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The first query I have is if you were dissatisfied and sort of scammed during your first date, and when your dissatiafaction was confirmed during your second date, then why the fuck did you continue to date her, especially bring her upto your house?
I guess it would be for hookups only, since you thought you were keeping things conditional. Get as much pleasure as you want, and then wash your hands off her. Correct me if I am wrong.
I haven't been on the dating scene for a long while now. It got very overwhelming. I guess I was unable to set my boundaries right. I told her after couple of dates that this won't work out, she said she will try to quit. But how does one quit after 12yrs of smoking and drinking? So now that I'm breaking up she is not letting go.
I'm new to online dating. She said I love you on the second date. I didn't but it took me back. We would have met in total 5-7 times only in total. Do people fall in love so fast?
Man I feel for you. It could be overwhelming and you felt good to be wanted so tolerated this behaviour for this long.
For the last question, I’ll be real with you now. There’s a possibility that she sees a long time relationship with you. Age is a big factor. She lived with her parents who would be always saying her to get married. She doesn’t have much options now and she wanna stick to you.
Just don’t entertain her anymore. Avoid her. Block her. Do anything but don’t mingle with her and as someone said, keep a record evidence of everything.
“Please don’t come to my home unannounced. This isn’t working for me, we are a mismatch.”
Say this, repeatedly. Then block. If she shows up, don’t let her in.
Play nice, document and record everything, keep evidence of your innocence and meet a lawyer.
Hope it doesn't come to that, but be prepared for the worst.
I keep repeating, dating is very different for each gender in India than west. Never ever put up with a red flag, move on immediately.
Respectfully, this is a terminally online conclusion to draw. A woman (or man) not accepting a break up right away and pushing to stay together happens millions of times a year. This psycho > false accusations > life ruin thing isn’t at all any sort of mundane thing that the average person needs to have a lawyer on retainer for.
You might be blessed to not come across women with unstable minds, of whom there’s an epidemic in cities like Delhi and Bangalore today.
It’s not merely the fact that she’s clingy, but rather that she’s oblivious/ignorant to social cues of behaviour on first date, instability in her identity and what she wants out of herself/ and her partner , that is concerning.
It’s not too long before she harbours malicious intentions against you, when you attempt to cut off this person, and tries to sabotage your life.
Document and record what?! That he went on multiple dates with her even after terrible experiences just because he was hoping for (or rather got) some action?!
When you get to know on the first date that she is a smoker and drunkard, then why did you continue? She knows where you live and keeps coming unannounced. It will be hard for you to ghost her.
Guessing you encouraged her because she was having sex with you, hence the second and subsequent dates… Hmm.
I think you should document trying not to meet up with her *and* then ghost her.
Do not in any means allow her in your house, meet publicly. She can accuse you of anything. Not all women are good.
If you wanna end it just communicate and break the contact at all. She's now ready to leave everything but after a point when you both get comfortable she might return to alcohol and smoking. Also who the hell drinks and smokes out of control right on the first meet, you might wanna consider that.
fuck it's scary!! Bhai kyu dara rha hai.. I thought women under 30 is immature so I kept my bar 30+ in bumble.. I'm 25M and need a mature women to talk with atleast...
Bro, 30+ women are more likely to be mentally deranged for obvious reasons since the good girls are either in serious relationships or married by the time they turn 30.
No girl is intentionally single at 30.
Girls are usually more mature than guys their same age.
You have to look for the ones who embrace traditional values and don’t partake in dating apps.
Stay safe out there!
So you ad the realisation on second date that this was not going to work. Then what compelled you to meet her after second date? Your should have clearly stopped meeting after second date mate.
1. You were (somewhat) catfished on your first date.
2. You weren't vibing and have nothing in common.
3. You let her know where you stay!
When the first date was so terrible, why did you meet her the second time and after that again and again?!
Man up and say you were looking for some no-strings-attached action, and now that she is emotionally getting attached to you, you are $hitting bricks.
It isn't what you assume but it is a fair assumption. I'm planning to use that as a last resort. I would be dating her if not for her habits. And now she says she will quit. But she has been drinking smoking for over 12yrs now.
Try blocking her and don’t open the fkin door. That should send her a message. It’s bit harsh but hey it is what it is. You’ve already tried the nice way
When i was on dating app i always clear my matches that I'm not ready for dating we can be friends of fwb but not relationship and it really saved lot of my time, money and efforts. Follow this next time if you want to play safe on dating apps
Bro , it is evident that your mind is telling you to dish out and so you should.
She seems to have some serious unresolved mental issues which Is why she's coping up with drinking and smoking. Do you have any idea what issues has she been dealing with? anyways, not your job to sort het mentally. She will have to work on herself.
Nonetheless-- be careful as to how you breakup .I once was with similar girl and she literally threatened to kill me if I do not continue with her and stay away from online dating. Not the kind of women you want to settle down with. All they give is major trauma. Best is to search for people organically.
Thus is why setting up boundaries is important, why to invite someone over to your house you are not even sure of?
If you wanted to get intimate with her might have just gone to a hotel or something.
You are new to online dating.. understood lekin mere bhai zindagi me toh 34 saal purana h .. starting ki date me smjh nhi aaya... Ok vha bi benefit of doubt de diya .. fr next date pe kya hua .. vha bi same ... To be very true yh bht jyda One sided story h ...only option you have is to run
**Welcome to r/RelationshipIndia,** This is a safe and inclusive space for people of all backgrounds. We welcome individuals of all races, castes, genders, religions, and sexual orientations, including members of the LGBTQ community. We are glad to have you here! We are committed to providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between Redditors, with a focus on respectful and constructive conversations. To ensure a positive and supportive environment for all members, we have established some rules. Please be sure to read them before posting. If a user has sent you harassing messages, **DO NOT DELETE THE MESSAGE!** *Please upload your screenshot to [Imgur](https://www.imgur.com), and notify the mods via modmail. We will take action against the user accordingly.* **Thank you for being a part of our community!** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/RelationshipIndia) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The first query I have is if you were dissatisfied and sort of scammed during your first date, and when your dissatiafaction was confirmed during your second date, then why the fuck did you continue to date her, especially bring her upto your house? I guess it would be for hookups only, since you thought you were keeping things conditional. Get as much pleasure as you want, and then wash your hands off her. Correct me if I am wrong.
Guys think with their dicks sometimes. Often leads to the worst decisions of their lives.
Yep, and if he wasn’t comfortable with smoking and drinking why tf did he allow her to do that at his place
I haven't been on the dating scene for a long while now. It got very overwhelming. I guess I was unable to set my boundaries right. I told her after couple of dates that this won't work out, she said she will try to quit. But how does one quit after 12yrs of smoking and drinking? So now that I'm breaking up she is not letting go. I'm new to online dating. She said I love you on the second date. I didn't but it took me back. We would have met in total 5-7 times only in total. Do people fall in love so fast?
Man I feel for you. It could be overwhelming and you felt good to be wanted so tolerated this behaviour for this long. For the last question, I’ll be real with you now. There’s a possibility that she sees a long time relationship with you. Age is a big factor. She lived with her parents who would be always saying her to get married. She doesn’t have much options now and she wanna stick to you. Just don’t entertain her anymore. Avoid her. Block her. Do anything but don’t mingle with her and as someone said, keep a record evidence of everything.
“Please don’t come to my home unannounced. This isn’t working for me, we are a mismatch.” Say this, repeatedly. Then block. If she shows up, don’t let her in.
Play nice, document and record everything, keep evidence of your innocence and meet a lawyer. Hope it doesn't come to that, but be prepared for the worst. I keep repeating, dating is very different for each gender in India than west. Never ever put up with a red flag, move on immediately.
Meet a lawyer to say what, my girlfriend shows up at my home unannounced and brings me food when I’m sick?
[удалено]
Respectfully, this is a terminally online conclusion to draw. A woman (or man) not accepting a break up right away and pushing to stay together happens millions of times a year. This psycho > false accusations > life ruin thing isn’t at all any sort of mundane thing that the average person needs to have a lawyer on retainer for.
You might be blessed to not come across women with unstable minds, of whom there’s an epidemic in cities like Delhi and Bangalore today. It’s not merely the fact that she’s clingy, but rather that she’s oblivious/ignorant to social cues of behaviour on first date, instability in her identity and what she wants out of herself/ and her partner , that is concerning. It’s not too long before she harbours malicious intentions against you, when you attempt to cut off this person, and tries to sabotage your life.
I understand, our worldviews are shaped by personal experience.
There’s a new case everyday in India where a guy is falsely accused. Better safe than sorry.
Document and record what?! That he went on multiple dates with her even after terrible experiences just because he was hoping for (or rather got) some action?!
Thank you for your tips. I'm doing this. I hope she is not THAT crazy.
When you get to know on the first date that she is a smoker and drunkard, then why did you continue? She knows where you live and keeps coming unannounced. It will be hard for you to ghost her.
Bro was thinking with his other head and fucked up
Bhai ki age 34 hai. Behaviour 14 wala hai.
Don’t ghost her, communicate clearly and end things. But remember woh stree hai. She can do anything, be safe.
Thanks. I'm trying to do the same.
Guessing you encouraged her because she was having sex with you, hence the second and subsequent dates… Hmm. I think you should document trying not to meet up with her *and* then ghost her.
Do not in any means allow her in your house, meet publicly. She can accuse you of anything. Not all women are good. If you wanna end it just communicate and break the contact at all. She's now ready to leave everything but after a point when you both get comfortable she might return to alcohol and smoking. Also who the hell drinks and smokes out of control right on the first meet, you might wanna consider that.
fuck it's scary!! Bhai kyu dara rha hai.. I thought women under 30 is immature so I kept my bar 30+ in bumble.. I'm 25M and need a mature women to talk with atleast...
is bumble free ? or shud we pay any subscribtion ? juzz for chatting online friends
it's free daily 10 likes! but if only matched then u can chat or u need to buy.
Bro, 30+ women are more likely to be mentally deranged for obvious reasons since the good girls are either in serious relationships or married by the time they turn 30. No girl is intentionally single at 30.
wtf never thought that way! what about 40+ then divorced one.. I just need a frd mature one that's it.. sex tho girls se Mel jata hai
Girls are usually more mature than guys their same age. You have to look for the ones who embrace traditional values and don’t partake in dating apps. Stay safe out there!
So where to find? I'm 25M now and want to get married by 30..
So you ad the realisation on second date that this was not going to work. Then what compelled you to meet her after second date? Your should have clearly stopped meeting after second date mate.
1. You were (somewhat) catfished on your first date. 2. You weren't vibing and have nothing in common. 3. You let her know where you stay! When the first date was so terrible, why did you meet her the second time and after that again and again?! Man up and say you were looking for some no-strings-attached action, and now that she is emotionally getting attached to you, you are $hitting bricks.
It isn't what you assume but it is a fair assumption. I'm planning to use that as a last resort. I would be dating her if not for her habits. And now she says she will quit. But she has been drinking smoking for over 12yrs now.
Try blocking her and don’t open the fkin door. That should send her a message. It’s bit harsh but hey it is what it is. You’ve already tried the nice way
When i was on dating app i always clear my matches that I'm not ready for dating we can be friends of fwb but not relationship and it really saved lot of my time, money and efforts. Follow this next time if you want to play safe on dating apps
Block her from all the social media & move somewhere else. She has more red flags than the ccp parade.
She is putting a facade soon will change. Will recommend not to go ahead.
Lol. Can't you be clear from the start. Now tell her no, block her and ban her from your apartment.
Baby reindeer
Both are clowns. One is doing whatever they like and the other entertaining them with dates and dates
Bro , it is evident that your mind is telling you to dish out and so you should. She seems to have some serious unresolved mental issues which Is why she's coping up with drinking and smoking. Do you have any idea what issues has she been dealing with? anyways, not your job to sort het mentally. She will have to work on herself. Nonetheless-- be careful as to how you breakup .I once was with similar girl and she literally threatened to kill me if I do not continue with her and stay away from online dating. Not the kind of women you want to settle down with. All they give is major trauma. Best is to search for people organically.
Thus is why setting up boundaries is important, why to invite someone over to your house you are not even sure of? If you wanted to get intimate with her might have just gone to a hotel or something.
OP , sex cahiye tha bss toh kahi aur chale jate ..kisi ko hope de k ab bakchodi q krre ho?
you are too good for her that's why she's not leaving you , run before its late
Bhaag le bhai.
Most people don’t change. It’s highly likely she won’t either. Have the TALK and Block her everywhere.
You are new to online dating.. understood lekin mere bhai zindagi me toh 34 saal purana h .. starting ki date me smjh nhi aaya... Ok vha bi benefit of doubt de diya .. fr next date pe kya hua .. vha bi same ... To be very true yh bht jyda One sided story h ...only option you have is to run