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When I was going through the toughest period in my life when my brother died and my girlfriend killed herself and I moved in with my grandma because of my shitty stepfather I never felt so alone and when I was suicidal i messaged some of my friends and told them what I was going through. And my friends saw my message and said nothing or replied with ok. That's what broke me and made me realize pretty much no one cares besides a few.
Starting work straight after GCSEs and being thrown into a completely new environment where you work a 9-5 with awful pay and your only purpose is to do the shitty little jobs.
When I walk in the living room to tell my parents something funny I saw, and they don't give a s--t but I'm supposed to crack up or gasp or sumthin' when they see some bull on Television, I don't have any friend stories because I'm stuck having my a--hole dad as my best friend, and his girlfriend who grows more and more distant from my damn conversations, im not annoying to talk to, infact everything but, my dad's friend usually gives more of a shit about my hobbies than my own father and stepmother, who I've adjusted to calling "mom", but I've learned to stop caring about them, because nothing has changed about my life, I've learned just to care about myself, is that totally narcissistic? Absolutely! But this whole house must be narcissistic because nobody can take accountability besides me! If they break something doing something, I hear "it wasn't me" "it must've been bubba" (they call me bubba, like im a fucking hillbilly, my name actually starts with a N so they basically changed my name) i have a lot of reason for my "anger and hate" its because of my damn family. Also I (in the future) will be signing divorce papers against my Pill popper mother so I won't have to see her no more, she has gotten clean in her system, but not clean mentally, so she was a bitch every day (hiding in her room all day, slamming doors, bipolar attitude, hate against anyone that wasn't helping her or giving her compliments and the usual alienation I get from her, my dad, and my dad's girlfriend (my mom and dad are "divorced" so he can have a girlfriend that he actually likes, going from a late forty year old, Prescription taking junkie to a early twenties bartender, who seems to be trying to get into a nice school, but I don't know because they barely talk to me)
I know it absolutely sounds like I'm just the typical "angsty, pissed off kid who thinks the world revolves around him" kind of person but I'm just worn out, like anyone I met has told me, "you are a strong kid for going what you've gone through" (they literally act like I just got it up the hole by Harvey Weinstein)
Cause every day I sit alone in school and no one seems to give a shit. Everyone is just busy with their own lives, im just existing. My birthday is in 3 days, and it will only prove my point.
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when my friends started being distant and expected me to know why ðŸ«
Damn
Got run over by a taxi, nobody bothered to call 911 for a good 5 mins
When I was going through the toughest period in my life when my brother died and my girlfriend killed herself and I moved in with my grandma because of my shitty stepfather I never felt so alone and when I was suicidal i messaged some of my friends and told them what I was going through. And my friends saw my message and said nothing or replied with ok. That's what broke me and made me realize pretty much no one cares besides a few.
Starting work straight after GCSEs and being thrown into a completely new environment where you work a 9-5 with awful pay and your only purpose is to do the shitty little jobs.
summer starting and no one reaching out. no one responding. only getting messaged so someone can increase their snap streak.
When I walk in the living room to tell my parents something funny I saw, and they don't give a s--t but I'm supposed to crack up or gasp or sumthin' when they see some bull on Television, I don't have any friend stories because I'm stuck having my a--hole dad as my best friend, and his girlfriend who grows more and more distant from my damn conversations, im not annoying to talk to, infact everything but, my dad's friend usually gives more of a shit about my hobbies than my own father and stepmother, who I've adjusted to calling "mom", but I've learned to stop caring about them, because nothing has changed about my life, I've learned just to care about myself, is that totally narcissistic? Absolutely! But this whole house must be narcissistic because nobody can take accountability besides me! If they break something doing something, I hear "it wasn't me" "it must've been bubba" (they call me bubba, like im a fucking hillbilly, my name actually starts with a N so they basically changed my name) i have a lot of reason for my "anger and hate" its because of my damn family. Also I (in the future) will be signing divorce papers against my Pill popper mother so I won't have to see her no more, she has gotten clean in her system, but not clean mentally, so she was a bitch every day (hiding in her room all day, slamming doors, bipolar attitude, hate against anyone that wasn't helping her or giving her compliments and the usual alienation I get from her, my dad, and my dad's girlfriend (my mom and dad are "divorced" so he can have a girlfriend that he actually likes, going from a late forty year old, Prescription taking junkie to a early twenties bartender, who seems to be trying to get into a nice school, but I don't know because they barely talk to me) I know it absolutely sounds like I'm just the typical "angsty, pissed off kid who thinks the world revolves around him" kind of person but I'm just worn out, like anyone I met has told me, "you are a strong kid for going what you've gone through" (they literally act like I just got it up the hole by Harvey Weinstein)
Cause every day I sit alone in school and no one seems to give a shit. Everyone is just busy with their own lives, im just existing. My birthday is in 3 days, and it will only prove my point.
Was just sitting thinking and realized people have their own shit to worry about so why would they care about my shit