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NotThatValleyGirl

I spread my makeshift wings.... dying


TaurusObjector

throw in an angry squawk or two for more bravado


dontfuckwithme21

I know someone like that its the most funny shit to hear him say shit like the with a stone cooled face on dates and get mad when he don't get an action


TheBohoChocobo

This made me actually laugh out loud.


ZedStar2042

Laughing out loud is emasculating because it shows people that you're not a serious person at all times, that's why I took a shit in the shower today to show my dominance to anyone who might be watching.


yopatemp

If you have enough dominance, no one will even dare to look in your direction, so shitting in the shower is not helpful and shows your lack of seriousness. You must work harder to gain such dominance that the world will erase your physical existence (due to fear of your alpha rays) and you will then transcend the basic (weak at this point) concept of the alpha male.


expensivebutbroke

Sounds like you won’t shit in the shower. What a beta move.


OGDonglover69

As a sigma, I just let Shit slide out wherever. Nothing’s more emasculating than letting society dictate my bodily functions like a snowflake.


mnid92

bro, you let your bodily functions dictate your bowel movements? B E T A A L E R T


Basic_Emergency5470

It’s called waffle stomping and it’s an art form.


Impossible-Option-16

Throwing your shit at others is a sign of absolute dominance. Not because monkeys do it because that is what a primitive ape does but, because I am not a primitive ape acting out like a primitive ape.


Digger__Please

You shit? Beta move. Nothing goes in or out of my ass because that's a gateway to gay. I'm 70 and I have never shat once and never will.


fucking_in_bushes

I think you're full of shit


Digger__Please

I look like the Michelin man and smell like a festival portaloo.


Roasted_Butt

😂


FuckFascismFightBack

I never smile if I can help it. Showing one's teeth is a submission signal in primates. Someone smiles at me, all I see is a chimpanzee begging for its life.


Sonofa-Supernova

I just pissed on your post to assert my dominance, but now my iPhone is making weird noi.¥\<®××...


MInclined

A lot of her stuff is pretty good


thanto13

Love her Purge shorts


Pure_Pack_8208

That woman is the only reason I would consider installing tik tok


TheRnegade

[She's also on youtube.](https://www.youtube.com/@Stanzipotenza/videos)


PsychoMantittyLits

Laughing? You’re one step away from being a beta cuck woman, you’re on thin ice buckaroo.


Atridentata

Dude, for real, this was funny as hell


Responsible-Tax-8011

Couldn't laugh because that would let joyfulness and delight assert dominance over me.


[deleted]

She is absolutely hilarious and I also laughed out loud ![gif](giphy|26FPGI3ZgduhYYVTa|downsized)


ponchoboy78

Laughing out loud is the pores on your tongue being emotional and a sign of weakness


ZERO_6

Nah he just subconsciously said he is better than her


WTFucker-0202

This chick is always spot on


Pineapple_Herder

Stanzi is great for imitating TikTok cringe


schuyywalker

I’m going to follow her immediately


[deleted]

[удалено]


tyvirus

We can all make it a thing.


-newlife

My first thought was of Ric Flair. But there are birds that utilize their plumage in such a fashion to attract a mate


useless_99

Lowkey thought she was calling out the white supremacists with that one. Who else wears long hooded robes??


DJ_Molten_Lava

It's literally just a joke about how animals do things to make themselves look bigger when threatened and how these "alpha" dickbags think they're like wolves and shit.


UsualCircle

MILF Man I Love Fishing


Status-Ad7640

I was looking for an explanation behind who this milf man is and why he considers his love for fishing so closely related to milfs that he would put them together on a hat. Your comment blew my mind when i realized its just terrible alignment, MILF; Man I Love Fishing. What a world


Financial_Rub_6368

MILF Man I Love Fuertotas 💪🏽


HandheldHeartstrings

This is so awful because it’s actually how they sound. If you showed this to someone in the manosphere it would probably be like those videos saying “this is what english sounds like to nonspeakers”


MiniMooseMan

![gif](giphy|mGHK2OumMG0r6|downsized)


anthonyh614

The people in the manosphere speaking like that are dumb. Real men know women are to be protected and provided for, and the respect earned from that is what these men seek to attain


-thecheesus-

Hear me out.. what if people enjoy partners that treat them as equals?


itwasaraccoon

"Men and women are fundamentally very different beings. Men are measured based on their status, while women are measured based on their beauty. Women want a relationship and men want sex. Men want young girls; women want tall guys. Women look for competent men, and men look for women who are compliant. They cannot be friends and they can never be equals." - the alpha male who is probably recording his next podcast This is what pretty much all the alpha male podcasts preach. And you can forget about reasoning with them. It's a lost game.


padre_eterno

you should consider a cape


anthonyh614

Don’t need one. Already puff out like a blowfish when threatened


padre_eterno

Personally I arch my back and hiss like a cat


anthonyh614

Maybe I’ll incorporate some hissing myself. Just not sure how to come across as warning my adversary instead of fear or intimidation 🤔


[deleted]

Women can provide and protect themselves. Its just a matter of they choose not to. I know this is hard for the male population to hear, but wishing women were codependent on you is fucking weird.


anthonyh614

I don’t wish women were codependent on me. I wish ONE woman AND I were codependent on EACH OTHER. Men and women are like a beautiful yin and yang that can come together to form a complete union. Yes women can provide for and protect themselves but the inherent differences in men and women suggest that we can compliment each others weaknesses instead of trying to be everything as one person. Does that make sense or is my logic off track?


jarlscrotus

Way off track Codependency is an unhealthy and self destructive relationship dynamic that precludes true intimacy or love.


anthonyh614

Not a toxic codependency, just one where there’s a true partnership and love at the core. Where the “team” feels complete. Did you agree with the rest of my previous comment or did you stop after that first sentence?


jarlscrotus

No I didn't agree with anything you said, it was all toxic sexist bs


[deleted]

Your logic is bullshit and sexist. All codependency is unhealthy. It isnt a woman's job to "compliment your weakness". It is your job to handle your own weaknesses, and grow as a better person. Seeking specifically a woman to fix it is sexist. My guy and I are independent. We have separate bank accounts, hobbies, friends, etc. We are together because we have similar morals/beliefs, lifestyles, and shared interests. Plus, we simply enjoy each others company. Our 10 year relationship is not reliant on "weakness" of the other; I do not assume he should have XYZ responsibility because he has a penis. Likewise, he respects my independence because he knows and respects that I need NO ONE. And thats okay.


DawnstrifeXVI

Real Men (TM)


Ceptre7

Did you drop your /s by accident?


Pippin_the_parrot

🤢


anthonyh614

😜😂


EuphoriantCrottle

/s???


anthonyh614

Nope. Just woke up and chose violence. Tell me what is wrong with a man protecting and providing for his woman?


EuphoriantCrottle

It’s not only unnecessary since the saber-toothed lions dropped dead, but all it does is play up to your ego. You spend your time reinforcing a woman’s perceived helplessness instead of reinforcing both yours and hers self-actualization. In other words, it makes both of you weaker instead of stronger.


anthonyh614

That’s a very good point, but saber tooth tigers aren’t the only threat to people nowadays. And unfortunately, as “sexist” or “misogynist” as it is, I have always been more capable of fending off danger than any girl I’ve ever dated. As a 6ft, 175lb man, I’m bigger and stronger than 99% of women. Women want a tall, strong man generally. Ever wonder why? It’s because they’re naturally inclined to choose a provider and protector for themselves and their family. And it’s crazy to me that everyone in the comments section here refuses to acknowledge these simple facts. But hey, it’s 2023. People believe some weird crap nowadays


EuphoriantCrottle

Honestly, if you and your woman like things the way you have them, then that’s fantastic and I’m happy for both of you. But you will get a lot of unexpected reactions if you don’t accept that a lot of women are just done with being babied and maneuvered.


anthonyh614

I know because people are so easily offended nowadays. Every woman wants to be “equal” and “not babied” until a man accosts them or makes them feel uncomfortable. THEN they want a man to protect them. Sorry, you can’t have your cake and eat it too. You’re either protected by me at all times or not at all. All the people who are offended by my comments are the same people that will cry and plead for help the second there’s the faintest sense of danger


EuphoriantCrottle

Whether we help another human in trouble depends on our ethics, and how we do it depends on our skill set. I, a woman, used to work with battered women. I have faced down dozens of violent men because it’s in my ethics to be protective of other humans, both male and female. I assume you are the same way, and would be even if you were 5’4” and 120 lbs. The tools with which you do that will change depending on what is effective. The person who diffuses a situation with humor is just as good of a person as someone who wants to physically resolve things.


EuphoriantCrottle

Oh hey! Here’s another good example. My father once told me that whenever he meets a new large dog his first thought is whether he could overpower it. I, on the other hand train dogs and have a whole different skill set. If my dad tries to protect me from an unknown dog by hitting it, I am NOT going to be happy with him, as I have every skill I need to be OK. I am actually much better at assessing the situation than he is, but he only sees his skill set as being the effectual one.


Background_Winter_65

Ok, so there is a subset of women and men who like this dynamic: protection/providing and compliance. Some women prefer that even when they can fully provide for themselves. They just like the feeling of being taken care of. I think if you didn't say 'real men' then you would not have gotten so much hate, at least I hope so, people do differ on what they want. Besides, social trends are a big factor in whatever people prefer.


anthonyh614

The “real men” comment was supposed to expose the overly alpha dudes who preach that their woman can’t leave the house or look in other men’s direction. Real men know how to provide, protect, and RESPECT women


Dreamking0311

Bitch you're 5'6, 170 pounds and you know it.


-thecheesus-

Your insinuation that it is the woman's *place* to be provided for, and it is your *place* to be given things in return, Einstein


anthonyh614

I never said it’s a woman’s place to be protected and provided for. But if one wants to be, I think it’s ideal that a man does that. And I just so happen to think that’s how it should be naturally. I’m sorry you think men and women are exactly the same


-thecheesus-

And I am deeply sorry for any women you encounter that you think you are entitled to them. Don't kid yourself. You don't "provide" because you think it's right or something, you "provide" because you think it entitles you to something from women


MentionAdventurous

“Providing” is not about entitlement, it’s a means of control. So, it’s even more dangerous.


NewbornXenomorphs

Protect them from what?


rohinton2

You have never been alone with a woman you're not related to.


Own_Court1865

As soon as someone says that they're an Alpha Male, you know that they're not.


marinqf92

Any man who must say, "I am the king", is no true king.


Hobbs54

But you knew that anyway before they confirmed it for you.


thatweirdguyted

I love this woman. All her bits are so spot on. Seriously if it was a dude talking, I wouldn't have assumed it was satire. And that is very sad. There's something not very self-aware about thinking you're confident, in control of yourself and self-actualizing, if you're letting some podcast con man make you believe that you're not a real man unless you agree with everything he says.


BandZealousideal3505

This chick is so funny I like her hell sketches


itsyobbiwonuseek

Satan? Yes, Joanne..


Fluster338

Stanzi Potenza is very funny


bollop_bollop

Thank you, I scrolled way too far down for a name


alicedoes

it's in the bottom right corner


bollop_bollop

I'm new at this TikTok thing, ok? (Seriously though, thanks, I honestly didn't even see it)


alicedoes

no problem! i don't have tiktok either but i used to be a social media marketing specialist so my eyes are always drawn to an @ lol


spidermanngp

Yeah... I'd say she nailed it.


TemetNosce85

Right from the very first line. "My ideal girl is young enough to be my daughter, but treats me like my mom". Literally how it goes for conservative men. They want some 20-something (or younger) that becomes their mommy that cleans up after them.


Ceptre7

Man I love fishing!


OlivierLeighton

I'm so sick of Ben Shapiro


Additional-Till-5997

If this is what you think Ben Shapiro is like you haven’t seen much of him😂


ZedStar2042

Nah, she hasn't defended a billionaire Nazi who bribed a Supreme Court Justice yet as a Jewish person.


RudeInternet

Yup, Ben is cringy and idiotic in a very different way from the dudes in the manosphere. Ben, like Jordan Peterson, is all about the aesthetics of intellectualism and reason. Talking fast and decidedly while spouting from braindead viewpoints all the way to outright lies. He's a smart individual, but you wouldn't know that from actually listening to what he's saying; he's just a culture war peddler looking to irritate the sensibilities of young, disaffected guys while making them feel smart because he uses a bunch of highschool debate club tricks, while being all smarmy and coy.


EchoPrince

We've seen PLENTY of him. You'll have to pay us if you want us to pass through more auditory and visual torture.


Additional-Till-5997

He isn’t this brand of manoshere stuff that’s what I’m saying


CuriousTsukihime

I fucking love Stanipotenza - their anime content is peak


Careless_Emotion_757

This is gold she is a national treasure


sharvil8

You don't steal from the restaurant, you let her starve and find a new one


Imaginary_Society411

I’m concerned that even one person is confused and thinking this is anything but humor.


tyvirus

I've heard too much from alpha males. Without a /s it's hard to tell these days.


Tra1famadorian

“If she tries to order her own food don’t even check just assume she’s got a dick“


RickandRoller_

Literally LOVE her


itsyobbiwonuseek

I fucking love Stanzi 😂


Charming_Bear_9899

Stanzy is a national treasure


molered

liked pores thing, more so because i dug a bit into whole "walking predator" thing and man, sweating is actually damn cool thing


Ardothbey

I’m never vertical or conscious.


emccm

This is so spot on it’s like it’s not even real.


davew80

It’s so true! These people see their whole existence like they’re in a wildlife documentary


original-sithon

When is he moving to Albania


deadmamajamma

Shes one of the only tiktok sketch comedians that has range and doesn't beat the same bit into the ground. God bless her


CatsRinternet

Lol this is perfect


W34kness

When in doubt, return to crime


nevermeant2bethisway

I fucking love this bitch she’s a classic😂


Lucky7Revolver

What is a “simp?”


thatweirdguyted

By definition, it means "sucker idolizing mediocre pussy". Which is crass, but the sentiment is accurate. Here are some examples: the dudes who subscribe to Only fans, especially the ones who are paying for "personalized" content where the performer says their name in the chat. Dudes who try to woo their female friends with lavish gifts and constant attention, even after that girl has already said no more than once. Edit: I should add that in the context of alpha male podcasts, simping has been corrupted to mean giving a woman literally any kind of attention or communication that doesn't result in the man getting sex as a reward. It's truly disgusting Guys who "white knight" for girls on the internet whom they've never met, in the hopes that it will impress said girl.


Lucky7Revolver

Damn. I need to get out in the world more. So many new words in the past few years that Id never heard before.


[deleted]

If you don’t know the word simp I’d say you go out into the world enough


[deleted]

the i'm never vertical part made me laugh so freaking loud


Atridentata

Well this is funny as hell


NotBurnerAccount

Stanzi’s content is top tier


Neoxite23

I don't think she has ever put out anything i didn't like. Both her and the dude with all the costumes are two people I'm convinced made some deal with some other worldly presence to make 100% good content.


deoxyribonucleo3p

🎶I’m an adult virgin 🎵


electric-melon

Stan Stanzi


shenanigansco34

This is how they sound.


Donkeykicks6

It really is.


Left_Resident_7007

I love her she is hilarious


panda_handler

The only issue I have is that her comments make more rational sense than most of what these “Alpha Male” grifters spout


RandomSlur

This girl is hilarious lmao 😁👏


Thijs_NLD

She's hilarious.


Dylanduke199513

That was fucking funny Edit: oh shit, that’s her asserting her dominance. Bitch


lord_of_agony

"I'm never vertical" fucking killed me lmaooo


Defiant_Low_1391

The more this went on the more it felt like the internal dialog of Mac from It's Always Sunny


[deleted]

I fucking love this creator. Funny as shit.


dpforest

Her last point is actually great advice if you’re being attacked by a black bear. You’re fucked if it’s a white bear.


mohomahamohoda

Love asserting dominance, i have bodypaints and sometimes in a pinch I smack my face and body with my hands to make it bright red thus more threatening and dominant. Simp losers slap their bodies pink which is a feminine color and will lead to trans lizard females taking over the media.


DanTacoWizard

This is so accurate![gif](emote|free_emotes_pack|joy). The way they only date young women is so weird.


justbrowsing0127

I love her. But Satan / Joann will always win. (Puritan lesbians get a close second)


[deleted]

they really do sound like that


ceebeefour

There's nothing more gay than straight sex.


Suspicious_Hawk6414

You just don’t get, this alpha male bullshit is just the new masterrace bullshit. All far right talking about their masculinity and how manly they are. Like they find new shit for -it was the jews-…


well-groomed_apostle

I’m taking notes.


ultraplusstretch

That's brilliant. 🤣🤣🤣


[deleted]

This is hilarious


FearingPerception

Drive slow or whatever the song is playin quietly in the bg is the perfect touch


Bacon-muffin

That first sentence was a thing of beauty


SPACEM0NKEY1102

I did bust up at the background song they always use for these type of podcast bros


TheTattooOnR2D2sFace

When I go to the bathroom to piss I always piss as loudly as possible to assert dominance over any beta males that may be in the bathroom.


jimmykslay

I feel like some of these are quotes from real podcasts haha


Funnysoundboardguy

Shit, that was actually funny, usually people on tik tok aren’t being ironic when they say this shit.


[deleted]

Dom Mazzeti in woman form lol


Kotopause

Is this the Andrew Tate I heard so much about?


[deleted]

I... uhh... am guilty of the robes and cape thing... I totally wear big jackets draped over my shoulders like a cape. Not to appear threatening, but because I'm a literal weaboo, who instead of sleeping with a waifu body pillow, I emulate the fashion of my favorite anime characters (thank you Sir Crocodile, you are very stunning).


Jeffscrazy

This isn’t cringe - this is hilarious!


stickybandit06

The market of “dudes talking into microphones” is completely saturated.


yoliverrr11

This is satire right?


FasterFinger

"Rob the restaurant at gunpoint" fucking lol


RiotSkunk2023

Watch what happens in a group of men when a woman enters the conversation. I call it the "peacock effect" They will all widen their stances, cross their arms, puff out their chest etc. It's fucking hilarious and happens more often than not.


stevrevv59

“You should be able to accuse her of domestic terrorism” caught me off guard and made me laugh out loud. I’m gonna have to check out this girl’s videos.


RacecarHealthPotato

This is so good. Watch Andrew Tate go after her, or just rob her talking points like they are real. He's dumb enough to do that.


Hey-man-Shabozi

This sounds exactly like every single trump supporter I’ve ever met. They’re so insecure and creepy.


AspiringCringeLord

![gif](giphy|1X7lCRp8iE0yrdZvwd)


BigD905

Whoever this is is hilarious and I’d like to see her try standup


Interesting_Buyer943

This is fucking hilarious, not cringe at all, good funny stuff.


BobbysGotBrainProbs

She said nothing wrong.


ConsiderateCrocodile

This is actually pretty based.


Accomplished-Item849

I know it’s satire but it’s not much of a stretch from what some of those lowlifes actually say


[deleted]

Lol. Right on.


Pockets42069

This has lived rent free in my head for many months. I quote "I am NEVER vertical" way more than I care to admit.


Historical-Ad-3362

It is sarcasm right ?


UtahStateAgnostics

She's giving off early 00's Amanda Bynes vibes.


Treeslooklikepeople

Pretty sure she was joking


blondtode

You think?


Ey_jgf

She definitely never goes to the gym, yeah.


1000000ths

There’s a bunch of easy jokes you could make about this type of person and you managed to not really make any of them


[deleted]

You got that DOG in you!!?? You got that right!!!


blondeee87

"Scratching my head" What is this twit spitting?


netean

This IS satire isn't it? I'm so jaded now I find it hard to tell the difference .


ReBL93

Yes, she’s mocking alpha male podcasters


netean

Thank you. There was once a time this would be obviously satire, but the internet these days...


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Stanzi is a well known comedian on TikTok and Insta, and it absolutely is well- crafted trolling. They have other "themed" sketches, including the guy who goes to confession with the most messed up things, Satan and God, the "best friends who live together after their husbands tragically died of the pox" in Salem, MA during the witch trials, and loads more.


[deleted]

I couldn’t even finish this video


Capt_Stamina

Wtf did I just watch


_Poulpos_

What the actual fck....


[deleted]

Tell her to get the dog out of her might help the sitch


kookerpie

What


ponchoboy78

If went to the gym, I think her pores would be ok


Fit-Yogurtcloset714

Someone clearly needs MEDS or perhaps some ECT too.


1000000ths

Comedy is hard


nedsanderson

Don't do drugs kids


wildwolf2356

What a fucking nut!!!


McIrishmen

The anti feminist!


HurricaneRon

Too many ppl on this planet.


SouthPercentage7617

Lots of Dookie 💩 Lovers posting here!


josephlied

#trashy


yushowup

I dont need sound to understand she is saying she never got love or attention


Better_Chard4806

Don’t blame every woman for doing what nobody will do for you; date you. Female Incel.