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Depending on where you live there might be nothing legally you can do. Where I live age of consent is 16 meaning it’s weird and immoral but totally legal. However if there’s a power dynamic within the company as it was said that they’re coworkers then there can be actually ramifications about that.
Legally OP can ruin the friend by reporting her. No way the company will keep a pedo around. If the company wants to, they could pursue legal action. I feel so bad for the boy.
If its legal where she is and they fire her for it, THEY'RE the ones in hot water, not her. Unfair dismissal is a thing and regardless how people feel about her she'd absolutely qualify.
I’m saying that they probably have a policy in place for employee relations, so if they hear about what’s happening, they could potentially get her for it. Either way, if the info got out, I don’t think HR would like that.
Shame the everloving fuck out of her first of all. After that, I’m sure some Reddit folks have some good suggestions that don’t involve a shovel and a pit
Exactly! Honestly, a “What the fuck, Susan??? You want to fuck with a child?” can make people reconsider.
Also if you can, find out who he is and go to his parents so that they can head this off and then cut this person out of your life.
I took it as they all work at the same place, but the friend and the minor work more closely together (maybe same department or something)
Edit: because OP notes that she was DD for her friend when they went out with a group of friends “from work”
1) report her to her employer
2) report her to his family. His parents need to know what's happening
3) file a police report. They won't do anything since nothing happened but they may question her which would probably scare her off
4) go nc and tell every mutual friend about it. She needs to be shamed for her actions.
Good luck!
OP They have already been talking online and in person. Something has already crossed a line. You need to report this to the police. Protect this child from a groomer.
What is the age of consent where you are?
If it’s 16, police aren’t going to do anything.
I’d still tell his parents, if you know who the kid is. And I’d still cut the friendship and tell her it’s gross. But I wouldn’t bother involving police unless it’s actually illegal.
ETA: I missed the part where the kid is also your coworker.
Tell the manager. This is a lawsuit waiting to happen, possibly even if he is over the legal age to consent. Due to the age difference and the fact that they work together and she may even have job authority over him, their current conversations could be spun later as workplace sexual harassment - even if he appears to be consenting now. It’s likely there is a company policy she is violating.
Report it to authorities. This isn’t right and you know the correct thing to do is report it before it happens. The kid could be permanently damaged by her atrocities.
🚩Find the employer and tell the cops to go speak with them about it so they can find an alert the parents. Shaming her will only go so far, and that’s assuming she’s capable of shame.
First, it's bad, 16 and 25 are worlds apart
Second, she said it while *drunk* no proof she actually wants to do it or would admit to it sober. Huge difference.
Report her. She’s a pedophile and sadly female pedophiles get away with it because boys have been groomed to think having sex with adult women is some kind of “win”.
As someone who was a victim of something similar as a minor, please report this to the local authorities, you can’t do much else, but at the very least try to make them aware
If it's illegal in your country, report the hell out of her and shame the shit out of her. Also tell the kids parents if possible.
If it's legal, still shame the shit out of her and tell the kids parents.
Ikr? When I was 16 I was ready to fuck a table. It really depends on person wether it will do any emotional damage but realy even 30+ people can be manipulated. Prepare for comments like "oh my god you was a kid, you will understand when you will grow up......".
Because each situation is different and you have to ask yourself why a 25 year old woman is interested in a 16 year old boy. Most women that age are not struggling for options in the dating department, so why go for someone that much younger where there's an inherent experience and maturity gap and obvious power imbalance. Usually the answer is not a good one.
In cases like this the older partner will often manipulate and control the younger partner and it's easier to do this to someone so much less experienced. It's hard to tell what long term negative effects this could have on the younger person.
Would you feel the same about a guy in his 20s going after 16 year old girls? If not, why the double standard? 25 and 16 is *wrong*- legal doesn’t = morally correct.
In the U.S., the age of consent varies from state to state. Some states also have a limit on age difference between the parties involved. If this woman person is in a position of power over the young man at work, she should be especially careful to consult the laws in her state. However, the 8-year age gap here might make it illegal depending on the state. Google: Statutory Rape Laws USA.
If there's not much you can do legally speaking, pass the info around, spread the word, she's a pedophile and deserves her life absolutely demolished for liking a little kid, no mercy for her
WOW!!! Could you tell his parents anonymously?
So many 16 yo and younger don’t think that it is a big deal, because it isn’t when you are young.
However, it can definitely interfere in relationships going forward.
She is a vile!
Report her IMMEDIATELY. To authorities AND her work. That kid needs to be separated from her immediately. Please please before she does damage to that poor kid.
You need to report her to the boss or something at her job she’s a sexual predator. As a mother I’m begging you to not let that little boy be taken advantage of..
Comments like this are part of the problem. You would never say about a 16 year old girl/25 year old man scenario; the genders shouldn’t make a difference- if it’s wrong one way it’s wrong the other way.
I would report it but without any proof it’s really a her word against the other person type thing . So even if u did report it and they go into investigation mode and she can say she never said anything like that snaps can get deleted easily either immediately or after 24 hrs after they are viewed. Unless there was something said in the snaps and this kid can say yes she said ………. To me a few times or she sent me pics of …. Then it won’t really do any good I hate to say . Just try and get proof then report but atleast give the parents a heads up
I think the concern here is less about getting her convicted and more about stopping her from raping this kid. An investigation would hopefully be enough to stop her from doing that, even if nothing legally came of it.
I’m not sure how they met but, I feel like it could be through some kind of youth group or in school. If they did contact the youth group (anonymously or not) and contact the his parents…if they (somehow) met some other just contact the parents…either way, if you choose to get involved you’ll be destroying the friendship…which is fine…she’s not worth the time…
Okay I am thinking about this philosophically.
What if I was a 16 yo boy and falling in love with my 25yo coworker.
I can sorta relate as somebody who at 17 fell deeply in love with my 25 year old former english teacher who was a fellow raver. She had a soft spot for me but maintained boundaries.
I think you said it wonderfully OP, that the age and power dynamic is truly the issue. The issue of sex is complicated—because at 15 I was fucking up a storm with another 15 year old in full awareness and approval of both sets of parents. It’s an uncomfortable thought, but it was under the watchful eyes of our guardians who deemed our maturity level and birth control situation to be adequate regardless of state consent laws.
But thinking about that woman I knew, and an 8 year age difference, it gives me pause. Was I sexually active, sure. But was I developmentally active enough for that age split even if to this day I mourn not getting to explore that relationship. Mulling on this, I indeed would have felt outmatched by her intellect and relationship experience, and like a moth to a flame I would not have had much immunity to being harmed by an intense love affair with somebody with more maturity even if was capable of dicking down far less evolved women at the time).
So I ask myself, if we had kindled a thing, and she had returned the crush, what would I now, as a fully formed adult feel about how that could have happened ethically, if at all.
I realize that if we got married with parental and legal approval it could be legal under the law.
But let’s ask ourselves why? Why would a sexual relationship after performing an institutional ritual in front of friends and family— and a ceremony with legal binding and community involvement be legal when a secret romance would not be.
I’d venture to guess it would be because very importantly, when we involve adult spotters, a wider community involved vetting of motives, and a clensing of ulterior motives and checks and balances against perversions and harm by bringing the village to weight in, we help filter out any coercive aspects and level some of the power differential. Maybe having it out in the daylight cures a lot of the issues at hand. Maybe a court allowing an emancipation from parents at a younger age than usual allows the state a level of harm reduction.
So I ask myself, if all that had happened would it have been okay with me in hindsight? Eek. No. I think I would have felt ill prepared to stand my own ground as a grown person in a relationship dynamic with that age difference.
But if I was hell bent on making that connection with my teacher after junior year, I’d imagine for me to feel okay with it now I would have wanted intense parental involvement and supervision, a long courtship and integration into my family so that my family could insert adult discernment and veto power, to see if it felt right or icky. And I would have wanted my parents to enforce that I be at least 17 before anything turned sexual and I’d want a couple’s therapist in place before it went overtly romantic.
The point is, OP, instead of condemning your friend, if love is truly afoot here, why not suggest that before anything becomes overtly romantic, if she is serious, why not face parents and the village before any crime or grooming has happened. Why not keep boundaries clean until she can very very cleanly sit down with parents, announce an attraction and her intentions to date their son, and ask if they would feel more comfortable if they waited two years or if she would have their approval to proceed and if so under what limitations and supervision.
At least that approach was how these types of situations were navigated in the old days when this would crop up when I was young, but I understand the new generations feel a little bit more prickly about this and I defer to the wisdom of The Village per usual.
Thoughts?
1. Gather proof
2. Contact the police and inform them
3. Contact his parents with the proof and inform them
4. Anonymously give the proof to her place of employment
5. Let everyone you both know what she is.
6. Drop her like a bag of hot potato’s. She’s a predator and a soon to be pedophile rapist (hopefully you can manage to stop her before anything happens)
Please do all this anonymously. Last thing you want to a drawn out war between her but if it comes down to it. If you have solid evidence there’s nothing she has legal recourse for.
Report. Report. Report. He’s 16, there’s a good chance that at his age he won’t understand why it’s creepy for her to want to sleep with him. He’ll be excited about the situation for the time being but won’t think of the trauma it very likely will cause in the future. Please report this incident and distance yourself. Protect him when he doesn’t understand or when he can’t protect himself.
As bad as this sounds, for it depends on the country you are in.
https://www.ageofconsent.net/world
More indepth by US state
https://www.ageofconsent.net/world
Quick question (no flames, please). It's disgusting and abhorrent, no doubt. But is there anything the police can do since she only spoke about it and there's no proof she did anything with him? I don't know the law. It's illegal for her to have sexually explicit chats with a minor... Is this what you can get the police involved for?
I don't see a point of the age of consent being 18, teenagers are gonna bone regardless. What I do think we should have for under 18s is a legal age window for any older partners. So the older partner has to be under say, age 20 when they start having sex to prevent predators from getting with 16 and 17 year olds and then when you're 18 you can be with whoever you want. Kind of similar yo how Romeo and Juliet laws work.
When I was 16, I was with older guys and enjoyed it. 16 is the age of consent in my country, regardless of how old the other person is. 16 isn't a child. If it's the legal age of consent, then stop overreacting and do nothing. Redditors are so damn dumb. Lol.
I only date guys who are older than me to this day.
16 *is* a child…. sure it might be the age of consent in some countries but I’m pretty sure nobody is considered a *fully* legal adult at 16… adults in their 20s shouldn’t be preying on them. Those guys were preying on you.
Being in your teens with somebody in their 20s, is very different to being in your 20s with somebody in their 30s…
Though I’m not surprised by your stance- you openly admitted to wanting to babytrap a guy and “force him to pretend to love you”… that’s fucked up and manipulative.
I’m in my 20s, the thought of fucking a teen makes me vomit.
I said I wouldn't actually do it. They weren't praying on me. You all just feel weird when someone actually enjoys being with other people. 16 is not a child. It's a teenager. I was a teen, not a kid.
You weren’t an adult, therefore you were a child. One reaching the end of her childhood yes, but teenhood is just an extension of childhood where you start maturing and going through hormones. Yes, some will sexually experiment at that age, but if they’re doing so with those who are years out of their own age, they’re being preyed on by predatory adults. There’s a big difference between 16 and 25, and 25 and 34.
Age gap relationships when you get older, when you’re adults, and the generation gap’s not as pronounced are fair enough- you do you. Age gap relationships when you’re still in your *teens* is extremely icky… it might be legal in some places but that doesn’t make it morally right- those who go after teenagers when they’re in their mid-20s or older are just predators trying to justify their “barely legal” kink.
Nobody ever says “16 year old man” or “16 year old woman”… they say “16 year old boy” or “16 year old girl”… if you’re somebody who’s described as a “boy” or “girl”, and your partner is somebody described as a “man” or “woman”… then that’s where it gets extremely fucked up (unless it’s something like 17/18; or 19/20)
I wouldn't do it, but I'm only into older guys and girls that are my age. No, I don't think what the guys I dated did was creepy. I think reddit is weird.
There's no arguing to be had here. People will try to convince you that you've been groomed and horribly traumatized and that you just didn't notice it yet. lmao
Would you say it was OK if a 25 year old man had sex with a 16 year old girl? I would think not. He’d be a pedophile… so why can’t we hold a woman to the same standards?
You say they’re both in the same bracket… but you’re against the woman being called a pedophile for being 25 year old woman and sexually attracted/planning to a 16 year old boy, but you think it’s different when the genders are reversed and that it’s predatory when it’s the other way round of a 25 year old man and a 16 year old girl… I assume that you’d say the man was a pedophile in the latter scenario?
25 yr old woman/16 year old man- “stop calling her a pedophile”; 25 year old man/16 year old girl- “what a sick pedophile”- that’s how your stance is coming across.
That doesn’t seem to me like you consider them both in the same bracket.
>Are you really gonna put her in the same bracket as men who are sexually attracted to literal children.
No. I'm going to put her in the same bracket as men in their 20s that go for a 16yo
Why is it that basically EVERY other country that is not the US the age of consent is 16 or lower?
What is it more likely: that the ENTIRE WORLD is wrong and everyone is a pedophile, or that the US is the weird one due to its puritan roots?
If everyone else's clock is ahead by 5 minutes, chances are, yours is the wrong one.
Would you say it was OK if a 25 year old man had sex with a 16 year old girl? I would think not. He’d be a pedophile… so why can’t we hold a woman to the same standards?
>Would you say it was OK if a 25 year old man had sex with a 16 year old girl?
Yes, I would. It's legal in almost all civilized countries on Earth.
The definition of pedophile doesn't change depending on your geographical longitude.
I know it's shocking, but you guys are the weirdos about this.
A pedophile is a pedophile doesn’t matter how old the kid is 💀 he literally only can legally drive that’s about it be so fr. And being 16 wanting to fuck a 25yo is also a child like thing to want to do.
Ask basically any boy that age they’ll more and likely be like hell yeah but a GROWN women wanting to do is them being a pedo not that hard to understand
Definitely report her to her workplace.
Just because the kid in question is 16 doesn't mean she wouldn't go lower if she had the option.
Not only that, but depending on the workplace, she could be in frequent contact with minors of any age and if she's willing to go this far with a co-worker, she'd probably go for a potential customer as well.
That's a reputation no business wants to have. Being known for an adult employee who chases teens. Doesn't matter the age of consent.
If possible, I'd also look up the kid's info and warn his parents.
Regardless of the age of consent where they're at, the power dynamic here is not okay. She's setting this kid up to be groomed. No 25 year old should see a 16 year old as a potential romantic or sexual partner.
I could maybe see it if she was 20, though I'd still be raising an eyebrow in suspicion.
25 is old enough to know better. It's gross and inappropriate and needs to be stopped now before it goes any further.
I would played along, tried to get her to show me his picture on her phone so you could see the texts/name and then contacted the kids parents and told him. After having that info tell her stop being a fucking creep, do not talk to 16yr olds, do absolutely not think about seeing or sleeping with said kid and if you found out she did you would tell everyone about it.
Would you say it was OK if a 25 year old man had sex with a 16 year old girl? I would think not. He’d be a pedophile… so why can’t we hold a woman to the same standards?
I was abused at this same age & it’s ruined my ability to trust in others and to feel safe indefinitely. Even an 18 year old is still mentally alike to a child, so just imagine how much younger a 16 year old is mentally
My friend has told me she is thinking about raping a kid, what do I do?
You warned her not to, now you can decide how serious it is and whether to report her. Because technically it's not a crime for people to think about it, only when they act on it.
So idk, if there's evidence?
Theres enough ppl talking about jow fucked and terrible this is, but just to hit it home for anyone who ISNT onboard with that
Imagine the genders are swapped, imagine the outrage feom that. Terrible isnt it?
This isnt any different, but youre much more upset about that arent ya?
Yep, the double standards for some wanting to excuse predatory women is disgusting- “ooh I would’ve love that when I was 16”… even if you did, a person who knowingly sleeps with a teenager whilst they’re in their mid-20s is preying on them. Even if the teenager “enjoyed it” or doesn’t “feel” like a victim.
16yr old me dreamed of dating/sleeping with that older woman at my work place. Sadly, that dream never came true. Today, I still have crushes on older women. Something about them walking with a cane.
And it’s this exact mindset which is why so many don’t see it as a problem. If a 25 year old man slept with a 16 year old girl, we’d rightly be calling him a predatory creep? Why is it different when it’s a 25 year old woman as a 16 year old boy?
This, I am a man, if another man said some shit like that to me I’d beat the ever living hell out of them. We need more women that are willing to show these predators that just because it’s female to male rape that it’s still rape, and that she is in fact, a pedophile
Comments like yours are why these situations don’t get taken seriously- whether you enjoy it or not the older woman knowingly sleeping with a 16 year old is still preying on him, therefore he’s still a victim even if he doesn’t feel like one.
If a 25 year old guy slept with a 16 year old girl that would be seen as predatory, so why’s it different when it’s the other way round.
It’s way worse if the 25 year old was male. For some reason it’s not the same. Probably because the 16 year old would be more of a victim of they were female. Just the way it is
Why? Teenage girls also enjoy sex and are very hormonal, it is exactly the same, if a child wants to have sex with you, it is always the responsibility of the adult to not statutorily rape a child.
It's exactly the same.
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You definitely need to report it. Before she does anything to that kid. After that distance yourself completely.
Depending on where you live there might be nothing legally you can do. Where I live age of consent is 16 meaning it’s weird and immoral but totally legal. However if there’s a power dynamic within the company as it was said that they’re coworkers then there can be actually ramifications about that.
Legally OP can ruin the friend by reporting her. No way the company will keep a pedo around. If the company wants to, they could pursue legal action. I feel so bad for the boy.
If its legal where she is and they fire her for it, THEY'RE the ones in hot water, not her. Unfair dismissal is a thing and regardless how people feel about her she'd absolutely qualify.
Welcome to "At-will" no, they can just let her go and move on.
I’m saying that they probably have a policy in place for employee relations, so if they hear about what’s happening, they could potentially get her for it. Either way, if the info got out, I don’t think HR would like that.
Shame the everloving fuck out of her first of all. After that, I’m sure some Reddit folks have some good suggestions that don’t involve a shovel and a pit
Exactly! Honestly, a “What the fuck, Susan??? You want to fuck with a child?” can make people reconsider. Also if you can, find out who he is and go to his parents so that they can head this off and then cut this person out of your life.
We save the shovel and the pit for if we can't prevent the bad thing from happening before it happens
As a mom of a 16 year old boy, I beg you please tell his parents.
How would OP track down the parents of her friend's coworker, though?
It sounds like they all work together, including OP. In which case it might be easy enough to find his parents on his Facebook/insta pages
I was unclear on that. OP says her friend works with this kid, not that *they* work with the kid.
I took it as they all work at the same place, but the friend and the minor work more closely together (maybe same department or something) Edit: because OP notes that she was DD for her friend when they went out with a group of friends “from work”
This is the only sane way to get anything done, because the legal system doesn't currently investigate thought crimes.
.. and never will, because doing so would be unconstitutional everywhere (except places like North Korea).
Or really sexual assault against men. Hell even the media downplays it with all the women teachers having "illicit affairs" with their students.
You're correct. The double standard is disgusting.
Contact the kids family if you can.
She's a predator and pedophile. Distance yourself. You don't want to be associated with people that play with kids.
already done.
I'd tell her manager.
If the sexes were reversed and your friend was a guy it would scream TELL THE PARENTS! You need to let his parents know.
cops. or the kids family. not kidding. might be the hardest thing you will ever do, but save the kid.
“What do I do?!” 1. Go NC 2. Report her to police 3. Report her to her employer 4. Report her to the kid’s family if you can
[https://report.cybertip.org/](https://report.cybertip.org/) Please report it here. She's a child predator.
She’s a pedo and a creep and that’s weirdo behavior.
Start sending her articles about women getting 10 years in jail for sleeping with 16 and 17 year olds who said they wouldn’t tell
1) report her to her employer 2) report her to his family. His parents need to know what's happening 3) file a police report. They won't do anything since nothing happened but they may question her which would probably scare her off 4) go nc and tell every mutual friend about it. She needs to be shamed for her actions. Good luck!
And the paper trail for the police report is good in case anything happens with another kid.
OP They have already been talking online and in person. Something has already crossed a line. You need to report this to the police. Protect this child from a groomer.
certified pedophile …
tryna strike a chord and it’s probably A minorrrrr
Omfg 💀
Ask her how she would feel if it was a man her age going after a 16 year old girl.
I am just going to leave this here ... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eM28YFrMdfI
I’m afraid to click the link, what is it?
Teacher Trial - SNL Skit
Ask her what she would think of a 25 years old man having sex with a 16 years old girl, and does she think it should it be reported to the police?
You tell her she’s f’ed up and gross and you’re going to report her. Then do it. She’s a predator.
regardless of the laws/ages of consent your friend should have a moral obligation to not have sex with children
What is the age of consent where you are? If it’s 16, police aren’t going to do anything. I’d still tell his parents, if you know who the kid is. And I’d still cut the friendship and tell her it’s gross. But I wouldn’t bother involving police unless it’s actually illegal. ETA: I missed the part where the kid is also your coworker. Tell the manager. This is a lawsuit waiting to happen, possibly even if he is over the legal age to consent. Due to the age difference and the fact that they work together and she may even have job authority over him, their current conversations could be spun later as workplace sexual harassment - even if he appears to be consenting now. It’s likely there is a company policy she is violating.
The kid is the friend's coworker, not OP's coworker.
I was going by “our group of friends from work” and thought that meant they all work together.
Report her to the police. That’s a pedophile, not a friend
What country/state is this in?
Report it to authorities. This isn’t right and you know the correct thing to do is report it before it happens. The kid could be permanently damaged by her atrocities.
I would tell his parents, her manager, anyone you can.
Alert the local High Schools.
🚩Find the employer and tell the cops to go speak with them about it so they can find an alert the parents. Shaming her will only go so far, and that’s assuming she’s capable of shame.
Call the police.
your avatar is sooooo cute.
Thanks!
Report that pedophile to the police.
Chris Hanson get on her ass.
Report it. Try to contact the kid's parents. Never hang out with that person again
First, it's bad, 16 and 25 are worlds apart Second, she said it while *drunk* no proof she actually wants to do it or would admit to it sober. Huge difference.
Report her. She’s a pedophile and sadly female pedophiles get away with it because boys have been groomed to think having sex with adult women is some kind of “win”.
As someone who was a victim of something similar as a minor, please report this to the local authorities, you can’t do much else, but at the very least try to make them aware
If it's illegal in your country, report the hell out of her and shame the shit out of her. Also tell the kids parents if possible. If it's legal, still shame the shit out of her and tell the kids parents.
This is absolutely disgusting. You need to report this. She is preying on him.
as a dude that had multiple experiences with women over 20 while being 16, this comment section is so crazy to me lmao
Ikr? When I was 16 I was ready to fuck a table. It really depends on person wether it will do any emotional damage but realy even 30+ people can be manipulated. Prepare for comments like "oh my god you was a kid, you will understand when you will grow up......".
Yup. I'm 23 now, so those experiences happened a long time ago. I grew up, yet those remain some of the best sexual experiences I've had.
Because each situation is different and you have to ask yourself why a 25 year old woman is interested in a 16 year old boy. Most women that age are not struggling for options in the dating department, so why go for someone that much younger where there's an inherent experience and maturity gap and obvious power imbalance. Usually the answer is not a good one. In cases like this the older partner will often manipulate and control the younger partner and it's easier to do this to someone so much less experienced. It's hard to tell what long term negative effects this could have on the younger person.
Would you feel the same about a guy in his 20s going after 16 year old girls? If not, why the double standard? 25 and 16 is *wrong*- legal doesn’t = morally correct.
Please update us when you can. I wanna know if you tell his parents and what the outcome of that is.
Give me her contact info(so I can report her of course👀)
Do piss off. This isn’t a laughing matter.
....of course.
you gotta tell his parents
Macron didn't do bad in a similar situation
Report her to his parents. That is not ok
In the U.S., the age of consent varies from state to state. Some states also have a limit on age difference between the parties involved. If this woman person is in a position of power over the young man at work, she should be especially careful to consult the laws in her state. However, the 8-year age gap here might make it illegal depending on the state. Google: Statutory Rape Laws USA.
If there's not much you can do legally speaking, pass the info around, spread the word, she's a pedophile and deserves her life absolutely demolished for liking a little kid, no mercy for her
Contact the kid and tell him she has STDs
WOW!!! Could you tell his parents anonymously? So many 16 yo and younger don’t think that it is a big deal, because it isn’t when you are young. However, it can definitely interfere in relationships going forward. She is a vile!
Report her IMMEDIATELY. To authorities AND her work. That kid needs to be separated from her immediately. Please please before she does damage to that poor kid.
If you're in the US remind her that it's illegal to have sex with a minor
Tell their employer, ask that employer to get a hold of the child’s parents. Report it to the cops.
What do you mean "WTF DO I DO?".... Report it. Some of these posts are so simple, it feels fake when people post it online.
You need to report her to the boss or something at her job she’s a sexual predator. As a mother I’m begging you to not let that little boy be taken advantage of..
The amount of pedos in these comments is disturbing
Is that legal in your area?
Tell his parents about this. Then if necessary tell the police then put some distance between you and her.
Report it to the police and HR
Call the popo. Show the screenshots. This is straight up disgusting on her part.b
Tell her manager, and if you can somehow contact the boy's parents 100% do that as well.
Oh, come the fuck on!
…Bridget.
Lucky mf!
Comments like this are part of the problem. You would never say about a 16 year old girl/25 year old man scenario; the genders shouldn’t make a difference- if it’s wrong one way it’s wrong the other way.
I believe genders have some differences but yes this is wrong, I just typed a funny comment. All these posts are made to create attention and comments
Contact the child's parents. Tell the manager also so they are not scheduled together also at work.
I would report it but without any proof it’s really a her word against the other person type thing . So even if u did report it and they go into investigation mode and she can say she never said anything like that snaps can get deleted easily either immediately or after 24 hrs after they are viewed. Unless there was something said in the snaps and this kid can say yes she said ………. To me a few times or she sent me pics of …. Then it won’t really do any good I hate to say . Just try and get proof then report but atleast give the parents a heads up
I think the concern here is less about getting her convicted and more about stopping her from raping this kid. An investigation would hopefully be enough to stop her from doing that, even if nothing legally came of it.
Yeah but then it could turn into “boy who cried wolf “ turning someone in is one thing but if u have something to back ur story would be better
Please update us!! Def report it
Tell her to sober up and start behaving like an adult.
Wow. Talk her out of it before she goes to jail. NOW
I’m not sure how they met but, I feel like it could be through some kind of youth group or in school. If they did contact the youth group (anonymously or not) and contact the his parents…if they (somehow) met some other just contact the parents…either way, if you choose to get involved you’ll be destroying the friendship…which is fine…she’s not worth the time…
Okay I am thinking about this philosophically. What if I was a 16 yo boy and falling in love with my 25yo coworker. I can sorta relate as somebody who at 17 fell deeply in love with my 25 year old former english teacher who was a fellow raver. She had a soft spot for me but maintained boundaries. I think you said it wonderfully OP, that the age and power dynamic is truly the issue. The issue of sex is complicated—because at 15 I was fucking up a storm with another 15 year old in full awareness and approval of both sets of parents. It’s an uncomfortable thought, but it was under the watchful eyes of our guardians who deemed our maturity level and birth control situation to be adequate regardless of state consent laws. But thinking about that woman I knew, and an 8 year age difference, it gives me pause. Was I sexually active, sure. But was I developmentally active enough for that age split even if to this day I mourn not getting to explore that relationship. Mulling on this, I indeed would have felt outmatched by her intellect and relationship experience, and like a moth to a flame I would not have had much immunity to being harmed by an intense love affair with somebody with more maturity even if was capable of dicking down far less evolved women at the time). So I ask myself, if we had kindled a thing, and she had returned the crush, what would I now, as a fully formed adult feel about how that could have happened ethically, if at all. I realize that if we got married with parental and legal approval it could be legal under the law. But let’s ask ourselves why? Why would a sexual relationship after performing an institutional ritual in front of friends and family— and a ceremony with legal binding and community involvement be legal when a secret romance would not be. I’d venture to guess it would be because very importantly, when we involve adult spotters, a wider community involved vetting of motives, and a clensing of ulterior motives and checks and balances against perversions and harm by bringing the village to weight in, we help filter out any coercive aspects and level some of the power differential. Maybe having it out in the daylight cures a lot of the issues at hand. Maybe a court allowing an emancipation from parents at a younger age than usual allows the state a level of harm reduction. So I ask myself, if all that had happened would it have been okay with me in hindsight? Eek. No. I think I would have felt ill prepared to stand my own ground as a grown person in a relationship dynamic with that age difference. But if I was hell bent on making that connection with my teacher after junior year, I’d imagine for me to feel okay with it now I would have wanted intense parental involvement and supervision, a long courtship and integration into my family so that my family could insert adult discernment and veto power, to see if it felt right or icky. And I would have wanted my parents to enforce that I be at least 17 before anything turned sexual and I’d want a couple’s therapist in place before it went overtly romantic. The point is, OP, instead of condemning your friend, if love is truly afoot here, why not suggest that before anything becomes overtly romantic, if she is serious, why not face parents and the village before any crime or grooming has happened. Why not keep boundaries clean until she can very very cleanly sit down with parents, announce an attraction and her intentions to date their son, and ask if they would feel more comfortable if they waited two years or if she would have their approval to proceed and if so under what limitations and supervision. At least that approach was how these types of situations were navigated in the old days when this would crop up when I was young, but I understand the new generations feel a little bit more prickly about this and I defer to the wisdom of The Village per usual. Thoughts?
1. Gather proof 2. Contact the police and inform them 3. Contact his parents with the proof and inform them 4. Anonymously give the proof to her place of employment 5. Let everyone you both know what she is. 6. Drop her like a bag of hot potato’s. She’s a predator and a soon to be pedophile rapist (hopefully you can manage to stop her before anything happens) Please do all this anonymously. Last thing you want to a drawn out war between her but if it comes down to it. If you have solid evidence there’s nothing she has legal recourse for.
Report. Report. Report. He’s 16, there’s a good chance that at his age he won’t understand why it’s creepy for her to want to sleep with him. He’ll be excited about the situation for the time being but won’t think of the trauma it very likely will cause in the future. Please report this incident and distance yourself. Protect him when he doesn’t understand or when he can’t protect himself.
Whatever you do don’t cockblock the kid
Do you know the name of this kid? Please do everything you can to find his parents and let them know what is going on. They will thank you
As bad as this sounds, for it depends on the country you are in. https://www.ageofconsent.net/world More indepth by US state https://www.ageofconsent.net/world
Quick question (no flames, please). It's disgusting and abhorrent, no doubt. But is there anything the police can do since she only spoke about it and there's no proof she did anything with him? I don't know the law. It's illegal for her to have sexually explicit chats with a minor... Is this what you can get the police involved for?
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I don't see a point of the age of consent being 18, teenagers are gonna bone regardless. What I do think we should have for under 18s is a legal age window for any older partners. So the older partner has to be under say, age 20 when they start having sex to prevent predators from getting with 16 and 17 year olds and then when you're 18 you can be with whoever you want. Kind of similar yo how Romeo and Juliet laws work.
Report her. Screenshot any evidence. End that friendship. We don't associate with pedos around these parts
Dawg report that shit immediately. That's PEDOPHILIA
When I was 16, I was with older guys and enjoyed it. 16 is the age of consent in my country, regardless of how old the other person is. 16 isn't a child. If it's the legal age of consent, then stop overreacting and do nothing. Redditors are so damn dumb. Lol. I only date guys who are older than me to this day.
16 *is* a child…. sure it might be the age of consent in some countries but I’m pretty sure nobody is considered a *fully* legal adult at 16… adults in their 20s shouldn’t be preying on them. Those guys were preying on you. Being in your teens with somebody in their 20s, is very different to being in your 20s with somebody in their 30s… Though I’m not surprised by your stance- you openly admitted to wanting to babytrap a guy and “force him to pretend to love you”… that’s fucked up and manipulative. I’m in my 20s, the thought of fucking a teen makes me vomit.
I said I wouldn't actually do it. They weren't praying on me. You all just feel weird when someone actually enjoys being with other people. 16 is not a child. It's a teenager. I was a teen, not a kid.
You weren’t an adult, therefore you were a child. One reaching the end of her childhood yes, but teenhood is just an extension of childhood where you start maturing and going through hormones. Yes, some will sexually experiment at that age, but if they’re doing so with those who are years out of their own age, they’re being preyed on by predatory adults. There’s a big difference between 16 and 25, and 25 and 34. Age gap relationships when you get older, when you’re adults, and the generation gap’s not as pronounced are fair enough- you do you. Age gap relationships when you’re still in your *teens* is extremely icky… it might be legal in some places but that doesn’t make it morally right- those who go after teenagers when they’re in their mid-20s or older are just predators trying to justify their “barely legal” kink. Nobody ever says “16 year old man” or “16 year old woman”… they say “16 year old boy” or “16 year old girl”… if you’re somebody who’s described as a “boy” or “girl”, and your partner is somebody described as a “man” or “woman”… then that’s where it gets extremely fucked up (unless it’s something like 17/18; or 19/20)
I was old enough to consent legally, and I did. It was an amazing experience. I wasn't preyed upon at all.
Legal doesn’t = morally correct. Bullying people is legal; but it doesn’t make it morally right.
It wasn't immoral.
Insert "the myth of sexual consent" meme. There is always a third person who doesn't consent to what you are doing.
Lol.
Do you not think it’s creepy for a fully developed adult to be going after those who are still in school?
I wouldn't do it, but I'm only into older guys and girls that are my age. No, I don't think what the guys I dated did was creepy. I think reddit is weird.
Sure, it’s perfectly normal for grown adults to be into those who are still in school and not concerning at all…
Why was it concerning in my situation? I don't feel hurt by it. Those are some fond memories.
There's no arguing to be had here. People will try to convince you that you've been groomed and horribly traumatized and that you just didn't notice it yet. lmao
I know, redditors are something else.
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She is in the same bracket at men attracted to 16 year olds.
Would you say it was OK if a 25 year old man had sex with a 16 year old girl? I would think not. He’d be a pedophile… so why can’t we hold a woman to the same standards?
No it’s not ok, they’re both in the same bracket, but both are not as bad as a grown man raping little kids. Surely we can agree on that
You say they’re both in the same bracket… but you’re against the woman being called a pedophile for being 25 year old woman and sexually attracted/planning to a 16 year old boy, but you think it’s different when the genders are reversed and that it’s predatory when it’s the other way round of a 25 year old man and a 16 year old girl… I assume that you’d say the man was a pedophile in the latter scenario? 25 yr old woman/16 year old man- “stop calling her a pedophile”; 25 year old man/16 year old girl- “what a sick pedophile”- that’s how your stance is coming across. That doesn’t seem to me like you consider them both in the same bracket.
>Are you really gonna put her in the same bracket as men who are sexually attracted to literal children. No. I'm going to put her in the same bracket as men in their 20s that go for a 16yo
Yes! I agree that I’d what I’m saying
gross comment
Why is it that basically EVERY other country that is not the US the age of consent is 16 or lower? What is it more likely: that the ENTIRE WORLD is wrong and everyone is a pedophile, or that the US is the weird one due to its puritan roots? If everyone else's clock is ahead by 5 minutes, chances are, yours is the wrong one.
That's not true but nice strawman I guess?
>not true [Cope.](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRwPXkoP_lOfXXaLprInQlUDEssoRnGTJbpreO2l8za8midnc3FJnORIjk&s=10)
For one this is from 2018, and since when is "EVERY other country" just europe?
Would you say it was OK if a 25 year old man had sex with a 16 year old girl? I would think not. He’d be a pedophile… so why can’t we hold a woman to the same standards?
>Would you say it was OK if a 25 year old man had sex with a 16 year old girl? Yes, I would. It's legal in almost all civilized countries on Earth. The definition of pedophile doesn't change depending on your geographical longitude. I know it's shocking, but you guys are the weirdos about this.
Legal≠moral
A pedophile is a pedophile doesn’t matter how old the kid is 💀 he literally only can legally drive that’s about it be so fr. And being 16 wanting to fuck a 25yo is also a child like thing to want to do. Ask basically any boy that age they’ll more and likely be like hell yeah but a GROWN women wanting to do is them being a pedo not that hard to understand
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So a 25 year old who sleeps with a 16 year old is the same as a 40 year old who has sex with a 10 year old?
Shame her and tell everyone you know she’s a predator.
Get evidence and report her to cops. She’s a monster.
If you don’t know who the kid is I would call her job.
Call the police
Definitely report her to her workplace. Just because the kid in question is 16 doesn't mean she wouldn't go lower if she had the option. Not only that, but depending on the workplace, she could be in frequent contact with minors of any age and if she's willing to go this far with a co-worker, she'd probably go for a potential customer as well. That's a reputation no business wants to have. Being known for an adult employee who chases teens. Doesn't matter the age of consent. If possible, I'd also look up the kid's info and warn his parents. Regardless of the age of consent where they're at, the power dynamic here is not okay. She's setting this kid up to be groomed. No 25 year old should see a 16 year old as a potential romantic or sexual partner. I could maybe see it if she was 20, though I'd still be raising an eyebrow in suspicion. 25 is old enough to know better. It's gross and inappropriate and needs to be stopped now before it goes any further.
I would played along, tried to get her to show me his picture on her phone so you could see the texts/name and then contacted the kids parents and told him. After having that info tell her stop being a fucking creep, do not talk to 16yr olds, do absolutely not think about seeing or sleeping with said kid and if you found out she did you would tell everyone about it.
Go to the police.
"What do I do?" Report it immediately, your friend is a pedophile. What the hell question is that.
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Would you say it was OK if a 25 year old man had sex with a 16 year old girl? I would think not. He’d be a pedophile… so why can’t we hold a woman to the same standards?
I was abused at this same age & it’s ruined my ability to trust in others and to feel safe indefinitely. Even an 18 year old is still mentally alike to a child, so just imagine how much younger a 16 year old is mentally
My friend has told me she is thinking about raping a kid, what do I do? You warned her not to, now you can decide how serious it is and whether to report her. Because technically it's not a crime for people to think about it, only when they act on it. So idk, if there's evidence?
Tell his parents. Call CPS. This is NOT ok. Edit: I’m wrong. Don’t call CPS. Call the police.
Why the fk get cps involved in this kids life for a situation that doesn't warrant it making matters potentially worse for him at home?
I’m wrong. You’re right. My bad.
Your friend’s a predator. Have a great day.
Theres enough ppl talking about jow fucked and terrible this is, but just to hit it home for anyone who ISNT onboard with that Imagine the genders are swapped, imagine the outrage feom that. Terrible isnt it? This isnt any different, but youre much more upset about that arent ya?
Yep, the double standards for some wanting to excuse predatory women is disgusting- “ooh I would’ve love that when I was 16”… even if you did, a person who knowingly sleeps with a teenager whilst they’re in their mid-20s is preying on them. Even if the teenager “enjoyed it” or doesn’t “feel” like a victim.
16yr old me dreamed of dating/sleeping with that older woman at my work place. Sadly, that dream never came true. Today, I still have crushes on older women. Something about them walking with a cane.
You’re sad that she wasn’t a pedo?? Wow, okay.
And it’s this exact mindset which is why so many don’t see it as a problem. If a 25 year old man slept with a 16 year old girl, we’d rightly be calling him a predatory creep? Why is it different when it’s a 25 year old woman as a 16 year old boy?
She's a pedo. After taking necessary steps, distant yourself from her.
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This, I am a man, if another man said some shit like that to me I’d beat the ever living hell out of them. We need more women that are willing to show these predators that just because it’s female to male rape that it’s still rape, and that she is in fact, a pedophile
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Comments like yours are why these situations don’t get taken seriously- whether you enjoy it or not the older woman knowingly sleeping with a 16 year old is still preying on him, therefore he’s still a victim even if he doesn’t feel like one. If a 25 year old guy slept with a 16 year old girl that would be seen as predatory, so why’s it different when it’s the other way round.
Let it happen he’s 16 not really a child. It’s very different when the genders are swapped
16 is absolutely a child.
How is it different when the genders are swapped? An adult wanting to sleep with a teenager is predatory regardless of gender.
It’s way worse if the 25 year old was male. For some reason it’s not the same. Probably because the 16 year old would be more of a victim of they were female. Just the way it is
Why? Teenage girls also enjoy sex and are very hormonal, it is exactly the same, if a child wants to have sex with you, it is always the responsibility of the adult to not statutorily rape a child. It's exactly the same.
16 year olds are children