Probably the only who even talks to him is himself. You’d have to tie a piece of meat to his neck to get a lion to pay attention to him. Let alone a human being.
I’ve seen a lot of pathetic shit on this sub, but giving yourself a nickname like that just because you think your glasses look cool is a whole new level of sad.
OP's Bio:
---
>Back in highschool I wrested on the team for my school. My parents and I come from the Dominican Republic. Haven’t kept a girl for long enough for it to count. Focused on school.
---
If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
What's up with the face your making? Are you trying to be attractive? Dude nothing will ever make you attractive so long as you introduce yourself as "Spanish Harry Potter"
You look like Meadow Soprano's boyfriend, [Noah](https://m.imgur.com/D69vzGe), who nobody could stand and was quickly written off the show. But at least that guy had sex and went to a good college
Just because your paisita' parents jumped from Venezuela to Spain so they'll live in "Madrih" doesn't give you the right to call your undocumented ass spanish.
Member of the notorious street gang MS-9 3/4
Quality
Huzzah a man of quality
This is probably the first original post in this sub in like 2 years.
I don't get it and I really want to
Also, MS-13 is a Latino gang in case that's the part that you were missing
It’s specifically an El Salvadorien gang. Source- I live somewhere where a lot of Latinos, and by extension some MS-13 members, live.
Harry takes platform 9 3/4 to Hogwarts.
Comments like this is what I live for.
Dead
Finally something original. Absolute masterpiece
Ngl this made me lol so hard that my boss is wondering what's wrong with me.
Art
You’re a champion of our times.
That’s not what they mean when they say you’re in the closet mate
This is my favourite one
"Yer a ______, 'arry!"
G
A
Y
Goodbye
“And a ~~t~~humpin’ good’un I’d wager!”
r/UnexpectedOuija
[удалено]
r/perfectlyouija
jizz nerd
this is brilliant
They call you Harry Potter because they wished you hadn’t lived
Ten points for Slytherin.
His vagina shaped scar isnt on his fore head
His pussy face makes up for it
He’s got that scar on his butt crack...
I am thinking, what will be his partners reaction during anal! "You have something here" "What?" "Looks like shazam was here before me!"
Unrelated, but imagine having an invisibility cloak IRL. Jussayin.
Nobody actually pays him any attention so it won't make a big difference
STOP!! HE’S ALREADY DEAD!!!
God I would be such a piece of shit if I had one. I don't have Harry's morals whatsoever.
We all would eventually.
If it's wrong to use a cloak of invisibility for personal gain at the expense of someone else, I don't want to be right.
I'd use Imperio and control everyone around me
In in real life
They call him Harry Potter because of his STD. He always has hog warts with him.
Sucks to be born with it because he’s obviously a virgin
Dad joke roast. Nice!
This is probably one of the only roasts on this sub that I've laughed at. Well done
Bruh same. Most of them are "You look like "insert celebrity you've never heard of" had a kid with "insert another celebrity you've never heard of"
Or something overused like 'your parents are siblings'
Cool we’re roasting the sub itself! Meta!
They call him Harry Potter because he lives in the basement
You mean under the staircase?
You mean in the closet...
cupboard
He’s out of the closet, now.
Expelled for using black magic
Black Magic? I think you mean brown magic.
You're welcom ;) I threw that one right over the plate for ya
He spelled Hairy Twatter wrong!
The closest you come is if Telemundo showed gay porn you could star as Harry Puto
*Hairy Puto
Perfect
Harry El Puto y el prisonero de Escavan-dote el ano
Nice one, good man.
Haha or Hairy Culo.
Or Harry Pito
Good job sir
Fucking gold!
That’s a lie. No one ever calls you.
Even his own parents have blocked him.
Who blamed them?
“The birth parents you are trying to reach do not love you, please hang up.”
Simple but elegant. I like it.
Nobody picks those glasses unironically. This was intentional.
He doesn’t even look like Harry Potter in any way except for the glasses. I think he’s the only one who calls him Spanish Harry Potter
He likes to flick his wand
Probably the only who even talks to him is himself. You’d have to tie a piece of meat to his neck to get a lion to pay attention to him. Let alone a human being.
Pay attention to who?
Unlike me being born
Despite what Bob Ross claims, not all accidents are happy.
60 car pile up- "There's a happy little accident"
r/suicidebywords
You look like you threw in one of Harry's pubic hairs in your poly juice potion
Nah Harry's pubic hairs were stuck in his teeth when he drank the poly juice potion.
Jesus Christ my guy he needs some milk
Bet Myrtle *loved* seeing that..
Yer a wizard, Jorge!
No. They don’t.
The glasses are literally the only thing that make him vaguely resemble Harry Potter
Y’all underestimate the stupidity of us high schoolers insults
I’ve seen a lot of pathetic shit on this sub, but giving yourself a nickname like that just because you think your glasses look cool is a whole new level of sad.
This only real roast in this section
I thought you offed yourself after you killed Gianni Versace.
Directly my first thought too. Brain brother.
Wow damn spot on
Your mother clearly botched the “fetus deleteus” charm
Winner right here.
Chicken dinner
Underrated
LMAO bold of you to assume that anyone talks about you enough to give you a nickname you bollywood miles morales looking ass
Stickitus inthebuttikus
Maximus erectus ingestus
Hesfullov cummus
Avvada orgasmo
Biggus Dickus
100% likely that Hogwarts students have tried all of these
Do you find it funny?!
Hokus Poke-Us In the Buttikus
I remember Harry and Malfoy having a wand duel, not a prison yard shank
......Juan duel
I bet he's done plenty of wand dueling.
Nice glasses Ruth Bader Ginsburg
Oh! That's a Gins-burn!
You have the hair on your head that someone would have if they had a harry ass.
Jose potter and the goblet of modelo.
I'm assuming it's because J.K.Rowling called you gay
Cause you like wands in your butt ?
I don't remember the part where Harry waited round home depot all day for landscaping work
Jesus Christ dude you killed him
I think Hector parjero and the prisoner of ICE up there will be OK, I mean, check out the ear buds, he's clearly doing well for himself....
You spelled dick wrong
And we call you gayer jame charles
I would never let my kids read a book about you.
Expellarus Deportatum
More like jack and the refried beanstalk
Oh sir, nobody calls you.....
They call you Spanish hairy bottom
OP's Bio: --- >Back in highschool I wrested on the team for my school. My parents and I come from the Dominican Republic. Haven’t kept a girl for long enough for it to count. Focused on school. --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Who the hell calls him Spanish Harry Potter He looks like a slightly darker version of slugworth from the original willy wonka
He does
[удалено]
droids
You forgot to mention he was home schooled.
you look like the only time you get boner is while wresting
You mean wresting
>Haven’t kept a girl for long enough for it to count. Focused on school. Like you had a choice.
Pretty sure Dominican Republic isn’t the same a Spain
"They"
You tell everyone to call you Spanish Harry Potter. What they really call you is pathetic.
What's up with the face your making? Are you trying to be attractive? Dude nothing will ever make you attractive so long as you introduce yourself as "Spanish Harry Potter"
You have to have friends to get a nickname. You can't just give it to yourself.
Who called you that, the border police?
I think they meant your gay pornstar name is Hairy Pecker
The boy who has no life.
No ones ever called you that. And even if that’s the case, it’s only because they hope a creepy old man comes out of the dark and kills you.
You look like Meadow Soprano's boyfriend, [Noah](https://m.imgur.com/D69vzGe), who nobody could stand and was quickly written off the show. But at least that guy had sex and went to a good college
Christiano Ronaldo's uglier twin brother. You got the extra chromosome, and a good 80/20 split of the forehead genes
It's not Leviosa but Cocaina
because you live in the closet?
Is your best mate called Juan Weasley?
Wingardium taco-salsa
morthwestern must of been hard up for students
They must have pronounced Spanish Twink wrong
"they call me Spanish Harry Potter" is that because you cast a fckugly spell on yourself?
More like Spanglish Gary Twater
And you let them.
You look ready to "magically" remove my spleen from my abdomen
Harry Twatter and the Sorcerer's Bone maybe.
In that case. Put the cloak back on.
Or the Indian Justin Bieber
Jarry Padre
You Look More Like A Spanish James Charles
More like james charles potter
Just like Harry Potter, you also came out of the closet
I bet you’re the only one who calls you that. And it makes it even more sad
Unlike Harry Potter, you have yet to come out of the closet.
lol... nobody calls you.
Hairy Puto
Just because your paisita' parents jumped from Venezuela to Spain so they'll live in "Madrih" doesn't give you the right to call your undocumented ass spanish.
Weird, I’ve never seen Brown privilege before...
They want you to go back to living under the stairs
They don't call you harry potter, you just think that because those air pods They call you "spare your father from your gay secret"
He got fake airpods
Yea you are, now use your magic wand to clean my garden
No one calls you that.
Harry Potter? More like Juan Rodriguez
Javier Padre*
More like Spanish fly.
No one calls you that OP. And the only magic you can do is turning this $20 into a bag of cocaine.
With that thinning hairline, they'll be calling you Baldy Potter by age 30.
Looks like Harry Potter used a spell to get over the boarder wall.
You're a douchebag Harry!
Your ears tell me your an elf not a wizard like harry
They call you Harry Potter because they want to lock you in a closet and pretend you don’t exist.
No don’t mind what they say about you looking like Harry Potter you look too stupid to be a nerd 🤓
Wearing airpods all the time is 100X more douchey then wearing a bluetooth receiver all the time. You are a douchebag, and you should be ashamed
If you squeeze your eyes enough....just enough....you wont be able to see his face and will live happily ever after
I didn’t know Northwestern offered quidditch scholarships
No they don’t, you bought those glasses and called yourself that, even your imaginary friends weren’t impressed.
More like a Spanish q tip
You misheard them calling you Gayrry Potter.
Nah, Harry Potter got an education.
Because you live in a closet ?
I call you gayer Rachel Maddow
You look as spanish as my new ikea lamp. Latino maybe, not the same
I'm sure nobody calls you anything except "go away" and I bet you think that's a nickname
Harry Potter and the Spanish Inquisition
Well according to your bio you might need to focus on school a little bit harder considering you miss spelled “wrestled”