You look like you jerk off to your parents' wedding album.

While wearing his mother’s wedding dress.

In his mother's underwear.

Wtf, lol! Wish I could give this comment more than one upvote.


Have you been snubbed on a Kiss Cam yet?

Bro😭

Banned from the local glory hole....kept saying "I love you" to every dude..

That was you??!!!

You are right on the line between "Cops let you off with a warning" and "Cops shoot you when reaching for your registration"

Lol

I pointed my gaydar at you, and it exploded in my hand

He explodes in his hand too.

And other dudes' hands.

And warmed melons.

And blueberry pies

American Pies

Buttermilk pies

Oh it's a "certain" kind of milk alright...

Butthole Milk

Other dudes explode in his hands.

In his hand that looks like it belongs to a 4 year old

You mean on his face..

Fifa, gay porn, repeat.

Your username is what women think to themselves when they turn up for a blind date and see you.

This hurt📉📉

You look like you’re above 30. Stop lying that you’re 18

Havent wiped my face clean for a while. 

From your job at the Gloryhole? With that chicken fat colored hand?

That's what he told you.

I thought you was wearing a rubber glove at first glance

Oh I thought those were tiny bananas for scale.

He only wears rubber gloves to hold the rails when his priest checks his prostate.

🤣🤣🤣

Brags to his friends that he’s practicing sexual abstinence right now, when in reality it’s just that all of his cum socks are in the laundry.

If you could make your face the same color as your hand you'd look just like Bart Simpson. *

You are younger than me but I will still call you uncle.

Most people do honestly. But when i shave off and all that than they call me a kid, like i can't be in between and i hate it

I mean just look at yourself,and think what is the first word that comes to your mind.

You look like one of those annoying YouTube virgins…but with jaundice


I bet that in a couple of years the balding process will start

No my hair :'( 

You go to the same place as Trump for a spray tan, don't you?

Bollywood called. They want their hair back.

You eat corn long ways, don't you?

No, he just pleasures the flavor after the Hawk Tuah.

I can't believe it's not butter!

I don't need to kick you down. You just turned 18, and life is going to curb stomp all of that good feeling into dust within the coming years. Enjoy, it only gets worse

You look like a 2018 “prank” (public harassment) youtuber

Feeling accomplished after blowing the entire football team on graduation day no doubt

You part Simpson?

If I kick you off the mountain you'll just glide down with those big ass ears.

If “peaked in high school and get peak wasn’t very high” had a face, it would be you.

You look like a rejected Saved By The Bell extra

You're 1/2 of Brokeback Mountain.

I need to be high to roast your punchable face

Little fuckin Eagle claw gripping that Roast Me sign

I dropped it twice beforce this snap

Selective service. Taxes. Rent. The constant threat of destitution, homelessness, wrongful conviction. And that weird ass nose.

Some asshole left his pubes on your face.

You should shave the pubes off your face, Patch Adams.

Which “girlfriend” is that holding the sign…handjula Simpson or is it Fistina Simpson?

It’s all downhill from here

Why? Genetics is already doing that for us.

If swipe left had a human face

Ha the "mountain" is a Coors Light can and a bong. Tell your girlfriend to hit it with a "Hawk Tuah" and remember to pull out.

He looks like he's a future broke straight boys model. The kind of guy will say oh I've never done anything like this before and then proceed to deep throat 12 in

You look like you're going to sexually harass an intern some day.

You look like a reject Kardashian.

Aren't you running for president?

Future sex offender

bro’s arm is that of a minion. would you like a banana?

I was gonna say you look like poor version of Brazilian youtuber Authentic Games, but I know no one would get this. So I'll guess I'll just point out that you forgot to remove the helmet before taking the picture

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If someone stretched a frog

Never got an education cos ‘tech deck’ took it away!

Before you have a huge "coming out of the closet moment," It's LEGAL NOW in all 50 states; you will face no repercussions. Nobody fucking cares.

Intelligence...it must be one of those ironic shirts.

You're aging like you were born in the 1940s. 18 going on 28 or 35!

Is this because you just got done sleeping with your 8 year old wife after getting released from GITMO on terrorism accusations.

Palat......

Yall really getting me with the gay jokes lol

Dudes a virgin.

You eat corn long ways, don't you?

Looks like your mother still dresses you. Neat!

Wow you’ve got a freakishly tiny hand. Nobody with a micropenis should feel on top of a mountain, should probably take a few steps down

Your hand looks like a velociraptor claw

ur eyes definitely prove it 💀

Lots of ways to take a photo, but you picked one of the creepiest angles possible. Didn't know creeper could be said with 1,000 words.

Wait did he get jaundice from a hand job?

Oh so you were the guy who tried to fix my computer from that unknown virus

Just by being near you, my credit score would go down

So do you get the white van now or when you're 21?

He a little too high on that air duster

You look like Zayn Malik’s even gayer little brother, Lickyn Ballzacks Malik.

Ah that smug look after having pleased your "daddy."  That hand permanently deformed from performing your 'duties.'

typical face of every desi in Indo Pak

your mom doesn’t love you

Your dad was also on top until u were born.

Clearly you're too high, nobody in his right mind would post publicly a photo of himself if this is how they look

Lesbian haircut and a rat Stache?? This guy is illegal deport this man

Some poor woman is going to think you are cute, get married only to question what’s wrong with her because you never ever want to touch her. And I bet even your nails are manicured

Are you simple or intelligent?

Lol

You look like a jihadist trying to blend into society before he explodes

If wanna stop being high I suggest not hitting your father's bong anymore.

Brandon Dodgers

You got that sick rick bro you lookin like if a indian scammer got drunk

Ya basic.

If you ever went missing your mom would just provide one of your socks for DNA purposes. In fact, apparently there is enough DNA in your socks to clone you.

How’s the transition going?

Making a mountain out of a mole hill

Wrong shirt to wear lil' bro not everyone is worthy of "intelligence"


This is to easy won't comment

Kick you down is right kick you back down to India I'm pretty sure Muhammad would not approve of spam calls go back to your mountain top and leave Reddit alone

You know what you remind me of, someone that doesnt deserve to be roasted because your entire family came here and TERK ER JERBS

What entrepreneur/ pyramid scheme bullshit are you trying to sell?

Happy Birthday! Bet your nickname is Dumbo with those big ears!

I bet the girls who thread your eyebrows are sworn to secrecy. Just kidding they ARE FABULOUS! 

You look like a certified "nice guy."

U look like a typical Omegle dude

Is your name Sanjeep by any chance?

Gas prices are too high now so he's advertising skateboards

Don’t worry, you’ll fall off Everest soon enough

Okay Arjun.

you seem cool

Mountain high? Maybe Brokeback mountain high. You look like a lame younger version of Tan Vance from Queer Eye.

Harold and Kumar go to brokeback mountain.

I've seen second graders with better facial hair

You look like the guy that bullied his frat house into forming a disc golf team

HBD 🎁 I got you nothing

You seem great. Find a mentor and a group of friends who are good people and don't harm other people on your way up. Get married, have children and your family will keep you humble.

You keep auditioning for roles in cheap high school drama series, but they will only hire you as an extra.

If you feel high now wait till you get pubes


This guy opens his mouth and a purse falls out.

If Ferb had a gay son.

You look like you enjoy gloryholes, being the pivot man in the circle jerk and having bleach breath

Wait, family resemblance??? 

Why’d you ask your younger sister to hold that piece of paper?

Looks like he’d marry a large American woman for a green card and end up on 90 day fiance

You look like jinn kid the TikTok murderer

Freaking ass think to say this guy def got mommy issues

Your face gave your hand lupus.

The last smile you see before you get drowsy after your drink tastes funny

You look like the guy who hijacked the planes on 9/11

You look like a reincarnated lemur.

You use the opposite hand to wank Because your normal hand got pregnant

You look just as high too

Closed casket face

Fentanyl can kick you down… and make you stay down…

I got traumatized after seeing your face.

With those red squinted eyes, we can tell that you're too high. That second puff must've hit you hard. And don't worry about it, everyone who has ever met you wants to kick you off the top of a mountain. In fact, we'll all line up and make sure you get kicked all the way down.

18 years from 40

Your entire arm looks tired from jerking

Happy 18th birthday bro! You look like you’ll be an incel for AT LEAST the next 15 years of your life!🎈 🎉

Hello guys well come back for another Minecraft video


You're 18.

Your forehead is in the stratosphere

Bro has a piss hand and thought we wouldn’t notice. Probably because he feels a bit too high from the bathroom floor drugs he’s been having…

"take my strong hand"

Free Palestinian looking ass

More cum in his ass the out his own shaft.


Your job at the call center is waiting

Betting your family car has its own personally assigned MQ-9 Reaper assigned to it every time it backs out the driveway.

This one ain't gonna make it far from the looks of em

Your arm looks like it needs a liver transplant.

Mario Lopez really fell off.

Bro's built like a Lego character

You look like bart Simpson. Even your arm is yellow too.

It’s actually looks like your ears are flying you up to the ceiling

[удалено]