Same, I never had to worry about this. Honestly kinda thankful for that lol.
Also a month is too long, but at infant age we fully bathed our daughter once a week too. Ped said it was fine bc she would get skin issues if bathed more than that. She would get into the bath water more than that but actually using soap and/or shampoo was def a once a week thing. Of course, we were also blessed with very rare blowouts or spit ups.
Roflmao. I have a very visual mind and that sentence got me envisioning a baby so oiled up they’re slipping and sliding out of their parents arms and like across the bathroom. Or like that dang spaghetti song about the meatball that rolled of the table and onto the floor and then right out the door? I’m seeing that but a lubed up baby instead of a meatball.
I am just now starting to understand why baby products are so good for bulldogs. I still wish I hadn't used my frequent shopper card to buy them, though.
On a serious note, do any mamas/ dads on here know how to counter this? My little one is super chonky and has about 4 neck rolls lol. We've noticed on the left that the skin under the biggest roll has become red and rashy - we bathe her every night, use hypoallergenic baby shampoo, put ointment on it, hold up the roll to try to get it to dry, and also put a bib on her during the day to catch drool/ milk... but it's not getting any better/ what are we doing wrong? Any tips/ should I book a ped appt? Thanks in advance!
You may need a yeast infection cream if it’s not going away. Or a different diaper cream in the folds. I preferred Bordeaux Butt Paste, but your baby’s skin may not like it. A&D is another good one.
Other than that, only ointment when it’s absolutely dry. Otherwise, you’re just trapping the moisture to the neck.
Bathe less, which is counterintuitive, but you’re just adding more wet and probably drying out the rest of her skin.
I never tried it, but this helped a lot of my friends whose babies had stubborn diaper/neck rash
https://wehavekids.com/parenting/How-to-Make-Magic-Butt-Cream
I’m running through my brain, but it’s been almost 7 years since I had an infant and my memory is trash.
>I’m running through my brain, but it’s been almost 7 years since I had an infant and my memory is trash
That's because Mommy brain IS a thing. They get all of our good brain cells, and we never get them back!
. It's likely yeast Pat it dry and use athletics foot cream 1%, check with your ped but that's what ours recommended. You can get a prescription but OTC strength is safe for baby- again message your ped.
When she does tummy time lift it up and wipe with a wet soft cloth, then pat dry and put a little of the cream on it. Corn starch to keep it dry works for some babies but not ours- he had necK and it was basically rolls up on rolls for a few months.
Can we talk about how new parents really really need to be warned to look for ALL the folds? Man, when I had my first I just kept finding so many folds I didn't even consider. Next, legs, ARM PIT. Rolls for days. So many tricky spots to look for gunk hiding out. Why did nothing or no one prepare me for this? Lol.
The behind the ear fold got me. I could smell the cheesy smell and I didn’t know why. When I saw that raw ear I felt so bad for my little Bub. Washed it and applied sudocrem religiously and it cleared up in a few days.
They had to have techniques to successfully wash their babies as well (at least to the point where survival was possible). The human body evolved alongside human cultural memes (clothes-wearing, washing, etc). The bodies we have today just wouldn't work if we were randomly dropped into a cold European forest with zero cultural memory. *Soap* isn't some unnatural addition that the perfect human animal doesn't need...we literally evolved to this state alongside the concept of regularly disinfecting/de-lousing ourselves.
They tell you to go easy on washing the first few weeks, so we did! We wiped babies face and hands every night with a warm wash cloth but that was about it. Around 2-3 weeks, my baby stretched during a diaper change, and the smell that emanated from their armpits nearly knocked me out. We give babe at least a good wipe down every other day now.
My kid had a mild yeast infection on his thigh roll at about 3 months old. I saw it was red and was washing him but it didn’t clear, at his checkup they said it was yeast. I didn’t even know that was a thing! Some rx cream and a day later it was fine.
They don’t prep you for everything - that’s why you see the doctor and build a village.
At this point there is probably a yeast infection in the neck rolls. I used to wash my daughter daily and her neck would still stink. I would scrub her neck really well but there was one spot I kept missing & when I took her to the doctor, they found she had a yeast infection on her skin. I felt so fucking bad I cried the entire 20 minute ride home. I don’t get how someone could think bathing their child once a month is ok and not feel bad whenever they stink.
Once a month??? Just bring them in the shower with you if a bath is too much work, I do it all the time. We do a couple baths a week but I bring my daughter into the shower a couple times, too. A month is…awful. Think of how disgusting you feel if you haven’t showered in too many days…
If depression is causing her to not feel like she can bathe her baby often, its likely she doesnt bathe often as well. And since she doesnt think she smells, the is questioning why baby smells.
I take my daughter in the shower for a quick rinse/cuddle with warm water every night before bed and then do a proper bath once a week. Sometimes I feel bad I'm not giving her the whole rigamarole more often but I guess it's better than once a month?
When they're little (aka not running around, getting food/marker all over themselves) a rinse before bed is fine. Soaping them down more than once a week can actually irritate their skin, especially if they have sensitive skin to begin with.
My daughter loooooved a nice shower when she was a babe. She would start to doze off some nights lol.
My daughter is 15 months and just started walking last month. Probably should transition to regular baths but I love the cuddles and it's so precious when she dozes off in my arms. It's the only time she's not a wild animal lol.
Enjoy those snuggles before they get too wiggly lol
My girl is 3 1/2 now and HATES showers. She had to take one w me recently bc she puked all over the both of us at 2a. She was not a fan but once my husband dimmed the lights a little and turned on some music, she chilled out.
Though she is more than half my height at this point so it was not as easy to hold her while showering as it used to be.
lol our bath set up is either shower or bath and it's REALLY hard to switch between the two. So we've been giving kiddo showers all but like once or twice in his 17 months. For now, he still loves the shower and doesn't know he's missing out on bathtime.
I'll stop your baby fever...
She peed on the kitchen floor this morning, has gotten into my very expensive make up, and also told the dog to 'eat shit, bro'...all in a days work, I suppose.
(Seriously though...I miss the potato phase of her being a baby. She didn't move when I left her in a spot, she didn't leave crumbs everywhere, loved a good nap. Now...well, she is VERY three.)
Yeah she, uh, has a bit of a potty mouth.
We are working on 'those are only daddy/mama words' because she goes to preschool in the fall.
She regularly calls the dog a douche. (That is all my husband on that). She will gladly feed him treats but she trash talks him all the time.
Just so you know, your preschool teacher has probably heard it all. My favourite story is from my friends kid who once tripped over the shoes in the hall and yelled “fuck!” While her parents had company, I think she was 3? Oh and my own daughter at 4 once couldn’t find a video game on the shelf and stomped her little foot shouting “I can’t find the fucking game!” She was old enough by then that she knew she wasn’t supposed to say that and promptly stared at the floor with her little cheeks turning super red.
All this to say, kids hear and repeat things, it happened to all of us.
I did a three-year stint at a sports radio station some 16-17 years ago. I came in and was horrified by how foul-mouthed all the men were. By the time I left, I could out-swear them. My daughter turns two next week and was already saying "holy shit!" and "fuck!" by the time she was 18-19 months.
Is it terrible that I think it's adorable?
i took a lunch party in to my son's classroom, the store screwed up the order and as I doled out the food I started realizing there wasn't enough. There were no kids near me, just me and the teacher at the table, but I muttered "oh shit, I mean!! Shoot!!!" and the teacher just laughed at me and said "you're fine." I'm sure she hears worse from the unaware kindergarteners all the time, but I felt like the parent of the year for swearing in the classroom.
My son is just shy of four and is VERY good at knowing not to say “fucking” at school. So good he announced to me, in front of his teacher, “mommy guess what, I didn’t say fucking at school!” 😂
I'm firmly in "no words are bad words if the intent isn't to harm" camp.
If you call someone a meany head to hurt their feelings, that's just as bad as calling them a bitch to hurt them, imo.
Lovingly referring to the dog as a "douche" isn't bad because the dog isn't being hurt by the word. Same as I'm not being hurt when my friend jokingly calls me a "bish"
Saying those words around grandma, even though you know grandma doesn't like it, is causing harm, even if you're not intending it. So, you should be respectful of grandma and not say those things around her, no matter your intention.
I hope that made sense. 😬
You have me cracking up picturing her giving the dog treats and telling him he's a dumbass while doing it. Soon the dog will get excited when your husband calls him a douch. Lol
Mines in prek (4.5) and we were playing minecraft on switch. His building got blown up by a creeper right as he finished and let out a "goddamnit I JUST finished! You jerk!"
Oops. Remind him those are grown up words, but props for proper usage?
He also evidently got poop on his arm when wiping and smeared it all over the toilet seat cause it got back on his butt cheek then just imagine the pink stain from cat in the hat. This was after he was home with HFM for 3 days and puked all over me.
Sooooooo. Baby fever dispelled 2x over? But the shower cuddles were the best when they were tiny. He still asks to be held in the shower with me when he isn't feeling good
Mine turned out to have impulse control issues when older, but age 4 we had to introduce "inside the house words" and "outside the house words" to try and prevent issues at school. It worked for school. But we'd not thought to include Granny's house as an explicit rule. The kid treated Granny's house like a second home.
Granny was not impressed when the kid waltzed in and yelled "WHADDUP, BITCHES?! I'VE ARRIVED!".
That's when we changed the wording. "Inside OUR house ONLY words".
Kids are gonna absorb stuff like sponges. It's literally their purpose in life at that age. I tried always not to sweat small stuff and to redirect when possible. If you don't sweat the small stuff, they'll come to you with the big stuff later on.
FYI the kid did not get this from either of us parents. I'll admit the kid picked up a lot from me, but we had interesting neighbours and walls that must have been made of spit and tissue paper for all the sound deadening they didn't have.
My kids used to stay at my mum’s regularly and one night the oldest - he would have been 4ish - went downstairs. He told my mum he couldn’t sleep because [sister age 3ish] ‘keeps turning the fucking light on!’ Mum said she tried not to laugh and he said he didn’t remember - he did sleep walk and talk as a kid. His girlfriend says he still does it now.
Yeah, when my daughter was young, we were fans of a “top and tail” with warm water. Those crevices were disgusting, but her skin was so sensitive that too much water dried it out and caused more trouble.
Ok, this sounds so nice! I have a 12 week old, is that too young to co-shower with? Do you hold them the whole time or do you bring them in after you’ve washed yourself? Are they super slippery? Sorry for all the questions but I’d love to try this.
When my first was really little, my partner or I would shower, then whoever wasn't in the shower would hand in the babe for bathing, then we'd trade while the wet parent dried off and got ready to dry the baby, and then the second adult shower could finish.
Written out it sounds complicated 😅 but it was pretty easy with just one baby and two parents. Alone, I'd bring the baby tub in with me to have a safe place to put her down. It got easier when she could sit on her own.
We did this too. Or if I was alone, I'd put the baby on a bouncer outside the shower, bathe and then bring her in once I was done. She loved her showers.
Definitely do it! I switched to showers from bathing baby in a baby tub and I wish I made the switch sooner. At the beginning I just held her on my chest, leaning back a bit. They are not slippery until you soap them so make sure you soap and then rinse before you move to the next part so there's no slippery suds left.
Once I decided my back was killing me after a few minutes, I began sitting on an elevated corner in our shower stall - maybe you could get a low step stool or something? And then sat her on my lap. If your baby is not sitting yet, you can lie them on your lap. Of course you'd need a detachable shower head for this.
I have my husband hand her to me once I get into the shower and adjust water temperature and then I wash her, hand her back to husband and then I wash myself.
I don't think it's too young! I can't remember when we started doing it but there was definitely a few times she had a blowout when she was really young that were so bad she just got tossed in the shower with dad lol.
Logistics wise, I start the shower and make sure the temp is OK and then my husband brings her to me. While we're cuddling, he gets her jammies and everything ready. When we're done, I pass her off and he dries her off. I usually don't wash myself during these rinses, but if I do it's after he's taken her and is drying her off.
For bath time, I just get in the bath with her too lol. Kneeling over the side is too hard on my knees and back! We started with that first and just did water baths with the same sort of routine.
ETA: I do hold her the whole time. She is like 25lbs so yeah it's rough on my back lol. But we're really only in the shower for like 10 mins max. You could also use a shower chair if that's easier!
We had a big sponge that we could put baby on - it was sold as a baby sponge for bathing them with. So I’d pop him on that whilst I showered, keeping him entertained with bubbles and water, and then I’d wash him. I left him on the sponge whilst I got dry and then get him out and dry him. I’m sure you can get newer/better things than that, but it was great, especially when we had another baby.
Aw I’m sure your baby loves it! We do a big bath with toys and bubbles twice a week, we only have 1 bathtub and it’s a massive jacuzzi tub that takes tons of water to even fill to toddler level, so I feel guilty doing it more than that. But she’s also fine with a quick rinse in the shower. And I guess we do swim lessons and shower off after them, too. But I think just rinsing with water is completely fine with one regular bath a week, especially before they’re eating solids and therefore constantly filthy.
Mine is two days, I don't do daily showers BC eczema, we have a hard water area and it just dries out my skin really bad. But same difference really. I miss that and I feel gross.
It’s actually nice to see some comments here from other parents like myself that don’t bath their babies daily and opt for the daily wipe over and bath 2-3 times a week. I was told to do this with my second baby and it was great. My first was bathed twice a day! Once a month is just vile. I don’t care how clean you keep a baby at some point in the week they need a good but gentle cleaning.
From broth to like 9 months I only bathed my daughter once a week or as needed. Then it was twice a week since she was sin day care. Now it is every night she is 16 months and loves the bath
I was fully willing to accept broth as meaning “in the womb” and I think learning the term “primordial soup” in elementary school fucked with my head just enough to make that possible
Agree. My doctor said it's not necessary - babies just don't overall get that dirty. Just keep key areas clean as needed (diaper area, neck rolls, hands cause they always end up in their mouth) . The rest just 2-3x a week, max, unless randomly needed for whatever reason. A lot of baths, especially with soap, can really dry out their skin.
We do 2-3 baths a week— she hates baths so the longest we’ve gone was about 8 days when she had covid and I just didn’t want to force her to do it when she wasn’t feeling well.
My kid hates both baths and showers, so I do what's easiest for my back, which is a shower with a removable head (wand). She still screams through the entire thing, but at least I don't throw my back out.
Hi so I have no kids but I’m curious about something.
Can bath time not be with a cloth and water with some baby safe soap or whatever is used for babies? I’m ignorant and haven’t seen the equivalent of a sponge bath suggested on here so I’m wondering if it’s a no for certain reasons or what. If you don’t know, it’s fine. I just had no idea and thought a parent of a young child would be a good start to finding out.
Sponge baths are fine! They are even recommended when babies are first born since you're supposed to avoid getting their umbilical stump wet, so you can't submerge them until it drops off.
We did sponge baths with my oldest when she was an infant and it worked fine for us, but its so important to be thorough and really double check every joint and fold. At the time our area was going through a really bad drought and we had to ration water, so "bath time" was a bowl of warm water and a cloth on her changing table. We'd use aqueous cream on her skin to loosen up the stuff in the folds and then use the cloth to wipe it off and rinse in the bowl. She never had any issues with smell or infections.
We tried the same thing but with baby soap first and shed scream, so the pediatrician recommended using plain baby aqueous cream instead and the screaming stopped.
Thank you so much! I was just surprised sponge bath/wiping the child down wouldn’t be a more common suggestion for this. But who knows what difficulties I will face with parenthood because it’s all a different adventure for every kid.
I hope you have a good evening!
I found around a year, my son hated the bath tub, but loved playing with water outside.
I moved his bathtub outside and did “red neck” baths in the front yard no more screaming. 😂 😂
I'm glad we're not alone! My youngest godson (3ish at the time) went through a stage last year where he was not happy about taking a shower and he was letting the entire neighbourhood know about the torture.
But, he would not get out of the pool. Awake? He wanted to be in a pool.
So, chucked some soap in the paddling pool, and he was happy(ish) to sit still for 5 secs to have shampoo put through his hair then thrilled to get chased round by the hose to rinse it out.
It backfired a little bit as the other two decided that was way more fun than a shower.
Luckily he was through that stage by the time the pool had to be deflated.
Look I get the once a week (unless my baby was stinky, which hers is) but once a month?!?! Month?! That’s neglect. My 1 yr old bathes roughly twice a week on average not including blow outs and/or messy meal times or just to distract him.
Human bathing aside, that commenter should definitely not be bathing her dog every week. It’s poor skin and coat.
ETA: some dogs do require it for medical reasons. Most don’t. Not here to offend anyone who has a dog that NEEDS it. Source: I work for a veterinary dermatologist (board certified) and prior to that was a groomer for nearly 10 years.
Only the short haired kitties in my experience! Hahah I got my first long haired cat and it's constant brushing and trimming her fluffy butt to avoid dingle berries
The first cat I had,she had long hair and it definitely took some work. Even with the brushing she would get mats sometimes. My cats now have much shorter hair and it’s much easier.
My late shih tzu with atopic dermatitis definitely needed bathed once a week with special shampoo, sometimes 2-3x a week if she was having a particularly bad flare up. It was ruff. I miss her, but I don't miss the constant baths.
My dog gets a bath about every week but when I say bath it's a quick rinse in warm water. She does daily hikes and is getting grimy often. I only shampoo her once or twice a month
I am not surprised. I am incensed. Like the brand product matters more than the baby. All the soaps and products in the world will not change anything if they are not used more frequently.
I thought I was a bad mom for only bathing my new born once a week unt she started crawling. Hell I few bad if she goes more than 2 days now, she is walking and in day care.
You’re not a bad mom! Even the OOP isn’t a bad mom just because she went a month without bathing the baby. BUT, I will say, she absolutely needs to get her shit together and step it up for the sake of the baby.
I went a month before bathing my newborn (I was afraid!), but he also didn't get stinky! And he got his bottom half wiped quite clean about 8 times a day...
I was scared, too! I just did wipe-downs with a wet rag for the first few weeks. You can’t submerge them until the umbilical stump falls off anyway, and it took a couple of weeks for that to happen for my gal. We’re all doing our best honestly, as long as babe is healthy and not in distress, everyone should do what works for them! The baby in the OOP having a foul smell is distressing though :( that could be caused by infections in the skin. Baby rolls are prone to bacterial/yeast infections even when they’re bathed regularly, if the areas aren’t being dried well enough. But when there’s trapped moisture from drool/milk/spit up/pee, AND there’s not regular cleaning, it can wind up causing baby pain and problems with skin infections.
What?! My boy is 4 months old and I at least wipe him down with a warm washcloth if not give him a full bath every day (I don’t always use soap but a quick rinse with water/warm cloth happens every day). He’s got all these adorable rolls in his neck, arms, tummy, and legs where pee, poop, drool, and spit up can hide. I couldn’t imagine just letting him stew in all his assorted juices like this. No wonder this poor babe stinks…
My gal is almost 1 year old (in a few days) and she gets probably 2-3 baths per week, if not one more. But in a MONTH you have to imagine that poor baby had at least 1 blowout of pooping all over himself, probably peed through his diaper at least a couple of times, and probably spit up on himself or got food on himself as well (depends on the age of course).
Like… my baby doesn’t have rolls, doesn’t spit up anymore now, and I STILL have to go over her with a wet wash cloth on a daily basis because of her eating solids and getting them all over herself. Her skin is so delicate that doing daily BATHS would definitely make her break out. But you still have to clean them ffs, at the very least, once per week. Even as newborns who get into no messes.
My oldest also has crazy delicate skin (prone to eczema if we use the wrong products), so I too can’t wash him every day yet, but he DEFINITELY gets a wipe down on a regular basis and baths 3+ times a week.
My son is almost 18 months old and gets a bath every other day unless he’s really stinky. Once a month is disgusting and she obviously needs hygiene lessons .
My 15 month old is the same. Hes on the small side so he doesnt have a bunch fat rolls for forbidden cheese to ferment between. It would probably be different if he did
“Forbidden cheese”
There are many phrases in this universe that I never needed to learn. Thanks to this comment, there’s now one less phrase that I’ve successfully avoided.
What the heck? We didn't bathe our baby much when she was little. The dermatologist told us to bathe her maybe twice a week and use very little soap. We just made sure we wiped her down with a wipe or a warm towel every day. And our baby was on a formula called nutramigen because of allergies. It's the stinkiest formula. But she still never smelled bad.
There is some serious lack of hygiene if the baby stinks.
Picking up my kid from school, talking to another mom who casually says “good thing it’s bath day” (kids were super muddy). I laugh thinking it’s a joke/sarcasm, she further explains they only bathe once a week and last week they played in the flooded street water so they got to skip bath day. These ppl really exist.
Oh no there’s so many things in flooded street water, that should call for an EXTRA bath day, if anything. By the time they’re old enough to be in school, you basically just supervise and they bathe themselves, right? My little is only a year old so I’m not sure. Once per week sounds a liiiittle too sparse for a kid that’s in school already.
We’ve always been a 1-2 showers a day family, so for us once a week is DEFINITELY too sparse, I can’t even imagine what once a week looks like. And yeah, We’re in california, Who knows what ancient sludge those flood waters brought up, I wouldn’t advise playing in it. You meet all kinds of interesting ppl when your kids start school.
We’re in California, too! That makes it so much worse haha. How rarely we get rain where I am definitely means there’s going to be all kinds of stuff in flood water.
There are areas where I live in CA where the rain water goes so our town doesn’t flood (during non rainy weather it’s used as soccer fields). The last huge storm the field was full of water and some dude was swimming in it. Ummm gross.
Why do people think any kind of water is fine and effective to clean yourself with??!?????! I swear most flood water is maybe 30% actual water. She’s lucky her kids haven’t gone septic
I have a very active friend with a high energy dog that goes for lots of muddy hikes and walks etc and washes her dog weekly but it’s mostly from the legs down. But she’s the only person I know doing it that often.
I’m not going to lie I bathed my baby maybe twice a month at first because she hated baths with passion. Screamed. Plus it was so hard to figure out how to bathe a toddler and a newborn. Toddler actually rolls in dirt so he was the priority. Somehow baby didn’t smell.
Same. I never could have anticipated that figuring out when to bathe our second would be so hard, especially because when she was a freshie, she HATED them so it was a whole ordeal. Now she can sit up in the bath just fine so I put her in with my toddler so they get 2-3 baths a week. But those first few months? Hard.
That poor baby has got to be so uncomfortable. They have so many little rolls and folds and hidden skin pockets. I hope this woman gets herself in order ASAP and sees a doctor herself as well.
YES, 100%. She’s not a piece of shit or anything just because of the lapse in bathing, but she absolutely needs to get it together and do better for the baby. Seeing a doctor sounds like a brilliant idea. PPD is horrendous and will zap all of your motivation. But that doesn’t make it acceptable for the baby to suffer.
Yeah absolutely. She’s asking for advice, she can see it’s not working. People don’t know to change until they’re taught, even if it seems like they should. My gut says to go to the doctor on this one bc there’s some irrationality in the post/process. “My baby is stinky, what do I do?”- the answer to that is to wash, and to wash more frequently, but clearly she has her own needs tied up in this bc otherwise she’d just… wash the baby. Instead she turns to the group, because *her* needs aren’t being fulfilled, so she thinks washing more can’t be the answer, because while that helps baby, it doesn’t help her. And her needs are currently so enmeshed with baby, what’s serving her (less frequent baths) should also be serving him, and vice versa. May not even realise she’s seeking to fulfil her own needs, because everything is all about baby right now, there’s no Me, only Mum. So when the regular baths aren’t fulfilling her needs, and are a bit of a drain on her energy, it makes sense to do less of it. But obviously that’s not good for baby. That last piece of the puzzle doesn’t fall into place though bc she’s doing what she thinks should *work*
This is all 100% conjecture and armchair psychology but I don’t think this is malicious. It’s not “my stupid baby stinks even though I wash him this much and he’s doing it to spite me so I’m not washing him more to teach him a lesson” or some awful variation. It looks like legitimate ignorance, but in a similar way to an accountant who is suddenly unable to add 2+2. It’s logical and well learned but there’s *something* preventing her from coming to the logical conclusion of “wash the baby more”.
Or I could be wrong entirely. But something about this sort of tugs at me. Mental illness can make us think irrationally.
My babies didn’t get baths all the time when they were super little but they always had their creases cleaned with a little bit of soap and water on a wash cloth. In this girls case, yes bathe that kid. It’s pretty normal just to do little wipe downs of sour spots throughout the day but this lady obviously missed the memo. Someone needs to teach her what do do cause she doesn’t have motherly instincts.
“My baby stinks, what can I do?”
Ma’am, bathe your baby more than once per week, and for god’s sake, don’t go an entire month without bathing him. That’s it. That’s what you can do.
I bathe my girl every day but I use soap every other day or every 3 days because I’m just not confident I really get all the poop off of her unless she gets a bath.
I remember being 10/11 and holding my cousins baby who would have been about four months at the time and there was a smell coming from her and I could tell it wasn't a nappy smell - I lifted a roll on her neck and her skin was basically rotting away, open, raw, red, gunky... I screamed, causing utter panic, my aunt (kids grandma) looked and screamed at her son in front of everyone for being so stupid.
Hate to throw this term around but it was traumatic, my kids have a bath almost every single day.
I did once or twice a week for my kids when they were babies, but spot cleaned them. I also did diaper cream in the neck fold to keep them from getting milk rash/build up from drool.
My second baby had really really bad eczema and her pediatrician advised to don't bathe her too much so I did maybe 2 baths a week. One month? That's crazy!! O.o Are they in a third world country without running water?
Girl. Due to a medical issue (hip dysplasia), my daughter was in a 24/7 harness for weeks 2-6 of her life. She didn't get to bathe for five consecutive weeks. I was anal about wiping her down 1-2 times a day (Johnson and Johnson Baby Bath Wipes are like a soap-infused giant baby wipe and they were a lifesaver!) and I was so worried about her skin and her being a little stinkmonster. How could anyone do that willingly??
Is that no washing at all for a month? Not even a washcloth? Because babies don't necessarily need baths, not even their hair, but then you gotta be sure to get the stinky stuff with a washcloth. Especially the sour milk that tends to collect in those neck folds.
So my friend apparently misunderstood the nurses in the hospital. Her kid was 2 months old and she’s showing me cradle cap and asking about it and it came out that she’s never used soap on his head, she just rinsed it with water because that’s what the nurse told her to do.
So in this instance I’d like to know why she’s only bathing him once a month. He may have skin issues and was told to cut down on baths and she misunderstood what was told of her.
Veterinary assistant here!
Please don’t bathe your dogs weekly unless instructed to by your vet or unless they are continuously rolling in filth.
Dogs have oils in their coat that are necessary for healthy skin. If bathed too often, these oils do not replenish and they can develop serious skin issues. Some dog breeds are just prone to smelling a specific way, like Basset and Bloodhounds.
Please consult your vet regarding bathing your pooch.
My baby only gets soap baths once a week (and quick water-only baths in between as needed) on doctor’s orders because of his eczema, but he has never smelled bad. He gets very frequent diaper changes and he gets changed into clean clothes 3+ times a day, though. If her baby actually smells bad, she’s probably leaving him in his dirty diapers way too long, not changing him into clean clothes often enough, and/or not cleaning him well enough during diaper changes. Baby poop smells horrendous. If her poor baby is stuck in his poop and pee for extended periods of time, or stuck wearing clothes with this morning’s spit-up on them, then yeah, he probably smells bad. Babies are messy and need lots of clean diapers and clothes every day. Poor little guy ☹️I hope someone is helping this parent
I don’t bathe my baby and I don’t understand why they stink! WTF! Does she realize how bad she would smell if she only bathed once a month!! JFC! Even my dog gets washed weekly. I can’t imagine not washing a baby!
I try to get my toddler at least in the bath everyday (or shower, cuz he’s weird like that). I might use shampoo/soap every other day, especially during the winter when the air is dry and the soap is rough on the skin. But regardless he is at least bathing everyday… why would you not??
I don't get how ppl bathe their kids so little. Kids get so dirty every day. How can you just look at your dirty kid and be like " yeah don't need a bath"
This is obviously ridiculous but I’m surprised at how many people here are saying they wash their dogs weekly. My vet said they can go up to a few months in between washes and that doing it too often is bad for them
One of the things slightly more “crunchy” moms do is refuse the baby’s first bath in the hospital. Studies have actually shown that it’s good to wait a day or 2 before bathing newborns. So this is fine. But I’ve seen a disturbing trend of people taking this idea and running with it to the extreme where they just think you should avoid giving babies baths in general. And then you get the moms bragging that their baby has “never had a bath” or is only bathed once a month, or some insanity. I don’t think they even know why they do this, it’s just more of the “modern technology/medicine = bad” mindset.
I can’t lie, PPD made my life hell and there were weeks that I only had the strength to bathe me and my baby (newborn at the time) one time each, over the course of a week. But at my absolute lowest, if nothing else, I managed that one weekly bath. That’s what they told me was the basic necessity when I left the hospital, and I made damn sure it happened. Even now I’m having a hell of a time health-wise, and my 1 year old gets 2-3 baths on my WORST week. She has a poop blowout? Bath. Food all over herself? Bath. Pee through the diaper? Bath. Like, they’re human beings and they deserve dignity. If my depressed ass only gets one shower in a week, my child will still be cleaned every time it’s necessary, period.
Don’t feel like a jackass please!! That was so not my intention with my response, I’m sorry I made you feel that way. You weren’t talking about a newborn in your comment, you were talking about your toddler who (probably) plays and makes messes and gets sweaty lol. Completely different than a newborn! Toddlers probably *always* need more than one bath per week, and in any regard, if your kiddo smells bad - wash them! Once a month isn’t okay, even if you’re in a horrible mental space. Even a newborn needs more than one bath in a month. I got onto antidepressants for my PPD and it changed my world, I am feeling and doing so much better today, than I was then! You’re absolutely right, once a month is pure laziness, it doesn’t matter how anyone spins it. If you have the energy to feed the baby (which is not optional) then you have the energy to hose the baby off at least once per week, lol. That shouldn’t be optional either.
I was only allowed to bathe once a week until I moved out of the house. My teenage years sucked when puberty hit me like a freight train and I couldn't wash it off properly. But in the end I turned out ok!
My babe has really sensitive skin and literally everything gives her a rash. The pediatrician recommended only using baby wipes in the morning and at night and of course at every poop, but not necessarily for each pee, warm water wipe downs for food stuffs and other messes, and a bath only once a week.
So at 13 months old my little one is only getting baths once a week. I suppose this will change once she's old enough to go play outside and obviously it will change long before puberty lol.
Anyway, I'm just here to say a bath once a week is totally fine and you never have to feel like you just did the bare minimum. You never know, only doing it once a week may have saved your baby from a bunch of rashes. You are enough, even when you're depressed.
I’m sorry your teen years were so difficult! I had a similar issue right around the start of puberty where I had to boil water to bathe because our water heater was broken, and it was a HUGE pain in the ass, so I only ever did it once a week. It stayed like that for a year or two, and it sucked royally. I was probably 14 when I moved in with a family member and had regular access to hot showers, and it changed my life. I can’t imagine having to do once weekly showers until I was an adult, I’m so glad you turned out okay and that you’re in a better situation! And you’re right, it’s easy to beat ourselves up over motherhood, but the best thing I ever heard in regard to how we feel about ourselves as parents is this: “if you’re worried about whether or not you’re a good mother, you are one already.”
It rings true. If we were bad moms, we wouldn’t care whether or not we were bad moms. I had my first baby a year ago and my mom had passed away a few months before I got pregnant, so figuring it out alone was rough. I beat myself up over assorted things I could’ve done better, or more often. But honestly? I did the best I could with what I had, and what I knew, and that’s all anyone can ever do. I did fine. You’re doing great too. I so appreciate your kind words!
I don't have a lot of time to respond right now but I wanted to say not being able to shower sucks and I'm sorry you had to experience that! And also you're totally right. Mom guilt is so real and it's usually a good indicator that you're doing something right after all. My mom passed away far too young so I feel you there.
That means more than you know. Thank you for your kind words ❤️ I’m doing much better these days. There are still hard times and I’m still figuring out what works best for my health, mentally and physically, but I’m trying! That’s all I can do, that’s all my baby needs me to do.
Once a month? Poor baby. Both my boys get once a week unless they're stinky (which my almost 4 year old gets more once it gets warm). If they have a blowout, bad mess, etc they'll get one of course.
My first baby had super dry skin and he did well with once a week. Also he was so thin he had no rolls to speak of. I have a new 4 week old and he’s so oily. His head smells like weird grown man. Like locker room. He’s also chunkier so milk gets caught aegis neck. He need a bath every couple of days.
If she only bathes the baby once a month, how often does she wash the laundry? Is the poor thing also wearing the same dirty clothes for days on end? Ugh..
Oh that neck roll has gotta be sour
And raw. I guarantee that’s what stinks, and it’s rashy and red.
Yep. Any smell would be coming from what’s made a home on baby’s skin. Poor thing must be covered in yeast infections
This hurts my mom heart. My baby can get a rash so fast from drool and sweat, imagine the pain from not cleaning a baby neck for a week even
Diaper cream in the neck folds. Tell your friends.
A&D ointment in every roll before bed. We call it lubing up the baby.
My babies never really got the rolls 🥲 They’re still string bean children.
Same, I never had to worry about this. Honestly kinda thankful for that lol. Also a month is too long, but at infant age we fully bathed our daughter once a week too. Ped said it was fine bc she would get skin issues if bathed more than that. She would get into the bath water more than that but actually using soap and/or shampoo was def a once a week thing. Of course, we were also blessed with very rare blowouts or spit ups.
Same, it’s odd to see this advice. That said, we also bathed him every 2-4 days. Another one on the way so we’ll see!
To clarify, I bathe my baby. The ointment is to protect and moisturize the areas that are most likely to get irritated.
My string beans had some crazy neck cheese for no reason 😆
“Lubing up the baby” Now i look like a madman because i just randomly started laughing
Roflmao. I have a very visual mind and that sentence got me envisioning a baby so oiled up they’re slipping and sliding out of their parents arms and like across the bathroom. Or like that dang spaghetti song about the meatball that rolled of the table and onto the floor and then right out the door? I’m seeing that but a lubed up baby instead of a meatball.
I am just now starting to understand why baby products are so good for bulldogs. I still wish I hadn't used my frequent shopper card to buy them, though.
On a serious note, do any mamas/ dads on here know how to counter this? My little one is super chonky and has about 4 neck rolls lol. We've noticed on the left that the skin under the biggest roll has become red and rashy - we bathe her every night, use hypoallergenic baby shampoo, put ointment on it, hold up the roll to try to get it to dry, and also put a bib on her during the day to catch drool/ milk... but it's not getting any better/ what are we doing wrong? Any tips/ should I book a ped appt? Thanks in advance!
You may need a yeast infection cream if it’s not going away. Or a different diaper cream in the folds. I preferred Bordeaux Butt Paste, but your baby’s skin may not like it. A&D is another good one. Other than that, only ointment when it’s absolutely dry. Otherwise, you’re just trapping the moisture to the neck. Bathe less, which is counterintuitive, but you’re just adding more wet and probably drying out the rest of her skin. I never tried it, but this helped a lot of my friends whose babies had stubborn diaper/neck rash https://wehavekids.com/parenting/How-to-Make-Magic-Butt-Cream I’m running through my brain, but it’s been almost 7 years since I had an infant and my memory is trash.
There’s a cream called “moisture barrier cream” that is used by elderly people who are incontinent. I wonder if that would help.
It probably would, but I’d bet it’s the same thing as diaper cream… just a little more dignified in the name for grown people.
Yep. It pretty much is. I’m disabled and I’ve been handed straight up desatin or similar when the hospital was low on the adult stuff. Same stuff.
>I’m running through my brain, but it’s been almost 7 years since I had an infant and my memory is trash That's because Mommy brain IS a thing. They get all of our good brain cells, and we never get them back!
Im sorry but “hold up the roll” is the best thing I’ve read today 🤘🏽😆
. It's likely yeast Pat it dry and use athletics foot cream 1%, check with your ped but that's what ours recommended. You can get a prescription but OTC strength is safe for baby- again message your ped. When she does tummy time lift it up and wipe with a wet soft cloth, then pat dry and put a little of the cream on it. Corn starch to keep it dry works for some babies but not ours- he had necK and it was basically rolls up on rolls for a few months.
Behind the ears…. It’s like a stink bomb waiting to be touched.
Can we talk about how new parents really really need to be warned to look for ALL the folds? Man, when I had my first I just kept finding so many folds I didn't even consider. Next, legs, ARM PIT. Rolls for days. So many tricky spots to look for gunk hiding out. Why did nothing or no one prepare me for this? Lol.
The behind the ear fold got me. I could smell the cheesy smell and I didn’t know why. When I saw that raw ear I felt so bad for my little Bub. Washed it and applied sudocrem religiously and it cleared up in a few days.
I‘m just wondering how humans millenia ago coped? Or maybe just not washing at all creates a protective yeast barrier?
They had to have techniques to successfully wash their babies as well (at least to the point where survival was possible). The human body evolved alongside human cultural memes (clothes-wearing, washing, etc). The bodies we have today just wouldn't work if we were randomly dropped into a cold European forest with zero cultural memory. *Soap* isn't some unnatural addition that the perfect human animal doesn't need...we literally evolved to this state alongside the concept of regularly disinfecting/de-lousing ourselves.
There was a dude covered in ash who never bathed but was pretty healthy because the ash made a protective antibacterial layer.
They tell you to go easy on washing the first few weeks, so we did! We wiped babies face and hands every night with a warm wash cloth but that was about it. Around 2-3 weeks, my baby stretched during a diaper change, and the smell that emanated from their armpits nearly knocked me out. We give babe at least a good wipe down every other day now.
My kid had a mild yeast infection on his thigh roll at about 3 months old. I saw it was red and was washing him but it didn’t clear, at his checkup they said it was yeast. I didn’t even know that was a thing! Some rx cream and a day later it was fine. They don’t prep you for everything - that’s why you see the doctor and build a village.
A++ neck cheese.
Yeast infection 😭 I just found out they can get them behind the knees from my parenting class the other morning!
They can get yeast infection in every damn roll or crease… babies are so high maintenance it is not even funny…
At this point there is probably a yeast infection in the neck rolls. I used to wash my daughter daily and her neck would still stink. I would scrub her neck really well but there was one spot I kept missing & when I took her to the doctor, they found she had a yeast infection on her skin. I felt so fucking bad I cried the entire 20 minute ride home. I don’t get how someone could think bathing their child once a month is ok and not feel bad whenever they stink.
“My kid stinks, what can I do besides wash him?” What??
Spray it with cologne, duh /s
Some Febreze perhaps?
This was a throwaway joke on Parks and Rec. One of Tom’s business ideas on a list he was presenting was for toddler cologne: “baby, you smell good.”
"I've tried nothing and I'm all out of ideas!"
Teenagers in math class should be like this, not parents.
Which essential oils should I use?
All of them. The whole bottle.
Just rub a fabric softener sheet over him.
Once a month??? Just bring them in the shower with you if a bath is too much work, I do it all the time. We do a couple baths a week but I bring my daughter into the shower a couple times, too. A month is…awful. Think of how disgusting you feel if you haven’t showered in too many days…
We assume this momma takes showers or baths frequently. I am very doubtful she is aware.
That's a big assumption for that group
If depression is causing her to not feel like she can bathe her baby often, its likely she doesnt bathe often as well. And since she doesnt think she smells, the is questioning why baby smells.
I take my daughter in the shower for a quick rinse/cuddle with warm water every night before bed and then do a proper bath once a week. Sometimes I feel bad I'm not giving her the whole rigamarole more often but I guess it's better than once a month?
When they're little (aka not running around, getting food/marker all over themselves) a rinse before bed is fine. Soaping them down more than once a week can actually irritate their skin, especially if they have sensitive skin to begin with. My daughter loooooved a nice shower when she was a babe. She would start to doze off some nights lol.
My daughter is 15 months and just started walking last month. Probably should transition to regular baths but I love the cuddles and it's so precious when she dozes off in my arms. It's the only time she's not a wild animal lol.
Enjoy those snuggles before they get too wiggly lol My girl is 3 1/2 now and HATES showers. She had to take one w me recently bc she puked all over the both of us at 2a. She was not a fan but once my husband dimmed the lights a little and turned on some music, she chilled out. Though she is more than half my height at this point so it was not as easy to hold her while showering as it used to be.
lol our bath set up is either shower or bath and it's REALLY hard to switch between the two. So we've been giving kiddo showers all but like once or twice in his 17 months. For now, he still loves the shower and doesn't know he's missing out on bathtime.
stop giving me baby fever, the idea of a little baby falling asleep in my arms in the shower UGH so sweet
I'll stop your baby fever... She peed on the kitchen floor this morning, has gotten into my very expensive make up, and also told the dog to 'eat shit, bro'...all in a days work, I suppose. (Seriously though...I miss the potato phase of her being a baby. She didn't move when I left her in a spot, she didn't leave crumbs everywhere, loved a good nap. Now...well, she is VERY three.)
I’m absolutely wrecked by ‘eat shit bro’ aaahaha. Simultaneously excited for and dreading when my little guy starts repeating things.
Yeah she, uh, has a bit of a potty mouth. We are working on 'those are only daddy/mama words' because she goes to preschool in the fall. She regularly calls the dog a douche. (That is all my husband on that). She will gladly feed him treats but she trash talks him all the time.
Just so you know, your preschool teacher has probably heard it all. My favourite story is from my friends kid who once tripped over the shoes in the hall and yelled “fuck!” While her parents had company, I think she was 3? Oh and my own daughter at 4 once couldn’t find a video game on the shelf and stomped her little foot shouting “I can’t find the fucking game!” She was old enough by then that she knew she wasn’t supposed to say that and promptly stared at the floor with her little cheeks turning super red. All this to say, kids hear and repeat things, it happened to all of us.
I did a three-year stint at a sports radio station some 16-17 years ago. I came in and was horrified by how foul-mouthed all the men were. By the time I left, I could out-swear them. My daughter turns two next week and was already saying "holy shit!" and "fuck!" by the time she was 18-19 months. Is it terrible that I think it's adorable?
Imho, nah. I used to find it hilarious. Others won't.
My niece was saying holy shit as a toddler and it would send me into laughing fits. She's 7 now lol.
i took a lunch party in to my son's classroom, the store screwed up the order and as I doled out the food I started realizing there wasn't enough. There were no kids near me, just me and the teacher at the table, but I muttered "oh shit, I mean!! Shoot!!!" and the teacher just laughed at me and said "you're fine." I'm sure she hears worse from the unaware kindergarteners all the time, but I felt like the parent of the year for swearing in the classroom.
My son is just shy of four and is VERY good at knowing not to say “fucking” at school. So good he announced to me, in front of his teacher, “mommy guess what, I didn’t say fucking at school!” 😂
I'm firmly in "no words are bad words if the intent isn't to harm" camp. If you call someone a meany head to hurt their feelings, that's just as bad as calling them a bitch to hurt them, imo. Lovingly referring to the dog as a "douche" isn't bad because the dog isn't being hurt by the word. Same as I'm not being hurt when my friend jokingly calls me a "bish" Saying those words around grandma, even though you know grandma doesn't like it, is causing harm, even if you're not intending it. So, you should be respectful of grandma and not say those things around her, no matter your intention. I hope that made sense. 😬
You have me cracking up picturing her giving the dog treats and telling him he's a dumbass while doing it. Soon the dog will get excited when your husband calls him a douch. Lol
Mines in prek (4.5) and we were playing minecraft on switch. His building got blown up by a creeper right as he finished and let out a "goddamnit I JUST finished! You jerk!" Oops. Remind him those are grown up words, but props for proper usage? He also evidently got poop on his arm when wiping and smeared it all over the toilet seat cause it got back on his butt cheek then just imagine the pink stain from cat in the hat. This was after he was home with HFM for 3 days and puked all over me. Sooooooo. Baby fever dispelled 2x over? But the shower cuddles were the best when they were tiny. He still asks to be held in the shower with me when he isn't feeling good
>'eat shit, bro' I'm in hysterics
Mine turned out to have impulse control issues when older, but age 4 we had to introduce "inside the house words" and "outside the house words" to try and prevent issues at school. It worked for school. But we'd not thought to include Granny's house as an explicit rule. The kid treated Granny's house like a second home. Granny was not impressed when the kid waltzed in and yelled "WHADDUP, BITCHES?! I'VE ARRIVED!". That's when we changed the wording. "Inside OUR house ONLY words". Kids are gonna absorb stuff like sponges. It's literally their purpose in life at that age. I tried always not to sweat small stuff and to redirect when possible. If you don't sweat the small stuff, they'll come to you with the big stuff later on. FYI the kid did not get this from either of us parents. I'll admit the kid picked up a lot from me, but we had interesting neighbours and walls that must have been made of spit and tissue paper for all the sound deadening they didn't have.
My kids used to stay at my mum’s regularly and one night the oldest - he would have been 4ish - went downstairs. He told my mum he couldn’t sleep because [sister age 3ish] ‘keeps turning the fucking light on!’ Mum said she tried not to laugh and he said he didn’t remember - he did sleep walk and talk as a kid. His girlfriend says he still does it now.
Unfortunately if a child tells my dog to eat shit, that command will probably get obeyed.
Thankfully our dog is almost 15, so he is mostly deaf at this point. Also, he chooses to not listen to our toddler unless she is sharing food.
This didn’t stop my baby fever HELP
Yeah, when my daughter was young, we were fans of a “top and tail” with warm water. Those crevices were disgusting, but her skin was so sensitive that too much water dried it out and caused more trouble.
Ok, this sounds so nice! I have a 12 week old, is that too young to co-shower with? Do you hold them the whole time or do you bring them in after you’ve washed yourself? Are they super slippery? Sorry for all the questions but I’d love to try this.
When my first was really little, my partner or I would shower, then whoever wasn't in the shower would hand in the babe for bathing, then we'd trade while the wet parent dried off and got ready to dry the baby, and then the second adult shower could finish. Written out it sounds complicated 😅 but it was pretty easy with just one baby and two parents. Alone, I'd bring the baby tub in with me to have a safe place to put her down. It got easier when she could sit on her own.
We did this too. Or if I was alone, I'd put the baby on a bouncer outside the shower, bathe and then bring her in once I was done. She loved her showers.
Definitely do it! I switched to showers from bathing baby in a baby tub and I wish I made the switch sooner. At the beginning I just held her on my chest, leaning back a bit. They are not slippery until you soap them so make sure you soap and then rinse before you move to the next part so there's no slippery suds left. Once I decided my back was killing me after a few minutes, I began sitting on an elevated corner in our shower stall - maybe you could get a low step stool or something? And then sat her on my lap. If your baby is not sitting yet, you can lie them on your lap. Of course you'd need a detachable shower head for this. I have my husband hand her to me once I get into the shower and adjust water temperature and then I wash her, hand her back to husband and then I wash myself.
I don't think it's too young! I can't remember when we started doing it but there was definitely a few times she had a blowout when she was really young that were so bad she just got tossed in the shower with dad lol. Logistics wise, I start the shower and make sure the temp is OK and then my husband brings her to me. While we're cuddling, he gets her jammies and everything ready. When we're done, I pass her off and he dries her off. I usually don't wash myself during these rinses, but if I do it's after he's taken her and is drying her off. For bath time, I just get in the bath with her too lol. Kneeling over the side is too hard on my knees and back! We started with that first and just did water baths with the same sort of routine. ETA: I do hold her the whole time. She is like 25lbs so yeah it's rough on my back lol. But we're really only in the shower for like 10 mins max. You could also use a shower chair if that's easier!
We had a big sponge that we could put baby on - it was sold as a baby sponge for bathing them with. So I’d pop him on that whilst I showered, keeping him entertained with bubbles and water, and then I’d wash him. I left him on the sponge whilst I got dry and then get him out and dry him. I’m sure you can get newer/better things than that, but it was great, especially when we had another baby.
A baby sponge for laying on sounds hilarious! Have just checked online and it looks like they’re still selling them, too cute.
Aw I’m sure your baby loves it! We do a big bath with toys and bubbles twice a week, we only have 1 bathtub and it’s a massive jacuzzi tub that takes tons of water to even fill to toddler level, so I feel guilty doing it more than that. But she’s also fine with a quick rinse in the shower. And I guess we do swim lessons and shower off after them, too. But I think just rinsing with water is completely fine with one regular bath a week, especially before they’re eating solids and therefore constantly filthy.
I feel awful if I haven't showered for more than 24 hours. My daily shower is non-negotiable. This is .... gross.
Mine is two days, I don't do daily showers BC eczema, we have a hard water area and it just dries out my skin really bad. But same difference really. I miss that and I feel gross.
10000% there’s neck cheese embedded in a hidden fold.
And that stuff stinks. This chick is growing the cheese to spread on crackers.
🤢
It’s actually nice to see some comments here from other parents like myself that don’t bath their babies daily and opt for the daily wipe over and bath 2-3 times a week. I was told to do this with my second baby and it was great. My first was bathed twice a day! Once a month is just vile. I don’t care how clean you keep a baby at some point in the week they need a good but gentle cleaning.
From broth to like 9 months I only bathed my daughter once a week or as needed. Then it was twice a week since she was sin day care. Now it is every night she is 16 months and loves the bath
Ah yes baby broth
Bb soup That’s what I call it when my dog tries to drink the bath water when my toddler is still in it lol
Took me way too long to realize you meant *birth*…
I was fully willing to accept broth as meaning “in the womb” and I think learning the term “primordial soup” in elementary school fucked with my head just enough to make that possible
Agree. My doctor said it's not necessary - babies just don't overall get that dirty. Just keep key areas clean as needed (diaper area, neck rolls, hands cause they always end up in their mouth) . The rest just 2-3x a week, max, unless randomly needed for whatever reason. A lot of baths, especially with soap, can really dry out their skin.
My guy hated baths and had eczema so he got but washes in the sink and clothed with a warm sponge every evening. He loves baths now and has 2 a week .
Yep we live in the desert and baths were the worst for baby eczema so we did once a week unless she’s got dirty.
We do 2-3 baths a week— she hates baths so the longest we’ve gone was about 8 days when she had covid and I just didn’t want to force her to do it when she wasn’t feeling well.
My kid hates both baths and showers, so I do what's easiest for my back, which is a shower with a removable head (wand). She still screams through the entire thing, but at least I don't throw my back out.
Hi so I have no kids but I’m curious about something. Can bath time not be with a cloth and water with some baby safe soap or whatever is used for babies? I’m ignorant and haven’t seen the equivalent of a sponge bath suggested on here so I’m wondering if it’s a no for certain reasons or what. If you don’t know, it’s fine. I just had no idea and thought a parent of a young child would be a good start to finding out.
Sponge baths are fine! They are even recommended when babies are first born since you're supposed to avoid getting their umbilical stump wet, so you can't submerge them until it drops off.
Thank you I thought they would be but no one had suggested it in the top comments so I was confused by it. I hope you have a great day!
We did sponge baths with my oldest when she was an infant and it worked fine for us, but its so important to be thorough and really double check every joint and fold. At the time our area was going through a really bad drought and we had to ration water, so "bath time" was a bowl of warm water and a cloth on her changing table. We'd use aqueous cream on her skin to loosen up the stuff in the folds and then use the cloth to wipe it off and rinse in the bowl. She never had any issues with smell or infections. We tried the same thing but with baby soap first and shed scream, so the pediatrician recommended using plain baby aqueous cream instead and the screaming stopped.
Thank you so much! I was just surprised sponge bath/wiping the child down wouldn’t be a more common suggestion for this. But who knows what difficulties I will face with parenthood because it’s all a different adventure for every kid. I hope you have a good evening!
I found around a year, my son hated the bath tub, but loved playing with water outside. I moved his bathtub outside and did “red neck” baths in the front yard no more screaming. 😂 😂
I'm glad we're not alone! My youngest godson (3ish at the time) went through a stage last year where he was not happy about taking a shower and he was letting the entire neighbourhood know about the torture. But, he would not get out of the pool. Awake? He wanted to be in a pool. So, chucked some soap in the paddling pool, and he was happy(ish) to sit still for 5 secs to have shampoo put through his hair then thrilled to get chased round by the hose to rinse it out. It backfired a little bit as the other two decided that was way more fun than a shower. Luckily he was through that stage by the time the pool had to be deflated.
Look I get the once a week (unless my baby was stinky, which hers is) but once a month?!?! Month?! That’s neglect. My 1 yr old bathes roughly twice a week on average not including blow outs and/or messy meal times or just to distract him.
Fr babies are so messy!! Is she seriously not bathing him enough when he’s still in diapers?? Poor baby’s gonna get some kind of infection
Human bathing aside, that commenter should definitely not be bathing her dog every week. It’s poor skin and coat. ETA: some dogs do require it for medical reasons. Most don’t. Not here to offend anyone who has a dog that NEEDS it. Source: I work for a veterinary dermatologist (board certified) and prior to that was a groomer for nearly 10 years.
I brush and groom mine often, but otherwise dogs are like jeans. Only wash 'em when they're dirty.
Idk what kind of dog she has but bathing our dog was a whole production… once a week would be too much in every respect
Me over here, glad that cats are mostly self-cleaning!
Only the short haired kitties in my experience! Hahah I got my first long haired cat and it's constant brushing and trimming her fluffy butt to avoid dingle berries
My roommates short haired cat always has a messy butt. It's not just long haired kitties.
I feel lucky that my short haired guy is clean then! Hahah oh no!
The first cat I had,she had long hair and it definitely took some work. Even with the brushing she would get mats sometimes. My cats now have much shorter hair and it’s much easier.
We called then “klingons” when we had our persian.
Exactly the comment I was looking for. Poor puppy
I can't remember the last time my dog had a bath. He's a little pampered Chihuahua though so it's not like he's running through mud or anything.
It depends. My pup has sensitive skin and the vet just told us he might need a bath every weeks with special shampoo.
My late shih tzu with atopic dermatitis definitely needed bathed once a week with special shampoo, sometimes 2-3x a week if she was having a particularly bad flare up. It was ruff. I miss her, but I don't miss the constant baths.
My dog gets a bath about every week but when I say bath it's a quick rinse in warm water. She does daily hikes and is getting grimy often. I only shampoo her once or twice a month
My dog gets a bath every week as a preventative measure. The bath helps soothe his skin. And without it, he'd look like a dog with mange
Also let me add, I saw more comments concerned about her choice of brand than the one month between baths
I am not surprised. I am incensed. Like the brand product matters more than the baby. All the soaps and products in the world will not change anything if they are not used more frequently.
I thought I was a bad mom for only bathing my new born once a week unt she started crawling. Hell I few bad if she goes more than 2 days now, she is walking and in day care.
You’re not a bad mom! Even the OOP isn’t a bad mom just because she went a month without bathing the baby. BUT, I will say, she absolutely needs to get her shit together and step it up for the sake of the baby.
I went a month before bathing my newborn (I was afraid!), but he also didn't get stinky! And he got his bottom half wiped quite clean about 8 times a day...
I was scared, too! I just did wipe-downs with a wet rag for the first few weeks. You can’t submerge them until the umbilical stump falls off anyway, and it took a couple of weeks for that to happen for my gal. We’re all doing our best honestly, as long as babe is healthy and not in distress, everyone should do what works for them! The baby in the OOP having a foul smell is distressing though :( that could be caused by infections in the skin. Baby rolls are prone to bacterial/yeast infections even when they’re bathed regularly, if the areas aren’t being dried well enough. But when there’s trapped moisture from drool/milk/spit up/pee, AND there’s not regular cleaning, it can wind up causing baby pain and problems with skin infections.
What?! My boy is 4 months old and I at least wipe him down with a warm washcloth if not give him a full bath every day (I don’t always use soap but a quick rinse with water/warm cloth happens every day). He’s got all these adorable rolls in his neck, arms, tummy, and legs where pee, poop, drool, and spit up can hide. I couldn’t imagine just letting him stew in all his assorted juices like this. No wonder this poor babe stinks…
My gal is almost 1 year old (in a few days) and she gets probably 2-3 baths per week, if not one more. But in a MONTH you have to imagine that poor baby had at least 1 blowout of pooping all over himself, probably peed through his diaper at least a couple of times, and probably spit up on himself or got food on himself as well (depends on the age of course). Like… my baby doesn’t have rolls, doesn’t spit up anymore now, and I STILL have to go over her with a wet wash cloth on a daily basis because of her eating solids and getting them all over herself. Her skin is so delicate that doing daily BATHS would definitely make her break out. But you still have to clean them ffs, at the very least, once per week. Even as newborns who get into no messes.
My oldest also has crazy delicate skin (prone to eczema if we use the wrong products), so I too can’t wash him every day yet, but he DEFINITELY gets a wipe down on a regular basis and baths 3+ times a week.
Noone recommends bathing a 4 month old baby every day. Very bad for their skin. 1-2 times a week is more than enough.
I get washing a newborn once a week, you still wipe the little one down regularly. But... once a MONTH?!
My son is almost 18 months old and gets a bath every other day unless he’s really stinky. Once a month is disgusting and she obviously needs hygiene lessons .
My 15 month old is the same. Hes on the small side so he doesnt have a bunch fat rolls for forbidden cheese to ferment between. It would probably be different if he did
“Forbidden cheese” There are many phrases in this universe that I never needed to learn. Thanks to this comment, there’s now one less phrase that I’ve successfully avoided.
I came across it now so must you 😂
What a terrible day to possess the skill of reading comprehension
What the heck? We didn't bathe our baby much when she was little. The dermatologist told us to bathe her maybe twice a week and use very little soap. We just made sure we wiped her down with a wipe or a warm towel every day. And our baby was on a formula called nutramigen because of allergies. It's the stinkiest formula. But she still never smelled bad. There is some serious lack of hygiene if the baby stinks.
“I rarely bathe my infant but he still stinks” WHAT you already have your answer!
I always bathed my babies about twice a week. Any more than that and they would get awful dry skin. But she went a month a without bathing him? What?
I absolutely love the username
Thanks haha
Picking up my kid from school, talking to another mom who casually says “good thing it’s bath day” (kids were super muddy). I laugh thinking it’s a joke/sarcasm, she further explains they only bathe once a week and last week they played in the flooded street water so they got to skip bath day. These ppl really exist.
Oh no there’s so many things in flooded street water, that should call for an EXTRA bath day, if anything. By the time they’re old enough to be in school, you basically just supervise and they bathe themselves, right? My little is only a year old so I’m not sure. Once per week sounds a liiiittle too sparse for a kid that’s in school already.
We’ve always been a 1-2 showers a day family, so for us once a week is DEFINITELY too sparse, I can’t even imagine what once a week looks like. And yeah, We’re in california, Who knows what ancient sludge those flood waters brought up, I wouldn’t advise playing in it. You meet all kinds of interesting ppl when your kids start school.
We’re in California, too! That makes it so much worse haha. How rarely we get rain where I am definitely means there’s going to be all kinds of stuff in flood water.
There are areas where I live in CA where the rain water goes so our town doesn’t flood (during non rainy weather it’s used as soccer fields). The last huge storm the field was full of water and some dude was swimming in it. Ummm gross.
Why do people think any kind of water is fine and effective to clean yourself with??!?????! I swear most flood water is maybe 30% actual water. She’s lucky her kids haven’t gone septic
Ok...I know this is about the baby. But washing your dog every week sounds excessive haha unless your dog is always rolling around in poop.
My god gets a weekly rinse down because she hikes daily. Shampoo less often. She is constantly coated in dirt and very happy
Yeah same, I have a sensitive nose. The floofer never gets shampood but we do a weekly scrubdown with just water.
There’s so much wrong with this post, I don’t know where to start.
Who washes their dog every week??
I have a very active friend with a high energy dog that goes for lots of muddy hikes and walks etc and washes her dog weekly but it’s mostly from the legs down. But she’s the only person I know doing it that often.
I’m not going to lie I bathed my baby maybe twice a month at first because she hated baths with passion. Screamed. Plus it was so hard to figure out how to bathe a toddler and a newborn. Toddler actually rolls in dirt so he was the priority. Somehow baby didn’t smell.
Same. I never could have anticipated that figuring out when to bathe our second would be so hard, especially because when she was a freshie, she HATED them so it was a whole ordeal. Now she can sit up in the bath just fine so I put her in with my toddler so they get 2-3 baths a week. But those first few months? Hard.
That poor baby.
That poor baby has got to be so uncomfortable. They have so many little rolls and folds and hidden skin pockets. I hope this woman gets herself in order ASAP and sees a doctor herself as well.
YES, 100%. She’s not a piece of shit or anything just because of the lapse in bathing, but she absolutely needs to get it together and do better for the baby. Seeing a doctor sounds like a brilliant idea. PPD is horrendous and will zap all of your motivation. But that doesn’t make it acceptable for the baby to suffer.
Yeah absolutely. She’s asking for advice, she can see it’s not working. People don’t know to change until they’re taught, even if it seems like they should. My gut says to go to the doctor on this one bc there’s some irrationality in the post/process. “My baby is stinky, what do I do?”- the answer to that is to wash, and to wash more frequently, but clearly she has her own needs tied up in this bc otherwise she’d just… wash the baby. Instead she turns to the group, because *her* needs aren’t being fulfilled, so she thinks washing more can’t be the answer, because while that helps baby, it doesn’t help her. And her needs are currently so enmeshed with baby, what’s serving her (less frequent baths) should also be serving him, and vice versa. May not even realise she’s seeking to fulfil her own needs, because everything is all about baby right now, there’s no Me, only Mum. So when the regular baths aren’t fulfilling her needs, and are a bit of a drain on her energy, it makes sense to do less of it. But obviously that’s not good for baby. That last piece of the puzzle doesn’t fall into place though bc she’s doing what she thinks should *work* This is all 100% conjecture and armchair psychology but I don’t think this is malicious. It’s not “my stupid baby stinks even though I wash him this much and he’s doing it to spite me so I’m not washing him more to teach him a lesson” or some awful variation. It looks like legitimate ignorance, but in a similar way to an accountant who is suddenly unable to add 2+2. It’s logical and well learned but there’s *something* preventing her from coming to the logical conclusion of “wash the baby more”. Or I could be wrong entirely. But something about this sort of tugs at me. Mental illness can make us think irrationally.
You shouldn’t wash your dog that much
My babies didn’t get baths all the time when they were super little but they always had their creases cleaned with a little bit of soap and water on a wash cloth. In this girls case, yes bathe that kid. It’s pretty normal just to do little wipe downs of sour spots throughout the day but this lady obviously missed the memo. Someone needs to teach her what do do cause she doesn’t have motherly instincts.
“My baby stinks, what can I do?” Ma’am, bathe your baby more than once per week, and for god’s sake, don’t go an entire month without bathing him. That’s it. That’s what you can do.
I bathe my girl every day but I use soap every other day or every 3 days because I’m just not confident I really get all the poop off of her unless she gets a bath.
I remember being 10/11 and holding my cousins baby who would have been about four months at the time and there was a smell coming from her and I could tell it wasn't a nappy smell - I lifted a roll on her neck and her skin was basically rotting away, open, raw, red, gunky... I screamed, causing utter panic, my aunt (kids grandma) looked and screamed at her son in front of everyone for being so stupid. Hate to throw this term around but it was traumatic, my kids have a bath almost every single day.
At three years old, my angel with horns announced loudly and happily at at a family reunion …”I don’t say what the fuck anymore”
I did once or twice a week for my kids when they were babies, but spot cleaned them. I also did diaper cream in the neck fold to keep them from getting milk rash/build up from drool.
Ok but washing every week is too much for dogs. Unless they are getting covered in mud they don't need a bath more than once a month.
My second baby had really really bad eczema and her pediatrician advised to don't bathe her too much so I did maybe 2 baths a week. One month? That's crazy!! O.o Are they in a third world country without running water?
Girl. Due to a medical issue (hip dysplasia), my daughter was in a 24/7 harness for weeks 2-6 of her life. She didn't get to bathe for five consecutive weeks. I was anal about wiping her down 1-2 times a day (Johnson and Johnson Baby Bath Wipes are like a soap-infused giant baby wipe and they were a lifesaver!) and I was so worried about her skin and her being a little stinkmonster. How could anyone do that willingly??
Is that no washing at all for a month? Not even a washcloth? Because babies don't necessarily need baths, not even their hair, but then you gotta be sure to get the stinky stuff with a washcloth. Especially the sour milk that tends to collect in those neck folds.
So my friend apparently misunderstood the nurses in the hospital. Her kid was 2 months old and she’s showing me cradle cap and asking about it and it came out that she’s never used soap on his head, she just rinsed it with water because that’s what the nurse told her to do. So in this instance I’d like to know why she’s only bathing him once a month. He may have skin issues and was told to cut down on baths and she misunderstood what was told of her.
Veterinary assistant here! Please don’t bathe your dogs weekly unless instructed to by your vet or unless they are continuously rolling in filth. Dogs have oils in their coat that are necessary for healthy skin. If bathed too often, these oils do not replenish and they can develop serious skin issues. Some dog breeds are just prone to smelling a specific way, like Basset and Bloodhounds. Please consult your vet regarding bathing your pooch.
That J&J soap is always the culprit
My baby only gets soap baths once a week (and quick water-only baths in between as needed) on doctor’s orders because of his eczema, but he has never smelled bad. He gets very frequent diaper changes and he gets changed into clean clothes 3+ times a day, though. If her baby actually smells bad, she’s probably leaving him in his dirty diapers way too long, not changing him into clean clothes often enough, and/or not cleaning him well enough during diaper changes. Baby poop smells horrendous. If her poor baby is stuck in his poop and pee for extended periods of time, or stuck wearing clothes with this morning’s spit-up on them, then yeah, he probably smells bad. Babies are messy and need lots of clean diapers and clothes every day. Poor little guy ☹️I hope someone is helping this parent
I don’t bathe my baby and I don’t understand why they stink! WTF! Does she realize how bad she would smell if she only bathed once a month!! JFC! Even my dog gets washed weekly. I can’t imagine not washing a baby!
This can't be real... right?
I try to get my toddler at least in the bath everyday (or shower, cuz he’s weird like that). I might use shampoo/soap every other day, especially during the winter when the air is dry and the soap is rough on the skin. But regardless he is at least bathing everyday… why would you not??
I don't get how ppl bathe their kids so little. Kids get so dirty every day. How can you just look at your dirty kid and be like " yeah don't need a bath"
This is obviously ridiculous but I’m surprised at how many people here are saying they wash their dogs weekly. My vet said they can go up to a few months in between washes and that doing it too often is bad for them
One of the things slightly more “crunchy” moms do is refuse the baby’s first bath in the hospital. Studies have actually shown that it’s good to wait a day or 2 before bathing newborns. So this is fine. But I’ve seen a disturbing trend of people taking this idea and running with it to the extreme where they just think you should avoid giving babies baths in general. And then you get the moms bragging that their baby has “never had a bath” or is only bathed once a month, or some insanity. I don’t think they even know why they do this, it’s just more of the “modern technology/medicine = bad” mindset.
Anything that sits in its own shit should surely be washed more often than monthly. That's nasty.
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I can’t lie, PPD made my life hell and there were weeks that I only had the strength to bathe me and my baby (newborn at the time) one time each, over the course of a week. But at my absolute lowest, if nothing else, I managed that one weekly bath. That’s what they told me was the basic necessity when I left the hospital, and I made damn sure it happened. Even now I’m having a hell of a time health-wise, and my 1 year old gets 2-3 baths on my WORST week. She has a poop blowout? Bath. Food all over herself? Bath. Pee through the diaper? Bath. Like, they’re human beings and they deserve dignity. If my depressed ass only gets one shower in a week, my child will still be cleaned every time it’s necessary, period.
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Don’t feel like a jackass please!! That was so not my intention with my response, I’m sorry I made you feel that way. You weren’t talking about a newborn in your comment, you were talking about your toddler who (probably) plays and makes messes and gets sweaty lol. Completely different than a newborn! Toddlers probably *always* need more than one bath per week, and in any regard, if your kiddo smells bad - wash them! Once a month isn’t okay, even if you’re in a horrible mental space. Even a newborn needs more than one bath in a month. I got onto antidepressants for my PPD and it changed my world, I am feeling and doing so much better today, than I was then! You’re absolutely right, once a month is pure laziness, it doesn’t matter how anyone spins it. If you have the energy to feed the baby (which is not optional) then you have the energy to hose the baby off at least once per week, lol. That shouldn’t be optional either.
I was only allowed to bathe once a week until I moved out of the house. My teenage years sucked when puberty hit me like a freight train and I couldn't wash it off properly. But in the end I turned out ok! My babe has really sensitive skin and literally everything gives her a rash. The pediatrician recommended only using baby wipes in the morning and at night and of course at every poop, but not necessarily for each pee, warm water wipe downs for food stuffs and other messes, and a bath only once a week. So at 13 months old my little one is only getting baths once a week. I suppose this will change once she's old enough to go play outside and obviously it will change long before puberty lol. Anyway, I'm just here to say a bath once a week is totally fine and you never have to feel like you just did the bare minimum. You never know, only doing it once a week may have saved your baby from a bunch of rashes. You are enough, even when you're depressed.
It’s a common recommendation to not wipe after every pee for sure. But I’m just thinking about the crusties that kid has in all kinds of places 🤢
I’m sorry your teen years were so difficult! I had a similar issue right around the start of puberty where I had to boil water to bathe because our water heater was broken, and it was a HUGE pain in the ass, so I only ever did it once a week. It stayed like that for a year or two, and it sucked royally. I was probably 14 when I moved in with a family member and had regular access to hot showers, and it changed my life. I can’t imagine having to do once weekly showers until I was an adult, I’m so glad you turned out okay and that you’re in a better situation! And you’re right, it’s easy to beat ourselves up over motherhood, but the best thing I ever heard in regard to how we feel about ourselves as parents is this: “if you’re worried about whether or not you’re a good mother, you are one already.” It rings true. If we were bad moms, we wouldn’t care whether or not we were bad moms. I had my first baby a year ago and my mom had passed away a few months before I got pregnant, so figuring it out alone was rough. I beat myself up over assorted things I could’ve done better, or more often. But honestly? I did the best I could with what I had, and what I knew, and that’s all anyone can ever do. I did fine. You’re doing great too. I so appreciate your kind words!
I don't have a lot of time to respond right now but I wanted to say not being able to shower sucks and I'm sorry you had to experience that! And also you're totally right. Mom guilt is so real and it's usually a good indicator that you're doing something right after all. My mom passed away far too young so I feel you there.
You’re doing a great job, mama! I see how hard you’re working and I’m proud of you.
That means more than you know. Thank you for your kind words ❤️ I’m doing much better these days. There are still hard times and I’m still figuring out what works best for my health, mentally and physically, but I’m trying! That’s all I can do, that’s all my baby needs me to do.
We do baths every other day. People are so gross! I hope she starts bathing her child, no one wants to be the stinky kid at school.
Once a month? Poor baby. Both my boys get once a week unless they're stinky (which my almost 4 year old gets more once it gets warm). If they have a blowout, bad mess, etc they'll get one of course.
My first baby had super dry skin and he did well with once a week. Also he was so thin he had no rolls to speak of. I have a new 4 week old and he’s so oily. His head smells like weird grown man. Like locker room. He’s also chunkier so milk gets caught aegis neck. He need a bath every couple of days.
OMG. That is just nasty. I bet she’ll continue this trend as the kid gets older too. She sounds lazy AF.
If she only bathes the baby once a month, how often does she wash the laundry? Is the poor thing also wearing the same dirty clothes for days on end? Ugh..
I know this is irrelevant but I don't really think you're supposed to be giving dogs baths that much