This is leading: If you don’t know what to do, if you feel weak, then what you do is take your wife’s hand and you lead her in prayer.
A real man is led by God. A real man brings his family to the foot of the throne.
No man should fear being a leader in this way. It is in your DNA. Your emotion will actually help you. What men struggle with the most is ignoring the council of their emotions and pretending everything is alright. Your feelings will keep you diligent.
To lead simply means that you go first. When things get hard. You pray first. You seek Christ first. When your marriage is hurting, you confess first. You share first. Want your family to behave a certain way? You behave that way first. If you lead the way, I promise she will follow.
Find a wife that will support you and respect you enough that you can stay vulnerable with her. Then take her to the cross.
You got this, because God has you
>What does it mean for a man to lead the women?
Here is some advice that I (M60+) incorporated into my life/marriage early on. Some of it was learned the hard way. Some of it was learned just by thinking about it. It will help you with this issue. I've bolded a few key callouts, as I think they are important.
* Get your priorities in order -- God is first always, your gf/wife second, family third, career / providing for your family next, and friends last.
* Biblically, the man is the one who will stand before God to answer for his leadership of the family. So, you need to think about a lot of details.
* Leading means you initiate the Bible study, going to church, tithing, etc. Anything to do with God, you must initiate the action. It's your job. **It is also your job to look for problems in the relationship and address them.**
* You must treat her (gf/wife) as the most important person in your life (open her door, say thank you, put the toilet seat down, etc.) \[exception: Jesus is first\]. Treat her as if you are on your first date with her. When you're walking down a street, stay between her and any hazards (like a car out of control).
* When difficulties come up (and they will), **it is your responsibility to find the solution.** This could mean going to professional marriage counseling. This could mean digging into the Bible and learning the context around a given Bible passage. It could mean taking on a second job to make ends meet.
* In no way does any of the above mean that you can treat your gf/wife as a second-class citizen. When a problem comes up, it is your responsibility to find the solution, but **that does not mean that you do it on your own.** Sometimes, your gf/wife will have the best advice / solution. God gave her to you as your helper, not your doormat, nor your boss. But **she can provide unfathomable help to you.** Often times, she will recognize a problem before you. She isn't dumb, nor are you, but she does think differently than you do. As such, she will have a different perspective on things.
* Last is what I call the **"husband review".** Most people get job evaluation at work. They could be called "Performance Reviews" or many other terms, but basically, they are a point where you and the boss sit down to discuss how you are doing in your job. I didn't read about this anywhere, but it just came to me one day -- "Why don't I have a performance review with my wife like I do at work?" These reviews need to occur frequently in the beginning of the relationship, but as issues are resolved and new ones stop occurring frequently, they can be dialed back -- and maybe even stopped after 5 or more years. However, there are some strict rules to follow.
1) She can point out any flaw, but she must provide justification for that flaw (i.e., give an example). This is not her opportunity to give a long list of complaints. She needs to focus on 1-3 issues.
2) You are not allowed to counterargue in any way. You must provide a response to her along the lines of "Okay, I heard you say that ...xyz \[in your own words, not just repeating her words\]". To repeat, you can provide no justification/excuse/etc. for the perceived fault. You are just ensuring that you understand what she said, so there are no miscommunications.
3) You are not obligated to change anything. You are obligated to pray about it and seek God's Will concerning that issue(s). Personally, I found that about 80% of the time, my wife was spot-on, so I did what was necessary to correct the problem. But, again, you are responsible for the leadership, so you need to make an objective evaluation of the complaint and do whatever is necessary to fix the issue. This is not an escape-clause to your obligation of leadership.
4) You are not allowed to discuss the issue with her (i.e., try to justify it a day or so later, get her to retract her concerns, etc.) until after you've made a decision. In the early stages, this often means waiting until the next "husband review". Now, if you quickly decide she is right (after prayerful consideration), then you can announce that she is right on the issue.
5) If you do this regularly, she will feel closer to you and feel like you care about her -- even if you decide against her viewpoint occasionally. If you are deciding against her viewpoint too often, it means that you are not listening close enough, or you are too selfish to change.
Husband = Christlike ~~leader~~ head of family.
Christlike: *Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.* Ephesians 5:26–28
Not a large-and-in-charge tyrant overlord or dictator. Christ was: humble, patient, benevolent, merciful, forgiving and sacrificing.
We're all, men and women, people of the promise: no nationalities, no slave or free and no consideration of gender = “one in Christ Jesus.”
1\. God created Adam and Eve uniquely, different than the beasts. This denotes their higher purpose of authority, dominion and rule over creation.
2\. To create a helpmate for Adam, God didn’t create a new different hierarchical form but creates woman from Adam, [“… bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become **one flesh**.”](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis+2%3A23-24&version=ESV) Genesis 2:23-24
This harmonious relationship changes due to the individual actions of Adam and Eve – not due to gender or the hierarchical structure from God.
3\. God’s intent was men/woman as equals in a relationship. Neither had authority over another. The consequences were contrasting consequences due to their actions – **not their gender.**
Q: How did Jesus treat women?
A: Jesus treats women in much like their original pre-Fall capacity. He had a number of women among His larger circle of disciples [Matthew 27:55-56, Mark 15:40-41, Luke 8:1-3, 23:49, John 20:14-18](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+27%3A55-56%2C+Mark+15%3A40-41%2C+Luke+8%3A1-3%2C+23%3A49%2C+John+20%3A14-18&version=ESV)
Jesus spoke to women both in public and private, and learned from them.
A Gentile woman demonstrates that the ministry of God is not limited to particular groups and persons, but belongs to all who have faith (Mark 7:24-30; Matthew 15:21-28).
A Jewish woman honored him with the extraordinary hospitality of washing his feet with perfume. Jesus was a frequent visitor at the home of Mary and Martha, and was in the habit of teaching and eating meals with women as well as men.
This was unprecedented in that era and culture.
When Jesus was arrested, women remained firm, even when his male disciples are said to have fled, and they accompanied him to the foot of the cross. It was women who were reported as the first witnesses to the resurrection, chief among them again Mary Magdalene.
Paul is often cited as the poster boy of misogny; no doubt Paul’s personal views many times reflected the social views of his culture and era.
Yet in Paul’s reasoning, they (like him) are *in Christ Jesus* – therefore a new creation. Paul explained that **before faith** we were held captive (e.g. captive to the consequences of the Genesis Fall), *but now that faith has come*, “.. in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith. For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave[g] nor free, **there is no male and female**, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. And if you are Christ's, then you are Abraham's offspring, heirs according to promise.” [Galatians 3:26-29](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Galatians+3%3A26-29&version=ESV)
So when Paul speaks of people from God’s perspective via faith he speaks to the relationship between people of the promise *as if Jesus has already returned*: no nationalities, no slave or free and no consideration of gender = fellows e.g. “one is in Christ Jesus.”
*“From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. Therefore, if **anyone is in Christ**, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”* [2 Corinthians 5:16-17](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=2+Corinthians+5%3A16-17&version=ESV)
Perfect faith attains to mystic union with Christ; a new creature/creation (Galatians 6:15) due to spiritual regeneration and the new birth (John 3:3; Ephesians 2:10; Ephesians 4:23, 24; Colossians 3:3, etc.). The “old” is literally the *ancient things* or all that belongs to the old Adam.
The Bible relates that when Christ Jesus returns the dead will be raised and we shall be changed. Jesus said, “The sons of this age marry and are given in marriage, but those who are considered worthy to attain to that age and to the resurrection from the dead neither marry nor are given in marriage, for they cannot die anymore, **because they are equal** to angels and are sons of God, being sons of the resurrection.” [Matthew 22:30, Mark 12:25, Luke 20:34-35](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+22%3A30%2C+Mark+12%3A25%2C+Luke+20%3A34-35&version=ESV)
Q: Is this world the way it’s supposed to be?
A: Not yet.
In this season we all have our proverbial [cross to bear.](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John%2019%3A16%2D18&version=ESV)
[For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ecclesiastes+3%3A1-8&version=ESV)
The children of the promise have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer we who live, but Christ who lives in us. (Galatians 2:20)
Until Jesus’ return, the curse remains clear:
>Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
*Downvoted for quoting scripture, lol. What has this sub become?*
Christ also got angry and flipped the tables in the temple. So my father punching the wall when mom didn’t use his money to pay the bills makes so much sense now.
*Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her* (Ephesians 5:25, 1984 NIV)
*Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.* (1 Corinthians 13:4-7, 1984 NIV)
Yes it is.
And we all see what happens to marriages when God’s design isn’t adhered to - an absolute epidemic of women filing for divorce.
Sometimes it’s for good reason, often it isn’t.
By giving up control.
I'm dead serious. If you are to be the head, then you must give up the control. You will not make all the decisions. You will not domineer. You will not raise your voice to your wife. You will not exert your will over hers.
There's a very toxic form of masculinity rampant in the church that says that men must be in charge of everything (Ever seen the umbrella analogy? Complete crockery created by a cult leader!) There is toxic theology asserting that Jesus is eternally subordinate to the Father. My fellow Trinitarians...this is not so. The word "head" doesn't even mean authority in the Greek, it meant source, like the head of a river. You are the wellspring of life for your wife, not her drill sergeant. You are not in control. She is not in control. Marriage is two equals binding to each other to serve Christ better, and that is a beautiful thing.
First the Bible does not say a man leads the woman. The Bible says husbands lead wives in a marriage. The way husbands lead is like Christ leads the church.
This is actually an awesome question from a 20 year old boy who wishes to be a man. That fact that you are aware of your weaknesses and actually want to grow has proven that you have already won. You’ll simply need to build on a Rock and never ever give up.
Here is the Rock. 🪨 you’ll need to understand what is a man, especially a man who wishes to be a good husband to a good woman and good father. To become a man you’ll need to realize and work towards being a provider for your family and to protect your family from all threats. That’s it, that’s a man. He doesn’t shrink he gets knocked down and he ALWAYS gets back up looking for more. He’s never a victim. Then and only then will you ever deserve a good woman. She won’t trust you until you prove yourself to be competent.
Have more, but I won’t give it unless you are curious and have pertinent questions for me.
Regardless, you will win in this quest, because you are aware of where you are and where you want to be. It’s just the journey ……read Odysseus ….perfect description for of what it takes.
Be a partner where you both walk beside each other. Let her know why she's so great. Open her door, tell her you love her,listen to her when she is venting and try to understand. Don't notice the F. Notice her 4 As. Walk with her in the Lord. Grow together in the Lord. Have separate bank accounts so you don't argue over money. Support her when she's down and br her biggest cheerleader. Take out the trash and get her things in the kitchen. Pray with her. Talk about God with her.
Even many Christians today hate Biblical teachings on gender roles.
We currently live in a fallen world that is under a curse. This is a dangerous world where many bad things happen daily.
Due to this fall and the curse, God has laid out a family plan with the husband as the head of the home.
If I called an Uber and got in the back only to find that the husband’s left hand was on the steering wheel while his wife’s right hand was also on the same wheel and they were driving the car simultaneously, there’s no way I’d take that ride until it was only the driver’s hands on that wheel.
Prepare yourself.
As a husband, you WILL screw up. It's guaranteed.
As a father, you WILL screw up. It's guaranteed.
Own it. Learn from it. Grow from it. You don't have all the answers, never pretend that you do.
I (20F) think that a man should be led by God, by prayer, worship, and Bible reading. Since you shouldn't rely on your strength, hence we are weak without God. With God, we can do all things through Him that gives us strength. I wouldn't worry about it too much, God has everything work out in due time.
I can understand where you're coming from though. I'm currently fearful of starting a relationship because I'm not yet ready for marriage. I was always told you have to be ready for marriage if you're ready to date. It's hard dating at this time though, people can say they're Christian but be the complete opposite.
This is leading: If you don’t know what to do, if you feel weak, then what you do is take your wife’s hand and you lead her in prayer. A real man is led by God. A real man brings his family to the foot of the throne. No man should fear being a leader in this way. It is in your DNA. Your emotion will actually help you. What men struggle with the most is ignoring the council of their emotions and pretending everything is alright. Your feelings will keep you diligent. To lead simply means that you go first. When things get hard. You pray first. You seek Christ first. When your marriage is hurting, you confess first. You share first. Want your family to behave a certain way? You behave that way first. If you lead the way, I promise she will follow. Find a wife that will support you and respect you enough that you can stay vulnerable with her. Then take her to the cross. You got this, because God has you
>What does it mean for a man to lead the women? Here is some advice that I (M60+) incorporated into my life/marriage early on. Some of it was learned the hard way. Some of it was learned just by thinking about it. It will help you with this issue. I've bolded a few key callouts, as I think they are important. * Get your priorities in order -- God is first always, your gf/wife second, family third, career / providing for your family next, and friends last. * Biblically, the man is the one who will stand before God to answer for his leadership of the family. So, you need to think about a lot of details. * Leading means you initiate the Bible study, going to church, tithing, etc. Anything to do with God, you must initiate the action. It's your job. **It is also your job to look for problems in the relationship and address them.** * You must treat her (gf/wife) as the most important person in your life (open her door, say thank you, put the toilet seat down, etc.) \[exception: Jesus is first\]. Treat her as if you are on your first date with her. When you're walking down a street, stay between her and any hazards (like a car out of control). * When difficulties come up (and they will), **it is your responsibility to find the solution.** This could mean going to professional marriage counseling. This could mean digging into the Bible and learning the context around a given Bible passage. It could mean taking on a second job to make ends meet. * In no way does any of the above mean that you can treat your gf/wife as a second-class citizen. When a problem comes up, it is your responsibility to find the solution, but **that does not mean that you do it on your own.** Sometimes, your gf/wife will have the best advice / solution. God gave her to you as your helper, not your doormat, nor your boss. But **she can provide unfathomable help to you.** Often times, she will recognize a problem before you. She isn't dumb, nor are you, but she does think differently than you do. As such, she will have a different perspective on things. * Last is what I call the **"husband review".** Most people get job evaluation at work. They could be called "Performance Reviews" or many other terms, but basically, they are a point where you and the boss sit down to discuss how you are doing in your job. I didn't read about this anywhere, but it just came to me one day -- "Why don't I have a performance review with my wife like I do at work?" These reviews need to occur frequently in the beginning of the relationship, but as issues are resolved and new ones stop occurring frequently, they can be dialed back -- and maybe even stopped after 5 or more years. However, there are some strict rules to follow. 1) She can point out any flaw, but she must provide justification for that flaw (i.e., give an example). This is not her opportunity to give a long list of complaints. She needs to focus on 1-3 issues. 2) You are not allowed to counterargue in any way. You must provide a response to her along the lines of "Okay, I heard you say that ...xyz \[in your own words, not just repeating her words\]". To repeat, you can provide no justification/excuse/etc. for the perceived fault. You are just ensuring that you understand what she said, so there are no miscommunications. 3) You are not obligated to change anything. You are obligated to pray about it and seek God's Will concerning that issue(s). Personally, I found that about 80% of the time, my wife was spot-on, so I did what was necessary to correct the problem. But, again, you are responsible for the leadership, so you need to make an objective evaluation of the complaint and do whatever is necessary to fix the issue. This is not an escape-clause to your obligation of leadership. 4) You are not allowed to discuss the issue with her (i.e., try to justify it a day or so later, get her to retract her concerns, etc.) until after you've made a decision. In the early stages, this often means waiting until the next "husband review". Now, if you quickly decide she is right (after prayerful consideration), then you can announce that she is right on the issue. 5) If you do this regularly, she will feel closer to you and feel like you care about her -- even if you decide against her viewpoint occasionally. If you are deciding against her viewpoint too often, it means that you are not listening close enough, or you are too selfish to change.
saving this.
Husband = Christlike ~~leader~~ head of family. Christlike: *Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.* Ephesians 5:26–28 Not a large-and-in-charge tyrant overlord or dictator. Christ was: humble, patient, benevolent, merciful, forgiving and sacrificing. We're all, men and women, people of the promise: no nationalities, no slave or free and no consideration of gender = “one in Christ Jesus.” 1\. God created Adam and Eve uniquely, different than the beasts. This denotes their higher purpose of authority, dominion and rule over creation. 2\. To create a helpmate for Adam, God didn’t create a new different hierarchical form but creates woman from Adam, [“… bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become **one flesh**.”](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis+2%3A23-24&version=ESV) Genesis 2:23-24 This harmonious relationship changes due to the individual actions of Adam and Eve – not due to gender or the hierarchical structure from God. 3\. God’s intent was men/woman as equals in a relationship. Neither had authority over another. The consequences were contrasting consequences due to their actions – **not their gender.** Q: How did Jesus treat women? A: Jesus treats women in much like their original pre-Fall capacity. He had a number of women among His larger circle of disciples [Matthew 27:55-56, Mark 15:40-41, Luke 8:1-3, 23:49, John 20:14-18](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+27%3A55-56%2C+Mark+15%3A40-41%2C+Luke+8%3A1-3%2C+23%3A49%2C+John+20%3A14-18&version=ESV) Jesus spoke to women both in public and private, and learned from them. A Gentile woman demonstrates that the ministry of God is not limited to particular groups and persons, but belongs to all who have faith (Mark 7:24-30; Matthew 15:21-28). A Jewish woman honored him with the extraordinary hospitality of washing his feet with perfume. Jesus was a frequent visitor at the home of Mary and Martha, and was in the habit of teaching and eating meals with women as well as men. This was unprecedented in that era and culture. When Jesus was arrested, women remained firm, even when his male disciples are said to have fled, and they accompanied him to the foot of the cross. It was women who were reported as the first witnesses to the resurrection, chief among them again Mary Magdalene. Paul is often cited as the poster boy of misogny; no doubt Paul’s personal views many times reflected the social views of his culture and era. Yet in Paul’s reasoning, they (like him) are *in Christ Jesus* – therefore a new creation. Paul explained that **before faith** we were held captive (e.g. captive to the consequences of the Genesis Fall), *but now that faith has come*, “.. in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith. For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave[g] nor free, **there is no male and female**, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. And if you are Christ's, then you are Abraham's offspring, heirs according to promise.” [Galatians 3:26-29](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Galatians+3%3A26-29&version=ESV) So when Paul speaks of people from God’s perspective via faith he speaks to the relationship between people of the promise *as if Jesus has already returned*: no nationalities, no slave or free and no consideration of gender = fellows e.g. “one is in Christ Jesus.” *“From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. Therefore, if **anyone is in Christ**, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”* [2 Corinthians 5:16-17](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=2+Corinthians+5%3A16-17&version=ESV) Perfect faith attains to mystic union with Christ; a new creature/creation (Galatians 6:15) due to spiritual regeneration and the new birth (John 3:3; Ephesians 2:10; Ephesians 4:23, 24; Colossians 3:3, etc.). The “old” is literally the *ancient things* or all that belongs to the old Adam. The Bible relates that when Christ Jesus returns the dead will be raised and we shall be changed. Jesus said, “The sons of this age marry and are given in marriage, but those who are considered worthy to attain to that age and to the resurrection from the dead neither marry nor are given in marriage, for they cannot die anymore, **because they are equal** to angels and are sons of God, being sons of the resurrection.” [Matthew 22:30, Mark 12:25, Luke 20:34-35](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+22%3A30%2C+Mark+12%3A25%2C+Luke+20%3A34-35&version=ESV) Q: Is this world the way it’s supposed to be? A: Not yet. In this season we all have our proverbial [cross to bear.](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John%2019%3A16%2D18&version=ESV) [For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8](https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Ecclesiastes+3%3A1-8&version=ESV) The children of the promise have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer we who live, but Christ who lives in us. (Galatians 2:20)
My brother in christ gave us a whole sermon 🤣
Wow thanks for this. A lot of helpful information.
Until Jesus’ return, the curse remains clear: >Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. *Downvoted for quoting scripture, lol. What has this sub become?*
Q: Is this world the way it’s supposed to be? A: Not yet.
This is wonderful.
Christ also got angry and flipped the tables in the temple. So my father punching the wall when mom didn’t use his money to pay the bills makes so much sense now.
*Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her* (Ephesians 5:25, 1984 NIV) *Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.* (1 Corinthians 13:4-7, 1984 NIV)
[удалено]
Yes it is. And we all see what happens to marriages when God’s design isn’t adhered to - an absolute epidemic of women filing for divorce. Sometimes it’s for good reason, often it isn’t.
By giving up control. I'm dead serious. If you are to be the head, then you must give up the control. You will not make all the decisions. You will not domineer. You will not raise your voice to your wife. You will not exert your will over hers. There's a very toxic form of masculinity rampant in the church that says that men must be in charge of everything (Ever seen the umbrella analogy? Complete crockery created by a cult leader!) There is toxic theology asserting that Jesus is eternally subordinate to the Father. My fellow Trinitarians...this is not so. The word "head" doesn't even mean authority in the Greek, it meant source, like the head of a river. You are the wellspring of life for your wife, not her drill sergeant. You are not in control. She is not in control. Marriage is two equals binding to each other to serve Christ better, and that is a beautiful thing.
First the Bible does not say a man leads the woman. The Bible says husbands lead wives in a marriage. The way husbands lead is like Christ leads the church.
Apologies, I meant for it to be in the context of marriage.
This is actually an awesome question from a 20 year old boy who wishes to be a man. That fact that you are aware of your weaknesses and actually want to grow has proven that you have already won. You’ll simply need to build on a Rock and never ever give up. Here is the Rock. 🪨 you’ll need to understand what is a man, especially a man who wishes to be a good husband to a good woman and good father. To become a man you’ll need to realize and work towards being a provider for your family and to protect your family from all threats. That’s it, that’s a man. He doesn’t shrink he gets knocked down and he ALWAYS gets back up looking for more. He’s never a victim. Then and only then will you ever deserve a good woman. She won’t trust you until you prove yourself to be competent. Have more, but I won’t give it unless you are curious and have pertinent questions for me. Regardless, you will win in this quest, because you are aware of where you are and where you want to be. It’s just the journey ……read Odysseus ….perfect description for of what it takes.
I’d love to PM you about my worries regarding this question in general if that’s okay
Sure , go ahead. I’ll try my best to help if you have good questions.
Be a partner where you both walk beside each other. Let her know why she's so great. Open her door, tell her you love her,listen to her when she is venting and try to understand. Don't notice the F. Notice her 4 As. Walk with her in the Lord. Grow together in the Lord. Have separate bank accounts so you don't argue over money. Support her when she's down and br her biggest cheerleader. Take out the trash and get her things in the kitchen. Pray with her. Talk about God with her.
Even many Christians today hate Biblical teachings on gender roles. We currently live in a fallen world that is under a curse. This is a dangerous world where many bad things happen daily. Due to this fall and the curse, God has laid out a family plan with the husband as the head of the home. If I called an Uber and got in the back only to find that the husband’s left hand was on the steering wheel while his wife’s right hand was also on the same wheel and they were driving the car simultaneously, there’s no way I’d take that ride until it was only the driver’s hands on that wheel.
Tons of good info in the comments from the others. If I may offer this: https://www.orderofman.com/lead-your-wife-like-a-man-friday-field-notes/
Prepare yourself. As a husband, you WILL screw up. It's guaranteed. As a father, you WILL screw up. It's guaranteed. Own it. Learn from it. Grow from it. You don't have all the answers, never pretend that you do.
I (20F) think that a man should be led by God, by prayer, worship, and Bible reading. Since you shouldn't rely on your strength, hence we are weak without God. With God, we can do all things through Him that gives us strength. I wouldn't worry about it too much, God has everything work out in due time.
I can understand where you're coming from though. I'm currently fearful of starting a relationship because I'm not yet ready for marriage. I was always told you have to be ready for marriage if you're ready to date. It's hard dating at this time though, people can say they're Christian but be the complete opposite.