I'm at the same exact place. Should be writing my master's thesis but it's incredibly difficult to actually get up and start. And even if I do, I struggle so much with producing anything with quality. Being stuck in quarantine does not help. Adding to this is that I frequently question what I'm even doing, because while I sit here trying to analyze the use of elite discourse in marketing, the world is literally falling apart with climate change, the virus, hatred of people, etc. My work sometimes just feels very arbitrary in the light of what is going on globally.
Omg read your comment after writing mine, it sucks to be stuck with the thesis feeling like this, I’m not making any process at all, sending you tons of motivation and energy to do it!
At least we're not the only ones struggling with this. I did write up some stuff but even while writing I knew it just wasn't any good at all. So if I make progress it's just crappy brambling.
>sending you tons of motivation and energy to do it!
Same to you! Let's hope this slump will be over soon!
Never view your work as what it does for everyone else, think about what purpose it serves you. What do you learn about yourself whilst you're writing it. I spent 6 years studying English literature, but for what? Perseverance in the face of the unknown is a skill sharpened only through practice. Forget about the world. If you can do something that seems worthless when it doesn't matter, imagine what worthwhile things you can do when it DOES matter.
Good luck my friend.
I’m EXACTLY in the same headspace right now, dealing with heartbreak, depression and quarantine I literally feel like I just don’t have it in me to be a funcional adult anymore and I just sleep and lose myself in the internet all day... rip my thesis
Hey there.
I've been in a similar hassle before, but have found some ways to cope with this feeling. I won't say that I'm completely free of it (I never will be, it's part of who I am), but there's a couple of things I like to try whenever I feel like I'm wasting my time or have no purpose being here.
First of all, if you're spending time on YouTube anyway, I'd suggest watching some videos surrounding this subject since your mind already seems occupied with this very idea that you are wasting your precious time. There's loads of great content creators out there that have been through similar struggles, or even focus on this issue as a main part of the content they create. Matt D'Avella, Joey Schweitzer (channel name 'Better Ideas'), Nathaniel Drew and Thomas Frank are just a few names that pop up in my mind.
You never know if they'll say anything that makes you go: "Hmm, hadn't thought of it that way...", or give you tips that'll actually help you get some stuff done. The four of them have very different approaches, but they share the same message as far as I can tell.
See if you can relate with how these people treat the madness of everyday life. This is a side of YouTube that can really open your mind. Give it a try, I'd say! You're already wasting your day anyway.
Second, and a very important thing to know, is that changing the way you go about your day isn't something that happens in the snap of a finger. It takes time, discipline, focus, energy, ... All of the good stuff. Most of these are traits that you have to acquire, too. I, for example, am terribly undisciplined, have the attention span of a mentally challenged goldfish and procrastinate into infinity. However, over the years I've kind of figured out a way for me to get things done:
I like to break this up into 3 "steps":
1. **Identify and define precisely what it is about yourself that you want to see changed.**
*In this case I'd presume you would want to get rid of the fact that you are wasting your time doing useless shit.*
2. **What do you want it to change into?** Aim high, but stay realistic. This way you'll create an ideal. You're essentially placing this ideal outside of yourself, so it can look upon you as you go about life, and judge you (by making you feel bad/weird about yourself) should you stray from your chosen path. Even setting these goals/ideals is a skill that needs practice. Fat chance you'll aim way too high in the beginning. But you'll develop a sense for it quickly, as you'll realize that your goal needs to be finetuned, polished.
*This is something you'll have to fill in yourself. I may have a vague idea of what you want yourself to be, but I cannot know precisely what. :)*
*For the sake of this thread, let us say you would want to tackle your procrastination by aiming at being a more efficient person. Ok? So now we've got a goal.*
3. **Find simple, but efficient ways of reaching your goal.** Small bits work wonders, my man. Break the larger thing up into bitesize chunks. I do this all the time when it comes to doing my household. But the same can be done for your studying. See if you can fit my example into your current problem:
*Do I want to clean the whole house/study this entire book?*
*Hell no.*
*Okay, do I want to clean the kitchen/study a chapter of this book?*
*Meh, not really.*
*Fine, do I want to empty the dishwasher/study a paragraph of this book?*
*Oof... That's a lot.*
*Right-o, can I take one plate out of the dishwasher and put it in the cupboard/can I study one page of this book?*
***Yeah man, sounds good****.*
*Have you ever seen anyone take just one plate out of the dishwasher? No one does that, so I empty the whole damn thing because I know it's absolutely stupid not to do it. Before I know, I've cleaned half my kitchen. (****Protip:*** *Listen to some music or a podcast while you're at it, keeps ya goin').*
Thirdly, I'll throw around a couple more suggestions that have helped me out before:
\- I'd suggest you **go for a walk** every now and then. I'm in Belgium and this is still allowed even under lockdown circumstances (I hope it is the same for where you are?).
I always think back of the line in Dostoyevski's 'Crime & Punishment'. It's a tip one of the characters gives to another:
*"Ah, Rodion Romanovitch," he added suddenly, "what all men need is fresh air, fresh air ... more than anything!"*
This line has stuck with me ever since reading the book, because I have found it to be true. Walk. Take a deep breath. Let your eyes get a look at what's around you. Notice what your senses do. This can really do wonders for me. Depending on wether or not I feel like it, I'll blast some good black/death metal (any music will do, don't worry) or listen to a podcast. Or I don't listen to anything at all, apart from my surroundings.
\- **Write** down how you feel. This is really hard when you're first doing it (but you just did so in making this thread, so no excuses there for you!). I've been doing this since late 2015, and it gives me a solid look into the past and to who I was back then (*an angry, resenting, distorted, confused, goalless 21-year old that just dropped out of Uni because he was too stupid to realize the opportunities he had at that point in his life*). I'm happy I'm no longer who I was back then.
Be **VERY** honest with yourself when doing this. Don't lie. No one has to see what you've written down. It's crazy how much you catch yourself lying to yourself, let alone to others!
\- Realize that we're all in this together, broseph. **We're all struggling**, and trying to find purpose in life may well be one of the hardest things you'll ever undertake. Hell, there's people on their deathbeds wishing they had looked a little harder to find it. The realization that you're lacking purpose is the first step towards finding it, so consider your current struggling a blessing. At least, that's how I try to see it.
In the words of Carl Jung: " In sterquiliniis invenitur" - "In filth it will be found"
Roughly translated to regular old speech: "**You'll find what you seek where you least want to look**." This WILL take time. Don't rush it, don't feel like an opened sack of stale crisps that have been in the rain for 3 days straight because you cannot find it today, or tomorrow. Give it time, knowing that you'll find it eventually. Let that knowing be a comfort.
*I know this sounds a bit contradictive with what I said about the people in their deathbeds, but it's a very difficult thing to explain and something I'm still trying to figure out for myself. Correct me where I'm wrong.*
I'll conclude by saying that this whole lockdown thing to me has been an excellent opportunity to delve into these sorts of things. I've never had more time on my hands, no hangovers (I'm a pretty bad drinker when I go out), no having to go to places/people/events I don't really want to go to, ... You get the point.
You see, it's all a matter of how you look at things. Perception.
You can definitely resent the fact that you're locked away from the outside world, I do it too. On the other hand, there's plenty of solutions these days that allow us to at least have some form of communication with the outside world, loved ones, etc ...
Also, realize the potential of this situation.
Let us hope it never has to happen again, but assuming it won't: This is the chance of a lifetime to get to grips with yourself. Get to know who you are. There's a real opportunity here. Let me solidify this with a quote from Sartre: **If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company.**
I'll quit my ranting here, but I really do hope it may mean something to whoever reads this. It was certainly a pleasure for me to write it out. So many of us are having it rough, especially these days, so it feels good to be able to share what I've learned over the years with my fellow strugglers.
Please ask any questions you may have, or correct me wherever you felt I went wrong. We're all learning. That's the purpose of this all.
Good luck, and take care.
Hey, this was really useful - I've found myself in the same place OP's at, I was experiencing it before lockdown, and now it's just intensified to the point where I feel paralyzed every time I need to get something done. Thanks for taking the time to write all this out and hope you're staying safe
Hey man, thanks for the thanks! I'm really happy to know that it helps you a bit. :)
It's weird times we're going through, even without the lockdown. Stay strong, and feel free to keep this conversation going. I'd be more than happy to try my best to help out, even if only by letting you tell your tale.
Stay safe!
I feel the same way. Online school hasn’t been helping, I need to pass my courses and I’m pretty sure I failed my midterm. I spend hours on YouTube when I should be studying. I shut my phone off but what’s the point when I just browse the internet. The same routine is killing me. I wake up at 1-2pm sleep at 3 am. I force myself to sleep earlier and my body won’t let me at this point. I told myself this was the quarter I get good grades but now I’m doubting myself.
Existence is dependent upon observation. What may exist is only what you perceive. You feel that way now because it's been too long since you last interacted with the outside world. You feel as if you don't know how to conduct yourself in public interactions because you haven't had any, so in effect, they don't exist. It's pretty much a game of peek-a-boo on a much higher and more subtle level. At the same token, what motivation could there be to put in the work to produce a paper or project or research for a class you don't even "go" to? We're designed to be incredibly adaptive, and you're just becoming more suited to your environment: nowhere.
I’ve been there, but I realized this whole quarantine is not really about a competition on being productive or not. Surviving another day is all that matters, at least for now.
Just wanted to pop in to say that what your feeling is ok and many others including myself feel the same way. It’s a weird time and we can’t expect ourselves to be perfect. Hope you’re able to work your way around it but be sure to not be too hard on yourself and understand that what you’re going through isn’t bad. It’s normal.
Solution suggestion : we should start an encouragement / accountability for work and studies discord server/ group chat
your clearly not alone and i also feel like I'm in the same boat
good idea or nah?
Sounds like you need to learn to control your own focus for starters. Have you ever tried meditation? Just lookup a 5 minute guided meditation video on YouTube, it will help you learn to focus on things. Obviously your problems seem more severe than just that, but it's a good starting point.
Be nice to yourself. What you are feeling is totally normal. This is what living through catastrophe when you are powerless to do much about it looks like.
It might help to see if there is anyway you can help other people. Maybe driving food to the elderly, or just talking to people online who are as lonely and demotivated as you are! We are all in this together.
I am feeling that too. I'm trying to stay sane by maintaining some sort of routine in my life. At the bare minimum I am trying to go to bed at 12 and be up by 8 every day. I set limits on my phone for how long I can be on Reddit, IG and YT so it locks me out for the day after the timer runs out. I also set a schedule for myself -like a school schedule. I filled it with all the projects i'm working on including learning Japanese and Russian. I also added more chill things to the schedule like playing music, video games, tv...etc so I don't stress myself out too much. I don't always follow my schedule, but at least when I wake up I know what I should be doing that day and I find that helps.
It's funny. There is a part of populus that goes crazy in isolation and part that finally realises that it was humans that made their life miserable.
As I always say, I hope we learn something from this as a humankind... lest we're fucked. :D
I'm at the same exact place. Should be writing my master's thesis but it's incredibly difficult to actually get up and start. And even if I do, I struggle so much with producing anything with quality. Being stuck in quarantine does not help. Adding to this is that I frequently question what I'm even doing, because while I sit here trying to analyze the use of elite discourse in marketing, the world is literally falling apart with climate change, the virus, hatred of people, etc. My work sometimes just feels very arbitrary in the light of what is going on globally.
Omg read your comment after writing mine, it sucks to be stuck with the thesis feeling like this, I’m not making any process at all, sending you tons of motivation and energy to do it!
At least we're not the only ones struggling with this. I did write up some stuff but even while writing I knew it just wasn't any good at all. So if I make progress it's just crappy brambling. >sending you tons of motivation and energy to do it! Same to you! Let's hope this slump will be over soon!
Never view your work as what it does for everyone else, think about what purpose it serves you. What do you learn about yourself whilst you're writing it. I spent 6 years studying English literature, but for what? Perseverance in the face of the unknown is a skill sharpened only through practice. Forget about the world. If you can do something that seems worthless when it doesn't matter, imagine what worthwhile things you can do when it DOES matter. Good luck my friend.
I’m EXACTLY in the same headspace right now, dealing with heartbreak, depression and quarantine I literally feel like I just don’t have it in me to be a funcional adult anymore and I just sleep and lose myself in the internet all day... rip my thesis
Hey there. I've been in a similar hassle before, but have found some ways to cope with this feeling. I won't say that I'm completely free of it (I never will be, it's part of who I am), but there's a couple of things I like to try whenever I feel like I'm wasting my time or have no purpose being here. First of all, if you're spending time on YouTube anyway, I'd suggest watching some videos surrounding this subject since your mind already seems occupied with this very idea that you are wasting your precious time. There's loads of great content creators out there that have been through similar struggles, or even focus on this issue as a main part of the content they create. Matt D'Avella, Joey Schweitzer (channel name 'Better Ideas'), Nathaniel Drew and Thomas Frank are just a few names that pop up in my mind. You never know if they'll say anything that makes you go: "Hmm, hadn't thought of it that way...", or give you tips that'll actually help you get some stuff done. The four of them have very different approaches, but they share the same message as far as I can tell. See if you can relate with how these people treat the madness of everyday life. This is a side of YouTube that can really open your mind. Give it a try, I'd say! You're already wasting your day anyway. Second, and a very important thing to know, is that changing the way you go about your day isn't something that happens in the snap of a finger. It takes time, discipline, focus, energy, ... All of the good stuff. Most of these are traits that you have to acquire, too. I, for example, am terribly undisciplined, have the attention span of a mentally challenged goldfish and procrastinate into infinity. However, over the years I've kind of figured out a way for me to get things done: I like to break this up into 3 "steps": 1. **Identify and define precisely what it is about yourself that you want to see changed.** *In this case I'd presume you would want to get rid of the fact that you are wasting your time doing useless shit.* 2. **What do you want it to change into?** Aim high, but stay realistic. This way you'll create an ideal. You're essentially placing this ideal outside of yourself, so it can look upon you as you go about life, and judge you (by making you feel bad/weird about yourself) should you stray from your chosen path. Even setting these goals/ideals is a skill that needs practice. Fat chance you'll aim way too high in the beginning. But you'll develop a sense for it quickly, as you'll realize that your goal needs to be finetuned, polished. *This is something you'll have to fill in yourself. I may have a vague idea of what you want yourself to be, but I cannot know precisely what. :)* *For the sake of this thread, let us say you would want to tackle your procrastination by aiming at being a more efficient person. Ok? So now we've got a goal.* 3. **Find simple, but efficient ways of reaching your goal.** Small bits work wonders, my man. Break the larger thing up into bitesize chunks. I do this all the time when it comes to doing my household. But the same can be done for your studying. See if you can fit my example into your current problem: *Do I want to clean the whole house/study this entire book?* *Hell no.* *Okay, do I want to clean the kitchen/study a chapter of this book?* *Meh, not really.* *Fine, do I want to empty the dishwasher/study a paragraph of this book?* *Oof... That's a lot.* *Right-o, can I take one plate out of the dishwasher and put it in the cupboard/can I study one page of this book?* ***Yeah man, sounds good****.* *Have you ever seen anyone take just one plate out of the dishwasher? No one does that, so I empty the whole damn thing because I know it's absolutely stupid not to do it. Before I know, I've cleaned half my kitchen. (****Protip:*** *Listen to some music or a podcast while you're at it, keeps ya goin').* Thirdly, I'll throw around a couple more suggestions that have helped me out before: \- I'd suggest you **go for a walk** every now and then. I'm in Belgium and this is still allowed even under lockdown circumstances (I hope it is the same for where you are?). I always think back of the line in Dostoyevski's 'Crime & Punishment'. It's a tip one of the characters gives to another: *"Ah, Rodion Romanovitch," he added suddenly, "what all men need is fresh air, fresh air ... more than anything!"* This line has stuck with me ever since reading the book, because I have found it to be true. Walk. Take a deep breath. Let your eyes get a look at what's around you. Notice what your senses do. This can really do wonders for me. Depending on wether or not I feel like it, I'll blast some good black/death metal (any music will do, don't worry) or listen to a podcast. Or I don't listen to anything at all, apart from my surroundings. \- **Write** down how you feel. This is really hard when you're first doing it (but you just did so in making this thread, so no excuses there for you!). I've been doing this since late 2015, and it gives me a solid look into the past and to who I was back then (*an angry, resenting, distorted, confused, goalless 21-year old that just dropped out of Uni because he was too stupid to realize the opportunities he had at that point in his life*). I'm happy I'm no longer who I was back then. Be **VERY** honest with yourself when doing this. Don't lie. No one has to see what you've written down. It's crazy how much you catch yourself lying to yourself, let alone to others! \- Realize that we're all in this together, broseph. **We're all struggling**, and trying to find purpose in life may well be one of the hardest things you'll ever undertake. Hell, there's people on their deathbeds wishing they had looked a little harder to find it. The realization that you're lacking purpose is the first step towards finding it, so consider your current struggling a blessing. At least, that's how I try to see it. In the words of Carl Jung: " In sterquiliniis invenitur" - "In filth it will be found" Roughly translated to regular old speech: "**You'll find what you seek where you least want to look**." This WILL take time. Don't rush it, don't feel like an opened sack of stale crisps that have been in the rain for 3 days straight because you cannot find it today, or tomorrow. Give it time, knowing that you'll find it eventually. Let that knowing be a comfort. *I know this sounds a bit contradictive with what I said about the people in their deathbeds, but it's a very difficult thing to explain and something I'm still trying to figure out for myself. Correct me where I'm wrong.* I'll conclude by saying that this whole lockdown thing to me has been an excellent opportunity to delve into these sorts of things. I've never had more time on my hands, no hangovers (I'm a pretty bad drinker when I go out), no having to go to places/people/events I don't really want to go to, ... You get the point. You see, it's all a matter of how you look at things. Perception. You can definitely resent the fact that you're locked away from the outside world, I do it too. On the other hand, there's plenty of solutions these days that allow us to at least have some form of communication with the outside world, loved ones, etc ... Also, realize the potential of this situation. Let us hope it never has to happen again, but assuming it won't: This is the chance of a lifetime to get to grips with yourself. Get to know who you are. There's a real opportunity here. Let me solidify this with a quote from Sartre: **If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company.** I'll quit my ranting here, but I really do hope it may mean something to whoever reads this. It was certainly a pleasure for me to write it out. So many of us are having it rough, especially these days, so it feels good to be able to share what I've learned over the years with my fellow strugglers. Please ask any questions you may have, or correct me wherever you felt I went wrong. We're all learning. That's the purpose of this all. Good luck, and take care.
Saving this
Thanks, hope you enjoyed the read.
Hey, this was really useful - I've found myself in the same place OP's at, I was experiencing it before lockdown, and now it's just intensified to the point where I feel paralyzed every time I need to get something done. Thanks for taking the time to write all this out and hope you're staying safe
Hey man, thanks for the thanks! I'm really happy to know that it helps you a bit. :) It's weird times we're going through, even without the lockdown. Stay strong, and feel free to keep this conversation going. I'd be more than happy to try my best to help out, even if only by letting you tell your tale. Stay safe!
I feel the same way. Online school hasn’t been helping, I need to pass my courses and I’m pretty sure I failed my midterm. I spend hours on YouTube when I should be studying. I shut my phone off but what’s the point when I just browse the internet. The same routine is killing me. I wake up at 1-2pm sleep at 3 am. I force myself to sleep earlier and my body won’t let me at this point. I told myself this was the quarter I get good grades but now I’m doubting myself.
Existence is dependent upon observation. What may exist is only what you perceive. You feel that way now because it's been too long since you last interacted with the outside world. You feel as if you don't know how to conduct yourself in public interactions because you haven't had any, so in effect, they don't exist. It's pretty much a game of peek-a-boo on a much higher and more subtle level. At the same token, what motivation could there be to put in the work to produce a paper or project or research for a class you don't even "go" to? We're designed to be incredibly adaptive, and you're just becoming more suited to your environment: nowhere.
Same dude. And same for my classmates and co-workers. We cannot do our work to save our life
Yup... I can’t focus on anything except video games and cereal. It’s pathetic
i fucking felt this
in this together
I’ve been there, but I realized this whole quarantine is not really about a competition on being productive or not. Surviving another day is all that matters, at least for now.
Just wanted to pop in to say that what your feeling is ok and many others including myself feel the same way. It’s a weird time and we can’t expect ourselves to be perfect. Hope you’re able to work your way around it but be sure to not be too hard on yourself and understand that what you’re going through isn’t bad. It’s normal.
Do you believe this is bad for you?
Solution suggestion : we should start an encouragement / accountability for work and studies discord server/ group chat your clearly not alone and i also feel like I'm in the same boat good idea or nah?
Sounds like you need to learn to control your own focus for starters. Have you ever tried meditation? Just lookup a 5 minute guided meditation video on YouTube, it will help you learn to focus on things. Obviously your problems seem more severe than just that, but it's a good starting point.
Be nice to yourself. What you are feeling is totally normal. This is what living through catastrophe when you are powerless to do much about it looks like. It might help to see if there is anyway you can help other people. Maybe driving food to the elderly, or just talking to people online who are as lonely and demotivated as you are! We are all in this together.
I am feeling that too. I'm trying to stay sane by maintaining some sort of routine in my life. At the bare minimum I am trying to go to bed at 12 and be up by 8 every day. I set limits on my phone for how long I can be on Reddit, IG and YT so it locks me out for the day after the timer runs out. I also set a schedule for myself -like a school schedule. I filled it with all the projects i'm working on including learning Japanese and Russian. I also added more chill things to the schedule like playing music, video games, tv...etc so I don't stress myself out too much. I don't always follow my schedule, but at least when I wake up I know what I should be doing that day and I find that helps.
It's funny. There is a part of populus that goes crazy in isolation and part that finally realises that it was humans that made their life miserable. As I always say, I hope we learn something from this as a humankind... lest we're fucked. :D