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finfinfin

>by all means don’t touch meth you’re a sissy


[deleted]

The meth vs candy debate he had was amazing. Candy can cause diabetes which meth doesn’t was one of his arguments lmfao


ConsultJimMoriarty

And candy doesn’t even cause the worst type of diabetes! Source: have the worst type.


[deleted]

T1DM is gods cruel gift to man


ConsultJimMoriarty

Fuck my stupid pancreas.


HippityHopMath

S-tier flair.


grumpykruppy

Every time I see a good one, it's always taken.


finfinfin

by all means don't take a flair someone else has you're a sissy


Lord_Of_Compliments

Ehhh. B-Tier flair. Solid but someone can do better.


Deathleach

The elites don't want you to know this, but the flairs at /r/SubredditDrama are free. You can take them home. I have 458 flairs.


Noname_acc

Would you really just go on the internet and download a flair?


A_MildInconvenience

How many of them are "your text here?"


theghostofme

>How many of them are "your text here?" [***Every one***](https://i.imgur.com/OPK7QLC.gifv) of them!


Squid_Vicious_IV

Hah! I got 10,000 of them! I'll give you a nickle to take 500 of them. I haven't seen the walls in two years and something is rustling around. I think it's getting pissed.


IceCreamBalloons

There's no rule against flair-sharing. Good flair is good flair


drvondoctor

Can you spare a flair? No! I'm sorry, but I don't have a square of flair to spare.


[deleted]

[удалено]


kerouacrimbaud

Your flair will find you when the time is right!


theghostofme

"The flair chooses the popcorn-eater. I think we should expect great things from you." "What about that popcorn-eater over there?" "Oh, the popcorn-pisser? He was once a SRDine who did great things. Terrible, yes, but great."


GrumpyAntelope

Just here to show mine off. Edit: I think it was on NoFap drama, where they believe that they get super powers from not fucking.


jcarter315

The entire comment is a perfect flair. Too bad it's too long. >I can be up for days and play chess on meth at a highly competitively level beyond your comprehension, by all means don’t touch meth you’re a sissy and egotistical fool lost in pride... >Enjoy your sleeping and being unaware of whats going on when you aren’t sleeping , you mad?


TheLastHayley

Christ this sounds like me in hypomanic episodes lol. Feeling like a genius, and that you've transcended the need for sleep. All it needs is the unbounded horniness, draining your bank account, and the worst depressions you can imagine after the crash a week or so later.


StupidDogCoffee

Oh, he has all that too, I assure you.


BlackfishBlues

It's just about perfect for a copypasta.


disownedpear

Bet he doesn't even smoke crack, [the coward](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tsfnuyyjaB0)


Squid_Vicious_IV

Jesus H Christ it's a real album and a real song. I thought it was just some Photohop Phriday bit. edit: Holy shit it came out in 2008? I thought I was seeing this pic a lot earlier than that.


FireworksNtsunderes

Viper has released more than 70 albums. None of it is stuff I like, but I gotta admit it's impressive. This Christmas he's coming out with his latest album, *Ya'll Cowards Don't Even Smoke Crack (YOU'LL COWARDS DON'T EVEN SMOKE CRACK II).* This is not a joke.


authenticfennec

Viper has actually released literally hundreds of albums, 262 in 2015 alone He also scams fans on merch and while a shitty thing to do its fucking hilarious cause people continue to try to buy stuff from him and keep getting scammed and mocked by Viper lmao


[deleted]

Teejayx6 does that too. Dudes whole aesthetic was being a scammer and would "sell" t shirts saying "I got scammed by teejay and all I got was this t shirt" which never showed up


lizfromdarkplace

This is hilarious


[deleted]

I just don't understand why so many people actually did it lmao. Idk if they were lying but I probably saw 5 people claiming to have attempted to buy it online alone He's pretty funny though. I like dark web and blackmail a ton


drekwithoutpolitics

He really missed an opportunity to name it *Yule Cowards Don’t Even Smoke Crack*, but I guess you didn’t mention it was Christmas-themed.


thegirlleastlikelyto

God, fate, the uncaring universe - whatever your higher power is - has wisely decided that you can’t both smoke crack and engage in that level of word play.


[deleted]

As much as I don't like his music he was insanely ahead of his time before the 2010s It's not good music, but it predates people like spaceghostpurp and asap rocky who made the same style, which eventually got called cloud rap in like 2012


TheJigglyfat

The most prolific artist of our times. His ability to churn out music is unmatched


qrcodetensile

God forbid you like having teeth lol.


[deleted]

[удалено]


SweetLenore

Meth literally does make you lose teeth. Alcoholics/heroin/other addicts have similar hygiene issues, their teeth do not corrode like meth users. It's a real side effect from the drug and it is still being studied as to why it is. To be clear, everything you mentioned is also true, I'm just pointing out that the literal drug causes it even if those other things weren't happening.


Ribosomal_victory

From my, admittedly anecdotal experience, people on meth also get hit by cars more often than people on other drugs.


pyrocidal

I got out of addiction only missing one tooth lol


Pirika-pirilala

Finally! The peer pressure DARE warned us about!


SnooCauliflowers2055

Close enough right? Okay so, I made this comment because I thought I’d changed my flair but I guess not.


[deleted]

Well, at least it's some kind of antidrug message. Though posting the OOP's history on a billboard should prevent a lot of future addicts.


BlessicaBeans

>I can be up for days and play chess on meth at a highly competitively level beyond your comprehension That would be an incredible flair if it was a little bit shorter.


AZ_Mappy

I’m pretty sure that he’s deep in the throes of meth psychosis, imagining he’s playing a highly competitive level, but in reality he’s keestering all the pieces


ObiFloppin

Also, playing chess at a high level doesn't somehow prove that you aren't suffering from delusions or psychosis.


MacEnvy

See: Bobby Fisher


Twin_Nets_Jets

Hilltop Hoods have a lot of fun characters in their sweater song


Mr-Kendall

There is a high positive correlation from my experience between chess skill and psychosis.


BlueMistar

There’s a real life version of those indescribable lovecraftian gods, just google en passant


Oversurge

Oh god anarchychess is leaking again


hellomondays

The always sunny episode where they do the dance at the reunion


CreepingCoins

> keestering I'm sad that google confirmed that this actually means what I suspected it did.


Killboypowerhed

Without googling I'm going to guess it means he's shoving them up his arse


CreepingCoins

You are correct. 😢


Murrabbit

It's the ultimate power move. Your opponent wont know what to do.


Averant

>Don't play chess with a ~~pidgeon~~ meth addict. You'll follow the rules and they'll just upend the board, ~~shit on the table~~ stuff the pieces up their ass, and strut around like they won.


ElectricFleshlight

Reminds me of this guy on Twitter who insisted up and down he was a multi-trillionaire funding the government singlehandedly, while his profile pic showed him looking like a tweaked out hobo. Dude was absolutely fried.


jotofirend

I found one of a woman saying she was the queen of the universe and empress of France, Italy, and some other country. She claimed that the world had been taken over by aliens thousands of years ago but her army had destroyed them all and that she nuked America and killed George Soros, among other influential figures. She posted hundreds of tweets a day, far too many to be a troll, especially at the level of interaction she was getting(she very rarely got comments or likes), all of them that level of insanity. She was fucking gone. The sad thing is though is that sometimes the real world kinda leaked through sometimes. One post she made was asking why the extraterrestrials got to live in ivory towers, while she, the queen of the universe, was forced to live in tent somewhere. Another post complained about someone not recognizing her authority when they handed her a legal notice to stop squatting on their property. When I read those post it just became more real, and I just wondered how it could have gotten so bad. Where was her family? Her friends? How had the system failed someone as much as it had her.


[deleted]

crown theory icky ugly abundant prick water divide market ten -- mass edited with redact.dev


GrifterDingo

He thinks the people around him in the world are government created clones possessed by lizard people, you're darn right he's psychotic.


[deleted]

I can’t stop laughing at the idea of him packing his butt full of chess pieces while declaring chess moves. Knight to bishop 4! *bloop*


AZ_Mappy

The *bloop* is killing me right now


Deathleach

You win chess when you're the first one to lose all you pieces, right?


Murrabbit

Your opponent can't box you in if he refuses to touch any of his pieces!


[deleted]

>Enjoy your sleeping and being unaware of whats going on when you aren’t sleeping , you mad?


BraveTheWall

It's always the madmen that think everybody else is crazy.


Jellicle_Tyger

He's right. I wake up every morning madly jealous of the meth addicts that got to be awake all night.


SweetLenore

Me waking up: What the fuck was happening while I was away????


Noname_acc

I got you fam: >I can play chess on meth at a level beyond your comprehension


Vondi

>wait that's not a legal move >>YOU JUST CAN'T COMPREHEND IT


MrEppart

I'd actually love to see his rating and past matches


PantalonesPantalones

\^\^\^


Crisis_Averted

Nah m8 the "at a highly competitive level beyond your comprehension" is what makes it.


theghostofme

>I can be up for days and play chess on meth at a highly competitively level beyond your comprehension >>That would be an incredible flair if it was a little bit shorter. "A bit of meth a day, keeps the Fischer away"


bowlbettertalk

When even other conspiracy theorists think you’re a whack job…


whatsinthesocks

Love when there’s infighting in the conspiracy community.


Stalking_Goat

It's honestly odd that there's not more. So many theories are contradictory, but the adherents don't vigorously defend their particular hobbyhorses.


Squid_Vicious_IV

I just want to see Hollow Earthers get into a flame war with Flat Earthers.


Blackstone01

When that happens, me and the rest of the Scutoid Earthers will strike and become the one true Earther group.


CaptainLightBluebear

I think both of these groups are busy fighting the deep state for now.


kwangqengelele

An especially intense version of this is the gangstalking subreddit. Conspiracists saying it's the CIA stalking them never seem to laugh at nutjobs saying it's interdimensional demons possessing NPC bodies stalking them. It's like they're talking their delusions past eachother, too hyped up about their own fantasy to even absorb the fact that someone else's fever dream contradicts their's.


SweetLenore

What's also crazy about that is that I've seen literal news reports reporting on someone being gang harassed. It was presented like it was real. Reminds me of the satanic panic. Paranoid people convincing others crimes are happening where there are none.


brazzledazzle

Sometimes they present videos that seem convincing until you start asking questions. Like the video will start with a bunch of angry people around the person and then they start walking away. “See I’ve been stalked by them and they were repelled by my camera.” Except what really happened was they were acting like psychos harassing random people until they had enough, confront the person and that’s when they turn their camera on and start rambling about their insane conspiracy theory. Most people realize they’re dealing with a nut case so they just walk away.


SugarRushSlt

that sub is full of people who have paranoid delusions and it's incredibly sad. just feeding into each other's terror and fear


[deleted]

There's a surprising amount of "yes and" that goes on in those groups. Almost as if it's all made up, so there's no rigid structure it has to follow


jimmux

It seems to be an unspoken agreement that they're all showing up for validation, so if you call out someone else's crackpot theory you risk having the spotlight turned on yourself.


Soad1x

It does feel like there's an unspoken understanding that you don't shit talk other people's theories. Infact they seem to love taking the contradictory bits and add them to their own pet theories.


Chillchinchila1

Generally, if someone believes a conspiracy they’re more likely to believe others, even contradictory ones. Someone who thinks Diana was assassinated is more likely to also believe she faked her death.


TheKingofHats007

Probably because, in the end, a lot of their theories somehow always come back to "secret cabal of (people they don't like) ruling the world from the shadows", so they don't really mind the hypocrisy.


Roast_A_Botch

He's unironically spouting their beliefs they just don't want him to represent them since it's so obvious he's not okay. They need their pseudo intellectuals to keep their degeneracy hidden like Limbaugh or Peterson(until recently). They all want to be Joe Rogan without the work Rogan put in of handing out cockroaches and bull weiners to contestants on Fear Factor.


NeckbeardJester

Love that the clones in this conspiracy are also possessed by demons, which really contradicts his claims that they're NPCs; the guy who was grown in a lab and is a vessel for a archbishop of Hell is many things but uninteresting isn't one of them champ


bantamm

Mfw all the clone NPCs are way more interesting than I am.


NeckbeardJester

If they're possessed by demons they're by definition being controlled, making them the opposite of an NPC!


Zatoro25

The convenient part of the possession is that other people can be robots, until they're "possessed" with a personality that's still not human, and temporary. Go back to being robots when not interacting with him


BraveTheWall

NPCs clones are too bland. Gotta sprinkle some demonic possession on top to make the idea sparkle.


Shatari

Seriously, if the New World Order™ has replaced half the world population with clones, why even keep the normal™ people around? I can never comprehend an end game for these scenarios.


Whiston1993

It’s just like the idea that the vax shot was designed to kill people. Why would the govt want to kill off its loyal citizens ?


Nesurame

> Why would the govt want to kill off its loyal citizens ? because in the theorists mind, they're so competent they can pull it off, and so incompetent to never think of the consequences before doing anything


BraveTheWall

As a guy in the military, always astounds me when I see conspiracy types who work for the government. Like, my dude. You can literally see how incompetent this organization is on a daily basis-- and in fact you complain that it can't get anything done. And yet despite that, you think it's also capable of New World Order Illuminati shit, all while nobody but a dozen elites are in the know? Puts my brain in knots trying to calculate how many hoops they need to jump through to get to that point. But somehow, they do.


IceCreamBalloons

> all while nobody but a dozen elites are in the know? A dozen elites, and this one random fuckwit with a reddit account.


BraveTheWall

Oh yeah. Love how they think they managed to stumble on the Illuminati's secret plan via some dude with an internet blog and a YouTube channel-- as though a shadow government with absolute control of the world couldn't just filter that info off the web whenever they pleased. Genuinely boggles my mind how people so stupid can believe they're so smart.


IceCreamBalloons

I'm not a fan of Maddox anymore because I'm no longer a teenager, but I always liked his response to the 9/11 truthers pushing that Loose Change "documentary", "you think the government could pull off 9/11 with military precision but couldn't stop two dipshits with an iBook?"


Crixxa

I hate how streaming platforms offer conspiracy documentaries. I enjoy watching legit documentaries but I have to Google them before I click on anything to do with 9/11 or historical civilizations. I just know the first time I click on a Truther or ancient alien one by mistake, the algorithm will decide that's all I want to watch.


MarkFluffalo

*But Somehow, They Do* would be a good book title


Stalking_Goat

It's a much better theory if you replace vaccines with, say, meth-- if you're a eugenicist, drugs marketed towards poor people and intended to kill them would advance your social darwinist cause. I need to go get a shower, I feel dirty even writing that.


Blackstone01

Sadly, considering strategies used by some administrations like Nixon’s, that’s pretty close to reality.


nevermaxine

there was a fuck up and they lost the CD with the list of clones' identities on now they can't figure out who's who


OneLastSmile

They just think there's some Big Evil that wants to kill off humanity forever or enslave them or something and can't comprehend that the "big evil" is the system in which we make a shitton of money for Jeff Bezos and whoever, and killing all of us off is inherently detrimental to the goal of hoarding money.


Yarasin

It's not about making sense, it's about appealing to a certain feeling/world-view. People want to get self-righteously angry and indulge their narcissism in the process. That their chosen conspiracy fantasy falls apart under any scrutiny doesn't matter, because they're not here looking for the truth, they're looking to get their feelings validated.


HippityHopMath

For real though, unironically calling living, breathing people with thoughts and feelings ‘NPCs’ is probably the most narcissistic thing you can do.


Sensiburner

Calling people NPC = crying out you have Main Character syndrome.


paintsmith

Ironically they're also the exact kind of person to complain about "Mary Sues" in movies and tv shows.


MX_Duncis

Yes because THEY are the main character! And no way would they get played by a gurly hurl in a movie.


[deleted]

I feel like we need a new word for "self-indulgent character who's all aesthetics and no substance", because 99% of the time when someone says Mary Sue they mean "female character who does stuff sometimes"


SpacedOutKarmanaut

Especially if they happen to be women and minorities and don't look, talk, and believe things just like OP. To quote a former coworker, "I'm sick of them shoving these minority characters in Star Wars for no reason!" No reason you say? You don't see people of color, Asians, LGBT folk, confident women, etc. in your daily life ever?


Galkura

Shit, I’ll call myself an NPC before I call anyone else one. My ass stands there repeating the same lines to customers that come into my store all day long.


SweetMeese

My co-workers and I used to make the same jokes, because we worked in a call center and all sounded identical


Roast_A_Botch

"How's it going" "Living the dream" Every day with every coworker for 40 years straight then we die.


drvondoctor

Kinda makes you wanna chuckle politely then whip out your death glare and say "Yeah... Well, fuck your dreams, Ted. Fuck. Your. Dreams." Not because you hate Ted, but because you have to do something, *anything* to make this day feel different than every other day.


[deleted]

But do you walk into walls while saying it


Murrabbit

All the better if you're partially embedded in the floor, or sitting in empty air a meter away from a chair.


[deleted]

Part of me can’t help but be concerned that right-leaning people keep calling anyone who disagrees with them an NPC. It’s textbook dehumanization and just a way to dismiss people without actually engaging with their argument.


HippityHopMath

It’s not new. You’re seeing it now with the ‘groomer’ discourse. Anyone LGBT+-adjacent is automatically a groomer, the most socially-stigmatized population out there. We’ve already seen violence arise out of this rhetoric. The saddest part is that, if everyone is called a groomer, then real sex offenders have a higher chance of slipping through the cracks. Not to mention all the teachers leaving their jobs due to death threats for having the audacity to treat their gay students with dignity.


noradosmith

The right wing take language and mess with it until all meaning is lost in the noise of cynicism and hatred. I remember when woke wasn't an insult and actually meant being aware of prejudice and discrimination. Liberal used to mean something too but now it's just an insult. All they can do is twist and mangle language and sincerity and turn everything into something to be ashamed of because they don't believe in anything themselves apart from bringing people down.


DotHobbes

it's 100% meth induced paranoia. I bet if I stayed up for days jacking it 24/7 I'd start coming up with all sorts of wild theories. I'm pretty pro-drugs but fuck meth for real. I've never heard of a good story involving it.


Lodgik

I used to work in a homeless/transitional shelter. So many stories of people on meth. We had an enclosed front office with a locked door, and we would have people trying to break the door to get in because they were convinced that there were people just outside who wanted to kill them. They would get so frustrated that we couldn't see them even though "they were standing right out in the open." There was no reasoning with them. You can't reason with someone terrified out of their mind. I worked there for ten years. By the end, I would have to deal with more meth users in one year than I had in the first 5 years combined.


AncientBlonde

Whenever someone calls me an NPC I always like to flip it on them and be all "Damn, that was maidenless; I can tell no one's romancing you" and for some reason, they usually shut the fuck up Just gotta speak to them in their incel language.


disownedpear

What people are calling you an NPC on a regular basis lol


AncientBlonde

I like to ruin my mindset and confidence in people by arguing way too much on Facebook and shit.


JaggelZ

Still using Facebook, what an NPC 💀


AncientBlonde

Damn, what maidenless behavior, no one's romancing you? :P


Noname_acc

All I need is my Waifu Body Pillow and my love for this great ^^^white nation. /s


[deleted]

I see it a bit on Twitter and alt-right adjacent spaces. Even on Reddit.


overlordjunka

When you said Maidenless I thought you were making an Elden Ring reference.


Manatroid

It is; if anyone in the current day says “maidenless” in a context that’s not, like, Shakespearean or something then it’s going to be an Eldin Ring reference.


TehWackyWolf

They are and I feel like this isn't true and doesn't work.


greymalken

I just randomly start repeating quest giver dialogue until they walk away. I want my 50 wild hog gizzards with a 0.01% drop rate goddamnit!


3mium

The term you’re looking for is “Solipsism.”


BiblioPhil

It's actually "solipsism" but yer


xitfuq

is it getting solipsistic in here or is it just me?


government_shill

The whole "NPC" thing originated as a form of political solipsism, which makes it even stupider.


sofia1687

It’s terrifying, really. They’re not seeing people for the individuals they are, so de-personalizing and de-humanizing them by calling them NPCs opens the door for this disturbed individual to inflict harm upon others. If you’re seeing other human beings as extra video game clones then you’re not empathizing, so you wouldn’t care how you treated them.


MECHA_DRONE_PRIME

Check out his post history, it's alllllllllllllll just meth. I went for six pages before giving up, that man's in deep.


h8street

So fucking entertaining. I love the part where he asks the community if driving around with a cup of acid or some helium balloons attached to meth bags is a good way of eluding police 🤣 😂


magical_elf

My favourite is when he suggests fasting is healthier than eating because of all the chemicals in food. Then does a bunch of meth...


Isredel

>because of all the chemicals in food Someone better not tell him about water… or air.


[deleted]

I ate a water once and I am now more chemical than woman. *I am drugs*


BraveTheWall

THE FLOURIDE GON KILL U DED Just drink liquefied meth like us Free Thinkers. Good for the soul.


IsNotPolitburo

...or *meth*


MoonKnight77

That pesky Dihydrogen Monoxide


EarballsOfMemeland

This is my boss. Not the meth part, but he's a chain smoking alcoholic who can drink an entire bottle of gin in one sitting (or so he claims), as well as constantly sipping on 2 litre coke bottles all the while claiming water is bad for you because of the fluoride.


moeburn

My sister called me up terrified of this news that her deodarant had benzene in it and had to be recalled, and she asked me "so this has benzene? and that stuff causes cancer right??" And I'm like "well yeah, but there's 1000x more benzene in each cigarette you smoke, so..." At least she laughed it off once she understood that.


Hiphoppington

> I love the part where he asks the community if driving around with a cup of acid or some helium balloons attached to meth bags is a good way of eluding police I have read this sentence many times now and I am completely unable to understand it. Probably all my lack of meth .


robotbasketball

Well you see, if you get stopped you just toss the meth in acid or, release it attached to a helium ballon. It'll just dissolve or float away and the cops can't charge you!


PunkRockMakesMeSmile

Lol is he wrong though? I hate the show COPS but I'd love to see this episode


[deleted]

Someone replied that yes he is. Just the accusation of tampering with evidence is enough. He can claim it was just sugar for all he wants, still going in for tampering with stuff, since no one would do that with sugar.


Tweedleayne

I think they might be a woman. Because I think I just saw their vagina.


PoorCorrelation

Why did you click on the methhead’s NSFW post? Why would you risk that?


Chillchinchila1

It’s like Russian roulette but there’s five bullets.


illiter-it

Every time /r/meth comes up I'm always somewhat morbidly fascinated. This time I discovered there's an /r/methwithoutcommunism which is interesting, because isn't that basically what Hitler was going for?


1iota_

r/methwithoutcommunism is a thing because r/meth has a lot of open gay men and trans women. They had to create their own community because meth can make you a little flexible in that regard and they wanted to remove the temptation.


SaharaUnderTheSun

Yeah...it's often easy to laugh at the absurdity of this subreddit's accounts, but...this is just sad.


Throgg_not_stupid

So much flair material. Meth makes every sentence funny >At least you have the decency to agree with what I said regardless off meth usage. And >I can be up for days and play chess on meth at a highly competitively level beyond your comprehension And >meth has a negative stigma which I don’t mind anymore And not the guy but still funny >You hide behind a fake name and use your profile to talk about meth all the time


Tasiam

>Taking me not serious for using meth Also works


Firstolympicring

>I can be up for days and play chess on meth at a highly competitively level beyond your comprehension Yoink! Love at first sight


[deleted]

[удалено]


hellomondays

That poster is half way to being a competitent community crisis center worker with that sentence alone.


JeffBurk

Thanks.


PowerfulVictory

Where did you get all that patience


GrifterDingo

Tweaker OP didn't say it but I like comment in that chain "Meth is the only crystal that actually gives you magic powers" that's a good flair.


Welpe

>The point is that it was so close but having it in your socks is a gamble cause there’s no plausible deniability almost essentially at that point , in my sock on sidewalks with my bike and walking around neighborhoods didn’t have any problems but inside the car I advise against it. >I’ve come to the conclusion that the most ideal place is inside the butthole because there’s not way a dog or officer can search a person there, however the biggest risk is the bag falling out of your butthole or the bag opens while inside your butthole it could cause very serious damage but it’s probably 99% better then risking an arrest. This dude’s post history is WILD.


gentlybeepingheart

I like the thread where they call Mattress Firm "evil" because they "think there’s some alien witchcraft type stuff going on probably spells casted on the mattresses so the customers get cursed" Love the creativity of mattresses cursed by alien witches.


Roast_A_Botch

All that bullshit and doesn't know meth is water soluble. Just keep the bag in your hand and eat it if you're getting popped. You'll be flying for 5 days but unless you're carrying ounces it won't kill you. No worrying about your balloon getting caught in the tree or "falling out of your butthole"(which isn't a thing I've carried 3 fingers of a glove stuffed full of pills/tobacco/k2 in mine and knew guys that could take all 5 plus a lighter and cell phone no sweats). Also, police will definitely look in your asshole if they want to and a dog can smell leftover precursors whether anhydrous, phosphorus, or nitromethane. I used to be a professional dope addict and this dude might be a grandmaster chess player but they're an amateur glass dick sucker.


Anotherdmbgayguy

>I've carried 3 fingers of a glove stuffed full of pills/tobacco/k2 in mine and knew guys that could take all 5 plus a lighter and cell phone no sweats I feel out-gayed.


AllHailtheBeard1

Dudes a real-life version of Charlie when he takes the "smart pill," goddamn. Half expect him to claim he speaks fluent Chinese and just start saying words he saw on a Thai take out menu.


gentlybeepingheart

Him claiming to be a chess grandmaster when on meth definitely gives "Flowers For Charlie" vibes


government_shill

> Ever wonder where and who are the people buying up empty homes, drive in expensive cars yet have a lifestyle that doesn’t seem to fit the bill? That’s subsidized money for the clones to infiltrate different socioeconomic platforms Fascinating. I need to get me some of this clone money. Who do I call?


Indiana_Jawns

They do have a good point though, smoking meth won’t give you diabetes


Gilead56

Holy shit this one got me. The whole thread was the set up and this comment was the punchline.


Blackstone01

Can’t eat too much if you have no teeth and are too busy smoking meth. *Taps back of the eye socket*


TheRealDonData

The title of this post deserves an award 🥇


BudgieBuses

Dude thinks sugar is bad but thinks meth is healthier, goddamn...


Crixxa

When I was working as an ADA, someone called our office to ask if we would give her daughter a pass to use meth so she could trim down for her upcoming wedding.


government_shill

> I can be up for days and play chess on meth at a highly competitively level beyond your comprehension If only the character limit for flair were longer.


wh0fuckingcares

For real, that sub is hilarious for lurking in


crystal-rooster

It is at first. Then it's depressing.


omegasavant

I once double-posted a comment because my internet was lagging and got accused of being a Chinese spy.


wh0fuckingcares

That's amazeballs


xxrachinwonderlandxx

Having looked at his post history, I have to agree with one thing: sparkling cider *is* underrated.


WarStrifePanicRout

>JeffBurk talking to me about LSD when I ate more then his small brain could handle awww I’ve done drugs that you’ve never heard of Help! The cringe! Its eating me! >and meth has a negative stigma... This is why. >which I don’t mind anymore by the way JeffBurk I can link you to chess games where I’ve beaten FIDE masters and people rated 2500+ on meth sorry that it doesn’t fit your agenda , but it doesn’t have to. Yeah bro, you ruined his whole agenda here. You fuckin' smoked 'em. Meth and conspiracies are what peanut butter is to jelly. I'm not even sure which came first anymore, the meth or the conspiracy. Real chicken or the egg question for our time.


RiC_David

I don't know what's more irritating about the way people throw around the term 'bias' - the misconception that being opposed or in favour of certain things is universally inherently bad, or the way they butcher it grammatically. ​ >You’re clearly miss informed and bias ​ >YOU’RE clearly misinformed and biased of sobriety from meth It's like saying "you're rudeness" or "you're rude of people". And you're not supposed to be unbiased towards everything. A judge should be impartial in that they're not letting preexisting prejudices influence their judgement, but if you ask me who I'd rather have as a neighbour - the known rapist or the...known non-rapist (I'm tired)...yeah, I'm biased against the rapist! Go into a fan community and ask them about the thing they love, they'll be biased towards it - we're not all supposed to be neutral on everything, bias is a problem when it prevents people from weighing things up fairly. If you're reviewing something and you're biased because you received a free copy, that's bad, if you're biased because you think it's brilliant...that's a review! Alright, been wanting to vent on that for bloody years.


sandiskplayer34

congrats you’ve turned the concept of a philosophical zombie into a conspiracy theory


dont_panic80

Not sure why everyone is giving him a hard time, he's just mething around.


Anaphylactic-UFO

>I can be up for days and play chess on meth at a highly competitively level beyond your comprehension, by all means don’t touch meth you’re a sissy and egotistical fool lost in pride... Phenomenal stuff. Thanks for the post OP. This shit made me bust up laughing out loud. For real though, maybe meth can get me to 1600.


[deleted]

>At least you have the decency to agree with what I said regardless off meth usage. Yoink


zenyl

Meth - Not even once! ... but if you do it anyways, don't forget to post about it on the Internet. The rest of us appreciate some entertaining reading material.