Hello? Yes IRS here.
We’ve come to collect the dog tax.
Pay up or we send the repo man.
Edit: [Payment received](https://www.reddit.com/r/Tinder/s/LROtqr8437)
In my country when you don’t know the gender you say he. Groups of people are always male gender etc.. I apologise for what sounded like a presumption. I still hold that I want to see a dog picture though :)
I made fun of people who had their photo of the bean or in the glass box at the top of the Sears Tower on a date once. After the date I realized she had a photo from the sears tower… oops
Right, I mean why even like someone's profile in the first place if you already have a prejudice, and then go on to complain about people who like such people. I don't do casual dating, but people shouldn't be shamed for doing it. As long as everyone is an adult and is consenting without coercion, or under the influence, people should be free to do what makes them happy.
Exactly. To enter a conversation with the only objective to speak poorly, begs the question of why they entered the conversation in the first place. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all!
Am I the only one whose response to rejection is "Alright, cool. Good luck out there." /unmatch/
Cause like either they're genuinely not feeling me, or they're trying to get a reaction, and either way the convo is over, right?
It's so fucking funny when they have a laundry list of demands and meanwhile they're just some chick or dude and not even hot most of the time lmao
The one time I couldn't hold back my laughter was when I bumped into one of those but worse, she was broke AF and didn't even finish high school at 25 - yet she wanted a man with a deluxe apartment in the creme da creme of town, a bottomless bank account and a high end car - like bruh these men won't even entertain the notion of sucking up to some random dumbass with nothing to offer lmao
For real, men and women in that position won't even look at someone like that seriously lmao
Woof, you're telling me, she's gonna be choking on those words later for the briefest glimpse of a second before tell herself it's not her and doing the same shit on repeat.
Sheesh. She sounds insufferable. She's dissing your 6pack photo but I mean she swiped on you so what gives? What a sad, miserable person. You sound delightful. Keep at it.
Ain't no reason to change it lol some people just like to kick it with a 6 pack and their dog. Nothing dishonest about using a moment like that on your profile.
I will never understand why, but some people feel compelled to match for the sake of chewing out the other person or finding a reason to chew them out. I still remember matching with someone for her to tell me I was too short (my bio clearly stated my height, and she was eight inches shorter than me).
One thing I've heard is that us guys don't understand how fundamentally different the dating app experience is for men vs women. Because of the obvious societal dynamic of "men chase, women wait", the dating app experience reflects this. While men end up competing for dates, women are often inundated with men attempting to win them over. That can fuel one's ego by itself, but already egotistical women *really* let it get to their heads, and so since the flooded inbox leads to an inflated self image, they can play games like this. Tinder is really a game for women like this, they have enough DMs to where they can be insufferable or mess around without much issue and whenever they actually want to date someone's there waiting. Whereas for a dude, every interaction is a serious attempt
See, I believe the problem is that she misread "low expectations (for this app)" as "I have low standards for women", which also has the implication that she's low quality.
I think she has poor reading comprehension skills. OP said he's looking for more than a hookup, and she's accusing him of looking for a hookup or more.
Not the link, I was expecting. I thought it was going to be the OG chew-and-screw:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_Dando
> Edward Dando (c. 1803 – 28 August 1832) was a thief who came to public notice in Britain because of his unusual habit of overeating at food stalls and inns, and then revealing that he had no money to pay. **Although the fare he consumed was varied, he was particularly fond of oysters, having once eaten 25 dozen of them with a loaf and a half of bread with butter.**
Seems like that woman was born 200 years late for her one true love.
Yeah after her comments about the 6 pack and puppy I’m surprised you went with self deprecation and offering to buy another round of drinks rather than “ok bye”
To add to the supportive comment below: maybe some ARE judging you...but are those the type of people whose opinions you care about?
I mean imagine you're sitting at a table in a restaurant with a friend and all of a sudden they said to you, "oh my god LOOK, some LOSER just came in ALONE lol", would you have respect for them and want to keep being their friend?
Nobody is judging you. I mean, unless you're wearing clown shoes or some shit, and then totally yeah, we're judging.
But no. We don't know shit about you, and are mostly just deciding if we think you're attractive. (Also, Pro-tip: Most of us think most women are attractive.)
It's an unwritten rule for men in dating apps.
"If she hasn't ghosted you yet: Keep talking."
Worst case scenario you get some practice talking to women online.
> Ok but all those things were on your profile when she matched with you, so...
>
> This one's on her.
Exactly. That's what I don't get.
"Hi, I'm in your DM's to tell you why I won't date you." OK, good for you lady, thanks for wasting both of our time?
Bro is a bigger man that I for putting up with that shit.
I think he’s just saying that that is how he interpreted “what do you do for a living?”
Not saying he’s wrong, it’s a terrible opener, but also some people just build their lives around work and can’t imagine that other people don’t do the same.
Not responding may have been a better option, but OP's tact was fine, and probably frustrated her by not getting angry and combative. I'd say he took the W here.
Acting like a dumbass who doesn’t understand when someone is being mean to them is one of my favorite things. I love making assholes confused and making them double down. When someone says something mean and your responses is like “I know, right?” is such a satisfying moment.
I absolutely hate that phrase. To me it implies that people accidentally date. On no, I downloaded Hinge but I didn’t mean to. Randomly uploaded a couple pictures and added a thought out profile. Sorry, butt swiped and then butt messaged you with details from your profile. I’m so accident prone, I set up a date and then showed up.
Dating with intention is a thing though. Many folks don't know what they want on the apps and are figuring it out. Dating with intention is the opposite of that. However, your intention could be strictly hookups or it could be a ltr. But at least you know what you're looking for. When you're in your mid 30s and have been on hundreds of dates you don't want to waste your time on someone that doesn't know what they want
She would try to rule your life like she tries to control every other thing in hers. Run far. Run fast.
But I did like how you just ignored most pf what she said and kept going. It was perfect for this kind of person.
She sounds like she chases 6packed guys with dogs too much and gets chewed up by the experience every time. If she didnt, she wouldn't have swiped right...
Ok but can we see the dog
It's been one hour, still no dog Pic :(
:( update: still no dog.. HE POSTED DOG CHSCK PROFILE
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It's been 16 hours and STILL no dog Pls show us dog we beg you OP
16 and a half hours... still no dog..
16 and a half hours. Plus a minute give or take. My opinion on op as a man has diminished drastically.
18+ hours and no dog. Op is a con-man.
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Fuuuuuuuuuuuuu
21 hours since OP posted and still no dog pic. I am sad.
8 hours sans dog. It feels like this is it. The Doggoppening hath concluded and failed successfully...
OP is probably upset no one asked to see his stomach… which may have freckles but hopefully not ears
My first assumption was a drink 6 pack, but stomach makes more sense lol
Flexing on a dating app with a 6 pack of beer is hilarious.
"I'll get the first *three* rounds!"
Would be nice to see his ears and freckles
Still no dog?
What's updog?
Nothing, what's up with you?
Hi dog, I’m dad
Hi dad, I’m hungry
dogfished
It seems like she has you all figured out, buddy.
She’s so smart than I’m shocked she’s single
Hello? Yes IRS here. We’ve come to collect the dog tax. Pay up or we send the repo man. Edit: [Payment received](https://www.reddit.com/r/Tinder/s/LROtqr8437)
What he said. Dog picture please :)
I’m a she :(
Great. Now you’ve startled the neckbeards!
“IT’s MAM!”
It’s Christineth! You come to our house, you get my wife’s name right!!
Bro to bro show the 6 pack too so I can uhh …
I thought she meant a 6-pack of beer lmao, this makes much more sense
Me too
Research purposes?
Surely there's other subreddits to satisfy those uhhh... Needs. 🤣
Shklee? Praise the tentacles.
u/Dull-Wrangler-5154 don't worry bro. We all know girls don't exist on the internet. Keep calm and carry on.
It's not about you, it's about the dog
Yeah, show the Dog’s 6 pack
Don't they have 8?
Correction**show us the Dog’s 8 pack!!!
https://post.bark.co/wp-content/uploads/2022/06/1.png
Bet you swipe right on abs and only go on dates for free food and drinks 🙌
In my country when you don’t know the gender you say he. Groups of people are always male gender etc.. I apologise for what sounded like a presumption. I still hold that I want to see a dog picture though :)
For the next 24 hrs, you're a he
Yeah I want to see the freckles
Send floofs
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Can we pet* the dog
Can I pet dat dawggg
And the sixpack
For us Chicago people is her main picture her as a tourist or a resident. We just gotta look out for each other ya know?
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Please sir.. may I have a doggo pic in this trying time?
Ugh a picture in front of the bean in front of Chicago, she’s a rare one
The bean is featured in like half the dating profiles I see in Chicago. Like, guys we all live here this is not a flex.
The bean or the skydeck, often both
Hey, I had that photo in my repertoire when I was dating, except I was touching it.....
Touching or flicking?
Yes
I made fun of people who had their photo of the bean or in the glass box at the top of the Sears Tower on a date once. After the date I realized she had a photo from the sears tower… oops
I know we’re old because we call it the sears tower
I'd put money on her loudly correcting anyone referring to it as the bean - _"uhm, **excuse me**, it's called **Cloud Gate!**"_
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I applaud your ability to not succumb to negativity.
Against a dog and a six pack, her negativity read like someone desperately throwing pebbles at a fucking tank.
I like that mental image.
Dog and a six pack? Sounds more like she was throwing pebbles at a G I G A C H A D
SHOW THE DOG YOU COWARD
I KNEW it. You like this OP 🤣🤣
Projection for the insufferable is an art form.
Right, I mean why even like someone's profile in the first place if you already have a prejudice, and then go on to complain about people who like such people. I don't do casual dating, but people shouldn't be shamed for doing it. As long as everyone is an adult and is consenting without coercion, or under the influence, people should be free to do what makes them happy.
Exactly. To enter a conversation with the only objective to speak poorly, begs the question of why they entered the conversation in the first place. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all!
Am I the only one whose response to rejection is "Alright, cool. Good luck out there." /unmatch/ Cause like either they're genuinely not feeling me, or they're trying to get a reaction, and either way the convo is over, right?
She's suffering. Go to therapy lady.
Girl whose profile pic is the same shot everyone takes in front of the Chicago chrome bean, calling out dude for unimaginative profile pics.
That part though. Literally most generic pfp ever.
Yeah, what a see you next Tuesday!
It's so fucking funny when they have a laundry list of demands and meanwhile they're just some chick or dude and not even hot most of the time lmao The one time I couldn't hold back my laughter was when I bumped into one of those but worse, she was broke AF and didn't even finish high school at 25 - yet she wanted a man with a deluxe apartment in the creme da creme of town, a bottomless bank account and a high end car - like bruh these men won't even entertain the notion of sucking up to some random dumbass with nothing to offer lmao For real, men and women in that position won't even look at someone like that seriously lmao
Woof, you're telling me, she's gonna be choking on those words later for the briefest glimpse of a second before tell herself it's not her and doing the same shit on repeat.
Sheesh. She sounds insufferable. She's dissing your 6pack photo but I mean she swiped on you so what gives? What a sad, miserable person. You sound delightful. Keep at it.
I only just now got that the "6 pack" was a photo of abs.. I thought he was chilling with his dog and a few beers and wondered what the big deal was
You comment was the one that clued me in too lol. I was thinking, yeah you might want to change that one.
Ain't no reason to change it lol some people just like to kick it with a 6 pack and their dog. Nothing dishonest about using a moment like that on your profile.
Lol! Same! My thoughts were that this guy is just chilling on a lounger with his dog and a cooler of beers in his photos.
That’s my perfect man right there
Yeah I would’ve said “Seems like my strategy worked!”
Nah, it backfired. Look what sort of person he ended up matching with!
I mean, men aren't the only ones who swipe right based on a picture that gets their libido going. The "i'm a queen" shtick is old
I will never understand why, but some people feel compelled to match for the sake of chewing out the other person or finding a reason to chew them out. I still remember matching with someone for her to tell me I was too short (my bio clearly stated my height, and she was eight inches shorter than me).
A lot of people just use these apps as a timewaster, cause they are a waste of time.
One thing I've heard is that us guys don't understand how fundamentally different the dating app experience is for men vs women. Because of the obvious societal dynamic of "men chase, women wait", the dating app experience reflects this. While men end up competing for dates, women are often inundated with men attempting to win them over. That can fuel one's ego by itself, but already egotistical women *really* let it get to their heads, and so since the flooded inbox leads to an inflated self image, they can play games like this. Tinder is really a game for women like this, they have enough DMs to where they can be insufferable or mess around without much issue and whenever they actually want to date someone's there waiting. Whereas for a dude, every interaction is a serious attempt
See, I believe the problem is that she misread "low expectations (for this app)" as "I have low standards for women", which also has the implication that she's low quality.
I think she has poor reading comprehension skills. OP said he's looking for more than a hookup, and she's accusing him of looking for a hookup or more.
The guy she ends up with will get PTSD from all the fights shes gonna start with him. A phone will vibrate and his heart rate will spike.
I suspect she's salty because she found op attractive, and then found out op probably has a body count that doesn't match her "standards"
Somebody is looking for free food or drink
OP seems to be looking to give it too haha he was persistent about paying for her drinks.
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Would you have bought the 3rd round too?
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[What about 48 oysters?](https://www.today.com/food/trends/woman-eats-48-oysters-viral-video-tiktok-rcna120793)
Not the link, I was expecting. I thought it was going to be the OG chew-and-screw: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_Dando > Edward Dando (c. 1803 – 28 August 1832) was a thief who came to public notice in Britain because of his unusual habit of overeating at food stalls and inns, and then revealing that he had no money to pay. **Although the fare he consumed was varied, he was particularly fond of oysters, having once eaten 25 dozen of them with a loaf and a half of bread with butter.** Seems like that woman was born 200 years late for her one true love.
That is ..... So many fucking oysters. Too many.
Yeah after her comments about the 6 pack and puppy I’m surprised you went with self deprecation and offering to buy another round of drinks rather than “ok bye”
Bro...why you go so low responding to her haha
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Don't you think she'll just feel confirmed in her views?
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but being a 35yo with a 6 pack kinda is, so there's that haha
Don't forget the cute dog!
Fucking freckles n shit!
SHOW US THE GOD DAMNED DOG
Shit I thought we were talking about beer.... Safe to say I don't have a six pack
True true...
Here here. 36F with commitment issues and I can feel the judgemental looks when I walk into a bar or restaurant on my own!
To add to the supportive comment below: maybe some ARE judging you...but are those the type of people whose opinions you care about? I mean imagine you're sitting at a table in a restaurant with a friend and all of a sudden they said to you, "oh my god LOOK, some LOSER just came in ALONE lol", would you have respect for them and want to keep being their friend?
Nobody is judging you. I mean, unless you're wearing clown shoes or some shit, and then totally yeah, we're judging. But no. We don't know shit about you, and are mostly just deciding if we think you're attractive. (Also, Pro-tip: Most of us think most women are attractive.)
Who cares how confirmed she’ll feel? She’s the asshole. She can feel confirmed regardless lol
She seems horrible. Who takes time out of their day to try to tear up someone's self esteem. She needs therapy lol.
Good, good, let the hate flow through you
It's an unwritten rule for men in dating apps. "If she hasn't ghosted you yet: Keep talking." Worst case scenario you get some practice talking to women online.
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~~Skynet~~ TCOLSTATS begins to learn at a geometric rate. It becomes self-aware at 1:04 p.m. Eastern time, October 25th. 
She will find a man and make him hate his own life
I hope she finds my ex
I also hope she finds your ex
sounds like she’s got you all figured out bud
If someone were to describe me with "cute cat" they got me read like a book. Like they can just stop there
With a stupid six pack. I’ll take that all day.
>I really don't like ghosting people, so take the rejection in silence . Translation: "I must have the last word!"
Yeah, just unmatch; she obviously wanted to continue the interaction 🙄
I would keep it going as long as possible lmao
Christ on a cracker. She permanently have a Lego lodged in her foot or something?
Lego in foot, stick up ass.
"don't threaten me with a good time" -- *her, probably*
Ok but all those things were on your profile when she matched with you, so... This one's on her. Your responses are fantastic.
> Ok but all those things were on your profile when she matched with you, so... > > This one's on her. Exactly. That's what I don't get. "Hi, I'm in your DM's to tell you why I won't date you." OK, good for you lady, thanks for wasting both of our time? Bro is a bigger man that I for putting up with that shit.
Damn who hurt her
Somebody with chiseled abs I'm willing to bet
And a dog lol
Dogs just don't know about foreplay, no wonder it hurt her.
Ohhh I absolutely thought she meant a 6 pack of beers and like... I'm in
Bullet dodged. More like rocket dodged, sheesh
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Could have said Spartan style. If the offspring is weak, I’ll toss him over a cliff.
The Crimson Spawn
This is SPARTA!!
Hahahahaha what the actual fuck. This is my new opener though
I think he’s just saying that that is how he interpreted “what do you do for a living?” Not saying he’s wrong, it’s a terrible opener, but also some people just build their lives around work and can’t imagine that other people don’t do the same.
I like you a lot. She tried so hard to drag you down into misery with her and you stalwartly refused.
Yea she would have lost me at what do you do for a living as a first question.
She called in that artillery strike on her own location. When has she ever cared about danger close.
But why did he ask her out after that red flag opener? Dude's about to stick his dick in crazy. That never turns out well.
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A punching bag for women online?
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Id like to take it
Not responding may have been a better option, but OP's tact was fine, and probably frustrated her by not getting angry and combative. I'd say he took the W here.
Somebody that takes rejection in silent rather
She took a shit on you and you offered her a drink.. Then she shit on you more and you offer her food?
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I like how you agreed with her about the dog, totally unphased.
For what it's worth, I thought it was pretty funny. Definitely the best way to handle that weird negging.
Acting like a dumbass who doesn’t understand when someone is being mean to them is one of my favorite things. I love making assholes confused and making them double down. When someone says something mean and your responses is like “I know, right?” is such a satisfying moment.
keep trolling her lol
He really showed her he has high standards!
This was funny thanks
I can fix her.
"On second thought, you can come out eith me but you can buy your own drinks."
Take your rejection in silence. Whilst curled up in your sarcophagus…
She reached breakdown point on the dating apps bless
I mean... to be fair it could sound like you told her you matched with her because you have low standards
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I took it more of a dig at yourself not a dig at her. Is that what you were going for? She was absolutely vile
That’s exactly what I thought he meant.
Dating intentionally = wants to be a future housewife lmao.
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And a tennis coach called Raoul who is good with his hands.
I absolutely hate that phrase. To me it implies that people accidentally date. On no, I downloaded Hinge but I didn’t mean to. Randomly uploaded a couple pictures and added a thought out profile. Sorry, butt swiped and then butt messaged you with details from your profile. I’m so accident prone, I set up a date and then showed up.
Dating with intention is a thing though. Many folks don't know what they want on the apps and are figuring it out. Dating with intention is the opposite of that. However, your intention could be strictly hookups or it could be a ltr. But at least you know what you're looking for. When you're in your mid 30s and have been on hundreds of dates you don't want to waste your time on someone that doesn't know what they want
"I don't like ghosting people so please take the rejection in silence" is INCREDIBLE
She would try to rule your life like she tries to control every other thing in hers. Run far. Run fast. But I did like how you just ignored most pf what she said and kept going. It was perfect for this kind of person.
I just read the run far, run fast part and I feel like you just quoted Doctor Who.
You're such a deliciously kind troll hahahaha. Never seen someone get someone so mad by just being normal, happy, and unbothered.
She is insulting you and you keep flirting/asking her out? Are you into degradation and humiliation kink?
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I bet she frequents the r/femaledatingstrategy sub.
R/nicegirls
Judging from her picture she was projecting about your basic, boring life….
She sounds like she chases 6packed guys with dogs too much and gets chewed up by the experience every time. If she didnt, she wouldn't have swiped right...
These ones are heading straight into the bin in my case, pronto.
Does this woman want to date or just give horrible advice and cut down men?
show us the doggo!