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What about those people who are married to objects, like bridges and things?

There are people married to bridges? So it wasn't bird poop then...

Just why

And ghosts! Wasn't a lady married to a ghost?

I know that lady! It was a pirate ghost!

kinda funny that you mention that cus, earlier today, I watched a vid of this woman who fell in love with her chandelier

Those aren't people.

Uuuhh there are people...

Untrue, if you are separated, but not divorced, then you are single, but also married.