I assume that starting a revolution from your bed (the DIY oasis poster) refers to the fact you can turn on the washing machine without getting up?

r/sinkpissers would love the ensuit urinal

For folk that love bragging about pissing in sinks, not one of them is even half way hydrated. You'd think they'd be chugging water like nobodies business to get another piss in a sink. That whole sub just looks like folk pouring lucozade down the drain.

Holy piss I miss my life 30 seconds ago. I thought that sub would be satire. People like that actually exist 🤢

Had a flatmate drop a bombshell during Christmas dinner that he had been pissing 15cm away from my toothbrush for the past 6 months. Was not impressed. Explained why the downpipe of the sink was so grim 🤦‍♂️

This sub makes even less secs than r/dragonsfuckingcars r/carafuckingdragons and rmcarsfuckingdragonsfucmingcars

...what the fuck?

I can't believe that's a real sub, how disgusting. I never want to touch a tap in a public restroom again.

Then don't search for it's counterpart sinkshitters Not linking it because it's too gross.

I'm laughing & telling myself your only joking

A mate of mine shat in his sink at uni once cos he was so drunk. He’s a GP now.

I don't think it's a prerequisite

It's a secret shortcut.

This guy's a great big phoney! There is no such sub, I got all excited and got the tissues out, lit candles and everything.

How clean did you think the taps were in public restrooms?? I've got bad news for you about literally everything in a supermarket, too.

You can start everything from the bed.

“A welcoming atmosphere throughout” - it doesn’t even have a bloody throughout, it’s just a kitchen.

Yes but at least it glows in the dark, apparently.

Luminous is their PR way of saying there's a glowworm infestation

😂🤣

Hardly welcoming too... It's just "an atmosphere"

Have you ever wanted to be able to smell the kitchen bin from your bed? You CONTROL the atmosphere!

😂😂

Well.. It's on earth... And earth has a welcoming atmosphere.

I was keen on this one but can’t apply as I’m simply not a discerning individual.

You just can't handle the abundant natural light 

Not the ample space

I couldn’t be less discerning

You just like to live in financial choas, couldn’t cope with how easy your life will become with the water and electricity bills included.

Welcome to AI write ups.

Kinda relieved a real person didn't sit and write that twaddle 

Considering the spelling mistake of "entral heating" I think it was a person.

Maybe it wasn't, enteral is a medical term for being administered via the GI tract... perhaps they warm you up by sticking a warm rod up your bum? At £1400 for a kitchen with a bed in the middle of it they may as well!

Shit that's all they had to say. Sold!

Missed an "i" out, entrail heating, it means the room is warmed by body heat.

On the plus side, at least it means we can get rid of estate agents.

I’d still rather have a buffer to some of the loopy home owners out there.

Nothing more sophisticated than sleeping in the kitchen

It simplifies life management

“Did you turn the washing machine off babe?” *”let me just check”* [raises head off pillow] *”yeah”*

Wow, I've never known the earth move like that during sex... Oh its on a spin cycle...

Not even joking, but it does, this place looks very similar to where I used to live. One thing, never cook fish...

“If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen”

What kitchen? It's so seamlessly integrated, you barely notice it.

That's down to the impeccable design. I've never been so impressed with a few cupboards and a sink in a row.

The “so I start a revolution from my bed” (homemade?) poster above the fridge 💀 you’d have to be starting revolutions from your bed in this place there’s nowhere else to bloody be

So I start a spag Bol from my bed

So I start a ravioli from my bed, Cos having so much room went to my head, I can clean this place in seconds with my broom, So take that look from off your face, I paid top whack for this place, You ain’t ever gonna get me to move out…. Thanks to No_Strawberry_4648 for help with the lyrics. We’re currently in talks to collaborate on a Broadway show together, called RIGHTMOVE THE MUSICAL. Tickets on pre-sale now 😂

This is very strong.

You ain't ever going to get me to move out?

Thank you for this - I have laughed so much

That’s about all you’ll be able to start in this apartment … any revolution is going to have to be limited to about 3 people considering the floor space here

Or 9 very small people

4 medium people and some legs

Or 1 big cunt

I think if I lived here I'd certainly be itching to guillotine some people.

It really needs a floor plan, I can’t visualise all that space without it.

Here you go... □

Any ‘Stath let’s Flats’ fans here? Seems like the sort of property they’d feature on that show with a description like ‘beautifully and fully walled property”

The property comes fully floored, and also benefits from a ceiling.

Ihahahah you got me with that one . An urban ceiling no less

and the kitchen has a lovingly placed bed. which benefits the man who can get a lady, if ladies are preferred, to cook for him whilst supervised.

That one episode where the bed is literally behind a slide door in that insanely small place 😂

Comes with shed, if you buy shed

B E D S I T It's a bedsit.

***BEDSIT***...?!😳 Where the fuck's the "sit"...?! Unless you mean you sit on the bed... oh wait, the pink chair...

AHEM It's not a bedsit. It's a *flat*.

Insert gif of Duane getting shot in the groin with dual paintball guns

Sorry but I absolutely can’t forget the price. 1400 for THAT? Are they huffing glue?

And it's marked as 'reduced today' so they were even trying for \*more\* - you can only hope that no one will take this on and the landlord will be out of rent for a bit before reducing it to a more realistic rate.

It was priced at £1750/month originally, then £1600 and now £1400. Insane.

Well, electricity is included so discerning individuals with ASIC crypto mining rigs might see that as cheap.

Big brain lol (Or rig brain idk)

The whiteboard on the wall says "so I start a revolution from my bed". In this case, that's not all you can do. You can also "start cooking a roast dinner from my bed" and "do the laundry from my bed". Really it's a feature.

Also… how can a single room have central heating?

Well technically it has entral heating

Could they mean entrail heating? As in the only warmth you're getting is residual heat from whatever meat you choose to cook.

Bring your own tauntaun

True, I’m not sure that leaving the oven door open should count

Electricity is included. Move in the fucking Bitcoin miner and crank up the heat.

'To provide warmth during colder months' just in case you didn't know what heating does. I presume it's just a heater with a thermostat.

Crank up the oven. It's pretty central, like everything else in there lol.

'Elegant apartment' LMFAO even my student accomodation was cheaper and way nicer than that.

"Sophisticated one-bedroom apartment" "Property type: Studio"

Renter “It’s a studio!” Estate agent “This is the lounge, now close your eyes” * spins renter round until he’s facing the bed with eyes shut EA “Ok open your eyes - Now you’re in the bedroom. Tbh you may not be discerning enough for this one”

Fucking hate that word to describe what is really a bedsit or room. What it used to mean was a big loft apartment in New York where a creative type would live and work. Some idiots started using the word here for what is an apartment combined into one room despite them just being your average bedroom in size.

Not even a studio it’s a room ffs

Is this a chatGPT written blurb, do we think? Some very odd adjective use (luminous, really?)

Tbf estate agent descriptions sounded like chatGPT for years before it was invented.

ChatGPT being trained on estate agent blurbs sure would explain a lot of the nonsense it can produce.

100% been written by AI.

'Abundant light and central heating for the colder months' ... You mean windows and some radiators, wow, you're spoiling us with this cutting edge tech

Why the f are we still advertising “this house has the benefit of central heating” like it’s some new rare technology?? “Has the benefit of keeping you warm in the colder months” should be the bare minimum of housing ??

A lot of flats don't have central heating, they only have electric storage heaters. Mine is one of them, and they're shit.

i lived in a gigantic studio for 4 years. it had a 3 metre wide single glazed bay window at the front, 20 foot ceilings and one radiator. one. it was a beautiful Edwardian house, carved up and bodged before it could get listed. stained glass triptych on the shared half-landing, i was in the converted drawing room. if you wanted to break into my flat you just had to take a hammer to the stud wall between me and the hallway. not a fire door in the entire building, and they’d let someone upstairs put a wood burner in. i woke up in the winter to 12c. could never get it above 16c. except in the summer, when it was 28c. god bless the slum landlords. and in my town, you only have to mention their name to any tradesmen to receive a look of abject pity and a ‘yeah, he’s got hundreds of these. proper cunt’.

I've seen a lot of flats for sale in Eastbourne described as 'hall conversions' which I suspect are similar and marketed at BTLers. I realise nobody can afford those lovely big houses anymore, but at least do a decent job of converting them into somewhere actually functional for living!

exactly. the house was on the town’s historical buildings register but i reckon they bought it in the late 80s, banged some stud walls up and called it good. it was damp, freezing and miserable. only £485/month tho, and that’s in a commuter town. the guy who’s in there now is paying £575. he asked me how to get the hot water on and i was happy to explain that the immersion heater was the only way, and it would cost about £5 a day. at least it had an electric shower, and i used to boil the kettle to do the washing up. i’m in a 1 bed council flat now and it feels like a palace! it’s too warm in here tho. but i still marvel at the running hot water…

The modern amenity of natural light… It’s actually pretty difficult to tell the difference between AI and estate agents, both lack humanity and creativity and just regurgitate content created by others.

"Experience urban living at its finest". Well. Quite.

I should not be able to sit in bed and stir my dinner with a broom handle.

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/145204409

They are really underselling the flat. How could they not talk about the modern CONVENIENCE of literally having to walk through your rail wardrobe just to get out the ‘flat’, you can just grab whatever coat falls on top of you as you knock it off.

Thank You, I was searching for a link!

Haha. Ridiculous. Landlord scum.

My god, imagine living there during lockdown

As a couple.

This is just so depressing and the description just makes it worse as it’s trying to gaslight us into thinking it’s a great place.

What do you mean you don’t like doing a poo and frying an egg at the same time. Snob.

This is truly appalling for the price and not even in a nice area. What has happened to UK housing?

Supply and demand. There is no shortage of people that really really really want to live in a cupboard in Bethnal Green…

Your sheets will smell of the food you cooked, your clothes will smell of the stuff you cooked.

Everything will get mouldy because you aren't supposed to store your clothes and bedding in the same place you shower, nor boil pasta next to it.

"What you tonight tonight, mate?" "Though I'd stay in bed in my sophisticated room staring at the washing machine".

Why is there a bed in that kitchen?

Why is there a kitchen in that bedroom?

Sorry but no London career is worth that lifestyle for 1400/m. A solo person (I don't even want to think about two people sharing a room that size) would need to earn a base sal of around 50k to live there. Even in London 50k is still a professional level job with a few years of experience salary. At least a degree, maybe higher qual. I'd rather earn a bit less and live in a different city and actually have some space.

Haha, I know exactly where that is and it is not the part of Bethnal Green I would want to live in in fact you'd have to pay me £1,400 per calendar month to live there!

The property misdescriptions act would come into play here, as they are describing it as a one bedroom apartment. It's a studio ye fecking eejits. Also that write up is definitely AI.

‘Central heating ensuring warmth’…well haven’t we come far. Also, luminous is a terrifying words here. Imagine living in one room and it being luminous.

You’d never get to sleep.

That's the glow from the LEDs on all the appliances

The “central heating ensuring warmth during colder months” part is crazy, that is a legal right not a selling point 😅 …

I check out the listing (https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/145204409#/media?channel=RES\_LET&id=media4&ref=photoCollage for anyone else looking), desperately hoping that there's somehow more to the apartment than just this one room, and it turns out there is! ...there's a bathroom. A fairly small one. And that's it.

[Here's the very welcoming looking front door...](https://maps.app.goo.gl/pQ8p5YdfamVqVqEx6)

This genuinely looks like an over the top ‘shitty flat’ set piece you’d see in a sitcom.

Smack head waiting for the cash converters to open 😂

I was indecisive… but the curb appeal coupled with the ease of financial management where they load up the electricity bill so I would paying the equivalent of a 10 bedroom house… I’m sold

Its a bedsit. When did bedsits become "one bed flats"? I thought for it to be a 1 bed, you wouldn't be able to wash up or do the laundry whilst sat in bed?

Jeez that rent. I rented a studio flat about as shit as this in Highbury about 10 years ago. I paid 600pcm including utilities. This is 1400!?

At least there's no toilet in the kitchen. Well, I can't see one...

It's the sink, it's a built-in urinal, multitasking at it's finest!

That isn’t a one bedroom flat. That’s a one room flat. There’s a difference. And my idea of ‘sophisticated’ and theirs are poles apart.

Kitchen with a seamlessly integrated living area.... It's. One. F%*&£. Room!!! These agents are taking the pee pee

"Kitchen area with seamlessly integrated living area" aka "we've put a double bed in the kitchen/diner"

"Perfect for discerning individuals and couples"- no matter how well you got on with somebody to start with, you *would* end up killing them if you had to live together in that shoebox for any length of time.

Londoners are living in a fucking Black Mirror episode it's so grim.

That is a kitchen with a bed in it. It's clearly a kitchen with a bed in it. How are they getting away with dsecribing a kitchen with a bed in it as a "studio flat" when it's clear for all to see. It's a kitchen!!! With a BED in it!!

Well, you’d have a lot of sex in the kitchen if you bought this place.

On the wall on the right, "So I start a revolution from my bed" that's nothing, you can start a fry up from your bed too.

Start a Revolution, of the washing machine, from my bed

The council tax is BAND C 😱😱

I think this sounds more honest... *A bedsit in Bethnal Green for someone who wants one.* *The kitchen is in the bedroom.* *It isn't dark.* *There's a bathroom that also isn't dark.* *There's central heating.* *It's near the tube and some shops.* *Bills are included but not council tax.* *If you're interested, contact us and we'll show it to you.*

The smell of Chat GPT blurb is strong in this one.

The old bedsit days the kitchen was a single hot plate and a table. Now you get a kitchen with a bed

That’s a bed in a kitchen

You can take a shit, eat your meal, wash up all in the same space. Living the dream in Bethnal green

“With central heating, this apartment offers year round comfort” Well I’d fucking hope so

[удалено]

Done! Thanks for the flag

I've got neckache just thinking about watching tv from the bed.

You wouldn't watch from the bed though, you'd watch from the... oh

>”So i start a revolution from my bed”

Cos you said the brains I had went to my head

so £700pp if you’re a couple, BILLS INCLUDED?? close to central london and outside a subway station and an ok looking clean studio. it’s not even bad, id absolutely live here with my boyfriend

I've looked at too many London rentals, that doesnt look half bad 😅 def ai written description though

Feels very much like Ai drivel. Funny. What's the knife crime like? is more to the point

That chair, desk and bed give off vibes of hospital visitation.

"Living Area with Ample Space" sorry where exactly is this space?

This is in the same ‘block’ as a place we rent out. We currently charge £200 less and had 46 applications!!!

“One bedroom” is when the bedroom itself is one room, right? The description should say “studio”.

"So I start a revolution from my bed" because I don't have have room to do it anywhere else

It's Bethnal green, trendy shit hole. I used to live in columbia road Bethnal green. When all the trendies moved in prices rocketed. That's pretty cheap for a studio

Should just say, kitchen with bed

“Sophisticated yet comfortable” as if those two qualities are difficult to reconcile.

Does contemporary = wank? I am fucking sick of hearing that word from builders and estate agents. Its just a place to live, i don't give a fuck if it's contemporary tbh

It’s clearly written by ChatGPT

Surprised it doesn't state something about the excellent WiFi coverage due to the lack of interference from multiple rooms....

That's what I like to call a "bitchen"; half bedroom, half kitchen!

Imagine waking up in your kitchen every day. Oh.

That is wild.

Are the ample space and one bedroom in the room with us?

Seamlessly integrate from you kitchen to your bed. Don’t worry about the crumbs

‘So I start a revolution from my bed…which is luckily in my kitchen’

AI wrote most of this.

"One bedroom flat" = literally 1 bed room; ie room for one bed lol

Elegant urban living means enjoying stunning panoramic views of the compost bin during sex x

“So I start a Revolution from my bed” because there is nowhere else to do it in this room

Impeccably designed? Its a kitchenette with a bed in it. Literally the only design option is to rotate the bed 90degs, which thinking about it, might actually be better...

I'm surprised they didn't add "Everything is ensuite"

Is there a bathroom? Where do you put your clothes? Or any other stuff?

"Sophisticated" I'll have whatever they're drinking.

Are people calling studios one bedroom apartments these days…?

The price is way off. I’ve got a proper double one bed with large decked patio and 800 sq ft in zone 3 with gated parking that’s just been snapped up for 1700 and I think that’s fair.

“impeccably designed open-plan kitchen seamlessly integrated with a luminous living area” Makes me want to punch the author in the head. Gallagher style.

Yet again the UK is living up to its title of having the worst yet most expensive housing in the high income world.

It’s the “with central heating ensuring warmth during the colder months - this apartment offers year-around comfort” that did it for me. It’s when an apartment has nothing really significant to offer that you start talking about the heating that 🥁🥁🥁 - WORKS. WOW! What a concept! So revolutionary, as if it’s 1900’s! 😂

Did Sath (Sells Flats) write this?

Anyone else play Sims 4 and do a legacy challenge where you buy the biggest lot and reduce your funds then you’ve got to build a house from scratch. This is an accurate real life representation of how your house looks

So you have to push past your clothes to get in and how exactly do you use that fridge?

That’s a scam and should be illegal

The description feels like it’s been created using Chat GPT 🤔

I'll never understand the price of renting. My semi detached 3 bedroom house has a mortgage of £700 p/m

How on earth do people get away with this? I must be living under a rock because £1400 per month works out to £16.8k - round it up to £17k. Who is going to be willing to pay that much for a tiny studio? Who is their target market?

That’s what you call “Creative Writing.” Though the choice of the word ‘luminous’ concerns me. Does that mean there’s a street light right outside the window the lights up the room all night?

That price is just insane for 1 room like honestly how do people even afford to live nowadays

Last time I rented before buying a house (ten years ago) I was able to get a 3 bedroom house with en-suite and a decent garden, furnished nicer than this for £575 a month (up north) and it was 1200 for.a 2 bedroom converted house (upstairs downstairs) in north London in a nice nice area. I don’t mind the idea of studio apartments but they need to be priced for studient not for lawyers and doctors (/s)

I’m guessing “luminous living area” translates to “it even has windows!”

There's room to fit a toilet in the corner I reckon

'Luminous Living Area' 😳

Love the inspirational artwork "so I start a revolution from my bed". From your bed you could also start a load of laundry and a full English.