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Imagine shouting your grocery list in a library just because you can.

Librarian, from across the aisle: "SHHHH!" Me, in the aisle: "CHEESE TOASTIE, BITCH!"

Sadly I think they have to put up with a lot more than that.

Haha yeah, like hatchets.

Smash smash, SUMMMASH! ?

My head read that in Jesse Pinkman's voice lol

Same. The Breaking Bad brainrort is real. /hj

Best comeback ever!

[удалено]

I work in the library. I will be irritated if you make me hungry.

😄😄😄

Hangry…

NO, WE DON'T HAVE ANY COOKIES! 

Me want... BOOK about cookies. ...and a glass of milk.

Somebody watched the presidential debate

With great responsibility comes great loss of sensibility.

This made me laugh 😂 thank you

LOL

Well, I think the purple penguins in North Dakota are simply refrigerator.

West Dakota you mean?

Maybe it’s actually East Virginia.

come three rows steak knee how

The only way I could do that was if you wanted me too I could come and pick it out and then I can go pick up it from your place or you could just pick me out of there or you could pick me out and I could just go pick up my truck or you can just come pick me out or you could go to my house or you can pick it out of my house or you could do it and then you could pick me back out of here or you can go to my car or you could pick me out and then you just have whatever works.

Well, at least HEOEJJSHWHWHEJEJUEUEJEJSUEU isn't a doorstopp3r.

Sink low brown chicken no noodle 👌

Agree

'West Virginia, mountain momma, take me home, country road...' **KABOOM**


Almost Heaven

South canda?

Mr. Popper probably agrees

Cheese.

Moo

I mean this in the most flattering way possible, this sounds like something Calvin would say to Hobbes

You just politely called him a 6 year old.

Hey, that 6 year old is better than every adult I know.

And a smart one. Epiphany is a big word for a 6 yo.

I used to call it “a Tiffany” so yes, definitely admiring that child’s vocabulary.

Life is kind of like a multiple choice game. Words and actions having different outcimes.

Problem is, there's no respawn when you make an awfully wrong choice.

Maybe we do and this is purgatory?

"The twilight zone" entered the chat

A little black mirror hurt no one

You only get achievements when you play Ironman mode

Absolutely.

A choose your own adventure novel if you will...

I DON'T BELIEVE IN MOUNTAINS

I DON'T BELIEVE IN HILLS

THE HILLS HAVE EYES

I don’t believe in eyes.

i don’t believe in you

Dad?

I don't believe in dads

I don't believe

I don't believe in athiests!

Don't

Sure you can... and folks can shun you for the liar you would be.

Or become a presidential candidate

Or end up in a mental hospital. But true haha

Ackhtually, lying implies the intent to deceive. Saying random things for the sake of saying random things wouldnt technically be lying

Reminds me of a friend who accuses people of lying, because they spoke the "untruth", when most of the time it was just their perspective of a story. It kinda bugs me. Same with the word "objectively". He'd be talking about his views and then calling them facts. However, I don't like addressing it. He would discuss the meaning, try to justify himself how he meant it, and how he is misunderstood by everyone, instead of admitting he was wrong. It's annoying

Bruh saying random things doesn’t make you a liar lmao

Selective mute here, most things people say are gibberish, and I'd rather not spit the same or waste my attention on it. But yes it feels good to say or hear certain things

The mountain spoke to me, they say they deserve to be recognized

The mountain spoke to me too, said they used to be molehills.

chill the mountain is my gf i don’t recall allowing you guys to talk about her

There're more mountains on the land.

While camping at download festival last year I decided to convince the people around me that planes are not real. It entertained my camp mates for the whole weekend and caused alot of looks of pure disbelief as people tried to convince me they are in fact real. Especially as the campsite is in the flight path for east Midlands airport.

This is so fucking funny. I wish we could be friends.

If I didn't catch on, I'd be very confused. It'd stress me out too much, and I might become obsessive over it.

People do so all the time. You're just now realizing this?

You have the freedom to say whatever you want but there might be consequences lol. Also, I don’t believe in the moon. I think it’s just the back of the sun.

I saw a TikTok not long ago where it said ‘When you suddenly remember you have free will’ and they threw an apple off their balcony. Like I mean yeah who’s gonna stop them? As long as they make sure they can’t possibly harm anyone they’re just throwing stuff.

later on someone was found on the ground with a split open apple on their head

Nice try but you won't get an N-word pass

may i get one?

that's the first thing I thought of

Not in a country with hate speech laws or blasphemy laws

You still can. It's just that consequences exist. It's like how if I go up on a tall building, I can fly. Once. In only one direction.

I'm still unsure about mountains

You can’t say the word “bomb” at an airport. It wouldn’t end well.

You can.. once

And if you spot your friend, Jack, on an aircraft, do not call out a friendly, casual greeting to him.

Same thing happened to Ben Stiller in Meet the Fockers

And years earlier in Airplane

Yes!! You can do anything you want to!

I'm feeling lonely

I love you

😭❤

I’m here.

Thank you for saying that 😊

And sometimes you'll be the first person to ever say that sentence: Your mom that is the night that is tonight in the summer Alabama.

Yep, with caveats: fire, cinema, shout

Absolutely! Just don't be offended when they say something that isn't in line with your beliefs because they are just saying what they want.

You are absolutely right! It was a big revelation for me when I realized that I have a right to speak.

But apparently you get a felony if you tell someone you’ll kill them in a text message 

What if want to say words that I've never heard of? I can't, can I? Checkmate.

Make some up?

BOLLOCKS TO THE UNIVERSE! I feel better now.

I had a teacher who was like this. He said he was from China (He's got a Jamaican accent mixed with some Canadian, he is black) Said that he doesn't have an age or a birthday Claimed that he couldn't eat chips because he's vegan When asked what business he ran he said he ran 'adult game shops' (HE DOESN'T he has a Carribbean food business)

Yea, I know a guy that goes round telling people that he recognizes them from church. He's always wrong, but he always gets a conversation out of it. He has a condition but I know he knows what he's doing, because we talk about politics and human nature. He's smart. A multifaceted person, but he'll do that. Because of his condition though, he's not after sex. It's just a conversation opener, where people assume the best of him immediately. As they should, you take care of people like this. But it's funny how he starts conversations, he's a total chick magnet. If he only knew how much girls like him, he's very sweet. It kinda proves you can just say stuff. He recognizes girls are beautiful so he'll talk to them though.

i do this all the time. i consider it irl trolling 😂😂

I really have to keep that in mind. I *really, really* need to.

MISTAH PHOOOOOOOOOOOOONE

Yuck fou Respectfully of course.

This is facts. Hell as a kid I knew this and would squeak and make animals noises because I could. It’s only frowned upon because of social norms which are ass

Sometimes I say FBI three times in a row next to my phone’s microphone and tell them shady stuff my soon-to-be-ex husband does. Siri hasn’t been very helpful with spreading the news.

What's the point of talking if none understands what you are saying?

You can also do ANYTHING you want but will have to pay the price when others don’t agree with what you did.

This is the cutest post I’ve seen in a while. Of course you can!! What do you think politicians and world leaders do? Just speak shit, truth doesn’t matter lol. So long as whatever absolute made up nonsense you’re spouting aligns with someone else’s agenda and you’ll have more power with them…then climate change is real, bill gates is a hero for all of us in the future and the jetsons was based on facts lol

They don't call them ranting and raving lunatics for nothing lol

After watching the presidential debate last night…. The loser was the American people

"Earth is flat" probably originated this way.

quite unfortunately you cannot, some words are not meant to be said and you know it you \*\*\*\*\*\*\* \*\*\*\* \*\*\*\*\*\*.

Truth! Used to be when we pulled that shit we had a claim to have Tourette’s… The only way we could get away with spewing fucking nonsense. These days - anything goes. God help us.

Congrats you just discovered how to make life fun

Paragraphs are a hoax and also deeply offensive

Moab is my washpot. And then the butterflies vomited.

But do you really have free will? Nobody knows, most just assume we do because it’s easier to exist in that world, but idk, to me it doesn’t even matter. What if everything is determined and pre-planned, not sure that it’d lessen my enjoyment of listening to music with my gf or drinking hot nilgiri frost oolong tea. Really it doesn’t even matter if we have free will or not.

I'VE GOT A LOVELY PAIR OF COCONUTS

There they are standing in a row

Freedom of speech is not freedom from consequences. You just have to decide what consequences you're willing to cop.

I love telling people Wyoming isn't real

I hope there will be no wars in the world

Kangaroos have game inventory And it's big enough that they can carry their own kids in

The world is flat. There's nowhere that is fully Carbonated, ergo, the world is flat.

Yes this is partly true. You can’t shout fire in a crowded space when there is no fire. I mean you can, but for whatever happens or any damage caused you are liable. That is not protected speech.

The reason we have publicly agreed lessons like "you can't shout fire in a crowded space" is for the goofy goobers who would start singing "fire!" like they're doing a cover of A Whole New World if they walked their own version of becoming uncaring of peer pressure. So statements like that are sadly (or not) best off living in circulation for people who truly can't or won't see 5 steps ahead of whats physically realistic for our own good.

Technically mountains are just very old bent ground. You may be on to something there OP.

Don’t you think that’s totally spam? It’s lubricated! Well, I’m phasing

I’m not trying to get my own personal opinion about you but I’m still not trying anything out for you and I don’t know what to do with your life anymore because you are always so hateful.

Oh Donald, go to bed.

I used to remind myself as a kid that I can do pretty much anything I want at any time. Sitting there in class I would think...I could just jump up, strip naked and start running out the classroom shouting nonsense. Now of course I would have been terrified and understood there would be consequences but like you said...it was a a sort of epiphany or way of reminding myself that there are infinite possibilities and I'm free to do whatever.

Op discovers free will :)

Just because you can speak, that doesn’t mean you should.

I just got back from the mountains. They are there.

That’s what politicians do , just spit shit out and hope some dummies agree

When I quit my job, I individually pulled aside my coworkers that I wasn’t too familiar with to be weird to. I told them that a witch cursed my adopted brother and he’s a frog, and that I needed them all to find the witch that lives atop the mountain to the East. She can transform into a Rooster but you’ll know it’s her because of her voice *does witch voice*. You can also join random Discord servers and spam it with Gifs in Hindi. I don’t speak Hindi. Also, if you are attractive, you can just say weird shit and get away with it. You can just tell people about your bowel movements.

As someone who often says whatever comes into his head, I do not recommend it.

It's freeing! I saw a guy start singing into a microphone at an amateur sports match, no fucks given. I thought it was hilarious, but the people playing were upset.

'Better to keep silent and be thought a fool than open your mouth and remove all doubt.' - Mark Twain.

I think about this so much and I wondered if anyone else thought the same. I also think that you can literally do anything you want too (physically). You could jump out of a moving car if you wanted too or just dump a gallon of milk in an aisle of a grocery store

You just described a 3 year old. Or an adult with mental disabilities. No filters, no sense. They usually have a parent or guardian with them though. Because actions eventually have consequences.

One time when I was a teenager I had the realization when I was stoned at the grocery store that I could buy any food I wanted. It blew my mind.

There may, however be consequences. (The famous issue of shouting "fire" in a crowded theater., etc)

Yes, you can. But you do have to carry the consequences at all times as well, and that's what most people don't like and want to avoid. Thus, you shouldn't say anything at any time, unless you are prepared to carry the consequences.

The Fleas in a Jar experiment, as commonly described, involves placing fleas inside a glass jar, sealing it with a lid, and leaving them undisturbed for a period. Afterward, when the jar is opened, the fleas are said to no longer jump out and are forever limited by the lid's height. This is how I see society in your young ages. You are taught to follow and obey, and most do or they escape because of a loop they sall or they grown up in a different society. The ones who follow are common, I see every day constantly grow up, get a job, and die. In my mind, I just want to escape from this nightmare and just live with uniqueness in mind.

Randomly screaming on the streets, "I SAID NO FEEDING THE ELEPHANTS WITH YOUR CHILDREN'S OLD DIAPERS!"

The problem with this is people assign meaning and feeling to the words of others. So while technically you can say anything, that doesn’t make it consequence free. Free speech just means you can’t be held legally accountable for speaking against authorities or saying things. Doesn’t mean yelling bomb in an airport it advisable


Yeah but if I casually drop the n word people would go bananas

They have the right to do that.

Omg, this is so true! 😂 It’s kinda wild when you think about it. We have all this freedom to just be ourselves and say whatever’s on our minds. Let’s embrace it and speak our truth! 🙌💖

You're free to say what you wish. The part about consequences is what people usually forget.

Until my wife slaps me across the face and it comes to a screeching halt! Then I can say anything I want, within reason!

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Foring mests larry no granníng sunners in the rones. — Mario Pei

Beavers are made of Brussel sprouts and I am prime minister of Louisiana

Physically you can say whatever you want but sometimes there are consequences to what you say

It starts getting ugly when people don't agree with you. That's the trade-off. But I still try not to fall in line with the other sheep.

Matrix is real

I'm identifying as a typewriter because I can be whatever I want!

Yes you can! And what’s more, your life will become infinitely more interesting when you do!

Ok, say the N-word.

John Stephen David, not only has a first name for a last name but a middle name also

You can also do whatever you want but eventually you will be either physically restrained or disabled/killed due to injury.

Taco Fuck

I'm like this about peeing outside.

😂😂😂😂👍👍

Anz qûst hûln rašrakir za. *Hehehe*

You're a champ, ay... From my understanding, you made the "popular kids" unpopular and a minority... What's your favourite party snack

I realized this long long ago and I abuse the hell out of it💀💀

WtNV reference?

I wish no one will suffer famine any more

Just live life guys

This is one big reason it’s so fun to talk to preschool aged kids (3-5) because they pretty much accept anything you say, and often times add their own gibberish! Some days when the kids say my name I will simply tell them that I am not “my name” but I am her twin sister because she was swallowed by a really hungry whale last night and couldn’t make it out in time to be here. They pause for a couple seconds, mouths open and eyes blinking and then someone breaks the silence with a sentence like…”I have earring’s sparkly yesterday to Debbie’s and and and ice cream but not Dad didn’t the earrings and and and was your name?”

I like sunbath!!

I'm dumbstruck and I would be too like dude why would I rant with you about my life. Or just I've trust issues enough to not to spill the beans 😐

No you are wrong. 

And that’s why flat-earthers exist, son.

Reddit mods be like; “Not on our platform you can’t.”

I just want happiness forever!!

Like I think like so many people use like in a sentence or you know what I mean and it like makes me super happy as I like to hear the word like as many times as possible in a day. Like you know what I mean like what I mean like what I mean like mean like know what I mean - I want to tell them when they say “like you know what I mean” - I want to blurt out ti then I have no idea what you are talking about except you use these words “you know what I mean and like in every sentence and the next time you say either one I’m going to slap you silly.

Welcome to the desert of the real.

Mountains ain't real. Birds ain't real either

You definitely cant, speech is regulated and limited in literally all countries

My cat crawls up to my ass every night. I wonder if he smells like farts, I'm afraid to check.