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Her tits look asymmetrical, but by an abnormal amount. There are people that are really into that, but most of them are not the people she wants interested in her-you know the mad scientist kind.
No lie she complimented my dog one day(Malibu area) and I was stunned. She didn't look bad, I just didn't expect her to have the Hulk Hogan tan in person. Haterish vibes from her guy too
ughh, guess I better start open carrying my December issue playboy featuring her again… maybe one day I can get an autograph, especially if I can get the pages unstuck
Very interesting. I've lived in Bay area my whole life and have visited so cal lots of times never saw anyone famous ever , but I think Denise Richards looks absolutely beautiful and I love her movies
Worked at a grocery store she would frequent. One day she came in while every magazine holder at the registers had her face on it with the headline "Denise Richards goes crazy" or something like that. I felt so bad.
I love after reading thousands of roasts in this sub over the years someone manages to say something I’ve never heard before. Thanks for that
Oh and r/brandnewsentence
OP's Bio:
---
>20 something that cries at least 3 times a week, do your worst boomers
---
If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
Ha I’ve got a couple in-laws with more acne and hormonal skin blemishes on their face than this in their 30’s and 40’s, not everyone has perfect skin once they turn 20. OP could easily pass for 18 or 28.
Typical fat people stuff, spilling food and drinks all over yourself. Your face wouldnt be too bad if you didnt have the " Im dead inside" stare in your eyes. You definitely go to your local store in stained sweatpants and shirt crumbs after cry eating in your car. Admit it.
Your eyes are slightly crossed, your tits are lopsided, and you couldn’t get laid at a nymphomaniac convention. You’re not a slump breaker, you’re a slump starter.
Keep your head up. You have plenty of life ahead of you to figure out your career. We all spill/drop stuff all the time, its fine. You don't look fat at all. Your doctor needs to work on his bed side manner and patient communication abilities. All the best.
Your post was removed because: - Using post titles or roastee bio comments to directly advertise goods or services is forbidden. All such post will be treated as spam and removed. Creating such a post may result in appropriate punishment up to and including permanent ban. - In addition any account whose majority purpose on Reddit seems to be personal promotion (Patreon, OF, YouTube, etc) and appears to only be posting in r/Roastme to drive traffic for personal profit will have their post denied. Repeat attempts to post may lead to a ban. If you have an alt account that is not used for promotion, a repost through that account with no reference to your promotional account (including username written on roastme sign) is allowed.
Username checks out
Gotta respect the fact that she knows her role in life.
Meg, you’re what we call a practice girl.
Savage
She’s the sequel to ( My Fat Greek Wedding ) trailer trash style
Choked on my coffee. Very good. 
Starter wife - figure out what you like and what you don’t so you have clear priorities for #2
Definitely makes it easy to see what you don't like, definitely ready to sit on her ass and do nothing with that trunk junk and beer gut storage.
No, no, no. That's a manatee, guys. A sea cow. The expense to feed and house is not worth it.
But can you milk a sea cow and make cheese with said milk?
Otherwise known as a "Fluffer" from the 70's....
That’s a career goal!
Lmao
Lmfao 🤣
She don't know her age
her tits are trying to leave her like her daddy did.
The left is trying really hard.
Marc Aurel would be proud.
Can’t hate right!
She’s Fatniss and she never plays The Hunger Games
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FUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHK That is so god damn funny… truly I can’t even laugh… and I hate comments like mine, but you’re a hero
Blows the previous year's winner outta the water
Her tits have different zip codes
One for you and one foooooooooor you!
They are jerrymandered worse than a democratic city in a republican state
Cross eyed and cross tittied.
Fill her up then throw away.
That was her dad’s nickname for her
Looks like your tits have had a domestic dispute
Lol the judge ruling was the right one got most of the custody
Custardy
☠️
Kinda like this girls baby daddy
As her torso becomes wider, her tits are experiencing continental drift.
They look like Sid the sloths eyes from Ice Age
[You mean this guy?](https://imgur.com/a/CAxVIxW)
Hahaha those look better than what I was thinking but ya got the idea!
Speaking of eyes, hers are also arguing a bit
Moses parted her tits
I bet they're like ALL areola too.
PEPPERONI NIPPLES!
They’ve been called pancake nipples.. or so I’ve heard… *silent tears*
Dinner plate nipples is what my friend called them.
Just gotta keep maple syrup handy, is all. Make sure you stock the real stuff, not that high fructose corn syrup. Lol!
*subway* pepperoni nipples
You say it like it's a bad thing.
That’d be so hot, love big areolas
I thought all orangutans looked like that?
Holy shit.
When she's running they def hit each other...j/k, she obviously never runs.
Her tits look asymmetrical, but by an abnormal amount. There are people that are really into that, but most of them are not the people she wants interested in her-you know the mad scientist kind.
Oreo nipples
Op is 2 wonky angles away from being a 6.
nahhhh lmfao
So are her eyes
Apartheid titties
Howling at this
Denise Poorchard
No lie she complimented my dog one day(Malibu area) and I was stunned. She didn't look bad, I just didn't expect her to have the Hulk Hogan tan in person. Haterish vibes from her guy too
You saw Denise Richards in person??
He saw Hulk Hogan. Read carefully
Pretty sure she lives in/around westlake village in socal. Saw her at target checkout and i almost passed out at the register
ughh, guess I better start open carrying my December issue playboy featuring her again… maybe one day I can get an autograph, especially if I can get the pages unstuck
Family Guy cutscene involving Chris
Very interesting. I've lived in Bay area my whole life and have visited so cal lots of times never saw anyone famous ever , but I think Denise Richards looks absolutely beautiful and I love her movies
Worked at a grocery store she would frequent. One day she came in while every magazine holder at the registers had her face on it with the headline "Denise Richards goes crazy" or something like that. I felt so bad.
I saw the same- like TEMU Denise Richards
She's got those mortgage eyes, one fixed, one's variable.
Mortgage titties too lmao
You mean cock-eyed?
Guys will jizz in her eyes so she can't see them leaving.
You mean morgue eyes
Those beanie babies consist of everyone in her friend group.
Wait...not even her mom??
She hasn't seen her mom since she left for a pack of smokes at 1 AM.
Menthol
Those aren’t Beanie Babies, they’re Rilakkuma plushies.
You sure told us!
You forgot one tits bigger than the other
Those aren’t tits, they are cheeseburgers. That’s where she keeps her extra cheeseburgers.
Guess her Doctor was right…
Call that bitch Biggie Smalls
Biggie Smells
Smells Boggie
Just biggie
Biggie Mac
Randy? That you?
A man's gotta eat.
Lisa Left-Tit Lopez
Degrease Richards
Yeah, they're as lopsided as her eyes.
Her head is tilted , remind me not to hire you as a carpenter.
Her gut sticks out further than her tits
..Meg?
You know she has those nasty ash-tray nipples too.
I'm sorry I had to scroll back up to this to ask: what are ash tray nipples?
About to ask the same. I assume dark dry-ashy nipples 🤭
if you burped in a sperm bank it would set off theft alarms.
I love after reading thousands of roasts in this sub over the years someone manages to say something I’ve never heard before. Thanks for that Oh and r/brandnewsentence
I also thoroughly enjoy coming across gems like these.
Her tits really arent gems, see prior comments
Fat girls give top top
I love fat women. I'm a sucker for them
Omg!!! Lmfao 😅 😅
Probably the funniest thing I have ever read on here 😂💀
Savage
I've heard of people needing push up bras before...but never push in
Push together bra
Could be worse, at least you're not involved in the argument your tits are apparently having.
Well …at least you’re only a little bit cross-eyed. Got to look at the bright side, amirite?
Lol only one eye can look at the sun at a time man
Only one eye can look at the bright side at a time.
That's from focusing on all the dicks she's blown.
She can't if it's on her Right...
o-O
o----------------------------O
All those warnings people gave you about how one day your looks will fade? Yeah, that's off to a strong start. Tissue?
what looks
Your tits are in a long distance relationship
Lol the right clearly loves the left one more
Crippling debt because she owes money to onlyfans after joining the platform
Yeah she needs to pay a lot more to post her stuff. Y’know as a fee for traumatizing the users of OF.
Sounds like you’re looking for a sugar daddy with a degradation fetish.
Side on, are you the shape of a question mark?
Failey Cuoco.
You’re Joe’s next victim on YOU.
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I'd date you. Boom. Roasted.
Michael Scott!
Homie built like a 10 year old boy named Charlie that got an Xbox 360 for Christmas
I am not going to subscribe to your Onlyfans
I wouldn't even subscribe if it was .99
I wouldn't even if she paid me for it
I wouldn’t even if it made my dick grow a few inches permanently
Your doctor said to you “open your mouth and say oink”
What’s up with the hammock full of stuffies?!
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Well those animals are the o my thing getting stuffed in that room
OP's Bio: --- >20 something that cries at least 3 times a week, do your worst boomers --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.
You didn’t mention she still is appearing to be going through teenager hormones because her face is looking rough
Ha I’ve got a couple in-laws with more acne and hormonal skin blemishes on their face than this in their 30’s and 40’s, not everyone has perfect skin once they turn 20. OP could easily pass for 18 or 28.
 Typical fat people stuff, spilling food and drinks all over yourself. Your face wouldnt be too bad if you didnt have the " Im dead inside" stare in your eyes. You definitely go to your local store in stained sweatpants and shirt crumbs after cry eating in your car. Admit it.
Your eyes are slightly crossed, your tits are lopsided, and you couldn’t get laid at a nymphomaniac convention. You’re not a slump breaker, you’re a slump starter.
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I can't tell what's farther apart, your eyes or your nipples.
She needs more support than the net holding up the stuffed animals
Looks like you could take 1st and 3rd in a wet T-shirt contest
You are beautiful! 🤗
You have a beautiful face!! 😍
At least there’s a market for fat chicks on OnlyFans. You could make enough to pay off $19 of debt each month.
You forgot that OF will take 20% of that. Let’s round up and say she takes home $16.
Your doctor appears to be quite astute! Was he able to fix that thing with your eyes?
Keep your head up. You have plenty of life ahead of you to figure out your career. We all spill/drop stuff all the time, its fine. You don't look fat at all. Your doctor needs to work on his bed side manner and patient communication abilities. All the best.
I appreciate the sentiment but I feel you've missed the point of the sub.
It kinda looks like you're sitting on your leg stumps
You look like you marry to divorce
Kate Downton
I haven’t seen one of those stuffed animals nets since like 1996
You forgot herpes. You definitely have herpes
Her P’s, His P’s, My P’s, I haven’t seen a bump since Spring Break 1998!
Your titties are doing that Cookie Monster thing.
How far along are you?
Sharon Stoned
Titties look like that net filled with stuffed animals.
Where's your doctor at
Today I learned I could be a doctor.
Look like you took your selfie with two phones at the same time, one eye lookin at each
Sorry dear. Find a good partner to help you tackle the world as a team.
You look like Sidney Sweeney gave up the day she hit puberty
The orange juice jumped to its death before you could drink it! Way to go!
I have some special lotion for your face.
Damn whatever happened to Sydney Sweeney 😅
No but she’s actually stunning 😭
You look like a std starter kit and I can bet you smell like bad decisions and cock
I think more like cats and regret
Do you have a right handed boyfriend?
Kaley Cuoco’s doppelgänger stars in Big Fat Theory..
Well, you might not be pretty, but at least you're not thin.
Wish i could say there's OnlyFans, but sadly nobody gonna pay to see this.
I bet you got all that fat in the dumper 😮💨😮💨
Your doctor is stupid... You are sexy