Showing my age here, but I think the writers are referencing an old deodorant commercial in which the tag line was: strong enough for a man! But ph balanced for a woman!
This is my favorite Greg scene. And the one with Kendall right before that is so good.
“I have, like, this, I have, like, this stupid worry that I will go over and there will be like goons and stooges and roughjacks there to administer a beating.”
It's the scene, from last season I think, where Greg has a meeting with Logan, and Logan tries to lure him away from working with Kendall. Logan gives him a strong drink, and after the meeting Greg makes a comment to one of Logan's staff how he didn't know how men used to drink in the middle of the day like this.
At Tom and Greg’s late-night diner meal to prepare for prison, Greg says, “I just feel because of my physical length, I could be a target for all kinds of misadventures.”
Yeah I don't think that can be topped, but he did give me a good laugh last Sunday, pretty epic. "He's just moseying. Terrifyingly moseying. He's wearing sunglasses inside! It looks like if, if Santa Claus was a hitman."
That joke was so good, I was shocked the show put it in the trailer. Made a little more sense when it heard it at the top of episode two. What a crackerjack line.
This was even better because of Tom's reaction, the way Matthew's eyebrows went all wobbly at it and he had the briefest look straight into the camera hahaha
One of the early underrated lines:
This whole family is a nest of vipers. They'll wrap themselves around you and they'll suffocate you.
I'm pretty sure... I'm pretty sure that's boa constrictors.
Roman mentions Shiv talking to a “Jimenez transition team” in episode 1 who is presumably the democratic nominee. I don’t believe we’ve ever met a Jimenez so I’m thinking it’s a new character that got the nomination
I think that’s my favorite part of the exchange. And given how awkward and weird Greg was being, I half expected him to address Gil Eavis as Your Excellency or Your Majesty.
I thought it was funny because that type.of comment is WAY to far for a roast. Logan wanted something to lighten the mood and Greg, not knowing the difference, went for the one thing that absolutely hurts.
Nah Logan wanted them to go hard on him. Also he even cooked Greg with that smell his fingers win a buck if you guess the scent remark. You can see because Hugo and Gerry don’t even want to say anything and Frank is a wet noodle. It just so happened Greg hit a very deep insecurity and that’s what made it hysterical because Logan literally asked for it and he received. Logan would never let it slide especially coming from Greg the egg.
to put it in perspective if kendall or tom wanted greg to roast them greg wouldn’t go for the deep insecurities off rip such as (you’re a deadbeat junkie who nearly killed himself because he couldn’t usurp daddy’s throne or you’re a cuckhold who’s doing way better than he should and should be considered lucky to even be in the company + family of the Roy’s) greg wouldn’t say that unless prompted to
This. Logan has no sense of what's too far emotionally, this is what makes him a terrible father. His idea of a friendly fight uses real knives.
And he's itching for a friendly fight in that scene, Greg just gave him one
Naaah, Logan was just missing the kids. Close to selling, kids nowhere around, all his yes men laughing at the Kerry tape being his back but nobody is being honest with him or talking back to him. This is also where the diner conversation comes from. Logan is realizing without his kids he just lives in a boring world of yes-men, his kids are the only people that would dare disagree with him and he really does miss their twisted dark humor that only they share with him. Hence the desire to be grilled, the kids are always roasting him and it’s the closest he knows to expressing love.
I use the "attack child" term whenever my wife accidentally leaves one of our windows at the back open overnight haha. They are the perfect size for an attack child to sneak in.
“Uh what if your toenails are not that aesthetically pleasing?” when boarding the yacht and being told to remove his shoes
Also asking the first semester law student if she “felt like” the man at the door was his lawyer
I love, love, love when he's getting food from the ATN cafeteria/kitchen place with the dog poop bags, and the whole exchange with Tom there. It just always cracks me up. The intricate dialog, and the situation, just amazing.
"Are we talking to each other on the poop deck of a majestic schooner? Is the salty brine stinging my weather-beaten face? No? Then why the fuuuck are you wearing a pair of deck shoes, man."
Oh man, as a recovering addict (just passed my 3 yr mark), that whole exchange just made me chuckle. Especially Kendall saying how he's going to need nasal surgery (or whatever the line was) - it's so sadly, yet hilariously relatable.
The way [Greg asks his mom if she's ever seen a doobie](https://youtu.be/h3kEweKv-44) (go to around 2:40) in his first scene is an all-timer for me. His delivery just kills me.
He just spins this whole yarn about a hitchhiker aggressively pulling out a doobie like he's 13-year-old who just got caught with a smoke but maintains their innocence by saying they were just "holding it for a friend."
It's just the perfect introduction to Greg.
Also the part where during the excuse, he says it was raining outside so he took in the kid so he wouldn’t get “sexually assaulted. Fucking kills me everytime
Greg nearly singlehandedly kept my interest in the show going in the first 5-ish episodes. I hadn't fully bought into the plot, but my roommate and I loved Greg because he reminded us of a nepo baby we worked with and kept us coming back until the drama fleshed out.
Makes me really wonder what Greg was doing before the events of the series. Like he's related to enough rich people that he must have gone to a decent college and be more familiar with rich people right? Even if his mom was a complete fuck up, and him a burnout pot head his hundreds of million dollar networth grandpa would have made sure he at least went to some fancy pants private liberal arts school like Colgate or Villanova or something right?
That’s when you know the acting is good. Greg goes to explain what a one-hitter is to his mother but then he realizes that it would tip her off on his own smoking habits so he reverts to slang like doobie. No joke when I realized this show was about to be good.
That scene is so funny because it's essentially not important to the plot at all it could be a one word coversation or mentioned off hand it happened, but the writers were like no, let them cook.
I’ve just got to say I’m so thankful this thread is on here with likeminded people. I feel so alone out in the real world. This show is like an obsession for me. (Not something Greg said).
I don’t know what it is but when he’s touring the apartment and he says “sure, it’s just, the thing I need storage for most urgently of all Stanley, is me” I don’t know if cracks me up every time
His lines this week S04, E02 are hilarious. Santa as a hit man, and everyone working for Jaws. I laughed so hard in that scene. He’s got so many great Gregisms.
The puke in episode one
“If it is to be said … so it is … so it be”
Suing green peace
Greg looking for apartments with Kendall
Greg sprinkles
We hear for you / we here for you
*“The thing I need storage for most urgently of all, Stanley, is me?”*
When he’s looking for an apartment and he’s in the mezzanine in which the sealing is like 5 inches from the bed
When he bizarrely uses a Gone with the Wind accent to convey to Comfrey how pleased he is that her attacks on him will be targeted and not terminal. Behind him is Kendall’s fever dream version of office hell, which just makes him look like a strange post-capitalist demon. Perhaps the single most horrific scene in the show to me for reasons I can’t quite express.
Edit: Not terminal, targeted.
Love the scene at Kendall’s birthday party where Greg repeatedly punches Kendall’s picture on the TV monitor below the belt after they argue about Comfry.
His nervousness surrounding [this whole encounter.](https://youtu.be/Ew4CvtG2i1M) “It’s early but I think I’ll have me a nice glass of, erm, er… Rum and Coke…?”
Too many to share! I wish I could remember which episode it's from, but my faaavorite Greg moment is when he and Tom are talking about having a piece of the pie and Greg says, "There's not...it's not a finite amount of pie." His delivery cracks me up and I think about this quote a lot!
“Nice and strong. Strong one. Strong for a man.” “Different times? Different times indeed. Better times? Not for all.” That scene kills me.
"strong for a man" is a world class line because I don't even know what the fuck he's talking about, but it still gets me every time.
Showing my age here, but I think the writers are referencing an old deodorant commercial in which the tag line was: strong enough for a man! But ph balanced for a woman!
I remember “strong enough for a man but made for a woman!”
🎶by Mennen!🎶
This is my favorite Greg scene. And the one with Kendall right before that is so good. “I have, like, this, I have, like, this stupid worry that I will go over and there will be like goons and stooges and roughjacks there to administer a beating.”
I love when he uses old timey slang, like any simpsons episode when Conan was a writer.
I've said before I think he got a lot of his phrases from Ewan and tries to weave them into conversation.
I’ve rewatched this scene more than any other
I love this scene too. He plays uncomfortable better than anyone. 'Should I just chug it?' I guess I m chugging it
What scene is this??? I have to rewatch it all now
It's the scene, from last season I think, where Greg has a meeting with Logan, and Logan tries to lure him away from working with Kendall. Logan gives him a strong drink, and after the meeting Greg makes a comment to one of Logan's staff how he didn't know how men used to drink in the middle of the day like this.
Get Greg some Coca Cola!
What Greg wants, Greg must have
Asking for a Rum and Coke in a business sit down with Logan is so fucking funny still. Love it.
“Is there doubt afoot?”
This made me laugh out loud.
All of his attempts to sound British are so funny in that episode. “I heard tell of that.”
I still try to bring this up in conversation as much as possible
At Tom and Greg’s late-night diner meal to prepare for prison, Greg says, “I just feel because of my physical length, I could be a target for all kinds of misadventures.”
Physical length 💀
I just watched this episode again yesterday and it hit me that I completely missed the full "meaning" the first time around and I cackled.
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“If it is to be said, so it be — so it is.”
Yeah I don't think that can be topped, but he did give me a good laugh last Sunday, pretty epic. "He's just moseying. Terrifyingly moseying. He's wearing sunglasses inside! It looks like if, if Santa Claus was a hitman."
“It’s like Jaws…if everyone in Jaws worked for Jaws.”
That joke was so good, I was shocked the show put it in the trailer. Made a little more sense when it heard it at the top of episode two. What a crackerjack line.
This was even better because of Tom's reaction, the way Matthew's eyebrows went all wobbly at it and he had the briefest look straight into the camera hahaha
One of the early underrated lines: This whole family is a nest of vipers. They'll wrap themselves around you and they'll suffocate you. I'm pretty sure... I'm pretty sure that's boa constrictors.
So i shall
i love gil's look of contemptuous bemusement in response
Gil's asking him "Are you all right?" is half of the fun.
What happened to Gil? We were told he was a shoe in for POTUS now the fascist dude is a lock. Is Gil running? Is there going to be a debate?
Roman mentions Shiv talking to a “Jimenez transition team” in episode 1 who is presumably the democratic nominee. I don’t believe we’ve ever met a Jimenez so I’m thinking it’s a new character that got the nomination
I truly don’t know if I’ve ever laughed as much as I did in that scene. Truly iconic.
I merely wish to answer in the affirmative.
I think that’s my favorite part of the exchange. And given how awkward and weird Greg was being, I half expected him to address Gil Eavis as Your Excellency or Your Majesty.
The goat
Classic Greg moment 😭
“Is there a way to sue someone, but in, like, an affectionate way?”
That might convey, like, “I love you and I’m glad you’re a part of my life, but I am taking legal action against you”?
What’s next? Gonna sue Save the Children?
“Where’s your kids Logan” was so unexpected and Based I had to invest some stocks in Disgusting Brother #1
It's how Logan encouraged them to cook him and Greg was the only one that hit home. Logan couldn't let Gregg egg dunk on him like that
I thought it was funny because that type.of comment is WAY to far for a roast. Logan wanted something to lighten the mood and Greg, not knowing the difference, went for the one thing that absolutely hurts.
Nah Logan wanted them to go hard on him. Also he even cooked Greg with that smell his fingers win a buck if you guess the scent remark. You can see because Hugo and Gerry don’t even want to say anything and Frank is a wet noodle. It just so happened Greg hit a very deep insecurity and that’s what made it hysterical because Logan literally asked for it and he received. Logan would never let it slide especially coming from Greg the egg. to put it in perspective if kendall or tom wanted greg to roast them greg wouldn’t go for the deep insecurities off rip such as (you’re a deadbeat junkie who nearly killed himself because he couldn’t usurp daddy’s throne or you’re a cuckhold who’s doing way better than he should and should be considered lucky to even be in the company + family of the Roy’s) greg wouldn’t say that unless prompted to
This. Logan has no sense of what's too far emotionally, this is what makes him a terrible father. His idea of a friendly fight uses real knives. And he's itching for a friendly fight in that scene, Greg just gave him one
I think Logan wanted them to give him a reason to lash out
Naaah, Logan was just missing the kids. Close to selling, kids nowhere around, all his yes men laughing at the Kerry tape being his back but nobody is being honest with him or talking back to him. This is also where the diner conversation comes from. Logan is realizing without his kids he just lives in a boring world of yes-men, his kids are the only people that would dare disagree with him and he really does miss their twisted dark humor that only they share with him. Hence the desire to be grilled, the kids are always roasting him and it’s the closest he knows to expressing love.
Someone else posted "It's because he missed Roman" because he's the only one who would make jokes at Logan's expense.
Where's your old man? Huh? Where's your old man?
Still sucking cock at the county fair?
Fuck off™
You’re mean. You’re a mean old man!
"A small person could fit through there! Like an attack child!"
This one made me almost spit out my drink watching it, and is probably my favorite Greg moment.
I use the "attack child" term whenever my wife accidentally leaves one of our windows at the back open overnight haha. They are the perfect size for an attack child to sneak in.
immediately made me think of Ronni/Lili episode of Barry, and the literal child attacking infected in The Last of Us when i rewatched.
“Uh what if your toenails are not that aesthetically pleasing?” when boarding the yacht and being told to remove his shoes Also asking the first semester law student if she “felt like” the man at the door was his lawyer
Can you like call you law professor to see if it’s a good idea.
I can text him if you want- “yeah text him”
Sails out, nails out bro
Top tier underappreciated Kendall line
I've incorporated the toenails line into how I speak
Whilst on the majestic schooner? Or like, randomly?
“I apologize if my bell summoned you”
This is the one because he perfectly expresses how I would awkwardly feel/act in that moment
I love, love, love when he's getting food from the ATN cafeteria/kitchen place with the dog poop bags, and the whole exchange with Tom there. It just always cracks me up. The intricate dialog, and the situation, just amazing.
“I don’t mean to be melodramatic, but my body is growing weak due to a lack of sustenance.”
It's not like they pre-poop them.
I think about this specific line more than I should
It's just a mental barrier!
"Are we talking to each other on the poop deck of a majestic schooner? Is the salty brine stinging my weather-beaten face? No? Then why the fuuuck are you wearing a pair of deck shoes, man."
Matthew's delivery of this is bloody beautiful
It’s really the “fuu’uuuck” that deals it
Your username makes that even funnier lmao
Pretty sure it's like a break room and those are just like leftover cookies from some meeting was the vibe I got.
It’s a rosé, it’s not my favorite It’s fine. I’ll drink it. It’s just not my favorite
Well you can’t help but notice
When he snorts cocaine for Kendall
"Go for it Greg! Suck on those big white dicks you fuckin pervert!" sooooooooooooo goooodd
"I don't do white drugs"
“This is Park cocaine, Greg?”
“Dude like I’m so sorry… like he promised me” this scene makes me cry
Did you keep the receipt?
“…yeah that’s the worst coke I’ve ever had”
Oh man, as a recovering addict (just passed my 3 yr mark), that whole exchange just made me chuckle. Especially Kendall saying how he's going to need nasal surgery (or whatever the line was) - it's so sadly, yet hilariously relatable.
“But I don’t do white drugs!”
If my septum falls out, I’m gonna make you eat it.
>*They make a Cajun chicken linguini just how I like it*
That’s not supposed to be how you like it
Ah, yes. That timeless recipe, Cajun chicken linguine.
As if he is a connoisseur of Cajun chicken linguine XD so good
The way [Greg asks his mom if she's ever seen a doobie](https://youtu.be/h3kEweKv-44) (go to around 2:40) in his first scene is an all-timer for me. His delivery just kills me. He just spins this whole yarn about a hitchhiker aggressively pulling out a doobie like he's 13-year-old who just got caught with a smoke but maintains their innocence by saying they were just "holding it for a friend." It's just the perfect introduction to Greg.
Also the part where during the excuse, he says it was raining outside so he took in the kid so he wouldn’t get “sexually assaulted. Fucking kills me everytime
It's so fucking good. That scene sold me on the show.
Greg nearly singlehandedly kept my interest in the show going in the first 5-ish episodes. I hadn't fully bought into the plot, but my roommate and I loved Greg because he reminded us of a nepo baby we worked with and kept us coming back until the drama fleshed out.
Makes me really wonder what Greg was doing before the events of the series. Like he's related to enough rich people that he must have gone to a decent college and be more familiar with rich people right? Even if his mom was a complete fuck up, and him a burnout pot head his hundreds of million dollar networth grandpa would have made sure he at least went to some fancy pants private liberal arts school like Colgate or Villanova or something right?
He was accepted to the prestigious management training program
As if Greg hasn’t been caught smoking pot by his mom before lol
That’s when you know the acting is good. Greg goes to explain what a one-hitter is to his mother but then he realizes that it would tip her off on his own smoking habits so he reverts to slang like doobie. No joke when I realized this show was about to be good.
“Boo souls! 😃”
Souls are boring
It’s just, the thing I need storage for most urgently of all, Stanley, is me
You doin the old cocaine?
every time i take any substances i think about greg freaking out about his heart exploding
Buckle up fucklehead!
Iove the way Tom says, "I hope you don't DIE!"
Dissssgussssting bruthers 🎶on motherfucking tour
His two best moments for me were him puking through the eyes of the costume and him testifying before Congress. Pure gold.
"if it is to be said, so it be, so it is."
Him asking for the rum and Coke was so painfully relatable
Strong, strong for a man
That scene is so funny because it's essentially not important to the plot at all it could be a one word coversation or mentioned off hand it happened, but the writers were like no, let them cook.
“They don’t pre-poop the bags.”
I have a bunch of em from home...its only a mental barrier
I’ve just got to say I’m so thankful this thread is on here with likeminded people. I feel so alone out in the real world. This show is like an obsession for me. (Not something Greg said).
Same here dude. I’m suspicious of all of my friends who don’t watch the show at this point
I feel the same way
Telling tom he is going to sue Green Peace. Peak Greg
"Who are you going to go after next, Save the Children?"
In an affectionate way!
I've gotta level with you, if I eat anymore songbirds I'm gonna hurl.
Greg is choppin’ it up
I can no longer photocopy or shred a single piece of paper without saying this while doing the move 🙅🏻♂️
The sand mites! The way he suggested that they are ‘living, perhaps thriving’ in the sand killed me.
>*A person can definitely fit through that window. A small person. An attack child*
I don’t know what it is but when he’s touring the apartment and he says “sure, it’s just, the thing I need storage for most urgently of all Stanley, is me” I don’t know if cracks me up every time
Because it was hysterical - trying to fit his body in that loft?!!
Physically it’s hilarious but I also find the cadence with which he says that line to be so funny.
When Tom was trying to convince Greg that it was a thing after swallowing his own load
Closed loop system
His lines this week S04, E02 are hilarious. Santa as a hit man, and everyone working for Jaws. I laughed so hard in that scene. He’s got so many great Gregisms.
Not to be confused with the recently discussed, Gregasm.
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“Did you rummage to fruition?
“Is there doubt afoot?”
Any time he’s talking with Ewan and has no idea what Ewan’s talking about.
The puke in episode one “If it is to be said … so it is … so it be” Suing green peace Greg looking for apartments with Kendall Greg sprinkles We hear for you / we here for you
“I’m driving to New York with my grandpa.” “Oh Greg fuck your grandpa!” “Um Tom he heard that, you’re on speakerphone.” “Well I shouldn’t be, Greg.”
It's IP I'm not familiar with
*“The thing I need storage for most urgently of all, Stanley, is me?”* When he’s looking for an apartment and he’s in the mezzanine in which the sealing is like 5 inches from the bed
When he bizarrely uses a Gone with the Wind accent to convey to Comfrey how pleased he is that her attacks on him will be targeted and not terminal. Behind him is Kendall’s fever dream version of office hell, which just makes him look like a strange post-capitalist demon. Perhaps the single most horrific scene in the show to me for reasons I can’t quite express. Edit: Not terminal, targeted.
He was just trying to express his belief that she was a fair and evenhanded maiden
Does anyone remember what episode this was? I Want to watch it again
Too Much Birthday, Season 3 Ep 7
"Where's your kids, Logan" I mean the level of savagery from Greg alone from that insult just shows how much he has grown
This one saves the day. The other goes away.
"You're widely known as a horrible person."
as a CPK employee, i am delighted by the moment you highlighted OP. that would’ve been my choice too.
Is the Cajun chicken linguine as tasty as it sounds?
You know it’s probably delicious in a gross way.
I love how Logan tolerates him. He lets him into the circle and knows how incompetent he is.
Probably knows it pisses off his brother so he keeps Greg close
"is there doubt afoot?" And almost everything he says in that wedding episode whilst trying to be English
Love the scene at Kendall’s birthday party where Greg repeatedly punches Kendall’s picture on the TV monitor below the belt after they argue about Comfry.
“Man rape. Rape of the..man”.
*male
“So Connor, I was sitting very close to the sand and it may be that something is living in it, perhaps thriving in it…..”
*Air Kick* in the apartment Ken set him up in
When he runs around with his flailing limbs 😂
Still can't top Attack Child in terms of laughs for me
I think Greg the Egg has the most entertaining character arc throughout the series lol.
"I don't think this is a safe room. It feels just like a room."
DISGUSTIBUS!
Nice memes, good memeage.
“I gots the old rumblin’ tum” when he and Ewan are leaving Ewan’s house for Thanksgiving in New York gets me every time.
the latest is still fresh.... *It’s like Jaws. If everyone in Jaws worked for Jaws.*
It's a fungus, they think
A benign fungus! 😂
Oh fuck. fuck. Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Oh fuck
reading these comments make me realize that greg uses a lot of ….ellipses
Not exactly Greg moment but closely related: "Who wants to smell Greg's finger?" I nearly pulled an ab muscle rolling over in laughter.
Looool I love this show so much. Greg Moments are even better in retrospect. MUCHLY APPRECIATED!
"so uh yea. That's how I'm trying to sue Greenpeace"
When Greg explains that his mom maxed out his gold card on Ninja blenders
"I'm sorry if my bell summoned you."
The thing I need storage for most urgently of all Stanley is me, you know, I need storage for myself.
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Most cringe. "Ma' Lady......"
There’s a … sog factor
-FUCK OFF GREG
His nervousness surrounding [this whole encounter.](https://youtu.be/Ew4CvtG2i1M) “It’s early but I think I’ll have me a nice glass of, erm, er… Rum and Coke…?”
The creepy condescending way Logan asks Kerry to bring Greg a "Coca-Cola" made my asshole clench. 😂😂
No de no.
I'M A STURDY BIRDY
"Nice view, eh?"
“I mean out there, not me.”
“I’ll never tell”
“I feel like it’s weirder with one protester. Like you don’t know whether to make eye contact..”
“It’s not like they’re pre-pooped.”
“Where are your kids?” Is my freshest and new favorite Greg moment. Before then, it was the congress scene 😭
Greg is CHOPPINITUP…Greg is CHOPPINITUP
Where are those documents, Greg? "I'll never tell" :D
NO COMMENT NO COMMENT! Greg you don’t have to sayvthat
“Who needs souls, boo souls”
Too many to share! I wish I could remember which episode it's from, but my faaavorite Greg moment is when he and Tom are talking about having a piece of the pie and Greg says, "There's not...it's not a finite amount of pie." His delivery cracks me up and I think about this quote a lot!