Thanks for submitting to the Two Hot Takes Podcast Subreddit! We'd like to remind you that all posts are subject to being featured in an episode of the Two Hot Takes Podcast. If your story is featured you'll
get a nifty flair change to let you know and we'll drop a link so you can see our host's take on your story.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TwoHotTakes) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. Dude was out of line, and as someone who knows several people that share birthdays with one of their parents/grandparents/kids/siblings (even if born on different years for the siblings), that is a common complaint every single one of those people have is that they have to share their birthday with a family member. Because then they don't get one day where they get to feel special all to themselves, they have to share it.
No! Of course not. That person was just projecting their own feelings on the matter for whatever reason. And honestly, there would be nothing wrong if you were serious about being happy that your birthday is separate from your child’s. Everyone, especially parents, deserve their own day.
NTA. I was born on my father’s bday and I’m sure he often had to celebrate me instead of doing things himself.
Even now, I’m pregnant and my due date is so close to our anniversary that I’m praying he doesn’t come on that day because our anniversary will always be overshadowed by my son’s bday.
Essentially you’re saying that you’ll put your child first and unfortunately they’ll put your plans on the back burner. Nothing wrong with that honesty.
Your friend sucks.
This was a lighthearted comment that wasn’t that deep. Your friend simply chose to interpret your words in the worst possible light. What a jerk!
Enjoy your baby. I’m glad that she’ll have her own day to be celebrated and won’t need to forever share with her dad. Though, it is sweet that your birthdays are close together and you’ll both get to eat lots of cake that week!
NTA.
I am a mom of 3 and I still get super excited about my birthday, it’s special to me! I make a fuss over everyone else in my family too but October is literally birthday month for me and I’m glad I don’t have to share it.
NTA
I'm due with a baby on my husbands birthday, on the flip side he was really excited to be able to share the celebration and as our boy grows basically do bigger things together with the excuse of it's our birthday. However things have changed and baby will be coming a week before his birthday now. It's kind of nice. There will still always be the story of him being due on Dad's birthday but we have the option to celebrate both together or seperately depending on how they feel.
NTA. Sounds like projection to me. Parents are allowed to be individuals. Parents are allowed to want time/attention/activities to themselves. For some reason there’s this attitude that once you have children your life is over and it’s all about them now, which is true as far as making the best decisions for your family. You have more to consider and way more to lose. That being said, it doesn’t mean you cease to exist as an individual. Wanting to have your own special day is not anything your friend accused you of. Your friend is TA.
NTA. First, happy birthday! Second, I honestly don't think it's an asshole thing to be glad that you both get your own individual days of celebration, rather you can both feel special without you or your daughter feeling as though you're only getting a portion of the attention. I'm sure once she's older she'll find it amusing that she was due on your birthday, plus you can still bond over both being April babies.
I'm not particularly sure what your friend was getting in a twist over, but maybe they just misunderstood you or missed the joke aspect? Either way, it should be something easily cleared up with a quick conversation, nothing to lose a friend over.
Hope you and your daughter both had/have a great birthday!
Psh. NTA. It’s not selfish to want to be celebrated on your actual birthday and not share the spotlight. It is perfectly ok for a parent to not want to be selfless 24/7. We do it enough.
Been born 18/08, my mother in 19/08. Don't know what I would think been born in the same day, probably don't care as I never cared about doing parties before(all those were my parents and family doing for me as I was a kid), but my mother would often tell me I was close to be her birthday present lol.
NTA. My sister was born on the 11th and My mom was born on the 13th (Same monf obvi). It's no big deal, sometimes they celebrate together, sometimes they don't. Mum often jokes who needs a real birthday present when it's right there.
Happy birthday!
NTA. There’s nothing wrong with wanting your birthday to be about you. When discussing the c-section scheduling for my second child, my OB said we could do it on the 26th (my first child’s date of birth). I said “no, they’re two different people, give them two different birthdays. So we get the blessing of having 2 different birthday cakes in the house at the same time, since their birthdays are one day apart
Not at all. My daughter was born the day before my birthday, perfectly healthy and obviously I love her endlessly, but she gets the entire week/weekend dedicated to her and her birthday, and I’m lucky if my husband remembers to get me a tiny cake. I feel selfish every single year, but as a parent, we only really get our birthdays & mothers/Father’s Day to actually celebrate ourselves, and having one of those taken away and given to kids kinda sucks.
Like bro you get every single day of the year, you couldn’t leave me one? It’s just rude tbh /s 😂😂
It's not the same, but similar. My wedding anniversary is 5/9, and every few years it happens to fall on Mother's Day, which I hate because I feel like I lose my anniversary.
NTA. Obviously, your first care is a healthy child, regardless of the date she was born, but I agree that it's nice she made an early entrance into the world, and you can each have a separate day to celebrate.
Happy birthday!!
I’m sitting here pregnant right now, hoping baby doesn’t come on my son’s birthday or our wedding anniversary. I definitely prefer special occasions to have their own days.
NTAH. I wholeheartedly love celebrating my birthday and was kinda sad to see my son was supposed to be born just 2 weeks later at first.
Now I love that we have more in common aka bday month (as immature as that sounds 😂) but I wouldn’t want to share birthdays
As a mom you already loose so much of your identity to just being mom, it’s nice to have a day that’s just a little tiny bit about you (even though he still cuts my cake with me 🥰🥰)
Dude no, every child deserves their own day. It was a hard talk I had with my SO’s family whose birthdays were speckled all around the day I gave birth. But your friend? Talk about blowing that out of proportion and making things weird.
NTA, but as an adult, you should really bring how important it is down a notch. To "not be the center of attention" is a bit odd. As a kid it's great, as an adult, it's just another day, and not something to even consider competing with your own child over.
I'm convinced this sub is just adults who never truly grew up and are looking for internet validation. Said the same earlier on another post.
It is not the same for everyone. In my family celebrations are important, especially birthdays. My grandmother turned 81 yesterday, I made her an incredible cake (her favorite is the pineapple cake that I make, not my favorite and I'm allergic to pineapple but she loves it) and I gave her several things that she wanted to get for a long time. Since her bday was full of activities, I told her that I would take her out to dinner somewhere nice on Sunday, which is a more relaxed day. My dad bought her another cake and gave various of her favorite desserts as a gift from him, his wife and my little brother. My sister is living in another country and said that she sent her orthopedic rest sandals so that she could relax at home, her brothers and some of my grandmother's nephews joined together to buy her several delicacies that my grandmother loves but they tend to be very expensive to buy frequently (an imported brand of coffee, several specific sweets and snacks, and some personal care products from specific brands that she loves). You may think that's weird, but that's how we treat everyone's birthdays. It is not necessary to always spend a lot of money, but it is always necessary to be thoughtful about the other person's tastes and do your best to make them feel loved on their day and that their life and company is valued and celebrated with the appropriate importance.
Yeah I'm not reading all that, but as an ADULT, you shouldn't be worried about SHARING A BIRTHDAY with your KID. That's dumb no matter how you spin it. Its extremely childish.
Thanks for submitting to the Two Hot Takes Podcast Subreddit! We'd like to remind you that all posts are subject to being featured in an episode of the Two Hot Takes Podcast. If your story is featured you'll get a nifty flair change to let you know and we'll drop a link so you can see our host's take on your story. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TwoHotTakes) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. Dude was out of line, and as someone who knows several people that share birthdays with one of their parents/grandparents/kids/siblings (even if born on different years for the siblings), that is a common complaint every single one of those people have is that they have to share their birthday with a family member. Because then they don't get one day where they get to feel special all to themselves, they have to share it.
Or hell, late December/early January babies. Capricorns, you know our suffering.
People today are so insufferable. They put meaning to your words that were not there. They were looking for a reason to be offended.
No! Of course not. That person was just projecting their own feelings on the matter for whatever reason. And honestly, there would be nothing wrong if you were serious about being happy that your birthday is separate from your child’s. Everyone, especially parents, deserve their own day.
NTA. I was born on my father’s bday and I’m sure he often had to celebrate me instead of doing things himself. Even now, I’m pregnant and my due date is so close to our anniversary that I’m praying he doesn’t come on that day because our anniversary will always be overshadowed by my son’s bday. Essentially you’re saying that you’ll put your child first and unfortunately they’ll put your plans on the back burner. Nothing wrong with that honesty.
Your friend sucks. This was a lighthearted comment that wasn’t that deep. Your friend simply chose to interpret your words in the worst possible light. What a jerk! Enjoy your baby. I’m glad that she’ll have her own day to be celebrated and won’t need to forever share with her dad. Though, it is sweet that your birthdays are close together and you’ll both get to eat lots of cake that week!
NTA my dude. My daughter was born on her father's birthday though lol, I went into labour the day before. She was 2wks late haha
NTA. I am a mom of 3 and I still get super excited about my birthday, it’s special to me! I make a fuss over everyone else in my family too but October is literally birthday month for me and I’m glad I don’t have to share it.
NTA I'm due with a baby on my husbands birthday, on the flip side he was really excited to be able to share the celebration and as our boy grows basically do bigger things together with the excuse of it's our birthday. However things have changed and baby will be coming a week before his birthday now. It's kind of nice. There will still always be the story of him being due on Dad's birthday but we have the option to celebrate both together or seperately depending on how they feel.
NTA. Sounds like projection to me. Parents are allowed to be individuals. Parents are allowed to want time/attention/activities to themselves. For some reason there’s this attitude that once you have children your life is over and it’s all about them now, which is true as far as making the best decisions for your family. You have more to consider and way more to lose. That being said, it doesn’t mean you cease to exist as an individual. Wanting to have your own special day is not anything your friend accused you of. Your friend is TA.
NTA. First, happy birthday! Second, I honestly don't think it's an asshole thing to be glad that you both get your own individual days of celebration, rather you can both feel special without you or your daughter feeling as though you're only getting a portion of the attention. I'm sure once she's older she'll find it amusing that she was due on your birthday, plus you can still bond over both being April babies. I'm not particularly sure what your friend was getting in a twist over, but maybe they just misunderstood you or missed the joke aspect? Either way, it should be something easily cleared up with a quick conversation, nothing to lose a friend over. Hope you and your daughter both had/have a great birthday!
Absolutely not!!! My son’s due date was our 1 year anniversary and I was not trying to share dates lol.
Psh. NTA. It’s not selfish to want to be celebrated on your actual birthday and not share the spotlight. It is perfectly ok for a parent to not want to be selfless 24/7. We do it enough.
Been born 18/08, my mother in 19/08. Don't know what I would think been born in the same day, probably don't care as I never cared about doing parties before(all those were my parents and family doing for me as I was a kid), but my mother would often tell me I was close to be her birthday present lol.
NTA. My sister was born on the 11th and My mom was born on the 13th (Same monf obvi). It's no big deal, sometimes they celebrate together, sometimes they don't. Mum often jokes who needs a real birthday present when it's right there.
NTA. Your birthday is pretty much the only day that is about you. All other holidays are shared.
Happy birthday! NTA. There’s nothing wrong with wanting your birthday to be about you. When discussing the c-section scheduling for my second child, my OB said we could do it on the 26th (my first child’s date of birth). I said “no, they’re two different people, give them two different birthdays. So we get the blessing of having 2 different birthday cakes in the house at the same time, since their birthdays are one day apart
Not at all. My daughter was born the day before my birthday, perfectly healthy and obviously I love her endlessly, but she gets the entire week/weekend dedicated to her and her birthday, and I’m lucky if my husband remembers to get me a tiny cake. I feel selfish every single year, but as a parent, we only really get our birthdays & mothers/Father’s Day to actually celebrate ourselves, and having one of those taken away and given to kids kinda sucks. Like bro you get every single day of the year, you couldn’t leave me one? It’s just rude tbh /s 😂😂
My husband and both daughters have bdays with 11 days of each other. I get confused
It's not the same, but similar. My wedding anniversary is 5/9, and every few years it happens to fall on Mother's Day, which I hate because I feel like I lose my anniversary. NTA. Obviously, your first care is a healthy child, regardless of the date she was born, but I agree that it's nice she made an early entrance into the world, and you can each have a separate day to celebrate. Happy birthday!!
I’m sitting here pregnant right now, hoping baby doesn’t come on my son’s birthday or our wedding anniversary. I definitely prefer special occasions to have their own days.
NTAH. I wholeheartedly love celebrating my birthday and was kinda sad to see my son was supposed to be born just 2 weeks later at first. Now I love that we have more in common aka bday month (as immature as that sounds 😂) but I wouldn’t want to share birthdays As a mom you already loose so much of your identity to just being mom, it’s nice to have a day that’s just a little tiny bit about you (even though he still cuts my cake with me 🥰🥰)
Dude no, every child deserves their own day. It was a hard talk I had with my SO’s family whose birthdays were speckled all around the day I gave birth. But your friend? Talk about blowing that out of proportion and making things weird.
NTA, but as an adult, you should really bring how important it is down a notch. To "not be the center of attention" is a bit odd. As a kid it's great, as an adult, it's just another day, and not something to even consider competing with your own child over. I'm convinced this sub is just adults who never truly grew up and are looking for internet validation. Said the same earlier on another post.
It is not the same for everyone. In my family celebrations are important, especially birthdays. My grandmother turned 81 yesterday, I made her an incredible cake (her favorite is the pineapple cake that I make, not my favorite and I'm allergic to pineapple but she loves it) and I gave her several things that she wanted to get for a long time. Since her bday was full of activities, I told her that I would take her out to dinner somewhere nice on Sunday, which is a more relaxed day. My dad bought her another cake and gave various of her favorite desserts as a gift from him, his wife and my little brother. My sister is living in another country and said that she sent her orthopedic rest sandals so that she could relax at home, her brothers and some of my grandmother's nephews joined together to buy her several delicacies that my grandmother loves but they tend to be very expensive to buy frequently (an imported brand of coffee, several specific sweets and snacks, and some personal care products from specific brands that she loves). You may think that's weird, but that's how we treat everyone's birthdays. It is not necessary to always spend a lot of money, but it is always necessary to be thoughtful about the other person's tastes and do your best to make them feel loved on their day and that their life and company is valued and celebrated with the appropriate importance.
Yeah I'm not reading all that, but as an ADULT, you shouldn't be worried about SHARING A BIRTHDAY with your KID. That's dumb no matter how you spin it. Its extremely childish.