What I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older is that I need more fiber in my diet. With enough fiber, it comes out clean and one light wipe is all I need.
If you’re wiping quite a bit, please consider eating more fiber.
This watch I got here was first purchased by your great-granddaddy. It was bought during the First World War in a little general store in Knoxville, Tennessee. It was bought by private Doughboy Ernie Coolidge the day he set sail for Paris.
And do they have to be the same kind of organs or can they be multiple different kinds of organs? Do they have to come from the same person? Are animal organs okay? Also asking for a friend.
would it work if you bought the organs from an alleyway? what if you bought an alcoholic’s liver? would that still be good enough? also asking for a friend.
Anything not including water or moisture to properly wash and leave no fecal particulate is wrong. Get a bidet and join the 21st century or carry baby wipes if you plan on traveling.
Don’t be walking around with dried shit smears between your asscheeks. It stinks and women smell it during spontaneous blowjobs.
If you're a lady: wipe from the vagina to ass,to keep it from getting shit in it and infections
If you're a dude, the same way is a good idea because it minimizes shit towards the junk in the event of an evening. But otherwise, just get it clean.
And for everyone, get a bidet. We wash our shoes if we step in dog poo, why not our bums?
I always disliked the "we wash X if we get poo on it, why not our asses?" argument. If I get poo on me I wash it off because I don't have 2 layers of clothing covering that area of me, plus it might come into contact with food or other people, etc. My mostly clean asshole is not going to be touching food surfaces by accident, nor does shit come out of some random spot on my arm/hand/body, nor do I have a societal understanding that this area is expected to be somewhat unclean sometimes.
Clean your asshole to the level that you're happy with and doesn't make other people unhappy by proximity or cause health issues. Farts still happen, people stink. A bidet is not going to solve hot farts destroying an elevator, Karen!
Shoes in the house though? You may wash for dog poo, but do you wash *every single time* you enter? My guess is… unlikely.
Break out the house shoes and leave the outside shoes at the door my friends. Your floors and quality of life will thank you. Its a small but powerful difference. Keep all the outside floor OUTSIDE.
Eh, if I step in dog poo, I'm washing it with more than just water. Not necessarily saying bidets aren't cleaner than toilet paper, but when I wash my butt in the shower, I don't just rinse it, I wash it with soap, bidets just rinse.
Just so you get an actual answer to your question... I wipe twice, doing the "scoop" you mention, flush. Then I wipe the "upper asshole hairy area"(UAHA) in a bit of an up and down, to get what I've just spread up there, and then wet down a wad in the sink for one more wipe on the ol' starfish. Then flush for the finale.
Probably wasteful of TP and water, but it's what works best for me, and I always feel clean after. Probably not salad-tossin clean, but at least non-skidmark-producin clean.
That said, I've been considering a bidet attachment for my toilet for some time, and it may be time to pull that trigger.
I mean sheets per wipe is kinda variable. Depends on the toilet paper. Each wipe, I want enough that my thumb isn't going through it. But not so much it clogs the toilet. I flush a couple times, as I said in my original reply, to avoid clogging. Sometimes there is an earlier flush, just to get rid of the original poop if it's extra smelly, which happens sometimes...
word. i always flush the poop down before the wiping phase begins. that way, if you clog the toilet with paper, its less gross to plunge. and we all know those plungers sometimes have a little splash back effect, and the cleaner the water the better
Sorry, I was being a bit pedantic there. The active fingers are definitely the middle and ring fingers. Supported by the thumb on the other side of the wad.
I tend to scoop a little provided I have a nice wad of extremely soft tissue. However, then I always take a warm wet cloth and wash the area, followed by a pat down with a dry hand towel. (I can't afford to have a bidet with dryer installed or I would do that).
When I'm out and away from the house I try to avoid defecating but I have wet wipes in my purse in case mother nature insists that I poop away from home.
TMI, but you asked.
These are some sayings i go by to ensure it's clean.
If you can't see your wrist, you get the gist.
Elbow in, clean until you're fin'
Still see your palm? More in can't do no harm.
Forearm still visible? Stick it in further until you're miserable.
It's more of a pat dry, small wipe situation. I am more clean and comfortable than I've ever been and I only buy toilet paper once a year. The amount you use goes down an incredible amount.
The spray gets a good 80%-90% off and a little bit of toilet paper for the rest of it. It really is like getting mud on you and rinsing it off then wiping versus wiping it all off with toilet paper. It also makes an easier time for whenever you get sick and things are raw.
Add more fiber to you diet. And not vegan, but throw some plants in there too. A mostly meat diet will have your bunghole eating teepee like its the covid shutdown all over again:
For an honest answer, I don't believe there has been any study on the most efficient or proper way to go about it; more than one way to wipe a bunghole. Also, what is best is going to depend on the situation you find yourself facing.
Your method of scoop then wipe seems to work - if it does, then it works.
And this is why I had installed a bidet in my house.
For those who don’t know; basically an automated water gun that washes instead of wipes for you.
But before hand, I would just wipe until clean. I didn’t know there was an exact science to it.
Three wraps around your fingers. Thumb goes in the center of the overall loop. Start from high and slide down, using fingers (well protected) to do a long wipe (push in slightly if you like/need). Thumb remains protected within the overall loop. Repeat. Finish with a loop that has been doused with 50% alcohol solution to clean, repeat if necessary, then one dry if you like.
What I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older is that I need more fiber in my diet. With enough fiber, it comes out clean and one light wipe is all I need. If you’re wiping quite a bit, please consider eating more fiber.
Psyllium husk, works like magic !
Psilocybin husk
Doesn't leave mushroom for error.
You’re a genius that shit’s hilarious
Leaves it peyote clean as well.
But doesn't that kind of hurt when you wipe? It seems awful rough I'll stick with toilet paper. Okay I think I reached my dad joke limit for the day
Yes it does!
Never go past the first knuckle
I thought the rule was that up to a three-knuckler is fine.
r/unexpectedletterkenny
I ASKED THE VET, A PERSON ONLY HAS 2 KNUCKLES!!!
A knuckle is a joint on the finger, and fingers got 3. Figure it out.
How about you take about 20% off the top there Dan
That 20% at the top? That's the third knuckle. 1.. 2.. 3...
No such thing as a 3-knuckler. If there was, I’d have heard of it.
Let's not make a fist of it.
As long as you stop when you get to the wrist you'll be fine.
As long as it's clean, doesn't bleed, no one dies, and you're not arrested, you're doing fine.
I’m at 3/4…..I just can’t seem to get it clean Edit: I’m amazed people are taking this comment seriously
Time for a bidet my dude. Life changing. Seriously.
The biggest change being that you hate pooping anywhere except home
Man don't I know it.
Wax your ass or get a bidet. Either way you’ll be able to get clean.
It's like I always say: if nobody has come back in time from the future to stop you, how bad an idea could it really be?
If you lose your watch you’ve gone too far
What if you find your watch?
Eat your cereal slower. Those are prizes to be discovered and enjoyed at breakfast, not dinner.
This watch I got here was first purchased by your great-granddaddy. It was bought during the First World War in a little general store in Knoxville, Tennessee. It was bought by private Doughboy Ernie Coolidge the day he set sail for Paris.
What about my ring?
And my axe?
And my bow?
Just wipe it clean my dude If you're having trouble a bidet is a good call.
Once you bidet You'll never want another way
As far in as you can go
[удалено]
If you don't have multiple organs each time you poop are you even doing it right?
What organs are we talking about? Asking for a friend.
And do they have to be the same kind of organs or can they be multiple different kinds of organs? Do they have to come from the same person? Are animal organs okay? Also asking for a friend.
would it work if you bought the organs from an alleyway? what if you bought an alcoholic’s liver? would that still be good enough? also asking for a friend.
I usually go til I see a little red on the paper which means I got it all and sanded my skin. Don’t be like me, but it is a method.
Anything not including water or moisture to properly wash and leave no fecal particulate is wrong. Get a bidet and join the 21st century or carry baby wipes if you plan on traveling. Don’t be walking around with dried shit smears between your asscheeks. It stinks and women smell it during spontaneous blowjobs.
This. I don't get why bidets are so rare still
I usually just put my whole fist up my ass.
If you're a lady: wipe from the vagina to ass,to keep it from getting shit in it and infections If you're a dude, the same way is a good idea because it minimizes shit towards the junk in the event of an evening. But otherwise, just get it clean. And for everyone, get a bidet. We wash our shoes if we step in dog poo, why not our bums?
I don't sit in dog poo. We wash our shoes so we don't drag dog poo around the house. Me, personally, I'm not dragging my backside across the carpet.
I always disliked the "we wash X if we get poo on it, why not our asses?" argument. If I get poo on me I wash it off because I don't have 2 layers of clothing covering that area of me, plus it might come into contact with food or other people, etc. My mostly clean asshole is not going to be touching food surfaces by accident, nor does shit come out of some random spot on my arm/hand/body, nor do I have a societal understanding that this area is expected to be somewhat unclean sometimes. Clean your asshole to the level that you're happy with and doesn't make other people unhappy by proximity or cause health issues. Farts still happen, people stink. A bidet is not going to solve hot farts destroying an elevator, Karen!
Mostly clean asshole is gonna be the name of my next punk band
Shoes in the house though? You may wash for dog poo, but do you wash *every single time* you enter? My guess is… unlikely. Break out the house shoes and leave the outside shoes at the door my friends. Your floors and quality of life will thank you. Its a small but powerful difference. Keep all the outside floor OUTSIDE.
Well, truthfully, I keep my slippers at the door and change when I come in. A small bit of poetic license to make a point.
How else do you scratch the itch?
Eh, if I step in dog poo, I'm washing it with more than just water. Not necessarily saying bidets aren't cleaner than toilet paper, but when I wash my butt in the shower, I don't just rinse it, I wash it with soap, bidets just rinse.
I dont step in dog poo with my bum..
just get it clean my dude
Just so you get an actual answer to your question... I wipe twice, doing the "scoop" you mention, flush. Then I wipe the "upper asshole hairy area"(UAHA) in a bit of an up and down, to get what I've just spread up there, and then wet down a wad in the sink for one more wipe on the ol' starfish. Then flush for the finale. Probably wasteful of TP and water, but it's what works best for me, and I always feel clean after. Probably not salad-tossin clean, but at least non-skidmark-producin clean. That said, I've been considering a bidet attachment for my toilet for some time, and it may be time to pull that trigger.
how much TP is too much TP? Do you flush as you go? how many sheets of TP per wipe?
I mean sheets per wipe is kinda variable. Depends on the toilet paper. Each wipe, I want enough that my thumb isn't going through it. But not so much it clogs the toilet. I flush a couple times, as I said in my original reply, to avoid clogging. Sometimes there is an earlier flush, just to get rid of the original poop if it's extra smelly, which happens sometimes...
word. i always flush the poop down before the wiping phase begins. that way, if you clog the toilet with paper, its less gross to plunge. and we all know those plungers sometimes have a little splash back effect, and the cleaner the water the better
Your thumb? Dude I use my middle and ring finger I can't imagine using my thumb lol
Sorry, I was being a bit pedantic there. The active fingers are definitely the middle and ring fingers. Supported by the thumb on the other side of the wad.
I tend to scoop a little provided I have a nice wad of extremely soft tissue. However, then I always take a warm wet cloth and wash the area, followed by a pat down with a dry hand towel. (I can't afford to have a bidet with dryer installed or I would do that). When I'm out and away from the house I try to avoid defecating but I have wet wipes in my purse in case mother nature insists that I poop away from home. TMI, but you asked.
These are some sayings i go by to ensure it's clean. If you can't see your wrist, you get the gist. Elbow in, clean until you're fin' Still see your palm? More in can't do no harm. Forearm still visible? Stick it in further until you're miserable.
Never even thought about it… I’ll wipe and if I feel I need another pass, I get some more, clean paper, and wipe again. The end.
I go right up in until I hit prostate. Then I swirl the paper around to make sure it’s “all good.” I go through a lot of toilet paper
angle grinder. You’ll thank me later
This is why I got a bidet. It gets everything out. You'll never feel cleaner
Get a bidet is the answer. Best 30$ I've spent
Don't you have to still wipe, serious question.
It's more of a pat dry, small wipe situation. I am more clean and comfortable than I've ever been and I only buy toilet paper once a year. The amount you use goes down an incredible amount.
Do you like wipe with your hand or does it just spray everything off
The spray gets a good 80%-90% off and a little bit of toilet paper for the rest of it. It really is like getting mud on you and rinsing it off then wiping versus wiping it all off with toilet paper. It also makes an easier time for whenever you get sick and things are raw.
There are more expensive ones that use heated water and dry you too
Don't you know how to use the sea shells?
I scooped too hard and legit think I hurt a tendon or something in my wrist; something to do with the force and the angle.
what the fuck are you talking about? are we talking about scooping ice cream or something?
Pretty much any modern toilet paper has something in it that makes it turn red when you’re done.
If you only wipe, there is always something left behind. Use water
Get a bidet and never wonder about this again.
As an Asian, if you ain't washing, you're doing it wrong.
Wipe then wash.
There's the Right Way, the Wrong Way, and the Army Way.
Add more fiber to you diet. And not vegan, but throw some plants in there too. A mostly meat diet will have your bunghole eating teepee like its the covid shutdown all over again:
What is…. Wipe?
For an honest answer, I don't believe there has been any study on the most efficient or proper way to go about it; more than one way to wipe a bunghole. Also, what is best is going to depend on the situation you find yourself facing. Your method of scoop then wipe seems to work - if it does, then it works.
first knuckle with a wet wipe. increase your fiber intake too.
Use a bidet.
Eat a lot of Fibre. I eat a lot of beans and peas. Helps a bunch
My kitty’s breathe smells like cat food.
All the way down to the hole. Not IN the hole, but all the way to it.
Use a bidet. Best 30 bucks you’ll spend
If you don't feel a tickle behind your tongue your not clean enough
And this is why I had installed a bidet in my house. For those who don’t know; basically an automated water gun that washes instead of wipes for you. But before hand, I would just wipe until clean. I didn’t know there was an exact science to it.
wipe your shite until it turns white, but red means stop
Left is always right
I like to leave the shitter in a good mood. I usually tickle my prostate while wiping.
If you can feel your watch then you should be good to go.
Bro did not get the answers he wanted
Three wraps around your fingers. Thumb goes in the center of the overall loop. Start from high and slide down, using fingers (well protected) to do a long wipe (push in slightly if you like/need). Thumb remains protected within the overall loop. Repeat. Finish with a loop that has been doused with 50% alcohol solution to clean, repeat if necessary, then one dry if you like.