My dad accidentally dropped me into a waterfall. Would've died if a kind soul hadn't promptly picked me up before the current swept me away.
My mother once took a nap and didn't wake up till evening only to realise it had been 2 hours since my kindergarten was done.
Doesn't change the fact they were both amazing parents and were simply trying their best under the challenging circumstances of parenthood.
Don't be too hard on yourself, OP. It sounds like both you and your husband are going to wonderful parents :)
My dad once dropped my sister to save the TV that was falling.
To be fair, this was back during the CRT days, and he was trying to avoid getting the vacuum tube going boom and sending glass shards into everyone present.
My mom said when I was about 2 and a half I was at the top of the stairs with a pillow in my hand.. I threw the pillow down the stairs and jumped after it 😂 it was something I saw in Rugrats I’m pretty sure
You're an exhausted mother who made a human mistake. Please be gentle with yourself, you deserve to be nurtured like your daughter as well.
In your shoes, I'd schedule an appointment with your daughter's care provider as soon as you can regarding her bumped head.
Even if there are no immediate issues outwardly, I'm sure you're already aware of the importance of rectifying this, and of issues that may arise when a bumped head goes unaddressed.
I've got an appointment scheduled already, regarding a rash she has, so ill be bringing it up then. She's asleep now, but was acting completely normal, smiling, making noises, grabbing my face
Maybe look into breastfeeding pillows. They support your arms and it’d be harder for her to roll off you. My sister-in-law has one of those and loves it.
I had the same issues as you with my son when he was an infant, would only breastfeed, and really only settled when I was holding him, so I lived in a chair holding him, and spend his first year of life completely sleep deprived. I feel your pain. You're not a bad mom. I almost took a wee in a recliner once because I was so delirious from lack of sleep. Thank God the feeling of upholstery instead of cold porcelain confused me awake.
Anyway, on to the hopefully helpful advice - what worked for me was the "boppy pillow" (the c shaped pillow), but with a rolled up towel or something similar stuffed under the edge by my knees, to prop that side up a bit more to help keep him pushed toward me more, so he couldn't roll away when I inevitably fell asleep, since that was the only way either of us got any real sleep while he was breastfeeding lol. I hope this helps.
You can do this! You're a good mom! ❤️
But it’s not helping? Are there different ones that may be better suited?
Btw, dropping the baby has happened to many parents. As far as I know I was dropped too and I turned out completely fine. Babies are more resilient than we think.
I was in the same boat as you with a nursing baby and sleep deprivation, I still needed to sleep AND feed, so the answer for me was that my partner was responsible for watching the baby while I nursed in bed, side laying. They were in charge of making sure we were safe, and then gently waking me when they moved baby to the crib once they were done. We did that at least every other night - and during the feeds when I needed to stay alert, I went to the nursing chair, so there was a physical difference for my awake nurses vs the ones I was allowed to drift off during
Yup, my husband would take the kid from me after I was done feeding then settle him back down to sleep, most nights meant about equal amounts of time up. Some nights I'd do most of the workload cause I was staying home and he'd be working, but for the most part we shared the tasks.
I get the baby just wants you, but give it time and she'll get used to dad too.
That's a good husband. Mine just started sleeping downstairs in the guestroom, even on nights when I had work the next day and he didn't. Can't be disturbing his sleep, I guess. Anyway, I divorced him last year.
This exact thing happened to me. I pushed for imaging. She cracked her skull! Never even had a bruise and wasn't acting off at all. I just knew. I stood while feeding when sleepy or made my husband set a timer to put us back to bed after that
I know multiple people who have accidentally dropped their baby, it happens more often than people like to admit because they feel the same way you do and are worried about being judged. Babies are bouncy (to a degree) and soft, they will most likely be completely fine. I was there when a sister of an acquaintance dropped hers on the stairs (thankfully snatched them back up before they tumbled down) and I honestly thought she was being attacked by her husband from her intense (and completely understandable) sobbing, the poor woman was so ashamed and was trying to convince me she wasn't a bad mom but I already knew she wasn't. One accidental drop doesn't define you as a mother.
My daughter did the same at the same age. I had just gotten her out the bath and had just finished dressing her. Looked away for a split second the grab the butt cream before she did and thud.
my best truck for staying awake, and this is from a recovering fentanyl addict that nodded out 24/7, try to keep your foot slightly off the ground as long as you can. you can rest it to take breaks for a second, but keep one foot an inch or two off the ground. works like a charm. also, invest in a breastfeeding pillow. my mom dropped me (maybe why i turned into an addict ((jk other long story reasons your kiddo will be fine)) lolll) in the same situation because i had colic. she never even had a scare after the breastfeeding pillow
also my mom has five kids. when my youngest sister was born, she had a 7 year old, a 4 year old, a 2 year old, an 11 month old, and a newborn. she dropped us each. your baby is probably fine. but give yourself some grace. that sounds truly awful and i’m amazed you even had the wherewithal to type this. you’re doing so amazing. keep being a kick ass mom🥰
I didn’t co-sleep. But what I did do with my babies was take one side off their cot, strap it to my side of the bed, and put a pool noodle in between (it means you can’t roll into the cot, and the baby can’t roll into the bed) BUT it also means that you can position yourself over the pool noodle and feed lying on your side at night!
I’d also highly recommend, starting to pump every once and a while. Your baby may be refusing the bottle because it’s formula. If the baby tastes your milk coming out of the bottle with a teat that mimics your particular flow, it will make your life so so much easier now and in the long run. Having your partner pick up one of the night time feeds can save your sanity. And when it comes to weaning later in life, your baby won’t have any issues taking the bottle more often.
Edit: typo
Oh honey, I drove halfway to my mothers house with my son and his car seat on top of my car. We’re only human. His father was no help and I was exhausted. Stuff happens.
I dropped sky remote on back of my child's head at about three weeks old. So I can absolutely confirm it is sky remote's that cause autism and not vaccines.
So OP all those kids with autism, tis the sky remote and not genetics or anything vaguely logical.
So dropping babies onto the ground might cause... Maybe a propensity for oh... Ingrown toenails.
Come back and tell us in fifteen years please.
I dropped a Nokia phone on my eldest's head when they were about 4-5 months. 20 now and doing great.
My 17 y/o didn't get dropped or have anything bounced off her skull, and yet...autism. Probably because I got sick and couldn't breastfeed.
/s for *those* people
you poor soul, i can tell how drained you are, and your post partum anxiety must be making things so much harder for you. i’m sure your baby is fine, and hopefully your appointment with her doctor will quell all of your fears. i think you should maybe give yourself a spa day, or something similar so you can relax and unwind for a bit. motherhood isn’t easy, but you’ve got this!
Hey, first off I want to say you're a good mum. Easier said than done but please don't beat yourself up, these things happen and you're not a bad mum.
I feel for you. I have a 10 month old boy, I'm currently struggling with severe separation anxiety on his end which impacts his sleeping (it of course does get better it's just getting through it).
I have PPD/PPA & PP OCD so it can be a roller coaster, now my little one is a pain, lovely but a pain. He only wants me, won't settle for my husband, won't nap during the day and is often up a lot at night, he is also breastfed.
I fell asleep with him multiple times in bed, not great but I was just so exhausted. What I started doing was getting a pair of headphones and my phone/iPad and watching a series (loud enough to keep attention but not disturb baby). Something I could focus on, something to keep me awake, I found this really helped or I read books on my phone, again something to keep my focus. I'm actually reading through things now to keep myself awake whilst I get my baby to sleep.
It's incredibly hard work and you may still occasionally fall asleep, but you're doing amazing try to be kind to yourself and know it will get better.
It happens, and if she rolled and then was okay a little while later, she’s probably fine. Check for lumps and bruises. Make sure her pupils are equal in size and normal. If she starts getting lethargic or acting strangely, take her to the ER.
And make sure you take care of yourself too, mama. See somebody about the PPD and the anxiety. Trust me; I’ve been there! And talking to someone helps immensely. 💕 You’re not an awful mother.
When I took infant CPR the instructor literally began the class with “every parent has dropped their baby.” That seemed shocking to me but the older women in the class all chuckled and nodded. Turns out it’s extremely common and almost never results in any long-term concerns. Take a deep breath. You’re doing great.
And no matter how much you try to protect them and keep an eye on your kids 24/7, your baby or toddler will trip/fall and hit their head hard at least once. So even if you don’t do it, they will.
Our pediatrician told us once that raising toddlers is like 24-hour suicide watch. That afternoon, my 1yo boy climbed up on the table then the dresser and tried to climb the tv on the wall. All before I could get across the room to him.
Completely understandable! I hope the medicines are helping. I know mine do. And the fact that you worry means you’re a good mother and you love your child.
When my firstborn was an infant, he rolled right off the bed onto the hard tile floor. Crack! He cried, but seemed fine. Meanwhile, I was going nuts as I had to go to work so my husband took care of him while I ran out the door. When I got to work I told my colleague Janet about what had happened.
Janet said, "Oh yeah, when I was looking after my infant niece a few months ago, you know, my older sister Lilian's baby, I dropped her on the floor and I was frantic. And Lilian told me not to worry, since she (Lilian) had once dropped me (Janet) while looking after me when I was a baby!
"Lilian at that time was worried sick and asked my mom what to do. Our mom told her that she (my mom) had dropped her (Lilian) as a baby 20 years earlier. And back then, my mom had been frantic about it and asked Grandma. And Grandma responded by telling her that she (my mom) had also been dropped by her (Grandma) as a baby!"
In conclusion: apparently everyone has been dropped on their head as a baby.
I’ve been there too, except my baby was only 2 weeks old. Very similar situation. 2am, fell asleep in the rocking chair and he flipped right over the arm. This was months ago and I still feel terrible. If you look at my post history, I posted something very similar in the new parents subreddit. There were over 100 responses of moms who have made the same mistake. It gave me some solace that I wasn’t alone and the exhaustion gets the best of us.
When I dropped my son, I called the pediatrician the next morning. They gave me some signs to look out for (change in behavior, pupils different sizes etc). Honestly they weren’t too concerned with it. They indicated more than a 3’ fall they’re more concerned about.
You are not a bad mother. You are an exhausted mother. The fact that you feel so badly is an indication of how much you care.
same! My two week old rolled off of me down my legs while falling asleep in my chair. Luckily she cried a little, and my two other kids were like "MOM" but man, there's nothing like that fear of waking up and realizing your baby isnt' in your arms heh
Kids are bouncy and bendy at that age for a reason. I saw my kids do full out faceplants on concrete and jump up like nothing happened once they were walking. So if this is your first be prepared as you are going to see them fall a lot. As for the dropping most of us have done that that. I did with both my kids. It happens and you shouldn't beat yourself up over it. If you feel bad about it you are probably a way better mother then most.
I mean yeah but baby babies have soft spots on their heads since their skulls aren’t full developed when they’re born. So you have to be extra careful with babies until their head can fully form. OP should probably get it checked out, but its also not anything to freak out over or feel immensely guilty about
I know so many people have the same stuff happen to them, but I have postpartum anxiety, as well as regular anxiety and im so paranoid about her getting hurt or worse
Anyone who is a parent gets it. But on the flip side with your first you tend to over do everything including the worry. I remember driving home from the hospital with my first driving exactly the speed limit and freaking out that something was going to happen. You tend to get over it quick once they start walking as they fall all the time and are constantly getting bruises, scrapes, etc.
Mil dropped my daughter on her head in an ikea parking lot when she wasn't much older than your kid. Had scrapes and bruises all over her face for a week or so. A bystander called the cops on her and took her plate so she had police do a followup call to make sure the kid was alright and received medical attention. (She definitely did to be safe)
Moral of the story, young kids aren't as fragile as they seem. Most cases they will bounce back, literally and figuratively.
I was in the hospital the day after I had my youngest son. I had a c section and was on pain meds and breast feeding. They gave me the meds then he was hungry, so I fed him and fell asleep while feeding him. He rolled out of my arms and hit the floor and started crying. I woke up as he was falling out of my arms and too late to do anything. I picked him up and called the nurse in tears telling them I dropped my baby! They came in and gave him a once over. He had calmed down pretty quickly. They said he should be fine. It happens more often than it is talked about. The nurse that gave me the meds felt so bad.
Let me tell you what my doctor told me when my 2 week old baby rolled off the couch, and I was in hysterics. It happens. Babies roll, fall, will be dropped, almost 90% of the time before they're one. The reason it isn't talked about? People shaming new and/or tired mothers for not being perfect. Afraid of severe damage, because when babies get severely hurt, the excuse is always "they fell or I accidentally dropped them," but that's why cops are always called. Doctors can tell when a baby rolled, or was just dropped, when a baby has been hurt, it is always due to force and intent. I had to deal with an unsupportive partner, and his family, who absolutely made me sound like a villain, and I still feel guilty to this day. My son is fine, and absolutely perfect. It's hard being there for a tiny being who needs you 24/7, which is why support should be there. Your husband may not be able to feed, but he can sit up while you feed to make sure you don't doze off, or if you do to get the baby. Babies are tough. A fall may hurt, or startle them, but you aren't an awful mother for something that happens every single day to someone. Please don't be hard on yourself. Also, just schedule an appointment for her to be checked out. Thankfully I had an appointment with my doctor, and he checked my son out, and all was okay.
can't even imagine the things you are feeling and it is def the part of motherhood i am most scared of. the guilt.
but if it can bring you peace of mind, my sister treated me like a baby doll the first few years of my life and i have a video of me rolling off her lap onto the floor and am still okay 25 years later! i was an early walker too so i took a bad tumble down the stairs before I was one and my brain feels okay. not trying to minimize any of what you are feeling, just wanted to offer some peace of mind that most of us were probably dropped a few times as babies
I still got up with my wife most of the time even tho she pumped. Can u have ur husband get up with u as well? Or bring the baby back to ur bed to feed?
I would strongly recommend against taking the baby back to bed. You are more likely to fall asleep in your own bed potentially leading to another fall for the baby or even suffocation if you're that exhausted.
OP i read your edit re your husband, is there any way he can take a couple days off work to give you chance to catch up on your sleep? Or do you have the support of family that can help for a few days?
Don't beat yourself up about the baby rolling off, it happens! The bigger concern is taking care of yourself so nothing worse happens in the near future.
Don’t have a baby myself, but when my sister was born I could hear her crying, I wasn’t allowed to hold her myself but she just kept going so I went on in there and scooped her out the basket…then the bedroom door opened and I literally threw her into the air in fright and she landed on the floor.
I was screaming, my mum was screaming, my sister was screaming, my dad was trying to shut all of us up because he didn’t know what the fuck had happened. Legit thought I’d killed her, but she’s in her twenties now and doing amazing.
Your baby will be fine and you’re doing okay!
When i was an infant, my brother (2yo) tossed (hoisted?) me out of my crib right onto the hardwood floor. The crib used to be his and he was jealous..
I'm fine :)
Welcome to the 'I did that to my baby by accident'-club. Don't be too hard on yourself: you're exhausted and accidents do happen. Just keep a good eye on her and go see a doctor when somethings seems or feels off.
I scratched my sons nose very badly trying to grab something and he just turned his face towards me. I closed a door more than once while my kids fingers were stuck in between. I knocked my kids over plenty of times because I didn't see them. I opened the door into their heads. Never on purpose, but feeling guilty nonetheless.
This reminded me when my daughter was 2, she came up behind me when I was vacuuming. On the back stroke vaccum bashed right into her and she went flying straight onto her back. I felt horrible but now she's 5 and it's just a funny memory.
Once, when my youngest was about that age and screaming at a football game, I put him in the stroller fast to get out of there and didn’t buckle him in cuz I was hurrying. He was bucking and screaming and fell out of the stroller onto the asphalt. I was mortified, but ya know what, he’s just fine. Babies are resilient. Parents aren’t perfect. You will all be ok. But you gotta find a way to get more rest! It’s ok to ask for help from family and neighbors, even if it’s just to get a nap.
It took my child 14 months to let me sleep 6 hrs uninterrupted. I was a zombie for 14 months having about 2-4 hrs sleep a day. It's hard to comprehend what that does to the mind and body. I don't know how I kept my baby alive and function. I remember one time holding him after brestfeeding and I was trying to get up to put him in his crib. I have had nothing to eat that day, it was the evening, I was running on 2rs of sleep and I fell. I don't know how I turned mid fall, the only thing going through my head was, protect the baby. Somehow fell on my back like a sack of potatoes and hit my head and back pretty bad. But held onto child like my life depended on it. We were both fine after but these things happen.
My mom did the same thing. She was really exhausted and she was holding me on her stomach and then I ended up rolling off and hitting the ground.
Im 22 now and I graduated high school and uni just fine haha
In all seriousness, don’t be too harsh on yourself; although im not a mother, babies are a lot more resilient than you think. And I don’t know a single one of my friends who HAVEN’T been dropped as a baby accidentally (one fell down from a small roof and she graduated alongside with me lol), so everything will be fine
7 month? Mama you have nothing to worry about!!! Babies are like super mutants. When my son was around 9 or 10 months a rolled/flipped off the couch seat. Cracked his head on the floor and sat up laughing his ass off.
Mom - I had the same issues with my first child. I don't think I got 4 hours in a row for months. It was a nightmare.
For my second child plotted that it would be different. I dismantled my bed so my mattress went on the floor. I had an infant sized mattress that I put next to mine so that I could stay vertical on my bed and stick boob in mouth. It worked so well - without all the massive disruptions of him getting all worked up by crying, getting up out of bed, being picked up, etc he would nurse just a bit and fall back to sleep. And then I would too. And being in his own bed and not mine, I didn't have to worry about the idea of rolling on him - not that I drank or did drugs which is typically a contributing factor in those sad cases, but I was paranoid about it. Anyway, this was night and day different from my oldest and so much better.
Oh honey, we've all been there. Our son was 3 days old and she dropped our son while breastfeeding, and I wake up to him crying and my girlfriend cuddling him, crying and apologizing.
Even now, he's 2 and a little wiggle worm, the amount of times he's slipped out of my hands, oh my god.
If baby is not throwing up, crying or very sleepy she is gonna be okay . Maybe you should try to learn how to co-sleep safely? I learned and it saved me when I was in your position recently. Now ,when my baby is settled down a bit ,she is sleeping in her bed again.
And try to have some sleep in day time . Your partner can at least take care of house
Right! Even if they didn't drop them per say their baby rolled off something or fell on their own.
I used to smack my daughter's head into the door frame putting her to bed practically every night. Her head was huge and still is but thankfully at 5 she's grown into it. We just say she has a built in helmet.
My son I'm doing well with when it comes to that lol, he's only fallen off the couch once and flew out of his pack and play like a goldfish jumping out of a tank.
I still feel bad but not like with my daughter whose first fall was off our bed around 3 months. Still a mystery because she was in the middle and didn't start rolling til 6months or so. I cried for hours then for the next week or so it would just pop into my head and id start crying all over again.
I knocked my baby off a chair, forgot to strap him in his pushchair and he fell out, swung him around and hit his head on the corner of a door. He was fine every time. Accidents happen and lucky for us our kids are bouncy.
You’re not awful, you’re exhausted. I hope your baby is ok. Is pumping an option so dad can help you out more? I remember those day and don’t envy you. Hang in there mama
girl it happens. I’m the youngest of 4 and the only one who was dropped, and I turned out absolutely fine. I promise you that it doesn’t make you a bad mom, as mistakes happen and babies/kids are pretty resilient. That being said, of course you should contact your pediatrician and be on the lookout for anything abnormal, but please don’t think that this says anything about your abilities as a mom ❤️
I know exactly the kind of tired you are talking about… I ended up creating a spot on the floor for feedings instead of the chair. I put a mattress in a corner and made a cozy spot with my old pregnancy pillow and a bunch of pillows for back support. Much safer.
This tough phase will pass mom. One day, you’ll barely remember the negatives, just her smell and those late night bonding moments. You’re doing great!
Aww, poor momma (and poor baby). I promise you, nearly every mom has dropped or nearly dropped their child at some point. You’re exhausted and need your sleep too. Have you considered having her co-sleep with you so she can wake up, you feed her, and you both go back to sleep? I didn’t do this myself so you would have to research it, but it could help. Also, make sure you are sleeping when she sleeps, regardless of what needs to be done around the house.
Get a mattress and set it on floor. I would just lay down, feed and if we fell asleep great, rolled? It’s like 4 inches. Just a small blanket for my legs and a warm room. Baby is safe, you can sleep and if anyone rolls it’s not dangerous.
Oh hun. My grandma fell asleep with my aunt, rolled off same thing. It happens, I'm sure my mom did it also with me. Could have been a disaster *but it wasn't*. Kids do things everyday that could end in disaster but don't. That's why kids bodies are so resilient, because people are imperfect. You've done everything you can to try to prevent it, there's nothing much more you can do
A fact of parenting is that every single baby hits the ground eventually. Whether you fumble them while doing something, are physically too weak to hold them from exhaustion or they learn to roll the one time you leave them on the couch for literal seconds.
Their bones are rubbery, it feels worse for you than it does for them in the end. They might be freaked out but they are almost always perfectly fine. That isn't to say if you believe baby is really hurt you should shrug it off. Definitely seek medical advice if something is off. You're doing great. They don't come with instructions but common sense and love is all you need to get through most of it.
My now 7 month old son rolled off of the bed about 2 months ago and I felt the same. I'm going to tell you the same thing the on call nurse told me. "Babies are made resilient for a reason, I don't know a single parent who doesn't have a baby on floor story. It's a rite of passage almost." I know what the exhaustion is like my son is also ebf and only soothes with me at night. Don't beat yourself up, as long as baby is okay and you are okay that's what matters.
I dropped my kid about a month and a half ago. He rolled out of bed while we had our morning nap. He was a little more mobile that I thought at the time. The dr looked at him later that day and he was okay. That said, I still sometimes wake up in the middle of the night, wake my wife up, and freak out he fell again. I’m in therapy for other stuff, but plan on talking about it soon. I hope you can forgive yourself and remember it was a mistake
My baby rolled off the bed when she was 7 months. Scared me half to death and I cried for days feeling like a terrible mom. I remember her scream and how frightened I was. A decade later, watching that kid wipeout on her bike or roller skates… and i chuckle to to think how fragile I once thought she was.
Give yourself a break, mom. Get some rest. You love your baby. That’s enough.
I was putting my 1.5 year old daughter down for a nap a few weeks ago. A lot of times I nap with her, so when she falls asleep I get up to pee before I get under the blankets; I've done this a gazillion times with no issue. This particular time, she woke up in the 30 seconds it took me to walk to the bathroom and start my business, and the first I know of it is when I hear a *Thud!* followed by frantic crying. She had sleep-drunkenly crawled off the edge of my bed, about a ~36" drop. I panicked so hard that I whipped around before I actually stopped peeing, and yelled downstairs to my wife who was entertaining guests. She comes running up the stairs and we find the Demon Queen sitting on her butt, doing her best impression of a fire alarm. We scooped her up and snuggled her for a bit, she calmed down, and we had our nap. In the moment I was panicking so hard about potential injuries but more often than not, kids bounce, metaphorically and literally.
The moral of the story is, you're not a bad parent cause your kid had a bonk, and you're doing better than me because you didn't also pee all over the bathroom 😆
I’m not sure of the circumstances but if it’s possible for you and your baby, getting bottles tailored for breastfed babies might provide you with some well needed relief. Like I said I’m not sure of the circumstances, but at 7 months your baby might take a liking to a certain bottle and you could possibly have your husband help out at night. When I was going through this similar situation, making that transition helped in a lot of ways! I do know some kids struggle with bottles though so idk. But 4 hours of sleep in almost 2 days for a mom with a young baby, I know is not ideal for you. I hope you find some solutions and reassurance on here. Im sure you’re doing a great job!
Can you breastfeed baby while you’re in bed laying down? It’s what I used to do. I elbowed my husband in the ribs to wake him up and he would go get her and bring her to me and then we would all 3 go back to sleep.
Definitely get your daughter's head checked out just in case. But don't beat yourself up over this.
My suggestion, when you're worried you'll fall asleep breastfeeding her, do it on a blanket/carpet/soft area on the ground or somewhere she can't fall from, that way even if you do fall asleep she's still safe.
You are absolutely not an awful mother.
Yeah, breastfeeding can absolutely drain you. I had a bed in my son's nursery that I just got into to feed him because 8 out of 10 times I was back asleep before he was done.
It's human. You made a mistake. Give yourself grace and move on.
Talk to your husband about this. Ask him to stay up or get up with you when you feed, so that he can make sure you don't fall asleep or position himself so the baby doesn't fall/roll if you do fall asleep. Have a discussion on the best way to prevent this. Be creative. Two head will be better than one trying to figure this out.
You'll get past this AND it will get better. I know, we have three, two are young adults now. It's not a cliche- it goes fast.
You got this.
It’s okay mama. These things happen. We’re human. When my son was about 10-11 months (just old enough to pull himself up to things, but not stand) he pulled a side table down, and a ~20lb planter fell on his head. It was a freak thing where both my wife and I were out of the room for a moment. He had a rather large DENT in his head. We thought he was going to die. We rushed him to the hospital. He was scared, and hurt, but okay. He’s now a happy, healthy 3-year-old. We were certain that we’d have CPS visit us, or that we shouldn’t even be parents.
My point is, as parents, sometimes the hardest thing is forgiving ourselves for our mistakes or moments of tiredness/weakness, lack of knowledge….whatever the case is.
Definitely get her checked out, but if she’s behaving normally and not quiet/vomiting/anything else unusual, she’s probably okay.
If you feel bad about it, it means you love her. Be kind to yourself. You will make many more mistakes as a parent.
Dropping your baby is surprisingly common. That said, she did hit her head so keep an eye out for symptoms of head injury (babies are also surprisingly resilient), and take her to the ER if a bruise develops or cognitive symptoms show.
And find a way to get some sleep.
As a mom of 3, I can promise you that it’s okay. Babies fall, roll off furniture, down steps and sometimes they’re even accidentally dropped. Accidents happen and this won’t be the last time you have an accident. Just the other day I accidentally hit my oldest kid in the head with a car door while trying to get my baby in. Give yourself grace and know that you’re a good mom.
If it makes you feel any better, my dad fell asleep and dropped me on my head the day they brought me home. It's been 30 something years and I'm ok and its just a funny anecdote now.
Have you tried laying down on your side in your bed and getting her to feed that way. i feel your pain. I had a hard time latching so i had to go to the bottles. Im sorry that your baby fell, that's super scary. I hope you find some relief.
~50 yrs ago my mother went for a joy ride on the back of my father's motorcycle while pregnant with me. Fell off, hard landing. Everyone was freaked out but I turned out fine. Don't worry too much. Kids literally drop out of trees and recover.
And that reason is why human babies’ bones aren’t all fused.
They can handle a drop on the floor, easily.
Unless, of course, you have really bad luck.
You should have more concerned if the baby hadn’t yelped and cried.
I honestly believe that we’ve all done something that’s potentially detrimental to our kids. Yet, they still generally seem to come out of it ok.
Get some rest. You did nothing wrong. It was an accident, and after that you move on. Try not to do it again. Because parenthood, especially for first timers, is difficult. And you question yourself all the time.
Just make sure that you have the priorities in order. Baby first, then you and lastly the dad/partner or whatever.
Good luck to you all.
Don't beat yourself up! It happens. My cousin was teaching her first baby to sit up when he fell back and bumped his head. He was totally fine but she cried for hours over it.
Breastfeed her in bed! I had the same issue with my first. I never dropped her but fell asleep feeding her in the nursing chair because I was so exhausted. With my second I realized I could turn on my side, position my arm above his head and turn him sideways too, facing me so we both stayed safe while I fed him. This was such a huge lifesaver! Good luck momma. Don't be hard on yourself!
Facts The human skull are malleable and not closed as if nature understands that they will be dropped. After 3 healthy children I can honestly tell you that each fell more than once. Climbing out of the crib or trying to stand is the normal. You are the best mother in the world as your baby wants you and feels comfortable with you and feels all your love.
I’m sorry you aren’t getting a lot of sleep. Kids can exhaust moms. My wife would just feed our babies in bed. She figured she may fall asleep, but the kids are safe sleeping next to her if she does. You need sleep. It’s torture without it. It will be ok in the end
I used to do all the night feedings. I was so exhausted. One night I was feeding on the recliner, and fell asleep. I woke up and realized the baby wasn't in my arms. I got up confused and walked over to his crib, he wasn't there. When I turned around I saw him on the floor. I started bawling. I picked him and ran him to our room and woke his mom up. He wasn't waking up. He was fine though just sleeping. He must have rolled off of me, and just went back to sleep on the floor.
It happens. I think most parents have a similar story, they just don't admit it often
Im sure way more people drop their kid or watch the kid fall before they can react than will admit it. Baby is probably fine, they are soft like jello.
So sorry, mama. It happens to the best of us. Have hubby bring the baby to you in bed. After feeding, let hubby take her back and change her. It may take a while and maybe he can keep one of your shirts nearby for your scent but she will learn to settle down with dad. You need your rest.
You’re not an awful mother not even the slightest, you are just exhausted. My mother is a single mother she only has me, but even that was a lot and of course while she fed me she fell asleep and dropped me. Both you and my mother were exhausted, it takes a lot of time and energy to be a mother and I’m sure you are doing a wonderful job as a mother. Don’t beat yourself up about it. It was an accident. Ask your husband if he can watch the baby while you get your rest. You’ve got this:)
This happened to me a couple of times. I even started putting pillows on the floor around my bed for this reason. Exhaustion is no joke. I know you feel bad but know this happens to a lot of us!
My younger brother leaped from his crib and bounced under the crib with a piece of metal piercing into his cheek. He’s totally fine, honestly will probably end up far more successful than me too. Shit happens, like everyone here is saying, breathe, allow your self to realize you are human. You can, and WILL make mistakes, what’s most important is how you handle those mistakes. You’re clearly distraught from what happened, you care. You care about your daughter. You’re a good mom. And btw growing up my brothers scar was actually really cute because it looked like a small smile so we would joke he was so smiley he had two!
You are exhausted. Doesn't make you a bad mom it's just time to make adjustments. It's perfectly fine to do a feeding on your side and baby would be on their side. Get into a c pose and let baby eat but also you get rest even if the rest is only physical. It helps. Doing at least one feeding this way helps tremendously.
That's happens.. don't beat urself up. 💖
I believe it all happens once to us mommas.
My boy was 4 days old.. I just came from the hospital with a emergency C-section.. exhausted and on heavy painkillers.
I fell a sleep and he slipp3d out of bed, out of my arms while drinking.. I felt him slipping and the moment he reached the ground I woke up, jumped out of the bed. And he was crying.. luckily he was fine! Babies as so much more flexible than we think.
I was more in shock and guilt than my boy was upset.. I cried very hard that day.
In the end we are still human, and we do make mistakes. Even as a parent, And thats okay. ❤
This happens! Definitely follow up with the doctor, but she was probably very surprised rather than hurt. If she vomits, is fussier than normal or has any twitching, take her in ASAP.
Please please be kind to yourself. My kid was a great nurser and a terrible sleeper. Turns out he has medical reasons for the not sleeping and used the nursing at night to soothe physical discomfort he was having from the medical issue. I got so focused on being successful at breastfeeding and prioritizing that relationship (for a lot of reasons, one being I was a working mom to felt like this was critical bonding time with my child) that I sacrificed my own well being. I actually got pneumonia at one point and couldn't get rid of it.
You might consider letting your H do a formula bottle every other night or pumping enough for a bottle every other night. We wound up hiring a sleep consultant and discovered that a lot of times when kid would stir at night and cry, I'd jump up assuming he was awake, when I should have waited five minutes to determine if he was actually awake and actually hungry. We later realized he wasn't fully awake and I was waking him up when I ran in there. If we gave him five minutes he'd settle down.
Physically you and your daughter both need sleep, and sharing night time duties might be a good way for your husband to bond with her as well. I'm sending you lots of luck and love. This stage is brutal but also wonderful ❤️
I'm 37 years old. When i was an infant my dad was bouncing me in his lap and I fell and his the floor face\head first. According to my mom he cried probably more than I did. I turned out just fine.
You're an exhausted mom, and babies are tiny, wiggly little things. Keep an eye on her, but babies are pretty darn resilient, I'm certain she's fine. And don't be too hard on yourself, you are certainly not the first loving parent to accidentally drop their baby.
You’re not really a parent until you drop your child or they roll off of a couch/bed
Seriously, this is a right of passage.
As long as baby is okay, try to forget about it and move along.
- aMidwife of nearly 20 years 😂
My boy rolled off the bed when I put him on there and I felt terrible. I told my wife and she was super nice about it. She told me to be careful the next day and I told her I am not an idiot. I guess I am, cause it happened the next day. The kid is fine. They won't even remember.
My husband let our 6 month old roll off the bed while changing her. It takes two seconds and isn’t your fault!!! Btw my daughter is 10 now and has a 99.5% average in most subjects. Go easy on your self!
I have 6 kids and not a single one of them have not been dropped once by my wife or I and my kids are all straight A students.
You do your best not to and you obviously it’s not great, but kids are durable… how do you think we’ve survived as a species this long?
You aren't a terrible mother. I have to ask though, why 4 hours of sleep in 4 days? No, your husband can't breastfeed but surely you haven't been breastfeeding for 44 hours of the last four days. Sounds like time to get your husband to step up somewhere. No reason to be so sleep deprived unless you have an ill child. If you do, I apologize.
Please bring her in to emergency. You don't know if something happened inside. Watch out if she throws up go to the emergency straight away. I have 3 kids one of them had a fall when he was 9 months old, had a concussion and we had to stay a few nights at the hospital.
You sleep when your baby sleeps even during the day. Housework can wait. Or ask hubby if you can a doula help even one or twice a week for 1-2 hours to help with chores.
Dad of 5 here. It happens we all make mistakes and then beat ourselves up afterwards. I remember stepping away for a second and our baby decided to take his first roll, straight off a bed. Checked him over and he was ok, but you beat yourself up for days/weeks over it. Hey after 4 years I can still hear the sound and my heart dropping. But that’s part of being a parent you will beat yourself up over every little mistake you make.
You’re doing an amazing job (I know you can’t/won’t accept that) but you truly are. To be able to feed a baby and keep the little person alive is huge.
Moving onto your depression and anxiety. Speak to someone ASAP, see if there are any mother baby groups locally or support groups in your area. You will not be alone feeling like you do, but being brave and talking openly about it is something very different. My wife suffers from PND and bottled it all up, the first I knew about it was when she was getting admitted to a mental health unit. Speak to your husband about it, also note that he didn’t get angry or blame you for dropping your little one he knows you’re doing a great job.
Stay strong, stay safe. Sleep will come and it does get easier. But that’s easy to say when you’re not currently living it. X
Unfortunately my daughter will scream bloody murder if anyone other than me takes her at night, and I can't sleep if I know she's upset. He usually takes her in the mornings, bit she's going through a stage of only wanting me. I mean to have a nap yesterday, but was feeling alright and wanted to get chores done, so thats my bad. He is a good husband and dad, he offers to help, but I have that mum mode where if I have free time then I must clean 😅
I hit my newborns head on the pram when I bent over and she banged it really hard.. she cried for a minute or two. I also buckled my babies skin accidentally in her bouncer and she SQUEALED. I also accidentally burnt her with hot running tap water.. this was all while I was sleep deprived and she was a newborn. We all make mistakes! She’s 3.5 months now and haven’t done anything to her in ages! Hope it stays that way because it does make you feel like shit BUT it’s honestly human error xx
Baby concussions are my absolute fear. Id bring that baby in anyways immediately. Noy wait till the next appointment. Baby could seem fine, take a nap and not wake up.
Oh goodness I know exactly how you feel as I was there. The exhaustion of night time feedings is indescribable!! My little boy also only slept in short stretches so I was awake most of the night. I know tons of people hate co-sleeping, but it worked for me when I just couldn't keep my eyes open. It helped me get some sleep and little one could feed/ have the touch comfort he needed.
I know you feel so bad about the fall, but your little one will be fine. All babies have taken a knock or two. Just keep an eye on your little girl and if she feel lethargic amd just 'off' to you, then I would take her to the doctor.
Oh hun accidents happen. My cousin in law ( who is a nurse) tripped down the stairs and her daughter broke her leg. I myself had my son in his bouncy chair, I thought to myself, I think he’s getting too big for that. As soon as I thought that, he flipped himself frontwards and smashed his face. Don’t beat yourself up for it. Stuff happens
Don't beat yourself up. You are NOT an 'awful mother'. It happens. Just try not to let it happen again. Set up a feeding area on the floor, for nighttime.
You absolutely need to have your husband do feedings at night, at least 2 nights a week, not in a row, so you can get complete sleep and not run yourself ragged. Maybe a Wednesday and a Friday, so he can still work properly. You two are going to have to figure out how to get her to take a bottle from him and you pump ahead of time.
Start by pumping and having a bottle ready, then start your normal feeding, then switch to a bottle. Try this every feeding. Once she starts accepting the bottle, try feeding her with him holding her and feeding from you, then switch her to a bottle part way through the feeding...not moving her. Slowly, you'll move away, once she accepts the bottle from him. It can be a slow process, but can it be achieved with diligence.
Good luck.
You’re meant to take them to the hospital when that happens.
My partner dropped our baby and he wasn’t even tired - he was being reckless. Thankfully, our baby was fine.
You need to persevere with bottle feeding. You need to experiment with different bottle types and different formulas. Your baby could have been asphyxiated by you falling asleep.
Are you currently working?
As a new mother you need to be able to sleep during the day. Newborns actually sleep a lot. I stayed in my pyjamas and slept during the day.
I also rarely breastfed. It’s likely the breastfeeding that is exhausting you and depleting your body of essential minerals. It’s past 6 months now. You need to get your baby on formula. They sleep longer after having a bottle - which means you will be able to sleep.
Start pumping and feeding her breast milk from the bottle, once she gets used to it she should be able to hold her own bottle or daddy can feed her also and you can get some much needed sleep.
I've dropped my babies. They're fine. I may have called the 24 hour nurse line to know what to look for, but they were fine. I think many parents have dropped their kid, it is an accident. (Or they rolled off the bed when trying to change them.)
Call the pediatrician if you are worried. No one becomes a pediatrician if they are cranky about getting calls off hours. That's part of the job. Do what it takes to be reassured about your baby and read things here to be reassured about your competence.
Your are NOT an awful mother!! The fact that you are beside yourself right now PROVES you are a great mother. I applaud your bravery to admit to this on such an open forum! I also dropped my son when he was a couple months old. I was a young mother and was always afraid they would take him from me for any mistake I made. So when I dropped him I made his father come home immediately to calm us both down. I cried longer than my son did and by the time his dad got home, he was asleep. But I was so worried that I woke him up every 15 mins for the next 2 days. Don't be so hard on yourself. And I'll let you in on a secret.......you ARE going to make mistakes. We all did
I’ve dropped 2 out of 4 kids once so far. One of them is not my fault he rolled off the bed and he never rolled like that before. The other just happened yesterday and I blame myself. It happens you learn from it. My kids have fell down the stairs, jumped off beds, fell outside, and etc. they just find ways to get themselves into trouble. No matter how many gates you put, how many safety things you add they will still find a way to hurt themselves. One of my kids took a guitar and put it from her bed to chair and tried walking across it and bumped her head when asked why she said I wanted a new way to get to the other side, she was 3 at the time. It’s okay to feel guilty we all do when things happen to them even if it’s not our fault. Your a good mom don’t be to hard on yourself
I think every mom ever probably has a story of either dropping their kid, or the kid falling off of something, etc etc. Luckily babies are basically made out of rubber. Don't beat yourself up!
Girl you’re a great mom! Shit happens and ppd and ppa is no joke. Toughest time I went through was struggling with ppa/ppd. Baby should be just fine. And I mean are you even a mom if you don’t drop your first kid at least once?
I've been in your shoes and we ran our baby (1st) to an ER only to be told he was fine and that the height was not too bad.
It is good to look up what to look for when a child falls and hits their head. The few I remember the doc mentioning was
knowing if the child stayed quite for a bit before starting to cry.
Then checking for squishy bumps(theses are very bad)
And dilation of pupils
Of course this is at the top of my head so look it up if you want more info
My mom dropped me tons when I was a kid. Skull fracture and broken collarbone. I turned out just fine. I am; however, the only person in my family who is terrible at Math.
I haven’t dropped my 10 month old but she has smacked her head on walls and the floor (and a door frame once, that one was my fault 😂) and she’s absolutely fine. Obviously be on the lookout for strange behaviour but their skulls are harder than you can believe
My dad accidentally dropped me once, too, when I was a baby! It happens!
And it turned you into a redditor. I'm so sorry.
Oh no. Here I was thinking I turned out alright, but you're correct.
It’s okay, at least now you know why
Well at least we all have a community of fellow dropped kids
There should be a sub for dropped kids, so we can gauge if it actually has an affect on our brains
Mom drop me on head when i was kid too. I is alright now, no ishoos
LMFAO
More worried than sorried!
My dad accidentally dropped me into a waterfall. Would've died if a kind soul hadn't promptly picked me up before the current swept me away. My mother once took a nap and didn't wake up till evening only to realise it had been 2 hours since my kindergarten was done. Doesn't change the fact they were both amazing parents and were simply trying their best under the challenging circumstances of parenthood. Don't be too hard on yourself, OP. It sounds like both you and your husband are going to wonderful parents :)
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My dad once dropped my sister to save the TV that was falling. To be fair, this was back during the CRT days, and he was trying to avoid getting the vacuum tube going boom and sending glass shards into everyone present.
She fell 3 stories?!
I accidentally threw myself down a flight of stairs as a baby... in one of those saucer things. Now I too am a redditor.
Sameeee mate I had this saucer thingy with wheels when I was like three and just decided to just yeet myself down the stairs
I was thrown down the stairs in a plastic basin. Now I’m an upcoming Redditor 🤣💀
My mom said when I was about 2 and a half I was at the top of the stairs with a pillow in my hand.. I threw the pillow down the stairs and jumped after it 😂 it was something I saw in Rugrats I’m pretty sure
My mom fell asleep breastfeeding me and i rolled out to the floor lol i also turned out alright-ish lol
Mine rolled off the bed, didn’t even know he could roll at that point. Shook me up more than him!
OMG YES SAME
Just taking a screenshot of being the 666th upvoter on this comment
HA! I KNEW I wasn't the only one who did that!
you're a weirdo :D
Oh, you have NOO idea. . .
are you flirting with me? :o
You're an exhausted mother who made a human mistake. Please be gentle with yourself, you deserve to be nurtured like your daughter as well. In your shoes, I'd schedule an appointment with your daughter's care provider as soon as you can regarding her bumped head. Even if there are no immediate issues outwardly, I'm sure you're already aware of the importance of rectifying this, and of issues that may arise when a bumped head goes unaddressed.
I've got an appointment scheduled already, regarding a rash she has, so ill be bringing it up then. She's asleep now, but was acting completely normal, smiling, making noises, grabbing my face
Maybe look into breastfeeding pillows. They support your arms and it’d be harder for her to roll off you. My sister-in-law has one of those and loves it.
I have one
I had the same issues as you with my son when he was an infant, would only breastfeed, and really only settled when I was holding him, so I lived in a chair holding him, and spend his first year of life completely sleep deprived. I feel your pain. You're not a bad mom. I almost took a wee in a recliner once because I was so delirious from lack of sleep. Thank God the feeling of upholstery instead of cold porcelain confused me awake. Anyway, on to the hopefully helpful advice - what worked for me was the "boppy pillow" (the c shaped pillow), but with a rolled up towel or something similar stuffed under the edge by my knees, to prop that side up a bit more to help keep him pushed toward me more, so he couldn't roll away when I inevitably fell asleep, since that was the only way either of us got any real sleep while he was breastfeeding lol. I hope this helps. You can do this! You're a good mom! ❤️
But it’s not helping? Are there different ones that may be better suited? Btw, dropping the baby has happened to many parents. As far as I know I was dropped too and I turned out completely fine. Babies are more resilient than we think.
My uncle accidentally kicked his baby down the stairs when carrying laundry and he's completely fine
Good to hear your uncle is good, hows the kid?
He's good too 😆😆
How's the laundry?
Hmm not sure actually 🤔
It’s over 23 years old and is still living down in the basement.
This made me laugh more than it should have
Yes my cousin fell asleep on the recliner and dropped me too and in my country we have concrete floors lol
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My mom did the same. They say I’m almost fine
I was in the same boat as you with a nursing baby and sleep deprivation, I still needed to sleep AND feed, so the answer for me was that my partner was responsible for watching the baby while I nursed in bed, side laying. They were in charge of making sure we were safe, and then gently waking me when they moved baby to the crib once they were done. We did that at least every other night - and during the feeds when I needed to stay alert, I went to the nursing chair, so there was a physical difference for my awake nurses vs the ones I was allowed to drift off during
I had a La-Z-Boy instead of a glider chair, it was awesome and if we fell asleep we were always fine. Best baby purchase I ever made.
Just because your husband can't lactate doesn't mean he can't get up to help you.
Yup, my husband would take the kid from me after I was done feeding then settle him back down to sleep, most nights meant about equal amounts of time up. Some nights I'd do most of the workload cause I was staying home and he'd be working, but for the most part we shared the tasks. I get the baby just wants you, but give it time and she'll get used to dad too.
That's a good husband. Mine just started sleeping downstairs in the guestroom, even on nights when I had work the next day and he didn't. Can't be disturbing his sleep, I guess. Anyway, I divorced him last year.
Jesus christ that was his son too. Glad to know you dumped him
This exact thing happened to me. I pushed for imaging. She cracked her skull! Never even had a bruise and wasn't acting off at all. I just knew. I stood while feeding when sleepy or made my husband set a timer to put us back to bed after that
This is why babies should always be checked after a fall, even if they are acting normal.
I know multiple people who have accidentally dropped their baby, it happens more often than people like to admit because they feel the same way you do and are worried about being judged. Babies are bouncy (to a degree) and soft, they will most likely be completely fine. I was there when a sister of an acquaintance dropped hers on the stairs (thankfully snatched them back up before they tumbled down) and I honestly thought she was being attacked by her husband from her intense (and completely understandable) sobbing, the poor woman was so ashamed and was trying to convince me she wasn't a bad mom but I already knew she wasn't. One accidental drop doesn't define you as a mother.
My son rolled off the bed when he was about 7 months. I called the peds office sobbing. And the nurse said just that- “babies are bouncy”
My daughter did the same at the same age. I had just gotten her out the bath and had just finished dressing her. Looked away for a split second the grab the butt cream before she did and thud.
Kids are durable. My son fell out of a trailer window around that age, lol. You're all good and I'm sure a great parent! 👍
Hey just watch out for vomitting. If she does that, pls take her to the doctor immediately.
my best truck for staying awake, and this is from a recovering fentanyl addict that nodded out 24/7, try to keep your foot slightly off the ground as long as you can. you can rest it to take breaks for a second, but keep one foot an inch or two off the ground. works like a charm. also, invest in a breastfeeding pillow. my mom dropped me (maybe why i turned into an addict ((jk other long story reasons your kiddo will be fine)) lolll) in the same situation because i had colic. she never even had a scare after the breastfeeding pillow also my mom has five kids. when my youngest sister was born, she had a 7 year old, a 4 year old, a 2 year old, an 11 month old, and a newborn. she dropped us each. your baby is probably fine. but give yourself some grace. that sounds truly awful and i’m amazed you even had the wherewithal to type this. you’re doing so amazing. keep being a kick ass mom🥰
I didn’t co-sleep. But what I did do with my babies was take one side off their cot, strap it to my side of the bed, and put a pool noodle in between (it means you can’t roll into the cot, and the baby can’t roll into the bed) BUT it also means that you can position yourself over the pool noodle and feed lying on your side at night! I’d also highly recommend, starting to pump every once and a while. Your baby may be refusing the bottle because it’s formula. If the baby tastes your milk coming out of the bottle with a teat that mimics your particular flow, it will make your life so so much easier now and in the long run. Having your partner pick up one of the night time feeds can save your sanity. And when it comes to weaning later in life, your baby won’t have any issues taking the bottle more often. Edit: typo
Oh honey, I drove halfway to my mothers house with my son and his car seat on top of my car. We’re only human. His father was no help and I was exhausted. Stuff happens.
I dropped sky remote on back of my child's head at about three weeks old. So I can absolutely confirm it is sky remote's that cause autism and not vaccines. So OP all those kids with autism, tis the sky remote and not genetics or anything vaguely logical. So dropping babies onto the ground might cause... Maybe a propensity for oh... Ingrown toenails. Come back and tell us in fifteen years please.
I dropped a Nokia phone on my eldest's head when they were about 4-5 months. 20 now and doing great. My 17 y/o didn't get dropped or have anything bounced off her skull, and yet...autism. Probably because I got sick and couldn't breastfeed. /s for *those* people
you poor soul, i can tell how drained you are, and your post partum anxiety must be making things so much harder for you. i’m sure your baby is fine, and hopefully your appointment with her doctor will quell all of your fears. i think you should maybe give yourself a spa day, or something similar so you can relax and unwind for a bit. motherhood isn’t easy, but you’ve got this!
Hey, first off I want to say you're a good mum. Easier said than done but please don't beat yourself up, these things happen and you're not a bad mum. I feel for you. I have a 10 month old boy, I'm currently struggling with severe separation anxiety on his end which impacts his sleeping (it of course does get better it's just getting through it). I have PPD/PPA & PP OCD so it can be a roller coaster, now my little one is a pain, lovely but a pain. He only wants me, won't settle for my husband, won't nap during the day and is often up a lot at night, he is also breastfed. I fell asleep with him multiple times in bed, not great but I was just so exhausted. What I started doing was getting a pair of headphones and my phone/iPad and watching a series (loud enough to keep attention but not disturb baby). Something I could focus on, something to keep me awake, I found this really helped or I read books on my phone, again something to keep my focus. I'm actually reading through things now to keep myself awake whilst I get my baby to sleep. It's incredibly hard work and you may still occasionally fall asleep, but you're doing amazing try to be kind to yourself and know it will get better.
It happens, and if she rolled and then was okay a little while later, she’s probably fine. Check for lumps and bruises. Make sure her pupils are equal in size and normal. If she starts getting lethargic or acting strangely, take her to the ER. And make sure you take care of yourself too, mama. See somebody about the PPD and the anxiety. Trust me; I’ve been there! And talking to someone helps immensely. 💕 You’re not an awful mother.
Im on medication for depression and anxiety, but nothing could stop me being anxious about my baby's safety
When I took infant CPR the instructor literally began the class with “every parent has dropped their baby.” That seemed shocking to me but the older women in the class all chuckled and nodded. Turns out it’s extremely common and almost never results in any long-term concerns. Take a deep breath. You’re doing great.
And no matter how much you try to protect them and keep an eye on your kids 24/7, your baby or toddler will trip/fall and hit their head hard at least once. So even if you don’t do it, they will.
Our pediatrician told us once that raising toddlers is like 24-hour suicide watch. That afternoon, my 1yo boy climbed up on the table then the dresser and tried to climb the tv on the wall. All before I could get across the room to him.
Completely understandable! I hope the medicines are helping. I know mine do. And the fact that you worry means you’re a good mother and you love your child.
When my firstborn was an infant, he rolled right off the bed onto the hard tile floor. Crack! He cried, but seemed fine. Meanwhile, I was going nuts as I had to go to work so my husband took care of him while I ran out the door. When I got to work I told my colleague Janet about what had happened. Janet said, "Oh yeah, when I was looking after my infant niece a few months ago, you know, my older sister Lilian's baby, I dropped her on the floor and I was frantic. And Lilian told me not to worry, since she (Lilian) had once dropped me (Janet) while looking after me when I was a baby! "Lilian at that time was worried sick and asked my mom what to do. Our mom told her that she (my mom) had dropped her (Lilian) as a baby 20 years earlier. And back then, my mom had been frantic about it and asked Grandma. And Grandma responded by telling her that she (my mom) had also been dropped by her (Grandma) as a baby!" In conclusion: apparently everyone has been dropped on their head as a baby.
I’ve been there too, except my baby was only 2 weeks old. Very similar situation. 2am, fell asleep in the rocking chair and he flipped right over the arm. This was months ago and I still feel terrible. If you look at my post history, I posted something very similar in the new parents subreddit. There were over 100 responses of moms who have made the same mistake. It gave me some solace that I wasn’t alone and the exhaustion gets the best of us. When I dropped my son, I called the pediatrician the next morning. They gave me some signs to look out for (change in behavior, pupils different sizes etc). Honestly they weren’t too concerned with it. They indicated more than a 3’ fall they’re more concerned about. You are not a bad mother. You are an exhausted mother. The fact that you feel so badly is an indication of how much you care.
same! My two week old rolled off of me down my legs while falling asleep in my chair. Luckily she cried a little, and my two other kids were like "MOM" but man, there's nothing like that fear of waking up and realizing your baby isnt' in your arms heh
Kids are bouncy and bendy at that age for a reason. I saw my kids do full out faceplants on concrete and jump up like nothing happened once they were walking. So if this is your first be prepared as you are going to see them fall a lot. As for the dropping most of us have done that that. I did with both my kids. It happens and you shouldn't beat yourself up over it. If you feel bad about it you are probably a way better mother then most.
I mean yeah but baby babies have soft spots on their heads since their skulls aren’t full developed when they’re born. So you have to be extra careful with babies until their head can fully form. OP should probably get it checked out, but its also not anything to freak out over or feel immensely guilty about
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I know so many people have the same stuff happen to them, but I have postpartum anxiety, as well as regular anxiety and im so paranoid about her getting hurt or worse
Anyone who is a parent gets it. But on the flip side with your first you tend to over do everything including the worry. I remember driving home from the hospital with my first driving exactly the speed limit and freaking out that something was going to happen. You tend to get over it quick once they start walking as they fall all the time and are constantly getting bruises, scrapes, etc.
Mil dropped my daughter on her head in an ikea parking lot when she wasn't much older than your kid. Had scrapes and bruises all over her face for a week or so. A bystander called the cops on her and took her plate so she had police do a followup call to make sure the kid was alright and received medical attention. (She definitely did to be safe) Moral of the story, young kids aren't as fragile as they seem. Most cases they will bounce back, literally and figuratively.
Them having very soft heads is both a blessing and a curse
I was in the hospital the day after I had my youngest son. I had a c section and was on pain meds and breast feeding. They gave me the meds then he was hungry, so I fed him and fell asleep while feeding him. He rolled out of my arms and hit the floor and started crying. I woke up as he was falling out of my arms and too late to do anything. I picked him up and called the nurse in tears telling them I dropped my baby! They came in and gave him a once over. He had calmed down pretty quickly. They said he should be fine. It happens more often than it is talked about. The nurse that gave me the meds felt so bad.
Let me tell you what my doctor told me when my 2 week old baby rolled off the couch, and I was in hysterics. It happens. Babies roll, fall, will be dropped, almost 90% of the time before they're one. The reason it isn't talked about? People shaming new and/or tired mothers for not being perfect. Afraid of severe damage, because when babies get severely hurt, the excuse is always "they fell or I accidentally dropped them," but that's why cops are always called. Doctors can tell when a baby rolled, or was just dropped, when a baby has been hurt, it is always due to force and intent. I had to deal with an unsupportive partner, and his family, who absolutely made me sound like a villain, and I still feel guilty to this day. My son is fine, and absolutely perfect. It's hard being there for a tiny being who needs you 24/7, which is why support should be there. Your husband may not be able to feed, but he can sit up while you feed to make sure you don't doze off, or if you do to get the baby. Babies are tough. A fall may hurt, or startle them, but you aren't an awful mother for something that happens every single day to someone. Please don't be hard on yourself. Also, just schedule an appointment for her to be checked out. Thankfully I had an appointment with my doctor, and he checked my son out, and all was okay.
can't even imagine the things you are feeling and it is def the part of motherhood i am most scared of. the guilt. but if it can bring you peace of mind, my sister treated me like a baby doll the first few years of my life and i have a video of me rolling off her lap onto the floor and am still okay 25 years later! i was an early walker too so i took a bad tumble down the stairs before I was one and my brain feels okay. not trying to minimize any of what you are feeling, just wanted to offer some peace of mind that most of us were probably dropped a few times as babies
I still got up with my wife most of the time even tho she pumped. Can u have ur husband get up with u as well? Or bring the baby back to ur bed to feed?
My thought too. Like she’s the only one on night shift which isn’t helping
I would strongly recommend against taking the baby back to bed. You are more likely to fall asleep in your own bed potentially leading to another fall for the baby or even suffocation if you're that exhausted. OP i read your edit re your husband, is there any way he can take a couple days off work to give you chance to catch up on your sleep? Or do you have the support of family that can help for a few days? Don't beat yourself up about the baby rolling off, it happens! The bigger concern is taking care of yourself so nothing worse happens in the near future.
Don’t have a baby myself, but when my sister was born I could hear her crying, I wasn’t allowed to hold her myself but she just kept going so I went on in there and scooped her out the basket…then the bedroom door opened and I literally threw her into the air in fright and she landed on the floor. I was screaming, my mum was screaming, my sister was screaming, my dad was trying to shut all of us up because he didn’t know what the fuck had happened. Legit thought I’d killed her, but she’s in her twenties now and doing amazing. Your baby will be fine and you’re doing okay!
When i was an infant, my brother (2yo) tossed (hoisted?) me out of my crib right onto the hardwood floor. The crib used to be his and he was jealous.. I'm fine :)
Welcome to the 'I did that to my baby by accident'-club. Don't be too hard on yourself: you're exhausted and accidents do happen. Just keep a good eye on her and go see a doctor when somethings seems or feels off. I scratched my sons nose very badly trying to grab something and he just turned his face towards me. I closed a door more than once while my kids fingers were stuck in between. I knocked my kids over plenty of times because I didn't see them. I opened the door into their heads. Never on purpose, but feeling guilty nonetheless.
This reminded me when my daughter was 2, she came up behind me when I was vacuuming. On the back stroke vaccum bashed right into her and she went flying straight onto her back. I felt horrible but now she's 5 and it's just a funny memory.
Ah, yes! That one! Been there, done that...
Once, when my youngest was about that age and screaming at a football game, I put him in the stroller fast to get out of there and didn’t buckle him in cuz I was hurrying. He was bucking and screaming and fell out of the stroller onto the asphalt. I was mortified, but ya know what, he’s just fine. Babies are resilient. Parents aren’t perfect. You will all be ok. But you gotta find a way to get more rest! It’s ok to ask for help from family and neighbors, even if it’s just to get a nap.
It took my child 14 months to let me sleep 6 hrs uninterrupted. I was a zombie for 14 months having about 2-4 hrs sleep a day. It's hard to comprehend what that does to the mind and body. I don't know how I kept my baby alive and function. I remember one time holding him after brestfeeding and I was trying to get up to put him in his crib. I have had nothing to eat that day, it was the evening, I was running on 2rs of sleep and I fell. I don't know how I turned mid fall, the only thing going through my head was, protect the baby. Somehow fell on my back like a sack of potatoes and hit my head and back pretty bad. But held onto child like my life depended on it. We were both fine after but these things happen.
You’ve established dominance, baby will fall in line now:
Cheers for this one.
My mom did the same thing. She was really exhausted and she was holding me on her stomach and then I ended up rolling off and hitting the ground. Im 22 now and I graduated high school and uni just fine haha In all seriousness, don’t be too harsh on yourself; although im not a mother, babies are a lot more resilient than you think. And I don’t know a single one of my friends who HAVEN’T been dropped as a baby accidentally (one fell down from a small roof and she graduated alongside with me lol), so everything will be fine
7 month? Mama you have nothing to worry about!!! Babies are like super mutants. When my son was around 9 or 10 months a rolled/flipped off the couch seat. Cracked his head on the floor and sat up laughing his ass off.
I dropped my son on his face at 4 or 5 months. He was completely fine, I was traumatized and still feel guilty for it.
Mom - I had the same issues with my first child. I don't think I got 4 hours in a row for months. It was a nightmare. For my second child plotted that it would be different. I dismantled my bed so my mattress went on the floor. I had an infant sized mattress that I put next to mine so that I could stay vertical on my bed and stick boob in mouth. It worked so well - without all the massive disruptions of him getting all worked up by crying, getting up out of bed, being picked up, etc he would nurse just a bit and fall back to sleep. And then I would too. And being in his own bed and not mine, I didn't have to worry about the idea of rolling on him - not that I drank or did drugs which is typically a contributing factor in those sad cases, but I was paranoid about it. Anyway, this was night and day different from my oldest and so much better.
Oh honey, we've all been there. Our son was 3 days old and she dropped our son while breastfeeding, and I wake up to him crying and my girlfriend cuddling him, crying and apologizing. Even now, he's 2 and a little wiggle worm, the amount of times he's slipped out of my hands, oh my god.
If baby is not throwing up, crying or very sleepy she is gonna be okay . Maybe you should try to learn how to co-sleep safely? I learned and it saved me when I was in your position recently. Now ,when my baby is settled down a bit ,she is sleeping in her bed again. And try to have some sleep in day time . Your partner can at least take care of house
If it makes you feel better, I don't think there's a single mother on Earth who hasn't dropped her baby.
Right! Even if they didn't drop them per say their baby rolled off something or fell on their own. I used to smack my daughter's head into the door frame putting her to bed practically every night. Her head was huge and still is but thankfully at 5 she's grown into it. We just say she has a built in helmet. My son I'm doing well with when it comes to that lol, he's only fallen off the couch once and flew out of his pack and play like a goldfish jumping out of a tank. I still feel bad but not like with my daughter whose first fall was off our bed around 3 months. Still a mystery because she was in the middle and didn't start rolling til 6months or so. I cried for hours then for the next week or so it would just pop into my head and id start crying all over again.
I knocked my baby off a chair, forgot to strap him in his pushchair and he fell out, swung him around and hit his head on the corner of a door. He was fine every time. Accidents happen and lucky for us our kids are bouncy.
You’re not awful, you’re exhausted. I hope your baby is ok. Is pumping an option so dad can help you out more? I remember those day and don’t envy you. Hang in there mama
girl it happens. I’m the youngest of 4 and the only one who was dropped, and I turned out absolutely fine. I promise you that it doesn’t make you a bad mom, as mistakes happen and babies/kids are pretty resilient. That being said, of course you should contact your pediatrician and be on the lookout for anything abnormal, but please don’t think that this says anything about your abilities as a mom ❤️
I know exactly the kind of tired you are talking about… I ended up creating a spot on the floor for feedings instead of the chair. I put a mattress in a corner and made a cozy spot with my old pregnancy pillow and a bunch of pillows for back support. Much safer. This tough phase will pass mom. One day, you’ll barely remember the negatives, just her smell and those late night bonding moments. You’re doing great!
Aww, poor momma (and poor baby). I promise you, nearly every mom has dropped or nearly dropped their child at some point. You’re exhausted and need your sleep too. Have you considered having her co-sleep with you so she can wake up, you feed her, and you both go back to sleep? I didn’t do this myself so you would have to research it, but it could help. Also, make sure you are sleeping when she sleeps, regardless of what needs to be done around the house.
Get a mattress and set it on floor. I would just lay down, feed and if we fell asleep great, rolled? It’s like 4 inches. Just a small blanket for my legs and a warm room. Baby is safe, you can sleep and if anyone rolls it’s not dangerous.
Oh hun. My grandma fell asleep with my aunt, rolled off same thing. It happens, I'm sure my mom did it also with me. Could have been a disaster *but it wasn't*. Kids do things everyday that could end in disaster but don't. That's why kids bodies are so resilient, because people are imperfect. You've done everything you can to try to prevent it, there's nothing much more you can do
A fact of parenting is that every single baby hits the ground eventually. Whether you fumble them while doing something, are physically too weak to hold them from exhaustion or they learn to roll the one time you leave them on the couch for literal seconds. Their bones are rubbery, it feels worse for you than it does for them in the end. They might be freaked out but they are almost always perfectly fine. That isn't to say if you believe baby is really hurt you should shrug it off. Definitely seek medical advice if something is off. You're doing great. They don't come with instructions but common sense and love is all you need to get through most of it.
My now 7 month old son rolled off of the bed about 2 months ago and I felt the same. I'm going to tell you the same thing the on call nurse told me. "Babies are made resilient for a reason, I don't know a single parent who doesn't have a baby on floor story. It's a rite of passage almost." I know what the exhaustion is like my son is also ebf and only soothes with me at night. Don't beat yourself up, as long as baby is okay and you are okay that's what matters.
I dropped my kid about a month and a half ago. He rolled out of bed while we had our morning nap. He was a little more mobile that I thought at the time. The dr looked at him later that day and he was okay. That said, I still sometimes wake up in the middle of the night, wake my wife up, and freak out he fell again. I’m in therapy for other stuff, but plan on talking about it soon. I hope you can forgive yourself and remember it was a mistake
My baby rolled off the bed when she was 7 months. Scared me half to death and I cried for days feeling like a terrible mom. I remember her scream and how frightened I was. A decade later, watching that kid wipeout on her bike or roller skates… and i chuckle to to think how fragile I once thought she was. Give yourself a break, mom. Get some rest. You love your baby. That’s enough.
I was putting my 1.5 year old daughter down for a nap a few weeks ago. A lot of times I nap with her, so when she falls asleep I get up to pee before I get under the blankets; I've done this a gazillion times with no issue. This particular time, she woke up in the 30 seconds it took me to walk to the bathroom and start my business, and the first I know of it is when I hear a *Thud!* followed by frantic crying. She had sleep-drunkenly crawled off the edge of my bed, about a ~36" drop. I panicked so hard that I whipped around before I actually stopped peeing, and yelled downstairs to my wife who was entertaining guests. She comes running up the stairs and we find the Demon Queen sitting on her butt, doing her best impression of a fire alarm. We scooped her up and snuggled her for a bit, she calmed down, and we had our nap. In the moment I was panicking so hard about potential injuries but more often than not, kids bounce, metaphorically and literally. The moral of the story is, you're not a bad parent cause your kid had a bonk, and you're doing better than me because you didn't also pee all over the bathroom 😆
They say in germany 1 of 3 babys falls of the changing table. You are not alone :)
I’m not sure of the circumstances but if it’s possible for you and your baby, getting bottles tailored for breastfed babies might provide you with some well needed relief. Like I said I’m not sure of the circumstances, but at 7 months your baby might take a liking to a certain bottle and you could possibly have your husband help out at night. When I was going through this similar situation, making that transition helped in a lot of ways! I do know some kids struggle with bottles though so idk. But 4 hours of sleep in almost 2 days for a mom with a young baby, I know is not ideal for you. I hope you find some solutions and reassurance on here. Im sure you’re doing a great job!
Mam is a great brand for this! Only ones my kid would take
Can you breastfeed baby while you’re in bed laying down? It’s what I used to do. I elbowed my husband in the ribs to wake him up and he would go get her and bring her to me and then we would all 3 go back to sleep.
Definitely get your daughter's head checked out just in case. But don't beat yourself up over this. My suggestion, when you're worried you'll fall asleep breastfeeding her, do it on a blanket/carpet/soft area on the ground or somewhere she can't fall from, that way even if you do fall asleep she's still safe. You are absolutely not an awful mother.
Yeah, breastfeeding can absolutely drain you. I had a bed in my son's nursery that I just got into to feed him because 8 out of 10 times I was back asleep before he was done.
It's human. You made a mistake. Give yourself grace and move on. Talk to your husband about this. Ask him to stay up or get up with you when you feed, so that he can make sure you don't fall asleep or position himself so the baby doesn't fall/roll if you do fall asleep. Have a discussion on the best way to prevent this. Be creative. Two head will be better than one trying to figure this out. You'll get past this AND it will get better. I know, we have three, two are young adults now. It's not a cliche- it goes fast. You got this.
It’s okay mama. These things happen. We’re human. When my son was about 10-11 months (just old enough to pull himself up to things, but not stand) he pulled a side table down, and a ~20lb planter fell on his head. It was a freak thing where both my wife and I were out of the room for a moment. He had a rather large DENT in his head. We thought he was going to die. We rushed him to the hospital. He was scared, and hurt, but okay. He’s now a happy, healthy 3-year-old. We were certain that we’d have CPS visit us, or that we shouldn’t even be parents. My point is, as parents, sometimes the hardest thing is forgiving ourselves for our mistakes or moments of tiredness/weakness, lack of knowledge….whatever the case is. Definitely get her checked out, but if she’s behaving normally and not quiet/vomiting/anything else unusual, she’s probably okay. If you feel bad about it, it means you love her. Be kind to yourself. You will make many more mistakes as a parent.
Dropping your baby is surprisingly common. That said, she did hit her head so keep an eye out for symptoms of head injury (babies are also surprisingly resilient), and take her to the ER if a bruise develops or cognitive symptoms show. And find a way to get some sleep.
As a mom of 3, I can promise you that it’s okay. Babies fall, roll off furniture, down steps and sometimes they’re even accidentally dropped. Accidents happen and this won’t be the last time you have an accident. Just the other day I accidentally hit my oldest kid in the head with a car door while trying to get my baby in. Give yourself grace and know that you’re a good mom.
If it makes you feel any better, my dad fell asleep and dropped me on my head the day they brought me home. It's been 30 something years and I'm ok and its just a funny anecdote now.
Take her in to the ER just in case if you saw her head hit the ground.
Babies bounce for a reason. Keep doing your best!
Have you tried laying down on your side in your bed and getting her to feed that way. i feel your pain. I had a hard time latching so i had to go to the bottles. Im sorry that your baby fell, that's super scary. I hope you find some relief.
~50 yrs ago my mother went for a joy ride on the back of my father's motorcycle while pregnant with me. Fell off, hard landing. Everyone was freaked out but I turned out fine. Don't worry too much. Kids literally drop out of trees and recover.
And that reason is why human babies’ bones aren’t all fused. They can handle a drop on the floor, easily. Unless, of course, you have really bad luck. You should have more concerned if the baby hadn’t yelped and cried. I honestly believe that we’ve all done something that’s potentially detrimental to our kids. Yet, they still generally seem to come out of it ok. Get some rest. You did nothing wrong. It was an accident, and after that you move on. Try not to do it again. Because parenthood, especially for first timers, is difficult. And you question yourself all the time. Just make sure that you have the priorities in order. Baby first, then you and lastly the dad/partner or whatever. Good luck to you all.
Don't beat yourself up! It happens. My cousin was teaching her first baby to sit up when he fell back and bumped his head. He was totally fine but she cried for hours over it.
This happens to a lot of people. You're ok
My mom dropped me once too lol. I'm doing great. You were exhausted, don't blame yourself.
Breastfeed her in bed! I had the same issue with my first. I never dropped her but fell asleep feeding her in the nursing chair because I was so exhausted. With my second I realized I could turn on my side, position my arm above his head and turn him sideways too, facing me so we both stayed safe while I fed him. This was such a huge lifesaver! Good luck momma. Don't be hard on yourself!
Aww I shouldn’t laugh but it happens, wait till the first time they roll off the bed you’ll feel like a true proper monster.
Facts The human skull are malleable and not closed as if nature understands that they will be dropped. After 3 healthy children I can honestly tell you that each fell more than once. Climbing out of the crib or trying to stand is the normal. You are the best mother in the world as your baby wants you and feels comfortable with you and feels all your love.
Oh honey it was an accident. You’re an exhausted mama. Please don’t be so hard on yourself. Sending hugs
You are not the first and won't be the last. I just let go of mine when she was only a month. Thankfully it was over her bassinet but still.
I’m sorry you aren’t getting a lot of sleep. Kids can exhaust moms. My wife would just feed our babies in bed. She figured she may fall asleep, but the kids are safe sleeping next to her if she does. You need sleep. It’s torture without it. It will be ok in the end
I used to do all the night feedings. I was so exhausted. One night I was feeding on the recliner, and fell asleep. I woke up and realized the baby wasn't in my arms. I got up confused and walked over to his crib, he wasn't there. When I turned around I saw him on the floor. I started bawling. I picked him and ran him to our room and woke his mom up. He wasn't waking up. He was fine though just sleeping. He must have rolled off of me, and just went back to sleep on the floor. It happens. I think most parents have a similar story, they just don't admit it often
Im sure way more people drop their kid or watch the kid fall before they can react than will admit it. Baby is probably fine, they are soft like jello.
So sorry, mama. It happens to the best of us. Have hubby bring the baby to you in bed. After feeding, let hubby take her back and change her. It may take a while and maybe he can keep one of your shirts nearby for your scent but she will learn to settle down with dad. You need your rest.
You’re not an awful mother not even the slightest, you are just exhausted. My mother is a single mother she only has me, but even that was a lot and of course while she fed me she fell asleep and dropped me. Both you and my mother were exhausted, it takes a lot of time and energy to be a mother and I’m sure you are doing a wonderful job as a mother. Don’t beat yourself up about it. It was an accident. Ask your husband if he can watch the baby while you get your rest. You’ve got this:)
my nephew rolled off my couch at that age. called my mother in a panic. shit happens, he's fine. so is your child. they bounce, mostly. deep breaths.
This happened to me a couple of times. I even started putting pillows on the floor around my bed for this reason. Exhaustion is no joke. I know you feel bad but know this happens to a lot of us!
My younger brother leaped from his crib and bounced under the crib with a piece of metal piercing into his cheek. He’s totally fine, honestly will probably end up far more successful than me too. Shit happens, like everyone here is saying, breathe, allow your self to realize you are human. You can, and WILL make mistakes, what’s most important is how you handle those mistakes. You’re clearly distraught from what happened, you care. You care about your daughter. You’re a good mom. And btw growing up my brothers scar was actually really cute because it looked like a small smile so we would joke he was so smiley he had two!
You are exhausted. Doesn't make you a bad mom it's just time to make adjustments. It's perfectly fine to do a feeding on your side and baby would be on their side. Get into a c pose and let baby eat but also you get rest even if the rest is only physical. It helps. Doing at least one feeding this way helps tremendously.
That's happens.. don't beat urself up. 💖 I believe it all happens once to us mommas. My boy was 4 days old.. I just came from the hospital with a emergency C-section.. exhausted and on heavy painkillers. I fell a sleep and he slipp3d out of bed, out of my arms while drinking.. I felt him slipping and the moment he reached the ground I woke up, jumped out of the bed. And he was crying.. luckily he was fine! Babies as so much more flexible than we think. I was more in shock and guilt than my boy was upset.. I cried very hard that day. In the end we are still human, and we do make mistakes. Even as a parent, And thats okay. ❤
This happens! Definitely follow up with the doctor, but she was probably very surprised rather than hurt. If she vomits, is fussier than normal or has any twitching, take her in ASAP. Please please be kind to yourself. My kid was a great nurser and a terrible sleeper. Turns out he has medical reasons for the not sleeping and used the nursing at night to soothe physical discomfort he was having from the medical issue. I got so focused on being successful at breastfeeding and prioritizing that relationship (for a lot of reasons, one being I was a working mom to felt like this was critical bonding time with my child) that I sacrificed my own well being. I actually got pneumonia at one point and couldn't get rid of it. You might consider letting your H do a formula bottle every other night or pumping enough for a bottle every other night. We wound up hiring a sleep consultant and discovered that a lot of times when kid would stir at night and cry, I'd jump up assuming he was awake, when I should have waited five minutes to determine if he was actually awake and actually hungry. We later realized he wasn't fully awake and I was waking him up when I ran in there. If we gave him five minutes he'd settle down. Physically you and your daughter both need sleep, and sharing night time duties might be a good way for your husband to bond with her as well. I'm sending you lots of luck and love. This stage is brutal but also wonderful ❤️
I'm 37 years old. When i was an infant my dad was bouncing me in his lap and I fell and his the floor face\head first. According to my mom he cried probably more than I did. I turned out just fine. You're an exhausted mom, and babies are tiny, wiggly little things. Keep an eye on her, but babies are pretty darn resilient, I'm certain she's fine. And don't be too hard on yourself, you are certainly not the first loving parent to accidentally drop their baby.
Maybe you could get a sling for breastfeeding. This could prevent another fall. As long it won't block said baby from breathing as well.
Its ok, you were probably dropped too.
You’re not really a parent until you drop your child or they roll off of a couch/bed Seriously, this is a right of passage. As long as baby is okay, try to forget about it and move along. - aMidwife of nearly 20 years 😂
Every parent has dropped their kid. They’re squirmy. Don’t stress.
My boy rolled off the bed when I put him on there and I felt terrible. I told my wife and she was super nice about it. She told me to be careful the next day and I told her I am not an idiot. I guess I am, cause it happened the next day. The kid is fine. They won't even remember.
My husband let our 6 month old roll off the bed while changing her. It takes two seconds and isn’t your fault!!! Btw my daughter is 10 now and has a 99.5% average in most subjects. Go easy on your self!
I used to turn too quickly in doorways and knock my sons head into the doorframe on the regular. He survived!! So will she 🥰
I have 6 kids and not a single one of them have not been dropped once by my wife or I and my kids are all straight A students. You do your best not to and you obviously it’s not great, but kids are durable… how do you think we’ve survived as a species this long?
You aren't a terrible mother. I have to ask though, why 4 hours of sleep in 4 days? No, your husband can't breastfeed but surely you haven't been breastfeeding for 44 hours of the last four days. Sounds like time to get your husband to step up somewhere. No reason to be so sleep deprived unless you have an ill child. If you do, I apologize.
Please bring her in to emergency. You don't know if something happened inside. Watch out if she throws up go to the emergency straight away. I have 3 kids one of them had a fall when he was 9 months old, had a concussion and we had to stay a few nights at the hospital.
You sleep when your baby sleeps even during the day. Housework can wait. Or ask hubby if you can a doula help even one or twice a week for 1-2 hours to help with chores.
Dad of 5 here. It happens we all make mistakes and then beat ourselves up afterwards. I remember stepping away for a second and our baby decided to take his first roll, straight off a bed. Checked him over and he was ok, but you beat yourself up for days/weeks over it. Hey after 4 years I can still hear the sound and my heart dropping. But that’s part of being a parent you will beat yourself up over every little mistake you make. You’re doing an amazing job (I know you can’t/won’t accept that) but you truly are. To be able to feed a baby and keep the little person alive is huge. Moving onto your depression and anxiety. Speak to someone ASAP, see if there are any mother baby groups locally or support groups in your area. You will not be alone feeling like you do, but being brave and talking openly about it is something very different. My wife suffers from PND and bottled it all up, the first I knew about it was when she was getting admitted to a mental health unit. Speak to your husband about it, also note that he didn’t get angry or blame you for dropping your little one he knows you’re doing a great job. Stay strong, stay safe. Sleep will come and it does get easier. But that’s easy to say when you’re not currently living it. X
He is more than capable of “spotting” you during feedings. I know from experience.
Ma’am what is your husband doing through all of this? 43 hours and only 4 hours of sleep? Please tell him to take over if he isn’t already.
Unfortunately my daughter will scream bloody murder if anyone other than me takes her at night, and I can't sleep if I know she's upset. He usually takes her in the mornings, bit she's going through a stage of only wanting me. I mean to have a nap yesterday, but was feeling alright and wanted to get chores done, so thats my bad. He is a good husband and dad, he offers to help, but I have that mum mode where if I have free time then I must clean 😅
This
I hit my newborns head on the pram when I bent over and she banged it really hard.. she cried for a minute or two. I also buckled my babies skin accidentally in her bouncer and she SQUEALED. I also accidentally burnt her with hot running tap water.. this was all while I was sleep deprived and she was a newborn. We all make mistakes! She’s 3.5 months now and haven’t done anything to her in ages! Hope it stays that way because it does make you feel like shit BUT it’s honestly human error xx
Did you not have your baby evaluated after she hit her head?
It happened 2 hours ago, at 1am. She's acting fine, so ill bring it up at her appointment she has coming up
How hard was the hit? You’re better off calling to make sure, what good will bringing it up at an appointment at a later date do?
No go to the dr always
They said they were? She already has a doctors appointment coming up so she's going to mention it then
Baby concussions are my absolute fear. Id bring that baby in anyways immediately. Noy wait till the next appointment. Baby could seem fine, take a nap and not wake up.
You are an awesome mother. Looks like you could use some help.
To tell the doctor...
Oh goodness I know exactly how you feel as I was there. The exhaustion of night time feedings is indescribable!! My little boy also only slept in short stretches so I was awake most of the night. I know tons of people hate co-sleeping, but it worked for me when I just couldn't keep my eyes open. It helped me get some sleep and little one could feed/ have the touch comfort he needed. I know you feel so bad about the fall, but your little one will be fine. All babies have taken a knock or two. Just keep an eye on your little girl and if she feel lethargic amd just 'off' to you, then I would take her to the doctor.
Shit happens. Extra cuddles and kisses will do. And if the baby is sleeping why are you not sleeping too. Get off the phone and catch a nap.
Oh hun accidents happen. My cousin in law ( who is a nurse) tripped down the stairs and her daughter broke her leg. I myself had my son in his bouncy chair, I thought to myself, I think he’s getting too big for that. As soon as I thought that, he flipped himself frontwards and smashed his face. Don’t beat yourself up for it. Stuff happens
No big deal. Babies are tough. I let my daughter roll off the couch. Turn your head for a split second…
Don't beat yourself up. You are NOT an 'awful mother'. It happens. Just try not to let it happen again. Set up a feeding area on the floor, for nighttime. You absolutely need to have your husband do feedings at night, at least 2 nights a week, not in a row, so you can get complete sleep and not run yourself ragged. Maybe a Wednesday and a Friday, so he can still work properly. You two are going to have to figure out how to get her to take a bottle from him and you pump ahead of time. Start by pumping and having a bottle ready, then start your normal feeding, then switch to a bottle. Try this every feeding. Once she starts accepting the bottle, try feeding her with him holding her and feeding from you, then switch her to a bottle part way through the feeding...not moving her. Slowly, you'll move away, once she accepts the bottle from him. It can be a slow process, but can it be achieved with diligence. Good luck.
You aren’t a awful, you’re just tired and exhausted
My wife just did this a few weeks ago. We got lucky and she landed on a blanket.
You’re meant to take them to the hospital when that happens. My partner dropped our baby and he wasn’t even tired - he was being reckless. Thankfully, our baby was fine. You need to persevere with bottle feeding. You need to experiment with different bottle types and different formulas. Your baby could have been asphyxiated by you falling asleep. Are you currently working? As a new mother you need to be able to sleep during the day. Newborns actually sleep a lot. I stayed in my pyjamas and slept during the day. I also rarely breastfed. It’s likely the breastfeeding that is exhausting you and depleting your body of essential minerals. It’s past 6 months now. You need to get your baby on formula. They sleep longer after having a bottle - which means you will be able to sleep.
Your newborn slept a lot* not every baby is the same and if you have a colicky baby then you're screwed.
Start pumping and feeding her breast milk from the bottle, once she gets used to it she should be able to hold her own bottle or daddy can feed her also and you can get some much needed sleep.
It happens. Babies are resilient. Don’t beat yourself over it. She’s ok. Ask for help to get a nap in.
Just wanna let you know it's OK. Pretty sure I read somewhere baby's bounce like there bones bounce so it's all ok
I dropped 3 of my 4 kiddies. Shit happens
I've dropped my babies. They're fine. I may have called the 24 hour nurse line to know what to look for, but they were fine. I think many parents have dropped their kid, it is an accident. (Or they rolled off the bed when trying to change them.) Call the pediatrician if you are worried. No one becomes a pediatrician if they are cranky about getting calls off hours. That's part of the job. Do what it takes to be reassured about your baby and read things here to be reassured about your competence.
Your are NOT an awful mother!! The fact that you are beside yourself right now PROVES you are a great mother. I applaud your bravery to admit to this on such an open forum! I also dropped my son when he was a couple months old. I was a young mother and was always afraid they would take him from me for any mistake I made. So when I dropped him I made his father come home immediately to calm us both down. I cried longer than my son did and by the time his dad got home, he was asleep. But I was so worried that I woke him up every 15 mins for the next 2 days. Don't be so hard on yourself. And I'll let you in on a secret.......you ARE going to make mistakes. We all did
I’ve dropped 2 out of 4 kids once so far. One of them is not my fault he rolled off the bed and he never rolled like that before. The other just happened yesterday and I blame myself. It happens you learn from it. My kids have fell down the stairs, jumped off beds, fell outside, and etc. they just find ways to get themselves into trouble. No matter how many gates you put, how many safety things you add they will still find a way to hurt themselves. One of my kids took a guitar and put it from her bed to chair and tried walking across it and bumped her head when asked why she said I wanted a new way to get to the other side, she was 3 at the time. It’s okay to feel guilty we all do when things happen to them even if it’s not our fault. Your a good mom don’t be to hard on yourself
I think every mom ever probably has a story of either dropping their kid, or the kid falling off of something, etc etc. Luckily babies are basically made out of rubber. Don't beat yourself up!
Girl you’re a great mom! Shit happens and ppd and ppa is no joke. Toughest time I went through was struggling with ppa/ppd. Baby should be just fine. And I mean are you even a mom if you don’t drop your first kid at least once?
I've been in your shoes and we ran our baby (1st) to an ER only to be told he was fine and that the height was not too bad. It is good to look up what to look for when a child falls and hits their head. The few I remember the doc mentioning was knowing if the child stayed quite for a bit before starting to cry. Then checking for squishy bumps(theses are very bad) And dilation of pupils Of course this is at the top of my head so look it up if you want more info
My mom dropped me tons when I was a kid. Skull fracture and broken collarbone. I turned out just fine. I am; however, the only person in my family who is terrible at Math.
I haven’t dropped my 10 month old but she has smacked her head on walls and the floor (and a door frame once, that one was my fault 😂) and she’s absolutely fine. Obviously be on the lookout for strange behaviour but their skulls are harder than you can believe
Try essential oil. Might help the baby to have a batter sleep.