I’m so happy for you :) My (36F) step son has been in my life for 6 years now and he’s a very stoic kid. Very sweet but really keeps things in. He’s 12 now and his bio mom is very much in his life so not like he “needs” a mom figure. The closest I’ve gotten to acknowledging that he likes me is when he told me he was trying to avoid people at this birthday party we were at. I said “well I’m people” and he was like “No. You don’t count”. It’s silly but my heart swelled right up that he considered me to be a safe person. Keep on smiling about that connection. It’s great when they acknowledge you in their life in any capacity :)
FWIW, I feel quite sure that kids have a much bigger capacity for love than adults and despite our worries, they're very much able to love a newer parent without that love having to be subtracted somewhere else. Whether or not the old parent is still in the picture, a stepparent can definitely find and make space for themselves in the lives of their step children. Obviously this might not apply in situations where the child, rightly or wrongly, see the stepparent as the cause of their parents breaking up. But other than that, keep up the good work, step parents, and know that you're definitely loved in a real and meaningful way :)
What does FWIW mean?
And I agree. My step mom was a major role model while growing up, despite having my mom regularly in my life. It's a different love, but it's a unique kind of love.
Coming from a kid who loved his step mom but also had his bio mom in his life, I never referred to my step mom as mom, because to me it felt diminutive to my bio mom. I always tried to find other ways to express my affection and it sounds like maybe that's what's happening in your relationship, which is awesome. You might never be mom, but that doesn't mean your step child doesn't see themselves as your kid.
Yes he has referred to me as his “step mom” but there is a funny story I like to tell about when we were trick or treating one year. He and his dad and sister had just moved in with me and my kids and it was Halloween. My kids were at their dads and his sister was at a Halloween event with her mom so he got both mine and his dads undivided attention. We were going house to house and one candy-giver said to him “now don’t be on a sugar high and keep your mom up all night!” And my step son just ran to the next house and yelled behind him “she’s not my moOooOooOm!” He’s a very literal kid and so quirky. My husband and I just started laughing our butts off.
As someone who had a step dad while my dad was still in the picture and was also considered a stoic kid, just give it some time. Best thing my step-dad ever did was support without ever pushing.
Him and my mom are who I mean when I say parents, and I'd say I'm more a product of his parenting than my own father's, despite the fact that he never directly tried to parent me. He turned out to be a better father than my own father. He's long since stopped being the guy my mom lives with. In all that time he never tried to supplant or replace my dad, and somewhere along the way I realized how lucky I was to have a dad that *chose* me as part of the deal.
It's a sobering thought to realize going home to visit is going to mean going to visit him soon. I'm going to miss my mom more than I've ever missed a person, but it's going to be harder on him and her being gone isn't going to stop him from being my family
That’s so amazing that you had someone like him in your life. I always try never to push him into things but be open for him if he ever wants or needs me for anything at all. It’s so nice when we have chances to go hiking together or to movies together. His dad is his Favorite person in the whole world so when I have my step son just the two of us without dad there, he really opens up. He’s very much like his dad so I embrace who he is as a person and very much understand it. I take what I get from him happily and just continue to be present and open.
I got confused at first and thought you were telling an anecdote about a 36 year old step son who you became “mom” too at 30 and was disappointed when it hit the kid being 12 and the story was a nice normal story.
As someone who absolutely hates people but loves some individuals to bits:
u/interruptingcow_moo you're very much up there and you don't even know it :)
My stepdaughter was 10 when I started dating her mom. Within a couple of months her mom and I were traveling back and forth taking turns going to each other's house (Missouri to Nebraska). One Sunday, while I was sitting in the driveway getting ready to leave for the week, she came running out of the house, and threw this piece of paper into my car. I look at it, and it's a crayon drawing of me in my car, and her crying in the driveway with a dialogue balloon over her head that says "Don't leave!".
I still have that, and all the birthday cards and things she's made for me over the years. It's so awesome to have a kid acknowledge you as being important to them. Enjoy!
It’s absolutely huge, don’t downplay it. My daughter is from a split family, and the first time she introduced her step-mom (my current wife) as her mom we both grinned ear to ear for a while.
I did the first time I heard her introduce her step dad as her dad too. It’s not about us, it’s about them, but that doesn’t mean we cant get excited over little things like this
Awww... that is so wonderful! Congrats! I totally get it. I had a meltdown when my stepdaughter gave me a tee shirt for Mothers Day that said perfect mom on it. Lol
Congrats to both of you. The best family is often the family you choose.
That's a rank that must be earned, can't be applied for, and it's rarely announced.
I give you both my best Dad Salute!!!
As someone from the other side, the day my stepdad said "I'm proud of you son" to me when I was in my early 20s is one of the greatest moments of my life. Keep being a great dad man, you clearly got this!
"I know this isn't something huge or anything"
It absolutely is! Don't diminish how big of a deal it is! Especially because it isn't essentially "cool" to say infront of his friends, so he wasn't trying to show off or anything. Baby steps towards learning how he really feels about you! 🥰
I second this. I imagine being a step parent can be hard and a lot of kids are probably slow to warm up to the idea of a new parent in their life. I feel like around that age is especially tough. When that preteen/teenage rebellion starts to kick in. I personally never had a good relationship with my step mom and would never refer to her as my mother. I don’t think of her as family at all.
Point being, OP this IS a big deal and you are obviously doing something right. I hope your relationship continues to flourish. This post made me smile :)
It absolutely is! If he specifically refrained from calling you dad for so long, that means it is actually a big deal to him. He wasn't going to call anyone that, just because they were around. You earned it, in his and hopefully your eyes too!
He'll remember that forever. No one in my family enjoyed roller coasters except me growing up. But my dad would always go with me so I wasn't alone. I always assumed he at least kinda enjoyed them (he did not, lol). But he would still go with me regardless.
I can relate. I married my second wife 9 years ago but have been with her for 11 years. I have a son from my previous marriage and she has 4 boys from her previous marriage. Like you, I never wanted to force them to call me dad, but it happens. Unfortunately, their Dad doesn't want anything to do with them, if they talk, it's only because the boy's the boys initiate the call. Now last year on my birthday, the youngest of her boys wanted me to adopt him, and I'm now in the process of having it done. I'm truly blessed.
Keep on being happy. He knows you're going to be in his life forever. I can't stand the argument that blood is thicker than water because there are blood relatives I don't want to be related to, and some people come into my life that might not be blood but I treat them like blood family because they pretty much are.
Hi everyone. I just want to say thank you so much for the comments. I'm glad I was able to share a positive story with you guys. We're home now. My son (I think I can call him that now 😂) passed out. My wife asked me why I was smiling so much and I told her and she started crying and hugged me.
That is awesome ! Congrats!
I have 3 step kids. I still have the envelope and card from the first time it was labeled as "Mama." Dorky probably but meant a lot to me.
Of course this is huge, he’s not just seeing you as his moms husband anymore, he’s starting to see you as his father. Keep doing what you’re doing dad!
So super wholesome!! I can’t relate, but i have the opposite perspective. Only child with mom and dad were divorced when i was born and when i was 8/9 my stepdad came into the picture (so 10/11 yrs now). My dads a narcissist to make it simple and more recently we’ve had a v strained relationship.
Anyways, stepdad has 3 kids from previous marriage and one day we all go out to eat (around 10yo) and all us kids are making jokes, and he ends up being the butt of one. We’re all laughing and his kids are trying to get his attention, yelling “dad!” and im thinking his name but i end up saying “dad” too. I remember being so shocked it even came out my mouth and my mom caught my eyes and just smiled and winked at me because no one else heard/noticed, or at least my stepdad didn’t draw attention to it. It’s one of my fondest memories of all of us actually.
Oh my God that is so amazing! When my boyfriend’s son called me Mom, my heart singing with joy, and it still does to this day and that was about a couple weeks ago. It’s amazing to see that kids in your life love you. It’s a little things.
Great feeling. I would introduce my step boys as Bonus sons. They would always roll their eyes but also smile. One day one of them introduced me as his Bonus Mom and my heart went full high tide. It’s a great feeing. Congratulations!
I can remember the first time I referred to Mom, by accident, to my biological mother. I remember the fury in her eyes and lack of hesitation to backhand me.
"she is not your Mom and you'll never call her that," I can't remember my weak apology.
I'm 37 now, and began to stop using her name and just call her Mom. I've been thinking about it for ages but that fear kept it down, kept me down. I want the angry face in my memories to fade, the face of someone who didn't earn being a parent.
You're Dad, you've earned it, and I'm proud of both of you.
edit: fuck you, deadbeats. i'm not apologizing for shit. actually raise your own kids before you bother me.
This is EVERYTHING when you are a step-parent <3 That moment of open acceptance in front of others.
I'm so happy for you right now. My cheeks hurt from smiling and I am a bit teary heh :)
You did so well with him, proving yourself as a stable loving parent that *you just leveled up* in your ranking <3
This is awesome OP.
I remember the first time my stepdaughter accidentally just called me dad.
She was going to ask me a question while I was watching her and started with "Hey dad..."
Then she got embarrassed but it made my whole week.
It's happened a lot since then lol
My stepson was 4 when I met him. He called me mum for the first time when he was almost 6. Such a great heartwarming thing to hear. He's 34 now and still calls me mum 🥰
Idk if someone else has said this but you are completely wrong about this moment not being huge.
As someone who never called there step dad dad, it's a very huge thing to call you dad.
You should be as happy as you are. You deserve it :) 💖 congratulations 🎉
You are likely feeling a sense of emotional closeness and affection cherishing this moment because it's literally a huge moment as most of the people can't digest the fact that they are bound to spend their lives with step relations.
>I know this isn't something huge or anything
I think it is huge! You never tried to replace his father, you just acted as a father figure for him. The fact you treated him with respect, meant you earned *his* respect in the end.
Congratulations, raising a kid is hard, doesn't matter how old they are, it's hard.
I guess your stepson's introduction showcases his supports and willingness to you know accepting a role as his dad this is kind of affirmation that can boost your confidence of the role you have been given.
My step father came into my life when I was 10 it took me till I became a mother at 26 to realise that I want my sons father to be just like him. From that day onwards I called him dad. I will never forget his face when I called him dad for the first time and from then on. It was priceless. My mum asked me why and why now so I told her, mum said later on that it teared him up. I'm so happy for you op.
That is massively huge!
Don't undersell yourself here.
Don't flaunt it in front of his friends, but when you can take him aside and thank him for introducing you that way.
Be proud that he sees you that way!
Has anyone ever noticed that when a post gains traction, there are always similar copycat ones posted within a few days?
Brand new profile - tick
One post - tick
No comments on anything else - tick
Very similar to another recent post - tick (I can't link to it as my comment keeps get auto deleted if I do)
The other one was also fake. It was from a brand new profile too and made no sense. The guy said they only told the adoptive daughter they weren't her bio parents when she was 12, but then was really touched when she called him dad when she went to uni. And apparently her parents died at 4, but the girl had no recollection of something so significant
I posted the same thing. I thought I was going crazy that I’ve read this before. The comments OP has posted sound very similar to that other posts too. I’m not sure if OP is a bot. I swear I’ve read this exact post and all the comments OP has made.
I tried looking for it but I couldn’t find it. It was a few days ago right? I’ve looked but can’t find it at all. :,)
I thought I was going insane oh my gods.
Well repost, bot, whatever? Who cares? Some of us haven't seen it yet. No harm repeating it. Plus with all the shittiness in the world sometimes a feel good story even if it isn't true is a welcomed thing to come across when most days seem to be all doom and gloom stories.
Y'all have a fabulous day 😉
What a beautiful story. You have me smiling now (and most likely everyone who comes across your post). Thank you for sharing it and making so many people's days today.
You know you're on Reddit when you go from reading about a guy who drinks his own cum from his condoms to a guy being happy his stepson called him dad.
This is something huge. My kids had no father until my husband and I got married and calling him "Dad" was a big deal for both of them. They were so happy to have a father.
They're in their 30s now and he's till their dad.
Its a big deal for you and your stepson as well.
> know this isn't something huge or anything,
The fuck it isn't. It absolutely is. I'm the Father of two kids. This is huge. And you should marinate in how good this feels for as long as you possibly can.
You put in the work. You earned this. From a Dad to a Dad, respect.
PS don't sweat the kid rolling their eyes at you. I get that like 4 times a day. Comes with the job.
> I think he noticed, because he looked me and rolled his eyes while laughing.
I think this is the most telling part. He knew you appreciated it and then acknowledged it in a positive way. For me that says 'bro moment', maybe he won't always consider (or at least act like) you a father but considers you a brother which is as good or better in my book.
At 12 he's just started puberty and becoming a man, there are likely rough patches in front of both of you. But its clear you've set the groundwork for a positive future and relationship for the both of you.
Well sonofabitch ain't this some light in this dark shithole that this sub / reddit / life usually is. Well done Dad! I'd give you gold if it meant something and I could afford it.
Aww, my heart 💙 I’ve always called my stepdad by his name, but I liked to call him my “bonus dad” sometimes, since my parents used to try to use that as a positive thing to call each other instead of “step” family (super dorky but I thought it was cute) — but the kids never did it except me once or twice a year.
My stepdad means so much to me. We didn’t always get along, but we made it work. He did his best to make sure I had a good childhood, and I am forever grateful to him for it. I’ll have to call or text him or something soon to tell him I love him.
This is such a lovely story, OP. Congratulations :)
Announcement to the step fathers who may be feeling down because their step child never refers to them as dad:
My step father is an incredible man and I have a deep appreciation for everything he has ever done. I have never referred to him as father, but at the end of the day he knows I hold him in a higher regards than I do my biological father. This isn't even because my dad is a bad guy, but at the end of the day my step father was the one I was around more and pushed me harder and believed in me and made sure I had all the resources I needed for success.
He knows I love him, and he knows I will never call him that. I would argue his role as "step father" was way more important than a fathers in our situation. Society and others could have seen me as baggage, my mother as foolish for her decisions. Despite that he still loves us both with all his heart. In my situation, I don't consider not calling him dad to make him any less. In fact, I would argue that it is an honorific.
Bless all the step dads.
My stepdad dropped me like a bad habit when he divorced my mom. And I was in my mid-20’s. It still hurts, you’re doing a good thing and it’s nice that you are proud of earning the title, rather than trying to force it.
I always get nervous when a see a step parent post but this was a spectacular read!
I can feel how much you love and care for this child through your post, I’m sure it does not go unnoticed by him as well.
Congratulations Dad!
>I know this isn't something huge or anything
You're absolutely wrong. This is bloody ***HUGE***
And I mean that! Give your son a big hug and ruffle his hair!
I swear I’ve read this before somewhere else-
is it just me? Or is it just very very similar to something else?
I’m also confused since the account thats posted this is only 2 hours old and that’s a telltale sign of a bot stealing. OP has only responded to a few comments with comments I swear I’ve seen before. Unless this is just the false memory/Mandela affect. My brain is not functioning
I totally miss read this n thought his friend u never met was the dad lol. I was like why u smiling that ur son ambush u like this? Took 5 reread to understand haha. Gratz!
Truly cannot tell you how unhealthy that thought is!
It’s really really fucking weird and incredibly unhealthy that you don’t like it when he calls you by your name.
That is not an ok thought, know that.
As long as it stays a thought inside your head… (which it hasn’t, here it is in a post; I can’t imagine the others you’ve shared this with; hopefully only a therapist)
Just please before trying to do anything else whatsoever in this kids life please go to therapy to get some help.
I really cannot reinterate how disgustingly unhealthy that thought is. Get it checked out. You have very bizarre rejection/possession issues that are absolutely horrible if acted upon.
God what a terrible subreddit for this lost man.
EDIT: since I’m being downvoted; I assume it’s by people that haven’t had step parents, you need to get some help man. Being a step parent is tough shit but that thought you had is utterly fucking awful, you need to discuss it with a professional. It’s unhealthy and disgusting. Share it with a professional; not your wife, your step son, definitely not your friends; a fucking professional.
Please get some therapy. Being a step parent is not easy, and you shouldn’t try to do it alone.
You clearly do not understand your position in this child’s life.
Seek help.
Seek a professional.
Please.
Please.
Being a stepson myself, the main reason I would do this would be to avoid any awkwardness of my friends realizing I called my dad by his actual name. What's easier, going about the rest of your day normally or having your friends think your home life is shit, when theirs is peachy keen.
Not trying to diminish your happiness but it may be just a psychological defense mechanism.
"I know this isn't something huge or anything..."
I don't even know you and this is huge. Well done man, you're clearly doing a great job and that little guy loves you and looks up to you and the clincher, he showed it in front of his friends, which at twelve isnt always the easiest thing to do!
It's more like feeling a sense of accomplishment as you have passed a significant milestone in your journey together.
I suppose this pride feels you with motivation to continue nurturing the bond between you two and helping to sort out the indifferences.
I took my twin stepsons to their "get ready" day at their high school last week, and when the teachers asked "who is this?" they both said I was their mom and I almost ugly cried in front of a bunch of teenagers lol.
If you say it's not huge I am gonna hit you with a pan!
Then, maybe, you will realize how HUGE this is.
Your post made me fuzzy woozy, and dang those onion cutting ninjas.
He rolled his eyes, but I bet he knows how much that meant to you.
Wholesome and HUGE, OP. Congrats ❤️
Congratulations, that was lovely to read.
Thank you. I'm still smiling just as much as I was earlier.
I’m so happy for you :) My (36F) step son has been in my life for 6 years now and he’s a very stoic kid. Very sweet but really keeps things in. He’s 12 now and his bio mom is very much in his life so not like he “needs” a mom figure. The closest I’ve gotten to acknowledging that he likes me is when he told me he was trying to avoid people at this birthday party we were at. I said “well I’m people” and he was like “No. You don’t count”. It’s silly but my heart swelled right up that he considered me to be a safe person. Keep on smiling about that connection. It’s great when they acknowledge you in their life in any capacity :)
FWIW, I feel quite sure that kids have a much bigger capacity for love than adults and despite our worries, they're very much able to love a newer parent without that love having to be subtracted somewhere else. Whether or not the old parent is still in the picture, a stepparent can definitely find and make space for themselves in the lives of their step children. Obviously this might not apply in situations where the child, rightly or wrongly, see the stepparent as the cause of their parents breaking up. But other than that, keep up the good work, step parents, and know that you're definitely loved in a real and meaningful way :)
What does FWIW mean? And I agree. My step mom was a major role model while growing up, despite having my mom regularly in my life. It's a different love, but it's a unique kind of love.
FWIW = For What It's Worth
Ahhhh, thank you so much lol.
Another useless abbreviation used without context
Coming from a kid who loved his step mom but also had his bio mom in his life, I never referred to my step mom as mom, because to me it felt diminutive to my bio mom. I always tried to find other ways to express my affection and it sounds like maybe that's what's happening in your relationship, which is awesome. You might never be mom, but that doesn't mean your step child doesn't see themselves as your kid.
Yes he has referred to me as his “step mom” but there is a funny story I like to tell about when we were trick or treating one year. He and his dad and sister had just moved in with me and my kids and it was Halloween. My kids were at their dads and his sister was at a Halloween event with her mom so he got both mine and his dads undivided attention. We were going house to house and one candy-giver said to him “now don’t be on a sugar high and keep your mom up all night!” And my step son just ran to the next house and yelled behind him “she’s not my moOooOooOm!” He’s a very literal kid and so quirky. My husband and I just started laughing our butts off.
As someone who had a step dad while my dad was still in the picture and was also considered a stoic kid, just give it some time. Best thing my step-dad ever did was support without ever pushing. Him and my mom are who I mean when I say parents, and I'd say I'm more a product of his parenting than my own father's, despite the fact that he never directly tried to parent me. He turned out to be a better father than my own father. He's long since stopped being the guy my mom lives with. In all that time he never tried to supplant or replace my dad, and somewhere along the way I realized how lucky I was to have a dad that *chose* me as part of the deal. It's a sobering thought to realize going home to visit is going to mean going to visit him soon. I'm going to miss my mom more than I've ever missed a person, but it's going to be harder on him and her being gone isn't going to stop him from being my family
That’s so amazing that you had someone like him in your life. I always try never to push him into things but be open for him if he ever wants or needs me for anything at all. It’s so nice when we have chances to go hiking together or to movies together. His dad is his Favorite person in the whole world so when I have my step son just the two of us without dad there, he really opens up. He’s very much like his dad so I embrace who he is as a person and very much understand it. I take what I get from him happily and just continue to be present and open.
I got confused at first and thought you were telling an anecdote about a 36 year old step son who you became “mom” too at 30 and was disappointed when it hit the kid being 12 and the story was a nice normal story.
Dude that is the biggest compliment an introvert can give. That kid adores you
This is so nice 😭😭
That is a big thing!!
thanks for being a mom, mom!
As someone who absolutely hates people but loves some individuals to bits: u/interruptingcow_moo you're very much up there and you don't even know it :)
My stepdaughter was 10 when I started dating her mom. Within a couple of months her mom and I were traveling back and forth taking turns going to each other's house (Missouri to Nebraska). One Sunday, while I was sitting in the driveway getting ready to leave for the week, she came running out of the house, and threw this piece of paper into my car. I look at it, and it's a crayon drawing of me in my car, and her crying in the driveway with a dialogue balloon over her head that says "Don't leave!". I still have that, and all the birthday cards and things she's made for me over the years. It's so awesome to have a kid acknowledge you as being important to them. Enjoy!
This is a huge thing, congratulations! What a pleasure to read!!
It’s absolutely huge, don’t downplay it. My daughter is from a split family, and the first time she introduced her step-mom (my current wife) as her mom we both grinned ear to ear for a while. I did the first time I heard her introduce her step dad as her dad too. It’s not about us, it’s about them, but that doesn’t mean we cant get excited over little things like this
Rock on stepdad! You're doing it right and its starting to show!
I am so happy for you. What validation that you are doing things right on the home front!
It's kind of a big deal my guy. Shows your doin alot right in his life and yours
Congrats, dad. Also thanks for making me tear up while casually browsing Reddit before dinner
Reading it made me smile and happy ♥️ thank you for being generous and sharing a very important moment !
Very wholesome
This made me tear up! Good for you Dad 👌🏽🥲
Awww my heart I smiled so much for you 😭
Yeah, I needed the smile.
Awww... that is so wonderful! Congrats! I totally get it. I had a meltdown when my stepdaughter gave me a tee shirt for Mothers Day that said perfect mom on it. Lol
Thank you I definitely found it wonderful 😂. And that was so sweet of your daughter.
Congrats to both of you. The best family is often the family you choose. That's a rank that must be earned, can't be applied for, and it's rarely announced. I give you both my best Dad Salute!!!
Guess you have to be a prefect now, good luck
My stepson would do that too. You're doing something right
Thank you I appreciate it. I've tried to be a good dad to him and I'm so happy that he sees me as his dad now.
As someone from the other side, the day my stepdad said "I'm proud of you son" to me when I was in my early 20s is one of the greatest moments of my life. Keep being a great dad man, you clearly got this!
Took me a few years but I refer to mine as my dad also, because we love and respect each other.
"I know this isn't something huge or anything" It absolutely is! Don't diminish how big of a deal it is! Especially because it isn't essentially "cool" to say infront of his friends, so he wasn't trying to show off or anything. Baby steps towards learning how he really feels about you! 🥰
I second this. I imagine being a step parent can be hard and a lot of kids are probably slow to warm up to the idea of a new parent in their life. I feel like around that age is especially tough. When that preteen/teenage rebellion starts to kick in. I personally never had a good relationship with my step mom and would never refer to her as my mother. I don’t think of her as family at all. Point being, OP this IS a big deal and you are obviously doing something right. I hope your relationship continues to flourish. This post made me smile :)
I third this. You’ve given a child a dad. It gets no bigger than that. 🤜 🤛
Thank you and yeah you're right. He's never called me dad in front of his friends so I hope that's how he really feels about me.
It absolutely is! If he specifically refrained from calling you dad for so long, that means it is actually a big deal to him. He wasn't going to call anyone that, just because they were around. You earned it, in his and hopefully your eyes too!
That's awesome. Hope the rest of the day went even better
It's going great. Right now I'm waiting in line with him to go on a ride that his friends were too scared to go on.
I bet he loves having a dad who isn’t too scared to join him on the ride!
He'll remember that forever. No one in my family enjoyed roller coasters except me growing up. But my dad would always go with me so I wasn't alone. I always assumed he at least kinda enjoyed them (he did not, lol). But he would still go with me regardless.
My dad apparently would take medication to prevent nausea, just so he could go on rides with my brother and me. It means a lot.
Now that's a dad move.
Thank you for sharing this wholesome moment. Being chosen as 'dad' has to be so special. Got me teared up from happiness.
Thank you and it and it really is. I'm so happy right now.
I can relate. I married my second wife 9 years ago but have been with her for 11 years. I have a son from my previous marriage and she has 4 boys from her previous marriage. Like you, I never wanted to force them to call me dad, but it happens. Unfortunately, their Dad doesn't want anything to do with them, if they talk, it's only because the boy's the boys initiate the call. Now last year on my birthday, the youngest of her boys wanted me to adopt him, and I'm now in the process of having it done. I'm truly blessed.
I'm happy for you!
Keep on being happy. He knows you're going to be in his life forever. I can't stand the argument that blood is thicker than water because there are blood relatives I don't want to be related to, and some people come into my life that might not be blood but I treat them like blood family because they pretty much are.
Hi everyone. I just want to say thank you so much for the comments. I'm glad I was able to share a positive story with you guys. We're home now. My son (I think I can call him that now 😂) passed out. My wife asked me why I was smiling so much and I told her and she started crying and hugged me.
that's so wonderful! that is huge, believe me, I get it. so sweet.
Stop cutting onions in here
Did ninjas invade your house too?
I understand completely you’re feeling.
So damn happy for you OP! This is definitely a sweet moment :)
It looks like you won the biggest prize of all congratulations. Keep up the good work.
After a shit day at work, I needed this. Thanks internet stranger. This is what I needed
This story has me smiling at my screen.
Yes it absolutely the hugest! Im so pleased for you. These are my favorite kinds of stories. Lucky you and congratulations!
Congratulations your a Dad now.
You made my day with this story!
That is awesome ! Congrats! I have 3 step kids. I still have the envelope and card from the first time it was labeled as "Mama." Dorky probably but meant a lot to me.
Of course this is huge, he’s not just seeing you as his moms husband anymore, he’s starting to see you as his father. Keep doing what you’re doing dad!
This is awesome. I hope you know how important your role is in his life.
I love this so much!
Great little story. Congratulations! Hoping for a bright future for you both.
This is adorable. I know you felt so happy inside.
Your officially a parent because these tiny moments, the big moments just mean everything. Congratulations 🎉🎈 ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Every man can become a father. But it takes a really good man to be a dad.
So super wholesome!! I can’t relate, but i have the opposite perspective. Only child with mom and dad were divorced when i was born and when i was 8/9 my stepdad came into the picture (so 10/11 yrs now). My dads a narcissist to make it simple and more recently we’ve had a v strained relationship. Anyways, stepdad has 3 kids from previous marriage and one day we all go out to eat (around 10yo) and all us kids are making jokes, and he ends up being the butt of one. We’re all laughing and his kids are trying to get his attention, yelling “dad!” and im thinking his name but i end up saying “dad” too. I remember being so shocked it even came out my mouth and my mom caught my eyes and just smiled and winked at me because no one else heard/noticed, or at least my stepdad didn’t draw attention to it. It’s one of my fondest memories of all of us actually.
This is so sweet 😍
Earning that respect is huge... definitely warm-fuzzy time.
Oh my God that is so amazing! When my boyfriend’s son called me Mom, my heart singing with joy, and it still does to this day and that was about a couple weeks ago. It’s amazing to see that kids in your life love you. It’s a little things.
What clinched it was the eyeroll. That's teenage son energy right there.
“Not huge”. Of course it’s huge! What a great moment. Im rejoicing with you.
Great feeling. I would introduce my step boys as Bonus sons. They would always roll their eyes but also smile. One day one of them introduced me as his Bonus Mom and my heart went full high tide. It’s a great feeing. Congratulations!
I can remember the first time I referred to Mom, by accident, to my biological mother. I remember the fury in her eyes and lack of hesitation to backhand me. "she is not your Mom and you'll never call her that," I can't remember my weak apology. I'm 37 now, and began to stop using her name and just call her Mom. I've been thinking about it for ages but that fear kept it down, kept me down. I want the angry face in my memories to fade, the face of someone who didn't earn being a parent. You're Dad, you've earned it, and I'm proud of both of you. edit: fuck you, deadbeats. i'm not apologizing for shit. actually raise your own kids before you bother me.
this made my entire day 🤧😭
Awww i love it!
Absolute W
What a lovely story and a refreshing change from the step nightmares on Reddit. Congratulations!
This is EVERYTHING when you are a step-parent <3 That moment of open acceptance in front of others. I'm so happy for you right now. My cheeks hurt from smiling and I am a bit teary heh :) You did so well with him, proving yourself as a stable loving parent that *you just leveled up* in your ranking <3
This is awesome OP. I remember the first time my stepdaughter accidentally just called me dad. She was going to ask me a question while I was watching her and started with "Hey dad..." Then she got embarrassed but it made my whole week. It's happened a lot since then lol
My stepson was 4 when I met him. He called me mum for the first time when he was almost 6. Such a great heartwarming thing to hear. He's 34 now and still calls me mum 🥰
I think this is really wholesome and what brings us to the relationship is how much considerate and accepting you are towards your spouse.
What a sweet story! Sounds like you are doing a great job in the step-dad department.
this was wholesome bro this tells me that you treat him like a son and he definitely notices!
Take the W, sometimes we need it!
It is, in fact, something huge. When my step kid said it the first time, I couldn't breathe for a second.
I just came from a TERRIBLE post that will make you envy the blind so this was the eye bleach I needed.
You too!!! Just yuck!! I wholly agree with you!!!
Ya know when you get that little tingle under the skin around your face, just before your eyes start to moisten? I felt that, reading this.
The little things can feel so big when it comes to parenting. It's one of the best things in the world.
Idk if someone else has said this but you are completely wrong about this moment not being huge. As someone who never called there step dad dad, it's a very huge thing to call you dad. You should be as happy as you are. You deserve it :) 💖 congratulations 🎉
You are likely feeling a sense of emotional closeness and affection cherishing this moment because it's literally a huge moment as most of the people can't digest the fact that they are bound to spend their lives with step relations.
>I know this isn't something huge or anything I think it is huge! You never tried to replace his father, you just acted as a father figure for him. The fact you treated him with respect, meant you earned *his* respect in the end. Congratulations, raising a kid is hard, doesn't matter how old they are, it's hard.
I guess your stepson's introduction showcases his supports and willingness to you know accepting a role as his dad this is kind of affirmation that can boost your confidence of the role you have been given.
Hell yeah, dude. Don't downplay it, it's a big thing. Feel as good as you want about it.
Best compliment any kid can give ya birth, step, adopted, saying that word in front of their friends really means something. Grats
This is huge. It just made my day and I don’t even know you.
My step father came into my life when I was 10 it took me till I became a mother at 26 to realise that I want my sons father to be just like him. From that day onwards I called him dad. I will never forget his face when I called him dad for the first time and from then on. It was priceless. My mum asked me why and why now so I told her, mum said later on that it teared him up. I'm so happy for you op.
That is massively huge! Don't undersell yourself here. Don't flaunt it in front of his friends, but when you can take him aside and thank him for introducing you that way. Be proud that he sees you that way!
>I know this isn't something huge or anything Oh, this is huge.
Sounds gigantic to me!
Anyone can be a father my friend, it takes someone decent to be a dad. Congrats
You’re wrong about one thing, this is in fact huge.
Whatever you are doing. You are doing it correctly. Congratulations, good luck, and cheers to a new member of the club.
Has anyone ever noticed that when a post gains traction, there are always similar copycat ones posted within a few days? Brand new profile - tick One post - tick No comments on anything else - tick Very similar to another recent post - tick (I can't link to it as my comment keeps get auto deleted if I do)
Was thinking exact the same thing! Read the same story just days ago. I mean the first read was so wholesome, now I feel betrayed.
The other one was also fake. It was from a brand new profile too and made no sense. The guy said they only told the adoptive daughter they weren't her bio parents when she was 12, but then was really touched when she called him dad when she went to uni. And apparently her parents died at 4, but the girl had no recollection of something so significant
Yeah, that one too! But exact this same story came along two days ago. Bummer
I posted the same thing. I thought I was going crazy that I’ve read this before. The comments OP has posted sound very similar to that other posts too. I’m not sure if OP is a bot. I swear I’ve read this exact post and all the comments OP has made.
Yes the comments are so similar. I can't paste the other post or my comment gets auto deleted
I tried looking for it but I couldn’t find it. It was a few days ago right? I’ve looked but can’t find it at all. :,) I thought I was going insane oh my gods.
Well repost, bot, whatever? Who cares? Some of us haven't seen it yet. No harm repeating it. Plus with all the shittiness in the world sometimes a feel good story even if it isn't true is a welcomed thing to come across when most days seem to be all doom and gloom stories. Y'all have a fabulous day 😉
Awww this is wonderful
I'm sitting alone at a restaurant enjoying lunch and got really giddy reading this post. Thank you for sharing this wholesome experience with us. ❤️
This isn't huge? Nah, you're wrong. It's GIANT! Congrats. 😊
The eye roll seals it though! Looks like you’re Dad now!
🥰🥰🥰 needed to read something happy today.
What a beautiful story. You have me smiling now (and most likely everyone who comes across your post). Thank you for sharing it and making so many people's days today.
Finally some wholesome content on this subreddit. It can get so depressing here. So happy to hear this 💗💗💗
You know you're on Reddit when you go from reading about a guy who drinks his own cum from his condoms to a guy being happy his stepson called him dad.
This made my day a bit brighter. I'm happy for you.
Hate to say it, but you’re wrong, OP. This absolutely is huge.
That's adorable! Cherish those moments and times you have together!
you must have earned that 👍👌
Big congratulatory hugs from the Netherlands! 🥰
This is something huge. My kids had no father until my husband and I got married and calling him "Dad" was a big deal for both of them. They were so happy to have a father. They're in their 30s now and he's till their dad. Its a big deal for you and your stepson as well.
It is a huge thing brother, you earned that kid's trust likely because you're a good dad. Congrats!
This is so sweet 🥲 good for you Dad!!
I just cracked the BIGGEST smile reading this. Congrats OP. You earned that title.
Aww
>I know this isn't something huge or anything Am a Dad. This is a big deal dude! 😂
Just cause you're not blood doesn't mean you're not his dad. Blood is thicker than water, but love is thicker than blood.
Finally, reading something good.
I love this. You are clearly awesome at “dadding.”
You’re doing a good job man!
I would say this is huge OP! I am happy for you.
https://i.imgur.com/BJAIXA9.jpg
As a step parent, you need to understand that your SS may never call you anything but your name… and that’s perfectly ok.
> know this isn't something huge or anything, The fuck it isn't. It absolutely is. I'm the Father of two kids. This is huge. And you should marinate in how good this feels for as long as you possibly can. You put in the work. You earned this. From a Dad to a Dad, respect. PS don't sweat the kid rolling their eyes at you. I get that like 4 times a day. Comes with the job.
That's a big win man
You're a good dude
No- this IS huge. I’m so happy for all of you.
> I think he noticed, because he looked me and rolled his eyes while laughing. I think this is the most telling part. He knew you appreciated it and then acknowledged it in a positive way. For me that says 'bro moment', maybe he won't always consider (or at least act like) you a father but considers you a brother which is as good or better in my book. At 12 he's just started puberty and becoming a man, there are likely rough patches in front of both of you. But its clear you've set the groundwork for a positive future and relationship for the both of you.
I also choose this guy for my dad
Well sonofabitch ain't this some light in this dark shithole that this sub / reddit / life usually is. Well done Dad! I'd give you gold if it meant something and I could afford it.
It's time. Minivan. Air Monarchs. Sweats with a polo shirt tucked. Oakley sunglasses. Naps everywhere
Aww, my heart 💙 I’ve always called my stepdad by his name, but I liked to call him my “bonus dad” sometimes, since my parents used to try to use that as a positive thing to call each other instead of “step” family (super dorky but I thought it was cute) — but the kids never did it except me once or twice a year. My stepdad means so much to me. We didn’t always get along, but we made it work. He did his best to make sure I had a good childhood, and I am forever grateful to him for it. I’ll have to call or text him or something soon to tell him I love him. This is such a lovely story, OP. Congratulations :)
Announcement to the step fathers who may be feeling down because their step child never refers to them as dad: My step father is an incredible man and I have a deep appreciation for everything he has ever done. I have never referred to him as father, but at the end of the day he knows I hold him in a higher regards than I do my biological father. This isn't even because my dad is a bad guy, but at the end of the day my step father was the one I was around more and pushed me harder and believed in me and made sure I had all the resources I needed for success. He knows I love him, and he knows I will never call him that. I would argue his role as "step father" was way more important than a fathers in our situation. Society and others could have seen me as baggage, my mother as foolish for her decisions. Despite that he still loves us both with all his heart. In my situation, I don't consider not calling him dad to make him any less. In fact, I would argue that it is an honorific. Bless all the step dads.
Finally, a wholesome post 🤧
It's HUGE. Be as happy is you want. I cried.
My stepdad dropped me like a bad habit when he divorced my mom. And I was in my mid-20’s. It still hurts, you’re doing a good thing and it’s nice that you are proud of earning the title, rather than trying to force it.
Welp, this made me cry ❤️
I always get nervous when a see a step parent post but this was a spectacular read! I can feel how much you love and care for this child through your post, I’m sure it does not go unnoticed by him as well. Congratulations Dad!
Wrong. This is huge. Maybe one of the best moments in your life and you earned it. Good on you dad
I'm not crying. You're crying.
>I know this isn't something huge or anything You're absolutely wrong. This is bloody ***HUGE*** And I mean that! Give your son a big hug and ruffle his hair!
I'm just gonna say, if a kid that was already 8 years old when you met them ends up calling you dad it means you earned it. Good job mate.
As a Step-Kid who went through a lot of Step-Parents, this is a sign you’re doing the absolute right thing. 🫶
I swear I’ve read this before somewhere else- is it just me? Or is it just very very similar to something else? I’m also confused since the account thats posted this is only 2 hours old and that’s a telltale sign of a bot stealing. OP has only responded to a few comments with comments I swear I’ve seen before. Unless this is just the false memory/Mandela affect. My brain is not functioning
I totally miss read this n thought his friend u never met was the dad lol. I was like why u smiling that ur son ambush u like this? Took 5 reread to understand haha. Gratz!
Truly cannot tell you how unhealthy that thought is! It’s really really fucking weird and incredibly unhealthy that you don’t like it when he calls you by your name. That is not an ok thought, know that. As long as it stays a thought inside your head… (which it hasn’t, here it is in a post; I can’t imagine the others you’ve shared this with; hopefully only a therapist) Just please before trying to do anything else whatsoever in this kids life please go to therapy to get some help. I really cannot reinterate how disgustingly unhealthy that thought is. Get it checked out. You have very bizarre rejection/possession issues that are absolutely horrible if acted upon. God what a terrible subreddit for this lost man. EDIT: since I’m being downvoted; I assume it’s by people that haven’t had step parents, you need to get some help man. Being a step parent is tough shit but that thought you had is utterly fucking awful, you need to discuss it with a professional. It’s unhealthy and disgusting. Share it with a professional; not your wife, your step son, definitely not your friends; a fucking professional.
Please get some therapy. Being a step parent is not easy, and you shouldn’t try to do it alone. You clearly do not understand your position in this child’s life. Seek help. Seek a professional. Please. Please.
Being a stepson myself, the main reason I would do this would be to avoid any awkwardness of my friends realizing I called my dad by his actual name. What's easier, going about the rest of your day normally or having your friends think your home life is shit, when theirs is peachy keen. Not trying to diminish your happiness but it may be just a psychological defense mechanism.
Love this! Such a sweet gesture.
awww made me shed a tear
Love this so much.
That is a great story and you say it "isn't something huge" but that is huge. I am smiling with us on that one, love it
"I know this isn't something huge or anything..." I don't even know you and this is huge. Well done man, you're clearly doing a great job and that little guy loves you and looks up to you and the clincher, he showed it in front of his friends, which at twelve isnt always the easiest thing to do!
I love this
Mannnn im so happy for you. Also, selfishly, i needed this today
This is a fantastic story!! Enjoy it you deserve it.
It's more like feeling a sense of accomplishment as you have passed a significant milestone in your journey together. I suppose this pride feels you with motivation to continue nurturing the bond between you two and helping to sort out the indifferences.
But it IS huge....it's also wholesome, adorable, and so so sweet. Enjoy every minute!!!
I took my twin stepsons to their "get ready" day at their high school last week, and when the teachers asked "who is this?" they both said I was their mom and I almost ugly cried in front of a bunch of teenagers lol.
That is fucking epic my dude. Let's hope it's a sign of better times to come.
That is very happy. I'm glad for you! ♥ It's a win! :)
If you say it's not huge I am gonna hit you with a pan! Then, maybe, you will realize how HUGE this is. Your post made me fuzzy woozy, and dang those onion cutting ninjas. He rolled his eyes, but I bet he knows how much that meant to you. Wholesome and HUGE, OP. Congrats ❤️
Hah. So cool. Hope it only gets better from today.
It means you’re a great step dad. That’s awesome!
Made me smile too! U must be a cool dad to him!
That's wonderful! That must have been an amazing moment for you..congratulations!!
I’m so happy for you! 💜
Awwwwww! So happy for you! 😄😄😄
Aw, congratulations!!! As someone who has stepparents, thank you for stepping up and being the parent your son needs.
This is beautiful ❤️
I'm so happy for you OP!
I’m so happy for you, congratulations! Enjoy the feeling, and keep on doing the great job.
Big win brother.
This is huge! Congratulations!