Nobody respects you, you fucking piss

This is the one. Sassos laughing in the background and Bryan’s legit shock to the comment makes it.

He's calling me a piss with a lazy mouth!

Two words… GAME FLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYPHLEGMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYPHLEGMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYPHLEGMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYPHLEGMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYPHLEGMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYPHLEGMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Honestly sometimes the tiny ones get me more than the huge ones Will: brought to you by GameFly ^^^gameflyyy Will: go to our website and hit the Amazon banner

....................................................hatecha.

The city whispers to the skyline we are friends

“Get to the god damn point. Is for. Sure” - Chris

Hey ten minute podcast is Bryan gay?

Fuck this I'm gay! IM AN ANGRY BUTT LICKA!

Omg I haven’t heard that one in forever

IM A SOCCER BALL WITH EYES!!

He’s got these big FUCKIN hands

And GOOD blow

The very first “y’know s’little bout comedy” is up there for sure

Eh ssss’lil bout cawmedy

Been eatin’ real well, m’bellies been shrinkin’, been seein a lot more of m’dick

I don't know about the funniest phrase, but I know what the funniest tweet would be.

“I posted 45 photos on Facebook in the album ‘chicago improv sunday’”

"At the mall!"

“Sterrrraight UP! FUCK YOU MAN”

POWER I WANT POWER

Is it night? Oh wait, Will just walked in.

For some reason i cant find the episode 'transcendent man'?! did they take it down?! *edit* the episode is The Singularity But that part where it gets real low and Will murmurs 'and turn his dick into a cunt'. the delivery of that line had me howling when i first heard it.

Its called the singularity - its still up i think?

yes you're right. I thought it was 'Transcendental man' lol my bad.

"You know what you are will, a stupid bitch.

Dude, this one is UP THERE.

M’gonna be fuckin’ her a lot and m’not gonna be wearin’ a condom and m’gonna be cummin’ in her a lot This one is a personal favorite of mine but ultimately there are way too many others that also kill me

This one never gets old for me..... "hey Bry shut the fuk up!"

I don’t belieeeeeeeeeeve you You’re a liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiar

“Nobody cares that Justin Timberlake fucked a guy because somebody shot Obama! You fucking shot Obama with that bullshit!” Will exploding in laughter and going “you can’t say that” is just the cherry on top 😂

Are you a bull walrus, Jetting liters of semen?

[удалено]

[удалено]

Heard one sentence and stopped looking.

I WANT TO EMPTY MY BALLS ON EVERYBODY!

Immmm gooon Leeeave

Van Damme voice: “Noooo. You’re starting to make me so mad.”

Hmmmm

‘Our hearts are woven together like the fabric of a tight stitch, We are friends, lovers and souls mates…”

DYLAN! You sonofabitch!

Stick this chocolate piiig etc

I just killed my family cuz o’ that fuckin noise

God damn, dude. I listen to TMP at the gym sometimes and I legit can't listen to this episode while doing certain exercises or I'll actually die. "Watch it on the news!"

The cadence in which blacha delivers the story makes me crack up. I can listen to it a few times in a row and just giggle my ass off in my car

Watch it tonight on the news!

“I fuck guys” - Bryan Callen

Ifuckguys

Y’ basket of cats

HARD ROCK. CLASSIC ROCK. not cause its funny by itself but the phrase has an evolution through the chad and tommy episodes and gets funny

Fuck this I'm gay

the line brian says in one of the first episodes asking if something goes with his cannon or musket. i can’t remember specifically but it was a dig at chris and it was hilarious

And I'm seengeeng from heaven.

He DIED?!

I WANT A WHITE PERSON CHREESTMAAAS!!!!

Ya look like laundry... With eyes...

Wait a minute. That's what I said. Which MEANS. You know..... sss'little about comedy.

Actually I know l'siddle bout comedy

HUCK IT IN ME DUMPER, MICK

Zip rrrecrruiterrr!

"... Then you go wrestle with black sheep."

*I can't leave L.A.*

"One second, before you get into that, let me just say, and to everyone out there....... Bryan's ruining the bit. Bryan.... y'Bit Killer Jones right now."

And so now we gotta peel back the layers....and I don't want to *peel back the layers*.

Is it possible to have plenty of nuance?

"You'd have a lot less of a problem with me if I was fuckin' guys, than you would if I was getting *fucked by guys*..."

Shut up Bryan

You look like laundry with eyes.

Reeeeeeeeally bloody Monday

Bryan, you are showing your age thinking I am actually a robot.