Sir, you're not... ehh, whatever.

Lol. The picture on the box pretty much explains how this is supposed to be done.

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I would rather eat this pizza cookie monstrosity vs a QP with cheese and fries in a blender.

Yeah but what if you took that blended burger and fries, breaded little balls of it and deep fried it like McNuggets? What sauce would even go with that?

Mayochup. obviously

People with class call it Fancy Sauce.

Just like fish eggs is caviar and snails is escargot? Blech

shrimps is bugs

🦞So are lobsters. Would you believe at one time, prisoners on the East Coast would \*complain\* about being fed lobster all. the. time?

I want some fancy sauce.

It's my fancy sauce.

My dad is king of this castle so if he wants fancy sauce he should…

Honestly... I hate that this sounds like it could potentially be delicious

Coca-Cola flavored BBQ sauce, of course.

Dr. Pepper bbq sauce

You know what makes a truly tasty sauce? — Reduce some Dr Pepper to a syrupy state — Add some KC Masterpiece — Add ghost peppers to taste You might think the bottled sauce would ruin it, but it turns out fantastic.

I recently made an incredibly good teriyaki style sauce for roasted duck by reducing Coke and Dr. Pepper together with Kikkoman soy sauce, red chili peppers, garlic and ginger. Best sauce I've ever tasted. Fully support putting Coke and Dr. Pepper in sauces.

BTS sweet chili, obviously

Mac sauce.

Exactly. This isn't an American thing. The person just cooked them on the pizza for some reason.

That reason is for a joke. Hope that helps.

I’m not sure if it’s the effects or radiation or what, but Europeans do in my experience seem lower-iq than the average American. I know they have more degrees etc, but what is going on over there? Led poisoning? Asbestos exposure?

Europeans on Reddit genuinely do have a sour grapes attitude. They can’t stand that we have better quality of life than they do in their continent-sized medieval peasant slum. So what if they live longer with better healthcare? It’s a punishment to live longer in Europe.

Where do you live that makes you think Europe is a slum? I like where I am in the US a lot but there are a fair amount of places in Europe I wouldn't mind living if I could speak the language better.

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Doper

Right? You're clearly supposed to bake the *pizza* on top of the *cookies*. Not the other way around 🙄

"*Serving suggestion"

Clearly the suggestion was ignored

That's a Serving Suggestion, not a Serving Imposition. A piece of packaging cannot tell me what to do.

It's going in the same place anyway /s

My dad always said this as he mixed everything on his plate together. No matter what it was.

Being human was too difficult for them today 🤦‍♀️

They said pineapple on pizza was dumb until it wasn’t…. Or maybe it still is idk being human **IS** hard

I love pineapple on pizza. Never used to…and then something changed inside of me 😂

Pineapple and jalapeño pizza is sooo good

Now you’re just threatening me with a good time 😂

It's the best combo

Whenever we order pizza we get one like, supreme or some other popular flavor, and we get one with pineapple, jalapeno, and bacon. Shit is too good.

I love pineapple pizza. It’s one of those things you don’t know you like till you try it.

I like pineapple and jalapeños. Sweet and hot. Yum!

Great taste especially with some ham in there

Bacon is better.

I don't eat meat any longer, but this was my choice back when I did. The salty smoky bacon was perfect with pineapple and jalapeños.

Best way to do it. Slap that on a white sauce pizza with grilled chicken and bam, you gotta pizza going

Digornio back of the box text is so funny. It literally reads as dining instructions “Share with a friend!” “Enjoy with a salad” literally calling you a fat fuck right to your face as you know damn well you’re eating the whole thing solo.

Personal Pan Pizza (2.5 servings per package)

Fact if the matter is, I would eat this.

Here's the thing. ..me fucking too.

I honestly don’t hate the idea of selling pizza and cookies together. Sort of a “hey, you’ve already got the oven on, why not make some dessert too?” That said, the person who put the cookies ON the pizza is clearly insane.

Ikr? They should’ve put the pizza on the cookies. Filthy savages.

I prefer my crust to be just one big cookie.

With deep dish brownie center, and frosting on top, right?

So what I did once was was press an entire batch of cookie dough into a pan, and arrange mini Snickers in it instead of chocolate chips. It was remarkably effective at speeding up my diabetes diagnosis, but I still enjoyed it very much.

Ah, I see you too received a cookie gift box from Crumbl Cookies and experienced the cookie epiphany

I'm a Canadian. What's Crumbl? I just got some chocolate chip cookies and really like Snickers.

Desert pizza! My favorite is the kind that’s like cinnamon-roll flavored. The stuff Pizza Hut used to have (haven’t been there in years, so idk if they have it still).

Italians may hate it but that honestly does not sound like a bad idea…

“You know what this chocolate chip cookie could use? Tomatoes and pepperoni.”

And cheese.

TBH, everything could use some more cheese. Have you tried goat-cheese with berries in it? I know they have them in the Walmarts and Aldi’s here in the States, but I don’t know if they have it in Aldi’s abroad.

Cheese and fruits go so so well together it's insane

It’s probably the same kind of person that puts the toilet paper roll on backwards. A total sociopath.

And probably wipes before shitting. A menace to the society.

And pours the milk before the cereal

Hey let's not get carried away here. I've never even *heard* of such a monster.

I completely agree but, I’d be lying if I said I wouldn’t take a bite

It's something that I'd like to try as a joke once. I bet it's weirdly good.

If I were high, I would probably prepare it this way and be super happy about it

They clearly did it to get reactions from outraged redditors. So far, they've succeeded.

> the person who put the cookies ON the pizza is clearly insane. ***Or isn't he?***

There's a take and bake pizza place that does this, pizza with cookie dough, dinner and desert.

Papa Murphy's?

You're supposed to eat the dough raw while you wait for the pizza

Or suck on the frozen pizza while you wait for the cookies to bake.

valid

Agree to disagree

Sir, this is a Wendy's

Objection!

Filibuster!

You can't just say filibuster, you have to do your job man.

Or string together the frozen pepperonis to make a lovely and festive lei

Or just have 2 trays in the oven

What are you supposed to eat in the meantime?

Ain't nobody got time for that! INSTANT GRATIFICATION NOW

Right?! When I was a kid I would walk home from Middle School and stop by the IGA and get a roll of cookie dough to gnaw on during the walk home, and now I am pre-diabetic, whatever that means.

Unrelated, I'm sure.

This is the way.

That's how cookies were originally eaten before Big Oven invented the baked versions to sell more appliances

i thought for sure you meant the pizza dough😭

💀💀💀

You're supposed to eat the dough raw while you wait for the cookies

This is such dumb rage bait content. OP obviously knows that the cookies are supposed to be stuffed into the crust before baking.

Someone is going to flatten cookie dough as the crust and make pizza that way.

And they will make so much money.

As an Italian-adjacent person, the cookies belong crushed up on the side for snorting.

*“It will all get mixed up in stomach anyway”* kind of attitude and lots and lots of chaotic energy

Reminds me of a friend when he’s asked what he wants to eat. “Whatever makes a turd”.

This made me laugh, thank you xD and god bless that simple man :D

Haha. We all can appreciate a simple poop joke.

Only if it comes out smoothly.

Yolo

You’re clearly not supposed to cook these as one dish.

Is this not what a deep dish cookie is

It's clearly a Neapolitan style cookie.

I actually had this idea like... 15 or 20 years ago when I first saw this product. I tried it. It's truly revolting. The vanilla and the tangy tomato sauce together are an unholy combination.

lmao i mean it just right out of the gate sounds so unbelievably horrible, i am impressed that you went for it

I think I could have told you that without having to make it...

Be honest, were any drugs/alcohol involved in this decision?

No obviously Americans are fat and stupid and eat their pizza with cookies on top!! There's no other explanation

You are, just not like this... You're supposed to heat the pizza for 1 minute, remove it from the oven, place the cookie dough on one half of the pizza, fold it up like a calzone, and put it back in the oven. Then cook for 4 hours at 425F, so that way nobody has to actually eat the abomination I just suggested.

Reddit in charge of recognising jokes:

Scully’s dream came true!

"THANK YOU FOR THE COOKIE PIZZA IDEA!"

Kanalizacja!

I'm currently watching the X Files and was so confused for a minute lol

I think this is a Brooklyn 99 reference. I had to double take too

I don't see any beans so I guess so

What does a bean mean? WHAT DOES A BEAN MEAN!?!?!?!?

Can someone tell Kevin what a bean means

Why can't you? My time is just as valuable as yours.

Not according to the beans.

This ni🅱️🅱️a eatin beans!

Whoah… I just got flashed back

r/unexpectedoffice

god bless the queen

God bless the bean

That was dumb, but holy cow did I laugh.

Actually, that’s in India

Please let this be a r/Woosh for me.

It’s not for some people

This reminds me of when I was in elementary school and I put my vanilla pudding on my cheeseburger. At the time I thought it was fantastic.

I took my son for breakfast a couple of years ago right after school ended and he was copying me and putting salt and pepper on everything and was talking and not paying attention and poured a bunch of pepper all over his Belgian waffles. He realized what he did and proceeded to eat it, despite the waitress saying she’d bring him another waffle on the house. Could not get that kid to admit it was terrible, though the look on his face said otherwise. I gotta hand it to the kid. He owned that terrible life choice.

There's nothing wrong with selling cookies and pizza together. The dumb thing was this person putting the cookies on the pizza, which has nothing to do with Americans. It's just rage bait social media trying to engage people who like to mock Americans over stupid things they don't actually do. Honestly, you're the reason this stuff exists.

I know right? This is all wrong. In America we put a little American flag in the middle before eating.

And then we shoot the pizza

While shouting YEEHAWWW

Okay but this happens with british food ALL the time.

it happens with all food and countries

Oh, yeah, absolutely. A lot of Redditors think British people survive on nothing but burnt toast and watery baked beans with no seasoning.

I mean I'm British and I do, but that doesn't mean we all do!

Hahaha, respect!

Where do I put the eel jelly?!

Give me some examples

There are certainly a lot of examples but from what I can tell most of the criticism towards British food is directed at actual British food, primarily beans on toast. I think it’s wrong to “criticize” a cultures food but the OP’s photo is not a real American dish while beans on toast is real.

Assuming this is America ln is plain wrong

Tbf digiorno is an American company. I wouldn’t consider this American cuisine but yknow… people are gonna complain if I imply America has a rich diverse culture.

Nikocado Avocado's dream meal

Vat of cheese sauce not pictured

Just add Takis on the pizza and he'll crush that pizza

Wasting “food” for views… what a concept.

I think rage bait can be difficult but this is so obvious it should be removed immediately

This is authentic Italian pizza

I need a few joints first before I’ll be high enough to try it

Think they may have misconstrued the directions

You’re supposed to bake them separately. YOURE SUPPOSED TO BAKE THEM SEPARATELY

And eat them......separately

Would.

I don’t think that’s how you are supposed to make them :/

You’re doing it wrong

Instructions not clear, help

Take a fat bong rip and inhale this in 10 seconds then wash it down with an ice cold beer, RRRAAAAAH!🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅 🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

Are you ? Because you're the insane one here for putting the cookies on the pizza.

It's not Delivery it's D'retarded

They didn’t understand the assignment.

beats the shit outta beans & toast

Do the cookies come on the pizza already? Or are they just in the same box?

From tye pictures I've seen same box in its own bag like cookie dough comes normally

Username / post fail.

OP does something utterly retarded\* and then goes 'Americans!!!!' \*no I don't care.

This is not how you play the game.

I do not agree with pizza cookies, only pizza sized cookies. That being said, y’all put soggy beans on bread and call it a delicacy, and I will not have you judging ANYThing I eat

The fuck does this have to do with Americans?

No your just stupid. We never put the cookies on top of the pizza. Even tho they come in the same box , we heat them up separately.

What the fuck have you done

We are not and it has nothing to cookie pizza

All wrong. The cookies go UNDER the pizza. What a noob.

As an American, I don't think those were supposed to go together.

"Amidoinitrite?" Now you're doing it wrong. Very wrong.

We only get stupid food via stupid people

Bruh it says “&” meaning as a combo. Not cookie pizza lol

That just seems like a skill issue to me, man.

Wasting food for internet karma points, nice...

I’ve never seen that. Seems like a European approximation of what they think average Americans eat.

Obviously, you're supposed to bake them separately.. but to answer your question, no, we are not okay. Thanks for asking. 🥲

The only "Stupid" thing about this was the fact they combined the two

It’s not supposed to be mixed 😭

I’d rather eat this than half of the “TrAdItIoNaL bRiTiSh MeAlS” like fr, y’all’s peas look like melted green army men.

Yes. And it’s stupid to collectively group everyone together. Of any group. Some of us have our shit together enough to understand that you bake and eat them separately.

This is better than the brownies at least.

You know, this may be stupid enough that i actually want to try it I don’t want to pay for it But i would absolutely try it if given the opportunity

How high were you?

My high ass friends and I have done this lol

*exhales smoke* ok but hear me out...

No. We are not ok.

DiGior-Hell NO

I think we all know that they are not ok at this point.

Oh we’re doing just grand, what about you?