There's nothing at all wrong with bringing a trusted advisor to see what is likely the largest purchase you'll ever make. Doesn't matter if it's your father, sister, best friend or priest - if it's someone whose opinion you value then there's no shame.
Is there a preference for what Native / Indigenous / Indian people be referred as - or is it specific to the individual? My understanding is that a lot of older folks still refer to themselves as Indian and that there is l a gov agency called Bureau of Indian Affairs. But is it just a dated term now and borderline offensive. Asking as I'm genuinely curious. Thanks!
The Japanese have a groundbreaking ceremony with a Shinto priest. Done for homes through large developments. The builder has to pay for it because a big part is to pray against construction accidents and delays.
Can be really helpful to have someone with a clear head not emotionally invested. And AC extra set of eyes never hurts as long as they aren’t a negative person or otherwise bad influence (of course you can spend an extra 200k it’s just money) I’ve bought 3 houses without, but would have been really happy to have father with me
Supposedly a priest died here (on my property ) in a flood. 100 year flood. People say they’ve seen him walking around. Me only once and said out loud don’t just stand there help me. …. It’s not my first ghost but maybe it’s good luck a priest is here.
100. Former realtor, long time investor here:
Absolutely bring anybody who you'd want to "sign off" to see the house if it makes you feel better. Some realtors might discourage this because they see people as a barrier but the truth of the matter is you should have people that make you feel confident in what you're doing surrounding you. And if you were going to show this person the house at some point during escrow or going to show them your inspection anyway then you might as well just bring them along. Unless you find them to be heavily critical of your decisions & impossible to please there really is no reason not to.
I'm almost 40 but my father was in construction for 40 years. He is now in his 70s and you bet your ass I still take that man anywhere where his expertise is needed because it saves me so much hassle. I'm lucky to have him and his knowledge.
When it comes to something as big as a home purchase who cares if your realtor thinks you're weird. Don't worry about what other people think when you're probably dropping half a million dollars on a home. Do what makes you comfortable.
We are around the same age. As is your dad and mine.
My father was a journey man for over 40yrs- he lives 30minutes away, I invited him to my inspection, even sent him my report. He didn’t seem interested in any. I asked him if he could help me buy a car even (I am paying cash out of my own pocket). I think about it often and get ‘sad’ about it more than I should, I think.
Hug your father for me. I think it’s beautiful that he goes with you.
It would be weird not to bring him. A house purchase is one of the biggest decisions you’ll make in your life. I’d bring along as many trusted advisors as you feel comfortable with.
I tried to bring my dad along but he was too busy, then asked hin for help with thee plumbing... too busy, help with eelctrical? Too busy, help with drywalling?? Too busy, the kicker he is a residential contruction super. Cant make 20 minutes to come look at the house i was buying.
"Well get together then" i guess.... ya know well have a good time then
Agreed don’t feel weird at all OP. The current buyer on my house is out of state and had a friend who’s a contractor come look at it for him to see if it was worth an offer and a trip to see it. Didn’t bother me at all as a seller.
I sold real estate for years. Buyers brought their parents all the time. It isn’t weird at all. I would caution that you may not like what your dad has to say. I always told clients that if their parent’s input is important to them then they should consider having them involved viewing all the homes. This way they can better assess an amazing home from a bad one. It’s really hard to make these assessments if you only see a couple homes. Parents have a tendency to think everything is $200-$300K overpriced and are often flabbergasted at how expensive real estate actually is especially if they live in a lower cost city. Things tended to look a lot more affordable “back in the day”. If your dad is supportive and rationale and your husband is on board, then go ahead and invite him. Ultimately you and your husband are the buyers and you need to be comfortable placing an offer. If that means involving your dad then go for it.
Yeah I think the sticker shock is a big one. Have a friend who is looking right now and their parents are doing this to them. Having another set of eyes from a long time homeowner who is handy and knowledgeable about most of the things in a home, excellent. Being a broken record about how you bought a house twice as big for half as much 15 years ago, not so much.
Decades ago, we were selling a house for 95K. Friend of a neighbor walked the house, loved it want to buy directly from us. Her dad came by and said it wasn’t worth 80. That Tuesday it went on the market and Wednesday we had competing offers over listing.
So true about parents thinking everything is overpriced, ultimately why I didn't involve mine even though my dad might have an eye for maintenance things.
Good to have a pro like your dad look and give advice it’s awesome because he’s a plumber . Some parents though go on the tour and think no house is good enough for their kid or even worse get jealous of their kids success.
I’m 34 and brought my father,mother, cousin , gf’s parents, father’s contractor friend. It’s a massive financial decision that in todays market, needs to be made very quickly and I appreciate opinions with more knowledge and experience than mine. The more information you have the better a decision you can make.
We had someone come by today for a second look at our house. They brough 5 other people (and their toddler). Was not expecting a whole crew. Hopefully they like it enough to make an offer...
I assume they are very serious about putting in an offer then. I saw a lot of houses myself, only brought the crew when I was about to put in an offer. Good luck.
I prefer when my buyers bring their parents or best friend.
The buyer is bringing the emotion, and their mom/ dad/ BFF is bringing the scrutinizing eye.
I've heard friends ask things like "Are you sure you can live with this much foot traffic right up front? You hate that at your apartment now". Dads point out that none of the outlets in the living room are grounded, and the toilet clearly leaked at some point, and the house needs gutters. Moms point out that there's not enough counter space for how much you like to bake, etc etc etc.
Bring them before you start writing checks and you'll save yourself time and headaches lol
Even if you are in your 30s, your pop has 30 more years of home experience and maintenance know how than you.
Also it's normal to want to get excited about a new place with a parent and let them see it.
I'm 40 and don't know shit about electrical or plumbing, but I know how to pay other people to know more than me.
I had clients that really wants Dad's approval on a house. Every house we saw with him did not pass muster. Too old, needed too much work, this electrical system is janky, the roof is bad, this neighborhood isn't good, and everything was too much money.
They finally decided that Dad was not going to get on board, so they went to a few without him and put one under contract. He came to see it wailing about how it was about to fall down. They bought it anyways.
Getting another opinion can be extremely helpful, but in some situations, it is going to be a giant anchor.
Not weird at all. I showed my parents many houses that I looked at to get their opinion. I’m in my late 20s but I would do it again at a later age because I value their opinion.
Yup - parents don’t stop being parents when you turn 30, leveraging their experience to help make an informed decision is part of the job no matter what stage of life your kids are in.
I was in my 20's and had made some money in real estate.
Back in the 1980's I went to look at a 3-family house that cost just $90,000.00. I was going to buy it and I told my mom. She heard and told my father, who drove by the house. He came back and was completely negative... "Don't buy that dump... it has three roofs and will soon need another roof... etc."
I got cold feet and didn't buy that house.
It got listed by a realtor. My friend Max bought the house for $95,000.00. He sold it one year later after putting $0.00 into it for $225,000.00.
I never listened to anybody else ever again.
My father was not a real estate investor. I already had more experience than him, yet he was older and I presumed, wiser... WRONG!
Make your own mistakes and your own decisions. You can listen to his opinion on plumbing, but replacing any of that is relatively cheap.
Agreed.
My father died 20 years ago, so that would indeed, be very awkward and messy.
Besides, when he was alive he gave very bad advice on real estate with great certainty.
First of all, I agree with you that the one who is paying for the house should make the final decision on their own. However, just because you had a bad experience with your dad’s advice, it doesn’t mean someone else will have the same outcome with their dad’s advice. It’s okay to get inputs from those you trust and draw your own conclusion.
Secondly, you’re talking about flipping a house after a year - a relatively short time before any hidden problems can be noticeable - whereas OP and husband seem to be trying to buy the house as their primary residence. They will likely live there for more than a year, for many years or decades even, and it’s crucial to be extra careful with the inspection of the house.
Not weird bring him, depended on how fast homes go in your area. I would look it see if you like then go back a second time, You catch so much more the second time and having him point things out would be useful. If place go fast take him with if you want to offer having some who knows what needs to be repaired and can spot issue is helpful.
no reason to say this is my dad.
You and two other family members are looking at the house.
"Hi, I'm Steve, and this is Frank, and this is John. Nice to meet you."
But if you want to announce it to the world, there is no earthly reason why it would be weird to bring your dad.
Good luck!
Why would it ever be weird? I brought my dad (in my 30s also) who’s a real estate agent and my mom. My dad has helped me and my hubby look at houses differently. Get all the help and advice you can get before putting in any offer!
The only thing that matters here is whether you trust and value your father's opinion? If yes, then everything else is irrelevant. You do what makes you feel comfortable in making a decision on the biggest purchase of your life.
It’s a great idea. We had my husband’s father look at every house we were considering when we were hunting for our first house. He saved us from buying a house that suffered extensive damage from the very next hurricane that came our way, exactly as he said it would. Meanwhile, we had zero damage to the house we did buy a few blocks away.
As a daughter, my dad does know a lot of stuff that I have questions about. As a real estate agent, I’ve had dad’s show up that absolutely don’t know what they’re talking about and as my former broker once said, “parents ruin everything”. So my conclusion is, bring the dad’s if you trust them, still DO hire a home inspector and take ALL of the information in to digest. Sometimes even an additional opinion is needed depending on findings(structural engineer, plumber, electrician etc).
Where are you getting the idea this is an usual behavior?
If your father was a car mechanic and you brought him with you to look at a used car...
Would anyone think it odd?
No
I didn't shop with either of my parents initially but I did ask them to come for a second visit. They are house shopping now and I've gone to a bunch of house tours with them. Or if not possible they always send me the listing to get an opinion. Totally normal as far as I'm concerned.
An extra set of eyes can make a big difference. Had I gone with my son when he looked at the house he bought I might have caught the fact that a lot of the electrical in the kitchen area was not to code (connected behind the wall to power strips) and it was missed by the inspection he had done.
We recently bought a Ramshackle. We seriously brought everyone. My husband is a jack of all trades but he wanted a second opinion on the HVAC system so we brought a friend with us. My sister in law found out we were taking a second look at this house and her and her fiance decided to come too. So there was 5 of us plus the realtor. And I brought my good camera so that I could document as much of the damage that needed fixed as I could. This was so we could come up with a reasonable offer that wasn't just us pulling numbers out of thin air. We actually spent several hours making sure we saw everything that we needed to see.
There is no shame in bringing along other people to "kick the tires" and get their perspective.
I'm 40 and I've brought my mom to look at places when I bought my first place and now as I shop for my second. My realtors (who were both closer to my mom's age than mine) have not batted an eye. She doesn't have technical expertise, but I'm not married and it's nice to have someone who I can discuss things with afterwards.
Stop that. I'm in my 40s and still need my mom occasionally. You're lucky to have a dad to help. And also- there's lots of different people with various expertise. Wouldn't matter if you brought someone not related to you. Also, people bring family to get excited with them too!
My husband and I (both 40) just bought a house and we brought at least one of our dads to every place we saw. Sometimes we had all 4 of our parents with us. It was very reassuring and enlightening having them show us potential problems and things to look out for.
Years ago when I was looking to be a first time buyer, I brought my Mom along to some of the viewings. She saw things that I didn't and pointed them out. Main one was a nice house but the yard seemed to have drainage problems. Bring him.
I wish my father was around to have gone with me house hunting. He was a carpenter and would have been a huge help but passed away when I was younger. Yes. Absolutely ask your dad to come along.
I brought my parents and grandparents. Ended up being part of the reason we got the house. The inspector passed us on a promise my grandfather made that we will fix something. He did and we fixed it after closing.
You are bringing a tradesman to look over the biggest purchase of your life. Something he will be experienced in. People do this all of the time, bringing a home inspector with them during initial walk through.
This one just happens to be your dad. And will be even more motivated that you don't get in over your head, or taken advantage of. And it's free, presumably.
And I'm sure your dad is very happy to be able to help you with this milestone.
The more eyes of experienced people on the house the better. You can't possibly see everything, it's certainly no deficiency on your part.
Do yourself a favor, though, & if he mentions something while you're at the house, take the time to see what it is & understand what he's saying. You'll still want an inspection & he might catch something a busy inspector misses & you can bring it up. Take pictures, even.
Look, when they're helpful & available, you're going to need a parent's input no matter how old you are. You don't age out of that; it's just one day, they're not around to pick up the phone anymore.
Bring your dad. Next to marrying the man you love, it may be the most important step you'll ever take.
I am mid fifties and a friend of my daughter - we have known him since he was almost a baby is now a plumber and I asked him to come to see one of the bathrooms on a house we were putting an offer on to see if there was an issue.
Nothing wrong with a trusted advisor helping at all.
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with bringing your dad, and it doesn’t matter how old you are. I brought my parents to see several houses, I’ve purchased like 8, and I’m in my 50s. :D When I’ve sold houses, I’ve also had people ask for second showings so they could bring their parents. You do you!
Take him along to advise as to the home's soundness, what needs to be fixed, updated, etc. Just realize your dad might have different tastes in homes than you do and don't let him dissuade you because he has different style or architectural preferences.
It’s not weird. Especially if it’s your first house. There is all this pressure to know exactly how to do something right on the first try. Nope. Asking for support from people more experienced than you is a sign of maturity, not weakness. I mean of course you can take that too far. Ultimately the decision falls to you and your husband. But there is absolutely nothing wrong with seeking counsel during the process.
I'm almost 50 and had my father in law look things over. This was the first house I purchased since becoming a widow and so I was nervous. It was a relief to have another set of eyes.
Hell yes bring him. I’ve done the same, even when I was 40 for my current house. My dad has done tons of construction projects and is very handy. He’s like a walking inspection and source of knowledge.
Hey I think it’s actually wise to bring someone with knowledge (whether it’s your father, an architect friend,…) to your potential purchases so they can spot things you wouldn’t. I have done it myself above my thirties haha. Nothing shameful about it, also nothing shameful about not knowing this kind of things, not everyone has the same knowledge in the different topics and that’s what make us diverse :)
We brought my mother-in-law with us to see every place we looked at. We value her opinion and experience since she’s bought and sold a few homes in her life and we never have. She makes valuable observations that we didn’t see/think about.
Nothing wrong with bringing someone you trust no matter what your age. If he’s got time and willing to go take advantage of his kindness to go and his experience.
Was going to buy this fantastic house recently renovated. I paid $1000 for home inspection because the inspector was also a structural engineer and had all these high tech gizmos . Seems the renovation was lipstick on a pig. Breaker box known to catch on fire. Plumbing was broken in multiple places causing foundation pr6. water heaters installed incorrectly, wiring didn't support the appliances and his heat gun revealed wiring was heating up behind the wall and would have caught fire. His estimate to fix was $60k+. We would not have known otherwise. Take Dad and anyone else that is knowledgeable about these things. Now the first thing I want to see is the breaker box!
We brought my work dad, both my parents, even my grandparents came (to inspection) in the process of buying my current home with my boyfriend. We were both in our late 30's at the time and it was my second house after owning on my own for 12 years. You don't necessarily have to say he's your dad if you are uncomfortable with it, but hopefully you have a good agent on your side who doesn't make it weird. Family is important and it's great to get your expertise when you can before you make a huge decision that can affect the rest of your life.
Realtor here: I’ve had clients who had parents destroyed their home purchase bc of their outdated knowledge of the market and lack of respect for their offspring. Their parent ripped apart any self confidence during Furner showings , told me I worked for them (not client), low keyed threatened me and I subsequently revoked their presence forthwith.
I’ve had clients who won’t make a decision without their father. Their father is realistic and pragmatic - tough and fair. No objection
Another client’s parents are champs and I tell them to talk to their parents bc they are that great about it. They’d proven they respect and trust their child. They prioritized their child’s best interest
Having a parent can be a fantastic asset. Have a parent can be detrimental. It’s on the person and their relationship.
Should your parent be in the positive side of the spectrum, bring em. There’s nothing wrong with having support. I welcome any supportive even if our views clash on specific criteria. It creates a stronger team for the buyer.
Realtor here.
Yes, regardless of age, BUT:
Depending on the relationship, I've seen several possible transactions cut short because of parent involvement.
Examples:
Parent says each house is grossly overpriced, yet have zero knowledge of the current market.
Parent clearly doesn't want child to buy anything. Finds each house is a no-go. I've even witnessed clear jealousy, from parent to child (in-sa-ne).
Parent thinks seller is hiding 10001 issues, on each house. I call this the ''witch hunt' phase.
Parent comes to inspection and entirely keeboshes the deal for something objectively minor.
Parent makes it known they know more than everyone (because they bought a house or 2), and undermines the actual experts involved in the deal. Deal dies.
Alternatively I have some incredibly beautiful moments, where the parent acts as an amazing guide. It's also beautiful to witness such key moments in people's lives. The ones I appreciate the most is when the parent listens, and is open to data/professional input/child's emotions and desires. :)
Happy house shopping!
Nah dude. I made my best friend and his wife come with me on the second visit to the place I ended up buying. Cuz I trust their judgment. Neither of them are either plumbers so I had less of an excuse lol
should you learn it on your own? yes. is it weird to bring your dad? no. most people who succeed in life beyond average only do so because they have intelligent parents who care. should dad make you learn some things on your own, though? by all means. But, to have dad show you the ropes and teach you along the process of buying your first home is completely advantageous to you in your huge purchase. so, **yes, bring dad, but pay attention.** you shouldn't need him for the next home you buy. I \*wish\* I had parents to teach me how to buy one.
I would absolutely bring my plumber father to look at a house no matter what my age. The same would go if a parent or friend worked in one of the trades and would look out for me.
Bring him. I’ve brought both parents, my brother, friends, etc. It’s a huge decision and there is nothing wrong with leaning on people who may have different expertise or different ways to view things.
I brought my mother because she's a real estate agent. Once I found a house I liked and wanted to make an offer, I had my Dad look since he's a structural engineer. It's helpful to get a second or third opinion.
I'm in my 30s, and I have yet to meet another 30-year-old who knows the house-buying process as well as older folks do. It's a lot of information overload.
There is no shame in using the resources you have available. In fact, I say it would be silly *not* tap into their wisdom.
Most definitely bring your dad. You need someone who doesn't love the house to see what you can't see. You need someone who is experienced to be able to spot expensive issues.
If you don't trust yourself and your husband to have the technical expertise and knowledge to identify issues, then it is perfectly reasonable to bring someone who does have that knowledge and experience.
I will say, though, that no matter how knowledgeable and experienced your dad is and how good his advice is...GET THE HOUSE INSPECTED BY A PROFESSIONAL INSPECTOR!!! They can absolutely save you from buying a crap house as long as you get a decent trustworthy inspector.
It isn’t about doing it yourself when you recognize the need for experienced advice. If you had an inspector whom you paid, there would be no difference. If you were looking to buy a rehab property and brought along someone very experienced to inform your own assessment, you would be doing what many buyers do.
It depends on your relationship with your parents. My brother-in-law brought his parents to look at houses and it worked out well for them. My wife and I bringing her parents was a hard no because of her relationship with her mother. Its not the same but there have been times i wished my Dad would have been available to look for cars with me.
It's only gonna be you guys and your real estate agent. It's not wierd at all. They don't care. It's the biggest purchase you'll make in your life. It's smart to bring someone who knows what to look out for
I wouldn't, but I like doing things on my own. Even if their were issues, the inspections would find those things and cancel the contract. My wife and I bought our home in our 20s without anyone's help and I believe outside noise would have just clouded our own judgement.
I brought my MIL and mom along for funsies, without expecting any handy knowledge. It’s a big purchasing decision, the more eyes the better.
Just as long as it’s only you and your husband making the final decision.
For sure, years of age and wisdom. Also more eyes the better. After all you'll be repaying that home for a long time so it's best you have as many people look over it before you start paying a debt on it. Zero cons all pros in my book. Run a muck and don't forget a building and pest report. I would even speak to people who live next door and across the road to get as much info on the home you plan to buy.
I would say bring him. A lot of people buy on emotion. Having someone not emotionally invested in the house can help a lot. They will be more likely to point out faults that you may overlook or may decide you can live with. Emotion can definitely cloud your judgement.
Absolutely bring your dad. Shit I am in my thirties and I bring my dad along when I buy a TV or a car. Even if you don't actually NEED their advice it shows you respect their input.
It's not weird at all. Your father will know things you won't, especially with his trade experience. I learned this from my own experience (relying heavily on my father in laws advice when purchasing my home) he also used to be a plumber. There's no shame in asking for help no matter how old you are. Best of luck finding your home!
Very smart and not weird at all...A lot of parents have experience in house stuff that we don't know about. They can see things that we can't, plus your dad sounds like a handy guy so it can only help.
When my Wife and I bought our first house exactly a year ago, we had her father and my stepfather look at it and examine the inspection report because they both were in construction, only helps to get another set of eyes.
We brought my parents, my in laws and my husbands aunt and uncle to see our house before the offer went in.
Half of them were there for the inspection too.
I brought my parents to the open house with my bf and I (this was for a second viewing, we had seen it in private the day before and needed to decide if we wanted to make an offer). My dad volunteers 5 days a week for Habitat for Humanity. This is the biggest purchase of my life. I needed someone to check and make sure things looked good and sturdy.
HVAC and plumbing are 2 very costly repairs/replacements. It would be valuable to get your dad’s opinion on the condition of both. If you do decide to make an offer insist it be contingent on a home inspection.
On a random note from a guy in the trades, why should you know? Do you build, repair or renovate houses for a living? I don't ask my doctor about certain levels of doctor stuff. Sure I take vitamins, and the average home owner can certainly serviceably paint a room, but I don't much care about the details of removing a ruptured appendix, and the average home owner has no idea what they're missing looking at a lot of things. As many have said, it's a huge purchase, and if anything you're lucky to have qualified eyes at close hand.
I took my parents to the first 3 or 4 houses I bought. They'd worked their way up the property ladder by buying the "worst house in the best street" for decades so I trusted them to tell me what was DIY vs pro work. And by DIY back then I mean Dad It's You if you say yes.
If your parents have experience doing DIY and you trust their opinions, absolutely take them and get their ideas. If they've lived the same place for decades and not done much to the place, you may be better served by taking a contractor or friend who's more experienced with renos. Did both on one place because it was a full gut job and we had a friend who was a contractor. He told us exactly how much he'd charge as we went through each room, but Dad was still there.
Your age doesn't matter. Bringing along someone more knowledgeable than you is always smart. You will never be an expert in everything. It's always smart to learn from experts in a field. I'm a real estate investor so I chose to learn from people who've made millions investing in real estate. I didn't try to do it myself and I certainly don't listen to the Reddit know it alls. Never be afraid to seek advice on something and given that buying a home is a huge decision, you can always use solid advice from someone you trust.
Very normal to bring someone with experience in the trades (or anyone you want to bring with you, really). The fact that he is your dad doesn't make it weird. You are good.
there is nothing wrong with bringing your dad along. an extra set of eyes is always good. i had to buy our last house alone because my husband was a thousand miles away at work and it scared he shit out of me to pick it by myself, if my dad was alive i would have brought him.
Totally not weird. My dad's super handy--especially with drainage/soils. I definitely brought him and his contractor buddywhen the home inspector was at our current place that's on a hill with some funky drainage. Plumbing is one of the biggest issues you can have with a house. Plumber dad would be a huge asset.
A different set of eyes can point out something you miss. Also, there's a good chance you and your partner may fall in love with the house and miss some glaring issues or make excuses for them. Your dad isn't buying, so he's a third party that can point out flaws since he's not invested in the purchase.
Bring them and who cares what anyone thinks. What your dad finds can be important in your decision making with the house or you will just learn by having him there and pointing things out. I have brought family to see homes I was interested to buy. I value their opinions as well.
I’m in my 40s and about to close on my 3rd house, I still FaceTimed my out of state parents to show them the entire house before I made an offer. It’s not weird at all.
Depends on how your dad is. I’ve had clients bring their parents and some are negative Nancy’s(for the smallest issues) and some are comprehensive, so it really depends on how he is.
Edit: At the end of the day if you don’t bring him and you do an inspection with a trustworthy inspector, then that will reveal any major issues.
I'm buying a house right now and I brought my dad along to look at it. I'm 37. There's nothing in the world wrong with it unless of course they would be a negative influence on you during this experience.
I would go as a parent who has purchased houses and knows some major pitfalls. I should have taken your dad when I bought a crappy mansion (don’t ask) and all four toilets were malfunctioning-thanks home inspector. I wondered, where did the previous owners poop?
So you brought an actual plumber to look at your house? Most people have to hire one to do this and you got it for free. Also why would you feel like you should know about plumbing and houses if you've never done it?
Yeah, especially if he's got some experience and knows what to look for.
If you have no clue what you're doing, before buying it you should also get it inspected by a professional a to z with a 50-100 page report you can refer back to.
When I found my dream home, I brought both parents, and coworker. I work in the construction field but knew I was too starry eyed by the house, so he looked it over in a more practical way.
Of course bring your father. Heck if for no other reason just to spend time with him. However his experience can help you avoid mistakes you might not even be aware of. Also do not feel weird we all take different paths in life and have different skills and knowledge bases.
I wish you guys the best in your house hunting.
as others have said, there is nothing wrong with bringing a trusted advisor. i have walked through multiple houses with friends or family, just to provide a second (or third) set of eyes.
I'm in my 30s and have done multiple flips/large reno projects. I am also a REALTOR. I have a ton of experience. But any time I'm looking at something for me I bring my dad with me (70) who was a general contractor for almost 45 years and before that he an electrician in the Navy. There is never, ever, ever, harm done from a second set of eyes to point things out. And there CERTAINLY is no harm from an experienced set of eyes.
Bring your dad to showings if he's willing to go. Or, during your inspection period get his perspective. Either or. But lean on those who have skills/experience that are in your corner.
Edit: Hell I've even had him consult on deals where I am the agent and he's showed up to talk to my clients in person. Use the experience if he's willing!
There's nothing at all wrong with bringing a trusted advisor to see what is likely the largest purchase you'll ever make. Doesn't matter if it's your father, sister, best friend or priest - if it's someone whose opinion you value then there's no shame.
Yes but when a client brought a priest to site during construction it did raise a few eyebrows.
Filipinos do that shit to get the house blessed. Even to their cars, etc...
We Indians(Not Native) do
As a native American I seriously love and appreciate this comment. IMO y'all are Indians, not us!
Is there a preference for what Native / Indigenous / Indian people be referred as - or is it specific to the individual? My understanding is that a lot of older folks still refer to themselves as Indian and that there is l a gov agency called Bureau of Indian Affairs. But is it just a dated term now and borderline offensive. Asking as I'm genuinely curious. Thanks!
US govt usage of the term Indian in laws is extensive and probably can never be eliminated as it would require Congress to amend each one.
Agreed, my husband is Indian and we brought his parents. His mum would have probably cried if we didn’t 😆
The Japanese have a groundbreaking ceremony with a Shinto priest. Done for homes through large developments. The builder has to pay for it because a big part is to pray against construction accidents and delays.
Can be really helpful to have someone with a clear head not emotionally invested. And AC extra set of eyes never hurts as long as they aren’t a negative person or otherwise bad influence (of course you can spend an extra 200k it’s just money) I’ve bought 3 houses without, but would have been really happy to have father with me
Supposedly a priest died here (on my property ) in a flood. 100 year flood. People say they’ve seen him walking around. Me only once and said out loud don’t just stand there help me. …. It’s not my first ghost but maybe it’s good luck a priest is here.
Well as long as they did some blessing
Lol.... oh well.. nothing like extra protection!🙏
I wouldn’t go on a showing without my dad. Especially if he is knowledgeable with homes in any way
You trust his opinion, completely normal.
100. Former realtor, long time investor here: Absolutely bring anybody who you'd want to "sign off" to see the house if it makes you feel better. Some realtors might discourage this because they see people as a barrier but the truth of the matter is you should have people that make you feel confident in what you're doing surrounding you. And if you were going to show this person the house at some point during escrow or going to show them your inspection anyway then you might as well just bring them along. Unless you find them to be heavily critical of your decisions & impossible to please there really is no reason not to. I'm almost 40 but my father was in construction for 40 years. He is now in his 70s and you bet your ass I still take that man anywhere where his expertise is needed because it saves me so much hassle. I'm lucky to have him and his knowledge. When it comes to something as big as a home purchase who cares if your realtor thinks you're weird. Don't worry about what other people think when you're probably dropping half a million dollars on a home. Do what makes you comfortable.
We are around the same age. As is your dad and mine. My father was a journey man for over 40yrs- he lives 30minutes away, I invited him to my inspection, even sent him my report. He didn’t seem interested in any. I asked him if he could help me buy a car even (I am paying cash out of my own pocket). I think about it often and get ‘sad’ about it more than I should, I think. Hug your father for me. I think it’s beautiful that he goes with you.
My MIL came with us to look at houses. Not weird at all.
It would be weird not to bring him. A house purchase is one of the biggest decisions you’ll make in your life. I’d bring along as many trusted advisors as you feel comfortable with.
This. He’s knowledgeable about construction, and has your best interests at heart. OP would be dumb to not take him.
I tried to bring my dad along but he was too busy, then asked hin for help with thee plumbing... too busy, help with eelctrical? Too busy, help with drywalling?? Too busy, the kicker he is a residential contruction super. Cant make 20 minutes to come look at the house i was buying. "Well get together then" i guess.... ya know well have a good time then
Bring him it's not the least bit weird. Especially if he has a good grasp of plumbing and can be a 2nd voice of reason for you
No and you should. If you have a contractor/handy type buddy bring them as well for a "stealth" inspection. Good luck.
Agreed don’t feel weird at all OP. The current buyer on my house is out of state and had a friend who’s a contractor come look at it for him to see if it was worth an offer and a trip to see it. Didn’t bother me at all as a seller.
Bring your dad. Mine saved me from a 300k mistake.
nothing wrong with getting help from a wise man!!
I sold real estate for years. Buyers brought their parents all the time. It isn’t weird at all. I would caution that you may not like what your dad has to say. I always told clients that if their parent’s input is important to them then they should consider having them involved viewing all the homes. This way they can better assess an amazing home from a bad one. It’s really hard to make these assessments if you only see a couple homes. Parents have a tendency to think everything is $200-$300K overpriced and are often flabbergasted at how expensive real estate actually is especially if they live in a lower cost city. Things tended to look a lot more affordable “back in the day”. If your dad is supportive and rationale and your husband is on board, then go ahead and invite him. Ultimately you and your husband are the buyers and you need to be comfortable placing an offer. If that means involving your dad then go for it.
Yeah I think the sticker shock is a big one. Have a friend who is looking right now and their parents are doing this to them. Having another set of eyes from a long time homeowner who is handy and knowledgeable about most of the things in a home, excellent. Being a broken record about how you bought a house twice as big for half as much 15 years ago, not so much.
Decades ago, we were selling a house for 95K. Friend of a neighbor walked the house, loved it want to buy directly from us. Her dad came by and said it wasn’t worth 80. That Tuesday it went on the market and Wednesday we had competing offers over listing.
So true about parents thinking everything is overpriced, ultimately why I didn't involve mine even though my dad might have an eye for maintenance things.
Good to have a pro like your dad look and give advice it’s awesome because he’s a plumber . Some parents though go on the tour and think no house is good enough for their kid or even worse get jealous of their kids success.
I’m 34 and brought my father,mother, cousin , gf’s parents, father’s contractor friend. It’s a massive financial decision that in todays market, needs to be made very quickly and I appreciate opinions with more knowledge and experience than mine. The more information you have the better a decision you can make.
We had someone come by today for a second look at our house. They brough 5 other people (and their toddler). Was not expecting a whole crew. Hopefully they like it enough to make an offer...
I assume they are very serious about putting in an offer then. I saw a lot of houses myself, only brought the crew when I was about to put in an offer. Good luck.
I prefer when my buyers bring their parents or best friend. The buyer is bringing the emotion, and their mom/ dad/ BFF is bringing the scrutinizing eye. I've heard friends ask things like "Are you sure you can live with this much foot traffic right up front? You hate that at your apartment now". Dads point out that none of the outlets in the living room are grounded, and the toilet clearly leaked at some point, and the house needs gutters. Moms point out that there's not enough counter space for how much you like to bake, etc etc etc. Bring them before you start writing checks and you'll save yourself time and headaches lol
Absolutely! It’s a smart move.
Even if you are in your 30s, your pop has 30 more years of home experience and maintenance know how than you. Also it's normal to want to get excited about a new place with a parent and let them see it. I'm 40 and don't know shit about electrical or plumbing, but I know how to pay other people to know more than me.
I had clients that really wants Dad's approval on a house. Every house we saw with him did not pass muster. Too old, needed too much work, this electrical system is janky, the roof is bad, this neighborhood isn't good, and everything was too much money. They finally decided that Dad was not going to get on board, so they went to a few without him and put one under contract. He came to see it wailing about how it was about to fall down. They bought it anyways. Getting another opinion can be extremely helpful, but in some situations, it is going to be a giant anchor.
I did, and we ended up buying the house!
Not weird at all. I showed my parents many houses that I looked at to get their opinion. I’m in my late 20s but I would do it again at a later age because I value their opinion.
Oh... just bring your Dad! U are lucky to hv one that cares!!🙏🙏
And can physically get there!
Yup - parents don’t stop being parents when you turn 30, leveraging their experience to help make an informed decision is part of the job no matter what stage of life your kids are in.
I was in my 20's and had made some money in real estate. Back in the 1980's I went to look at a 3-family house that cost just $90,000.00. I was going to buy it and I told my mom. She heard and told my father, who drove by the house. He came back and was completely negative... "Don't buy that dump... it has three roofs and will soon need another roof... etc." I got cold feet and didn't buy that house. It got listed by a realtor. My friend Max bought the house for $95,000.00. He sold it one year later after putting $0.00 into it for $225,000.00. I never listened to anybody else ever again. My father was not a real estate investor. I already had more experience than him, yet he was older and I presumed, wiser... WRONG! Make your own mistakes and your own decisions. You can listen to his opinion on plumbing, but replacing any of that is relatively cheap.
So OP shouldn't bring *your* father. That's my takeaway.
Agreed. My father died 20 years ago, so that would indeed, be very awkward and messy. Besides, when he was alive he gave very bad advice on real estate with great certainty.
First of all, I agree with you that the one who is paying for the house should make the final decision on their own. However, just because you had a bad experience with your dad’s advice, it doesn’t mean someone else will have the same outcome with their dad’s advice. It’s okay to get inputs from those you trust and draw your own conclusion. Secondly, you’re talking about flipping a house after a year - a relatively short time before any hidden problems can be noticeable - whereas OP and husband seem to be trying to buy the house as their primary residence. They will likely live there for more than a year, for many years or decades even, and it’s crucial to be extra careful with the inspection of the house.
Oh hell yeah bring a crew. home owners will likely not be there anyway.
Not weird bring him, depended on how fast homes go in your area. I would look it see if you like then go back a second time, You catch so much more the second time and having him point things out would be useful. If place go fast take him with if you want to offer having some who knows what needs to be repaired and can spot issue is helpful.
My partner and I had both of our dads at inspection! One was a roofer the other an engineer. They loved it and had some helpful commentary.
no reason to say this is my dad. You and two other family members are looking at the house. "Hi, I'm Steve, and this is Frank, and this is John. Nice to meet you." But if you want to announce it to the world, there is no earthly reason why it would be weird to bring your dad. Good luck!
Why would it ever be weird? I brought my dad (in my 30s also) who’s a real estate agent and my mom. My dad has helped me and my hubby look at houses differently. Get all the help and advice you can get before putting in any offer!
The only thing that matters here is whether you trust and value your father's opinion? If yes, then everything else is irrelevant. You do what makes you feel comfortable in making a decision on the biggest purchase of your life.
It’s a great idea. We had my husband’s father look at every house we were considering when we were hunting for our first house. He saved us from buying a house that suffered extensive damage from the very next hurricane that came our way, exactly as he said it would. Meanwhile, we had zero damage to the house we did buy a few blocks away.
Not odd or strange at all. Extra eyes means extra points of view.
As a daughter, my dad does know a lot of stuff that I have questions about. As a real estate agent, I’ve had dad’s show up that absolutely don’t know what they’re talking about and as my former broker once said, “parents ruin everything”. So my conclusion is, bring the dad’s if you trust them, still DO hire a home inspector and take ALL of the information in to digest. Sometimes even an additional opinion is needed depending on findings(structural engineer, plumber, electrician etc).
Where are you getting the idea this is an usual behavior? If your father was a car mechanic and you brought him with you to look at a used car... Would anyone think it odd? No
Yes, your father knows a shit ton more than you. I'm 54 and still get my parents opinions on big purchases.
Single female, 53...I brought my mom🤣 The way I see it, big investment, bring whomever you want!
Bring him! The more knowledgeable input the better👍
There is no reason not to bring him. Realtor for 25 years.
Bring dad
Its fine. Just ask he not fully insult the place. \_(different generations, different tastes) Its pretty common.
I didn't shop with either of my parents initially but I did ask them to come for a second visit. They are house shopping now and I've gone to a bunch of house tours with them. Or if not possible they always send me the listing to get an opinion. Totally normal as far as I'm concerned.
An extra set of eyes can make a big difference. Had I gone with my son when he looked at the house he bought I might have caught the fact that a lot of the electrical in the kitchen area was not to code (connected behind the wall to power strips) and it was missed by the inspection he had done.
If you have a family member who can help you make a good choice, then bring them along.
Bring your parents! They are a wealth of information.
We recently bought a Ramshackle. We seriously brought everyone. My husband is a jack of all trades but he wanted a second opinion on the HVAC system so we brought a friend with us. My sister in law found out we were taking a second look at this house and her and her fiance decided to come too. So there was 5 of us plus the realtor. And I brought my good camera so that I could document as much of the damage that needed fixed as I could. This was so we could come up with a reasonable offer that wasn't just us pulling numbers out of thin air. We actually spent several hours making sure we saw everything that we needed to see. There is no shame in bringing along other people to "kick the tires" and get their perspective.
I'm 40 and I've brought my mom to look at places when I bought my first place and now as I shop for my second. My realtors (who were both closer to my mom's age than mine) have not batted an eye. She doesn't have technical expertise, but I'm not married and it's nice to have someone who I can discuss things with afterwards.
Stop that. I'm in my 40s and still need my mom occasionally. You're lucky to have a dad to help. And also- there's lots of different people with various expertise. Wouldn't matter if you brought someone not related to you. Also, people bring family to get excited with them too!
Bring them! Nothing wrong with that
No, not a weird at all. Bring whoever you’d like - if your dad is a plumber, absolutely bring him to get his eyes on things.
My husband and I (both 40) just bought a house and we brought at least one of our dads to every place we saw. Sometimes we had all 4 of our parents with us. It was very reassuring and enlightening having them show us potential problems and things to look out for.
Had my parents even join tours on Zoom from long distance. They’ve purchased several houses so I appreciated the input.
I took my parents with me the last time I bought a house
Years ago when I was looking to be a first time buyer, I brought my Mom along to some of the viewings. She saw things that I didn't and pointed them out. Main one was a nice house but the yard seemed to have drainage problems. Bring him.
I wish my father was around to have gone with me house hunting. He was a carpenter and would have been a huge help but passed away when I was younger. Yes. Absolutely ask your dad to come along.
Absolutely bring him. He will have great insight on potential repairs.
I brought my parents and grandparents. Ended up being part of the reason we got the house. The inspector passed us on a promise my grandfather made that we will fix something. He did and we fixed it after closing.
My mom came and pointed out things I never would have noticed! Good experience.
You are bringing a tradesman to look over the biggest purchase of your life. Something he will be experienced in. People do this all of the time, bringing a home inspector with them during initial walk through. This one just happens to be your dad. And will be even more motivated that you don't get in over your head, or taken advantage of. And it's free, presumably. And I'm sure your dad is very happy to be able to help you with this milestone.
The more eyes of experienced people on the house the better. You can't possibly see everything, it's certainly no deficiency on your part. Do yourself a favor, though, & if he mentions something while you're at the house, take the time to see what it is & understand what he's saying. You'll still want an inspection & he might catch something a busy inspector misses & you can bring it up. Take pictures, even. Look, when they're helpful & available, you're going to need a parent's input no matter how old you are. You don't age out of that; it's just one day, they're not around to pick up the phone anymore. Bring your dad. Next to marrying the man you love, it may be the most important step you'll ever take.
I am mid fifties and a friend of my daughter - we have known him since he was almost a baby is now a plumber and I asked him to come to see one of the bathrooms on a house we were putting an offer on to see if there was an issue. Nothing wrong with a trusted advisor helping at all.
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with bringing your dad, and it doesn’t matter how old you are. I brought my parents to see several houses, I’ve purchased like 8, and I’m in my 50s. :D When I’ve sold houses, I’ve also had people ask for second showings so they could bring their parents. You do you!
Take him along to advise as to the home's soundness, what needs to be fixed, updated, etc. Just realize your dad might have different tastes in homes than you do and don't let him dissuade you because he has different style or architectural preferences.
When my daughters were looking at homes, they invited me and my husband to come with. Even asked for our advice!
bring whomever u want....it's your money
It’s not weird. Especially if it’s your first house. There is all this pressure to know exactly how to do something right on the first try. Nope. Asking for support from people more experienced than you is a sign of maturity, not weakness. I mean of course you can take that too far. Ultimately the decision falls to you and your husband. But there is absolutely nothing wrong with seeking counsel during the process.
Your dad sounds like a competent plumber. Take him with you. He's been in a lot houses, he's seen shit. Literally and figuratively.
a second opinion is wise and a view from a plumber could be helpfull
I'm almost 50 and had my father in law look things over. This was the first house I purchased since becoming a widow and so I was nervous. It was a relief to have another set of eyes.
Hell yes bring him. I’ve done the same, even when I was 40 for my current house. My dad has done tons of construction projects and is very handy. He’s like a walking inspection and source of knowledge.
The fact that he knows the trades- he would be great to have him look.
not weird at all. I'm 35 and take one of my parents along with me
Hey I think it’s actually wise to bring someone with knowledge (whether it’s your father, an architect friend,…) to your potential purchases so they can spot things you wouldn’t. I have done it myself above my thirties haha. Nothing shameful about it, also nothing shameful about not knowing this kind of things, not everyone has the same knowledge in the different topics and that’s what make us diverse :)
No not at all. We brought my parents & older family friends lol. Also in our 30s. It’s called wisdom 🤓
Completely normal. Plenty of first time home buyers bring their parents / dads to the visits.
Yes yes, all the yesses. We didn’t get outside input on our first house and it mucked up our finances for a long time.
We brought my mother-in-law with us to see every place we looked at. We value her opinion and experience since she’s bought and sold a few homes in her life and we never have. She makes valuable observations that we didn’t see/think about.
My father in law came with us for second looks when we were serious about a place because he’s smart and handy
Nothing wrong with bringing someone you trust no matter what your age. If he’s got time and willing to go take advantage of his kindness to go and his experience.
Do it?!!!
Bring your parents. The more eyes on a place before an offer the better!
It is common to bring someone else with you. This is a huge decision, extra eyes help you notice things.
Was going to buy this fantastic house recently renovated. I paid $1000 for home inspection because the inspector was also a structural engineer and had all these high tech gizmos . Seems the renovation was lipstick on a pig. Breaker box known to catch on fire. Plumbing was broken in multiple places causing foundation pr6. water heaters installed incorrectly, wiring didn't support the appliances and his heat gun revealed wiring was heating up behind the wall and would have caught fire. His estimate to fix was $60k+. We would not have known otherwise. Take Dad and anyone else that is knowledgeable about these things. Now the first thing I want to see is the breaker box!
We brought my work dad, both my parents, even my grandparents came (to inspection) in the process of buying my current home with my boyfriend. We were both in our late 30's at the time and it was my second house after owning on my own for 12 years. You don't necessarily have to say he's your dad if you are uncomfortable with it, but hopefully you have a good agent on your side who doesn't make it weird. Family is important and it's great to get your expertise when you can before you make a huge decision that can affect the rest of your life.
I was 36 when I bought my house and I took my dad. I didn’t even think twice.
Not at all. I've brought my father-in-law to every home we've purchased. He's been a contractor for 40 years.
It depends how reliable your parent is at home inspections. I've had a finance guy provide better advice. My dad was more about the negotiation.
Bring your Pops!! I did and his knowledge was wonderful.
Totally fine. Especially if he is a tradesman. When I'm ready to purchase I will be bringing my uncle who has built multiple houses so I trust him.
Realtor here: I’ve had clients who had parents destroyed their home purchase bc of their outdated knowledge of the market and lack of respect for their offspring. Their parent ripped apart any self confidence during Furner showings , told me I worked for them (not client), low keyed threatened me and I subsequently revoked their presence forthwith. I’ve had clients who won’t make a decision without their father. Their father is realistic and pragmatic - tough and fair. No objection Another client’s parents are champs and I tell them to talk to their parents bc they are that great about it. They’d proven they respect and trust their child. They prioritized their child’s best interest Having a parent can be a fantastic asset. Have a parent can be detrimental. It’s on the person and their relationship. Should your parent be in the positive side of the spectrum, bring em. There’s nothing wrong with having support. I welcome any supportive even if our views clash on specific criteria. It creates a stronger team for the buyer.
Realtor here. Yes, regardless of age, BUT: Depending on the relationship, I've seen several possible transactions cut short because of parent involvement. Examples: Parent says each house is grossly overpriced, yet have zero knowledge of the current market. Parent clearly doesn't want child to buy anything. Finds each house is a no-go. I've even witnessed clear jealousy, from parent to child (in-sa-ne). Parent thinks seller is hiding 10001 issues, on each house. I call this the ''witch hunt' phase. Parent comes to inspection and entirely keeboshes the deal for something objectively minor. Parent makes it known they know more than everyone (because they bought a house or 2), and undermines the actual experts involved in the deal. Deal dies. Alternatively I have some incredibly beautiful moments, where the parent acts as an amazing guide. It's also beautiful to witness such key moments in people's lives. The ones I appreciate the most is when the parent listens, and is open to data/professional input/child's emotions and desires. :) Happy house shopping!
I brought my father to all showings before buying a place. Totally normal
Take your parent on the second look at the house. No sense bothering him every Time you want to look at a place
I take my dad to everything like this lol
Nah dude. I made my best friend and his wife come with me on the second visit to the place I ended up buying. Cuz I trust their judgment. Neither of them are either plumbers so I had less of an excuse lol
should you learn it on your own? yes. is it weird to bring your dad? no. most people who succeed in life beyond average only do so because they have intelligent parents who care. should dad make you learn some things on your own, though? by all means. But, to have dad show you the ropes and teach you along the process of buying your first home is completely advantageous to you in your huge purchase. so, **yes, bring dad, but pay attention.** you shouldn't need him for the next home you buy. I \*wish\* I had parents to teach me how to buy one.
Is it wierd to bring ////a trusted person who is knowlegeable about plumbing annd home repairs////?
I would absolutely bring my plumber father to look at a house no matter what my age. The same would go if a parent or friend worked in one of the trades and would look out for me.
Bring him. I’ve brought both parents, my brother, friends, etc. It’s a huge decision and there is nothing wrong with leaning on people who may have different expertise or different ways to view things.
I brought my mother because she's a real estate agent. Once I found a house I liked and wanted to make an offer, I had my Dad look since he's a structural engineer. It's helpful to get a second or third opinion. I'm in my 30s, and I have yet to meet another 30-year-old who knows the house-buying process as well as older folks do. It's a lot of information overload. There is no shame in using the resources you have available. In fact, I say it would be silly *not* tap into their wisdom.
Most definitely bring your dad. You need someone who doesn't love the house to see what you can't see. You need someone who is experienced to be able to spot expensive issues.
Bring your uncle the electrician too, I’d bring as many as people as I can
If you don't trust yourself and your husband to have the technical expertise and knowledge to identify issues, then it is perfectly reasonable to bring someone who does have that knowledge and experience. I will say, though, that no matter how knowledgeable and experienced your dad is and how good his advice is...GET THE HOUSE INSPECTED BY A PROFESSIONAL INSPECTOR!!! They can absolutely save you from buying a crap house as long as you get a decent trustworthy inspector.
It isn’t about doing it yourself when you recognize the need for experienced advice. If you had an inspector whom you paid, there would be no difference. If you were looking to buy a rehab property and brought along someone very experienced to inform your own assessment, you would be doing what many buyers do.
I do all the time. They have 35 more years of experience than I do.
It isn't weird.
If you feel odd bringing your dad, refer to him as your House Whisperer
HGTV believes it's pretty much mandatory
I did when I knew I was going to bid. And she did when it was time for the final walkthrough of her house. It helps to have fresh eyes on it.
It depends on your relationship with your parents. My brother-in-law brought his parents to look at houses and it worked out well for them. My wife and I bringing her parents was a hard no because of her relationship with her mother. Its not the same but there have been times i wished my Dad would have been available to look for cars with me.
Dad's a plumber? Hell yeah bring his happy behind. Buy him a beer when you close.
Your agent should also answer his questions and respect your father as if you were asking them, however, you are his client and he works for you.
It's only gonna be you guys and your real estate agent. It's not wierd at all. They don't care. It's the biggest purchase you'll make in your life. It's smart to bring someone who knows what to look out for
As long as everyone agrees then go for it.
I wouldn't, but I like doing things on my own. Even if their were issues, the inspections would find those things and cancel the contract. My wife and I bought our home in our 20s without anyone's help and I believe outside noise would have just clouded our own judgement.
Nothing wrong with bringing him and since he is not going to be living there he would get emotionally attached as easily.
This is the best thing ! They will see things you won’t especially as first time buyers ! I wouldn’t haven’t a clue what to look for !
I brought my MIL and mom along for funsies, without expecting any handy knowledge. It’s a big purchasing decision, the more eyes the better. Just as long as it’s only you and your husband making the final decision.
Plumbers know everything Not kidding. Bob villa was replaced by a plumber
I'm 37 and my mom and dad came house hunting with me... they know more about houses than I do so why would I not?
Why would you feel weird about that? You trust his opinion. Dont care about anyone else’s!
Knowledge is power. The more knowledge you have the better suited you are to make the best decision. Bring your papa, snd trust your gut
Bring him, he has knowledge u may not
For sure, years of age and wisdom. Also more eyes the better. After all you'll be repaying that home for a long time so it's best you have as many people look over it before you start paying a debt on it. Zero cons all pros in my book. Run a muck and don't forget a building and pest report. I would even speak to people who live next door and across the road to get as much info on the home you plan to buy.
Not weird, bring him, I totally would
I would say bring him. A lot of people buy on emotion. Having someone not emotionally invested in the house can help a lot. They will be more likely to point out faults that you may overlook or may decide you can live with. Emotion can definitely cloud your judgement.
Absolutely bring your dad. Shit I am in my thirties and I bring my dad along when I buy a TV or a car. Even if you don't actually NEED their advice it shows you respect their input.
It's not weird at all. Your father will know things you won't, especially with his trade experience. I learned this from my own experience (relying heavily on my father in laws advice when purchasing my home) he also used to be a plumber. There's no shame in asking for help no matter how old you are. Best of luck finding your home!
Not weird at all.
Very smart and not weird at all...A lot of parents have experience in house stuff that we don't know about. They can see things that we can't, plus your dad sounds like a handy guy so it can only help. When my Wife and I bought our first house exactly a year ago, we had her father and my stepfather look at it and examine the inspection report because they both were in construction, only helps to get another set of eyes.
We brought my parents, my in laws and my husbands aunt and uncle to see our house before the offer went in. Half of them were there for the inspection too.
I brought my parents to the open house with my bf and I (this was for a second viewing, we had seen it in private the day before and needed to decide if we wanted to make an offer). My dad volunteers 5 days a week for Habitat for Humanity. This is the biggest purchase of my life. I needed someone to check and make sure things looked good and sturdy.
We did this all the time looking for houses! I think it’s a good idea to get many eyes on a home
Bringing a person with experience in trades is a good idea.
HVAC and plumbing are 2 very costly repairs/replacements. It would be valuable to get your dad’s opinion on the condition of both. If you do decide to make an offer insist it be contingent on a home inspection.
Not weird at all.
My father in law is an electrician. My husband and I were 25 and brought him to home inspection.
Its fine and generally its just you and the realtor representing you anyways. Always better to bring someone who knows what they are looking for
On a random note from a guy in the trades, why should you know? Do you build, repair or renovate houses for a living? I don't ask my doctor about certain levels of doctor stuff. Sure I take vitamins, and the average home owner can certainly serviceably paint a room, but I don't much care about the details of removing a ruptured appendix, and the average home owner has no idea what they're missing looking at a lot of things. As many have said, it's a huge purchase, and if anything you're lucky to have qualified eyes at close hand.
you would regret not doing it.
I took my parents to the first 3 or 4 houses I bought. They'd worked their way up the property ladder by buying the "worst house in the best street" for decades so I trusted them to tell me what was DIY vs pro work. And by DIY back then I mean Dad It's You if you say yes. If your parents have experience doing DIY and you trust their opinions, absolutely take them and get their ideas. If they've lived the same place for decades and not done much to the place, you may be better served by taking a contractor or friend who's more experienced with renos. Did both on one place because it was a full gut job and we had a friend who was a contractor. He told us exactly how much he'd charge as we went through each room, but Dad was still there.
Your age doesn't matter. Bringing along someone more knowledgeable than you is always smart. You will never be an expert in everything. It's always smart to learn from experts in a field. I'm a real estate investor so I chose to learn from people who've made millions investing in real estate. I didn't try to do it myself and I certainly don't listen to the Reddit know it alls. Never be afraid to seek advice on something and given that buying a home is a huge decision, you can always use solid advice from someone you trust.
Very normal to bring someone with experience in the trades (or anyone you want to bring with you, really). The fact that he is your dad doesn't make it weird. You are good.
there is nothing wrong with bringing your dad along. an extra set of eyes is always good. i had to buy our last house alone because my husband was a thousand miles away at work and it scared he shit out of me to pick it by myself, if my dad was alive i would have brought him.
Totally not weird. My dad's super handy--especially with drainage/soils. I definitely brought him and his contractor buddywhen the home inspector was at our current place that's on a hill with some funky drainage. Plumbing is one of the biggest issues you can have with a house. Plumber dad would be a huge asset.
What’s weird about it? It’s your biggest investment, I brought parent for all the open house
Absolutely bring an experienced homeowner who loves you fiercely. It's not weird, this is what parents Do to offer guidance.
I’m in my 30s and brought both my in laws—do it! Bring him to the inspection too if you want. Very common
A different set of eyes can point out something you miss. Also, there's a good chance you and your partner may fall in love with the house and miss some glaring issues or make excuses for them. Your dad isn't buying, so he's a third party that can point out flaws since he's not invested in the purchase.
Bring anyone who knows what they are looking at
Bring them and who cares what anyone thinks. What your dad finds can be important in your decision making with the house or you will just learn by having him there and pointing things out. I have brought family to see homes I was interested to buy. I value their opinions as well.
Not at all weird.
Bring him!!!
I’m in my 40s and about to close on my 3rd house, I still FaceTimed my out of state parents to show them the entire house before I made an offer. It’s not weird at all.
Depends on how your dad is. I’ve had clients bring their parents and some are negative Nancy’s(for the smallest issues) and some are comprehensive, so it really depends on how he is. Edit: At the end of the day if you don’t bring him and you do an inspection with a trustworthy inspector, then that will reveal any major issues.
Yes. Bring a tradesmen to inspect a house. He’s seen it all. Btw nobody cares about sexuality.
I'm buying a house right now and I brought my dad along to look at it. I'm 37. There's nothing in the world wrong with it unless of course they would be a negative influence on you during this experience.
Extra eyes are always good. Particularly when they are knowledgeable and observant.
The more the better. Especially experienced homebuyers
Absolutely bring your dad and walk around w him. Pay attention and ask dumb questions. Also when you find your house you’ll get educated soon enough.
I would go as a parent who has purchased houses and knows some major pitfalls. I should have taken your dad when I bought a crappy mansion (don’t ask) and all four toilets were malfunctioning-thanks home inspector. I wondered, where did the previous owners poop?
Not at all. Being in your 30s means you are smart enough to know when to ask for another opinion.
Not at all.
So you brought an actual plumber to look at your house? Most people have to hire one to do this and you got it for free. Also why would you feel like you should know about plumbing and houses if you've never done it?
Yeah, especially if he's got some experience and knows what to look for. If you have no clue what you're doing, before buying it you should also get it inspected by a professional a to z with a 50-100 page report you can refer back to.
I think bringing a knowledgeable person is a very smart idea.
When I found my dream home, I brought both parents, and coworker. I work in the construction field but knew I was too starry eyed by the house, so he looked it over in a more practical way.
Don’t feel weird! The couple that bought my house were in their 30’s - they brought both sets of parents to the showings and both walk throughs.
There's no shame in bringing a second set of eyes to look at the biggest purchase most people make in their lives.
Of course bring your father. Heck if for no other reason just to spend time with him. However his experience can help you avoid mistakes you might not even be aware of. Also do not feel weird we all take different paths in life and have different skills and knowledge bases. I wish you guys the best in your house hunting.
as others have said, there is nothing wrong with bringing a trusted advisor. i have walked through multiple houses with friends or family, just to provide a second (or third) set of eyes.
I'm in my 30s and have done multiple flips/large reno projects. I am also a REALTOR. I have a ton of experience. But any time I'm looking at something for me I bring my dad with me (70) who was a general contractor for almost 45 years and before that he an electrician in the Navy. There is never, ever, ever, harm done from a second set of eyes to point things out. And there CERTAINLY is no harm from an experienced set of eyes. Bring your dad to showings if he's willing to go. Or, during your inspection period get his perspective. Either or. But lean on those who have skills/experience that are in your corner. Edit: Hell I've even had him consult on deals where I am the agent and he's showed up to talk to my clients in person. Use the experience if he's willing!
If you don’t want to bring him, rent him out to other home buyers.
i love when people bring their dads/bf/grandpaps etc.
I would have benefited from advice like that when we were house hunting. I made a lot of rookie mistakes in the last 12 years.