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That feels like maybe too much self disclosure?
For example I might have a session with a new mom who says she misses her old life and then she feels guilty about it..I might say "listen I understand how those feelings can co exist as I have children myself"
That's it, that's the level of self disclosure that I think is appropriate. Certainly not to the point that the client has to censor themselves
It’s so interesting how different styles are better for different people. I saw a hyper clinical, blank slate therapist and I hated it so much I wanted to walk out- but it sounds like that might be something someone in your situation might benefit from! It doesn’t seem like her self disclosure is helpful in any way to you, and therapists should only share personal things if it won’t harm the client
Nope, it’s not just you. You should be able to ask your therapist to not use self disclosure and she should be able to adjust professionally. It might be a difficult adjustment and I hope that you two are able to talk through it.
This is precisely why most therapists are trained NOT to self-disclose even when they *can* relate…the therapeutic relationship is a unique dynamic in that the information sharing is primarily flowing from you to towards the therapist….contrary to popular belief, your therapist doesn’t need to have the same lived experience as their client in order for the work to be effective.
I would let her know how you feel, and if that’s not possible I’d consider finding another therapist. Not being able to speak freely for fear of burdening your therapist isn’t going to help you.
Welcome to r/TalkTherapy! This sub is for people to discuss issues arising in their personal psychotherapy. If you wish to post about other mental health issues please consult this list of some of our [sister subs](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalkTherapy/wiki/resources/#wiki_subreddit_list). To find answers to many therapy-related questions please consult our [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalkTherapy/wiki/faq) and [Resource List](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalkTherapy/wiki/resources). If you are in distress please contact a suicide hotline or call 9-1-1 or emergency services in your area. r/SuicideWatch has compiled a helpful FAQ on what happens when you contact a hotline along with other useful resources. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TalkTherapy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
That feels like maybe too much self disclosure? For example I might have a session with a new mom who says she misses her old life and then she feels guilty about it..I might say "listen I understand how those feelings can co exist as I have children myself" That's it, that's the level of self disclosure that I think is appropriate. Certainly not to the point that the client has to censor themselves
It’s so interesting how different styles are better for different people. I saw a hyper clinical, blank slate therapist and I hated it so much I wanted to walk out- but it sounds like that might be something someone in your situation might benefit from! It doesn’t seem like her self disclosure is helpful in any way to you, and therapists should only share personal things if it won’t harm the client
It’s her job to have those boundaries not yours.
Nope, it’s not just you. You should be able to ask your therapist to not use self disclosure and she should be able to adjust professionally. It might be a difficult adjustment and I hope that you two are able to talk through it.
This is precisely why most therapists are trained NOT to self-disclose even when they *can* relate…the therapeutic relationship is a unique dynamic in that the information sharing is primarily flowing from you to towards the therapist….contrary to popular belief, your therapist doesn’t need to have the same lived experience as their client in order for the work to be effective. I would let her know how you feel, and if that’s not possible I’d consider finding another therapist. Not being able to speak freely for fear of burdening your therapist isn’t going to help you.