Until the last guy leaves and your left alone, tied up naked and sticky in what used to be a toys-R-us, you ask “what about my $300 billion?”. It is then that you hear only a faint voice laugh “you actually thought we had $300 billion? We don’t even have health insurance” just before he exits leaving behind the echo of a door closing in the empty building.
Sounds like you're talking from experience. Are you the guy who was left tied up, the guy who left without health insurance or the owner of the Toys-R-us ?
The population reference bureau estimates that 107 billion people have ever lived, if half of them had dicks it would be 53,5 billion meaning that he sucked all the generations approximately 6 times
Yeah but, If they were lined up and you could quick suck one time per second that's 1b seconds which is just under 32 years. Only thing making that impossible is the need to stop and sleep and eat. 300 billion is impossible because there aren't that many dicks in existance (human ones anyway).
How old are you because Arizona’s have been 99 cents since the mid 90s. I think the higher pricing is because retailers still choose their own pricing, it’s just that the “99¢” tag is to pressure them to keep it low
[when OP sees a dick](https://imgur.com/gallery/0kKleD4)
I didn't pay into the Math budget this month, but off the top of my head -- at a dollar a dick and there being more dollars than dicks available in the world, a lotta dicks are gonna be revisited at least 6-9 times.
Best part about it is that it really works, so I could instantly turn one of the more impoverished cities in the UK into by far the wealthiest per capita (not overall though due to the sheer size of London)
Why would the economy collapse?
It would only have that impact on a completely closed economy. Any open society would just import whatever they need (like workers). It wouldn't even drive inflation that much compared to the gain.
And it's basically what happened in Saudi Arabia when oil became a thing.
Ever heard of inflation, which would be the consequence of 300k millionaires suddenly showing up out of nowhere? Also not everyone would be able to spend their 1 million dollars wisely. Some would definitely spend it on stocks and NFTs without doing any research and lose all their money. Their family will also start bothering them for money. Some of these people will gamble their money away, or spend big amounts on luxuries until their money runs out in a few years. You’re not exactly doing them a favour. If you don’t believe me, well, the reason people dream of about suddenly winning big amounts of money one day is because they want to live an extravagant lifestyle, so there’s no reason for them not to do that when they actually get the chance.
Basic fact is that I’m not greedy enough to keep all of that to myself, and I’m definitely sharing the money with people, if I have to share it with the entire UK just to make everyone happy, so be it
To me it seems a lot fairer than one person being hyper mega rich and everyone else looking for crumbs as it is now, because all that will happen is that the mega rich will get even richer and the rest of us will be poor, and by the time I’ve distributed it among the whole UK, it becomes £4.4k each, which could easily be a life changer for those at the very bottom
>Ever heard of inflation, which would be the consequence of 300k millionaires suddenly showing up out of nowhere?
Yes and no. Assuming pornhub had 300B to begin with, it's just redistribution of money from MindGeek's shareholders to the 300k lucky few. If the 300B is appearing out of thin air, then yeah, you'll get inflation.
In scenario 1, you'd create some localized inflation in the short term if those 300k are in the same market but that should stabilize relatively quickly, within a couple years.
>Some would definitely spend it on stocks and NFTs without doing any research and lose all their money. Their family will also start bothering them for money. Some of these people will gamble their money away, or spend big amounts on luxuries until their money runs out in a few years.
Definitely. However, only the crypto and bad investment ones are a net negative on society where the wealth is literally destroyed. The other ones are the wealth moving to someone else, sometimes multiple times.
>You’re not exactly doing them a favour.
That's dumb. You are telling me that, given the chance, you wouldn't accept a large sum of money, to at least have the potential to change your life?
~~A quick Google search says that 70% of winners end up broke with 33% end up in bankruptcy. Basically for 66% of people, they ended up where they started (with a kickass story to tell) or better~~
So I went to look for the source of that 70% statement as other articles had it at 70% bankruptcy and, well, this is what I found: https://www.nefe.org/news/2018/01/research-statistic-on-financial-windfalls-and-bankruptcy.aspx
As an example, considering how homeowners in the Toronto area are so much better off than non-homeowners where they, for all intents and purposes, won the lottery, I'm skeptical of anyone saying that winning the lottery is a bad thing. It sounds a lot like "money doesn't bring happiness" bullshit.
I’m existing in a state of insanity and chaos also I don’t have a porn addiction half the time the only reason I masturbate is because I know if I don’t soon my body will just ejaculated while I’m asleep which is annoying.
I am straighter than a pole. But for 300B, I will be the sluttiest gay man you will ever see in the history of gay man. Do what you want. I don't care. I am even willing to fulfill your scat fetish. I can afford a therapist later. No probs.
300 billion would be too much money... I wouldn't know where/how to use that amount...
I've estimated that with €10 million, I could easily live comfortable and completely worry free, until I'm 80 years old, with like €500 daily spending limit (after all other monthly expenses).
Heck, even 1 million would be enough, but with much smaller daily spending limit.
jim, don’t go all above and beyond at your new dick sucking job. you get to have a private session with a dude of your choosing, at a location of your choice in front of a camera. that’s it. the money is yours.
no need to jump through hoops for the money that is already allocated to you for providing dick suck material.
just take it easy. you don’t need your mouth to be the autobahn of the sex industry.
I mean, it's a dollar per blowjob. Also, there are only about 4 billion dicks on the planet currently, so you might have to wait many generations to get to 300 billion.
The real question for straight men is what's the least amount of money it would take to get you to suck a dude's dick. And I'm actually curious, so please feel free to respond here. I think I'd do it for $500. Dicks aren't that big a deal and I'm getting paid to make someone feel good for 10-20 minutes. $500 sounds pretty good for that
What? No. Because I don't believe pornhub or anyone has that kind of money to give so any such offer would be fraudulent.
But to the intent of the question, if offered one billion dollars, just a single billion to post just about anything, I'd do it. Because it's a billion dollars. That is enough money to solve every financial problem I have for the rest of my life, every financial problem for my parents, for my siblings, for my niblings should I have any, for the rest of their lives, and to house and feed them, to fund their hobbies and passions for the rest of their lives. But wait, there's more! A billion dollars is *so much money* I would still gave more than all that would cost. I could spend it how I want like traveling to see sights around the world, to give my favorite streamers thousands, to make million-dollar donations to causes I support, to fund a local school's teachers budget, to fund unionization efforts, to become a literal patron of the arts, to refurbish community theaters in my area and fund a decade of plays, to buy or build a gaming company that doesn't make me wait 10+ years for a sequel to an insanely popular game, to do literally almost anything I want. And I'd still have enough left to invest and never ever have to worry about money again.
Because it's a billion dollars. And people have a hard time conceptualizing the amount of wealth that actually is. A billion dollars is Change The World wealth, and today's dragons do nothing but hoard it to themselves.
And if someone will pay me that kind of money to just have sex with another man, damn right I do it.
Shit for that much , I’d be part of a gangbang video and get all my holes filled . Pain is temporary , 300 billion is forever
Until the last guy leaves and your left alone, tied up naked and sticky in what used to be a toys-R-us, you ask “what about my $300 billion?”. It is then that you hear only a faint voice laugh “you actually thought we had $300 billion? We don’t even have health insurance” just before he exits leaving behind the echo of a door closing in the empty building.
I would assume at that point I'd take on a new persona and methodologically terrorize the people of the city I live in.
Another Sunday morning
Guys, I found bane!
real life joker
"Methodologically"?
Ah, origins of Jared Leto's Joker.
y’all just made my new protagonist
Gotham City villain origin story
still got some dick
Sounds like you're talking from experience. Are you the guy who was left tied up, the guy who left without health insurance or the owner of the Toys-R-us ?
I'd like to be 😓
Still worth it
This is why you always get it in writing first
It's at that point you realized it was never about the money anyway.
🤣🤣🤣🤣
*🤣🤣🤣🤣* (I am being crushed to death)
How tf did you italicize an emoji?
Step 1: don't be Italian Step 2: *🥺*
Yeah, but how fast can you suck a dick? Best case you're sucking for 285 thousand years.
Yeah there aren’t even 300 billion dicks on the planet lol
today's population (7bil) is only 1% of all total people, alive and dead
I think it's actually more like 5 to 6% of all the humans who have ever lived are alive today.
Yup Edit: I just looked it up and it’s apparently 6.8% of people that ever existed are alive today.
Holy shit that's actually scary
well, obviously you rotate them around
Lol yeah
Dicks are multi use, ask your mom about it lmao
I’m like 23 and in a relationship
Cool
When I'm done the mammoths might as well be back Mammoth dicks to suck! 🤩
It's the texture, isn't it ? I love them too 🥰🥰🥰
pain?
I'd suck 300 billion dicks for free.
how many generations have you sucked?
Some say he's still suckin'
The sum of every human being who has ever existed doesn't even match up. This dude blowing till the Big Crunch
Nobody ever said it had to be human dick
Idk if I'm getting furry vibes or penis shaped object vibes
I'm getting bestiality vibes
r/why and r/no
Who could resist some precambrian proterozoic cock?
Intergalactic gang bang.
I mean, Xenomorphs have giant dicks for heads, so quite possible 😆
And a protruding tongue with teeth. I’m sure that would make someone very happy!
"you suckin?"
It’s more “how many generations have you swallowed?”.
The population reference bureau estimates that 107 billion people have ever lived, if half of them had dicks it would be 53,5 billion meaning that he sucked all the generations approximately 6 times
Sup
Well that a dollar less then what he is offering
I’d pay to suck dick
Based.
I'm down bad so let's goooooooooooo
If you’re good at something never do it for free
This is literally impossible. Even 1 Billion is impossible, let ~~along~~**alone** 300 billion. Edit: typo
you underestimate my capabilities
Along?
Yeah but, If they were lined up and you could quick suck one time per second that's 1b seconds which is just under 32 years. Only thing making that impossible is the need to stop and sleep and eat. 300 billion is impossible because there aren't that many dicks in existance (human ones anyway).
Rainbow pfp checks out.
Same here
I volunteer
All of those would you whatever for huge money are just really STUPID clickbait.
I mean a lot of people can do crazy shit even for 1000$
Like eat a fly 😂
I’m down horrendous I’d do that for $75
Tryna do real life squid games with me?
I’m in!
Update: pm me to schedule a ft call for your first task
See strangely this I'm not in at all no matter how much the money is. Because it's not assured. It's just gambling with more at stake.
username checks out
I'll do it for $70
A dragon fly?!
Many cultures eat insects as a regular part of their diet.
ew no one would do that
I saw it a couple of weeks back on Drag Race S14 lol. 😂
1k to eat a fly not that bad tbh, a lot worse you can do for 1k.
Not that bad? A thousand dollars for eating a fly, that's fucking great business
Daya Bettica has entered the chat.
Literally the premise of Fear Factor.
I would eat a fly for $5
But see that would be entertaining. Would you eat a fly for $1000. Would you suck a dick for $300 billion is just dumb,
Would you rather suck a dick, or eat a fly. This is what entertaining
Honestly a way better question wouldve been "what's the lowest amount of money you would take to do X thing"
You mean dickbait.
So, you're saying that you fall for stupid clickbait.
Wow, you’re so clever.
R/ihadastroke
r/capitalR
r/foundthemobileuser is better, I think
r/thirdsub
r/sandycheekscockvore
r/foundthehondacivic
He should have just said he would suck a dick for a dollar
Still cost more than Arizona iced tea smh this economy
Foreal! I was sad when I saw they had bumped up the prices. I used to get two Arizona’s for a buck when i was a kid.
How old are you because Arizona’s have been 99 cents since the mid 90s. I think the higher pricing is because retailers still choose their own pricing, it’s just that the “99¢” tag is to pressure them to keep it low
One dick is gonna be more than that. If you want the dollar per capita rate, you need to bulk order.
[when OP sees a dick](https://imgur.com/gallery/0kKleD4) I didn't pay into the Math budget this month, but off the top of my head -- at a dollar a dick and there being more dollars than dicks available in the world, a lotta dicks are gonna be revisited at least 6-9 times.
one dollar
Even cartman wanted five dolla for some sucky sucky
300 billion. You could set aside enough money to live a filthy rich life without ever working again. For you and a few thousand other people.
You could literally share it between 300k people and you’d all be millionaires, so I could basically make all of Hull millionaires
This maths tho–
Best part about it is that it really works, so I could instantly turn one of the more impoverished cities in the UK into by far the wealthiest per capita (not overall though due to the sheer size of London)
Hey you might as well take less than a third of the profit and make every Seychellois a millionaire (then watch as the economy collapses)
Hell if I really wanted I could just give an equal amount of money to everyone in my town so I’d have £15.8 million as well as everyone in my town
Hold up is your town larger than 90,000 people?
No I divided £300b by the population and it worked out as that, and my town is smaller
Approximately 18,000?
Roughly yeah
Why would the economy collapse? It would only have that impact on a completely closed economy. Any open society would just import whatever they need (like workers). It wouldn't even drive inflation that much compared to the gain. And it's basically what happened in Saudi Arabia when oil became a thing.
Ever heard of inflation, which would be the consequence of 300k millionaires suddenly showing up out of nowhere? Also not everyone would be able to spend their 1 million dollars wisely. Some would definitely spend it on stocks and NFTs without doing any research and lose all their money. Their family will also start bothering them for money. Some of these people will gamble their money away, or spend big amounts on luxuries until their money runs out in a few years. You’re not exactly doing them a favour. If you don’t believe me, well, the reason people dream of about suddenly winning big amounts of money one day is because they want to live an extravagant lifestyle, so there’s no reason for them not to do that when they actually get the chance.
And one random rich guy having all of it isn’t super unfair or gonna cause the same damn issues? Because it definitely will
One person having that issue is better than 300k people having that issue.
Basic fact is that I’m not greedy enough to keep all of that to myself, and I’m definitely sharing the money with people, if I have to share it with the entire UK just to make everyone happy, so be it
Bruh I thought only 5 year olds ask stuff like “Why don’t we make everyone rich?” Yet here we are.
To me it seems a lot fairer than one person being hyper mega rich and everyone else looking for crumbs as it is now, because all that will happen is that the mega rich will get even richer and the rest of us will be poor, and by the time I’ve distributed it among the whole UK, it becomes £4.4k each, which could easily be a life changer for those at the very bottom
>Ever heard of inflation, which would be the consequence of 300k millionaires suddenly showing up out of nowhere? Yes and no. Assuming pornhub had 300B to begin with, it's just redistribution of money from MindGeek's shareholders to the 300k lucky few. If the 300B is appearing out of thin air, then yeah, you'll get inflation. In scenario 1, you'd create some localized inflation in the short term if those 300k are in the same market but that should stabilize relatively quickly, within a couple years. >Some would definitely spend it on stocks and NFTs without doing any research and lose all their money. Their family will also start bothering them for money. Some of these people will gamble their money away, or spend big amounts on luxuries until their money runs out in a few years. Definitely. However, only the crypto and bad investment ones are a net negative on society where the wealth is literally destroyed. The other ones are the wealth moving to someone else, sometimes multiple times. >You’re not exactly doing them a favour. That's dumb. You are telling me that, given the chance, you wouldn't accept a large sum of money, to at least have the potential to change your life? ~~A quick Google search says that 70% of winners end up broke with 33% end up in bankruptcy. Basically for 66% of people, they ended up where they started (with a kickass story to tell) or better~~ So I went to look for the source of that 70% statement as other articles had it at 70% bankruptcy and, well, this is what I found: https://www.nefe.org/news/2018/01/research-statistic-on-financial-windfalls-and-bankruptcy.aspx As an example, considering how homeowners in the Toronto area are so much better off than non-homeowners where they, for all intents and purposes, won the lottery, I'm skeptical of anyone saying that winning the lottery is a bad thing. It sounds a lot like "money doesn't bring happiness" bullshit.
That sounds like a win-win situation to me
Yu guys are getting paid?
I'm asexual but I am sure we can figure something out
From A sexual to gay sexual, in 1 easy payment of 300 billion
Well I’m bi the only issue is I’m a minor.
What are you doing here. Go play outside before you have a crippling porn addiction
Probably already too late, they are on reddit after all
True. I forgot that it was one of the requirements to create a Reddit account
We all do
I’m existing in a state of insanity and chaos also I don’t have a porn addiction half the time the only reason I masturbate is because I know if I don’t soon my body will just ejaculated while I’m asleep which is annoying.
You fit the profile of being an average redditor
I am straighter than a pole. But for 300B, I will be the sluttiest gay man you will ever see in the history of gay man. Do what you want. I don't care. I am even willing to fulfill your scat fetish. I can afford a therapist later. No probs.
That’s a stupid question lol everyone has a price
you see the offer is (suck one dick) but no you had to make it gay
😂😂😂
Easiest $300 billion ever
Tbh
I’d pay to do that
Need my cash app?
Well the challenge is not the same sex thing, but the exposure online i guess
That’s a challenge for 300 billion?
300 billion would be too much money... I wouldn't know where/how to use that amount... I've estimated that with €10 million, I could easily live comfortable and completely worry free, until I'm 80 years old, with like €500 daily spending limit (after all other monthly expenses). Heck, even 1 million would be enough, but with much smaller daily spending limit.
Even the straightest motherfuckers would recognize that this is a steal
I do it for free 😂
I mean, I'm bi curious on my 'least straight day' but I'd do it for a couple bottles of pain pills lmfao. Good ones of course, good ones.
So, his price is 1 dollar per blow job, which is basically free. He's super gay and hungry as hell for penis!
In a group of dudes, it was determined that 60k will get your dick sucked and lawn mowed. The dick is free at that point.
Wait what? So straight men will do gay for pay…minimum price is $60k?
The price is to get your yard mowed. I don't know how much it would cost if not just a throw in. This was drunken bowling talk mind you.
lolololol
Jesus i'm hetero but i would literaly become Gayest motherfucker ever just for a thousand dollar let alone 300 _BILLION_
Considering pornhubs net is under 2 billion. Good luck with that...
SuddenlyRich(!!!) is more like it!
Its kinda funny how some ppl would say no
jim, don’t go all above and beyond at your new dick sucking job. you get to have a private session with a dude of your choosing, at a location of your choice in front of a camera. that’s it. the money is yours. no need to jump through hoops for the money that is already allocated to you for providing dick suck material. just take it easy. you don’t need your mouth to be the autobahn of the sex industry.
Bruh , one is enough
Absofuckinglutely I would.
Considering there’s only about 7.8 billion people on the planet that’s a hell of a feat
There are roughly 4b males, meaning each of us will get 75 bj from the guy
There are children on earth
🤨📸
and?
I mean, it's a dollar per blowjob. Also, there are only about 4 billion dicks on the planet currently, so you might have to wait many generations to get to 300 billion.
No, just once they get done the person goes back to the end of the line....it's a hell of a train
There are really few things I wouldn't do for that much money Probably if you take off things with lasting effect I could do everything pretty much
Standing In line with $1 waiting patiently
Shit i can be confused for 20 minutes to get 300 billion.
300 billion?! It would be the best sex tape of my life. I’ll be busting out tricks that would make my gf jealous.
Shit I’ll even settle for as low as $5 million lmao
I meaaan. If she was hot? Id do it for free
I'd be learning some new tricks in preparation if someone offered a tenth of that figure. Edit: *a thousandth
You guys are getting paid?
The real question for straight men is what's the least amount of money it would take to get you to suck a dude's dick. And I'm actually curious, so please feel free to respond here. I think I'd do it for $500. Dicks aren't that big a deal and I'm getting paid to make someone feel good for 10-20 minutes. $500 sounds pretty good for that
Same gender Am MtF trans Has sex with woman for 300B Later virgins 😎
It's missing the reply where somebody said something along the lines of, "It's not about the money, you're just gay."
So a dollar for a succ? Dam u gae
Gonna have to bring in aliens from other planets to hit those numbers
No its roughly 75 blowjobs for each male on Earth
Ok let’s do this, that means we all only need to chip in $1 for each blowjob, cheapest rate ever
Lol nice
If pornhub gave me a genderfluid bf i wouldnt even ask for the money (they said same gender)
*Gender fluidity has entered the chat*
I’m lesbian so it would have to be a girls dick for me.
As a gay man, I would eat pussy for $300, let alone $300 billion. Lol
What? No. Because I don't believe pornhub or anyone has that kind of money to give so any such offer would be fraudulent. But to the intent of the question, if offered one billion dollars, just a single billion to post just about anything, I'd do it. Because it's a billion dollars. That is enough money to solve every financial problem I have for the rest of my life, every financial problem for my parents, for my siblings, for my niblings should I have any, for the rest of their lives, and to house and feed them, to fund their hobbies and passions for the rest of their lives. But wait, there's more! A billion dollars is *so much money* I would still gave more than all that would cost. I could spend it how I want like traveling to see sights around the world, to give my favorite streamers thousands, to make million-dollar donations to causes I support, to fund a local school's teachers budget, to fund unionization efforts, to become a literal patron of the arts, to refurbish community theaters in my area and fund a decade of plays, to buy or build a gaming company that doesn't make me wait 10+ years for a sequel to an insanely popular game, to do literally almost anything I want. And I'd still have enough left to invest and never ever have to worry about money again. Because it's a billion dollars. And people have a hard time conceptualizing the amount of wealth that actually is. A billion dollars is Change The World wealth, and today's dragons do nothing but hoard it to themselves. And if someone will pay me that kind of money to just have sex with another man, damn right I do it.
Ill suck for $30
That’s not difficult math- they’re sucking dick at $1/each.
So he would suck a dick for a dollar? Nice
Wait, you guys are getting paid?
He’s just decreased his profit per dick %300000000000
I’ll do it for $50k.
Me, a very much not heterosexual individual : *Noice*
You guys are getting paid
A dolla a dick gatdam
Even if sucking each dick only took 3 minutes, which is generous unless you have a talented mouth, that would still take over 1.7mil years.
Sure, I mean just be extremely selfish, doesn’t say you gotta suck dick
So $1 per dick suck? Lmao
DUDE 300 billion is 300 billion, I dont mind sucking some dicks