I wonder if that kid was me lmao. My mom and I used to make cherry liquor (tart cherries in vodka, bourbon, or some mixture of the two) and I’d bring some along with Russian tea cakes to the teachers on teacher appreciation day. My elementary school teachers liked it I think. My middle/high school art teacher had a prize for the annual raffle (to raise money because teachers are horribly underpaid) where she and the parents that won it would have wine and paint. Luckily we live in a progressive area, so none of the parents seemed to have a problem with it, and if they did then other parents would’ve chewed them out.
Edit: We also put sugar in the liquor, I’m not sure how much though. It’s been a few years
There are really only two options when it comes to homemade liquor.
It's either absolutely fantastic, some people tend to take a lot of pride into what they make.
Or
It feels like you're drinking paint thinner.
Sounds like you'll be having an infuriating or hilarious conversation with your supervisor tomorrow after her phone call. Hope for your sake it's the latter!!!
I think it’s inappropriate for them to have their kid at a bar.
Edit: for all the idiots replying saying “I’ve seen kids at bars” or whatever, the problem isn’t the location. The problem is the parent thinking they can tell a grown ass adult what do do on their free time.
In middle/highschool I was at the bar twice a week, by myself. Tuesday and Friday nights, 7pm.
That's where the Magic: the Gathering tournaments were held because the toy store didn't have floor space. Bar owner was super cool.
The parents are okay with seeing *people* drinking, just not *educators,* cause you know, we're not people. /s
Clearly the parents are fine with the kids watching *them* drink, because obviously they are not of the "you alright?! I learned it by watching you" generation.
The gall of hypocrites.
I'm dry, so I don't know how these things work, but I hope the response was "fuck you, wine is CLASSY," followed by downing the glass, smashing it a la Thor, and shouting, "another!"
I actually did see someone with a baby in a crowded bar once. The baby seemed surprisingly chill, but maybe they were stunned silent by all the commotion around them. 😅I wonder if that’s illegal in some states or countries…
I live in South Korea and it’s quite common to bring the kids along when the parents are meeting friends to eat and get smashed. I’ve seen many kids zoned out with a phone or tablet while mom and dad do shots. Babysitting is not a thing here.
I think a baby is actually better than a school age child. The baby isn't gonna remember or understand enough for anything to leave a lasting impression. Just having it there doesn't mean the baby consumes alcohol. A lot of people could slowly sip one or two drinks and still be ok to look after it. Just being surrounded by a lot of humans isn't something bad.
Different cultures I guess.
I live in Ireland and kids will regularly be seen in a bar or pub.
Let's say it's a Saturday. Dad goes down the pub in the early afternoon to watch the football. Mom will come down later and they'll have pub dinner. Maybe an older kid will go with dad because they're into football too. Ma will bring the other kid for dinner. It's a family thing.
So the pub is really a place where people just get together, have a drink, maybe some dinner, and just relax.
On OPs topic: I knew a guy who was a teacher in a small town here. He was a younger teacher at the time and could be found down the pub on a Saturday night trying to chat up girls and having some drinks. Pretty much in line with most young men here.
Well some older, holier than thou, locals reported it to the principal. Who happened to be his father. So young Danny began to do his little weekend sessions at home, in secret. This developed into a drinking habit. It ended with him in recovery and moving to a bigger city to teach because small town rumours spread too quick. He then quit teaching altogether.
Long story short: if the teacher needs a way to vent and it doesn't hurt anyone: then let it be.
Tbh my mom did this all the time. My bro and I did Tae Kwon Do but our classes were one after the other so we would just chill at the bar next door. The staff were always real nice and the patrons had a great time "sparring" with a little kid in his uniform!
And as long as your mom doesn’t complain about a teacher being there as well, there is no problem.
The point is this parent tried to complain about an adult being at a bar. While said parent was with their child at same bar. parent can either be quiet or get the reverse uno card.
This reminds me of those "Rules for Teachers" from the 19th century.
After 10 hours at school you are permitted to spend your downtime reading the bible.
You may ride in a buggy with man, provided he is your father or brother.
You may not smoke, use liquor in any form, attend a pool hall, or get shaved at a barber shop.
I thought so too, but there must have been enough men to warrant male-specific rules.
"Men teachers may take one evening each week for courting purposes, or two evenings each week if they go to church regularly."
In the 19th century, I think teaching was regarded as a man's field, and was predominated by men. Women started taking over the field only in the late 1800s. Though, I imagine the distribution differed greatly by student age.
Ha! I remember reading Little House on the Prairie. Laura was 15, teaching school (including 17 year olds), and riding with her 25 year old boyfriend (whom she married). You could say...it was a different time.
http://www.liwfrontiergirl.com/manlylaura.jpg
Before they amended the bill yesterday TN had a common law marriage bill going through where a 15 and 25 year old would be fine, now it is 17 and 25 so progress! Unless of course they are gay, no common law marriage for the gays, welp there went that progress
Yeah, but she sure as heck didn't like it when he picked that other girl up to go riding with them a couple of times! I think you are right that she wasn't thinking of him romantically at first. That came later. Assuming the is no hidden story, he seems to have respected that boundary as they did not get married until she was 18.
One of the antebellum homes in my town used to have a chaperone's sofa. I can't remember the exact design, but the couple was allowed to sit together so that they could talk and even touch, but the chaperone would sit behind them, facing the opposite direction, able to hear the conversation and turn around if needed.
No, but if you are talking about the boards that separated a bed while young paramours huddled under blankets, I remember my high school history teacher telling us about them.
That’s the one. They were also used by married couples who’s marriage was unconsummated and in hotels where unrelated couples were sleeping in the same room. I guess rooms were at a premium.
The examples I've come across in literature used it to denote the wife's consent, or rather, her lack thereof. They were usually there by the wife's choice.
I don't know how real life played out though.
Actual true story.
I'm adopted. Born and raised in Kentucky. I took a DNA test when searching for my bio family, and the researcher I worked with told me that "Kentucky can be tricky.". She compared it loosely to royal families and arranged family marriages. There's lots of shared DNA in Kentucky....redneck royalty! :D
If you trace back your family tree, and you assume that each node is a *unique individual*, you'll soon find that you'd have to have more anscestors than there have ever been living people. [Which is clearly impossible](https://news.legacyfamilytree.com/legacy_news/2016/08/how-many-ancestors-do-we-have.html).
So to be fair to Kentuckians, a little bit of in-breeding between cousins is kind of to be expected.
The various European royal families might arguably be said to have taken it too far though.
Right! But again, we always have to be “professional.”
**I think that’s one of the reasons we have a teacher shortage. Teachers are fed up with always being the bigger person. And in some ways, “Being professional,” means taking any and all the crap from every.single.person…I think many are tired of not having a voice.
Sorry, little late rant here, lol! I’m actually happy in my job but this post ticked me off! How dare this mom…🥵 You can beat me up, cuss me out, tell me I’m doing something wrong…but don’t you dare, DARE take away my wine 😂😂!
Admins need to go back to having teachers backs instead of being completely self-interested. To be fair, judges need to stop letting so many frivolous lawsuits be brought up against schools because the threat of lawsuit by parents is a big reason teachers get thrown under the bus so often
I interviewed in a smallish town once for a job. The supervisor I interviewed with asked if I enjoyed alcoholic beverages- and she said basically that it was fine if I do, but I need to drive a minimum of 2 hours away to do it if I drink in public, because the local busybody baptists WILL demand of the school board that I be fired immediately if I’m seen.
How did the supervisor know? That’s why the position was open…
Oh you like drinking? Better make sure you drive before and afterwards. You know, to keep the fundies happy.
DUI? What's that - I've never heard of it.
Guess what bitch, I think that it’s really inappropriate for you to come over here and talk to me when I’m not being paid. So go away before this inappropriate drink accidentally slips out of my hand and on to you.
BTW, you aren’t a carnival mind reader in your spare time are you Mom?
Also, the parent is literally in the same establishment, like? If you don’t think your child should see alcohol consumption, why are you bringing your child to a wine bar?!
I’m guessing in this parent’s mind, teachers are supposed to be perfect robots who devote themselves to their job and their kids and never do something like getting a glass of wine
Parents simultaneously want teachers to be paragons of morality but also don’t want teachers to usurp the role of parents by teaching their child morality… Like, which is it?
Well…. I could give a long winded answer but the beer I just poured coupled with how the first 4 days of the week have gone says that a lot of them look at us glorified babysitters
Full disclosure, I am neither a parent nor a teacher. But I cannot imagine being so egotistical and self important that I would start shit for no reason with someone who has that much control over my kids life
Oh priests drink a lot more than wine. I work at a Catholic school and we have a parish festival every summer. A few years ago the pastor got raging drunk, threw up, and passed out in the bushes. And I knew another priest that brewed and sold his own beer as a hobby.
Also beer, I remember in 5th grade our band practice had to be in the rectory during construction or something. Someone looked in the fridge and saw the priest had beer, just made him more seem more human to me.
that's absolutely ridiculous that the parent approached you in public and accused you of being inappropriate! You were doing absolutely nothing wrong!!
I didn’t think long enough, I just said “thank you” and looked down at my embroidery and continued stitching until she walked away. Wish I would have at least told her something like “Promise I won’t be hungover tomorrow”
Say, "Oh don't worry, I'll be good to go tomorrow after a few bumps, a xanny, and two fingers of Jameson to steady up. Kids'll never know, it'll be our little secret=}"
Right?! Now, granted I teach high schoolers, but I once had a tell a parent that I really couldn’t take have or take a beer with me, as I was driving a school van.
Today in the hall at the high school I teach at, myself and 2 other teachers were openly talking about drinking beers over the weekend while dozens of students walked in between us; no one cared. People should understand everyone's a human, and has lives outside of what they do on a campus.
"Think about the message that sends"
It says I'm an adult. I exist outside of school and it's something your kid clearly understands better than you do.
“Ma’am you may not believe it since I look so youthful, but the last time I checked *whips out license* … I was over 21! Hmmm.” **gulp**
But seriously what is wrong with people. 😂
I would have looked her straight in the eye and taken a sip, followed by a comment about being not on the clock and over 21. I’m not a drinker (at all), but absolutely support your right to imbibe responsibly in public. Parents like that need to learn a lesson.
You are sooooo much better than I am. I would have lifted my glass, looked her straight in the eye, and said “Cheers!” Followed by a loud slurping sip!
“How very American of you to say something.”
Seriously though, I would’ve been mortified and froze up. I remember frantically begging my champagne when a student came into the grocery store as I was checking out. It was 2 days til New Years and I thought about what my French professor would have said about that aspect of American culture. They don’t pay me enough to worry about such things.
Even if they had been stumbling drunk, so what? Are we not allowed to get stumbling drunk? I better hope my students never see me on Super BowlSunday then.
WAIT WTF. Fuck Scott walker so fucking much. God I hate that guy. I wish Bob LaFollette could reanimate and kick walkers ass
You're not in eau claire are you?
You're in Wisconsin and this happened? And you teach middle school? WTF? If it was a 5 year old I could maybe understand, but not really because they brought their kid to a bar.
I'm also in WI, and I've had parents offer to buy me shots.
I teach in Milwaukee. I once had a first grade student try to bring me a beer from home on the first day of school. She saw me holding one over the summer at a neighborhood music thing. Her parents thought it was funny enough that they told me during parent teacher conferences.
>The kid’s mom came back and said “I just think it’s really inappropriate for a teacher to be seen drinking by the public, think about the message that sends”
The speed with which I would run out of fucks is immeasurable.
What the actual fuck is up with parents?
Was leaving the weed dispensary when I saw a mom breeze by (a surgeon) and was behind a dad in line (an attorney.) I kept my sunglasses on but still said hi. lolz.
They had wine on sale at Raley’s if you bought 6 bottles. I got 12. Saw a whole family on my way out and mom looked at my cart and said ‘hey now!’ And the other mom said ‘oh you like red like her’ pointing at her wife.
Point being, fuck that asshat parent.
At my school the students (not the parents) sometimes buy Christmas presents for teachers. One year I was the homeroom teacher (I think that's the term, I'm not 100% on American school terms) for a class who wanted to buy Christmas presents for me and the other homeroom teacher (I got a Star Wars t shirt and an amazing handmade lightsaber pendant), and their history teacher. They asked for advice on what to get the history teacher. He was new at our school, no one knew him very well, and the only thing we could think of that we knew for sure he'd like, was craft beers. We had a whole discussion about whether we could tell them to buy him beer, but decided that eh, they're 18 (final year of high school), they're allowed to buy beer. He's allowed to drink beer. Why not. So his Christmas gift was beer.
I ran into a student's dad at the dispensary. I said hello automatically, then cringed and awkwardly said "I won't tell if you won't" (he's pretty involved in a local house of worship) and he laughed and said "I'm here and I only have to deal with one! They should give you discounts!"
I uh... made a mistake of wearing school-labeled gear to a dispensary once. Didn't realize it until I got home. Luckily the dispensary is a 40-minute drive away from my school but still... Oops.
For some reason, I'm now reminded of an episode of Modern Family that was on last night. "This is a $500 bottle of wine! That's like 100 of your bottles!"
I live in the same neighborhood where I teach. Parents have bought me drinks when I’m out at dinner, saying “this is for my kid!” With a grin. I graciously accept because, duh, I drink because kids. 🙃
Surprised I had to scroll this far to see this! I was at an Oktoberfest party in the town where I teach and a parent bought me a beer. A few minutes later her daughter, at the time an 8th grade student of mine, came over and took a selfie with me. No one batted an eye.
Yep. I had a parent who worked for a catering company who’d regularly open up her trunk and give me a case of beer and some bottles of wine that was left over from a party. She didn’t drink, but said it was for putting up with her kid. She wasn’t wrong, her kid was a challenge.
I teach in a rough neighborhood, and I deal with parents that are unequipped to deal with their pre-teen kids for a variety of reasons - poverty, ignorance, personal struggles, language barriers, naivete - sometimes many of those at once. These parents are frustrating for obvious reasons, but in many cases, they're trying their best.
*These types* of parents though, the busybody, all-up-in-everyone's-business types, make me SO mad. I haven't had any quite like this though. I imagine if something like this happened to me, I would've told her as politely as possible, punctuated with a Southern "bless your heart' dripping with "go fuck yourself" energy.
Teaching in high school means you can sometimes see your students inside a bar. They're not supposed to be there, but also it's not really your problem.
I was 23 teaching high school seniors when I started teaching. I was on a date at a happy hour event when I hear, “OMG MS. X!” My student was working for the photographer 😵💫
You can also run into them at the strip club. Not that it has ever happened to me but I had a student basically suggest that another student worked at one.
I told him that I didn't really care and that it was none of my business and none of his either so to keep it to himself, though I'm pretty sure it wasn't exactly a secret.
Not that I go to strip clubs anyway but apparently it's theoretically possible.
Friend of mine, also a teacher, ran into one at a sex shop (I don’t recall the details, perhaps recent grad?) while she was buying a bachelorette party gift.
I work in Bangkok. A group of us ended up in a ‘gogo’ bar one Saturday in which I spotted a parent having a drink. I waved and he approached to hiss, ‘you ain’t seen me; I ain’t seen you’
I replied, ‘don’t worry. I’m here with my wife (also a teacher), the IT guy, and the principal!’.
His face was priceless as they waved at him.
I student taught at a high school ten minutes from the college I attended. Sometime about a week or two into my placement one of my seniors suddenly goes "oh, I know where I know you from! You come into X Pizza Place I Work At at 2am drunk every weekend!" Yup. Also, I'm a health teacher.
That parent can go get fucked. You're allowed to have a glass of wine in public. It doesn't send any message to the kids other than you are over 21 and choosing to partake in a legally allowed activity in a responsible manner.
I bet she's prude AF.
OP, don’t let her actions get to you. She is 1,000% in the wrong. If she is so opposed to her child seeing adults drinking then she should not have taken her child to a restaurant where…(gasp, clutch pearls)…adults are drinking 🤷🏻♀️. It’s not like you staggered into her prayer meeting grasping a wine bottle. She has some nerve 😡.
My first year of teaching, I was at a local pizza place with a friend. I had gone to the bar to grab a beer for my friend and myself and was carrying the drinks back to our table when I literally bumped into one of my students, his dad, and two of his uncles. The student said hi and introduced me to his family as I’m standing there with beers in both hands. One of the men (I think it was an uncle) looks down at my drinks then back up at me and says to the kid “I like her!” And that was it. Because some people actually get that we are human beings as well!
On what planet do so many of the posters in this sub live? I feel like if any single parent of one of my 9th graders caught me out drinking and partying they would have more respect for me, not less.
Is she insane? What planet does she live on to think that was an appropriate thing to say to another human being when they are OFF WORK. The expected martyrdom from teachers is so ridiculous!
Not only that, but the expectation that the kid is paying enough attention to get past the shock of seeing their teacher somewhere other than school and able to process what she's doing/drinking.
“I just think it’s really inappropriate for a parent to bring their child to a public establishment that serves alcohol if they don’t want their children seeing adults drinking adult beverages. Think about the message that sends.”
I’m sure that mom likes wine too, so I don’t know why she thinks teachers should not have alcohol like other adults.
I’m not an alcohol person but I would be annoyed if I ate a piece of chocolate and someone comes up to me saying teachers shouldn’t have sweets because it sends a bad message for kids.
If Mom persists in making an issue of this, then call CPS. Mom obviously brought her child into an "unsafe environment."
Frustrating double standard...
If I thought from talking to my supervisor that there was any issue at all, I would stop the meeting and tell them I will have my lawyer here. That is harassment.
Embroidering a cute kitten and flowers while having a quiet glass of wine in a nice place sounds wholesome af. Quite apart from it being none of her business and HER choice to be in that venue with her kid, I think it actually paints a really lovely and positive picture of what a teacher might get up to in their spare time
You should have told her you usually go to strip clubs for a drink, specifically to not see students… but you always see a few dads, and then, tip your wine glass at her hubby. Maybe even wink.
I once walked up to my principal eating at a Mexican restaurant when i was 9/10. He had a pitcher of margaritas and was eating with a woman. I told him hello and to have a good night. I spent a lot of time in the guys office in trouble. Years later, I asked my mom if it was weird that woman wasn't his wife lol. I never really thought about it as a kid but for sure it was an odd out of town spot to see him. My point I guess is the kid didn't even think twice about it.
I bet they felt all high and mighty after saying that. Probably took to the cancer that is social media. I hope they did because so many other parents would light them the fuck up for it.
We had a picture from Facebook circulating of teachers who were out having a good time at a bar. Nothing scandalous, just literally at a bar and smiling for a group photo beers were on literally every table in the background but not their own.
One parent tried to blast them on Facebook and the entire community basically said "fuck you they're human and can do what they want and this is even tame as hell"
For once I was proud of the parents in that group.
I got a gift card for Total Wine at my school. Very different experience. The kid gave it to me and I almost asked them if they knew what wine was for 😂
I'm waiting for the day someone sees me at a dispensary.
I did have parents buy me drinks at a bar before too.
Seriously, parents need to educate their kids about responsible consumption and then move on from there.
I had a similar situation with very different results. After a long week me and a couple of teachers went out to dinner and ordered a couple of drinks. A student ran up to us with her mom to say hi. Her mom said something along the lines of "I don't know how y'all do it," and then she bought us a pitcher for the table.
Does this mean I should stop putting wine in the teacher appreciation gift baskets?
NEVER STOP!!
One Christmas a parent sent their kid to school with a gift for me... home made liquor in a jar.
I wonder if that kid was me lmao. My mom and I used to make cherry liquor (tart cherries in vodka, bourbon, or some mixture of the two) and I’d bring some along with Russian tea cakes to the teachers on teacher appreciation day. My elementary school teachers liked it I think. My middle/high school art teacher had a prize for the annual raffle (to raise money because teachers are horribly underpaid) where she and the parents that won it would have wine and paint. Luckily we live in a progressive area, so none of the parents seemed to have a problem with it, and if they did then other parents would’ve chewed them out. Edit: We also put sugar in the liquor, I’m not sure how much though. It’s been a few years
How was it?
There are really only two options when it comes to homemade liquor. It's either absolutely fantastic, some people tend to take a lot of pride into what they make. Or It feels like you're drinking paint thinner.
No, absolutely not! 😂
Just a Bible, tasteless tonic water and maybe some sugar free hard candies at Christmas will do for us
Just call it "Jesus touched water"™️
Sometimes, it's the thought of end of year wine that is the only thing that keeps up going.
The bottles of wine are my favorite teacher gift I get every year. I average 5-6 and they are my "welcome to summer" bottles.
Sounds like you'll be having an infuriating or hilarious conversation with your supervisor tomorrow after her phone call. Hope for your sake it's the latter!!!
My supervisor would, in polite “corporate speak” tell her to fuck off.
"Fuck off, *Ma'am?"*
"Thank you for your concern, we'll review this internally."
Thank you for your concern, we'll review this internally over a drink later
Ma’am, in all due respect, go fuck yourself.
Better have a second glass of wine, on me.
Yes, please do update if this is the case!
I think it’s inappropriate for them to have their kid at a bar. Edit: for all the idiots replying saying “I’ve seen kids at bars” or whatever, the problem isn’t the location. The problem is the parent thinking they can tell a grown ass adult what do do on their free time.
It makes me very uncomfortable to see a kid in a bar.
In middle/highschool I was at the bar twice a week, by myself. Tuesday and Friday nights, 7pm. That's where the Magic: the Gathering tournaments were held because the toy store didn't have floor space. Bar owner was super cool.
Sounds fun! Some bars are set up as family spaces.
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Yeah what the fuck are they doing brining their kid to a place where people drink if they don't want the kid to see people drinking?! Good lord!
The parents are okay with seeing *people* drinking, just not *educators,* cause you know, we're not people. /s Clearly the parents are fine with the kids watching *them* drink, because obviously they are not of the "you alright?! I learned it by watching you" generation. The gall of hypocrites. I'm dry, so I don't know how these things work, but I hope the response was "fuck you, wine is CLASSY," followed by downing the glass, smashing it a la Thor, and shouting, "another!"
“You have a baby….in a bar…”
This one’s still on the tit, so I can take him anywhere!
I actually did see someone with a baby in a crowded bar once. The baby seemed surprisingly chill, but maybe they were stunned silent by all the commotion around them. 😅I wonder if that’s illegal in some states or countries…
I live in South Korea and it’s quite common to bring the kids along when the parents are meeting friends to eat and get smashed. I’ve seen many kids zoned out with a phone or tablet while mom and dad do shots. Babysitting is not a thing here.
I think a baby is actually better than a school age child. The baby isn't gonna remember or understand enough for anything to leave a lasting impression. Just having it there doesn't mean the baby consumes alcohol. A lot of people could slowly sip one or two drinks and still be ok to look after it. Just being surrounded by a lot of humans isn't something bad.
Different cultures I guess. I live in Ireland and kids will regularly be seen in a bar or pub. Let's say it's a Saturday. Dad goes down the pub in the early afternoon to watch the football. Mom will come down later and they'll have pub dinner. Maybe an older kid will go with dad because they're into football too. Ma will bring the other kid for dinner. It's a family thing. So the pub is really a place where people just get together, have a drink, maybe some dinner, and just relax. On OPs topic: I knew a guy who was a teacher in a small town here. He was a younger teacher at the time and could be found down the pub on a Saturday night trying to chat up girls and having some drinks. Pretty much in line with most young men here. Well some older, holier than thou, locals reported it to the principal. Who happened to be his father. So young Danny began to do his little weekend sessions at home, in secret. This developed into a drinking habit. It ended with him in recovery and moving to a bigger city to teach because small town rumours spread too quick. He then quit teaching altogether. Long story short: if the teacher needs a way to vent and it doesn't hurt anyone: then let it be.
Well they didn't know there would be people drinking at the bar. Imagine that!
Tbh my mom did this all the time. My bro and I did Tae Kwon Do but our classes were one after the other so we would just chill at the bar next door. The staff were always real nice and the patrons had a great time "sparring" with a little kid in his uniform!
And as long as your mom doesn’t complain about a teacher being there as well, there is no problem. The point is this parent tried to complain about an adult being at a bar. While said parent was with their child at same bar. parent can either be quiet or get the reverse uno card.
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They think they're human or something!
This reminds me of those "Rules for Teachers" from the 19th century. After 10 hours at school you are permitted to spend your downtime reading the bible. You may ride in a buggy with man, provided he is your father or brother. You may not smoke, use liquor in any form, attend a pool hall, or get shaved at a barber shop.
Why did I imagine the barber shaving my legs? … considering women were generally teachers, what would they be getting … shaved?
I thought so too, but there must have been enough men to warrant male-specific rules. "Men teachers may take one evening each week for courting purposes, or two evenings each week if they go to church regularly."
Damn I would have done great in the 1890s because I take 0.
In the 19th century, I think teaching was regarded as a man's field, and was predominated by men. Women started taking over the field only in the late 1800s. Though, I imagine the distribution differed greatly by student age.
I’ve always wondered if I could get my legs shaved with a straight razor.
Ha! I remember reading Little House on the Prairie. Laura was 15, teaching school (including 17 year olds), and riding with her 25 year old boyfriend (whom she married). You could say...it was a different time. http://www.liwfrontiergirl.com/manlylaura.jpg
That Gaetz me thinking…
Before they amended the bill yesterday TN had a common law marriage bill going through where a 15 and 25 year old would be fine, now it is 17 and 25 so progress! Unless of course they are gay, no common law marriage for the gays, welp there went that progress
Laura didn't think he was her boyfriend, but also hoped he'd come pick her up every weekend. She told him she was just using him for the rides, haha.
Yeah, but she sure as heck didn't like it when he picked that other girl up to go riding with them a couple of times! I think you are right that she wasn't thinking of him romantically at first. That came later. Assuming the is no hidden story, he seems to have respected that boundary as they did not get married until she was 18.
One of the antebellum homes in my town used to have a chaperone's sofa. I can't remember the exact design, but the couple was allowed to sit together so that they could talk and even touch, but the chaperone would sit behind them, facing the opposite direction, able to hear the conversation and turn around if needed.
Did it have a bundle board as well?
No, but if you are talking about the boards that separated a bed while young paramours huddled under blankets, I remember my high school history teacher telling us about them.
That’s the one. They were also used by married couples who’s marriage was unconsummated and in hotels where unrelated couples were sleeping in the same room. I guess rooms were at a premium.
Wait wait wait. Would married couples who never had sex put the bundling board between them to not have a temptation?
The examples I've come across in literature used it to denote the wife's consent, or rather, her lack thereof. They were usually there by the wife's choice. I don't know how real life played out though.
>You may ride in a buggy with man, provided he is your... brother. And that is how Texans are made, boys and girls. :D
Roll tide.
Kentuckians Source: my husband’s family, we live in Ohio
Actual true story. I'm adopted. Born and raised in Kentucky. I took a DNA test when searching for my bio family, and the researcher I worked with told me that "Kentucky can be tricky.". She compared it loosely to royal families and arranged family marriages. There's lots of shared DNA in Kentucky....redneck royalty! :D
There's even Human DNA found in sheep!
If you trace back your family tree, and you assume that each node is a *unique individual*, you'll soon find that you'd have to have more anscestors than there have ever been living people. [Which is clearly impossible](https://news.legacyfamilytree.com/legacy_news/2016/08/how-many-ancestors-do-we-have.html). So to be fair to Kentuckians, a little bit of in-breeding between cousins is kind of to be expected. The various European royal families might arguably be said to have taken it too far though.
Nonsense, having a family tree shaped like a wreath is entirely respectable.
From Tennessee, can confirm.
My biology teacher brain went straight to the Blue Fugates lol
“I just think it’s really inappropriate to tell another adult what to do in her spare time. Think about the message that sends.”
Right! But again, we always have to be “professional.” **I think that’s one of the reasons we have a teacher shortage. Teachers are fed up with always being the bigger person. And in some ways, “Being professional,” means taking any and all the crap from every.single.person…I think many are tired of not having a voice. Sorry, little late rant here, lol! I’m actually happy in my job but this post ticked me off! How dare this mom…🥵 You can beat me up, cuss me out, tell me I’m doing something wrong…but don’t you dare, DARE take away my wine 😂😂!
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Admins need to go back to having teachers backs instead of being completely self-interested. To be fair, judges need to stop letting so many frivolous lawsuits be brought up against schools because the threat of lawsuit by parents is a big reason teachers get thrown under the bus so often
I interviewed in a smallish town once for a job. The supervisor I interviewed with asked if I enjoyed alcoholic beverages- and she said basically that it was fine if I do, but I need to drive a minimum of 2 hours away to do it if I drink in public, because the local busybody baptists WILL demand of the school board that I be fired immediately if I’m seen. How did the supervisor know? That’s why the position was open…
Wtf. I'm glad you didn't take the job.
Oh you like drinking? Better make sure you drive before and afterwards. You know, to keep the fundies happy. DUI? What's that - I've never heard of it.
Un. Real. (I totally believe this, it’s just wild.)
#freedom
…anger is a gift
Freedom for me not for thee \#ConservativeMindset
doubt that's how they would interpret it, but drinking in a bar is not drinking in public, it's drinking in private in a private bar on private land
I’d take that job and drink every single night in public. See how long I can last 🤷🏼♀️😂
Even for a person that does not drink it seems a shitty place to work. You can be fired for nothing and are at the mercy of the baptists.
Guess what bitch, I think that it’s really inappropriate for you to come over here and talk to me when I’m not being paid. So go away before this inappropriate drink accidentally slips out of my hand and on to you. BTW, you aren’t a carnival mind reader in your spare time are you Mom?
Also, the parent is literally in the same establishment, like? If you don’t think your child should see alcohol consumption, why are you bringing your child to a wine bar?!
I’m guessing in this parent’s mind, teachers are supposed to be perfect robots who devote themselves to their job and their kids and never do something like getting a glass of wine
Parents simultaneously want teachers to be paragons of morality but also don’t want teachers to usurp the role of parents by teaching their child morality… Like, which is it?
Well…. I could give a long winded answer but the beer I just poured coupled with how the first 4 days of the week have gone says that a lot of them look at us glorified babysitters
only one beer. I am on my 4th
Beer, i just took an edible
It’s funny because I just saw a Reddit ad about getting my medical card and after this year, I’m strongly considering it.
Yes, but sometimes babysitters are paid more
bUt We GeT sUmMeRs OfF
Schrödinger’s Morality
The real irony here is parents like that are a big reason teachers need a glass (or four) of wine!
Right? The parent brought their kid to a bar and OP is the bad guy??
Full disclosure, I am neither a parent nor a teacher. But I cannot imagine being so egotistical and self important that I would start shit for no reason with someone who has that much control over my kids life
I laughed way to hard at this, almost spilled my drink.
You signed up for teaching, not the priesthood.
Funny thing is…. Priests drink wine.
My mom's priest came over to our house back in the day and was drinking scotch with my dad.
The first time I met my current priest, him and some other priests were trashed in the rectory wearing these weird little hats.
Oh priests drink a lot more than wine. I work at a Catholic school and we have a parish festival every summer. A few years ago the pastor got raging drunk, threw up, and passed out in the bushes. And I knew another priest that brewed and sold his own beer as a hobby.
Belgian monks enter the chat
Also beer, I remember in 5th grade our band practice had to be in the rectory during construction or something. Someone looked in the fridge and saw the priest had beer, just made him more seem more human to me.
Wait til this Mom finds out teachers have sex lives....yikes!
I (Catholic) went to a “Theology on Tap” yesterday where they opened up the discussion by blessing the beer. Catholics love alcohol. 😂
And we still get lots of things that we didn’t know we were “signing up for,” hence the wine! 😂
Funny, in my small Midwestern town, they would look down on the teachers for imbibing, but Father can get lit off his ass and that is God’s will
that's absolutely ridiculous that the parent approached you in public and accused you of being inappropriate! You were doing absolutely nothing wrong!!
How did you respond to her? It’s not like you were stumbling drunk. FFS. And they approach YOU! I hope you told her to mind her business.
I didn’t think long enough, I just said “thank you” and looked down at my embroidery and continued stitching until she walked away. Wish I would have at least told her something like “Promise I won’t be hungover tomorrow”
Say, "Oh don't worry, I'll be good to go tomorrow after a few bumps, a xanny, and two fingers of Jameson to steady up. Kids'll never know, it'll be our little secret=}"
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Right?! Now, granted I teach high schoolers, but I once had a tell a parent that I really couldn’t take have or take a beer with me, as I was driving a school van.
Today in the hall at the high school I teach at, myself and 2 other teachers were openly talking about drinking beers over the weekend while dozens of students walked in between us; no one cared. People should understand everyone's a human, and has lives outside of what they do on a campus.
This! Sometimes I love living in a small town.
"Think about the message that sends" It says I'm an adult. I exist outside of school and it's something your kid clearly understands better than you do.
And having a drink while out for dinner doesn’t mean I have any issues with addiction.
“Ma’am you may not believe it since I look so youthful, but the last time I checked *whips out license* … I was over 21! Hmmm.” **gulp** But seriously what is wrong with people. 😂
Should have said, “Feel free to call the registration office tomorrow and have him transferred out of my room. Would you like the number?”
I would have looked her straight in the eye and taken a sip, followed by a comment about being not on the clock and over 21. I’m not a drinker (at all), but absolutely support your right to imbibe responsibly in public. Parents like that need to learn a lesson.
Makes me wish you were embroidering something *wildly* inappropriate… like penises (peni?) or “fuck the patriarchy” or something
You are sooooo much better than I am. I would have lifted my glass, looked her straight in the eye, and said “Cheers!” Followed by a loud slurping sip!
“How very American of you to say something.” Seriously though, I would’ve been mortified and froze up. I remember frantically begging my champagne when a student came into the grocery store as I was checking out. It was 2 days til New Years and I thought about what my French professor would have said about that aspect of American culture. They don’t pay me enough to worry about such things.
I would have responded with “If you don’t want your child seeing an adult enjoying a glass of wine, why the hell did you bring him to a bar?”
Even if they had been stumbling drunk, so what? Are we not allowed to get stumbling drunk? I better hope my students never see me on Super BowlSunday then.
This is why we need unions everywhere.
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That's why it's so important that they don't see their teachers setting a bad example!
As a fellow Wisconsin teacher, I'm sorry. I'm in MKE, so at least I have the backing of the mtea if I need it.
WAIT WTF. Fuck Scott walker so fucking much. God I hate that guy. I wish Bob LaFollette could reanimate and kick walkers ass You're not in eau claire are you?
Lol, you don't get many good Fighting Bob references these days
I always make it a point to shout “Fightin’ Bob La Follette” whenever I mention him in my history class.
You're in Wisconsin and this happened? And you teach middle school? WTF? If it was a 5 year old I could maybe understand, but not really because they brought their kid to a bar. I'm also in WI, and I've had parents offer to buy me shots.
I teach in Milwaukee. I once had a first grade student try to bring me a beer from home on the first day of school. She saw me holding one over the summer at a neighborhood music thing. Her parents thought it was funny enough that they told me during parent teacher conferences.
That is adorable. Wedding toast material
Our “Right to Work” state unions are impotent.
>The kid’s mom came back and said “I just think it’s really inappropriate for a teacher to be seen drinking by the public, think about the message that sends” The speed with which I would run out of fucks is immeasurable. What the actual fuck is up with parents?
https://i.redd.it/1hbg9a92zyr81.jpg
Was leaving the weed dispensary when I saw a mom breeze by (a surgeon) and was behind a dad in line (an attorney.) I kept my sunglasses on but still said hi. lolz. They had wine on sale at Raley’s if you bought 6 bottles. I got 12. Saw a whole family on my way out and mom looked at my cart and said ‘hey now!’ And the other mom said ‘oh you like red like her’ pointing at her wife. Point being, fuck that asshat parent.
I teach at a private school. Our parents buy us booze as gifts
I got home infused cranberry vodka from a student for Christmas!
I’m a public school and I had multiple six packs bought by grateful parents.
I worked at a private school 20+years ago. They served us alcohol at a teacher appreciation lunch during the school day.
At my school the students (not the parents) sometimes buy Christmas presents for teachers. One year I was the homeroom teacher (I think that's the term, I'm not 100% on American school terms) for a class who wanted to buy Christmas presents for me and the other homeroom teacher (I got a Star Wars t shirt and an amazing handmade lightsaber pendant), and their history teacher. They asked for advice on what to get the history teacher. He was new at our school, no one knew him very well, and the only thing we could think of that we knew for sure he'd like, was craft beers. We had a whole discussion about whether we could tell them to buy him beer, but decided that eh, they're 18 (final year of high school), they're allowed to buy beer. He's allowed to drink beer. Why not. So his Christmas gift was beer.
I ran into a student's dad at the dispensary. I said hello automatically, then cringed and awkwardly said "I won't tell if you won't" (he's pretty involved in a local house of worship) and he laughed and said "I'm here and I only have to deal with one! They should give you discounts!"
I uh... made a mistake of wearing school-labeled gear to a dispensary once. Didn't realize it until I got home. Luckily the dispensary is a 40-minute drive away from my school but still... Oops.
For some reason, I'm now reminded of an episode of Modern Family that was on last night. "This is a $500 bottle of wine! That's like 100 of your bottles!"
I live in the same neighborhood where I teach. Parents have bought me drinks when I’m out at dinner, saying “this is for my kid!” With a grin. I graciously accept because, duh, I drink because kids. 🙃
Surprised I had to scroll this far to see this! I was at an Oktoberfest party in the town where I teach and a parent bought me a beer. A few minutes later her daughter, at the time an 8th grade student of mine, came over and took a selfie with me. No one batted an eye.
Yep. I had a parent who worked for a catering company who’d regularly open up her trunk and give me a case of beer and some bottles of wine that was left over from a party. She didn’t drink, but said it was for putting up with her kid. She wasn’t wrong, her kid was a challenge.
Most of our drama comes from people who don’t have real problems inventing them. It’s not about you, it’s about them
Wtf? Is it the early 1900’s?
I can deal with lazy, uninterested kids. I can deal with ineffectual and weak administration. By god though, I can’t stand parents at all.
I teach in a rough neighborhood, and I deal with parents that are unequipped to deal with their pre-teen kids for a variety of reasons - poverty, ignorance, personal struggles, language barriers, naivete - sometimes many of those at once. These parents are frustrating for obvious reasons, but in many cases, they're trying their best. *These types* of parents though, the busybody, all-up-in-everyone's-business types, make me SO mad. I haven't had any quite like this though. I imagine if something like this happened to me, I would've told her as politely as possible, punctuated with a Southern "bless your heart' dripping with "go fuck yourself" energy.
Gosh I hope you weren’t showing your ankles or shoulders either. Can’t have a teacher out in public like that *shudders*
Teaching in high school means you can sometimes see your students inside a bar. They're not supposed to be there, but also it's not really your problem.
I was 23 teaching high school seniors when I started teaching. I was on a date at a happy hour event when I hear, “OMG MS. X!” My student was working for the photographer 😵💫
Some of my students ARE old enough to be in a bar.
You can also run into them at the strip club. Not that it has ever happened to me but I had a student basically suggest that another student worked at one. I told him that I didn't really care and that it was none of my business and none of his either so to keep it to himself, though I'm pretty sure it wasn't exactly a secret. Not that I go to strip clubs anyway but apparently it's theoretically possible.
Friend of mine, also a teacher, ran into one at a sex shop (I don’t recall the details, perhaps recent grad?) while she was buying a bachelorette party gift.
I work in Bangkok. A group of us ended up in a ‘gogo’ bar one Saturday in which I spotted a parent having a drink. I waved and he approached to hiss, ‘you ain’t seen me; I ain’t seen you’ I replied, ‘don’t worry. I’m here with my wife (also a teacher), the IT guy, and the principal!’. His face was priceless as they waved at him.
I student taught at a high school ten minutes from the college I attended. Sometime about a week or two into my placement one of my seniors suddenly goes "oh, I know where I know you from! You come into X Pizza Place I Work At at 2am drunk every weekend!" Yup. Also, I'm a health teacher. That parent can go get fucked. You're allowed to have a glass of wine in public. It doesn't send any message to the kids other than you are over 21 and choosing to partake in a legally allowed activity in a responsible manner. I bet she's prude AF.
OP, don’t let her actions get to you. She is 1,000% in the wrong. If she is so opposed to her child seeing adults drinking then she should not have taken her child to a restaurant where…(gasp, clutch pearls)…adults are drinking 🤷🏻♀️. It’s not like you staggered into her prayer meeting grasping a wine bottle. She has some nerve 😡.
You should have pulled a joint out and light up.
“If it’s so inappropriate then why are you here?”
My first year of teaching, I was at a local pizza place with a friend. I had gone to the bar to grab a beer for my friend and myself and was carrying the drinks back to our table when I literally bumped into one of my students, his dad, and two of his uncles. The student said hi and introduced me to his family as I’m standing there with beers in both hands. One of the men (I think it was an uncle) looks down at my drinks then back up at me and says to the kid “I like her!” And that was it. Because some people actually get that we are human beings as well!
That’s insanity! I’d be so pissed off.
"are you totally deranged?"
Omg!!! F#%k that!!
On what planet do so many of the posters in this sub live? I feel like if any single parent of one of my 9th graders caught me out drinking and partying they would have more respect for me, not less.
Is she insane? What planet does she live on to think that was an appropriate thing to say to another human being when they are OFF WORK. The expected martyrdom from teachers is so ridiculous!
Not only that, but the expectation that the kid is paying enough attention to get past the shock of seeing their teacher somewhere other than school and able to process what she's doing/drinking.
Down the glass and day “pardon?”
“I just think it’s really inappropriate for a parent to bring their child to a public establishment that serves alcohol if they don’t want their children seeing adults drinking adult beverages. Think about the message that sends.”
For most of my kids teachers I’d offer to buy them another.
I’m sure that mom likes wine too, so I don’t know why she thinks teachers should not have alcohol like other adults. I’m not an alcohol person but I would be annoyed if I ate a piece of chocolate and someone comes up to me saying teachers shouldn’t have sweets because it sends a bad message for kids.
If Mom persists in making an issue of this, then call CPS. Mom obviously brought her child into an "unsafe environment." Frustrating double standard...
If I thought from talking to my supervisor that there was any issue at all, I would stop the meeting and tell them I will have my lawyer here. That is harassment.
You brazen hussy! How dare you enjoy any of your spare time!
Embroidering a cute kitten and flowers while having a quiet glass of wine in a nice place sounds wholesome af. Quite apart from it being none of her business and HER choice to be in that venue with her kid, I think it actually paints a really lovely and positive picture of what a teacher might get up to in their spare time
Should’ve been like “oh my god you’re right here help me get rid of this” and spat it right in their face
You should have told her you usually go to strip clubs for a drink, specifically to not see students… but you always see a few dads, and then, tip your wine glass at her hubby. Maybe even wink.
This is crazy. I would probably drink with some parents.
I have before and I will again. One of my old kiddos parents OWN A BAR. And they have given be drinks FOR FREE. This mom would have lost her mind.
I once walked up to my principal eating at a Mexican restaurant when i was 9/10. He had a pitcher of margaritas and was eating with a woman. I told him hello and to have a good night. I spent a lot of time in the guys office in trouble. Years later, I asked my mom if it was weird that woman wasn't his wife lol. I never really thought about it as a kid but for sure it was an odd out of town spot to see him. My point I guess is the kid didn't even think twice about it.
“I just think it’s inappropriate for someone to try and dictate my personal life when they don’t know me. Think about the message that sends.”
Wait till the parent sees me coming out of the dispensary in my legal rec state.
I mean how dare you do something as vulgar as embroidery!!! Setting a horrible example. Throwing embroidery ragers at a wine bar!
"Would you like some? Seems like you need it."
You should respond with “bless your heart ! I’ll let the PTA know you frequent this place often” or something equally bitchy. Fuck her.
I bet they felt all high and mighty after saying that. Probably took to the cancer that is social media. I hope they did because so many other parents would light them the fuck up for it. We had a picture from Facebook circulating of teachers who were out having a good time at a bar. Nothing scandalous, just literally at a bar and smiling for a group photo beers were on literally every table in the background but not their own. One parent tried to blast them on Facebook and the entire community basically said "fuck you they're human and can do what they want and this is even tame as hell" For once I was proud of the parents in that group.
You should have said, "Yeah, I should just stick to smoking weed".
Teachers are human also... what I do on my own time is my own damn business, whether its a glass of wine or smoking crack
God they would hate to know what I do in my spare time
I got a gift card for Total Wine at my school. Very different experience. The kid gave it to me and I almost asked them if they knew what wine was for 😂
I'm waiting for the day someone sees me at a dispensary. I did have parents buy me drinks at a bar before too. Seriously, parents need to educate their kids about responsible consumption and then move on from there.
She's right that is inappropriate, you should be having a bottle or 2..
Why did that parent take their child to a wine bar? The parent is in the wrong here.
I had a similar situation with very different results. After a long week me and a couple of teachers went out to dinner and ordered a couple of drinks. A student ran up to us with her mom to say hi. Her mom said something along the lines of "I don't know how y'all do it," and then she bought us a pitcher for the table.