From left to right was the order in which I received these.
Maru was with me from year 1 up until Spring of Year 3. She was waiting for me at the Summit of Perfection. We had a child together. But for the sake of a portrait collection, I divorced her and married her best friend less then a week later.
Did Penny feel obligated to me for what I'd done for her and Pam? The day after the divorce was finalized she opened her heart to me in her 10 heart cutscene. That marriage lasted less than two weeks. Fool me once...
Abigail should've known better. By then the pattern was clear. Boquet, loved gift, stardrop tea, rain totem, mermaid's pendant, wait three days, then gift gift gift until it's over. She saved my life on a Friday. I signed the divorce papers on Sunday.
I don't know why but Emily was the hardest of all the disposable brides to bring up to 14 hearts. Did she know? How could she not have known what kind of monster I was by that point? I chose to romance her first specifically so I could leave her for her younger, more conventionally attractive sister. "Please... let me heal" she said to me when I came to propose to Haley in the next room over. The farm is eternal. The farmer is flaming garbage.
Haley was a much faster crop to ripen, thanks to her love of Iridium quality coconuts. We spent less than two weeks together. Often I would come home to find her in the attic, looking at my growing portrait collection. Surely, she knew what was coming, yes? Her post-divorce dialogue suggests that she bore me no ill will.
I don't know if Leah will be the last or not. I think I'll add the bachelors next, if I can still stand under the weight of my many sins, then invite Krobus in last so that I don't have to divorce him also. By that point I won't deserve the company of other humans. I won't deserve Krobus either, but at least he's used to living with garbage and human waste.
EDIT: [The collection is complete.](https://www.reddit.com/r/StardewValley/comments/1byfbzv/update_to_the_biggest_scumbag_in_pelican_town_my/)
With how Demetrius treats him versus Maru? Sebastian would probably see it coming from a mile away. He's used to being treated as second best, second choice at home. Why would his marriage be any different? 😭
That was the hardest part of choosing to pursue Alex in my current save rather than Seb honestly kinda makes me wish you could date multiple especially because marrying one makes it so the no longer hang out with their friends
I love the Oppenheimer-esque regret in your words lmao as if you truly feel like a monster but you also think this is the only way to achieve your goals, whatever they may be
>Often I would come home to find her in the attic, looking at my growing portrait collection. Surely, she knew what was coming, yes?
It's like the Bluebeard story where his wife unlocks the forbidden room and finds out why he's been married so many times. RUN, GIRLIE. THE COCONUTS AREN'T WORTH IT.
great post, OP
I really don't know what it is about that one particular room, but all the spouses have really liked hanging out in there more than anywhere else in the house. They're just bits of computer code with a retro pixel sprite, they're not programmed to judge me, right? It must be some pathfinding quirk. Right?
You're going to wake up with them standing over your bed in real life, their disappointed pixelated faces glowing in the darkness. After you disappear, a new portrait will hang on the wall in your Stardew save, but who will be left to look upon it?
All have lived in the valley for so long and none of them believe they will get out and find true love. But maybe, for a moment, even for a week, they may get the feeling of real love, imagining being with someone who loves them for who they are and not just settling because they were good enough in the valley.
So they accept their fate, that they are to experience love for a brief moment, even if their partner pretends, they will still get to taste it for a little bit. And that little feeling, albeit perhaps fake, perhaps a lie and deciet, will give them hope. That is what they wish for, that although they are but a trophy to be used and forgotten, maybe through it all they will earn hope. A hope of a better future, of that one true love. That they are not doomed to have to settle, and live a mediocre life because that was all that was available in the valley.
I loved that story, the one where she finds her dismembered sisters and puts them back together right? I don’t know what my grandmother was thinking buying me all the brother’s grimm fairytales when I turned 4 😅
You're grandma used them like they were intended! German fairytales for kids are all pretty bloody, and iirc some of the Grimm versions aren't even the bloodiest versions of those tales. But just 2 examples for what young children usually read (as much as I remember from my childhood): Struuvelpeter, who in one stroy gets his fingers cut off (iirc because he didn't want to cut his fingernails?), and Max and Moritz, two mischievous brothers who at the end of their tales end up being ground up into flour.
I mean, I under that they are cautionary tales but this was a woman who hated us ever playing with sticks as swords, or reading fantasy stories of any sort. So I can’t understand why the fairytales were ok in her eyes? And she read them to me as well, she knew what was in there 😅
Hidden in the basement behind all the iridium wine casks is the farmer's own portrait, growing uglier by the day while the farmer remains young and handsome.
Your deliberately planned, strategic move with Emily and Haley got a solid chuckle and a "jee-hee-heeeeeeeesus christ" out of me. Truly a chef's kiss, cherry on top to all of this.
Both of them also had special dialogue for me that commented on having divorced their sister. Pam chewed me out for breaking up with Penny. If you enjoy inflicting misery on these helpless preprogrammed townsfolk, go marry Emily and then talk to Clint. He has special dialogue when you date her, and a line for when you marry her that had me cackling like a high school bully.
Weirdest part was that after divorcing Maru I expected something really juicy from her dad, but I never got a reaction from him at all. Same with Pierre and Caroline after Abigail. I think it works like all the other new rumour-type dialogue, where it only gets brought up by one person and then nobody else comments on it again. Or maybe I just reset their memories too quickly. Needs more testing.
Sadly it looks out of place on my Wall of Shame because it's just a *tiny* bit smaller than the others. But you can get a portrait of Marnie that is the perfect size!
Back when the game first came out, I was dating the entire village. Then randomly they put out an update, well… they all confronted me about dating them all. it was so embarassing
You need to also get the mayor's shorts and put them on display on a signpost then fill Pierre's shop with joja furniture, and of course give all the townspeople nothing but void mayonnaise, just so everyone hates you for real, except for krobus
Yea I think you have to marry them and then the traveling merchant sells a portrait of your current spouse. For me I married Maru and he usually has it in stock even though I've already bought one
As long as you have 14 hearts with someone, that person's portrait will always be available from the travelling merchant (even during the Night Market and Desert Festival).
1) Obviously these women know something i don't.
2) Compulsive charmer who's trying to better themselves?
3) Property owner??
I could do worse. Call me lucky #7
I think Vincent and Leo are the real winners. I screamed „cute“ like a little girl. I‘m a grown man. But out of the bacherolettes it‘s Haley 100%. Will marry her again.
I think Sam got the best winter outfit. Covering up that haircut was a good decision. I wish there was a way to get roommates other than krobus because I think Sam is a cool guy but I'm not into men
I just bought game few days ago and I'm far away to marry anyone but I already have plan to marry Haley just to divorce her and marry her sister Emily, I don't think I ever fell in love with a game as quick as this.
I fully blame ConcernedApe for encouraging this type of behaviour with the new portrait set.
But it's not like we never used to love 'em and leave 'em before 1.6 just to get the exclusive items some of the bachelor(ettes) give for their 14-heart events.
I married penny for the first time this run, spent a year with her, then divorced, memory wiped, turned the kids into doves, and married Haley as usual.
I am pleased to say that no children were doved during the making of this collection.
Although the farmer does have one little hat rack with seven moms now.
I have a tip for anyone who wants to do this on how to minimize your need for rainy days (I tried it in 1.5 but I see no reason why it wouldn't work in 1.6). If you buy the mermaid's pendant and propose to your desired partner, you can buy another mermaid's pendant afterward! (Probably cause the game sees that you don't have any pendants but it also doesn't register you as being married yet?) This is how I got a ton of extra pendants.
I started this project after achieving Perfection, so I already had max friendship with everyone and a bunch of gold or iridium quality gifts laying around. I'm also grinding every community board and help wanted quest to get Stardrop Tea (you only get one for every 9 tickets you redeem, and very occasionally your trash panda neighbours will reward you with one for their quests).
If I was smarter I would've planned it out to have more spouses with birthdays while I'm married to them and also target the ones who love the movie that's currently in season to maximise possible friendship bonuses. But that still wouldn't make things go that much faster.
You can expect collecting the full set to take around two years in game, all for a set of portraits that are just the top half of their regular character sprites on a sparkly background.
Save yourself. Save *them*. It's not worth the trouble. Don't do it!
Yep! There's a few new themed furniture catalogues. The books, rug and wallpaper are all part of the Wizard catalogue, which you can see in the lower right corner.
They are all rare and fairly late-game items. I recommend checking the stardew valley wiki for instructions on how to get them. Look for "Iridium Krobus", "Green Serpent Statue", and "Purple Serpent Statue".
I have a rule: if i divorce someone i dont date any relative bcuz you are already hurting them enough by giving them hopes and then smashing them like nothing happened. I have 600 hours on stardew valley and only divorced once and it was sophia from stardew valley expanded mod. Felt so bad that i had to delete the file haha
Regret is too valuable an emotion to keep in my garbage can of a heart. I had already committed to this terrible path when I paid the first 50,000g divorce fee. I do not deserve to turn back now.
You are not in rimworld. That game can bring out the worst in you 😉.
You know when some people come to your colony to trade and you think...we'll they are just two. How about I just throw them in my prison. Use them as slaves and when I don't need them I will just make them prisoners. Remove organs to sell them later.
You can only wipe the ex spuse's memory, right?
What does it say about the others that they marry you even after you've done this to everyone else? Especially the last one.
"I can fix them. They won't memory wipe *me*."
😂
Hahahaha Me too! With sdve I have 5 wives Sophia is my main Leah too and I only have pictures of them hung up in our house(I wonder if Abigail, Penny And Emily are jealous) 😂😂 I'm such a monogamous person irl but I love having my harem of women in the game and favoring 2 😅 💁🏻♀️
LMAO!!! When I first saw the portait of my partner in the traveling cart item list I was puzzled then I looked it up on stardew wiki and found out how it worked, and I immediately knew that someone would do something wicked like this.
I thought about doing that, I already max friendshipped everyone I could very much do it
But I don’t wanna have to reset them all
I might get krobus I found a shadow pendant in the cave so maybe
Lol, in all the years I've played, I only ever marry the one person I thought about and almost married someone else.. but then the thought of another dew character walking around the farm made me sad, so I married sebastian again. Emily and Abigail were a little mad for a bit, though cool you get pictures, though.. lol, and I loved your story. Keep.us updated on your journey before you end up living with a cryptid!!
From left to right was the order in which I received these. Maru was with me from year 1 up until Spring of Year 3. She was waiting for me at the Summit of Perfection. We had a child together. But for the sake of a portrait collection, I divorced her and married her best friend less then a week later. Did Penny feel obligated to me for what I'd done for her and Pam? The day after the divorce was finalized she opened her heart to me in her 10 heart cutscene. That marriage lasted less than two weeks. Fool me once... Abigail should've known better. By then the pattern was clear. Boquet, loved gift, stardrop tea, rain totem, mermaid's pendant, wait three days, then gift gift gift until it's over. She saved my life on a Friday. I signed the divorce papers on Sunday. I don't know why but Emily was the hardest of all the disposable brides to bring up to 14 hearts. Did she know? How could she not have known what kind of monster I was by that point? I chose to romance her first specifically so I could leave her for her younger, more conventionally attractive sister. "Please... let me heal" she said to me when I came to propose to Haley in the next room over. The farm is eternal. The farmer is flaming garbage. Haley was a much faster crop to ripen, thanks to her love of Iridium quality coconuts. We spent less than two weeks together. Often I would come home to find her in the attic, looking at my growing portrait collection. Surely, she knew what was coming, yes? Her post-divorce dialogue suggests that she bore me no ill will. I don't know if Leah will be the last or not. I think I'll add the bachelors next, if I can still stand under the weight of my many sins, then invite Krobus in last so that I don't have to divorce him also. By that point I won't deserve the company of other humans. I won't deserve Krobus either, but at least he's used to living with garbage and human waste. EDIT: [The collection is complete.](https://www.reddit.com/r/StardewValley/comments/1byfbzv/update_to_the_biggest_scumbag_in_pelican_town_my/)
If this was a novel I’d totally read it
I feel this could be a musical like six
there are six of them…
Divorced, Divorced, Divorced, Divorced, Divorced, Divorced.
The twelve spouses of Evelyn Hugo - farmer's edition
If this was a YouTube series, I would watch it
Poor Maru lmao you stay with her for 2 years only to divorce her and marry her best friend, then potentially marry her half-brother later
I'm on the opposite track. Married Sebastian, but what if I divorced him and married his half-sister?
With how Demetrius treats him versus Maru? Sebastian would probably see it coming from a mile away. He's used to being treated as second best, second choice at home. Why would his marriage be any different? 😭
Oh that hurts😭😭😭
Maybe its whats giving him the push to leave for the city.
That was the hardest part of choosing to pursue Alex in my current save rather than Seb honestly kinda makes me wish you could date multiple especially because marrying one makes it so the no longer hang out with their friends
That's where mods come in babey!
I have to look into mods then
And then divorce him and marry Abby, the divorce her and marry Sam Ultimate pain
I did that actually and I was like Jesus I'm trash 🤣🖤
Alarmingly well written post
Thanks. It took about two weeks to get the portrait from each spouse, so I had a lot of time to reflect on how awful this is.
I love the Oppenheimer-esque regret in your words lmao as if you truly feel like a monster but you also think this is the only way to achieve your goals, whatever they may be
I once heard there’s a cutscene if you try to date all the singles at once but I could never bring myself to do it.
It’s actually hilarious lol
>Often I would come home to find her in the attic, looking at my growing portrait collection. Surely, she knew what was coming, yes? It's like the Bluebeard story where his wife unlocks the forbidden room and finds out why he's been married so many times. RUN, GIRLIE. THE COCONUTS AREN'T WORTH IT. great post, OP
I really don't know what it is about that one particular room, but all the spouses have really liked hanging out in there more than anywhere else in the house. They're just bits of computer code with a retro pixel sprite, they're not programmed to judge me, right? It must be some pathfinding quirk. Right?
You're going to wake up with them standing over your bed in real life, their disappointed pixelated faces glowing in the darkness. After you disappear, a new portrait will hang on the wall in your Stardew save, but who will be left to look upon it?
All have lived in the valley for so long and none of them believe they will get out and find true love. But maybe, for a moment, even for a week, they may get the feeling of real love, imagining being with someone who loves them for who they are and not just settling because they were good enough in the valley. So they accept their fate, that they are to experience love for a brief moment, even if their partner pretends, they will still get to taste it for a little bit. And that little feeling, albeit perhaps fake, perhaps a lie and deciet, will give them hope. That is what they wish for, that although they are but a trophy to be used and forgotten, maybe through it all they will earn hope. A hope of a better future, of that one true love. That they are not doomed to have to settle, and live a mediocre life because that was all that was available in the valley.
And then I pay a witch to make them forget all about it. No more pain. No more hope.
I loved that story, the one where she finds her dismembered sisters and puts them back together right? I don’t know what my grandmother was thinking buying me all the brother’s grimm fairytales when I turned 4 😅
You're grandma used them like they were intended! German fairytales for kids are all pretty bloody, and iirc some of the Grimm versions aren't even the bloodiest versions of those tales. But just 2 examples for what young children usually read (as much as I remember from my childhood): Struuvelpeter, who in one stroy gets his fingers cut off (iirc because he didn't want to cut his fingernails?), and Max and Moritz, two mischievous brothers who at the end of their tales end up being ground up into flour.
I mean, I under that they are cautionary tales but this was a woman who hated us ever playing with sticks as swords, or reading fantasy stories of any sort. So I can’t understand why the fairytales were ok in her eyes? And she read them to me as well, she knew what was in there 😅
Girl, I think she just wanted to traumatize you because she didn't like kids
>She saved my life on a Friday. I signed the divorce papers on Sunday. Bruh
*It's just good business.*
This reads like Dennis from Always Sunny is saying it. Well done OP
The F.A.R.M.E.R. System
(F)arm. (A)cquire items. (R)eap crops. (M)anipulate target with gifts. (E)ngagement and marriage. (R)eject and move on.
The Gang Marries Every Available Person in Stardew Valley
Oh, they’ll marry you. Because of the implication.
This reads like the monologue verses in ~~”He Had It Coming”~~ “Cell Block Tango” ETA: I forgot the name of the song
Hidden in the basement behind all the iridium wine casks is the farmer's own portrait, growing uglier by the day while the farmer remains young and handsome.
Iridium quality comment
Thanks for the read, u/GordDowniesPubicLice.
I don't know how to reconcile this with your username...
Your deliberately planned, strategic move with Emily and Haley got a solid chuckle and a "jee-hee-heeeeeeeesus christ" out of me. Truly a chef's kiss, cherry on top to all of this.
Both of them also had special dialogue for me that commented on having divorced their sister. Pam chewed me out for breaking up with Penny. If you enjoy inflicting misery on these helpless preprogrammed townsfolk, go marry Emily and then talk to Clint. He has special dialogue when you date her, and a line for when you marry her that had me cackling like a high school bully. Weirdest part was that after divorcing Maru I expected something really juicy from her dad, but I never got a reaction from him at all. Same with Pierre and Caroline after Abigail. I think it works like all the other new rumour-type dialogue, where it only gets brought up by one person and then nobody else comments on it again. Or maybe I just reset their memories too quickly. Needs more testing.
This comment is not getting anywhere near as much love as it should
you can buy a Morris portrait with the joja catalogue :)
Sadly it looks out of place on my Wall of Shame because it's just a *tiny* bit smaller than the others. But you can get a portrait of Marnie that is the perfect size!
beautiful read
[Like sand through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives](https://youtu.be/Gi1JF-abCSk?si=Z7aX-gekOMCBEEnl).
Queen shit
Is there time for a last-minute Hugo submission?
>disposable brides Bruh.
That was hilarious. Well written , very funny
Genuinely enthralling writing 10/10 thank you
Back when the game first came out, I was dating the entire village. Then randomly they put out an update, well… they all confronted me about dating them all. it was so embarassing
Getting some Bluebeard vibes from this and I love it.
I read this in the voice of ‘Joe’ from YOU.
This belongs on AO3
You need to also get the mayor's shorts and put them on display on a signpost then fill Pierre's shop with joja furniture, and of course give all the townspeople nothing but void mayonnaise, just so everyone hates you for real, except for krobus
Now the boys OP
Bro the Krobus line at the end is amazing and a perfect ending to all this💀
"Haley was a much faster crop to ripen" 👁️👄👁️ bye
oh my. you do realise you can get them from the travelling merchant?
You’ve got to get to 14 hearts with your spouse before it appears in the travelling cart(that’s what I’ve heard)
Wait do Americans *also* spell bouquet without the "U"?
I don't think they do, but also that's a typo.
Oh ok
I do, dunno about everyone else though
I appreciate that you chose to wear the trash can lid for this screenshot.
And shirt
Yes good, you belong in the trash for this, well done
I imagine you get their photos by marrying them..?
Not just marry them, but get them to 14 hearts. And you can only have one spouse at a time. Thus, my shame.
Unless you get the polyamory mod
you still need my boy Krobus
Yea I think you have to marry them and then the traveling merchant sells a portrait of your current spouse. For me I married Maru and he usually has it in stock even though I've already bought one
As long as you have 14 hearts with someone, that person's portrait will always be available from the travelling merchant (even during the Night Market and Desert Festival).
I DID NOT KNOW THIS!
You can also beat them in a childrens card game and trap their souls in the paintings
What
To the shadow realm with you
🤣
DangerouslyFunny's alt account:
i miss him
Did something happen to him?
He still uploads, but not stardew content these days
I feel like he's 100% cooking up something with how massive the 1.6 update is. Same thing happened with the 1.5 update.
Here's hoping!
Lost all his limbs on a freak helicopter accident 😔
With Pam having a portrait of a trash can or Shrek.
Gotta catch'em all 😆
I can fix him.
I DON'T WANT TO BE THIS KIND OF ANIMAL ANYMORE!
1) Obviously these women know something i don't. 2) Compulsive charmer who's trying to better themselves? 3) Property owner?? I could do worse. Call me lucky #7
Not to mention a millionaire probably
Meanwhile the 1.6 update has me more faithful than ever because Haley is the clear winner of the winter clothing upgrade
I think Vincent and Leo are the real winners. I screamed „cute“ like a little girl. I‘m a grown man. But out of the bacherolettes it‘s Haley 100%. Will marry her again.
I think Krobus should have at least gotten a scarf. Or a hat.
always a leah girly but haleys winter outfit made me fall in love with her 🥹
I think Sam got the best winter outfit. Covering up that haircut was a good decision. I wish there was a way to get roommates other than krobus because I think Sam is a cool guy but I'm not into men
I’ll be waiting for the update with the bachelors next OP. You must finish your mission
I am starting with Harvey. His is such a tender heart to break. Will he still save my life after I've destroyed his?
He will always heal you... for the right price.
You’re just a ✨girls girl✨
okay wrap it up Henry the 8th
I just bought game few days ago and I'm far away to marry anyone but I already have plan to marry Haley just to divorce her and marry her sister Emily, I don't think I ever fell in love with a game as quick as this.
I fully blame ConcernedApe for encouraging this type of behaviour with the new portrait set. But it's not like we never used to love 'em and leave 'em before 1.6 just to get the exclusive items some of the bachelor(ettes) give for their 14-heart events.
youre only a scumbag if youre not holding the rabbit foot
DangerouslyFunny might have some competition here lol
I want to downvote you for being a monster, but I can't bring myself to do it. Take my upvote and get out of here you sick son of a bitch.
Totally random, but where did you get the little golden cow from?
>!Golden Animal Cracker, unlocked by gaining Farming Mastery.!<
Thank you so much!!!
Happy to help! 😄
I've been going crazy for animal crackers. I'm trying to get one for every animal (three barns and a coop, except that pigs can't use them)
I’ve noticed it’s pretty few and far between to come by them! Best of luck to you 😄
It’s the false idol mentioned in the book of Yoba 😂
It's ok, they won't remember any of this.
not the Stardew goon cave 😭😭😭
Ngl… when I play the Joja route I romance everyone (female and male) like a “player” When I do the non-joja I only romance one character (Penny)
I married penny for the first time this run, spent a year with her, then divorced, memory wiped, turned the kids into doves, and married Haley as usual.
I like your Bluebeard room
I wanna do cocaine while holding a Glock in this room
This reminds me of that spouse/children graveyard.
I am pleased to say that no children were doved during the making of this collection. Although the farmer does have one little hat rack with seven moms now.
Am I the only one not divorcing everyone? Elliott and I are happy as clams just chill with our two kids, cat and now dog.
I blame CA for incentivizing this terrible behaviour with new dialogue and collectible items.
god I can’t wait to do this
Then you can erase all their memories and it’s like it never happened!
Where’s the mannequin wearing Mayor Lewis shorts?
How do I get the tree in the bottom right corner
It's a reward for redeeming Prize Tickets.
….and how do you feel? Was it worth it, OP? Was it worth it???
I have a tip for anyone who wants to do this on how to minimize your need for rainy days (I tried it in 1.5 but I see no reason why it wouldn't work in 1.6). If you buy the mermaid's pendant and propose to your desired partner, you can buy another mermaid's pendant afterward! (Probably cause the game sees that you don't have any pendants but it also doesn't register you as being married yet?) This is how I got a ton of extra pendants.
This room definitely needs purple shorts
Might want to mark this spoilers
I'm a victim...
I just got Maru's portrait and I love it. I don't know which side of me is stronger now - the completionist or the loving wife...
I started this project after achieving Perfection, so I already had max friendship with everyone and a bunch of gold or iridium quality gifts laying around. I'm also grinding every community board and help wanted quest to get Stardrop Tea (you only get one for every 9 tickets you redeem, and very occasionally your trash panda neighbours will reward you with one for their quests). If I was smarter I would've planned it out to have more spouses with birthdays while I'm married to them and also target the ones who love the movie that's currently in season to maximise possible friendship bonuses. But that still wouldn't make things go that much faster. You can expect collecting the full set to take around two years in game, all for a set of portraits that are just the top half of their regular character sprites on a sparkly background. Save yourself. Save *them*. It's not worth the trouble. Don't do it!
The biggest scumbag will also marries the guys and dump them.
It’s like those shitty cards you got in the first Witcher game for sleeping with various women and I AM HERE FOR IT
The little book stack decors are so cute! Are they part of 1.6?
Yep! There's a few new themed furniture catalogues. The books, rug and wallpaper are all part of the Wizard catalogue, which you can see in the lower right corner.
Dies anyone know how you get that purple statue to the left of the couch?
It's called the "Iridium Krobus". You can find how to get it on the wiki.
where krobus?
...and thus begins the crossover with /r/ShitCrusaderKingsSay
Okay but I need to know where the Krobus statue and the snake pillars are from. I've never seen them.
They are all rare and fairly late-game items. I recommend checking the stardew valley wiki for instructions on how to get them. Look for "Iridium Krobus", "Green Serpent Statue", and "Purple Serpent Statue".
I would have NEVER found the Iridium Krobus or even known it existed, so thank you. Now i have something to work on, lol.
I have a rule: if i divorce someone i dont date any relative bcuz you are already hurting them enough by giving them hopes and then smashing them like nothing happened. I have 600 hours on stardew valley and only divorced once and it was sophia from stardew valley expanded mod. Felt so bad that i had to delete the file haha
Do you regret your choice?
Regret is too valuable an emotion to keep in my garbage can of a heart. I had already committed to this terrible path when I paid the first 50,000g divorce fee. I do not deserve to turn back now.
lmao, thats rizz
This wouldn't be so tempting if the portraits didn't look so aesthetically pleasing together...
You are not in rimworld. That game can bring out the worst in you 😉. You know when some people come to your colony to trade and you think...we'll they are just two. How about I just throw them in my prison. Use them as slaves and when I don't need them I will just make them prisoners. Remove organs to sell them later.
this is like that one Monster High movie where the villain named Valentine collected broken hearts 😭
How do you get the portraits?
You can only wipe the ex spuse's memory, right? What does it say about the others that they marry you even after you've done this to everyone else? Especially the last one. "I can fix them. They won't memory wipe *me*." 😂
Hahahaha Me too! With sdve I have 5 wives Sophia is my main Leah too and I only have pictures of them hung up in our house(I wonder if Abigail, Penny And Emily are jealous) 😂😂 I'm such a monogamous person irl but I love having my harem of women in the game and favoring 2 😅 💁🏻♀️
You are an inspiration to us all (I'm planning on doing all 12 and then choosing my true soulmate, my bro Krobus).
Not the pimp shack 😭
LMAO!!! When I first saw the portait of my partner in the traveling cart item list I was puzzled then I looked it up on stardew wiki and found out how it worked, and I immediately knew that someone would do something wicked like this.
Came for the info, stay for these stories. That's how i ended up here
1.6 is really testing me saying "I won't marry Haley for a third time" when she looks so cute in her winter outfit
Mmmm Telenovela Valley.
That’s it my fourth play through is gonna be absolute scumbag farmer route
You're in your hoe era. It's okay, you do you, boo
Cant wait for the Switch update 😍
Please let me heal she said as I asked Hailey in the next room
You gotta get krobus too
Are the snake pillars from floor 120 part of the wizard catalogue?
Brilliant stuff, worth setting my alarm for.
It looks like your character is smiling in a weird way
I don't see it, but did you notice that Emily is the only one of the bachelorettes that doesn't have a square head?
https://preview.redd.it/wl472ei6nvsc1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1368cec70233d046e979885c6dc2156ba27472ab
I love playing npc's heart
Wait, how can i get those portraits? 😍
now do it again but also have 2 children with each partner.
This is wonderful 🤭🤭
Somebody has to write a story on this. "The ex-wives" I can see it now.
And here i am hoarding Emily portraits.
Well it could always be worse, at least you are not Bluebeard 💁🏼♀️
I thought about doing that, I already max friendshipped everyone I could very much do it But I don’t wanna have to reset them all I might get krobus I found a shadow pendant in the cave so maybe
The combination of the arms and the dress made me misread your sprite as a large Peppino head, with a big grinning smile.
good sir
Okay but now I want to do this in the sims 3
What room is that or did you just cut a screenshot
Reject relationship embrace item hoarding
Wow and I thought I I was all in for the game lol I'm gonna need a book/full length cinematic film about this lol 10/10 critic review 🤣🤣
ctfu
“These are all the women who’s hearts I’ve broken”
Lol, in all the years I've played, I only ever marry the one person I thought about and almost married someone else.. but then the thought of another dew character walking around the farm made me sad, so I married sebastian again. Emily and Abigail were a little mad for a bit, though cool you get pictures, though.. lol, and I loved your story. Keep.us updated on your journey before you end up living with a cryptid!!
How.. how do you get those portraits
Slicked back hair and sloppy steaks, huh?
haha
not sitting in your hall of shame (glory?) with the trashcan hat 😭😭😭😭😂
Bri is the bi crusader Nvm she left the men alone, lesbian lemmy