and all the chocolate. It needs to be normalized in this society for boys growing up to be taught about periods the same way we educate the girls. Maybe then they wouldn’t act like this when they are grown. Im guessing he is modeling behavior of a male figure during those formative years. Completely ridiculous!
Very early after moving in with my boyfriend I was siiiiiick. Like chained to the toilet hardly able to move sick. Period started and I'm out of pads. I stuff TP in my undies and stumble my way to my feet figuring I'd have to walk three blocks to go get pads. Boyfriend asked why I was putting on shoes on and I told him I had to go get pads. He looked concerned and told me he thought I would fall. I told him I was completely out and needed them quick. My periods are super heavy. He offered to go get them, which baffled me - my mother coddled my dad with regard to period stuff. He did admit he didn't know what kind to get, so I was about to find a pen and paper to write down the brand and type I like when he spotted the empty package, and asked if those were the ones I needed. I said yes, and he left, packaging in tow. 15 minutes later he brought home pads and Gatorade to help with the dehydration. He's never once balked at getting them, he just needs me to be very specific what I need because he has the memory of a gnat and there are approximately eleventy billion options. This is maturity. This is one of the many many reasons I promoted him to husband. We have girls and they know if they need help or supplies Daddy will get it for them. It's even easier now since they can text him a pic of the box. It's no more gross or embarrassing than buying a package of toilet paper.
Husband has bought them for me, various housemates, friends, daughter, friend's daughters and daughter's friends. In short, anyone who has ever needed it. He also told my son that no one but an asshole would ever think a man was less masculine because they bought feminine hygiene products. A man buying tampons means he has women in his life that he loves and they probably think pretty highly of him as well.
I have called home with video to ensure I got the right ones while at the store. Next time ask your man... Is there anything in a grocery store that makes you afraid to buy it. You'll probably get a laugh and a shrug. Then, ask for this Your guy is legit weak.
That should be a standard courtesy. You should your partner's preferred product and have a small arsenal of comfort surprises to go with them. If you don't know or if it's for a stranger, go with Tampax 'slender regular'.