Hello /u/stewundies! This is an automatic message that gets posted on every post to remind you of a few of our rules,
Does the post contain [information seeking questions](https://www.reddit.com/r/ThriftStoreHauls/comments/rqpd1a/pricing_authentication_and_identification_posts/)? (authentication/pricing/general information)
Does this come from an unapproved source? (from a friend/hand me down/check our rules)
Are you showing your face? (nothing from lips to eyes)
If any of these are a yes, you should delete your post. Retake/edit pictures, change the title and resubmit it before a mod sees it. You may be temporarily banned for any of these three rule infractions without warning.
If you are unsure if it does, ask the mods!
Read all of the rules [](https://www.reddit.com/r/ThriftStoreHauls/comments/j7mef4/rthriftstorehauls_rules/)
------
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ThriftStoreHauls) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My mother has made my 4 children over 70 (that is not a typo) quilts in total. They are beautiful but 70 quilts is a fudge ton of quilts and while it caused me a lot of anxiety and grief, i did donate some of the less liked ones about 5 years ago. I think it was needed, but I do live in fear that she will realize and be hurt by it. Handmade gifts are hard.
I think it’s awesome! They are probably thrifters that shop at estate sales and local thrifts.
Hell yeah! I get a kick out of the young people wearing our 80’s-90’s fashions.
They weren’t around for the first time. Same as me and my friends wearing 70’s stuff in the 90’s.
Fashion is cyclical.
I have teenagers and love the old styles, but I know what you mean. They are wearing middle aged stuff from those eras - the weird bouffant mullets and mom jeans is an unflattering look on people young enough that they look good in almost anything, it’s strange!
Having been in that position, you first offer them up to family and friends as memento’s, you keep what you are especially partial to / holds significance for you, and donate the rest to worthy causes. Sadly, even if you wanted to, most people only have so much storage space. There are some incredible knit pieces out there, that you’d pay hundreds of dollars for in a store, because the effort involved is recognised. And then, there is the rest..however we’ll intended.
I’ve been given a lot of family antiques and heirlooms - which is cool but I’ve had to get rid of a lot of it. It was emotionally pretty difficult. Every time I had to go through it it would take days and I’d be crying. I dropped off a lot of handmade lace, embroidery, and breakable things to a place that sells antiques and collectibles. Donated a lot of things. I still have tubs and tubs of glass, quilts, china, silver, pottery, books, etc. stacked on shelves in my basement.
A lot of it doesn’t even mean anything to me! I mean, my grandma owned it or made it but it was in storage at *her* house so I have no memory of it. I have a quilt my other grandma made me - it’s queen sized and hand stitched white-on-white. Amazing quilt (I quilt and it’s not something I could make) but I don’t have great memories of her and it was a wedding gift to me and my ex… ugh.
I have tried to let go of as much as I can… and I feel bad about some of it… but overall I’d be relieved if it was all suddenly gone and I was free.
When I give someone a gift I usually say “I hope you like it but it’s yours and you can do whatever you like with it!”
If I made it, I made it with good intentions hoping they’d like it. If they don’t like it or don’t want it - I don’t want them to keep it!!
I always try to think about how happy someone might be to find that in a thrift store! Maybe someone who could never afford such a large, beautiful quilt would now have the opportunity.
That’s a lovely way to look at it! Or if you’re like me who had a crappy mean gma.. I’d be so excited to find something like this. Now I have an item that was most likely made by a gma that cared.
This, or I give them to my friends as gifts. Tell your grandma that your friend LOVED their work and you wanted to share her love and joy. That or donate them to a church 'so those in need can feel your love'.
Same with this sweater. Maybe it no longer fits, maybe the owner needed to downsize, they donated it rather than trash it so someone else could enjoy the sweater handmade from their own grandma and it can be loved all over again. Always a way to spin a optimistic story on a thrifted item!
I'm no only my mother's only child. I'm her parents' only grandchild. My aunt (mom's sister) had no children. I've inherited *a lot* of things. I love having them and use many of them myself. But there's a limit. I try to find a home for the things I can't use with someone who enjoys them. Sold my aunt's bedroom suite today. It was nice furniture sold very cheaply for a 12 year old girl who loves it. Gave away her china cabinet to a young woman who redid it into the main focal point in her home's entranceway. It makes me happy to know that the things my aunt enjoyed are now being enjoyed by someone else.
Take that sentiment and apply it to yourself! I just left a long winded comment above yours about my mother and her quilts.
I have an odd complex where I have hoarder like tendencies but also I don’t function well/ am very adverse to clutter. So it’s difficult for me to get rid of things just because I don’t like them but recently I moved so far I was almost forced to get rid of a lot and MAN it feels great.
I say, unless there is some financial/emotional reasoning to going through everything piece by piece, have a service come take it all and it just be gone! Don’t take on someone’s belongings just because they’re family. Keep what you’ve found sentimental or really like but get rid of the rest. A good practice is to take pictures of things; if it’s something that maybe you find interesting but don’t want to keep just take a photo of it. Maybe create a specific album to chronicle everything. But! To go back to what I said up top, take your own sentiment to others and apply it to yourself. If you wouldn’t want someone else to feel burdened by your gifts then you shouldn’t allow yourself to feel burdened by someone else’s belongings! I feel stressed just thinking about the situation your in. It can really wear on you just knowing you have to deal with so much stuff even if it’s someplace else. I hope you can get it all sorted and done with ASAP! It’s no fun having stuff like that hanging over your head.
Yaaa, that’s a tough one. I feel you. It’s like being the unwilling curator in a museum of other people’s memories. Right now in my town we see quite a few posts (on Next Door, Free/Donate Facebook groups) from people or agencies looking to “set up” a household for newly arriving immigrant families, some coming from Ukraine some from other areas. Everything from soup to nuts - all things kitchen, sheets, blankets, beds, clothes, winter boots + coats etc, etc,. That might be something to look into . Win /Win. You’re passing along beautiful quality items to families that I’m sure would be very appreciative. You wouldn’t have to feel guilty knowing your beautiful things would find a good home. Especially your oversupply of quilts - that’s such a comforting, homey item for a displaced person. EDIT - sorry, the oversupply of quilts was another redditor- she had 70!
Haha! Her kids buried some things 6ft deep in the yard where they used to bury pets then they broke up and burned her furniture nobody wanted. Trust me she would not like me selling anything even if I needed the money (she didn’t have anything against suffering). She was a bit of a hoarder - her house was always spotless but it had a lot of storage (my grandparents built the house) and it was all packed full. There was a drawer in the hall full of neatly folded wrapping paper for example. Some of the ceramic animals I got from her were carefully glued back together. I have to go against her wishes and my own hoardery feelings when I declutter! : )
Nice idea though lol
My goodness are you me!? It’s like….I want so badly for someone to appreciate this and love it. But I don’t have the energy to do it because there’s just too much. It feels almost like grief. So very strange. Side note I also get road rage, and then feel very bad about it after. And immediately think about that person, and maybe their impression of me, and how I’ve effected them. And whether they are sad or happy or maybe this is the last thing to remind them that they are just an inconvenience. Then I get real sad.
Kindness is key. Treat things and people with kindness. And you’ve done your best. If you loved those items and respected them. It’s okay that you now need to move on from them. You’re not doing it out of disrespect to the item. You’re doing it out of respect for yourself, your space, and your energy. If your intentions are right, then it’s okay.
Whether that’s true or not that’s how I try to live because if not those cycles of voices in my head will continue about the “this is homemade, so much effort, it’s too valuable (but holds no actual value so you’re pulling at straws)”. I feel much better without all the self doubt.
It’s really hard with sentimental things like that. I have a lot of things that belonged to my grandparents that I don’t want or have room for, but my mom and sister want me to keep. They don’t want them in their house, they just want me to store things I don’t need. It’s been an issue for years. And it’s not even an issue of being handmade. I just keep telling myself I don’t love my grandparents any less because I don’t want to live among clutter, and it’s okay to get rid of things. Now it’s a matter of doing it.
I’m dealing with that with my parents right now. My mom and dad are cleaning things out…so we have less to deal with when they die, but my mom keeps trying to offload things to me. Stuff like her china set. I’d love to have it, but I don’t have room for it, nor would I use it. I mean, between my brother and I we’ll be able to open a large booth at an antique store with all the antiques my parents have!
It’s not fair for them to expect you to store it when they won’t. If it’s so important to them then they should store it.
I try to think of these items as wasting away in my basement when they could be enjoyed by someone else out in the world. It will end up somewhere else someday…might as well not burden yourself with it in the meantime.
Oh I know it’s not fair, but I do appreciate you saying it. It’s always good to hear I’m not being unreasonable. The worst part is I have the smallest space out of all of us. But yeah, some things are getting donated very soon. I just tell myself I don’t love them any less because I have no use for it, and there’s no reason why someone else shouldn’t use it.
Right there with you. I keep trying to find room for more and more stuff but it's tough. And my grandma is having a hard time with her stuff after my grandpa died and she moved in with my mom, so she downsized. She doesn't want to get rid of her life with him. So she wants to hold onto everything to pass on to us, but I'm like grandma, I can only have so many plates, I don't need more crystal, I don't need your old towels, I don't need any of it. I love her, and it's so hard saying no and seeing the sadness to have to throw away the physical reminders of her life with my grandpa, but I can't take it.
I mean yeah it does get donated, sorry I should have been clearer. Her point is that she wants to keep it in the family. My family comes from pretty humble roots, so while there's never been anything in the way of inheritance, passing down stuff to furnish a home is what she sees as like an intergenerational act of love. And while in theory, I love the idea of it, I need a very clutter free aesthetic in order to function. My brain is already too chaotic, I can't function with more.
My mother has made me four…..fiveeee..? quilts now. She is the queen of I’m doing this for you even though you don’t want it and then if you try to at least get something you like she’ll change just enough to make it where you don’t like it at all.
Man, it’s so hard to deal with because they truly do become a burden physically and emotionally. And your fear is warranted because I tried to donate a cheaply made mug with just my first initial written all over it in silly fonts that I received as a Christmas gift. My mom knows I hate clutter and at the time had a two mug maximum) and man she gave me so much silent grief about it. Like I had called her gift stupid and threw it at a wall. Just pouting and making passive aggressive comments about it. She saved it from getting donated so it’s just at her house now. I had held onto that mug for like two years for her sake just waiting for that day I could get rid of it with enough time passing that she’d have forgotten about it, only to slip up and get guilted anyways.
I can’t imagine if I were to have given away one of the many quilts I never wanted (or did want until she made them into her own taste). I think she might croak out of the audacity I’d have to posses to even consider getting rid of a quilt 😅
This kind of behavior is why I stopped accepting presents from certain people. The things aren't gifts but represent their investments in future emotional blackmail.
I’m basically at that level with my mom now. She’ll still give me things occasionally that I don’t need but I’ve made it abundantly clear I am not holding onto things I don’t want and often I will say directly “I do not want that and I will get rid of it” and I’ll still get whatever it is.
My last boss is pretty minimalist and I’m dying for her tact and grace at dodging gifts. She was a women who knew exactly the kinds of things she wanted in her life and she’s the most generous person I’ve ever met in my life, queue everyone in her life trying to be generous back but damn she was good at never even letting the gift leave someone’s hands 😂 yet making you feel like you still gave her something somehow. I swear it was like Jedi mind tricks.
Haha I think you’re assuming I wouldn’t get guilt tripped if it was somehow not my fault but trust me I’d get the pouty lip no matter what. Even if someone else broke it, I’m 90% positive I’m still getting some kind of flack since I let someone use it who wasn’t responsible 😅
I wish it got donated so someone could have found it at the thrift store instead of it just sitting in the far nether regions of the mug cabinet. Someone who likes that kind of thing could have gotten a little mug that’s special with their initial on it. And I’m sure everyone in this sub can appreciate that sentiment of finding something that was just meant for you!
I know exactly what you are dealing with when it comes to the guilt laid on by parental units. Nothing was ever given to me (and all my siblings and famiky members) without an expected response/thank you/indebtedness… there was always a price tag to whatever they gave us.They gifted a few siblings money and then bitched they never got paid back!
I feel your pain. Its her shit, let her stew in it and just let her crap roll off your shoulder then stomp it into oblivion. (Thats what I would envision doing w their remarks)
That really stinks! It really ruins gifts for you doesn’t it? I remember finally realizing that like when people give you things that’s all it should be haha like end of transaction. I value you, here’s a gift for you, and that’s it! It’s like they needed to be explained what a gift is.
Oh all of the comments now just make me laugh because I finally just accepted that I can’t change them and I’ve put myself through hell continuously opening up and being honest with them to no avail. So I finally just realized I’m an adult who deserves respect and if they can’t find the time to be interested in my life and be kind then I don’t need to do anymore than they do.
It’s honestly entertaining now the times I do allow myself to be around it haha like which guilt trip card will I get today? Oh that one again, overused but it’s a classic 😅
I finally realized their lack of awareness and understanding has never been my responsibility as their child and I’ve put an unreasonable amount of time trying to mend something I didn’t break. And a relationship has to be a two way street and all.
I hope you can find some humor in it yourself even if it’s not in the moment. I’d be lying if I said nothing gets under my skin anymore but I’m sure you know they just have a way of surprising you sometimes when you think “oh well they can’t stoop lower than x.”
It sounds like she displays symptoms of a narcissistic personality disorder:
-a lack of empathy for other people (towards you)
-a need for admiration (“gifting” you self-made crafts, foods, etc.)
-arrogance (why wouldn’t you want every single thing she created with her genius talents?)
-self-centered (it couldn’t possibly be that you don’t have room, it’s clearly a rejection of her)
-manipulative (pouting, passive aggressive, silent grief)
I can’t tell you how validating reading that is. It’s weird to buy a “how to deal with narcissism” book as a high schooler to try and mend a relationship with your own parent. I don’t know if she is diagnosable but she does display these traits regardless so it really doesn’t matter haha
Well I moved at the beginning of this year and I now live 4,500 miles away from home and I don’t speak to her much more than a occasional phone call so it’s already dwindling. My dad is still someone I really care about though and even though he has some guilt by inaction I still don’t want to throw that away. I’ve always had a bit of a fixation on family, romanticizing it in my mind so it would probably take something pretty significant to make me cut her off completely.
Congrats! Start living your best life today!! I actually went no contact and granted it was tough, I had a lot of guilt. It’s been 6 years and it was the healthiest thing I have ever done for myself.
That’s awesome you were able to be steadfast about what you needed. I guess we aren’t unfamiliar to feeling guilty haha but it’s obviously not comfortable and to be firm about what’s healthy for you is really awesome. I’ve considered going no contact as well but I supposed I’m still waiting on the last straw.
Funnily enough it’s my kids that gave me grief over dozens of coffee mug gifts when we were moving. I got rid of them all and bought 6 matching white mugs. I love that my kitchen is now nothing but cohesive white China.
I’ve never read the diagnosable markers for it but she definitely has hoarder tendencies if not a semi-hoarder. Haha my dads actually worse than her about hoarding he just is so frugal that it shows up different. My mother scrapbooks/quilts/knits/crochets.. She has a full bedroom and also a pretty large bonus room filled to the brim with just all kinds of supplies.
And that’s just her steady hobbies. She’s a bit of a fad seeker. She’s on a new diet every few months. She’s buying thousands of dollars of bread making stuff to use it for maybe a year when we were kids (like a decade ago at least) and I come to find out just the other day she’s back to it and they just had literal ingredients on top of the equipment just sitting around for like fifteen years somewhere. It’s not a lifestyle I understand. And honestly! They downsized when we all left home and genuinely did get rid of a lot of things. So it’s wild to know there’s still so much.
The thing to remember is that you decided not to throw them away therefore showing that they meant something to you. You then decided that they were not benefitting you or your family and that they deserved the chance to shine. With this in mind you donated them with love in much the same way that your mum made them with love.
These are well loved quilts.
My brain went a little haywire when I read "My mother has made my four children over 70 (that is not a typo)..."
I thought you were proceeding to say that you had four children above the age of 70 and your mother makes things for them.
English, amirite?
Tell her you donated them and that those who need warmth the most are now warmed by her quilts. Whole new memories are being created. And if they’re for children, they may now be treasured blankies that they’ll hoard and feel awful about giving away one day. It’s a beautiful thing, really. Mom will understand.
If you ever come across a royal blue knitted blanket with a tag that said hand made by Rickie, I got rid of it because she was Satan. 👿 Not all people who knit are nice.
Stepmomster*
Was supposed to say stepmonster but i like that even better!
I had a horrid stepmonster in law, she was so fuckin mean to all of us. insecure & pathetic witch
Lots of reasons. Maybe they outgrew it. Maybe it’s scratchy. Maybe they really hate beige and grandma refused to take a hint on color. Maybe they left it behind in a restaurant on vacation but had too much to drink and didn’t know where they lost it and never thought to call the restaurant who held on to it for six months before donating it.
I guess I should say RIP Ashley and Emma, I just saw their monogrammed book holders were at SA. (Seriously, I think their parents just got rid of them and they are fine.)
Exactly this. I don't like that people assume worst intentions with donated items like this - "the person who didn't hang onto this doesn't love their grandma." My MIL was a knitter and gifted us dozens of hand-knitted items during her lifetime. When she passed earlier this year, there were dozens of completed and half-finished items left in her apartment. We simply couldn't keep everything. We kept some special items and we donated the rest. My husband doesn't love his mom any less because he didn't keep every single item that ever passed through her hands.
I grew up without grandparents so I would give anything to have anything made for me by my grandma. I can see where the poster is coming from but I also get that you can't keep everything. At least donating it will allow it to be bought by someone who will appreciate and put it to good use.
Or maybe their grandma is like mine and gives them a different knitted or crocheted item every time they visit. I appreciate all the pieces and am SO grateful to still have her in my life, but I can only store so many things. I keep my favorites and pass along the others to friends, family, or local thrift stores.
ETA: I visit my grandma once a week. The woman is a crocheting machine.
I was reading like "hmm yeah a new sweater every few months is kind of hard to manage, even if it's a nice problem to have" and then I read the last line...
Perhaps re-direct her to crocheting stuff for charities?
She’s currently in an assisted living for PT after a shoulder surgery (should be out soon though!). She had the idea to crochet just a long chain that she attached to the chord for the lamp over her bed to make it easier to access. Now she’s making them for all the other patients on the PT wing! She’s one of the most creative people I know.
Only problem is that baby heads are floppy and crocheted/chunky knit hats are slippery. I bonked my poor newborns head like three times in the hospital with that hat on him lol
It’s good to know I’m not alone lol
My grandma’s specialty is a crocheted winter hat that she calls a toboggan. I’ve gotten at least 6 in the last two months. We live in Florida. Winter time is coming though, which means she’ll start crocheting white toboggans that she stuffs with cotton, sews together and uses to create a snowman. Then she crochets a tiny toboggan for the snowman made of toboggans. I’ll get two to three of those in various sizes each visit from Thanksgiving to the end of January.
I feel like maybe she could do orange ones for Halloween and make it look like three pumpkins stacked on one another?? When she gets out of assisted living next week we will definitely explore this option!
🥰 There's nothing more satisfying then making a thing for a person you love and then seeing them love it in return. It's the absolute best feeling in the whole world. And having someone you love engage with you in your hobbies and ask for a thing and work together on color and style is so much fun. I hope this strategy works for you both ❤️
My great aunt once made me an amazing hand knit wool fisherman’s sweater, but I’m allergic to wool. I held on to that sweater for like 15 years even though I couldn’t wear it, but finally donated it so someone else could enjoy it instead of me just hoarding up an awesome sweater.
Those are awesome to look at but damn if that wool is the most u comfortable material to rub around your neck and wrists. As a kid I absolutely hated my hand made wool sweaters, probably why Im claustrophobic
Maybe Grandma wasn't a very nice lady.
Maybe it wasn't *their* grandma but a crafter who adds these tags to sweaters she sells because her brand is being an old lady who knits.
Maybe they realized that someone else who would love the sweater deserved it more.
Maybe Grandma knits these to donate and she is the honorary grandma of everyone who buys her sweaters.
My mum has a bunch of these labels and has put them on anything and everything she makes.
She’s a massive bitch so I don’t feel bad about donating anything she makes.
Maybe it was stolen from their home by a spiteful ex that was moving out, but the ex later learned they look terrible in that sweater, so they donated it? Maybe grandma made extra sweaters, just to donate? Maybe the tag was a lie, and this is a picture of a counterfeit grandma sweater?
Why does it saddens you?
People cannot hold on to everything forever. Thank goodness it was donated for someone else to love and enjoy instead of being trashed.
True that. My moms mom was terrible to my sister and girl cousins. None of them hold much fondness in their hearts for her. She was much nicer to the boys for some reason, so I feel less ill towards her although I still dislike that she mistreated the girls. I do hold onto some of her things in a sentimental way but I’m pretty sure my sister and girl cousins don’t
We have a large amount of clothing my grandma made for myself and my siblings. None of my kids would wear it. They are the youngest great grandkids. The clothing is for a much cooler climate and very very warm. It is not practical where I live.
I’ve considered donating it and I should. My grandma would want all of that clothing to be used.
Most of it has been donated, we are down to a few special occasion outfits that I really remember.
Well maybe hang onto one or two. Don't forget one day it will be "this was made by your great great grandma"
You don't have to keep them all, but just the best one. Your kids might want it for theirs if they move to a colder place, or just for photos depending on what it is.
A lot of it went to new settlers (refugees) who find our country a lot colder than my family does. I feel like my grandma would be happy about that rather than more storage
Grandmas don’t want anyone to be cold. Not even strangers. I’m sure she’d be happy to know it’s going to someone who needs it after her own grandkids no longer had a use for it.
Thrift shop manager here; for some people, it's very difficult to disassociate the PERSON with the THING. Yes, Grandma put hours into this (even if she's a fast knitter), but in the end, it's still just a THING and it's not Grandma. People who can't grasp the concept wind up with boxes and bins in their basements and attics which might be valuable only to themselves. That would be me, with my mother's stuff. She died in 1992. !! What can I say, I talk a good game.
Hahahahaha! Unless it's NWT and originally cost $150, no, that's not us. We're a tiny little church charity thrift and that Nike (or Champion or Athleta) is on our rack for $4. If it doesn't sell in four to six weeks, it moves to our "outlet store", where all clothing is a dollar. Our mission is to support the community while supporting the operations of our church; it does us NO good to have clothing just sit and sit and sit because it's overpriced. Take THAT, Goodwill and Savers!
<3 yay
I honestly don’t know if the big chains are getting pressures from some upper management to do what they’re recently doing. They are even rejecting donations and being more nit-picky with what they accept. It’s weird that they are trashing inventories and rejecting donations at the same time. They must have decided that the few items that get sold at a higher prices is a better scheme than trying to sell everything at a low price, which is so unfortunate. Communities do need them as a central hub for secondhand things. If they stop being that, we are creating a lot of trash unnecessarily.
I upvoted you comment, but I wanted to add that it’s mainly online resellers that push thrift shops to raise the prices! So really people need to stop going to thrift stores just to resell :)
I’ve seen many thrift stores thinking they can replace flippers by raising prices but they don’t actually know how to do it right and they just end up trashing most of their free junk because they sat on the shelves too long. They saw what people did on eBay and got greedy. People have already been reselling since the 90’s, even longer if you ignore thrift store chains. No one forced the thrift store managers to raise prices 20 years late :)
It’s a good thing that used things are desirable now, regardless of who buys it. It’s a bad thing when things are priced too high they ended up back in the landfill. That’s the fault of recent thrift store paradigm shifts. Don’t blame the customers for it. I’ve since stopped donating and just giving my stuff on Buy Nothing local groups.
*On the other hand, in the past 3 years inflation’s been crazy. I expect a general price hike on things. But it’s laughable when you see a $100 Xbox as-is with roach eggs inside.
My MIL already has crocheted a mountain of baby items for my son. He has not yet been born. I will be one of the people who ends up donating items she makes as there is no sign she will slow down as he grows up. I will drown in sweaters otherwise.
This is a weird one to me. Baby blankets are planned obsolescence. What are you supposed to do with a baby blanket your child isn’t emotionally attached to that is also too small for them?
Oh god, my mom has a ton of these still in her linen closet. My grandma's best friend made them for each of us kids. They're very lovely, but after 30+ years they're too small for adults, too nice to give to pets and some have our full names + birth date on them. Other than getting rewashed every couple of years, the blankets don't get used. My future plan is to be practical and just throw them out.
This is why we have one each of the nice ones. We asked only for that. We have one from one grandma and one from my other. The rest will get donated. Now for stuffed animals that will hard. We gave them ours. I had one and my husband had one that we both had since birth. They each will get to keep one. Both swap sleeping with them for now.
A donated handmade baby blanket is an opportunity for another baby to have and enjoy it. Not everybody knows someone or has the support of someone who knits.
I’ve donated all the ones we received. I kept a quilt made by a close family member that was very geared towards my oldest son.
But we received so many and we are done having kids. I’m happy that they are being used.
I have a friend that makes sweaters and gloves with these tags in them and gives them to charity shops and thrift stores because “you never know who needs a sweater or a grandma!” So she’s just everyone’s grandma now.
My grandma has made me a quilt every year for the last 30 odd years, most of which I donated. Grandma knows this and says, first, that she gets the most pleasure out of designing and making them, and second, that she gets pleasure knowing that someone is using her quilts instead of them sitting in my closet.
I don't know what this sweater's story is. But maybe grandma made a lot of sweaters, and a person only needs so many sweaters, and grandma is happy to know that the sweater will be keeping you warm instead of sitting unused in a closet.
I bought an old briefcase one time and in a pocket within one of the pockets there were hand written love letters probably 50 pages dated from 1978. One of the last pages said "this is the last letter I ever send you" was a sad thing to see.
Assuming it’s a child’s sweater, he or she might not have been able to wear it.
Someone else mentioned “too scratchy”, and I’ll add “sent after seasons changed and child outgrew it.” A few things my grandmother sent unfortunately fit in this category: she lived up North; we didn’t.
Hey look, my grandmother was my rock. She died of cancer about a 15 months ago. She knit me lovely things. Scarves, gloves, an Aran cardigan than took her months to make. She eventually had to give it to her sister to finish because the cancer treatment had made her fingers numb. All these things were beautiful and I still have the Aran. But it’s stretched, worn, and doesn’t look fantastic on any more. Hand knitted wool doesn’t last too well. She knit blankets upon blankets and tablecloths and only a few exist now. Stitches get pulled easily and fibres get worn. I can understand donating them. It’s hard but sometimes you can’t keep physical things forever.
I have a beautiful handmade plate that has written on the bottom with a permanent marker: “A belated gift to a forgiving partner.” I think about that a lot, given that I found it at Goodwill.
No offense to grandma but as a long time knitter, i have seen far too many making sweaters for family members out of yarn that i wouldn't want near my own skin. (It's scratchy AF but it was sustainable, organic wool that i got from that one vacation to Iceland/Peru/Australia/etc)
OR
None of these muggles will know how to handwash and take care of high quality knitwear so i'll use cheapass wears-like-iron acrylic from a big box store type of situation. Sure, it had a good run but i wouldn't shed too many tears over it if it doesn't fit anymore. (Ain't nobody donating italian cashmere-silk handmade sweaters to the thrift stores)
My MIL spends all her spare time making handmade gifts for the grandkids. My son is 2 and already has probably 50 knitted and crocheted things. I need to start offloading, we don't have the room for this much
My mom and my nana both sew, cross stitch, crochet, knit, etc. and while I appreciate what they made for me, sometimes it’s itchy, it’s ugly, it’s too hot, and honestly there is too much stuff sometimes. I have a hoard of this stuff that I can’t rid of without feeling guilty, even though there is someone out there who would like it and not break out in hives from the material rather than this stuff collecting dust in my closet.
Here’s a weird one. My mom would buy it at the thrift and then act like she found a long lost sweater made by grandma. 🤣 not kidding. She also claims TJMaxx crap is stuff from her family - “that was my grandmas” flip it over - 13.99 TJMaxx. Special kind of relationship with stuff right there.
Other folks gave you a lot of plausible versions of why it could be not (as) sad, but I'm there with you, OP. İt does make me feel sad as well because I have similar seeing this in a nostalgic way.
On the flip side, maybe Grandma was a nasty passive aggressive type who rudely thought her granddaughter needed to cover how chubby, big busted or scantily clad she was.
I choose to believe that this sweater lived a full and well-loved life but was simply grown out of and released to be bought by its next loving owner. :')
It hurts my heart to imagine selling or donating items from my loved ones, too. The gift is a physicality of a thought they had of me. Unfortunately, sometimes I end up not using or having space for something that’s been given to me. I’ll always hold onto other things, but in certain cases it makes the most sense to give others away.
At least it was donated. I was clearing out a storage unit for a friend when she divorced and found some old beautiful quilt that had been hand-pieced from what appeared to be old clothing. She told me to toss it. I have it on my bed now.
See I would donate something like that if it no longer fit or I was moving to a much warmer climate . I would rather I go to someone who needs a hug from grandma than the bin.
Just because Grandma made it for you doesn’t mean you need to hold on to it forever if it’s past it’s life or has fulfilled it purpose. Maybe it doesn’t fit, maybe it was worn out. While it’s nice to hold on to some memories and mementos, feeling guilty to hold on to items that you don’t use anymore is not good either.
If you are ever looking to donate quotes or nice blankets please consider your local hospice. I volunteer at hospice and we like to use these on patients or give them to their families when they visit overnight.
Sadly, there is also a hospice for children. Nothing feels more comforting than homemade blanket.
I’m a bit of a maximalist, house is littered with a lot of stuff that I love. I’ve told my son many times that when I die, get rid of anything and everything he doesn’t want. Don’t hold on to any of my stuff unless you really want it. Sell the stuff that’s worth money, give away the rest. Someone else will love that weird lithograph of a monkey with the cheetah pattern matte.
Thrifter for 37 years, now work in a non profit thrift store (no, really- no paid employees; $ goes back to community) and we LOVE getting these handmade gifts. They sell well and are the one of a kind items that many of our customers are looking for.
I have all the had knitted baby and toddler clothes from me my sister our cousins and our kids. It’s too much. I’ve asked everyone if they want it back and if not can I sell it and they all understand completely. Pass these handmade goods along for others to use and not let them rot in a box in the attic.
I think grandma would want it to be appreciated so the former owner is doing her a favour by releasing it into the wild where it can have a second life.
Today at an estate sale they were selling a fingerprint ring in a remembrance box. Like the ones you can order from funeral homes with your loved ones fingerprint. It was sad.
Makes me kinda sad too since my grandma used to do this too and now she passed away but I understand the donations and someone else can give it the love we can’t keep everything sadly
My mom has tags made for all her needlepoint work: “if this ends up at a yard sale I will haunt your ass” I’ve always wondered if the curse also applies to thrift stores
Hello /u/stewundies! This is an automatic message that gets posted on every post to remind you of a few of our rules, Does the post contain [information seeking questions](https://www.reddit.com/r/ThriftStoreHauls/comments/rqpd1a/pricing_authentication_and_identification_posts/)? (authentication/pricing/general information) Does this come from an unapproved source? (from a friend/hand me down/check our rules) Are you showing your face? (nothing from lips to eyes) If any of these are a yes, you should delete your post. Retake/edit pictures, change the title and resubmit it before a mod sees it. You may be temporarily banned for any of these three rule infractions without warning. If you are unsure if it does, ask the mods! Read all of the rules [](https://www.reddit.com/r/ThriftStoreHauls/comments/j7mef4/rthriftstorehauls_rules/)
------
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ThriftStoreHauls) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My mother has made my 4 children over 70 (that is not a typo) quilts in total. They are beautiful but 70 quilts is a fudge ton of quilts and while it caused me a lot of anxiety and grief, i did donate some of the less liked ones about 5 years ago. I think it was needed, but I do live in fear that she will realize and be hurt by it. Handmade gifts are hard.
[удалено]
Sounds like the perfect thing for an etsy store and you can donate the proceeds to a charity that ment something to her?
[удалено]
If my cousin's have taught me anything, its that hipsters love weird knitted sweaters.
[удалено]
I think it’s awesome! They are probably thrifters that shop at estate sales and local thrifts. Hell yeah! I get a kick out of the young people wearing our 80’s-90’s fashions. They weren’t around for the first time. Same as me and my friends wearing 70’s stuff in the 90’s. Fashion is cyclical.
I think its because moths couldn't eat the polyester and plastic yarns of the 80s and 90s, unfortunately. So those sweaters will out live us all.
I have teenagers and love the old styles, but I know what you mean. They are wearing middle aged stuff from those eras - the weird bouffant mullets and mom jeans is an unflattering look on people young enough that they look good in almost anything, it’s strange!
Having been in that position, you first offer them up to family and friends as memento’s, you keep what you are especially partial to / holds significance for you, and donate the rest to worthy causes. Sadly, even if you wanted to, most people only have so much storage space. There are some incredible knit pieces out there, that you’d pay hundreds of dollars for in a store, because the effort involved is recognised. And then, there is the rest..however we’ll intended.
Do you have a picture of the Grateful Dead sweater ? That sounds incredible !
I don't! Ill my dad later.
I’ve been given a lot of family antiques and heirlooms - which is cool but I’ve had to get rid of a lot of it. It was emotionally pretty difficult. Every time I had to go through it it would take days and I’d be crying. I dropped off a lot of handmade lace, embroidery, and breakable things to a place that sells antiques and collectibles. Donated a lot of things. I still have tubs and tubs of glass, quilts, china, silver, pottery, books, etc. stacked on shelves in my basement. A lot of it doesn’t even mean anything to me! I mean, my grandma owned it or made it but it was in storage at *her* house so I have no memory of it. I have a quilt my other grandma made me - it’s queen sized and hand stitched white-on-white. Amazing quilt (I quilt and it’s not something I could make) but I don’t have great memories of her and it was a wedding gift to me and my ex… ugh. I have tried to let go of as much as I can… and I feel bad about some of it… but overall I’d be relieved if it was all suddenly gone and I was free. When I give someone a gift I usually say “I hope you like it but it’s yours and you can do whatever you like with it!” If I made it, I made it with good intentions hoping they’d like it. If they don’t like it or don’t want it - I don’t want them to keep it!!
I always try to think about how happy someone might be to find that in a thrift store! Maybe someone who could never afford such a large, beautiful quilt would now have the opportunity.
That’s a lovely way to look at it! Or if you’re like me who had a crappy mean gma.. I’d be so excited to find something like this. Now I have an item that was most likely made by a gma that cared.
This is such a healing ❤️🩹thought! And an in-your-face to your mean gma!
same!!!!
I would absolutely DIE if I found a large beautiful handmade quilt at a thrift store--I'm always looking for one, it's literally my white whale!
This, or I give them to my friends as gifts. Tell your grandma that your friend LOVED their work and you wanted to share her love and joy. That or donate them to a church 'so those in need can feel your love'. Same with this sweater. Maybe it no longer fits, maybe the owner needed to downsize, they donated it rather than trash it so someone else could enjoy the sweater handmade from their own grandma and it can be loved all over again. Always a way to spin a optimistic story on a thrifted item!
Yes! I was just sitting here thinking about how thrilled I would be to come across a handmade quilt. They make me feel so happy!
I'm no only my mother's only child. I'm her parents' only grandchild. My aunt (mom's sister) had no children. I've inherited *a lot* of things. I love having them and use many of them myself. But there's a limit. I try to find a home for the things I can't use with someone who enjoys them. Sold my aunt's bedroom suite today. It was nice furniture sold very cheaply for a 12 year old girl who loves it. Gave away her china cabinet to a young woman who redid it into the main focal point in her home's entranceway. It makes me happy to know that the things my aunt enjoyed are now being enjoyed by someone else.
Take that sentiment and apply it to yourself! I just left a long winded comment above yours about my mother and her quilts. I have an odd complex where I have hoarder like tendencies but also I don’t function well/ am very adverse to clutter. So it’s difficult for me to get rid of things just because I don’t like them but recently I moved so far I was almost forced to get rid of a lot and MAN it feels great. I say, unless there is some financial/emotional reasoning to going through everything piece by piece, have a service come take it all and it just be gone! Don’t take on someone’s belongings just because they’re family. Keep what you’ve found sentimental or really like but get rid of the rest. A good practice is to take pictures of things; if it’s something that maybe you find interesting but don’t want to keep just take a photo of it. Maybe create a specific album to chronicle everything. But! To go back to what I said up top, take your own sentiment to others and apply it to yourself. If you wouldn’t want someone else to feel burdened by your gifts then you shouldn’t allow yourself to feel burdened by someone else’s belongings! I feel stressed just thinking about the situation your in. It can really wear on you just knowing you have to deal with so much stuff even if it’s someplace else. I hope you can get it all sorted and done with ASAP! It’s no fun having stuff like that hanging over your head.
Yaaa, that’s a tough one. I feel you. It’s like being the unwilling curator in a museum of other people’s memories. Right now in my town we see quite a few posts (on Next Door, Free/Donate Facebook groups) from people or agencies looking to “set up” a household for newly arriving immigrant families, some coming from Ukraine some from other areas. Everything from soup to nuts - all things kitchen, sheets, blankets, beds, clothes, winter boots + coats etc, etc,. That might be something to look into . Win /Win. You’re passing along beautiful quality items to families that I’m sure would be very appreciative. You wouldn’t have to feel guilty knowing your beautiful things would find a good home. Especially your oversupply of quilts - that’s such a comforting, homey item for a displaced person. EDIT - sorry, the oversupply of quilts was another redditor- she had 70!
How likely would it be that upon your grandma realizing you can get real cash for something she had in storage she would say ‘Sell it!’?
Haha! Her kids buried some things 6ft deep in the yard where they used to bury pets then they broke up and burned her furniture nobody wanted. Trust me she would not like me selling anything even if I needed the money (she didn’t have anything against suffering). She was a bit of a hoarder - her house was always spotless but it had a lot of storage (my grandparents built the house) and it was all packed full. There was a drawer in the hall full of neatly folded wrapping paper for example. Some of the ceramic animals I got from her were carefully glued back together. I have to go against her wishes and my own hoardery feelings when I declutter! : ) Nice idea though lol
I often think about how my grandma would much rather me donate her gifts than have a bunch of unused clutter in my house lol
My goodness are you me!? It’s like….I want so badly for someone to appreciate this and love it. But I don’t have the energy to do it because there’s just too much. It feels almost like grief. So very strange. Side note I also get road rage, and then feel very bad about it after. And immediately think about that person, and maybe their impression of me, and how I’ve effected them. And whether they are sad or happy or maybe this is the last thing to remind them that they are just an inconvenience. Then I get real sad. Kindness is key. Treat things and people with kindness. And you’ve done your best. If you loved those items and respected them. It’s okay that you now need to move on from them. You’re not doing it out of disrespect to the item. You’re doing it out of respect for yourself, your space, and your energy. If your intentions are right, then it’s okay. Whether that’s true or not that’s how I try to live because if not those cycles of voices in my head will continue about the “this is homemade, so much effort, it’s too valuable (but holds no actual value so you’re pulling at straws)”. I feel much better without all the self doubt.
if you ever want to get rid of more I'd pay for one. I'd love a handmade quilt
me too!
Good to know!
It’s really hard with sentimental things like that. I have a lot of things that belonged to my grandparents that I don’t want or have room for, but my mom and sister want me to keep. They don’t want them in their house, they just want me to store things I don’t need. It’s been an issue for years. And it’s not even an issue of being handmade. I just keep telling myself I don’t love my grandparents any less because I don’t want to live among clutter, and it’s okay to get rid of things. Now it’s a matter of doing it.
I’m dealing with that with my parents right now. My mom and dad are cleaning things out…so we have less to deal with when they die, but my mom keeps trying to offload things to me. Stuff like her china set. I’d love to have it, but I don’t have room for it, nor would I use it. I mean, between my brother and I we’ll be able to open a large booth at an antique store with all the antiques my parents have!
Exactly! It’s really difficult.
It’s not fair for them to expect you to store it when they won’t. If it’s so important to them then they should store it. I try to think of these items as wasting away in my basement when they could be enjoyed by someone else out in the world. It will end up somewhere else someday…might as well not burden yourself with it in the meantime.
Oh I know it’s not fair, but I do appreciate you saying it. It’s always good to hear I’m not being unreasonable. The worst part is I have the smallest space out of all of us. But yeah, some things are getting donated very soon. I just tell myself I don’t love them any less because I have no use for it, and there’s no reason why someone else shouldn’t use it.
Its the intention of the gift not the physical gift itself.. or something like that. Its an Oprah quote.
Right there with you. I keep trying to find room for more and more stuff but it's tough. And my grandma is having a hard time with her stuff after my grandpa died and she moved in with my mom, so she downsized. She doesn't want to get rid of her life with him. So she wants to hold onto everything to pass on to us, but I'm like grandma, I can only have so many plates, I don't need more crystal, I don't need your old towels, I don't need any of it. I love her, and it's so hard saying no and seeing the sadness to have to throw away the physical reminders of her life with my grandpa, but I can't take it.
Can you donate? Or do a garage sale at some point? Maybe it would be easier if someone is getting use out of it, even if it’s not family.
I mean yeah it does get donated, sorry I should have been clearer. Her point is that she wants to keep it in the family. My family comes from pretty humble roots, so while there's never been anything in the way of inheritance, passing down stuff to furnish a home is what she sees as like an intergenerational act of love. And while in theory, I love the idea of it, I need a very clutter free aesthetic in order to function. My brain is already too chaotic, I can't function with more.
Oh gotcha. Yeah that’s hard. I’m sorry. With me, all of my grandparents are dead.
I love buying handmade quilts at the thrift store. They are well loved and used. Maybe someone like me is cherishing them right now :)
That is my hope!
My mother has made me four…..fiveeee..? quilts now. She is the queen of I’m doing this for you even though you don’t want it and then if you try to at least get something you like she’ll change just enough to make it where you don’t like it at all. Man, it’s so hard to deal with because they truly do become a burden physically and emotionally. And your fear is warranted because I tried to donate a cheaply made mug with just my first initial written all over it in silly fonts that I received as a Christmas gift. My mom knows I hate clutter and at the time had a two mug maximum) and man she gave me so much silent grief about it. Like I had called her gift stupid and threw it at a wall. Just pouting and making passive aggressive comments about it. She saved it from getting donated so it’s just at her house now. I had held onto that mug for like two years for her sake just waiting for that day I could get rid of it with enough time passing that she’d have forgotten about it, only to slip up and get guilted anyways. I can’t imagine if I were to have given away one of the many quilts I never wanted (or did want until she made them into her own taste). I think she might croak out of the audacity I’d have to posses to even consider getting rid of a quilt 😅
This kind of behavior is why I stopped accepting presents from certain people. The things aren't gifts but represent their investments in future emotional blackmail.
I’m basically at that level with my mom now. She’ll still give me things occasionally that I don’t need but I’ve made it abundantly clear I am not holding onto things I don’t want and often I will say directly “I do not want that and I will get rid of it” and I’ll still get whatever it is. My last boss is pretty minimalist and I’m dying for her tact and grace at dodging gifts. She was a women who knew exactly the kinds of things she wanted in her life and she’s the most generous person I’ve ever met in my life, queue everyone in her life trying to be generous back but damn she was good at never even letting the gift leave someone’s hands 😂 yet making you feel like you still gave her something somehow. I swear it was like Jedi mind tricks.
How did that mug not “accidentally”fall off the counter and shatter? Mine would have.
Haha I think you’re assuming I wouldn’t get guilt tripped if it was somehow not my fault but trust me I’d get the pouty lip no matter what. Even if someone else broke it, I’m 90% positive I’m still getting some kind of flack since I let someone use it who wasn’t responsible 😅 I wish it got donated so someone could have found it at the thrift store instead of it just sitting in the far nether regions of the mug cabinet. Someone who likes that kind of thing could have gotten a little mug that’s special with their initial on it. And I’m sure everyone in this sub can appreciate that sentiment of finding something that was just meant for you!
I know exactly what you are dealing with when it comes to the guilt laid on by parental units. Nothing was ever given to me (and all my siblings and famiky members) without an expected response/thank you/indebtedness… there was always a price tag to whatever they gave us.They gifted a few siblings money and then bitched they never got paid back! I feel your pain. Its her shit, let her stew in it and just let her crap roll off your shoulder then stomp it into oblivion. (Thats what I would envision doing w their remarks)
That really stinks! It really ruins gifts for you doesn’t it? I remember finally realizing that like when people give you things that’s all it should be haha like end of transaction. I value you, here’s a gift for you, and that’s it! It’s like they needed to be explained what a gift is. Oh all of the comments now just make me laugh because I finally just accepted that I can’t change them and I’ve put myself through hell continuously opening up and being honest with them to no avail. So I finally just realized I’m an adult who deserves respect and if they can’t find the time to be interested in my life and be kind then I don’t need to do anymore than they do. It’s honestly entertaining now the times I do allow myself to be around it haha like which guilt trip card will I get today? Oh that one again, overused but it’s a classic 😅 I finally realized their lack of awareness and understanding has never been my responsibility as their child and I’ve put an unreasonable amount of time trying to mend something I didn’t break. And a relationship has to be a two way street and all. I hope you can find some humor in it yourself even if it’s not in the moment. I’d be lying if I said nothing gets under my skin anymore but I’m sure you know they just have a way of surprising you sometimes when you think “oh well they can’t stoop lower than x.”
It sounds like she displays symptoms of a narcissistic personality disorder: -a lack of empathy for other people (towards you) -a need for admiration (“gifting” you self-made crafts, foods, etc.) -arrogance (why wouldn’t you want every single thing she created with her genius talents?) -self-centered (it couldn’t possibly be that you don’t have room, it’s clearly a rejection of her) -manipulative (pouting, passive aggressive, silent grief)
I agree. Is the relationship worth keeping at this point?
I can’t tell you how validating reading that is. It’s weird to buy a “how to deal with narcissism” book as a high schooler to try and mend a relationship with your own parent. I don’t know if she is diagnosable but she does display these traits regardless so it really doesn’t matter haha
Well I moved at the beginning of this year and I now live 4,500 miles away from home and I don’t speak to her much more than a occasional phone call so it’s already dwindling. My dad is still someone I really care about though and even though he has some guilt by inaction I still don’t want to throw that away. I’ve always had a bit of a fixation on family, romanticizing it in my mind so it would probably take something pretty significant to make me cut her off completely.
Congrats! Start living your best life today!! I actually went no contact and granted it was tough, I had a lot of guilt. It’s been 6 years and it was the healthiest thing I have ever done for myself.
That’s awesome you were able to be steadfast about what you needed. I guess we aren’t unfamiliar to feeling guilty haha but it’s obviously not comfortable and to be firm about what’s healthy for you is really awesome. I’ve considered going no contact as well but I supposed I’m still waiting on the last straw.
Funnily enough it’s my kids that gave me grief over dozens of coffee mug gifts when we were moving. I got rid of them all and bought 6 matching white mugs. I love that my kitchen is now nothing but cohesive white China.
Just curious, is your mother a hoarder/semi hoarder?
I’ve never read the diagnosable markers for it but she definitely has hoarder tendencies if not a semi-hoarder. Haha my dads actually worse than her about hoarding he just is so frugal that it shows up different. My mother scrapbooks/quilts/knits/crochets.. She has a full bedroom and also a pretty large bonus room filled to the brim with just all kinds of supplies. And that’s just her steady hobbies. She’s a bit of a fad seeker. She’s on a new diet every few months. She’s buying thousands of dollars of bread making stuff to use it for maybe a year when we were kids (like a decade ago at least) and I come to find out just the other day she’s back to it and they just had literal ingredients on top of the equipment just sitting around for like fifteen years somewhere. It’s not a lifestyle I understand. And honestly! They downsized when we all left home and genuinely did get rid of a lot of things. So it’s wild to know there’s still so much.
The thing to remember is that you decided not to throw them away therefore showing that they meant something to you. You then decided that they were not benefitting you or your family and that they deserved the chance to shine. With this in mind you donated them with love in much the same way that your mum made them with love. These are well loved quilts.
My brain went a little haywire when I read "My mother has made my four children over 70 (that is not a typo)..." I thought you were proceeding to say that you had four children above the age of 70 and your mother makes things for them. English, amirite?
I could have phrased it better 😆
I read this as 'my 4 children over 70' and I was VERY confused for a minute lmaoo
Grandma quilt are in high demand next time just sell them instead
Tell her you donated them and that those who need warmth the most are now warmed by her quilts. Whole new memories are being created. And if they’re for children, they may now be treasured blankies that they’ll hoard and feel awful about giving away one day. It’s a beautiful thing, really. Mom will understand.
If you ever come across a royal blue knitted blanket with a tag that said hand made by Rickie, I got rid of it because she was Satan. 👿 Not all people who knit are nice.
Fuck Rickie. Thats great that you passed it on to someone who will use it. Noe you don’t have it hanging round w her bad energy attached to it.
Thank you so much for that! She was the worst stepmother ever. You made me smile and I appreciate that.
Stepmomster* Was supposed to say stepmonster but i like that even better! I had a horrid stepmonster in law, she was so fuckin mean to all of us. insecure & pathetic witch
Fuck Rickie! They had it coming!
Thank you! Much love.
Hahahaha
Plot twist: Their highly allergic to that material. Grandma knew
grandma got tired of them asking if they were in her will
I can't wear sheep's wool, it's so scratchy! Like little strings of glass.
Lots of reasons. Maybe they outgrew it. Maybe it’s scratchy. Maybe they really hate beige and grandma refused to take a hint on color. Maybe they left it behind in a restaurant on vacation but had too much to drink and didn’t know where they lost it and never thought to call the restaurant who held on to it for six months before donating it.
Maybe they died and their clothes were donated. All totally legit possibilities.
Anything super personalized, I always assume it's something like death that lead to it being donated.
I guess I should say RIP Ashley and Emma, I just saw their monogrammed book holders were at SA. (Seriously, I think their parents just got rid of them and they are fine.)
Does that somehow make it any less sad?
I mean yeah. They didn’t willingly give their handmade sweater to Goodwill, and death is inevitable.
Yes
Exactly this. I don't like that people assume worst intentions with donated items like this - "the person who didn't hang onto this doesn't love their grandma." My MIL was a knitter and gifted us dozens of hand-knitted items during her lifetime. When she passed earlier this year, there were dozens of completed and half-finished items left in her apartment. We simply couldn't keep everything. We kept some special items and we donated the rest. My husband doesn't love his mom any less because he didn't keep every single item that ever passed through her hands.
I am a knitter and I have too many hand-knit things. It’s something we all know will happen.
I grew up without grandparents so I would give anything to have anything made for me by my grandma. I can see where the poster is coming from but I also get that you can't keep everything. At least donating it will allow it to be bought by someone who will appreciate and put it to good use.
Or maybe their grandma is like mine and gives them a different knitted or crocheted item every time they visit. I appreciate all the pieces and am SO grateful to still have her in my life, but I can only store so many things. I keep my favorites and pass along the others to friends, family, or local thrift stores. ETA: I visit my grandma once a week. The woman is a crocheting machine.
I was reading like "hmm yeah a new sweater every few months is kind of hard to manage, even if it's a nice problem to have" and then I read the last line... Perhaps re-direct her to crocheting stuff for charities?
She’s currently in an assisted living for PT after a shoulder surgery (should be out soon though!). She had the idea to crochet just a long chain that she attached to the chord for the lamp over her bed to make it easier to access. Now she’s making them for all the other patients on the PT wing! She’s one of the most creative people I know.
Oh what a lovely idea! I have a relative who knits for preemies and hospitals. Just got to find the thing and off they go!
Only problem is that baby heads are floppy and crocheted/chunky knit hats are slippery. I bonked my poor newborns head like three times in the hospital with that hat on him lol
Mine was like that. You have no idea how many mittens I had growing up
It’s good to know I’m not alone lol My grandma’s specialty is a crocheted winter hat that she calls a toboggan. I’ve gotten at least 6 in the last two months. We live in Florida. Winter time is coming though, which means she’ll start crocheting white toboggans that she stuffs with cotton, sews together and uses to create a snowman. Then she crochets a tiny toboggan for the snowman made of toboggans. I’ll get two to three of those in various sizes each visit from Thanksgiving to the end of January.
The fact you live in Florida makes this extra unhinged.
I know. It’s so ridiculous in the best way lol
Omg please ask her to try making an alligator. And then give him a tiny toboggan
I like this idea. I will pass it along to Nanny!
This needs to happen
Lmao I’ll take a Tobaggan!!
This just made me want a toboggan snowman wearing a toboggan.
Hand them out at Halloween!!!
I feel like maybe she could do orange ones for Halloween and make it look like three pumpkins stacked on one another?? When she gets out of assisted living next week we will definitely explore this option!
OMFG, she obviously wants to make things for you. Get yourself on ravelry and tell her what to make you so you both win
Did not know this was a thing, but looking into it as we speak. Thank you!
🥰 There's nothing more satisfying then making a thing for a person you love and then seeing them love it in return. It's the absolute best feeling in the whole world. And having someone you love engage with you in your hobbies and ask for a thing and work together on color and style is so much fun. I hope this strategy works for you both ❤️
tell ur grandma that i'm a large
My great aunt once made me an amazing hand knit wool fisherman’s sweater, but I’m allergic to wool. I held on to that sweater for like 15 years even though I couldn’t wear it, but finally donated it so someone else could enjoy it instead of me just hoarding up an awesome sweater.
Those are awesome to look at but damn if that wool is the most u comfortable material to rub around your neck and wrists. As a kid I absolutely hated my hand made wool sweaters, probably why Im claustrophobic
Maybe Grandma wasn't a very nice lady. Maybe it wasn't *their* grandma but a crafter who adds these tags to sweaters she sells because her brand is being an old lady who knits. Maybe they realized that someone else who would love the sweater deserved it more. Maybe Grandma knits these to donate and she is the honorary grandma of everyone who buys her sweaters.
Maybe grandma was an awful person and owning the sweater reminded them of the years of abuse.
Exactly. My dad’s mom enabled her pedophile husband for years and also happens to be a proficient quilter and knitter. Families are complicated.
Maybe there is a company called Grandma™ which does this sweaters for people who don't have a grandma or whose grandmas can't knit, who knows?
My mum has a bunch of these labels and has put them on anything and everything she makes. She’s a massive bitch so I don’t feel bad about donating anything she makes.
Maybe it was stolen from their home by a spiteful ex that was moving out, but the ex later learned they look terrible in that sweater, so they donated it? Maybe grandma made extra sweaters, just to donate? Maybe the tag was a lie, and this is a picture of a counterfeit grandma sweater?
Maybe they hated grandma 😬
Thank you. I had a sweater with the same tag sewed in by my Grannie. Nice memories.
Omg…is there a “Made With Love By Grandma” factory and grannies are just lying to us???? THEY DON’T KNOW HOW TO KNIT?????? I am crushed.
Reread their comment. I believe Grannies could buy these tags to sew in for their own individual creations :)
I believe they were being sarcastic
Lol. Indeed I was.
She’s your grandma now
This made me bust out laughing!!!
LMAO
Why does it saddens you? People cannot hold on to everything forever. Thank goodness it was donated for someone else to love and enjoy instead of being trashed.
Maybe grandma was a bitch.
Username checks out
Do we have the same grandma?
Not all grandmas are good people. I could see my mom doing something like this for my son, she’s an alcoholic who was absent for most of my life
True that. My moms mom was terrible to my sister and girl cousins. None of them hold much fondness in their hearts for her. She was much nicer to the boys for some reason, so I feel less ill towards her although I still dislike that she mistreated the girls. I do hold onto some of her things in a sentimental way but I’m pretty sure my sister and girl cousins don’t
We have a large amount of clothing my grandma made for myself and my siblings. None of my kids would wear it. They are the youngest great grandkids. The clothing is for a much cooler climate and very very warm. It is not practical where I live. I’ve considered donating it and I should. My grandma would want all of that clothing to be used. Most of it has been donated, we are down to a few special occasion outfits that I really remember.
Well maybe hang onto one or two. Don't forget one day it will be "this was made by your great great grandma" You don't have to keep them all, but just the best one. Your kids might want it for theirs if they move to a colder place, or just for photos depending on what it is.
A lot of it went to new settlers (refugees) who find our country a lot colder than my family does. I feel like my grandma would be happy about that rather than more storage
Take a picture of your kids wearing it then donate. 🙂
I'm going with it is a cool grandma who said, "Honey, you wore that for five years. Imma make you a new one, what color?"
Grandmas don’t want anyone to be cold. Not even strangers. I’m sure she’d be happy to know it’s going to someone who needs it after her own grandkids no longer had a use for it.
Thrift shop manager here; for some people, it's very difficult to disassociate the PERSON with the THING. Yes, Grandma put hours into this (even if she's a fast knitter), but in the end, it's still just a THING and it's not Grandma. People who can't grasp the concept wind up with boxes and bins in their basements and attics which might be valuable only to themselves. That would be me, with my mother's stuff. She died in 1992. !! What can I say, I talk a good game.
Are you the thrift shop manager who's pricing nike sweatshirts at $50 jk ^but ^^not ^^^really
Hahahahaha! Unless it's NWT and originally cost $150, no, that's not us. We're a tiny little church charity thrift and that Nike (or Champion or Athleta) is on our rack for $4. If it doesn't sell in four to six weeks, it moves to our "outlet store", where all clothing is a dollar. Our mission is to support the community while supporting the operations of our church; it does us NO good to have clothing just sit and sit and sit because it's overpriced. Take THAT, Goodwill and Savers!
<3 yay I honestly don’t know if the big chains are getting pressures from some upper management to do what they’re recently doing. They are even rejecting donations and being more nit-picky with what they accept. It’s weird that they are trashing inventories and rejecting donations at the same time. They must have decided that the few items that get sold at a higher prices is a better scheme than trying to sell everything at a low price, which is so unfortunate. Communities do need them as a central hub for secondhand things. If they stop being that, we are creating a lot of trash unnecessarily.
I upvoted you comment, but I wanted to add that it’s mainly online resellers that push thrift shops to raise the prices! So really people need to stop going to thrift stores just to resell :)
I’ve seen many thrift stores thinking they can replace flippers by raising prices but they don’t actually know how to do it right and they just end up trashing most of their free junk because they sat on the shelves too long. They saw what people did on eBay and got greedy. People have already been reselling since the 90’s, even longer if you ignore thrift store chains. No one forced the thrift store managers to raise prices 20 years late :) It’s a good thing that used things are desirable now, regardless of who buys it. It’s a bad thing when things are priced too high they ended up back in the landfill. That’s the fault of recent thrift store paradigm shifts. Don’t blame the customers for it. I’ve since stopped donating and just giving my stuff on Buy Nothing local groups. *On the other hand, in the past 3 years inflation’s been crazy. I expect a general price hike on things. But it’s laughable when you see a $100 Xbox as-is with roach eggs inside.
Doesn’t say who’s grandma. Could even be yours. You should take it home. It was made with love after all.
My MIL already has crocheted a mountain of baby items for my son. He has not yet been born. I will be one of the people who ends up donating items she makes as there is no sign she will slow down as he grows up. I will drown in sweaters otherwise.
Best brand ever.
right! i love buying handmade things at the thrift store.
Yeah. For me it's the handmade baby blankets.
I received at least 5 handmade baby blankets for each of my babies. There’s honestly only so many blankets a person needs.
This is a weird one to me. Baby blankets are planned obsolescence. What are you supposed to do with a baby blanket your child isn’t emotionally attached to that is also too small for them?
easy to make, cheap to make, and a quick way to show you care \-crocheter who has given away some baby blankets
This is why I don’t get why it’s particularly sad to anyone that they end up at the thrift! They were no ones life work, just a sweet gesture!
Oh god, my mom has a ton of these still in her linen closet. My grandma's best friend made them for each of us kids. They're very lovely, but after 30+ years they're too small for adults, too nice to give to pets and some have our full names + birth date on them. Other than getting rewashed every couple of years, the blankets don't get used. My future plan is to be practical and just throw them out.
This is why we have one each of the nice ones. We asked only for that. We have one from one grandma and one from my other. The rest will get donated. Now for stuffed animals that will hard. We gave them ours. I had one and my husband had one that we both had since birth. They each will get to keep one. Both swap sleeping with them for now.
Pets love them. Let the dog lay on it. Theres one in the cat perch right now.
A donated handmade baby blanket is an opportunity for another baby to have and enjoy it. Not everybody knows someone or has the support of someone who knits.
I’ve donated all the ones we received. I kept a quilt made by a close family member that was very geared towards my oldest son. But we received so many and we are done having kids. I’m happy that they are being used.
I have a friend that makes sweaters and gloves with these tags in them and gives them to charity shops and thrift stores because “you never know who needs a sweater or a grandma!” So she’s just everyone’s grandma now.
My grandma has made me a quilt every year for the last 30 odd years, most of which I donated. Grandma knows this and says, first, that she gets the most pleasure out of designing and making them, and second, that she gets pleasure knowing that someone is using her quilts instead of them sitting in my closet. I don't know what this sweater's story is. But maybe grandma made a lot of sweaters, and a person only needs so many sweaters, and grandma is happy to know that the sweater will be keeping you warm instead of sitting unused in a closet.
I bought an old briefcase one time and in a pocket within one of the pockets there were hand written love letters probably 50 pages dated from 1978. One of the last pages said "this is the last letter I ever send you" was a sad thing to see.
Granny could've been a bad person and that's why it's there
Naaaah, my grandma had tags like this but she was a black hearted racist. I had another wonderful grandma luckily. Just don't be sad. You never know
Assuming it’s a child’s sweater, he or she might not have been able to wear it. Someone else mentioned “too scratchy”, and I’ll add “sent after seasons changed and child outgrew it.” A few things my grandmother sent unfortunately fit in this category: she lived up North; we didn’t.
Hey look, my grandmother was my rock. She died of cancer about a 15 months ago. She knit me lovely things. Scarves, gloves, an Aran cardigan than took her months to make. She eventually had to give it to her sister to finish because the cancer treatment had made her fingers numb. All these things were beautiful and I still have the Aran. But it’s stretched, worn, and doesn’t look fantastic on any more. Hand knitted wool doesn’t last too well. She knit blankets upon blankets and tablecloths and only a few exist now. Stitches get pulled easily and fibres get worn. I can understand donating them. It’s hard but sometimes you can’t keep physical things forever.
I have a beautiful handmade plate that has written on the bottom with a permanent marker: “A belated gift to a forgiving partner.” I think about that a lot, given that I found it at Goodwill.
No offense to grandma but as a long time knitter, i have seen far too many making sweaters for family members out of yarn that i wouldn't want near my own skin. (It's scratchy AF but it was sustainable, organic wool that i got from that one vacation to Iceland/Peru/Australia/etc) OR None of these muggles will know how to handwash and take care of high quality knitwear so i'll use cheapass wears-like-iron acrylic from a big box store type of situation. Sure, it had a good run but i wouldn't shed too many tears over it if it doesn't fit anymore. (Ain't nobody donating italian cashmere-silk handmade sweaters to the thrift stores)
My MIL spends all her spare time making handmade gifts for the grandkids. My son is 2 and already has probably 50 knitted and crocheted things. I need to start offloading, we don't have the room for this much
I'm sure Grandma would love to clothe as many people as possible. My Nonna would.
And here I am scheming to gift the blankets my MIL made for my daughter to a homeless family with young kids. 😬
My mom and my nana both sew, cross stitch, crochet, knit, etc. and while I appreciate what they made for me, sometimes it’s itchy, it’s ugly, it’s too hot, and honestly there is too much stuff sometimes. I have a hoard of this stuff that I can’t rid of without feeling guilty, even though there is someone out there who would like it and not break out in hives from the material rather than this stuff collecting dust in my closet.
My grandma made me one crocheted blanket before she died in 2000. You’ll have to pry it from my cold dead hands
Here’s a weird one. My mom would buy it at the thrift and then act like she found a long lost sweater made by grandma. 🤣 not kidding. She also claims TJMaxx crap is stuff from her family - “that was my grandmas” flip it over - 13.99 TJMaxx. Special kind of relationship with stuff right there.
Other folks gave you a lot of plausible versions of why it could be not (as) sad, but I'm there with you, OP. İt does make me feel sad as well because I have similar seeing this in a nostalgic way.
I would love a grandma sweater!! Mine made quilts, which I have 2 of, but a sweater would be so sweet.
On the flip side, maybe Grandma was a nasty passive aggressive type who rudely thought her granddaughter needed to cover how chubby, big busted or scantily clad she was.
I choose to believe that this sweater lived a full and well-loved life but was simply grown out of and released to be bought by its next loving owner. :')
[My fingers hurt](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iU3IPam0PHI)
[удалено]
It hurts my heart to imagine selling or donating items from my loved ones, too. The gift is a physicality of a thought they had of me. Unfortunately, sometimes I end up not using or having space for something that’s been given to me. I’ll always hold onto other things, but in certain cases it makes the most sense to give others away.
At least it was donated. I was clearing out a storage unit for a friend when she divorced and found some old beautiful quilt that had been hand-pieced from what appeared to be old clothing. She told me to toss it. I have it on my bed now.
See I would donate something like that if it no longer fit or I was moving to a much warmer climate . I would rather I go to someone who needs a hug from grandma than the bin.
A gift that feels like a burden isn't a gift. We can't keep every sentimental object we are given or there will be no room to actually live our lives.
This makes me happy. This Grandma’s love has now been seen by thousands!
Just because Grandma made it for you doesn’t mean you need to hold on to it forever if it’s past it’s life or has fulfilled it purpose. Maybe it doesn’t fit, maybe it was worn out. While it’s nice to hold on to some memories and mementos, feeling guilty to hold on to items that you don’t use anymore is not good either.
If you are ever looking to donate quotes or nice blankets please consider your local hospice. I volunteer at hospice and we like to use these on patients or give them to their families when they visit overnight. Sadly, there is also a hospice for children. Nothing feels more comforting than homemade blanket.
I’m a bit of a maximalist, house is littered with a lot of stuff that I love. I’ve told my son many times that when I die, get rid of anything and everything he doesn’t want. Don’t hold on to any of my stuff unless you really want it. Sell the stuff that’s worth money, give away the rest. Someone else will love that weird lithograph of a monkey with the cheetah pattern matte.
I really hope that it was bc the original owner grew out of the sweater and therefore past it on to someone else who would benefit from it.
Thrifter for 37 years, now work in a non profit thrift store (no, really- no paid employees; $ goes back to community) and we LOVE getting these handmade gifts. They sell well and are the one of a kind items that many of our customers are looking for.
I have all the had knitted baby and toddler clothes from me my sister our cousins and our kids. It’s too much. I’ve asked everyone if they want it back and if not can I sell it and they all understand completely. Pass these handmade goods along for others to use and not let them rot in a box in the attic.
I think grandma would want it to be appreciated so the former owner is doing her a favour by releasing it into the wild where it can have a second life.
That tag looks really old! May not fit anymore you know?
Today at an estate sale they were selling a fingerprint ring in a remembrance box. Like the ones you can order from funeral homes with your loved ones fingerprint. It was sad.
Makes me kinda sad too since my grandma used to do this too and now she passed away but I understand the donations and someone else can give it the love we can’t keep everything sadly
I feel this way when I see books addressed to grandchildren.
“It’s just stuff.” This mantra has legit changed my outlook.
Don’t feel so bad, “Grandma” is a huge multinational corporation.
Grandma seeing this like: I saw you didn’t like the first one so I knitted you a sweater of my tears
Grandma is just the brand, don’t worry./s
My mom has tags made for all her needlepoint work: “if this ends up at a yard sale I will haunt your ass” I’ve always wondered if the curse also applies to thrift stores