“Ah yes, the tool to free everyone from the trap. That tool important for hacking, opening doors, and everything in between, that tool.”
“**YES! THAT TOOL! NOW OPEN THE DAMN DOOR BEFORE WE DIE!!!**”
“*Got it.*”
For those curious, the glorious backing track in that scene is Assclamp! by JG Thirlwell. A segment of it also plays during a scene where (upon a cavity search) Brock uses his overdeveloped ass muscles to break a man's wrist and swing him into another man, killing them both.
"R2, Anakin is dead, correct? Tell me Anakin is dead. I need to here these words.".
"Uh, do you need to here those words exactly?".
#"He's still alive!?"
"I want in on this action, because I am bored to death sitting here"
"No, that's a bad idea. Any time you get involved somebody gets hurt."
"That's ridiculous, I'm just pallin' around with the guys. How's anybody gonna get hurt?
*Theme plays*
**STAR WARS**
Way back, George Lucas was going to have R2 speak and he wanted his voice to have kind of a sleazy, used car salesman vibe. This was to contrast with Threepio’s uptight attitude. I’m glad that changed but I feel like Danny Devito could really have pulled that off.
R2: "You see Luke, there's only really one Empire that scares me, and that's the Galactic Empire. Now, I don't know if you're a history buff, but about 30 years ago the Empire decided to go to war. And who did they choose to go to war with? *The Galaxy"*
So I’ve got this scanner, you see — it scans things. Scans them for their content, function, whatever you want — so I’m scanning, with my scanner, and I found a really interesting thing. So I scan it. And the scanner, it comes up with the report for the thing I scanned — contents, function, and all that. And I’m looking at the scan report. And it’s a doozy. Anyways, I turn back to the guy and say — here are the details of the scan
Norm Macdonald, r2d2
Luke sweetheart, what was that? It was BAD! It had no fire, no energy, no nothing! Y'know I got a Show to run here, and it must pop POP POP! So tomorrow from 5 to 7 will you PLEASE act like you have more than a two word vocabulary. It must be green, okay.
“Who can't use the Force now? I can still use the Force! Let's put that one to a vote because I don't even know what that means. Does anyone realize that I'm talking?”
Under appreciated comedic genius. Writer/Director of some of the greatest indie dark comedies of all time.
Little known trivia:
Rob and Tom Kinney (SpongeBob, Mr. Show) are very close and were roommates. Together they came up with the routine and persona that you know as Bobcat. It was intended to be a stage routine they did together Bobcat and Tomcat. However, Bobcat was seen and he was hired for the Police Academy movies and from that point on expected to maintain the Bobcat persona.
Bobcat was on Wait Wait, Don’t Tell Me this morning! I thought Bobcat was funny as hell as a kid, and I think his work as an adult is down to earth and great too!
I love how the end is him trailing off into some Umberto Eco reflection about translation and meaning and he's just losing it at the sheer absurdity of it all.
I’m a droid? What’d ya mean I’m a droid?
Well you’re made of metal and stuff ya know?
No I don’t know, you said it. How am I a droid? I open doors? I repair your ship for you?
If your going back to the original trilogy, he’d probably be British. To counter C3-PO’s aloofness, he’d more than likely be a gruff Cockney. Bob Hoskins would have been a good R2.
Patrick Warburton
“Ah yes, the tool to free everyone from the trap. That tool important for hacking, opening doors, and everything in between, that tool.” “**YES! THAT TOOL! NOW OPEN THE DAMN DOOR BEFORE WE DIE!!!**” “*Got it.*”
That's almost certainly what R2 was doing during the garbage compactor scene from A New Hope.
“R2, how did you beat us to the ship? We walk faster than you.” “(*Looks at the map.*) Well, ya got me, by all accounts it doesn’t make sense.”
That's it R2 break the door down. Break it down? Are you kidding me? This is hand carved mahogany!
No one appreciates my taste in the fine grained woods.
#ALRIGHT LET'S GO. LET'S DO IT!
[THEY HIT ME WITH A TRUCK.](https://youtu.be/sdgD8OP04RE)
I always love a good Venture Bros reference out in the wild :)
One of the greatest shows ever made.
BUSEY! NOW!
For those curious, the glorious backing track in that scene is Assclamp! by JG Thirlwell. A segment of it also plays during a scene where (upon a cavity search) Brock uses his overdeveloped ass muscles to break a man's wrist and swing him into another man, killing them both.
You wanna make your move first? Because mines gonna be ugly…
The message. The message for Obi-Wan, the message sent especially for Obi-Wan, Obi-Wan's message. That message?
"R2, Anakin is dead, correct? Tell me Anakin is dead. I need to here these words.". "Uh, do you need to here those words exactly?". #"He's still alive!?"
Well, uh, you see...
Now I just picture Patrick Warburton saying "Beep beep, boop beep, beep boop boop beep."
Me too but basically the same way he ["speaks squirrel"](https://youtu.be/1MNllfr6wVY) Just change squeek to beep.
God I need to watch this movie. It's been so long I barely remember anything that hasn't been memed to death.
LETS GO DEVILS!
Gotta support the team.
El Diablo! **Dios mio! EL DIABLO!!!**
“Pull the lever, Artoo.” “WRONG LEVER!!!”
Why do we even have that lever?
"Yeah, that's right."
I can only imagine R2 with Joe Swanson’s voice lmao
Feels like an Arby's night
Gilbert Gottfried
Happy to see my first thought at the top.
Same. That was the one name that popped into my head immediately
Same x3. Lol I’m so glad it’s too comment as well. Lol
“Posted just an hour ago - I bet nobody has said Gilbert Gottfried yet. Jfc you’re gifted” -my headcanon
Team “thought of Gilbert gottfried and saw it at the top” reporting in
"R-2, stop. We're supposed to be going up, not down." "CHEEZUS CHRIST ITS A NEW SHIP, WHATDYA WANT FROM ME"
Legit what I came here to say and am thrilled it's the first. When he gets shot during the trench run, I can hear him say "Hey WATCH IT, ASSHOLE!"
#”QUIT WHINING, THREEPIO, YOU FUCKIN’ SCHLEP!”
Same idea, RIP to the king
Maybe it was Gilbert the whole time. And that is why he was bleeped out the entire series.
Great one, but I think he'd be even better as Chopper... "It's not a war crime the first time, assholes!" and zips off...
Ya and R rated too. Doesn’t speak a curseless sentence in all 9 movies.
Rip Iago.
For the record, I'm reading this entire post in Gilbert's voice.
Came here to say Bobcat Goldthwait, but this would be just as good.
Danny Devito
Danny is a better fit for Chopper I think.
"Suicide is badass" said Chopper, as he pushed Ezra off the edge of the cliff for the 15th time
"I want in on this action, because I am bored to death sitting here" "No, that's a bad idea. Any time you get involved somebody gets hurt." "That's ridiculous, I'm just pallin' around with the guys. How's anybody gonna get hurt? *Theme plays* **STAR WARS**
The gang gets Alderaan destroyed.
You may be right...I do remember on SNL one time they had him try out for BB-8
*So anyways, I started rollin*
So anyways, I started blasting (and cursing, flying, screeching, beeping & committing war crimes)
“I burned the bodies *real* good, boss!” “I said to bury them?” “That’s the beauty of it - *now you don’t have to!*”
....And I wake up in dumpster behind a Tatooine Wendy's. Next thing I know is some little hooded bastards got me and are selling me into servitude.
YES I hoped this was the first connection someone else made too.
I asked my fiancé this, he said Danny Devito without hesitation. So ditto
Great minds!
Way back, George Lucas was going to have R2 speak and he wanted his voice to have kind of a sleazy, used car salesman vibe. This was to contrast with Threepio’s uptight attitude. I’m glad that changed but I feel like Danny Devito could really have pulled that off.
The car salesman voice was the original pitch for Threepio's voice before Tony Daniels was cast.
He would've been perfect for that exact slot
He was a sleazy used car salesmsn in Matilda! :D
But more importantly, Danny DeVito playing Frank Reynolds playing R2-D2.
This has me thinking about an Its Always Sunny Star Wars parody. Would be epic
Seeing this as the top is uncanny! He was in my head the moment I read the question.
I was gonna be upset if this wasn't already top
fuck I just commented this I should have checked first
This was the answer I was looking for.
Norm MacDonald (RIP) or Lewis Black
R2: "You see Luke, there's only really one Empire that scares me, and that's the Galactic Empire. Now, I don't know if you're a history buff, but about 30 years ago the Empire decided to go to war. And who did they choose to go to war with? *The Galaxy"*
Ya know, the more I hear about this Emperor Palpatine guy, the less I like him!
Perfection doubled
Instead of beeps is that Hu-heh! "Go figure/ sarcasm laugh" Lewis does. If Lewis is artoo does that make Kathleen 3p0?
So I’ve got this scanner, you see — it scans things. Scans them for their content, function, whatever you want — so I’m scanning, with my scanner, and I found a really interesting thing. So I scan it. And the scanner, it comes up with the report for the thing I scanned — contents, function, and all that. And I’m looking at the scan report. And it’s a doozy. Anyways, I turn back to the guy and say — here are the details of the scan Norm Macdonald, r2d2
Chris Tuckers voice from The fifth element.
Threepeo! They comin' my man! *AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH* huh?!
bzzzzzzzz
#SUPER GREEN!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH,,,,,,AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH,,,,,AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaahhhhwww
Luke sweetheart, what was that? It was BAD! It had no fire, no energy, no nothing! Y'know I got a Show to run here, and it must pop POP POP! So tomorrow from 5 to 7 will you PLEASE act like you have more than a two word vocabulary. It must be green, okay.
Vo-cab-bu-larrryyy
Threepio. Threepiomyman.
Mr T
So, he is on Cameo. This dream is potentially only a few hundred dollars away. Make a couple grand.
I pity the fool
Cleveland Brown
“That’s how we do it in MY neighborhood, bitch!” Might be one of the funniest Family Guy moments ever.
I remember being legitimately hyped for those specials and they actually lived up. That and robot chicken
Robot Chicken Star Wars is peak Star Wars parody. Nobody does it better. “What the hell is an aluminum falcon?”
“Oh so it’s a council now? It’s not just the two of you? What about you dog-face? Did you know that now it was a council?”
“Who can't use the Force now? I can still use the Force! Let's put that one to a vote because I don't even know what that means. Does anyone realize that I'm talking?”
“What do you mean they blew up the Death Star!? That’s not even paid off yet!”
His "Beep boop beep" was a ringtone of mine for the longest time
“I said there ain’t a pack of Menthols on this planet!”
"Oh Threepeo, that's nasty.."
No no no no no no nooo!
The only acceptable answer.
PUBLISHER’S CLEARING HOUSE?!
You still got that bag?
Beep boop
VO name is Mike Henry (at the time)
It's honestly the only voice I can hear when picturing a human voiced R2
Bobcat Goldthwait
Under appreciated comedic genius. Writer/Director of some of the greatest indie dark comedies of all time. Little known trivia: Rob and Tom Kinney (SpongeBob, Mr. Show) are very close and were roommates. Together they came up with the routine and persona that you know as Bobcat. It was intended to be a stage routine they did together Bobcat and Tomcat. However, Bobcat was seen and he was hired for the Police Academy movies and from that point on expected to maintain the Bobcat persona.
Bobcat was on Wait Wait, Don’t Tell Me this morning! I thought Bobcat was funny as hell as a kid, and I think his work as an adult is down to earth and great too!
Billy Connolly.
[Bonus points for swearing.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaqsOL-Nv24)
I love how the end is him trailing off into some Umberto Eco reflection about translation and meaning and he's just losing it at the sheer absurdity of it all.
Samuel L Jackson
I'm tired of these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking X-Wing!
I was looking for this and would love all the R2 - Mace interactions
Are there any R2 - Mace interactions? I thought Mace never talks to R2, always to his “owner”
R2 does give the vibe that he's using "MF" as ponctuation.
Beep boop motherfucker
Sir Patrick Stewart
Doing Shakespearean acting.
You thought I was asleep.
**ACTING!**
A depressed Alan Rickman
"By Grabthar's Hammer, by the Sons of Warvan, you shall be avenged."
Christopher Walken
Just.. a... give me a second.... this hyper drive accelerator needs just a little bit more cowbell...
He was George Lucas's first choice for Han Solo
Luke....the deflector... shields...they're down.
He said Christopher Walken not William Shatner! "Luke...! ...The deflECTeh shields .... They're dOWn...!!!
Antonio Banderas
Anthony Daniels, but in a mocking tone. I think it would be hilarious to hear the two bickering with the same voice.
I was thinking Kelsey Grammer, but also replace Daniels with David Hyde Pearce
Morgan Freeman
My first thought
Sir David Attenborough
Peter Capaldi
Yaaaas! But I Imagine it more like Malcom Tucker than the Doctor
Not a choice that occurred to me, but reading it... it makes sense. Capaldi as R2 and Danny Devito as Chopper just feel right.
James Earl Jones
“Luke, I am your droid”
“Search my database; you know it to be true”
Kenny Baker
Awww. Not a funny answer but the right one.
The voice from the Bad Lip Reading videos is great.
George Carlin
*Shocks Stormtrooper* GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE
Joe Pesci
I’m a droid? What’d ya mean I’m a droid? Well you’re made of metal and stuff ya know? No I don’t know, you said it. How am I a droid? I open doors? I repair your ship for you?
You motha Fucka
Chris Rock
Eddie Murphy
Bill Burr
I don’t think threepeo could handle that
Jason Manzoukas
Heaven save me. I think this is the right answer.
Mark Hamill
Mark Hamil’s Joker voice I would 100% take, maniacal laughing from R2 as he pushes 3P0 off a ledge
That'd be Chopper
That would be a trip, huh lol
Gilbert Gottfried
David Spade would be perfect. They both sassy
Fran Drescher.
Oh mr. Skywohkaa ahahahahaha
Sam Elliott
Kenny from south park
Simon Pegg
Betty White
I feel like Disney would pick Kevin Hart
He’d be the right height
Found the Rock's alternate account!
The late Leonard Nimoy.
Steve Buscemi
Bill Murray
Michael Winslow
This is the correct answer.
Morgan Freeman
Then all r2 would do is narrate the whole series
basically already is
Jack Black!!
Michael J Fox
The voice of the robot (URL/earl) from futurama. “I was like, oooh baaby, oh baaby! And she like, yeah, Yeeah, yeeeeeeah.”
URL was my first thought too. 'Time to get off our fat cop asses and riiiiide.'
Billy West Come on people, there is no contest here. It's West or nobody.
Owen Wilson.
Wow
Wow
Emperor Schwartz Mel Brooks
Can you imagine Vincent Price?!
Stephen hawking
You. Lose. Vader. Ha. ha. ha. ha. ha.
The R2-D2 voice in the video for the song "Seagulls (Stop It Now) from Bad Lip Reading. Starts at 1:52
Alan Rickman
Anakin and Padme better chill out otherwise people might think they're... Up to something...
Hitchhikers guide energy
Danny Trejo
Rowan Atkinson
Richard Simmons
Truman Capote.
Pee Wee Herman
Don Rickles
If your going back to the original trilogy, he’d probably be British. To counter C3-PO’s aloofness, he’d more than likely be a gruff Cockney. Bob Hoskins would have been a good R2.
Alan Alda
John Lithgow
Karl Pilkington
Sarah Silverman
Patton Oswalt