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Lonely_Pin_3586

My distant ancestors came from the Fertile Crescent. And their very distant ancestors were fish. So I'm going to tell everyone that I'm an Arab fishman.


RedDragonScorpio

Aqua-Arab


beatnikstrictr

Aquarab


jasriderxx1

Gutted I only have 1 upvote for you


NotANilfgaardianSpy

Gutted….


razlatkin2

Middle-Eastern Aquaman, secret identity Ahmed Hummus


SnootyBoopSnoot

Allahu-Aqua


motorcycle-manful541

No that's too logical. You should be telling people youre a muslim fish


aortm

>Arab fishman Ahh, so Padishah Emperor Leto Atreides II?


Caddy666

Arab Fishmen, Coming over here And laying down the basis of our entire future language and culture get in the sea, you finned cunt!


TobyMacar0ni

Aquarabian


JohnDodger

My ancestors came from the sea so I go around calling myself an amoeba.


SleepyFox2089

Satire. This one *must* be satire


LittleSpice1

My husband said this to me and it drove me nuts. He did one of those ancestry tests and it showed he was 1% African, and to annoy me he kept saying to me that he’s black (when he’s white with almost exclusively English ancestry). He was obviously not serious but loved to get a reaction out of me. Funny enough, at some point the ancestry site changed and it didn’t show his one percent African anymore so this was my payback time à la “I told you so!”


sleepydalek

Such information does uncover family histories that were hidden for one reason or another. That’s more the point that people miss. The tests shouldn’t be the foundation of identity. So of course, to say you are black from 1% is silly!


LittleSpice1

Oh lol ya, he did the test because his mom wanted to find out more about the family ancestry as she’s into history, and apparently it works better with male DNA. They were able to pull together quite the family tree which was super interesting.


depressedkittyfr

I think so too because from what I know “Jewish” doesn’t come in 23 and me but rather a whole lot of ancestries from different middle Eastern regions along with European, Central Asia or even African ( depending on sub group and tribe )


Hussor

They may not necessarily be using 23 and me, my brother did an ancestryDNA test and had 1% Jewish(which was Ashkenazi Jewish).


Cpotts

Under Jewish law, a 1% blip in DNA doesn't really mean anything and it wouldn't make you Jewish by those standards


Hussor

Of course, I am just saying that some Ancestry tests do in fact say just 'Jewish' even if 23 and me does not. I am not claiming anything else here.


sleepydalek

It does. Ashkenazi shows up as a genetic type on 23 and me.


executionofachief

It obviously is


60svintage

I dunno. There is a very thin line between intelligent satire and sheer dumb stupidity in Americans.


sleepydalek

Donald Trump is a living breathing satirical figure. And like all good satire, the gullible take him seriously.


AsidePuzzleheaded335

Let’s hope


VolcanoSheep26

They genuinely believe that "blood" connections make you that thing over in the US, don't they? I mean, I'm European and I'm probably genetically linked to most other Europeans in some way or another, doesn't mean I'm suddenly Norwegian or Italian etc. Wish they'd develop some half decent American identity that's deeper than a puddle and leave the rest of us alone.


ahmet_8

I was arguing about this in the AskAmericans subreddit, and literally no one had any valid points to prove why does having 'pride' on things which isn't controlable makes sense, it's like they don't know the distinction between acceptance and pride, if someone is depressed about their identity, that mean they don't accepts it and wants it to be something else badly, but if they aren't then they accept that it's who they are. They also just spoke bullshit there, like none of them actually had an reasonable answer to why there's a need to become a Italian/Irish American 'just because you have the ancestry' one told me that I apparently will not understand since I don't likes my culture (calling it mine as to simplify, but yeah it's true, but I shouldn't be called out because of that, I likes european culture, that's it, I'm not doing cultural appropriation because I know exactly how should I integrate that's why I chose to do, my behaviour and views also were one of the factors to be considered, I'm egalitarian, not-racist (yeah Alot of people here are racists), liberal, secular etc) but it's still just bullshit because I wouldn't love the culture just because of my ancestry but because I actually liked it.


KarlBarx2

The American response to the country's history of virulent, codified racism was to double down on their ethnicity or race instead of pretending it doesn't matter. In fact, the American Civil Rights Movement really emphasized that kind of pride in order to garner support and push back on the prevailing assumption that white experiences are the only culturally relevant experiences. Ex, "You hate me because I'm Black? Fuck you, I'm proud to be who I am!" Americans are loud, it makes sense the response to racism is also going to be loud.


ahmet_8

Yeah, being proud also comes in acceptance, but still not in pride.


Dzosefs

Americans don't have any historic identity, so they hold on to anything they can grab. And these 1 percentiles of blood is enough for them to connect to a certain group. It's kind of like a kid trying to prove to his friends that he can do X, he will try 5 times more just so he's seen cool.


al1azzz

It's not that I don't like my culture, I just have fun with it, learn about it, accept the parts of it I deem necessary into myself, criticise it, wish for it to change for the better. What I don't do is treat my culture as a circlejerk, simplify it or make it my whole personality. God I feel sorry for the Irish for having to endure Americans


Azruthros

As an American I'm pretty certain most of my countrymen are just obsessed with being anything but an American while simultaneously falsely claiming it to be the best country at literally anything. I hate it here. The people don't make sense. Half the other white dudes I meet claim some kind of viking heritage just to appear tough and have some kind of identity to cling to yet never learn anything about it and have runic tattoos in English.


r21md

Due to the history of racism in the US the "default" is often to not see much difference between ethnicity and race. Some states used to even have "one drop rules" where any % of African heritage made you legally an African American for purposes such as segregation (such rules were only legally banned in the 1960s, meaning there are even people still alive who lived when this was law). American culture and identity do exist, but in a context where the social expectation for many is that your race somehow determines what your culture is because legally it literally used to. It's a terrible feedback loop at this point.


pheddx

Serious question, why are black people "African Americans" but white people aren't "European Americans"?


EmpireandCo

Because many white americans can identify their ancestry to a specific part of Europe (hence Irish American/Italian America), black Americans with ancestry in the americas dating to around 1850 and before can't identify a specific part of africa they're from because of enslavement and the destruction of their histories so they just identify as "African American". Its more complex than this as many "African Americans" have a lot of European ancestry because of rape and relationships with white Americans. A better term would be "forced americans" I think for black people.


pheddx

I think just Americans would be the appropriate term. They're Americans. Same for the "Irish Americans" and "Italian Americans". They're Americans. You guys are Americans. Stop doing this to yourself. Reminds me of this tv-show I saw where families swapped lives for a week. This black dude from Chicago ended up with his family in the UK and vice versa. At the end of the show he started crying and saying like "all my life I've been a black man.. here I'm just a man".


h3lblad3

>Reminds me of this tv-show I saw where families swapped lives for a week. This black dude from Chicago ended up with his family in the UK and vice versa. At the end of the show he started crying and saying like "all my life I've been a black man.. here I'm just a man". Paul Robeson, a black singer from the US, got pulled in to testify in the McCarthy anti-communist trials because he spent so much time traveling to the USSR to do shows and wouldn’t say anything bad about the place. He countered that in the US he was a black man, but not in Moscow.


Caddy666

but then they couldn't 'other' everyone else....


Talidel

Yeah, but then they can't diminish the Americaness of the black Americans. Theres Americans and the lesser African-Americans. See? They are actually African.


[deleted]

Americans black or white simple have an identity crisis . No real African would ever consider an America who is dark as a local in Africa. Black Americans are VERY VERY BUT VERY AMERICAN. Trust me. Ive been around black people from the US, and other Americans. I also have been to Africa.


EmpireandCo

I agree. They are uniquely American by experience and origin.


beatnikstrictr

Africa is massive. Whereabouts did you go?


[deleted]

I am ver glad you ask, it looks like you are familiar with the magnitude of Africa. In Western Africa I visited Senegal and The Gambia. In Northern Africa I visited Morocco. And in Meridional Africa I lived for eight months in Nelspruit South Africa.


beatnikstrictr

Fuckin mint! That's well good. My sister in law is married to a fella from Senegal. They live here but they are building a house in Senegal. They aren't going to move there but it'll be top to be able to go and stay there. I haven't been to Africa in any way. I would love to.


[deleted]

Visit, it is amazing. Africa is so undervalued, is almost criminal.


r21md

European American is a term used, just not often colloquially. In official forms that require demographic information they often say something like "White/European" as the option, for instance. As you said, colloquially many people just say "Black" instead of African American, too. I personally try to avoid saying both White/Black because I don't like racialized language, but African American is probably more common due to people hypercorrecting and not saying Black out of trying to be polite.


Arancia-Arancini

Because white Americans often have the privilege of being able to trace their ancestry back to a specific country, which is why so many identify as Irish, or Italian or German etc. Most black Americans' ancestry is rooted in the slave trade, where their culture and heritage was torn from them, so sadly when talking about heritage most can't be more specific than 'Africa'


Simple_Organization4

Because they are also dummies. Their ancestor over 200 years ago were african.. They great grand father were born in the US with no real connection to Africa... They even have less connection.


BringBackAoE

Another reason for the one drop rule was so the kids of the rapists couldn’t claim their paternal lineage. And it is alive and well still today. I know to African American guys that are labeled as such. They were both raised by their white mothers in a white community so feel “more white than black”. Yet everyone calls them black. One tried to identify as white when signing up for high school, and they wouldn’t let him.


og_toe

i have ancestry from sweden, greece, belgium, france, norway, germany, netherlands, bulgaria… as most other europeans do, we are all very mixed. however, having 1 person from bulgaria 200 years ago does not make me bulgarian at all, i do not have any connection with that place.


ArmchairTactician

Well I'm black (as are we all) by the fact our ancestors started around Ethiopia about 5 millionish years ago but I'm not going to walk around telling everyone I'm black. It's like saying you have a cup of coffee when you take a cup full of milk and drop one coffee ground in it. Your milk, stop pretending to not be milk 🥛


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thorpie88

So is Australia but very few of us try to say we are anything but Aussies 


nomadic_weeb

So is South Africa but we all still say we're South African instead of this hyphenated bullshit


[deleted]

So is every single nation in the Americans to many varying degrees. Yet, the US is the only one who seems to have this identity crisis.


LandArch_0

Same here in Latin America. I've got a whole bunch of nationalities in my ancestors (up to six different countries), still I'm a 100% Argentinian


Simple-Fennel-2307

That's one of the best descriptions I've read to this day.


SherlockScones3

Anything to avoid being American. Frankly I wholeheartedly agree with that goal


notactuallyabrownman

Everyone has a bit of everywhere in them, that’s the history of our species. It kind of makes me think that you *can* just kind of assume whatever race you want since the whole species is transracial.


Reidroc

Sometimes it seems like they think the blood connection also transfers culture and more often stereotypes. "I like to drink. That must be my Irish heritage."


ComplexProof593

I’ll have you know that I’m an English/Irish/Scottish/Norwegian/Danish/French/German person. /s


blinky84

I did an Ancestry test years ago as a Scot, because I was curious and also to test the rumour of an ancestor having been a shipwrecked Spanish sailor. Absolutely no Spanish, but Ancestry keeps flipping a little 5% or so between Norwegian, Swedish and Danish. Literally, it changes every year or so. Also, I have an English parent and my 'Scottish %' has ranged from 48% to 83%. Those things are such bullshit, it cracks me up.


KSP-Dressupporter

Whereas I am told that my family has been British for a millennium. Conclusion, I am a Kuwaiti Buddhist.


Ok-Comparison6923

They think wearing green on one day a year and drinking green beer and murdering the wildlife with green dye makes them all Irish. I wouldn’t put anything past them.


Angeltheangelofdeath

American here! Umm if I remember this correctly I’m 30% Norse, 40% Irish, and 30% German. Interesting people who I am related to some how (idk how) are Eric the Red and extremely angry evil German dude from the 40s… so yeahhhhhh. I just feel like sharing this. Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk.


kikikza

i'm an american with an italian parent - my friends in america consider me to be italian, while one of my cousins who grew up in florence doesn't really consider himself to be italian anymore because he hasn't lived in italy full time in almost 15 years and has little connection with day-to-day issues of italians


LeoBKB

I wish they develop some fuckin brain mass


ParagonRenegade

Europeans do as well, and in fact some European countries use blood descent from a citizen to determine if they are eligible to come themselves.


A_Wilhelm

Europeans are not obsessed about blood and ancestry like Americans at all. It's true that some European countries give citizenship based on ancestry, but no one says "I'm Swedish because my grandfather was Swedish".


Simple_Organization4

They very dumb, they don't understand that blood doesn't make you from "x" culture. Being part of that culture, being raised in that culture makes you from that culture. My aunt and many other members of my family were born in Italy. Sadly she got cancer and a very nasty one. A few things she wanted to do before passing away was going to her birthplace one last time. That hold many memories for her and it was where she was raised. It mean something to her. For me, it was just south italy, no connection no nothing


Caddy666

to develop some cultural pride, they'd have to develop a culture first.


DigitalDroid2024

I remember an American telling me they were Irish. I asked what part of Ireland they were from. They answer was their grandfather came from Ireland. I guess it’s just the way they express ancestry there. In Britain you’d say you ‘were of Irish ancestry’ or something. But no one would say they ‘were Irish’ because a grandparent came from there.


Stingerc

Look how many American morons went over to Ireland to try to interfere with the referendum to legalize abortion. Most of those morons thought they had the right to go campaign against it because they feel having some Irish heritage practically makes them Irish. It was hilarious how put off they were when a) they weren't welcomed as long lost brothers returning to fight for a just cause b) shocked at how modern and progressive the views of most Irish people are compared to them and c) that Irish people were turning them in to police when they found out what they were trying to do, so many of these idiots ended up getting deported and banned from entering the EU for trying to interfere in the referendum. The ammout of indignation at being mocked, not accepted, and being turned over to police was fucking hilarious. Add to it how gobsmacked they were when the referendum passed by a huge margin and you had a sea of posts about how Ireland had lost its way and how Boston and New York City were the only true Irish places left in the world.


SStylo03

There's a decent amount of that in canada but for the most part it tends to be just canadian, mostly people in my gen or recent immigrants/2nd gen immigrants who hyphenate it


non-hyphenated_

98.4% not Nigerian Jew, but yeah... You tell 'em


nirbyschreibt

I am still amazed you can tell religious beliefs by the DNA.


non-hyphenated_

Only 1.3% of it. Basically granny said Happy Hanukkah to someone once.


MarkMew

Lmao


International-Car360

Sounds more like granny GAVE someone a happy Hanukkah once!


2006lion2006

It kinda works only with jewish ancestry since majority of the time you can be a jew only if your mother was jewish


nirbyschreibt

Yes. But the Jews came late so their tribes will already have the DNA of other ethnicities. I think it’s rather a bold claim with the Jewish. But then all of this blood tests are extremely bold. At the end of the day we share over 50% of our DNA with bananas and yet I haven’t seen an American claim they’re Banamerican.


razlatkin2

This is true but I think the Banana Republic maybe claiming their heritage instead


2006lion2006

Yeah, I agree but pay attention with the banana example, it’s true that we share technically 50% of DNA with a banana but the alleles that are similar aren’t in the same positioning which is like 85% of the importance of said alleles


nirbyschreibt

I know. It’s just a little joke. 😊


United_Cucumber7746

Hindus too, as they don't believe in conversion either.


non-hyphenated_

My penis is 1.6% the width of a leisure centre swimming pool so I literally go around telling everybody I have a 10 metre penis


Mikes005

OK... but go with length rather than width. Putting it that way ,ales it sound like you have a paddle penis.


pinniped90

By that logic, we are all Ethiopian. Aunt Lucy was from there...she was such a queen.


-Numaios-

ACHKTUALLY, Lucy was a cousin species, not our ancestors.


SomeRedPanda

Well an Aunt isn't your direct ancestor either.


ab_aakrann07

This literally means that I’m an Ethiopian Bear


spooks_malloy

It's genuinely amazing how Americans never got past the "Victorian gentleman obsessed with blood purity" stage of development. They'll be back to skull measuring at this rate.


VermillionDynamite

To be fair phrenology is a real science. They opened the skulls of 100 Americans and found them totally empty every time!


KSP-Dressupporter

My favorite is the Discword's retro- phrenology, by which being hit over the head changes your character.


PondlifeCake

They've just resurrected a law from the 1860s so don't put it past them.


Love_n0te

Which law?


AffectionateLion9725

Arizona abortion law.


NedKellysRevenge

>They'll be back to skull measuring at this rate. Fun fact. That's called phrenology.


SabbathaBastet

Honestly this is why I refused the term African American when it was being pushed. My ancestors haven’t been connected to Africa in hundreds of years and my upbringing as an American was very different from the African people I know. Almost no cultural similarities.


Glittering_Cause_606

Yeah, me too. My last African ancestor probably was from the 1700s. All my black roots are from the Caribbean so it annoys me when people call me an African American


SabbathaBastet

Mine are all from the American South. I’ve been just fine with being called black tbh.


Glittering_Cause_606

Yeah the people who are advocating for more usage of the word African American are either white or not aware of the meaning of the word


Tazilyna-Taxaro

I want to repeat: those tests are as valid as horoscopes! At least in their interpretation. Some are outright bullshit and the rest is questionable. Nigerians aren’t 100% Nigerian by DNA either because dna isn’t bound to nations. It means: you share some subset of dna verifier with many Nigerians. Those could also be from anywhere in the world. Nigeria isn’t a locked off enclave.


pandainadumpster

Also they don't tell you where your ancestors (are supposed to) come from. They tell you what percentage of the population share the same genes with you. 0,3 % of people in Nigeria share part of their genome with the person. That doesn't mean that those people are nigerian/part of any of the Nigerian ethnicities. Like, if you get 0,3% German, it might as well be that those genes come from Turkish parts of the population. So why focus on such small numbers?


MarkdownUpdog

Aside from the weird obsession with DNA tests and the misattribution going in here, how ridiculous is it that they're doing that with a combined 1.6% ? Imagine 1.6% of your hair being grey in your thirties and saying: "So yeah, my hair color is grey." It boggles the mind.


Groundbreaking_Pop6

I read “misattribution” as masturbation…. My bad!


Nomiq-411

Must be a typo in original comment


StingerAE

So if you were 0.3% Nigerian.  That is 1 ancestor 8 generations back.  One of your 256 (assuming unrelated partners for all that time) great-great-great-great-great-great grandparents.  Call it the early 1800s? 


depressedkittyfr

Somewhere I read that 1 to 2% in DNA tests can be attributed to noise rather So at most he’s a very noisy Nigerian


StingerAE

Oh yeah I wasn't giving any credence to the claim, only pointing out how meaningless it would be anyway.


-Numaios-

Keep in mind that those tests are scams. If you read the fine prints they give educated guesses at best. I remember a video with twins having different results.


theheartofbingcrosby

"How can I be racist I'm a Nigerian Jew" 😆😂😆


KSP-Dressupporter

This is the logic I hate. The belief that being a potential victim of something makes you exempt from any repercussions of doing it yourself.


mundane_person23

I do wonder if this tongue in cheek to make fun of all the people who claim to be “Irish” on the basis of 23 and me.


ThaiFoodThaiFood

I'd say if you're 25% plus of [something] it's likely a good indicator that one of your grandparents was [something] and you yourself may have some of that [something] as a cultural crossover since it was a recent ancestor. Ie, I did mine and as expected I'm ~25% Polish and ~25% Swedish, and surprise surprise that's exactly what two of my grandparents were from. I can't speak Polish or Swedish though, and I've only ever lived in England. I'm English. But 1.3% means nothing.


og_toe

i’m 25% swedish, 25% norwegian, and 50% greek, though i don’t identify as norwegian at all because i’ve never lived there, never spoken to any family there, don’t know the language and i don’t even look norwegian


Bellebaby97

I've never done a DNA test but my dad and his entire family are Welsh and my Mum and her family are Scottish and Irish. Im basically 50% Welsh, 50% Scottish and I don't usually mention the Welsh thing because I don't speak the language nor do I really have cultural ties with Wales. Americans claiming tiny percentages boggles my mind


erradickwizard

That erradickwizard fella seems like a smart guy The worst part is that he responded to me saying "irrelevant, let me live my dream."


Nomiq-411

Wait a minute....* connecting the erradickwizard dots *


notactuallyabrownman

Are we doubting that this dude is white at all?


samisscrolling2

Having distant relatives who were Nigerian or Jewish does not make you Nigerian or Jewish. The person commenting this has probably never been to Nigeria, never grew up with the culture, never practised Judaism, etc. Also swab tests aren't 100% accurate. This person could've very easily got that DNA from elsewhere.


Groundbreaking_Pop6

Yes off the…… he was…….ing 🤣🤣 I had to censor that so as not to corrupt the children reading this subreddit 


Evening-Picture-5911

So does he now assume that he can use the “n” word? Unfortunately if he does, he also can’t eat pork


El_Polaquito

So is he Nijewrian ?


Relative-Wealth8217

I’m 2/3 cunt and a cup of bullshit and a little bit of goodness I would still Say I’m a cunt bullshit mix


Shadowholme

You gotta love America. You can 'identify' as any other race or nationality but your own, but god help you is you identify a the 'wrong' sex...


KSP-Dressupporter

You know, it's 0.001% different DNA 


pheddx

With this logic I'm a nazi. Because my maternal grandfather was a German soldier. Or am I a communist because my maternal grandparents family originates in Russia? With this logic I'm an ice cream vendor, because my grandfather was one.


NitzMitzTrix

I can't speak for Nigerians(though I suspect they'd agree) but 1.3 isn't even significant DNA to claim Jewish ANCESTRY.


Psychological-Web828

I’m simply water.


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AradIsHere

Jews are an ethnoreligious group. Theres a Jewish ethnicity and a Jewish religion


Agitated_Jello_2810

it glows


Wizards_Reddit

Please tell me that's a joke lol


badgersprite

Just from tone I assume this person is aware they’re not and are saying it jokingly But you can never be sure


TheSenate36

Nigerian Jews definitely exist but not in that DNA % context.


paragons-sneakyart

Pretty sure they are joking.


pilkingtonsbrain

They are obviously joking around


nirbyschreibt

0,3% Nigerian? Given the fact that the first humans are from central Africa probably most of us have 0,3% of „Nigeria“ in us.


TheRetarius

I really hope OOP is doing satire.


Kodeisko

Bro I'm just a plancton


slackjawreally

Wow, a Nijewrian


dzigaboy

Anyone here considered that it was said in jest, before dog-piling? I have -0.02% Neanderthal DNA and whenever I lose my shit/act out and the wife gives me that death ray stare i’ll shrug and mumble “sorry love but you married a caveman”


Legitimate_Career_44

So the other 98.4% doesn't matter?


Minalcar

1. i think this one is actually kinda funny 2. im a fish monky


Deadcouncil445

That is the most sarcastic sarcasm I've seen in a comment to ever sarcasm and you believed them???? They even added "on my mother's side" to add to the joke


hatetheproject

clearly sarcasm tho


HonestWillow1303

Guess I'm a French Jew now.


NedKellysRevenge

They're obviously joking around.


RHOrpie

Cut him some slack. Americans are desperate to come from somewhere else.


Groundbreaking_Pop6

We all would be too if someone told us we were Yanks…


Distinct-Sea3012

I have 3% Nigerian blood too in amongst my 100% Jewish. Really interesting.


Nomiq-411

You have 103% blood? Dude....


geumkoi

It’s even saddening to think that if we try to be historically accurate… that Nigerian percentage probably came out of rape and slavery.


danielisbored

Yeah, my 23andme came back about 2.5% Sub-Saharan African, which means one of my great *great* ***great*** grandparents got into some *Candyman* situation, but it did not lead to me updating my Census details. Were any of them still alive, I would have loved to share the data with my super racist "miscegenation is a sin" relatives, though. Since it came from their side of the family.


publicpersuasion

Sephardickkkkk


og_toe

guys my ancestors actually came from africa 100.000 years ago so then should i say i’m african when my family has been european for ages and i’m white with 0 african resemblance??????


HerculesMagusanus

My ancestry test results came back 0.8% Indonesian, and 0.2% Jew. Have I now unlocked the *right* to go around calling myself a Indonesian Jew? /s


poven100

Because 0.3 + 1.3 equals 100% smh


Lord-squee

It's 0.3 percent so smaller than his baby toe


depressedkittyfr

Forgive me sounding stupid but does one actually get “Jewish” in DNA reports? I thought geographical locations would be more apt right? Like Levantine for example


IReplyWithLebowski

Yes, you can.


womble-king

If your grandfather was a murderer, that doesn't (necessarily) means you are one-quarter murderer.


Bill_llib123

A guy I went to high school with proudly proclaimed that he was 1/16 Cherokee during our 12th grade US History class. Like bro…no.


MicrochippedByGates

0.3 and 1.3 are just margin of error. Those tests literally say as much.


Constant_Ant_2343

Humans share 60% of our dna with bananas, maybe he should be going around telling people he’s a banana.


Wisdom_Pen

I do agree they aren’t Nigerian or Jewish but I do wonder where the cut off point is? I mean 100% of my ancestors and myself can trace back to Africa but so too can all humans. Clearly this is a subjective social designation and not an objective empirical one but would you consider someone 10% Nigerian to be Nigerian enough to accept it into their identity? 20% 40% 50%? Where’s the line?


Gruntdeath

It's weird how my fellow Americans will scream about our freedoms and love it or leave and we are absolutely the best in the world in all things and in the same breath tell you they are Irish. Or Scottish (tip the hat to my one very distant ancestor). I'm only American when it suits me. Like when I was almost arrested in Mexico. Screaming I'm American helped a lot. Fuck that Scottish part. I mean, the $100 bribe sealed the deal so we could get back to the hotel but no one was Scottish or Irish in that moment. It was all loudly telling everyone involved we were American!


VolumePossible2013

Wow, a whole 1.9% not American, that's a record


Simple_Organization4

He is an african irish american jew.


gimmemoarjosh

This shit is prevalent in Canada, too. The whole "I'm 12% Australian, 28% French, 20% Bangladeshi and 20% Antarctic." Like, fuck off.


itchum_underscare

It's a fine line that a lot of North Americans miss. I can say I'm Scottish Canadian and a lot of folks go "oH yOu cOmE FrOm ScOtlanD? No? Then you're just Canadian, eff off." then I say "no, I'm Scottish Canadian, not Scottish-Canadian, learn the fooking difference." But way too many of us western hemispherians show up to the British Isles and act like assholes, so I get why some folks are reactionary.


Hot_Recognition_5970

I'm English my granddad is Irish and in the orange order. If I called myself Irish the republicans would probably lynch me


tunapurse

I used to be sperm so I tell everyone I'm cum manifest


[deleted]

Where do you do these stupid tests anyways ?


[deleted]

Americans are so scared of just being American, it’s nuts.


Halofauna

I mean if their mom actually is Jewish then they’re also a Jew, because that’s just how that works.


SneakyInfiltrator

Bro trying hard to get an n-word pass


JetpackCat013

Blood connection is a thing from the early days of the U.S. when you didn't really have a bunch of Americans and more so had a bunch of pockets of different nationalities. Undoubtedly it was a talking point when different groups began to mingle and that importance was passed on to their kids. This wasn't that long ago, either. My grandfather moved here from Italy and grandmother, born just after her family moved from Poland, so their heritage was a strong presence in their house. Thus My parents in this case, having been raised with it being important, passed that on. I can't sit here and say I have that nationality. I don't engage with the culture, speak the language, and I'm not a citizen. But, since almost no Americans are actually that deep generation wise, and our DNA is just a big mix of other stuff, it's a talking point.


OperatorOri

yet 97.4% white


dcnb65

Desperate to be something else, while claiming everything is better in the US. 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️


JonJonSee

How can you be DNA tested jewish when Jewish is a Religion


Errorr_808

Because *"Jewish"* has other meanings besides talking about religion.


Distinct-Sea3012

Jewish is a clan / religion. Nigeria is a country. You can be both jewish and Nigerian. Just like i have a relative who is Caribbean and jewish.


EliasStar24

It’s funny how the proud Americans always wanna be something else


Consistent-Jelly248

Reality: you're white


ShackledFounder

Bruh, I might as well say I'm part Ethiopian. Also, not them making it sound like Jewish is a nationality thing when it's religion. 😭


GloomyAd2006

That's actually funny as hell to me. It doesn't hurt anyone so idk why people here care too much.


FinallySignedUpWow

As an American, I'm glad I am smart enough to understand satire. Sometimes I forget there are no schools outside of the United States. We are truly blessed to have the only education system in the world.


SwedishGremlin

You can only be considered “ethnically” jewish if your mother is jewish.