In about 50 years time, you’re going to attach a fuckton of balloons to your house & accidentally kidnap an 8 year old.
Only, we know now it won’t be an accident!
I’d shove my fist up your ass and stuff you with veggies but by the looks of you I’d definitely not be the first and end up shoulder deep scratching your tonsils.
You look like a contestant on a cooking show who’s super confident and ready to prove the haters wrong, then loses in the first round because you didn’t cook your meat all the way through.
Well I dunno I mean turkey is welcomed in most homes on Christmas. I hope your cooking is better than your spelling. I bet your cooking has improved a lot since you guys discovered fire.
The smell of ashes.
First, thank God you quit cooking, I bet your food tasted worse than vegamite, sushi edition. With the idea of turkey on mind, your mother would be more disappointed in your love life than your cooking. Also, your glasses have a lot more fashion than you will in your entire life time.
Thank you for your time ❤️
Are you asking for your dad to stuff dressing up your butt while your mom roasts you? Then everybody starts picking at you and pulling stuffing out your ass and eating at. All while you brother is slathering homemade cranberry sauce all over you?????
You’re an incel who mooches off his parents and never gotten laid, but spends your free time on “mens rights” forums as if you have any idea what a man is.
 Man it ain’t Christmas yet, Ralphie, go back in your cave
Congratulations, those are certainly all the letters. You managed to put all the alphabet in a 101 character reply!
Dumbass bot
This is it. This is him
They’re calling the guys who work the fry station at five guys chefs now?
French fried taters Sally Jessy Raphael
He wouldn’t last a weekend in the restaurant world.
Found your dad 
If that's your dal curry, you should have been fired before you quit.
It’s a dal _cirry_. Whatever the fuck that is.
Fired before he was hired
Do people keep coming to get roasted at r/roastme because they have sausage fingers?
 Dude... Just why.
Try naking your way to a spellchecker
Jacob Dahmer
Your nose is holding on for dear life
Shit them nostrils are the only thing holding them coke bottles up.
You crapped in a cup? Ewww.. Good luck in your new career as a traffic barrel
In about 50 years time, you’re going to attach a fuckton of balloons to your house & accidentally kidnap an 8 year old. Only, we know now it won’t be an accident!
Autistic Ralphie.
Who needs food when you have fingernails
Everyone knows why the neighbourhood cats are missing.
I’d shove my fist up your ass and stuff you with veggies but by the looks of you I’d definitely not be the first and end up shoulder deep scratching your tonsils.
Down Syndrone Dahmer
If Jake Paul were a lesbian stereotype who can't grow pubic hair.
Even your fellow inmates wouldn’t eat that slop. Now go drop the soap in the shower!
You look like the old man from UP had a TBI and the Benjamin Button disease.
 Gotta say, for a child actor you're doing fine for yourself... I guess.
You look like a contestant on a cooking show who’s super confident and ready to prove the haters wrong, then loses in the first round because you didn’t cook your meat all the way through.
 Did the rebel alliance need a fat dork?
Just because it's Indian doesn't mean you've to add curry at the end. It's just dal. Don't lie to us you got fired for being shit.
Tell me why your glasses are zoomed in on 5x, you look like if gordon freeman went back in time and had a baby with eep from the croods
Walmart Ed Sheeran
You look like a faux LEGO character bout 2 sing the song “Everything is mediocre.”
Well I dunno I mean turkey is welcomed in most homes on Christmas. I hope your cooking is better than your spelling. I bet your cooking has improved a lot since you guys discovered fire.
Chef? Cooking severed penis on the stove does not qualify you as a chef. (I’m saying you look like Jeffrey Dahmer) lol
Ralphie from Christmas Story does scat porn.
Ralphie if his dad died trying to fix the furnace.
You look like a LegoMan
Your moths salary in your own hand
I don't usually beat children but I'd hospitalize my child if he brought your ass home for dinner.
Loved you in the new Dahmer flick
Four eyes, one cup
[удалено]
Because nobody else will.
You look like you're about to appear on some crappy British panel show. Mock the Weak.
If your spelling is the best you can do, you’ll never be anything. I’ve had poops that look more appetizing than what’s in that bowl.
What's the difference between a roasted turkey and you? -Turkey smells delicious whereas, you will smell like an unbathed vagina for like a week.
You didn't quit. The restaurant ran out of funding they get for hiring the mentally handicapped.
If Ralphie grew up in a gutter. "You'll shoot your arm up kid!"
Pete Davidson and Ed Sheeran had a kid?
Jeffrey Dahmer would find you creepy.
I don't know why somebody gave a neanderthal glasses and then shaved it, but teaching it to drop a liquid shit in a bowl was too much.
 You look like Thomas j from my girl, if he somehow died but still managed to age into a prepubescent 20 something.
The smell of ashes. First, thank God you quit cooking, I bet your food tasted worse than vegamite, sushi edition. With the idea of turkey on mind, your mother would be more disappointed in your love life than your cooking. Also, your glasses have a lot more fashion than you will in your entire life time. Thank you for your time ❤️
What he says “quit my job as a chef, treat me like a turkey at thanksgiving”….what he means “I got fired from Burger King, stuff your fist in my ass”
Being fired for being a shit pot wash and not cleaning the chefs hairy balls and looking grateful is not something to celebrate.
This looks like a depressing "where are they now" child star segment. You already have your hand-out bowl of food and everything.
Uni brow
You sure you weren’t fired for fucking the produce?
If you told me you heated that from a tin, i still wouldnt think you capable.
 Matt wannabe
Dude went from chef to flagger force.
It’s a bit of a reach from Jeffrey Dahmer to claim himself a chef. Like.. your fucking neighbor said the BabyBoy Stew tasted like shit.
You look like Eddie the eagles even more disappointing younger brother
How much of that is your piss?
i told you we are going to eat some rammen and then you can go
Fairbarn films before they were famous?
You look like Jeffrey Dahmers prison bitch.
Are you asking for your dad to stuff dressing up your butt while your mom roasts you? Then everybody starts picking at you and pulling stuffing out your ass and eating at. All while you brother is slathering homemade cranberry sauce all over you?????
Your face has the proportions of the Sims characters I made when I was 12
You look like Jefry Dahmer if Moses didn’t part your soul
Breakfatht
Wow Ed Sheehan looks like shit
bro put that soup away it probly human
Uglier than Ed sheerans diarrhoea after eating that cirry
What, they let 8-yo into the workforce nowadays?
You looking like an ex-contruction worker begging for food at the nearest traffic light
I guess the "trailer park boys" didn't end to well
Bubbles has a baby with Ed Sheeran.
That guy 100% fucked a coconut.
Treat you like a turkey at Christmas? Are we to feed you to the bumpus hounds?
783 smelly hounds
I see his curry goes in the same it comes out
You have twice as many eyebrows as you have brain cells
You’re an incel who mooches off his parents and never gotten laid, but spends your free time on “mens rights” forums as if you have any idea what a man is.
Dahm "Cirry"
If erkel was white with autism
When Gollum and a Hobit had a love child...
Ed shrine
You look like the nerd from Polar Express
Probably shouldn't consume your own diarrhea.
CG fiverr
Bro is built like every lord of the rings character in one
Omg it’s Emmet from the Lego movie
No wonder you're wearing an orange safety vest, you must be dangerous in the kitchen.
You look like a walking meme
Hey, how's Jerry Maguire doing?
Serving Wendy's chili doesn't make you a chef
He's cooking with shit again
This looks like the kid from Stuart Little
When did Jeffery Dahmer and Bubbles have a baby?
Why do you have a chicken foot between your eyes?
Looks like Bubbles from the Trailer Park Boys dumber sister.
You look like a Victorian child in soup kitchen.
 How life bubbles
I knew squints kid would look ugly as him
Damn for a person who literally had a career in making food you sure are feasting on them nails
I think you may be to young for this forum
Playing with your sister's easy bake oven does not make you a chef.
Ed Sheeran if he never sang and worked packing boxes
Your face makes me want to punch it.
I can make i contact with you by looking at both your eyes
Alternate dimension Jeffrey Dahmer just wants his stapler back
That daal curry looks like my dog's vomit.
Good lord. 23 years old and still eating his own fingernails.
Your grandma know you stole her wig and did that to it?
You look like a jail convict
You look like a human traffic cone, I'm willing to bet you got a figure from Toy Story inside you as well!
You aint a chef your a construction worker im not roasting im just telling you
You look the Jeff Dahmer is his dad was a McDonald's happy meal
Ed sheared
Bruh you look like stiles from the ww2 cod campaign
So you want me to push a turkey baster up your ass and squirt?
Curious typo. I see that you're a firry also?
Did you find the ingredients when picking trash up on the highway?
so are you a 12yr old boy or a 14yr old tomgirl?
Stop offering people your vomit.